>Order a 'random selection' discount Chinese pony model. >Hope it's something cool. >Probably not though, since you've heard how crappy these things are. >And a random selection model was all you could afford. >Finally, it arrives. >Giant box with yellow masking tape all fucking over it. >It seems someone spilled a mystery liquid on it as well. "Well, let's see the damage." >Open box. >Styrofoam peanuts everywhere. >There's a piece of paper with a bunch of Chinese moon runes on it. >Though, at the top there is some English writing. >'Model 0023. Derby Hoobs' >The paper falls out of your hands. "Oh God... What have I done?" >>32051446 >You don't know why you did it. >No- you know exactly why you did it. >This never ending loneliness will make the lowest man howl at the moon... >Ah fuck, you're kind of drunk. >Well, the Derpy Hooves pony bot is finished. >She sits on your living room floor, still lifeless. >You have her plugged in to your computer, still booting up. >This 'Derby Hoobs' is a mess. >Her mane and tail are orange. >Fucking orange. >And one of her wings is missing. >You decided to attach the one wing, in the hopes she could still get some use out of it. >Okay, so for whatever reason, the Chinese manufacturers decided to put her model number on her head. >There is a bright red '23' stamped in the middle of her forehead. >And last but not least: her eyes. >Yes, they got the 'derpiness' of her eyes right. >It's the color that's all wrong. >To be honest, her eyes are creepy. >They are red. >Crimson red.   >>32051783 >When you first plugged her in to the computer to boot up, they glowed, then went dark again. >It made your heart skip. >You hope they don't glow like that when she comes to life. >Another odd feature is that her tail is way too long. >It's like they forgot to turn the machine off that made her tail. >When she walks, it's going to drag on the floor behind her. >Oh well, maybe you'll trim it up later. >Right now, you just want to get her started up. >And another beer... >You get up to go to the kitchen. >Maybe this was a mistake. >There's no way this thing could come close to the ponies you've loved for years. >"HELLO!" >You almost piss yourself and drop your beer bottle on the floor. >Turning around, you almost piss yourself again. >Glowing crimson eyes are staring at you. >Well, one glowing crimson eye anyway. >Derby is smiling up at you, sitting on her haunches. >That cheery smile with the demon eyes is seriously making the hairs on the back of your neck rise. >But what really seems wrong- >"MY NAME IS DERBY HOOBS. IT'S A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU, ANONYMOUS." >Oh God... >Her voice sounds just like Gilbert Gottfried. >"I AM SO EXCITED TO START A BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP WITH YOU. PLEASE TAKE CARE OF ME FROM NOW ON."   >>32051785 >No. >Fuck no. >You run back over to your computer and start going through the software settings. >You notice that Derby's derpy eye follows your movements while she stays facing toward your kitchen. >There is NO way you're going to have a damn Gottfried pony. >Finally, you find the 'voice modulator' setting. >It's actually preset to 'Gilbert'. >What the hell is wrong with China? >You scroll through a rather large list of voice settings. >At the top is the 'Derby Original' setting. >You click that like no tomorrow. >Looking behind you, you see Derby's eyes blink like traffic lights. >Did she just reset? >She looks down and her eyes suddenly focus. >You lean over your chair closer to her. "Hello?" >The pony slowly turns her head to you. >Oh fuck, that's probably the creepiest thing you've ever seen... >She's still smiling and her blood eyes are zeroed in on you. >She slowly stretches out her wing and raises it toward the roof. "Um, Derby?" >She tilts her head, still smiling. >"Is that my name?" >Well, her voice sounds normal. >At least, it sounds like the Derpy Hooves from the original episode when she talked. >Only, it sounds... Empty. >Despite the smile, there is a definitive melancholy in her voice. "Yes, your name is Derby. My name is Anonymous." >You should call her Derpy. >But, somewhere in your mind you hold on to a selfish notion. >That is not Derpy. >"Why am I here?" >>32051790 >That catches you off guard. >She flaps her one wing and reaches up with a hoof, touching her face. >"What am I, Anonymous?" >Damn. >You're going to need another beer for this. "You're... You're a pony, Derby." >You don't want to tell her what she really is. >She folds her wing to her side and nods slowly. >Her eyes go derpy again. >There's still that smile. >Maybe she can't not smile? >You get up and make to go for the kitchen again. >"Please don't leave me." >You stop and look back at Derby. >In complete silence, she moved when your back was turned. >You flinch back from the ponybot mere inches from you, looking up with those glowing eyes and that haunting smile. >Your eyes are drawn to the '23' on her forehead. >"Please, take Derby with you, Anonymous." >You swallow and nod slowly. "Okay. I'm just going into the kitchen to get a drink. You can come with, if you want?" >Derby just stares up at you, unblinking and smiling. "Oooookay." >Turning around again, you walk into the kitchen. >A quick look back and you see that Derby is following. >She is still attached to the computer by her cord, but it unplugs and falls to the floor when she gets far enough away. >She makes absolutely no noise when she walks. >Her wing hangs limply down at her side, grazing the floor as she goes. >Her tail drags like a snake behind her. >And that smile... >"Please don't leave me, Anonymous." >You give her a sad look and open the fridge. "I'm not going anywhere, Derby. I promise I won't leave you." >Derby sits down on the kitchen floor and her eyes focus on you again as you open a beer with shaky hands. >"Promise... You, promise Derby. Okay." >With a nod, she looks down at her hoof. >You take a big drink and watch her examine herself. "Are you okay, Derby?" >She whispers so softly, you barely make it out. >"I promise I am not experiencing pain..." >>32051797 >You freeze in place, the hairs on your neck rising again. "What was that?" >Derby looks up at you again. >Her eyes are looking in different directions. >One at the ground, one at the beer in your hand. >Slowly, the eyes move and focus on you. >It takes everything you have to not look away. >Her smile seems to get larger. >"Please don't leave me, Anonymous." >You sigh and take another large drink. "I promised I wouldn't, remember?" >Derby finally closes her eyes. >"I remember something. You made a promise. You promised, Anonymous." >Her eyes open again and seem to glow brighter. >"Anonymous promised Derby. Derby remembers. Please don't leave me." >You won't get any sleep tonight. >>32051801 >A blanket is pulled over your head. >Only a bit of your face sticks out. >Enough to breathe and stare at your bedroom wall. >Behind you, you can feel them. >Those glowing crimson eyes are burning into the back of your head. >Derby seems to have one setting when it comes to personal space. >Magnetic. >Wherever you go, Derby follows. >Always asking you to please not leave her. >She crawled up into your bed when you went to lay down. >Because of the instruction manual being in Chinese (with no damn diagrams either), you don't know where Derby's power switch is. >Does she even have one? >How long does her battery charge last? >For twenty minutes now, Derby has sat behind you, watching you try to sleep in your blanket cacoon. >Just staring at you.   >>32052228 >There's got to be some way to change her settings. >Tomorrow, you will mess with that. >But for now, you need to sleep. >You have work tomorrow. >As you think of work, your eyes begin to slowly close. >"Anonymous." >The soft melancholy voice snaps your eyes back open. "What is it, Derby?" >You feel her weight shift behind you. >Your cell phone charging on the bedside table creates enough light to cast a shadow of Derby on the wall in front of you. >You can see that she is stretching her wing toward the ceiling again. >It's an ominous sight. >"Derby thought you were leaving." >You sigh and pull the blankets tighter around your face. "I'm just trying to go to sleep." >Silence fills the room. >"Please don't sleep. Derby will be alone." >>32052232 >Damn it. >You sit up suddenly and grab the TV remote off your bedside table. "How about I let you watch something while I sleep?" >The glowing eyes stare back at you in the dark. >You turn on your small bedroom tv. >The History Channel is on, showing a documentary about the Titanic. "How about this?" >You look back to Derby. >She stares at the TV, both eyes focused. >It seems like she's entranced. "Derby?" >You wave a hand in front of her face. >She keeps on staring straight ahead, focused on the show. "Nice." >Laying back down, you pull the blanket comfortably up to your chin and sigh. >Finally, some sleep. >You stare at the ceiling. >Looking one last time at Derby, your breath catches in your throat. >Her head is turned back toward you. >Those red eyes glow like embers. >"I like this. Thank you, Anonymous."   >>32052239 >You move your feet against each other under the blankets. "Uh, that's good. You should keep watching then." >Derby just smiles at you. >The glow from the TV behind her makes the sight even more unnerving. >"Goodnight, Anonymous." >Her head turns back around and she is hypnotized by the tv again. >You reach over to your bedside table once more, this time opening the drawer. >Pulling out your bottle of cough syrup, you open it and take a quick swig. >You want to fall asleep as quickly as possible. >Deeply asleep. >The faint noises of the Titanic documentary carry to your ears for a while. >Then the effects of the diphenhydramine start to take hold. >You feel Derby rest her wing on your leg. >As you fall into a drug-induced sleep, you feel a twinge of guilt. >It feels like you are leaving her, in a way. >>32052244 >The sound of your alarm wakes you up. >You turn it off and groan against your pillow. >A dreamless sleep. >It's time to get ready for work. >First, a shower- >You go to move, but now that your mind is slowly waking up, you notice a weight near your legs. >Between your legs. >You look down and are met with a red-eyed stare. >Derby lays curled up between your legs. >The TV is still on in the background. >Derby smiles at you. >"Good morning, Anonymous." >You yawn and hoist yourself up. "Mornin'. Did you sleep, Derby?" >Derby's eyes wander off. >"Yes. Derby slept for three hours, forty-six minutes and eight seconds." >You chuckle and rub your eyes. "That's pretty precise. I hope your sleep-mode was enjoyable." >You get out of bed and stretch. >"Derby had a dream."   >>32052254 >As you smoke a cigarette out on your back balcony, Derby watches you. >It's been a long time since you have smoked. >Your nerves need it. >Just as always, she smiles. >Since you had one of those closed off balconys, you let the ponybot follow you outside. >She followed you into the bathroom when you did your morning routine. >It was kind of awkward taking a piss with her standing right behind you. >Luckily, she didn't try to follow you into the shower when you went in. >She just sat outside the curtain. >Smiling. >You tried to ask her what her 'dream' was about. >But she only stated she didn't remember. >It's hard for you to believe that she can even have a dream. >Maybe it's a pre-programmed response? >As you smoke, you watch one of Derby's eyes follow a bird soaring through the sky. >She turns her head to track its movement. >When it is out of sight, Derby extends her wing out and looks over at it. >You can practically hear the gears turning in her head. >Maybe you should have just left the wing detached... >>32057142 "Derby, do you want to fly?" >The ponybot looks away from her wing and back to you. >The wing drops and hangs limply at her side. >For a moment she doesn't say anything. >Then- >"No. I don't like that." >Your brow furrows. >Shouldn't she be programmed with an 'instinct' to fly? >"Derby doesn't want to fly. Derby wants to stay on the ground, with you." >Oh, that's actually kind of cute. >It would be a lot cuter if she didn't sound like her pet fish just died though. >"Derby will never leave Anonymous. Derby promises." >You look back at the sky, smoke drifting past your eyes. "Yeah..."   >>32057144 - >You have to leave. >It's time to go to work. "Derby, I have to go to work now, okay?" >She sits on the couch, smiling at you as you put your shoes on. "Hey, I didn't think of this, but are you going to be fine with your battery life while I'm at work?" >Derby looks down. >"My charge is at seventy-nine percent. Derby will plug herself in to charge when battery life drops below forty percent." >Well that takes care of that. >You stand up and take out your car keys. "Okay, Derby. I'm going now. Maybe you should just go into sleep-mode until I'm back?" >She just stares at you from the couch. >You really don't want to leave her alone in your apartment. >Didn't really think of that when you decided to order a ponybot. "See you later." >You exit your apartment and close the door behind you. >Just as the latch catches, something slams into the door on the other side. >>32057146 >It makes you recoil away. >You can hear Derby slamming her hooves against the wood. >It sounds like even her wing is beating against it. >"Anonymous? Where are you?" >Her sad little voice is muffled through the door. >"Anonymous, don't leave Derby!" >You quickly open the door back up. >Derby sits smiling up at you. >"Hello, Anonymous. Welcome home." >You sigh and rub your temple. >This isn't going to work. >Thinking quickly, you enter the apartment and close the door behind you. "Derby, I have to go to work. But how about I leave the TV on for you?" >Derby follows you over to the couch silently. >You pick up your remote and turn the TV on. >Derby's attention is drawn to it immediately. >Both of her eyes zero in on the screen. >She's completely transfixed, standing in front of the couch. >With a chuckle, you bend down and pick her up. >>32057149 >She's light. >Maybe around forty pounds. >Her fur is soft, and her wings are covered by a surprisingly high quality batch of synthetic feathers. >But you can still feel the solidness of metal and polymer below her coat. >Her eyes stay fixed to the commercial on TV, but her front hooves wrap around your neck suddenly. >You can't place her down on the couch. >She has you wrapped in a tight hug. >Her head nuzzles under your chin as she watches the commercial over your shoulder. >Suddenly, you want to call in sick to work. >This is what you wanted when you ordered Derby. >You shift your arms a bit and return the hug. >Her belly is against your torso. >Unbreathing. >There is no warmth coming from her. >But the feeling of her squeezing you close and the feeling of her coarse mane against your neck makes you close your eyes. >'Don't leave me, please.' >>32057154 >No. >You have to go to work. >With effort, you grab Derby's sides and peel her away from you. >She hangs suspended in your outstretched arms, still staring at the TV behind you. >You place her on the couch, her long tail draping over the edge and down to the floor. "Derby, I'm leaving now." >She stares straight at the TV. >"I want to watch Titanic." >You raise an eyebrow. >Oh, that's right. >Last night she watched that documentary. >Luckily, you actually have a copy of The Titanic on DVD. >A gift long ago from your mother. >You go over to your DVD rack by the TV and find it. >Popping it into the DVD player, you grab the remote and set it up. >After a short explaination of the controls to Derby, you get ready to leave again. >Derby sits on the couch, lost in the world of the doomed ship. >Her eyes seem to be glowing in waves. >Like she's processing information. >After work, you will plug her in and see what you can do about some of her settings. >She lays down with her head resting on her front hooves, her red eyes never leaving the screen. >You open the front door and look back at her. "I'm going to work, Derby." >She doesn't move. "I'll be back around five." >Her eyes are one with the TV. >With that, you step outside and close the door behind you, locking it. >The only sound from the other side is the faint music from The Titanic, taking Derby to another world.   >>32057158 >Work was shit. >You work in a restaurant, as a cook. >It's not glorious, but it pays the bills. >Barely. >You drive home in your piece of shit car. >Right after work, you stopped at the corner store to pick up some stuff before going home. >Some fresh cigarettes, beer (Pabst, because it's cheap) and another bottle of cough syrup. >You feel sort of gutted about picking up smoking again. >It's been over six months since you quit. >And the NyQuil- >Well, it seems you are going to have to start leaving the TV in your room on for Derby while you sleep. >The NyQuil will help. >Derby was on your mind all day. >You pull into your apartment complex and park, flicking your spent cigarette out of the window before rolling it up. >Before you can even turn your car off, your phone starts going off in your pocket. >You cut the engine and dig your phone out. >The screen reads 'MOM'. "Damn..."   >>32057447 >You light another cigarette before you answer. "Hello?" >"Where are you?" >Her voice is loud and you press the 'volume down' button a couple of times. "I just got home from work." >"Oh. I'm making dinner." >That seems like a blunt anecdote, but you immediately understand the implication. "I can't come over tonight. I'm too tired." >You lean your seat back and blow a big cloud of smoke at the roof of your car. >"You haven't been over in two months." >Has it been that long? >"Well, whatever." >She's annoyed. >"I have mail for you. Come get it whenever." >It's annoying that your mail still sometimes shows up there. "I'll come over this-" >"It's a letter for debt collection. How much do you owe?" >Your heart sinks. >>32057454 "You opened my mail?" >"It came to my house. Your father wanted me to throw it out. How much do you owe?" >You close your eyes and let the cigarette burn between your lips. "I don't want to talk about it. I'll come over this weekend to pick it up, okay?" >"When are you going to get your shit together, Ano-" >You hang up on her and throw your phone down on the passenger seat. >For a while, you sit staring out of the windshield at the cardboard dumpster in front of your car. >The cigarette in your mouth has burned out and a large portion of ash drops into your lap. >You groan and get out of your car, grabbing the plastic bag from the corner store and slamming the door shut. >Today was a shitty day. >>32057460 - >Derby is exactly where you left her. >You enter your apartment and quickly close the door behind you. >Derby is still on the couch, staring at the TV. >The Titanic is still playing. >She must have watched it at least two times already. "I'm home, Derby." >Her eyes never leave the TV. >You walk over and pick up the remote, pointing it at the screen. >When it goes black, Derby hops right off the couch and slinks over to you. >She sits at your feet and smiles up at you, one eye drifting off. >"Welcome home, Anonymous. Derby missed you." >You set the plastic bag on your coffee table. "I missed you too. How was your day?" >Derby's wing suddenly reaches forward and brushes against your leg. >You stand still as her wing pats your knee. >"Derby doesn't remember." >>32057465 >She smiles up at you as her wing continues to slide around your pant leg. >Is she doing it on purpose? "Well, it seems like you watched Titanic a few times." >You pull your leg away from her and pull a beer from out of the bag. "I'm gonna make something to eat and then we can plug you into the computer, okay?" >She just watches you open your can of beer with her smile. >As you take a drink, your eyes are drawn to the red '23' on her forehead. >You lean down and brush your thumb across it. >Some of her mane slides over the back of your hand. >Her eyes cross, following your hand and her mouth opens silently. >The painted numbers feel indented, like they we roughly stamped into her skull. >"Anonymous, how was your day?" >Her wing comes up again and starts doing its strange patting motion against your wrist. >Now you are aware of what is happening. >Just as you were curious about the numbers on her forehead, Derby must be curious about you. >Her wing seems to be examining you.   >>32057467 >You straighten up again and take another drink. "It was... Good." >You grab the bag from the table and walk to the kitchen. >Derby follows, her wing brushing the back of your legs. >It feels sort of surreal- >A robot trying to physically examine you. >But you don't mind. >You turn on the kitchen light. >It's a small kitchen. >A dingy kitchen. >The yellowed light makes it seem like the place is always grimy, no matter how much you clean. >You set your bag on your slightly tilted table and pull the cans of beer out. >In the corner is your small fridge. >You open it and place the beer inside. >Aside from the beer now, your fridge is pathetically sparse. >A carton of eggs. >Some pickles. >Some expired chicken breast. >'When are you going to get your shit together?' >You quickly close the fridge and sit at the kitchen table with your beer. >The light flickers overhead. >You sigh and stare at the scratched up table top. >Without thinking, you reach into the bag again and pull out the NyQuil. >Sleep is all you want right now. >You open the medicine and take a large drink.   >>32057473 >It makes you shiver. >A sudden noise draws your attention. >Derby is pushing your other wooden chair toward where you sit. >She slides it across the linoleum until it bumps against your chair. >With a smile, she crawls up on the chair beside you. "Derby?" >The ponybot takes a seat next to you and leans her head against your side. >Her wing wraps around your back. >She moves her head against your ribs, like she's nuzzling you. >"How was your day, Anonymous?" >That makes your chest tighten up. >You take another drink of beer. >With one arm, you reach around Derby and pull her small body against you. >Your eyes wander over to the counter. >Beside your microwave sits a stack of mail. >All of the letters state the same thing. >'How much do you owe?' >"Did you have a good day, Anonymous?" >>32057478 >You close your eyes and take another drink. "It was bad. But I'm doing better now." >Derby's wing pats your back. >"Derby wants to be better too." >You look down at the top of her head. >The light flickers again and for a moment only the red glow of her eyes light the room. "How are you feeling, Derby?" >In the silence that follows, you fill yourself with more alcohol. >The cough syrup feels heavy in your gut. >"Derby was lonely." >So she does remember. >That hollow feeling returns. >"But Derby learned." >Your hand brushes over her side. >Across the notch where her missing wing should be attached. "Learned what?" >Her wing moves up to your neck and the feathers slide across the bare skin of your neck. >Goosebumps spread over your flesh and you shiver again. >"Derby learned that if she is lonely, she can press play."   >>32057481 >Press play? >Ah, she means the DVD. >It's a good thing you actually had that. >You nod and finish your beer. "That's good. I don't want you to be lonely." >Finally, your pathetic kitchen light gives out. >You are left sitting in darkness. >Save for Derby's glowing eyes. >"Can we press play?" >You stand up, Derby's wing sliding down your body. >You open the fridge and grab a new beer, throwing your empty one into the trash. "Alright. Let me smoke a cigarette and then we can watch Titanic together, okay?" >Her eyes stare back at you in the dark. >"Anonymous?" >You open your beer. >"Are we lonely?" >The sound of your neighbors arguing next door comes through the thin wall. >You reach into your pocket and take out your cigarettes. >A dog starts barking outside as the sound of police sirens scream past on the street below. "Let's press play, Derby." >>32057483 >It's hard to say exactly when you fell asleep. >You don't remember. >NyQuil will do that to you. >The first thing you notice when you awake on your couch is the wetness on your waist. >Second, the sun is trying to shine into your living room through the closed blackout curtains. >Third, the wetness in your pants turns out to be from the spilled beer can that was in your hand when you fell asleep. >Your waist and a spot on the couch are soaked. >This is not the first time your couch got a beer bath. >The fourth thing you notice is- >"Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?!" >"SpongeBob SquarePants." >Your blurry eyes look up to where the SpongeBob theme song is playing on the TV. >Derby is standing only a foot or so away from the screen. >As she sings along, she shakes her butt from side to side. >Her wing is held high and her long tail swishes on the ground behind her. >"If nautical nonsense be something you wish!" >Derby keeps shaking her back end in an awkward jig and sings back to the screen. >"SpongeBob SquarePants."   >>32067478 >Her singing voice is flat and morose sounding. >But she seems to be happy, dancing and bobbing her head. >Your head is killing you. >And your stomach is sick. "Derby..." >The pony turns her head around while still shaking her butt. >Her ever-present smile greets you. >"Good morning, Anonymous. SpongeBob SquarePants." >You take the empty beer can from beside your waist and place it on the table in front of you, where six other empty cans stand. "Yeah. SpongeBob SquarePants." >You grab your phone from off the armrest and check the time. >Two in the afternoon. >Derby turns back to the TV. >Even though the song is over, she still jitters a bit. >Luckily, you don't have work today. >Your head throbs. >There's a nasty taste in the back of your throat. "Ugh..." >>32067487 >You grab your pack of cigarettes from the coffee table and take one out. >Never have you smoked in your apartment, but right now you can't find the intestinal fortitude to make your way outside. >So you light upright on the couch. >"Derby likes this show." >You lean back on the couch and look at Derby. >Her head moves slightly, following the movements of characters on the screen. >Without an ashtray, you grab the beer can you just set down and ash your cigarette into it. >"SpongeBob SquarePants." >Today you will plug Derby back in and examine her settings. >Today you will. >But after a nap. >You're soaked in beer and your head feels like ground beef. >There's no point in trying to deal with this right now. >So you take the half-empty bottle of NyQuil from the table beside the couch and have a drink from that. >At least you don't have to work today. >There's really nothing for you to do. >So you finish your cigarette and drift back to sleep. >The last thing you remember is the sight of Derby bouncing happily in front of the television.   >>32067495 - >Today is the seventeenth. >Your phone bill comes out today. >The TV and internet comes out in two days. >And the car insurance is today as well. >One more paycheck this month and then your rent is due on the first. >You sit at your kitchen table, looking at the sheet of paper where you've tracked bills. >There's not much to work with in terms of money. >It took a lot of saving to buy Derby. >That's part of the reason why your fridge is so bare now. >You put your phone down and creak back in your chair, sighing and running a hand through your hair. >Derby watches from her chair right beside you. >You take a drink of beer and pat her head. "I have to go shopping, Derby." >You are hungry. >It's a bad idea to go grocery shopping on an empty stomach, but you desperately need food. >It's a good thing Derby doesn't need to eat. >"I want to go shopping with Anonymous." >You finish your last can of beer and toss it into the overflowing trash. "No. You have to stay here, Derby." >"Please don't leave Derby alone." "I'm just going to the store, I'll be right ba-" >There's a sudden knock at your front door. >>32067503 >No one ever visits in the evening. >No one ever visits. >You get up and go into the living room, with Derby following on your heels and her wing brushing against your legs. >Going to the front door, you look out through the peephole. >Your mother stands on the other side of the door. >The sight makes a sinking feeling in your stomach. >There is no way you can let her see Derby. >So you pick the pony up and rush to your bedroom. >Derby wraps her legs aground your neck and you almost run into a wall when her wing comes up to pat your face. >"I like it when you hold me, Anonymous." >You peel her off and set her down on your bed. "Okay, Derby... Please stay in here. Don't come out until I come get you, okay?" >Derby just sits and smiles at you. >One of her eyes drifts down. >As insurance for her compliance, you turn the TV on. >Her attention is drawn to the screen instantly. >It's still on the History Channel, so hopefully Ancient Aliens will keep her distracted. >With that, you leave your bedroom and close the door behind you.   >>32067517 >Outside, you can hear your mom pounding on the front door. >From the kitchen, the sound of your phone buzzing on the table reaches your ears. >You bound over and unlock the three different locks on your door and open it. >Your mother's grumpy face stares at you. >"Why didn't you answer your phone?" "I didn't know you were planning on coming over." >You can see her eyes scanning the inside of your apartment behind you. >Shifting your body in the door frame, you try to block her view. >"I was out at my book club, so I decided to come by and check on you. So you're smoking again, huh?" >You try not to glare at her. >It's really hard. "Yeah. Sorry, but I'm actually going to go to the grocery store soon." >She is still trying to look into your apartment. >"At nine at night?" "I was asleep today. Walmart is open twenty-four hours." >"Are you going to invite me in?" She snaps. "I'm about to leave." >She makes her impatient face and you can tell she doesn't care about anything you have to say. >"I have something for you." >You see that down in the parking lot, there are three guys standing near a car, smoking. >They all look like tweekers and are watching you speak with your mother. "Alright, come on in."   >>32067535 >You move aside and your mother rushes past you. >Once the door is closed and locked, you turn and see that your mom is staring down at your coffee table. >It's cluttered with the usual mess of papers, cups, knick-nacks and used plates. >But now there are empty beer cans with ash on the tops, a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of NyQuil. >"You're smoking in here?" >You sigh and go to do damage control on the kitchen before she can see it. "Only a bit. I didn't-" >"That's disgusting." >You roll your eyes and march into the kitchen. >There's nothing you can do. >The pile of dirty dishes in the sink. >The trash overflowing next to the fridge. >The mess on the table. >So instead of trying to mask the filth, you just grab your phone. >Your mother comes into the kitchen and makes a disgusted 'tch' sound. >"I wasn't expecting it to be this bad." "Yeah. I get it. I really have to get going soon. I haven't eaten today." >She steps over an empty box of cereal on the ground and over to the table, acting like anything she touches will try to bite her. >"Here." >She places a slip of paper down on the table. >You lean over and look as she takes a pen out of her purse. "What is that?" >"How much do you owe?" >She starts filling out a check. >Your stomach clenches and you lean back. "Listen, I don't need-" >"How much do you owe?" >You know she's not going to give this up. >With a sigh, you run a hand through your hair. "Three thousand..." >She looks up from the check and gives you a look. >That look hurts more than anything. >A mixture of irritation and disappointment. >With a 'tch', she finishes filling out the check. >"I'm not going to ask why. I'm not going to tell you how to fix what you have done." >She folds the check in half and slides it in front of you. >"Just get it together." >You look into her cold eyes. >"For the love of God, Anon. Get. Your shit. Together."   >>32067541 >The only thing you can do is stare at her with your mouth slightly open. >Without a word, she hoists her purse up on her shoulder and exits your kitchen. >You stare down at the check in front of you. >It seems too heavy to pick up from the beat up table. >The sound of your front door slamming makes you look up. >You sit staring at the door of the kitchen in silence. >"Anonymous?" >Derby pokes her head into the kitchen. >She smiles at you, on eye looking over toward the stove. >"Is it okay for Derby to come out?" >She's already- >You offer her a weak smile. "Yes, Derby. Thank you." >The ponybot walks silently into the kitchen. >Without a word, she crawls up into your lap. >You shift in your chair, caught off guard. >Derby wraps her hooves around your neck and hugs you tightly. >Her mane slides across your face in an orange mesh. >"I am your Carpathia." >That makes you blink in confusion. >Derby's wing wraps over your head. >It almost feels like a hand pulling you closer. >"I will save you from drowning, Anonymous." >You feel the tears welling up in your eyes. "Damn..."   >>32067547 - >You were wrong. >All wrong. >The calculations were all wrong. >There's less money in your bank account than you thought. >It turns out you only have fifty dollars left. >Fifty dollars to your name. >After the phone bill and insurance, you don't even have enough to pay the TV and internet bill. >And now there is even less after your trip to the store. >After checking your bank account and finding your meager funds, you had to make a choice. >So now, as you stand in your kitchen looking at your 'groceries', you feel drained. >The box of ramen noodles and cans of beefaroni will have to last you for the next week. >You can do it. >Of course- you didn't NEED the beer, NyQuil and cigarettes. >Of course. >But you bought them anyway. >You light a cigarette and take a drink of NyQuil as you listen to the sounds of The Titanic playing on the TV in the living room. >The feeling of the syrup sliding down your throat helps. >You ash your cigarette into the sink and look over at the table. >Your mother's check still lays in the same place. >Three thousand dollars. >You can pay off your debt. >Or- >You could use some to buy food...   >>32067550 >No. >You have to get your shit together. >There's a vibration in your pocket and you slap your hand to your leg. >Your phone. >Taking it out, you turn on the screen. >A text message. >From your dad. >With your heart kicking up suddenly, you open the message. >'After you cash the check don't bother talking to us for a while. Thank your mother then handle your business.' >You stare at that message for a while. >Long enough to go through the rest of your cigarette and on to a new one. >Putting your phone on the counter, you open a Pabst and take a good long drink. >Through the wall, you can hear your neighbors start their yelling match. >There's the sound of glass breaking and a woman starts crying. >With your beer, you leave the kitchen and walk into the living room. >There's no light, save for the TV. >And Derby's crimson eyes. >She sits on the couch, smiling at the screen. >You walk down the hall and to your bathroom. >Closing the door, you turn on the light and take another drink of beer. >You catch a sight of yourself in the mirror. >It makes you turn away. >You get into the bathtub and sit down. >In one drink, you finish your beer. >Swallowing, you crush the can in one hand and throw it violently at the door. >It bounces off and slides across the linoleum.   >>32067555 >You pull your knees to your chest and hang your head between them with your eyes closed. >When is this going to stop? >You are twenty-seven. >When do things get better? "It's too late..." >The door to the bathroom opens. >You don't look up. >Derby walks into the bathroom and you know she is staring at you sitting in the bathtub. >Smiling. >You can hear the sound of her shifting around and a clicking noise. >Lifting your head slowly, you turn to her. >She stands smiling at you. >Using her wing like a hand, she points the TV remote at you and clicks it over and over. >Pressing 'play'. >Finally, you cry. >You sob like a baby, sitting in your bathtub with your knees pulled tightly to your chest. >"What is wrong with you, Anonymous? Derby doesn't know... What is wrong with you?"