>Week time sure flys in horseland
>be Anontonio, embracer of night and master of Zs
>fiery rays of luminescent hell peek through a crack in the makeshift blinds and over your closed eyelids
>you instinctively rustle under the covers of your bed, clenching fabric with your teeth to keep you in the sweet embrace of darkness
>the song-birds chirps slowly lull you back to sleep almost as if a lullaby was constantly played for you
>you feel like you don't have a worry in the world
>there is no need to go to work
>there is no chores to be done or expenses paid
>there are no crazy magic talking horses trying to make you do crazy magic horse things
>there is only sleep
>there is only pace
>it is a peaceful respite for you-
>pat pat pat pat
>you feel a familiar light stomp-like tapping over you from beyond the covers
"N-nnon, Mama!? Ancora cinque m-minuti.."
>you plead in your muffled voice as curl up tighter rejecting what the outside world could offer over your little shade of heaven
>"DIRIRING-A-DRING-A-RING-A-DRING---GRING"
>your hoof instantly pokes out of the covers and makes contact with the alarm clock with the force and strength of a thousand spicy gnocchi
>you hear a muffled dinging sound in the distance and the tapping weight that was on you seems to have gone
>excellent, back to your peaceful state of quiet rest and relaxation
>the weight suddenly returns and so does that awful ringing
>"DRING-A-RING-A!"
>you release your fore-hoof again in hopes to silence the invading mechanical abomination to your fortress of blissful ignorance, but the weight bounced to another spot over you out of its reach
>"BLING-A-BLING-A!"
>you release your other fore-hoof in attempt to knock it of off, but the weight just hopped out of your reach once more as if taunting you
>you groan in annoyance and begin simply flailing about underneath the covers
>you swung your head, kicked with your hooves, flapped with your wings, whipped your tail, tossed and turned
>but despite your thrashing, your efforts never succeeded in knocking away the alarm as it kept dodging your limbs
>you've had enough of this merda
"O-okaaay, who-a dares wake da lupo!"
>you begrudgingly toss the covers off you and stand ready to face the sorry birichino who woke you from your peaceful slumber
>before you stands the one Fluttershy called "Angel Bunny" with a smug, almost pleased look on his stupid little bobble head face over your reaction and all while tapping at the clock with his paw
>this rabbit was no "Angel" to you, if anything the opposite, you'd bet that if ass-face didn't exist that this bunny is Lucifer itself
>you calmed your emotions for a moment and eyed in the general direction of the clock
>it showed no lines or numbers, just a large arrow and small arrow indicating that it should be around 10:30 if it's anything similar to earth hours
>you don't know how time zones work in magical talking horse world
"Ay see, I overrslept did-en't ayy.."
>you turn around and stretch your legs as Devil bunny looks at you with a puzzled expression as if expecting an entirely different reaction from you and is contemplating how well you're taking this
>AND HE'S RIGHT TO
>as if getting ready to pounce you slowly turn your neck to bring you face to face the meat
>your half closed eyes bloodshot and with a rage filled gaze, your large cartoon pupil twinkled with mischievous intent, if you had any veins in your forehead, they'd most definitely be shown pumping now and you muzzle giving a sly grin just large enough to show the tips of your canines
"DON BREAK-A MY BALLS BUNNY!!"
>the meat begins to turn around expecting a chase
>but that wasn't your intent
>with your fore hooves already in firm position, you buck with all your pent up Italian rage and send Angel flying along with the held alarm clock
>"eeeeeeeeeeeee"
"I WAKE-A UP WHEN AYY WAND TO PORCO DIAVOLO!!"
>"eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee--"
>Angel flew into the blinds and smashes through the window with a crash
>GOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAALLLLLL-
>solar rays of immense burning discomfort washes over your once giddy face
>your pupils immediately construct, you instinctively turn your head away and cover your vision with a hoof full of shade while hissing in displeasure
>you bet that magic pony "princess" with that fat sunny ass is behind this
>somewhere in magic horse land an Alicon Princess sitting on her throne while going about her daily court duties sneezes
>"A-anon, is everything alright?"
>well, there is no point in going back to sleep now
>you stretch on the bed and give out a long yawn as Fluttershy enter the living room
>she gives you a concerned look
>"O-oh I knew, I heard something.. Anontonio, I was worried you'd overslept. You're going to be late for your first day of school!"
>school?
>catzo, do you really need horse education? You've already graduated
>Fluttershy eyes go wide over the broken window next to you
>"When did this happen, was it always broken?"
>you reply with another disinterested yawn and half closed eyes
>Fluttershy frowns as she observes some glass fragments on the floor
>"I guess I'll have to stop by Applejack's kiosk and ask if she can patch this up later. I wouldn't want anypony catching a cold."
>she begins backpeddling and sweeping the debris into a corner with her tail
>neat, but you wouldn't want glass in your hair
>"Have seen Angel? I'm positive that I've asked him to wake in case you overslept."
>the bunny? That little devil's could be spending the day picking "carrots" out of from his culo for all you care
"Angel? Si, I'mma looking right at her-a."
>you say, facing Fluttershy with a smug grin
>Fluttershy's wings rustled and she seemed flustered for a moment
>"Anontonio, we had this talk already. I told you to call me Fluttershy or miss Fluttershy, not angel horse."
>10outta10, question averted
"Si, si. Whadevar you say-a miss angel horse."
>Flittershy frowned
>"Also remember what Princess Celestia told you, We are ponies, not horses."
>You also remember asking if ponies have free speech under her rule, which is a yes and it also helps that everyone thinks you're a child despite your protests.
>Not that you care much about Sunbutt's rule anyways, the only thing she's done for you was get Assface temporarely off your back and force you to agree to a set of conditions to find you a suitable foster home.
>what's that?
>you wish to recall the specific details of your agreement with the horse sun goddess?
>too bad, you're too tired for such deep thinking
>perhaps if the subject ever gets brought up, you'll think about it
>Fluttershy stops what she's doing and approaches you smiling with dreamy eyes
>oh merda, why the sudden change of tune
>from your experience, when Italian women suddenly change tune towards this quickly it's usually a sign of them having a cunning idea or you're in for some sort of wooping
>you hope mares are different
>you feel uneasy and lean back away from her
>"Anontonio."
>she says as she comes closer to you with now dreamy eyes you do not feel comfortable receiving while on a bed
>this is some kind of next level mental horse hypnosis, you can tell
"Seeing as you'll be late anyways, why don't you get ready for school while I clean this up so we can go together?"
>what, together?
>but you don't want to go
>you want to sleep somewhere shady
"Whad? Why can't ay just go by myselfa!"
>"Well um, seeing you always sleep in gives me the impression that you'll just get lost and fall asleep somewhere."
>you cringe from her realization
>this horse
>this horse right here
>you've lived with her for about a week and she already knows you too well
"Do ayy hav to? I'm a-a foreignerr. Besides, ay hav gotten diploma already ay sweara!"
>you begged not to go, at least you think you did with your new pegasus body by lowering your head and keeping your forhooves together
>Fluttershy frowned again upon finding out her intuition was correct and gave you a stern stare
>catzo
>your gaze was frozen, facing hers
>you were right to assume this was some sort of mind game
>"Anon!"
>she said in a more assertive and commanding tone
>you gulp, still frozen in the siren's trance
>"Even if I believed that were the case, I happen to know that even colts in Itaily go to schools until they graduate as productive stallions for society."
>that's right, you've been told by Celestia that there is a continent to the east of Equestria with a country named Itaily in the middle of an inland sea known as the Mareditermaneian with the capital of Roam that speak your native language
>with added horse puns of course
Just thinking up these, drove me crazy.
>"Besides."
>Fluttershy picks you up off the bed with her forehooves and drops you gently standing on your 4 hooves onto the floor
>"You'll learn to read and write an, ohh, oh of course, you'll make friends and play with many other colts and fillies of your age!"
>she says with a more excitable tone
"Ayy'm an adul-"
>"DOSEN'T THAT SOUND LIKE FUN?!"
>she cuts off your retort and beams at you with a wide smile
>shaken, you groan and just accept your fate
"F-fine, ayyy'll a-go get ready..."
>a victorious squee, rubber duck-like noise can be heard coming from her as you turned around and choose not to question it
>you make your way towards and up the stairs one by one
>once you've reached the peak you take a left, enter the washroom and slam the door shut behind you to vent some frustration
>you patter into the shower booth, close the curtains behind you and boop the shower lever on
>yes magic horses have plumbing and showers
>it's very cold mind you
>shivering from initial contact, you'd think you we're covered in wet snow on the alps or something
>still it's not all bad, you've always liked to keep your self groomed and looking your best for any occasion
>probably your fault anyways since you've woken up so late and all the warm water was used
>you try to ignore it with some singing
"Lasciatemi cantare~"
>you let the water pour over you evenly as you twirl in a circle in your happy tune
"Con la chitarra in mano~"
>Dio mio, do you sure miss you hands
"Lasciatemi cantare
una canzone piano, piano.."
>feeling your coat sufficiently soggy and your mane rinsed you stand on your rear legs to be able to reach a shampoo bottle on the counter
"Lasciatemi cantare~"
>you clamp your fore-hooves together to clutch the bottle and let the shampoo splurge onto your mane, back and tail
>you've only been here for about 2 weeks and you've already realized how much you took your figure and arms for granted living the life of a stubby little horse for daily mundane things like being able to brush your teeth
>you drop the bottle and slowly but methodically scrub yourself clean one hoof at a time
"Perche ne sono fiero!"
>you stand on your rear legs again to see what else you can use from the counter and notice your nemesis
>a bar of soap
>you narrow your eyes in determination
>...
>be lucifer himself
>no you mean rabbit ragu
>BE ANGEL BUNNY
>you're certain you've spent too much time living with Anontonio
>you tolerated that blasted little wop for too long
>not that you were trying...
>BUT STILL!
>this be YOUR cottage
>Fluttershy be YOUR caretaker
>THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE FAVORITE
>and you're certain you still have some glass shards lodged in your furry little tush
>oh, but your suffering ends today
>OHHHH YES, you've got a carrot with you
>no, not just any carrot
>you've sharpened this carrot with all your lust for revenge, so you're certain it's pointy enough to impale that marshmallow
>THAT'S RIGHT YOU'RE GONNA STAB HIM WITH IT!
>you can listen to him sing the song of his people in the shower from outside the cottage
>good he's distracted, it will be the last tune he chirps
>you hop onto the second floor ledge and as silently as you can open the bathroom port window. Tip toe inside on your paws, and close it behind you.
>wouldn't want anypony important to hear the deed as anything other then horrid singing
>you stealthly leap down onto the washroom floor under the ambiance of the running shower water and slowly inch your way closer to the shower's curtains like some kind of a ninja
>a ninja turtle
>who says bunny's can't be slow and steady when assassinating an unsuspecting foal
>NOT YOU THAT'S WHO
>"Perche ne sono fiero!"
>you're now close enough to see your shadow on the curtains
>fortunately for you your prey has currently turned his back towards you and is preoccupied with the contents of the counter
>you grin and maliciously drool at the perfect opportunity before you
>standing on your back legs you carefully open the curtain entrance to the side with your left paw and slowly raise your right paw wielding the carrot in preparation for the stabbing
>THIS IS IT!
>"Sono un Italiaaaaa-NNOOOOOOOOOONNNN!?!!"
>...
>be Anontonio
>you recoil back, flutter your wings and scramble your fore-hooves
>that damned soap bar just won't stay in your grasp
>trying to clench it with both hooves, it slips out of your clutches as you attempt to stop juggling it around
>and there's no way in hell you're going to use your mouth
"MA VAFFANCULO SAPONE E CHE TI HA FATTO!"
>even IF you acknowledge being a potty-mouth
>getting impatient you attempt to catch it with a clamping motion of both your wings in front of you
>instead this sends you reeling back onto your plot and launches the soap at incredible speed as it continuously ricochets about in the shower
>you duck and cover your eyes as the ballistic soap misses your head by a hair
>"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
>you hear a crash and then quiet
>you lift your head and notice the soap is gone
>w-well, it's not like you wanted to smell your b-best anyways!
>Stupid slippery soap bars and stupid hooves...
>not that you expected your wings to emit that much force either
>you swear that soap bar had the velocity of a bloody cannon shell or something
>it could of killed you
"Un... Italiano.. Vero."
>you finish your little tune, panting and boop the shower water lever off
>you exit the shower to dry yourself and step on what seems to be a carrot
>you ponder for a moment, why would Angel horse have a peeled carrot on the washroom floor
>a sudden thought comes to you and you blush
>oh, OH!
>you quickly look for something else, not wanting to think further on magic talking horse anatomy
>you notice the washroom window is busted
>you assume the ballistic soap is perhaps miles away by now
>you sigh and finish drying yourself, also you succeeded to manually comb your mane back with your wings while it's still wet
>you would kill for some hands and hair gel right about now
>"Come on down Anon, I've got your saddlebag ready!"
>you groan, remembering that you still have to go to magic horse elementary school today
"Si, si, ayy'm on da wayy!"
>you exit the washroom and make your way down
>Angel horse was already waiting for you by the exit next to what seemed a white double sided knapsack abomination
>wait, you notice she was wearing something similar too on her back
>"Come on over here Anon, so I can put this saddlebag on you back and we can get going."
"Do ayy really hav' to wear ZAT!?"
>you point in disgust towards the knapsack abomination
>Fluttershy scowls disapproving at your snobbish attitude and sternly stares towards you
>"Yes, every young colt and filly wears a saddlebag to school and so will you mister."
"Ok, ok, I get it! I'll wear zis abominio difettoso!"
>you groan and make you way to Fluttershy and let her strap the saddlebag onto you back, just behind your wings
>great
>now you were not only a horse, but a working horse only a week after mastering walking
>...
>like a horse
>not that the weight was too much for you and it surprisingly fit your marshmallow pony anatomy well
>"Oh, it's only been about a week and already you look like a colt ready to be sent off for your first day of school, I'm so proud!"
>n-not that you'll ever admit it tho
>you've got your own pride
>Fluttershy motioned you to exit while keeping while covering her expression with one hoof in what can only now be described as a happy yet close to sobby state
>as you exit you avert your gaze for a moment to your old Vespa leaning on the porch
"So-a, 'ow long befor we arrive?"
>"Ponyville is only a good 10 minute trot away, but knowing you're pace it'll take 20 minutes. Oh I know, how about a race? I'm not the fastest pony around. Betch'ya can beat be if you just try!"
>wow, Angel horse REALLY wants to see you get excited for this
>however you don't share her enthusiasm or care
>you've already had your share of schooling growing up back on earth
>besides
"If ayy'm going to be late anyways, ayy may as well be fashionably late and..."
>you sigh then momentarily point back towards the Vespa for Fluttershy as you pace with her
"If I could be able to ride that oversized scooter in mai current state, ayy'd be able to get zere in less zan 5 minutes presto!"
>bushes suddenly rustled behind you along your path but dismissed it as merely one of Fluttershy's many wild pets going about their business
>"Oh, well I'm sure you'll be happy to know that once you learn to fly that you'll be able to match speed in no time."
>Angel horse's adamant cheery attempts to suggest to you to always look towards the future positively has left a modest but tiny smile on you
>you try your best to be less argumentative with her untill you reach Ponyville
"So-a, what's in mai saddlebag?"
>"School supplies, a pair of textbooks, a pair of bits and the lunch I prepared for you."
>you turn your neck around enough momentarily to sniff at your saddlebag but don't find any distinct smell other then that of text book
"What's for lunch?"
>"Oh, my specialty. Cucumber and daisy sandwiches!"
>You turn your head away from here and gag in disgust
"I zink ayy'd be able to find more taste in an English muffin."
>you mutter
"What was that?"
>not currently wanting to argue with your caretaker about obviously inferior horse "food", you quickly change subject
"Sooo, ey tell me about-a your first day in school."
>"I-if your really want to know. I mean, it was so long ago."
"Si, ayy do."
>you really don't
>"Well, when I was a little filly the first thing that happened that morning after waking up was opening my window completely to be greeted by the sun and darling birds blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah..."
>this is going to be a long 10 minutes
>...
>you seem to be closer to the Ponyville's center some 15 minutes later
>pacing behind a babbling Fluttershy, completely oblivious to your disregard of her times at school
>the trip wasn't all fruitless to you however
>you've discovered a use for your wings
>using the tips as ear plugs, it helped you drown out this mare's voice
>not that Fluttershy has ever caught your disinterest
>whenever she looked back to make sure you kept up, you feigned whistling a tune, playing innocent and answering with the occasional "Si si." or "Oh really?"
>she seemed to be fairly excited to share her experience
>you almost feel bad for her
>almost
>she suddenly turns to face an off-guard you with a cheerful smile and proclaims
>"We've arrived!"
>you sweat as you quickly put on an act of you cleaning out your ears with your wings for a moment
>"Uhm Anontonio, are you listening?"
"Ehh, si si! Ayy was just cleaning out my ears-a, I zink some wader remain from showering."
>you take a look around you avoiding the conversation further
>you're now standing in what seems to be a market square, bustling with ponies of all kinds and colors going about their day
>you can even distinguish some of the goods on sale despite their alien yet simple pastel colored shapes
>you see baked good stands, kitchen appliance stands, tool stands, fruits and vegetable stands as far as your oversized horse eyes can see
>"Anon? Anontonio, this is your first time at the marketplace isn't it."
"Si, ayy guess."
>Fluttershy points a fore-hoof towards an apple stand-wagon with a familiar orange mare wearing a cowboy hat pitching to sell apples
>"I'll be over there talking with Applejack for a moment, I know how excited you are to see Ponyville but you've still got to go to school. I'll let you explore the market place but stay close to the market square within my line of sight, ok?"
"Va bene, ayy'll look around."
>you nod and trot towards a more opening in the market yet still in the limits Angel horse's sight
>you trot up to a cherry stand with a stern looking tan pegasus stallion wearing a cap and bow-tie manning it
"Ughh ciao, do you sell cherrys?"
>"Yes we do lil' colt! I saw you walkin up 'ere, eyeing the goods. Why, tell me is that yellow pegasus mare waving over there your mommy?"
>you turn momentarily and see Fluttershy waving mid conversation with the apple mare in acknowledgement of your position
"Non non, she's actually my legal guardian-"
>"Oh, have I got a special offer for you little colt!"
>the tan stallion cuts you off, pulls your head closer with his hoof and with a sly grin begins whispering in your ear
>"Just for you, a special price! I'll sell a half-dozen cherries for a measly, oh I dunno 30 bits."
>he then lets you go, expectantly waiting for a reply
>"Well, waddya say colt?"
>you rub the back of your head in annoyance
>this confuses you, yet at the same time you have a gut feeling that something wasn't quite right here
"Bitz? What are zese bitz you speak of?"
>the stallion groans and rolls his eyes at you
>"Figures HER colt wouldn't even know about bits."
>he mutters ignorant of you
>"Ugh I just realized we don't serve foals, please come back when you've got bits with you."
>you scowl as the stallion shoos you away dismissively
>rude
>it's not your fault you don't know magic horse land customs
>you didn't even WANT to taste an alien pastel colored cherry
>I-idiota!
>you move along to the next stand with a big and dumb looking stallion with a scruffy mane manning it
"Whad do you sell 'ere?"
>the stallion answer with a goofy yet bluntly honest tone
>"Screws and screw accessories."
"Zat it?"
>"Yep, just about. We got some nails and hammers inna back too."
>you never would of guessed this horse with a screw loose seriously makes a living selling screws and nails at a stand
>you immediately remember the busted windows back at Fluttershy's cottage
"You know~"
>you point at Fluttershy and the apple mare with a hood
"I zink zose ponies over zere may be in need-a of some nails. You should ask zem!"
>"Gee, thanks colt! I'll go do that!"
>you watch the stallion leave his stall unattended and trek towards the mares
>wow, he's really trusting of you
>you observe the vulnerable goods of the stall but find nothing of real interest to you
>figures there's nothing you could even use except for maybe a hammer
>not that you'd take it anyways
>you're not grabbing anything with your horse mouth
>you aren't some dirty animal peasant
>you've been spoon-fed soup like a king for over a week already by Angel horse!
>the soup could be better though
>you don't think you could go another week "tolerating" tomato soup
>just because you have canines doesn't make you a vampire
>or does it
>you realize you still know very little of your current horse biology
>perhaps going to school won't be so bad
>perhaps you'll also be able to educate the uncultured horses on minestrone and cream soups in the near future
>you move on to the next stand
"Whad do you sell?"
>a unicorn mare with a bun mane and board expression answer with a sarcastic and grainy tone
>"What's it look like I'm selling!"
>you observe the stall and see nothing but rows of brooms, brooms for days
"Brooms?
>"Brooms, wanna buy!"
"For whad are they magic? Canna I ride on zem and fly like a strega or somezing?"
>"No that's silly, they sweep. You got any bits!"
>well EXCUSE ME how are you supposed to know magic horse land doesn't have magic brooms
"Whad are bitz!?"
>"Look colt!" she says in a coarse tone "You're wasting my time. If you're a foreigner that hasn't got any bits, then scram!"
>you're angry
>you don't have to take this from this puttana
"FINE!"
>you shout in a quaking tone, a third of the market's eyes on you and they all probably heard you
>the mare before you visibly wide eyed and shocked
"AN WHILE YOUR-A AT IT, VATTENE A SCOPARE WIZ YOUR BROOM, FICA!"
>you stomp away angrily, leaving the shaking cunt hiding behind her stall
>you have half a mind to get that hammer and just to whack some respect into her
>you didn't expect to find so many stronzos in magic horse land besides donkey face
>"Ey colt, non e bello a parlare di altri in quello modo, lo sai?"
>a taunting yet cheery, girly voice calls out to you before a momentary giggle
>your eyes go wide and you stop moving, trying to register what you've just heard spoken
>did some PONY just call out to you in your native language!?!
>"Ey colt, chi ti ha insegnato a usare quelle parole cattive?"
>another girly voice calls out to you, this one more reserved and cautious
>you begin to turn your attention to the source of the voices

Continues in Adventures of Anontonio Day 11b: http://pastebin.com/bFE4WWXM

I'm going to add music or theme references and translations at the bottom from now on:

Shower L'Italiano song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVHvaKo15Pw
Angel Bunny's Shower perspective: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Me-VhC9ieh0

Line # & word translation, Italian to English:

15: No mom, another 5 minutes.
merda = shit/poop/crap
lupo = wolf
birichino = little imp/mischievous/troublesome
porco diavolo = swine devil/dastardly pig
catzo = cock
ragu = a ground up meat sauce used often with pasta
188: Go fuck yourself soap as well as whom ever made you.
abomnio = abomination
difettoso = defective
Vespa = a two stroked engine, seated and aluminum scooter made in Italy.
Va bene = very well/ok/all good/everything's fine
idiota = idiot
strega = witch
puttana = whore
minestrone = An Italian soup involving stock, vegetables and sometimes pasta
356:And while you're at it why don't you go sweep with your broom, cunt! (In Italian to sweep also means to fuck. So Anontonio is telling the broom mare to go fuck herself with her broom.)
360: Ey colt, it's not nice to talk about others in that way/fashion, you know?
364: Ey colt, who taught you to use such bad words/language?