>It’s a beautiful day, with clear skies and sunshine. >You’re sitting in the shade under a tree, writing in your book like usual. >Pausing, you look up from your book. >Would be nice if you could actually enjoy days like these. “Maybe someday...” >Going back to writing, you smell something delicious and look back up. >The moment you do, you freeze. >”Hey there, made some lunch, it’s your favorite. >Your mother is standing there wearing the same weary smile she does. >A smile grows over your face and you quickly get up to join her. >As you take a step forward, a sudden thud wakes you up, and you find yourself on the floor trapped in the blankets. >You slowly let out a groan. “Of course it was a dream...” >As you slowly untangle yourself, the dream is still fresh in your mind. >Feels like it was just yesterday when you were little and still living with your parents. >A stray tear rolls down your cheek and you wipe it away with your socked hoof. “Rather not remember again.” >Finally free from your prison, you put back the blankets and go to join your friends. >Yesterday was fun, despite the bullshit of the morning. >Today might actually be good. >’Yeah, who knows? Maybe you’ll trip and break your neck. Just what you wanted, a quick and painless death.’ >Shaking your head, you join Rest and Connie at the table. >You didn’t even bother to inspect your food, you just started eating. >>”I see your hungry, glad to see you eating more.” >Nodding, you don’t answer, just want to eat at the moment. >”Me and Connie were talking about where to go today, but we wanted to wait on you first.” >Of course they did, you take a quick drink and swallow. “I don’t really care where we go today, like I’ve said before. All that matters is that we hang out while we’re in the city. >They both smile. >At least you’re being more open with them. >>”Alright then, I figure we can visit some of the landmarks. I’d like to show you the concert hall I play in especially, they’re closed today, but that doesn’t I can’t show you it. Oh! And of course the famous Statue of Friendship.” >The what now? “Uh...What?” >Connie raises an eyebrow, but continues. >>”You know, that huge statue in the bay? That’s what is called. Was set up here a long time ago after the city got bigger.” >Oh yeah, that fuck huge statue, you almost forgot about that. >You focus back on eating and thinking as the two of them start to talk about the places. >Yesterday you realized you could use your injury as a temporary crutch if need be. >’That’s a terrible idea Eri and you know it.’ >Like I said, if need be. >’Come the fuck on, you WILL use it, there is no ‘need be’ at all.’ >Connie and Rest proved otherwise, so I don’t think so. >’Every heard of coincidences? Because that’s what that was.’ >Bullshit, they were right there and helped me. >’Alright, lets say that’s true. Did you forget that visiting these places will be like museum.’ >I… >’Exactly! It’s just a repeat of the other day.’ >Shoving the thought aside for now, you excuse yourself from the table and go get ready. >As you go to grab a different hoodie, your razor falls out and onto the floor. >Quickly you scoop it up to put it away, but pause. >In it’s reflection you see yourself. >You almost feel compelled to use it again. >’What’s another cut? You said you might need the pain after all...’ “I’ve already done it three times while I’ve been here, I don’t think I should.” >Shaking your head, you put it away finally and breath a sigh of relief. >You head into the bathroom and start up the tub. >While it fills, you undo the bandage and examine your wounds again. >The first one is healing nicely, the other two however, not so much. “Shit. Hope it’s not infected, that’s the last thing I need.” >Then again, you might be overreacting to this, it’s probably just dried blood. “Yeah...Just my imagination, that’s all.” >The seed of doubt has been planted and as you bathe, it keeps reminding you. >What if it is infected? >You will have to tell Rest of course. >She will be quite pissed off and Connie will probably feel like shit for letting you go through this. >Stopping, you place your head in your hooves and try to think this through. >However, no matter how much you try, you can’t think of a good solution. >Your anxiety rises with it as you dwell more on the idea. “Fuck, this so stupid. I just cut and didn’t bother to think for one damn second.” >Letting out a groan, you finish up and try to distract yourself. >Before you wrap up your leg, you reexamine it again to see if you’re wrong. >’You’d think from the amount of times you’ve cut yourself, that you’d be able to tell.’ “Shut up, I’m trying to focus.” >The water has cleaned it mostly, and you’re fairly certain it will be fine. >That doesn’t stop the thoughts from bothering you as bandage your leg. >’So how do you think you will ruin today Eri?’ >You try to ignore it and get your hoodie on before heading back into the bedroom. >’Ignore it all you want, but at the end of the day, thoughts like these NEVER go away. No matter what you’re so called friends tell you.’ >Gritting your teeth, you open up your book you got yesterday and try to distract yourself. >’Do you honestly think you can just hide yourself away in a book? That’s not how the real world works, you will have to face ponies again.’ >It’s getting harder to ignore the thoughts, though you keep trying anyways. >’You can never hide though, just like all those times when you were growing up. Remember when ponies called you a loser? How about a freak? How about-’ >Before the thoughts can continue, you quickly bite down on your bandaged leg. >The pain nearly overwhelms you, and you barely manage to contain your scream. >Tears pour freely from your eyes and you are shaking hard. >You’re nearly hyperventilating from all this pain. >Letting go, you try to bring yourself back under control. >Easier said than done, you grab one of the pillows and bury your face in it while you calm down. >Minutes pass and finally, you’re able to calm down enough. >Pulling away the pillow, you sniffle. “...F-fuck...T-that was...So fucking close.” >You raise your leg up and examine the bandage. >Unfortunately, there is some blood seeping through it. “Fantastic...” >You grab another roll of bandages from your suitcase and limp to the hallway. >However, when you reach the bathroom, you see the door is closed. >Great, Connie or Rest is in there, can’t risk them finding out. >Can’t wait out here forever though. >Heading back to the bedroom, you try to hide yourself the best you can while you change the bandage. >It’s not the best option, but it’s the only one you have at the moment. >Worst yet, the wounds are bleeding. “Idiot, didn’t have to bite down that hard.” >Hastily, you wrap it up. >It’s one of the worst pains you’ve felt in a long time. >Shakily, you raise and examine your work. “It will have to do.” >You try to put your weight on it and are awarded with pain. >You sharply inhale through clenched teeth and try to bare with it. >Body is shakily fairly bad and it’s making it hard to focus. >Limping over to your bed, you put back on the hoodie and sit down. >No doubt Connie or Rest will be getting ready soon. “Guess I’ll just sit here until they come for me...” >You lay back and let your mind wander again. >Can’t pull out of this today, not after what you told them this morning. >But it’s going to be incredible hard to hide your pain. >Rest will likely notice with her training. >Have to think of something, you can’t let them know, no matter what. >Wait. >That’s it, Connie likely has some pain killers in her medicine cabinet. >It will help with the pain, but not the limping though… >The door opens up and Rest trots in. >”Feeling alright? You didn’t come out like you usually do.” >Just fake it, not like she can read you from there. “I’m okay, felt like reading, Is it time to get ready?” >”Good to hear. Connie and I were a little worried, but yes, we are going to be leaving soon.” >You sit up and face her with a fake smile. “Alright then, I’m going to use the bathroom before we leave.” >She nods and trots over to her suitcase. >While she is busy with that, you try to quickly get to the bathroom without her noticing your limp. >Thankfully you reach it with no trouble and close the door behind you. >You open up the cabinet and search for pain killers. “Hmm...Nope...Nope...Here we go.” >Picking up a bottle of aspirin, you open it up and take a couple of pills. >You turn on the facet and drink some water to go with it. “Hopefully this works.” >It hits you that there is one flaw in your plan. >Those pills will take time to kick in. “Oh shit.” >You likely don’t have enough time for that. >Your anxiety starts to rise and you feel yourself panic. “Shit, shit, shit...What do I do?” >As your wrack your mind, you hear a knocking on the door. >>”Are you almost ready Eri?” “Uh, yeah! Just give me a few minutes.” >>”Okay, We’ll be waiting in the living room when you’re done.” >A few minutes? >That’s not enough… >Okay think of something genius! >There is no option, you will have to try to hide it. >Letting out a sigh, you flush the toilet and head out to meet your friends. “Lets get going.” >They both nod and you follow them. >Each step is painful, but you manage. >Just have to hang back and not draw attention to yourself. >Doesn’t make it easier. >Thankfully, you’re able to hide it quite well, even when getting into the taxi. >Along the way, Connie starts to beam. >>”First stop, the Manehattan Symphony Orchestra Hall.” >She looks so happy, place sounds nice. >>”Looking forward to my next concert, it will be coming up soon. Wish I could’ve gotten the time to get you both in.” >”Would’ve been nice to see you play live.” >All those ponies would’ve made it a nightmare for you. >>”The whole orchestra is amazing, we all put our best forth in each concert.” >As the two talk, you feel the pain in your leg start to dull. >Thank fuck, that means the pills are working. >Unfortunately it will return when you have to get around on hoof once more. >Yeah...Forgot about that. >That quickly comes to pass as the taxi stops. >Gulping down your fear, you carefully step out. >Pain flares up your leg, though not as bad as earlier. >Wincing, you slightly limp behind your friends. >Connie stops, and turns to face you both with a smile. >>”This is it! So, what do you think?” >”It’s lovely.” >It kinda reminds you of the museum, only less monolithic and more fancy. >The building is a nice shade of brown with many windows and lights adorning it. “Wow.” >Connie’s smile widens and leads your group around the building, listing off facts. >>”It’s broken up into three halls, the main one houses over two thousand seats! We usually perform there, but that’s not the best part. The acoustics in each hall are perfectly balanced. The opera house in Canterlot can’t even compete, but that doesn’t stop ponies from trying to tell me otherwise.” >Been a while since you’ve seen her this enthusiastic about something. >Kinda infectious as well, so you smile as she continues. >>”The whole building is five stories tall, and hosts over two hundred performances a season! Of course other musicians use the place, but even better, it hosts many programs for young artists!” >Seeing your friends talking like this, it’s kinda nice. >>”So that about sums that up, how about we visit the Statue of Friendship next?” >”Alright, ready Eri?” >You nod and the three of you depart once again. >Your group arrives at some docks nearby, looks like you have to take a boat to get to the statue. >>”I’ll get the tickets, be right back.” >As she leaves, Rest turns to you. >”How are you holding up?” >Other than the pain, pretty good. “I’m alright, looking forward to seeing the statue.” >She smiles and Connie returns to lead you three to the boat. >Unfortunately, it’s pretty cramped with ponies. >>”Sorry about this, but a lot ponies visit the island daily.” “I-it’s fine.” >Not really, you feel your anxiety start to rise. >Stop thinking about it, come on, for the love of Celestia, please… >The rocking of the boat doesn’t help either, and you start to feel sick. >For fucks sake, why now? >Thankfully, the trip to the island is short. >”You don’t look that well.” >Honestly, you think you might throw up. “Yeah...I don’t think the boat ride helped me any.” >”Think you can make it?” >Looking back to your two friends, you nod, you’ll do it for them. >Limping along, you try to enjoy this place, but it’s pretty damn hard. >The other two walk over to a very large plaque. >>”This says it was granted as a gift from Princess Celestia as a symbol of friendship.” >”Wow, I can see they put a lot of effort forth.” >Connie nods. >>”Yeah, it also says it took years to complete.” >Looks like some stallion built it to compensate for something. >Heh, not a bad joke. >You try to keep up with your friends, but you still feel sick and your leg hurts. >As you try to take another step forward, you accidentally trip and run into another pony. >>>”Hey! Watch where you’re going!” >Stumbling back, you try to recover, but fall flat on your rear. >Looking back up, you see a angry looking stallion. “S-sorry.” >>>”You better be sorry, you should be paying attention. What kind of moron are you?” >You feel yourself sink lower. “I-I...” >>”Hey, what is your problem?” >Turning, you see Connie coming over and Rest quickly tends to you. >”Are you okay?” “Yeah, guess I got sea sick, or something.” >You turn your attention to situation unfolding. >>>”-She needs to watch where she is going, that’s what.” >She glares at him and takes a step forward. >>”You think that gives you right to call her a moron? Who do you think you are?” >He takes a step back and tries to handle the situation, but Connie cuts him off with another step closer. >>”She said she was sorry, all you had to do was accept her apology and be on your way. Do you just go around doing this to other ponies who make a mistake?” >>>”I-uh-” >You can see other ponies looking on as the stallion starts to visibly sweat. >Connie gets even closer, causing him to shrink down. >She leans in close and whispers something to him >Can’t make out what it is, but his eyes widen. >>”Got it?” >He nods and quickly takes off. >She turns back to you both and smiles. >>”Sorry about that. Lets get you back to the apartment.” >You’d argue, but honestly, you feel a little afraid of her. >What the hell was that? >Rest helps you up and the three of you head back to the boat. >Thankfully the fall helps mask why you’re actually limping. >But the ride back is as bad as the ride to the island. >When you reach the shore, you take one step and immediately empty your stomach. >”Easy now, it’s okay Eri.” >As Rest rubs your back, you don’t just feel sick, you feel disappointed. >You only managed to visit the hall, and the island was a bust. >How is it everyday you’ve fucked something up? >What’s worse? >Tomorrow is your last day, it hurts to know that you’ve wasted this trip...