>that one prompt from before: >Ponies can understand Anon-words >Anon cannot understand horse-noises >You are Luna, herald of the night; protector of dreams; the face of darkness >You are also very bored. >Nopony's coming to your night court tonight. >It's been... three days since anypony had troubles that couldn't be solved during the day by your sister. >Not that you're complaining, though; you never really had the head for politics. >>"Ooh, my neighbour's tree branches stick out over my fence! Fix it!" >>"Wah! This mare's ancestors might have done something to MY ancestors! Throw her in the dungeon!" >Bucking peasants. >They were half the reason you turned dark a thousand years ago. >And they've only gotten worse. >At least back then, mares complained about blood-feuds and assassinations. >But one thing hasn't changed: your legion of tight-flanked colt-filled Royal Guards. >MMM! >At least your nights aren't a total waste, knowwhatimsayin'? >"Oh! Oh, well aren't YOU just the prettiest little thing?" >What the Moon is that thing. >A bipedal creatures is stalking towards you. >Strangely enough, he has a look of utter delight on his face. >Not an expression you're used to being on the business end of. "Halt, creature! State thy business!" >"Aww, somebody's a grumpster! Is it you? Is it?" >....is this thing mentally challenged? "Is this how you address your Princess? Guards, how did it even get in here?" >"Oh gosh, you look so soft and pretty. I wanna pet you!" >What. >NOPONY pets the royal fur! >Y-you're saving the Royal Tuft for your special somepony... [spoiler]>Your shy, meek, perfect horsebando...[/spoiler] >You stand up off of your throne and begin to back away. >Your morality prevents you from harming this confused colt, but you're running out of space behind you. >"Get back here, you big muffin! I'm gonna getcha! I'm gonna getcha!" >Oh Moon, is this what rape feels like? >You're so distracted by your imminent rape that you fail to notice that this rape-monster has closed the distance between the two of you. >With a yelp, he sits down and drags you onto his lap and lays you down on your back. >"Ohh, you're so soft. How did you get so soft?" >You want to answer him but you can't reveal your daily morning private spa treatment! >That shit's for COLTS! "G-guards! Guards, apprehend this creature! I need an adult!" >Your guards flood the room, looking around for a threat as best as their admittedly sub-par training has shown them. >Damn your decision to fill your ranks with eye-candy! >One of your guards spots your predicament and gasps loudly >>"Oh my Celestia, is that the cuddle-monster?" >Another one titters and does a little dance in place. >>"Oh, I LOVE that colt! He gives the BEST belly rubs!" >O-oh, my. >Colt-on-colt bellyrubbing? [spoiler]>That's so lewd![/spoiler] "Guards, get this thing off of me right now!" >But you are ignored. >Your guards talk amongst themselves about their meet-ups with his large monster. >Meanwhile, said creature is giving your tummy tum-tums slow rubs, and he's talking to you like you were a foal. >"You're my little cutie-patootie and I'll love you forever." >... "R-really?" [spoiler]>Is this what love feels like?[/spoiler] >Maybe you were a bit hasty trying to get this thing off of you. -------------------- >....the buck is your sister at? >You are Celestia, and Luna isn't eating her breakfast-slash-dinner with you this morning. >You're having pancakes this morning, and your chubby little sister normally can't resist stuffing her face with them. >You suspect that something is a-hoof. >With poise and grace and all that bullshit, you walk through the halls of your venerable castle, opulent and imperial. >As you approach your sister's bedroom door, the sounds of muffled rap music grows louder. >...no, you were wrong. >That's FUNK music. >What is that that stomping you hear? >Is Luna dancing? >Oh goodness, you HAVE to see this. >Without any consideration for you sister's privacy, you open the door just a crack and poke your muzzle in. >"MACHO MACHO MARE" >Yes. >"I'VE GOT TO BE! A MACHO MARE!" >Yes! >"I'VE GOT TO BE A MACHO MACHO MARE!" >Mon Dieu! >"I'VE GO TO BE A MACHO~" >You are Luna. >You think you've maybe misjudged this gentle creature. >Sure, he was a little bit rough at first. >And sure, he didn't really consider anything you were saying to him.... >He basically did what he wanted with you and didn't even listen when you told him to stop. >That part was actually kind of hot. >You've learned something new about yourself today. >You like to think that you're good friends with him now. >Maybe even more than friends. >Dare you say it? >The most forbidden of special friends? >.... >Cuddle buddies. >If his babbling and half-mad promises are anything to go by, you think he's probably going to find a bedroom and just starting living here in this castle with you. >This is okay with you. >Because you NEVER get to have as much fun with ANYPONY as you are now! >You've invited him into your bedroom (NOT because you thought he might see your bed and decide to lay down and snuggle the Royal Tuft) and one thing lead to another... >The two of you are dancing to what was THE hottest song back before you were grounded and sent to your moon. >He's got your fore-hooves in his gentle grip, forcing you to stand up and balance on your hind legs. >This is the most fun you've had in CENTURIES. ------------------------- April 26, 2016: >You are Cadence, and you regret staffing your royal guard with mares. >How were you supposed to know that mares were the stallions of the world a thousand years ago?! >You've found three of them already asleep, and you know that it's only a matter of time, now. >He's here. >You don't know how, but he's here. >But you are a princess, dammit! You won't be beat by a colt! >You're going to make your last stand in the most secure room in the palace: your bedroom. >With Shining on your heels, you sprint through the crystal halls, adrenaline amplifying each and every sound echoing through your castle. "J-just a few *huff* more halls, Sh-shiny." >.... >....how long has it been since you've heard him complaining about ruining his hooficure? >You're suddenly aware that you've only been able to hear one set of hoof-steps for the last minute or two; that of your own. >You skid to a stop and spin around to look behind you. >He's gone. >No. >Please, Celestia, no. >You almost lost him at the wedding; you can't lose him now. >Not again. >>"Rock-a-by baby, on the tree-top..." >Your heart skips a beat. >>"When the wind blows, the cradle will rock..." >You taken an involuntary step backwards, away from the new voice. >>"When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall..." >A figure steps around the corner, bipedal and green. Your husband is asleep in his arms. >He.... he looks so comfortable and content. >Who would DO that to a colt?! >>"And down will fall baby, cradle and all..." >You think you just peed yourself a little.