Unused Kinderquestria prompts from Thread #1 >"It was horrible!" >"What happened?" >"It's Anon's marefriend she- she-." >"She what?" >"She ate all the fries and didn't leave any for Anon!" >Gasps are heard all around >"And then- and then she put her tuft in his face!" >"What's so bad about that?" >"Without asking first!" >The sound of a pony vomiting can be heard >"And that's not even the worst of it!" >"What could be worse than that?!" >"When he complained about her eating all the fries she- she- she- she-" >Tears start rolling down her face >"She-he-he-he-he bo-ho-ho-ho-hooped hiiiiiiiiim!" >Sounds of multiple ponies hitting the floor as they faint -------- >Anon slips on a patch of ice >Breaks the fall with his hand >Gets a really nasty bruise that turns a dark purple >Nurse Redheart nearly vomits when she sees it >"Keep it together, Redheart. You didn't go through those years of school just to fall apart now!" >Applies ice to it >Anon leaves an hour later, and all his friends are waiting for him in the waiting room >Despite how silly this world is, Anon finds the gesture legitimately touching -------- >"Oh Celestia he's not going down!" >"He's a monster!" >"My mane! He got my mane!" >You are Anon >And you are going to enjoy taking over the world with water balloons and super soakers -------- >Celestia summons the Mane6 to Canterlot Castle to discuss a very serious issue >She got a vision about a long sealed bully breaking free to start bullying ponies all over again >Yeah, it's the dreaded Bully Bull >Legends say so many things about this meanie and his previous search for the dreaded Black Crown, which could make him immune to time outs and scoldings >Only the power of the Weelements of Harmony can stop this evil before he arrives to Equestria to kick sand on ponies' eyes or poke their food with it's dirty fingers, or... >Suddenly the room's door is kicked open >It's Anon >He's carrying a cracked baseball bat and he's wearing a dented black crown on his head >"Haha, oh wow. Hey poons, you will not believe what happened to me while I was doing the rounds to keep your faggy country safe and shit" >"See, this gayass bull popped out from nowhere and..." >Celestia and her ponies can only stare at him with their jaws hanging >"...again and again and again until this bat cracked and his balls exploded and..." >Celestia faints, the Mane6 quickly join her on the floor >"...blood everywhere but hey: free steaks and this bitchin' crown, yes?" ---------- [Post number 33701852] With the adult ponies being this childish I wonder how the kids are like >>33701852 They act more adult that the adults in the show half the time anyways so in this universe I bet they're more uptight and serious than a drill sergeant before the magic of friendship just mentally regresses them or something. >>33701917 So Flurry Heart is the most mature known character at this point... ---------- >Anon is picking wild berries with some ponies >Because yeah, the ponies might be pussies but they can cook a tasty jam like nobody's bussiness >A random pony discovers a path leading to a ravine covered with wildberry vines, so everyone decided to live dangerously and venture into this unexplored spot >Before they could trot in, a goblin-like creatire blocks their pass and points a round tipped knife at the ponies. >The faggy blade looks like an elementary school's safety scissor >"HEY, THIS SPOT IS MINE! NOBODY GETS IN WITHOUT MY PERMISSION!" >The ponies gasp in fear at view of this armed monster and all stop at once >"THE WILDBERRIES HERE ARE DELICIOUS BUT THEY ALL GROW TOO HIGH FOR ME TO REACH THEM! SO IF I CAN'T HAVE THEM, NOBODY WILL!" >The ponies nervously look at this angry goblin and then look at the tasty wildberries so close and yet so far from them >"B-but, but... sir, they all look so yummy and..." >"I SAID NOBODY CAN GET IN WITHOUT MY PERMISSION! NOW LEAVE BEFORE I GIVE YOU ALL AN OWIE!" >"Hey, faggot" >"Everyone turn their heads to Anon >"Can we have your permission to get in and pick some berries, dickmuncher?" >"WHAT?" >"Please, dickface." >"OH. GOSH... WELL, SINCE YOU ASKED SO POLITELY, I... I GUESS YOU CAN." >"Thanks, faggot. Let's go, pussies." >The ponies gasp in awe at this turn of events and slowly trot inside of the ravine, where they all fill their bags with berries >They they all leave with their sweet loot, but not before giving a couple bags to the goblin >"GOLLY! T-THANKS, PONIES." >"Please and thanks are the magic words, faglord. You know, some fuckin' education and gayass politeness will take you places. Right pussies?" >The confused ponies know there's a valuable lesson to be learned here, but they don't know where it is because Anon's poty mouth keeps confusing them." >"Tonight we will be boilin' sweet shit, motherfuckers!" >"Confusing them a LOT" ---------- >Anon is chilling on a park bench >Suddenly he notices somebody is staring at him >It's Fluttershy, siliently looking at his eyes while holding a biscuits can >Sigh >This fucking place >Anon takes the can from Fluttershy's hooves and she immediately zooms a block or so away >All nearby ponies do the same and in a moment Anon is all alone in the park >He sighs and waits until Fluttershy waves a hoof at him >Anon opens the biscuits can with a muffled *POP* noise >Even from that far away he can hear Fluttershy's yelp >She quietly flies back to Anon >He gives her the open can, which she quietly takes from his hands and barely manages to calm down enough to make a small smile and mumble a quiet "T-thank you..." before fluttering away to eat her biscuits >Fucking ponies >Why the fuck they still make the popping cans if the noise scares them shitless >A small popping noise catches Anon's attention >It's Pinkie Pie, holding a few balloons >She petrified with fear because one of her balloons just exploded >This fucking place --------- >Anon is cozily tucked in bed >The ponies might be a bunch of sissies but they can build some really comfy beds, he thinks >And apparently they can build great doorchimes too, because he can hear somebody calling at his door even if it's already night >Sigh >Okay, it must be something serious if a pony dared to go outside while it's dark >*Stomp stomp stomp* >It's Twilight, carrying Spike on her back. And both of them look scared shitless >Sigh >"Lemme guess: It's the monster in Spike's closet again?" >Pony and dragon faintly nod >Sigh >Anon grabs a cracked baseball bat >"Yeah, let's finish this quickly" >The trio walks all the way back to Twilight's castle and gets inside of Spike's room, where a dark, open closet errily greets them >Sigh >"Come on, little buddy. You are way too old for this shit." >Spike looks as if he were about to cry >"Oh, come ON. Fine." >Anon stomps inside of the closet and immediately Twilight and Spike are shocked by some blood curdling screams and whacking noises coming from inside >Anon stomps outside, carring a blood stained baseball bat in a hand and dragging a bruised, bloodied monster with the other arm >"..." >"DUDE, WHAT THE HECK? I-I WAS JUST HIDING IN THAT CLOSET TO NOT SCARE ANYONE! WHAT HAVE I EVER DONE TO YOU, YOU BIG MEANIE?" >"Ah, shaddap, faggot." *CRACK* >Anon hands over the bloody bat to Spike >"Here, champ. Next time YOU get rid of the monster like the badass dragon you are" >Spike and Twilight say nothing because they already fainted while standing >"Pussies" >Anon walks away dragging the monster with him >"SNIFF... SERIOUSLY, WHAT HAVE I EVER DONE TO YOU?" >"I said SHADDAP!" (KICK) ---------- >Ponies get mad that Anon didn't tell them when his birthday was ---------- >that time Anon announced he went poo poo by himself and all the ponies congratulated him and hugged him and threw him a party all with complete sincerely ---------- everypony sees Anon as a parental from his attitude and decision making, regardless of how he feels. ---------- [Post number 33750255] >Monocellular Kinderquestria >Cute little pones absorbing things into their body >>33750255 >little poners can fulfill their "make some friends" homework assignments by befriending Anon >technically they're making a couple billion friends >>33750519 >Due to some fucked up 'MIrror-esque' shenanigans, Anon transforms into this strange, new Equestria. >No, he doesn't become a pony or whatever...but it might be arguably worse. >Somehow, he becomes Monocellular...however, that's no easy task with a being made up of so many god damned cells. >The Magic of the World utterly fucks up in such a beautiful way because Anon becomes a couple BILLION Anons. >Most keep the basic mindset of The Anon while others attempt to replicate the duties they were meant to do when they were just regular body cells. >Monocellular Kinderquestria has accidentally created an Anonymous Legion.. >>33750764 I remember a prompt like this once where anon doesnt visibly change, but monocelluar equestria causes every single one of his cells to gain a consciousness and his sub-conscious basically becomes king by virtue of basically being that already. The main consciousness of anon is mildly perturbed when he realises he is effectively a personified nation unto himself. ---------- >Anon arrives in Equestria..somehow. >He decides NOT to freak out and even goes out of his way to approach a pony and greet them! "Hell-" >That's when the Pony screams 'Stranger Danger' and runs off to be in a group with other ponies staring at Anon oddly. >..it was as if a bunch of school children were afraid of the big, bad adult. "The hell, I only said hi-" >"HE CURSES TOO! AHH!" >Life was...not going to be totally fun here, was it? ----------- >Anon was a bit of a loner back on Earth >Never had that much physical contact with other people, it kind of makes him uncomfortable >Ponies hear about this and treat him like he is a victim of severe abuse >Now ponies go out of their way to give him lots of hugs >He resisted at first but now he just accepts it >Can never walk anywhere without at least one pony held in his arms or just clinging onto him >His social skills improve as he transitions from grumpily trudging around with annoying poners clinging to him to willingly carrying them and chatting as he walks >Carries a bag of candies with him that he feeds to the ponies as he walks, like feeding seeds to birds >If he lays down on the grass a living blanket of ponies will form on top of him within minutes >Anon realises how much his body was craving a simple hug and somepony to ask how his day was going >M-maybe he was abused? >Nah, this world must just be getting to him