> 17. - Ponyville Part 1 >
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Anonymous found himself swimming in a sea of splendor, much like a minnow who
had wandered into a group of hungry jellyfish. The festive and lively atmosphere
of the Gala had little water involved, except for the way the drinks had been
diluted. All around him stood ponies of renown and poise; ponies who moved the
world and who enriched it with their very presence. Large fish in a very large
pond, Elegance and refinement to the highest degree swept around him, and it was
clear the guests took great pride in their satin gowns, silk ties, well-trimmed
and perfectly coiffed manes and feathered hats.

For a young man from Salt Lick, Anonymous felt horribly out of place. Armed with
nothing more than his Celestial Crystal and his suit, he shimmied his way among
and around the crowd, trying to figure out his place within it and his purpose
for being there. He might as well have been invisible; no pony met his eyes or
offered a word of greeting. All of the attendees were only interested in
themselves and the company they were presently with. What was he supposed to do?
Why was he here?

Somehow he felt his heart tug in a particular direction, and he followed the
prompting for a moment until he found a opening on the floor.

It was there, on a dais that extended a good ten feet into the air, that he
found the immortal and exquisite Princess of the Sun. Radiance and beauty flowed
off of her in waves that mimicked her mane and tail, and he could feel serenity
and balance from simply being in her presence. She stood, though there was a
gilded throne behind her, and she observed the proceedings of the party with
poise, grace, wisdom, and tact, but Anonymous felt an undercurrent of sorrow
relentlessly pull him toward her.

Eager to see if he could assist the fair Matron of Equestria, Anon began to
navigate through the crowd again. The partygoers made the task difficult for
him; the closer he got to her position the more ponies stood in the way. The
words they were speaking drifted by as he moved, but they were empty and hollow
to him. Those closer to her were abundant in praise but lacking in substance,
and though he found that irksome he doggedly pressed on.

After some effort, he reached the base of the dais and he looked up the narrow
stairs to her. He saw no guards nor obstacles in between them, so he began to
climb with zeal.

Halfway up, though, his resolve faltered for a moment. Was he allowed up there?
What would she think of him? Would he be called impertinent, over eager? Would
she cast him aside, banish him from her presence because of his naivety and
insolence?

He shook the thoughts from his head and began again to climb. Come what may, he
had to reach her. For some odd reason, he felt like he was the only one who
could.

He was most pleased to find that Celestia not only had a smile for him once he
reached her, but a soft nose boop as well. He gave her a quick bow and then
beamed up at her.

“Hello, my Princess. Might I be bold enough to ask to speak with you?”

“Yes, but on one condition.”

He tilted his head and gave her a curious look.

“Don’t ever bow to me again,” she said in a kind but stern tone. “We are equals,
and I expect to be treated as such.”

“Fair enough.” He chuckled. “What party is this?”

“I’m not sure, but it doesn’t really matter,” she sighed, as he moved to stand
next to her. “Over the years I’ve found there’s very little difference between
an Officer’s Ball, the Grand Galloping Gala, or any other formal ball you could
name. All of their Balls look alike, with a minor variation here and there.”

He looked over the crowd with her. “And you never get to participate.”

“I am the Princess, so thus I am the Master of all Ceremonies. I am not a
participant in the festivities; I am simply here to observe, and to be observed
in return. See how they are now? They want to be near me, but they don’t want to
actually know me. It’s far better for their own personal prospects to simply
claim closeness. Getting to know me would require more time and effort than they
want to invest.”

“But I am here,” Anon noted.

“And I am most grateful you are.” She smiled brightly again. “You are one of the
few who has made the climb to me. But now that you have, will you go back down
to the crowd and boast of your accomplishment?”

Anon noticed the stairway down was now unbelievably wide, and moving. All he had
to do was step on the first step and he would be automatically taken to the
bottom with no effort needed. He would then be in the midst of a sizeable crowd,
and they seemed eager to talk to him now. Doubtless they would ask about the
Princess, but he somehow knew they only wanted the information to help
themselves.

“No.” His answer came quickly. “I will remain here with you. A minute in your
company is better than a day with them.”

“Good answer.” She booped him again. “So, what should we talk about now?”

“How about we talk about your favorite pie?”

“Really? You want to know that?”

“I can’t bake one for you if I don’t know what it is.”

“Rhubarb pie,” she happily declared. “I don’t know when I started liking them
but there’s nothing better than that.”

“And how much sugar do you have put in them?”

“Oh, only four or five cups usually.”

“You have a serious sugar issue.”

“Better than salt.”

And from behind a pillar in the back corner, Luna smiled as the two laughed.
“Enjoy this dream, dear sister, and may you have many more with him like this.”

And then she quietly slipped away.





Anon awoke shortly before dawn that morning but had no idea why. He was warm and
comfortably snuggled into Celestia’s silky side, and her wing was wrapped snugly
over and around him so there was no reason to be up. She was breathing softly
and evenly through her nose, and the soft smile on her lips indicated she was
quite content as well.

He simply laid there and soaked in her warmth and serenity for a few moments,
but then a question came to him. It was one that had drifted through head once
or twice before, and one that many ponies before him had asked:

Was Celestia’s mane made of hair or something else?

It seemed like it was made of hair. Slowly, he reached one hand out, and he
oh-so-delicately touched near her ears.

“It’s hair,” she said softly, and her sleeping smile grew bigger.

“Do you blame me for wondering?”

“It’s one of the most frequent questions I get,” she replied. “I’ve heard some
pretty wild theories on what other material it might be.”

“So why does it float and wave?”

“Magic,” she succinctly stated.

“Har har.”

“Hair, hair. Seriously.” She opened her eyes and looked at him. “It takes a lot
of magic to move the sun or the moon. The ethereal nature of my mane comes from
the amount of magic that I possess. Luna has just as much as I do.”

“So Twilight and Cadance have less than you?”

“For now. Eventually, their power will grow and the same thing will happen, but
it will take some time. Even once they cross that unknown threshold, it will
take about three months or so for it to manifest in their manes.”

“Huh. That’s kinda interesting.”

A brush then floated into view, and Anon gently took it in hand.

“Would you like to help me brush it?”

“I do believe I would.” He smiled, and her wing retracted to allow him to stand.
Anon then stood and began brushing near the end of her mane while Celestia
closed her eyes again and sighed in contentment.

“You like this?” he asked.

“It’s relaxing.”

He kept the brushstrokes even, soft, and slow, and he found that even he felt
soothed and relaxed with the motions. It only took him a few minutes to finish,
but when he did he quickly put the brush aside and popped his hands onto her
back in between her wings.

“What are you… oooh!” she let out a squeal of delight as he began rubbing. Both
wings flared out and then lay flat on the floor as he kept going, and after a
minute or so Anon snickered a little.

“You purr?”

She purred a little louder to answer his question affirmatively. “You may keep
doing this for as long as you like.”

“Don’t you need to raise the sun?”

She replied with another groan of pleasure. “It can wait. Or Luna can bring it
up.”

“Won’t she break out into hives?”

“Meh. She’ll live.”

Anon, however, didn’t think Luna would appreciate that very much, so he stopped
and returned his hands to his sides. Celestia pouted as she pulled her wings
back in, but then she booped him softly.

“That was nice, thank you. I shall name you the official royal masseuse.”

“Only for you though.”

She smiled more. “I like that. But you are right, I should raise the sun. Then
we can have breakfast before you head out to Ponyville.”

“Sounds good.”





Anon breathed in deeply as the clouds dodged and rushed by him. He was in one of
Celestia’s carriages but with Shining Armor and Cadence instead of her, and he
felt very lonesome despite the company. He had been secretly hoping that she
would drop everything and come with him, but the backlog of work just couldn’t
be ignored or pushed off anymore. After today things would be closer to normal,
but for now he had to go without his Celly for a bit.

“Ponyville is just up ahead, sir!” Sergeant Pokey shouted back. “We should be on
the ground in just a minute or so!”

Anon had wondered what Ponyville was like, and he had tried to envision it based
on what Celestia had told him about it. Now that it was within sight, he smiled.

Celestia had described it perfectly.

The buildings that made up the quaint hamlet were simple but sturdy, with timber
framed walls and thatched roofs that were neat and clean. A stately town hall
stood in the center of the hamlet, a windmill towards the edge of town, and a
large apple orchard just on the outskirts and across the small river. The whole
town looked inviting and cosy, just the kind of place he would have moved to if
he hadn’t met Celestia.

The carriage touched down right next to the town hall, and a sizeable group of
ponies that had gathered broke out into applause as they landed. Anon followed
the Crystal Empire’s leaders lead, and he smiled and waved back as he
disembarked. Twilight, Spike, and another mare with a pale, grayish-amber coat
and gray mane were waiting for them near the entrance to the hall, but Anon was
was a bit embarrassed to have all three of them bow to him.

“Good morning, Your Highnesses,” the last pony offered, as they arose. “I am
Mayor Mare, and on behalf of the citizens of Ponyville it’s my honor to welcome
you here today.”

“The pleasure is mine, Mayor,” Anon replied. “And I thank you for having me on
such short notice. I’m looking forward to my visit here.”

“Princess Cadence, Prince Shining Armor, it is a pleasure to have you back as
well.”

“Likewise, Mayor,” Shining replied. He then reached out, grabbed his sister, and
pulled her into a hug. “And you! It’s good to see you again, LSBFF.”

“You too, BBBFF. I’m glad you and Princess Cadence came with Prince Anon, and I
bet he appreciates your help.”

“We do for him what we would do for you, Twilight,” Cadence replied with a quick
hug and a smile for her fellow Princess. “But, where did Anon sneak off to?”

All the ponies on stage suddenly realized Anon wasn’t there anymore. Thankfully,
it only took half a second to see that he had moved down into the crowd with
Spike and he was now shaking hands and offering greetings to as many ponies as
he could.

“I’m sorry, Mayor,” Cadence offered. “Anonymous is still learning.”

“Not at all! I was actually hoping he’d do this. Everypony in town was eager to
meet him, so this couldn’t be better.”

“Where are your friends, Twily?” Shining asked.

“They’re helping with the last little bit of marshmallow cleanup,” Twilight
said.

“Do they need help?”

“Oh, no. They’re probably finished now. This was nothing compared to the
plunderseed vines from a couple of weeks ago.”

“All right, if you say so.”

“Well, once Prince Anon is done with the crowd, a light luncheon has been
prepared at Sugarcube Corner.” Mayor Mare added. “And then I believe Twilight
had a tour of Ponyville planned for the Prince.”

“Mm-hmm!” Twilight affirmed, while pulling a scroll out of thin air with her
magic. “I have an itemized and alphabetized list of all the shops and scenic
stops in Ponyville. We’ll just follow the list and everything will be perfect!”

“I’m sure he’ll love that,” Shining said dryly.





“All right,” Twilight announced while producing her agenda, and Anon noticed she
had the whole day marked out in five minute intervals, complete with bathroom
breaks. “We’ll first go check out the local shops in town, starting with the
Carousel Boutique. Rarity will be ecstatic to see you again, but you might end
up leaving with a new suit.”

“I probably need it. I don’t have much of a royal wardrobe yet.”

Twilight smiled in a knowing way. “You’ll definitely get one then, and you’re
going to like the way you look. I guarantee it.”

It was a short walk to the Boutique, and Anon quite liked the external design of
Rarity’s shop. A small bell jingled as they walked in, and Anon began glancing
around at the various articles of clothing, trying to figure out what would go
well with his look without clashing against Celestia.

“Rarity!” Twilight called out. “Are you—”

“GOOD GRACIOUS DON’T LET HIM COME IN HERE! I’M NOT DECENT!”

Both princess and guest were tossed backward like leaves in a hurricane, passing
through the front door and collecting a pair of guards in the process, then
tumbling across the grass as the boutique door slammed shut. And from the
sounds, possibly locked itself. Twice.

“Rarity!” Twilight struggled for a moment to pull her horn out of a nearby tree.
“That was unwarranted!”

“The prince can’t see me yet!” echoed her voice out of the closed storefront.
“Not until everything is just perfect! Now run along, Twilight, and I’ll send
for you when I’m done.”

“Mares,” said Sergeant Clover Leaf in her normal breathy contrello. “Always so
picky about what they wear.” The guard took a moment to brush off a tuft of
grass clinging to her armor and reached down to give Anon a hoof-up from his
sprawled position across the walkway.

“Oh my goodness! Are you alright, Twilight?” Fluttershy’s soft words held an
amazing depth of concern for her friend.

“I’m fine,” Twilight replied while rubbing the base of her horn. “Ow.”

“Oh, good. I hate to be rude, but I need to go.”

“Do you need any help?” Anon asked, and he and Twilight fell into step next to
her with a smile.

“Oh, no,” she quietly replied. “I’d hate to be a bother. Angel Bunny is just
being a bit persnickety about his carrots again. He doesn’t like the ones I got
yesterday.”

“A bunny that’s a picky eater?” Anon asked.

“Angel isn’t picky, he just has some… particular tastes is all. Once I get some
fresh carrots everything will be fine.”

“Oh! Maybe the Prince can help then,” Twilight replied. “He used to be a chef at
a gourmet restaurant.”

“Upscale,” he quickly corrected under his breath.

“Oh, that’s okay. I wouldn’t want to be a burden, and I’m sure you have lots to
do today.”

“I’m pretty extra sure I could spare a minute,” Anon replied warmly. “I’d be
delighted to help.”

“Oh, well, okay then,” Fluttershy said happily. “The stall is just right over
there.”

Anon looked over the selection at the stand as soon as they arrived, and his
smile deepened. They were quite obviously home-grown carrots, with slight zigs
and zags and little specks of dirt still clinging to them, just perfect for
cooking with. He began to smell, then jerked his head up and looked at
Fluttershy.

“Raw carrots, right? Not cooking carrots or stewing, or even for frying?”

“Oh, yes,” said Fluttershy. “He doesn’t like them cooked.”

“Very well.” Anon dipped his head back down and began his inspection of the rows
of carrots.

“Your Highness?” The stall keeper asked nervously. “Is everything—”

He politely shushed her, his eyes closed, and his nose dropped so close that it
was hard to tell if he was touching the produce or not. His breathing became
deep for a moment, he gave a quick snort, and then he picked out three near the
back of the rack.

“These ones are the absolute best ones on the cart,” he proclaimed. He then held
them out in his hand towards Fluttershy. “Here. Take a good long whiff.”

“Um, okay,” she replied with obvious confusion, and then did as she’d been
asked.

“Can you smell it?” he eagerly asked.

“I smell carrots,” Fluttershy offered nervously.

“No, no. Slow down. Take a moment, clear your mind. Don’t smell the surface,
smell deeper.”

“Deeper?” Twilight asked.

“Yes. A whole new world opens up when we do so. Go just a bit beyond what you
smell at first, take a moment to truly savor it. Give the core of it a chance to
come out, then you can tell it’s true worth and flavor. Smell them again, but
this time reach with your senses. It sounds strange but try it. Close your eyes
and open your mind.”

Twilight and Fluttershy gave each other a confused look but then decided to try
it.

“Now, there’s a reason they use musical terms when describing food. Think of it
like that: notes, chords, melodies. Don’t focus on the first notes of the
carrot, smell for the background, the consonants and the countermelodies. Don’t
listen to just the cello, listen for all the instruments.”

The stall keeper watched in confusion as both Fluttershy and Twilight tried to
follow Anon’s instructions. It took a couple of moments, but then Fluttershy
opened her eyes and smiled.

“I think I smell it,” she softly said. “It smells like rich and soft dirt.”

“The type of dirt that has been carefully tended to and is perfect for crops,”
Anon added knowingly.

“I smell carrots,” Twilight said with a hint of annoyance.

“It’s going to be harder for you,” Anon replied. “You’re very analytical, and
it’s not so easy for an abstract concept like this to get through to such a
mind. When you listen to music, do you feel the tone and the movement of it, or
do you pick out individual notes, keys, time signatures and beats? It’s the same
here. You’ll need to work harder, but also let go of more.”

Twilight nodded, but she still looked a bit annoyed.

“How much for the carrots, Golden Harvest?” Fluttershy asked.

“Huh?” she replied, and she dropped the bundle of carrots she’d been sniffing.
“Oh! Three bits should cover it.”

Payment was made, and then Fluttershy offered a quick thank you and
goodbye-for-now as she flew back to her cottage. Twilight then summoned her
list, and the two struck out once more.

“Can you really smell all that in a carrot?” she asked while they walked.

“I can, but I have practice. If you ever tried to teach me calculus I’d probably
never understand, no matter how simply you explained it.”

This seemed to cheer up the Princess. “Yeah, I guess so. We all have our
strengths, right?”

“Right.”

The conversation was interrupted by moaning behind them, and the group turned to
see who or what was causing it. What they found was Pinkie Pie, who was green in
the face and looking rather sick. Her hooves were dragging along in the dirt,
her stomach looked oddly swollen, and she was being accompanied by three small
fillies who looked extremely remorseful.

“Ooh.” Pinkie groaned. “So… much… marshmallow. I can’t believe I ate the whole
thing.”

“You ate that?” Twilight asked in shock. “Just a minute, Anon. I need to help
Pinkie.”

“Please do. I can wait.”

“Really, Pinkie, we’re super sorry about all this,” the little pegasus offered
as Twilight rushed to her friend’s side.

“Yeah. We didn’t know marshmallows could do that,” the earth pony with the large
bow in her mane added.

“It’s okay girls,” Pinkie replied with a weak wave of her hoof. “I just need a
few minutes. Just remember that marshmallows should only be handled by -urp-
properly trained and qualified ponies, okay?”

“We will,” all three replied in unison.

“Hey! Anon!”

Anon looked around and then up, and watched as Rainbow Dash landed in front of
him. She looked rather irate, and the two sergeants moved to be between him and
her.

“Relax, guys,” Rainbow said while folding her arms tightly. “I just want to ask
Prince Anon a question.”

“It’s okay,” Anon replied, and the loyal royal guards stepped to the side but
still stayed focused on Rainbow. “What’s up?”

“Why do you hate the Broncos so much?” Rainbow blurted.

That was definitely not what Anon had expected. “What?”

“Shining Armor tells me you’ve got something against the Broncos.”

“I do?”

“Yeah. He says you hate them.”

“No, I said they stink. I never said anything about hating them.”

“They don’t stink! They’re awesome! Back-to-back champions for five years in a
row!”

It took Anon a moment to process that sentence, but then he snickered a little.
“Yes, forty-five years ago though. They haven’t won a divisional game in
thirty-eight years.”

“They’re just going through a rough patch, that’s all.”

“A thirty-eight year rough patch?” Anon asked flatly. “The original line from
those years have grandchildren trying out for the team now.”

“So what? If they hadn’t lost Leading Edge last year they totally would have
killed everyone! Just watch. They’re going to make some big moves and crush
everypony who gets in their way.”

“If they actually do that I will gladly eat every bad word I ever said about
them.” He chuckled.

“Rainbow! Hey!”

“A.J.?” Rainbow called back. Both she and Anon watched her quickly trot up to
them. “What’s up?”

“Have either of you seen Apple Bloom?” she asked. “Ah need her back at the farm,
pronto.”

“I think she just went by with Pinkie.”

“Dag nabbit, is she still helpin’ her? Ah got a rush order that just came in and
ah gotta whole mess of apples to get harvested to fill it.”

“Where’s Big Mac?”

“Ah dunno, he’s disappeared on me too. Ah think he’s done snuck off to
Cheerilee’s place again.”

“Can I help with anything?” Anon asked.

Applejack looked him over with a critical eye. “Ah dunno. You know anything
‘bout bucking apples?”

“Well, I know how to cook them,” he offered. “But if I can help out I’d like
to.”

“All right. Ah suppose ah can give you a shot. Dash, can you give me a hoof as
well?”

“Whatcha need?”

“Ah just need you to run the full baskets back to the wagon. If you and Anon can
do that for me, this’ll be faster than Granny Smith on her laxatives.”

“You bet! I can totally do that.”

“All right. Let’s get to it!”





“You tin cans sure you don’t wanna help out too?”

“We’re here to guard the Prince, ma’am. Can’t do that if we’re harvesting,”
Sergeant Hokey Pokey replied.

“Figures. All right, let’s get to it. Anon, you’re not an earth pony so I don't
know hows hard this will be for ya. Every tree has a sweet spot, so all yah
gotta do is find it and them apples will tumble right out and into the basket
pretty as you please. Now, all you gotta do is… Anon?”

“Find the sweet spot,” he echoed, as he walked up to the nearby tree and put his
hands to it.

“What in tarnation are you doin’?”

“Shh, just watch,” Rainbow said with a slight squeal of delight. 

Anon caressed the bark withnhis palms, then took three steps to the left.
Another round of feeling, and back half a step.

“Consarn it, we ain’t got time for this. Look, all you gotta do is…”

Anon kicked the tree with a smug smile. A full basket of apples tumbled out of
the tree, pretty as he pleased, and Applejack whistled in amazement.

“Well ah’ll be a nanny goat’s aunt! How’d you do that?”

“Every tree has a sweet spot,” he repeated. “I'm pretty sure I can feel it."

“Yer gonna have to show me how you did that later. Right now, ah reckon it’s
time to buck some apples!”

Between the two of them, it only took perhaps half an hour to harvest enough
apples for Applejack’s order. She was faster than him by two trees to one to
begin with, but after three or four trees Anon got a groove going and was barely
able to keep pace with her, although he suspected it was mainly from Applejack
constantly pausing to look back. By the end of it, Rainbow Dash reported hauling
back fifty three bushels of apples, and the three of them stood and looked over
the results of their work with pride.

“Shoot, Ah’d hire you on full-time if you wasn’t the prince,” Applejack
remarked. “You got a good method goin’ there.”

“Well, thank you.” He chuckled. “Though I’m pretty sure I’ll be feeling this in
the morning.”

“Ah reckon you will, but ah’m pretty sure the Princess will take care of ya.”

“She probably will,” he laughed with them.

“Say, have you ever played a game of buckball?” Rainbow asked.

“Not as part of a team, no. Just some playground games when I was younger.”

“I bet he’d be pretty good at it, A.J.”

“He’s got the legs for it, that’s for sure,” Applejack agreed. “He’d be
respectable enough, ah reckon.”

“We should totally get a game going!”

“Ah think the Prince has got better things to do today, Dash. Twilight is
probably wondering where he ran off to.”

And right on cue, Twilight teleported right in front of them in a massive
explosion, instead of her usual pop. “Have either of you seen Prince Anon?” she
hurriedly and worriedly asked. “I lost him back in Ponyville and I can’t find
him anywhere.”

“He’s right here, Twilight,” Applejack replied. “He was kind enough to… help…”

It was right then that both Applejack and Rainbow Dash noticed he was, in fact,
not there. Both of them glanced around, and then Rainbow Dash went airborne as
Applejack scratched her head.

“Well he was here,” she remarked. “Ah wonder how he slipped out on us. Looks
like his tin cans took off with him too.”

“Well, that makes me feel a little better but we still gotta find him.”

“Calm down, sugarcube. Ah’m sure he’s just fine.”

Twilight went nose-to-nose with the farmer. “Do you want to be the one to tell
Princess Celestia her husband is missing?”

“Heh, well, when you put it that way… ah’ll go check the south forty right
quick.” > 18. - Ponyville Part 2 >
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Anonymous couldn’t suppress his cheesy grin, even if he had tried. “You know, if
you wanted some quality time together, I could have made room for you in my
schedule. You didn’t have to kidnap me.”

“Yes I did,” Celestia replied, as she nuzzled her Anon. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, and I’m glad you’re here. Your protégée is going to worry
though,” he whispered into her ear.

“Not for long. I told Spike, Shining, Cadence and the Mayor I wanted to take you
on a quick field trip. Once she meets up with one of them, it’ll be sorted out.”

“I still think she’s going to pop in on us and chew you out.”

“There is a good possibility of that.” Celestia withdrew far enough to look into
Anon’s eyes, but no further.

“And how did my captive princess escape from her tower of imprisonment?”

She waggled her wings. “I flew, silly. These aren’t just for looks.”

“Did you seriously just up and take off?” Anon had to laugh with Celestia’s
earnest nod.

“Seriously. I couldn’t stay focused in Canterlot. Every time I got started on a
project my mind would drift to you. I just cancelled everything and then told
Wysteria to send my guards to Ponyville as I flew away.”

“You are going to be in so much trouble,” he chided playfully.

“I don’t care,” she replied with a giggle. “What can they do? I am a Princess
after all. I even brought our chaperones,” she added with a pointed wingtip
towards Sergeants Clover Leaf and Hokey Pokey.

“Somepony will set Luna on your trail is what they’ll do. Where are we, anyway?”
he asked, as he looked at the ruins around them.

“This is my old home, Anon. The Castle of The Two Sisters.”

Anon’s breath instantly stilled to a hushed awe, and his eyes went wide. This
was a hallowed place, one that everyone in Equestria spoke of in the most
reverent of tones from the moment they learned how to walk. He’d seen sketches
and old photographs in school, of course, but it was now obvious that those had
only captured a fraction of the true majesty and devastation before him.

“Sergeants, could you stay here for a moment?” Celestia asked, and they both
nodded. “Thank you. Come with me, Anon. I want to show you some things within.”

He nodded and followed as they entered through the remains of the old main
doors. Sunlight filtered in through the holes in the roof, and Anon had to watch
his step as he maneuvered around various fallen stones and debris.

“I can’t even recall the last time I was here,” Celestia remarked as she slowed
and looked around the hallway. “I used to come every year to remember; a sort of
pilgrimage if you will. It grew to be too much, after long enough. My heart
couldn’t take the pain I felt at losing my sister. I finally had to stop or else
I risked succumbing to a very crushing depression.”

“I can’t even imagine,” Anon replied reverently as they walked into a foyer.

Celestia sighed deeply. “There are times when this day has haunted my dreams for
weeks. I’ve lived and relived the events thousands of times. So much was lost
here, and all because of my blindness.”

He then turned and followed her into a large round room. The remains of a
shattered stained-glass window was at the far end, along with two smashed and
crumbling thrones that were weathered and worn. Scorch marks and potholes
littered the floor, and Anon took it all in with profound and silent respect.

“Here,” Celestia said, as she slowed to a stop. “Right here. This is where I was
when I watched my sister give in to the Nightmare.”

Anon could hear the pain of those ancient anguished words as if they had soaked
into the ancient stones of this place and continued to reverberate through the
centuries.

“Luna! I will not fight you! You must lower the moon, it is your duty!”

“And see, right there?” Celestia pointed with a hoof. “That was the statue that
housed the Elements of Harmony.”

Anon quietly walked up and then put a hand gently on the towering structure.

“Luna? I am… Nightmare Moon! I have but one royal duty now: to destroy you!”

He exhaled slowly. The air of both history and destiny was thick enough to chew.

“That was the last time the Elements answered my call,” Celestia continued. “I
can’t say for sure why, but I think they somehow realized that Luna had fallen.
Perhaps they were touched by my sister’s troubled heart? I wish I knew. They
turned to stone after that, lifeless, cold, and devoid of their former power. I
kept them here, in their appointed place, and I waited. I was convinced that
they could be used to reclaim Luna, once they could renew themselves. I hoped
and I watched for weeks at a time, but as those weeks quickly changed into
months, then to years, my hope decayed and dwindled until it finally died
entirely. I came to realize that my most earnest wish would go unfulfilled. I
had to live with myself and with what I’d done. That kind of power was never
meant to be used by one pony alone.”

Anon looked around the room. “Celly, I don’t… I don’t even…”

“You see why I had to stop coming, yes?” She let out a grim chuckle that held no
joy. “There was so much I missed out on, so much I could have done differently.”

Anon turned to her and found his notebook floating in her magic before him. He
gently took it, and saw it was open to his How to Woo Celestia page. She had
added another item in her column:

Love me despite my failures.

“Celly, I…”

“Your father is not the only one who has had to live with the consequences of
arrogance. Luna tried to tell me. I had some warning as to what would happen,
but I did nothing. I couldn’t believe it. I had the endless praise of my ponies,
surely Luna did as well! She was just ungrateful, or was a glory hog. I passed
off her concerns as those of a pony who just wanted more, ever more. Even as I
watched her fall into corruption before my eyes, I believed it all to be a show
to gain attention. I didn’t take it seriously until it was far too late.

“Anon, when you rejected the divorce papers and told me you wanted to try to
make our relationship work, I knew I had to bring you here. I have been worried
that you fell in love with the Perfect Princess of the Sun, the Celestia who
leads graciously and rules in peace. You must understand that I have and will
continue to make mistakes. Some of them have been quite egregious, but the worst
mistake I have ever made was ignoring a problem which nearly cost my sister,
forever.”

Anon thought for a moment. “Do you fear this will happen to us?”

“I fear that as you learn about the true me—as you discover all the parts that
don’t fit the perfect princess persona—that you will become disgusted by what
you find and walk away. There has been darkness in my past, and you will come
face-to-face with it sooner or later.”

“I don’t think I will walk away.” He smiled, and he sat so he could hold her
hooves in his hands. “Shadows can’t exist in total darkness, after all. They
need light, until they cease to be with the full power of the midday sun. You
were a sun rising then, but now you are the sun shining forth with majesty.”

He then moved in to touch her nose gently against her neck. “And while I mean no
disrespect to your sister, I think the love we have is of the type that you
don’t want to lose.”

“I don’t,” she whispered, her voice heavy with emotion. “But what if my true
self is unforgivable in your eyes?”

“I love you, Celestia,” he whispered back, and his heart skipped with her
fluttering breath. “And I also trust that, no matter what the outcome was, the
decisions you made in your life were generally meant to be good, especially
after what happened here. We all make mistakes, and I am more than willing to be
forgiving of yours. I hope you will be forgiving of mine, too.”

“I’m pretty extra sure I can be,” she replied, and they both laughed a little as
they pulled back to look at each other.

“You know, I also love how warm and expressive your eyes are,” Anon remarked,
and Celestia blushed a bit. “They get so dark when you’re feeling low, and they
sparkle when you laugh, almost like… lilacs in the spring.”

“They do, hm?” she asked. “I hated the color as a filly.”

“No, they’re…” he leaned in, “…they’re just…” his lips puckered, and so did
hers, “perfect…”

A loud bang and a bright flash of lavender both interrupted and killed the
moment, and Anon found he had recoiled a few feet backwards out of shock.

“AH HA!” Twilight shouted. “I found you!”

“Why, good afternoon, Twilight!” Celestia looked at her student with impeccable
calm, which was a far cry from Anon, who was clutching his chest and
hyperventilating slightly at Twilight’s abrupt arrival.

“Good afternoon, Princess,” Twilight called over her shoulder in her mentor’s
general direction while she marched up and confronted Anon. “Look, you can’t
just disappear like that! I’ve torn apart half of Ponyville looking for you! I’m
responsible for your safety while you’re here, and I can’t do that if you run
off on me! If you wanted to see the old castle that’s fine, and we could have
made arrangements to wait until the Princess got here, but you’ve got to tell me
these things so I can plan appropriately.”

“Twilight,” Celestia flatly said.

“Now, since you’re still new to being a royal I’ll let it slide, but I expect
you to be more professional next time.” A quill and scroll appeared in front of
her out of nowhere, and her magic began scribbling as she continued. “Thus, for
all future visits I will need you to submit an itemized itinerary, complete with
your arrival day and time, time and date of departure, and if you are travelling
with or without Celestia.”

“Twwwiiiillliigghhttt…” Celestia tried to call out to her.

“I will need a list of all intended and requested stops and scenic locales you
wish to frequent, and how long you intend to stay at each place. I can then
coordinate with the shop owners and the other local ponies to keep everything on
schedule, and…”

“Twilight, what is the square root of a negative number?”

Old habits kicked in quickly for Twilight Sparkle, and instantly she stopped
talking so her brain had full power to calculate the equation her teacher had
given her. Anon could have sworn he heard the crunch of mismatched gears
grinding as Twilight’s eyes unfocused for a moment.

“There isn’t one. It’s an imaginary number,” she replied by rote. Her eyes then
snapped back to normal. “Wait. What? What’d I do?”

“Anon didn’t know I was coming today. He was under the impression I would be in
Canterlot, catching up on work. I ambushed and foalnapped him.”

“You stole him?!”

Celestia shrugged. “More or less. Is that a problem?”

“Well, no. I guess not. He is your husband. This is just very unexpected.”

“I can be spontaneous at times,” Celestia replied, but then she laughed. “Don’t
you remember that game of snooker I played against your mother and father, and—”

“YES! Ha-ha,” Twilight nervously cut in. “Yes, I remember. I wish I didn’t, but
I do. So, since this was all an honest mistake, may I ask why you came here?”

“I wanted to show Anon what he married into. It is crucial he understands the
history of what happened here.”

“Oh.”

“You know, it would be nice if somepony could tidy things up,” Celestia casually
remarked. “Now that Luna is free of the Nightmare I think I might come back to
visit from time to time.”

“Really? You might come back?” Twilight asked, as they turned to leave the room.

“Perhaps. But if I do I will submit an itemized itinerary for your review.”

“Oh! Heh heh…” Twilight rubbed the back of her head in embarrassment.

“Would it be possible to make a quick stop at the Tree of Harmony, Twilight?”

“Of course!” she smiled. “Not a problem at all!”

“Tree of Harmony?” Anon asked. “What is that?”





Anon couldn’t find the words.

It was a hundred times—no, a thousand times worse than when he had struggled to
describe the sunflowers. The Tree of Harmony was just beyond his vocabulary.

Transcendent was about as close as he could ever get.

Though the visual sight of it was majestic enough, it was the the feel of it
that was making the deepest impression. It was like he was awash in eternity,
destiny, and harmony all at once, and that confluence of essence then flowed out
to influence the lives of all creatures, wherever they may be.

“Have you made any progress with the keys?” Celestia asked as she looked the
chest over.

“Not yet,” Twilight replied. “I’m actually really baffled.”

“Well, all we can do is trust in Harmony. The answers will be revealed to us, in
time.”

“So, how vulnerable are we without the Elements?” Anon asked.

“That is, sadly, a question we can’t fully answer.” Celestia walked over to the
tree and looked up into the tangled crystal branches where the six Elements of
Harmony glittered like colorful fruit. “But I know the Princesses of this
Kingdom will do everything they can should something arise, Elements or not. We
are not totally helpless without them.”

Celestia paused, then slipped one golden shoe from her hoof before gently
placing it on her symbol on the tree. Her eyes closed, and for a moment Anon
wondered if she had stopped breathing.

He then walked up and placed his hand on her hoof. It was a simple gesture, but
he somehow felt like, in so doing, he had made their relationship all the more
real.

It was an odd but yet wonderful feeling, and he hoped he might feel it more with
her. In fact, it matched the feather-like touch of something else deep within
the tree that seemed as if it too approved of their pairing, and was looking
forward to seeing what kind of fruit they would bear in turn.

Lifting her hoof off the tree, Celestia looked down at Anon and smiled just as
brightly as the sunshine glittering through the crystal tree above them. He
returned it in kind, she nuzzled him quickly, and then they both turned back to
Twilight.

“We should probably return to Ponyville now. Do you think I might be able to
share a quick tea break with you and your friends before the party? I would like
to see how they are all doing.”

Twilight couldn’t be any happier. “Of course, Princess! We can meet at the
library if you’d like.”

“That sounds wonderful, thank you.”

Anon gave one last glance to the Tree before he left, but what he then saw made
him pause for a moment. Somehow, Celestia’s symbol on the trunk of the tree had
changed while they weren’t looking, and the new engraving seemed oddly familiar.
Celestia’s stylized sun remained, but now there was a book on top of it, an open
book with words that he couldn’t read.

He glanced back up, and then he blinked. A glint of light had caught his
attention, forcing him to look back up at the tree where Celestia’s symbol
remained completely unchanged from the first time he had seen it. He blinked
several times, then shook his head before turning to follow Celestia out of the
beautiful cave. It was probably a trick of the light, or his own tangled
thoughts playing tricks with his eyes.

Still, he took one last look back before they started on their trip back to
Ponyville, just to make sure.

Stranger things had happened, after all.





“I do hope you can forgive my little outburst from this morning, your Highness,”
Rarity said with a nervous chuckle, and she smoothed out a non-existent wrinkle
from her breezy green summer dress.

“Call me Anon,” he replied cheerfully. “And I already have.”

“That is most kind of you,” Rarity replied with a smile.

“So, how is business for you?” he asked while shifting slightly on his cushion.

“A bit slow to be honest, darling, but it’ll pick up again soon. I have several
fall fashion shows that I’ll be participating in, and that always drums up
interest.”

“That’s good to hear.” Anon took the offered teacup from Twilight with a smile
and a quick sip. “Have you ever thought of expanding, maybe opening a second
store?”

“I would love to, but there are some details to take care of before I could do
that. Though, if I did, I suppose Canterlot would be a good place to start.”

“Either there or Manehattan. Canterlot might be more expensive in rent but I’m
not sure how their tax rates compare.”

“That does make a difference. But I do believe Canterlot would have more of the
clientele that I’m after. At the very least I have more name recognition in the
capitol.”

“Well, if you do open up there, I will give you my official royal seal of
approval and send everyone I know to you.”

“Why, that would be fabulous, darling!” Rarity positively beamed.

“Hey, Anon!” Rainbow shouted from the other side of the library. “What kind of
tea is this?” She then leaned over and nudged Pinkie Pie, who looked much
improved from earlier. “Watch this. His nose is, like, freakishly awesome.”

Anon frowned. “I don’t know what kind of tea this is.”

“What? How could you not know? Just smell it.”

Anon sighed, then dipped down close to the cup. Whatever it was, it wasn’t
anything he was remotely familiar with. His parents had always drank smooth,
relaxing herbal teas, and whatever this was definitely had more energy to it. He
too a deep whiff, then a quick taste.

“Well?” Rainbow asked immediately.

Anon fought hard not to gag. “I still don’t know,” he managed to get out. “I’ve
never had this type of tea before.”

“What?! You’re pullin’ my tail. I saw you sniff out those carrots with
Fluttershy and the apple trees with A.J.”

“Food and beverages are two different things,” he replied defensively. “I’ve
never been able to tell one tea from another. They all smell pretty much the
same to me.”

“Well that’s lame.”

Rainbow Dash then found herself at the receiving end of one of Celestia’s
patented glares, and the colorful mare chuckled nervously as one of Celestia’s
eyebrows slid upwards to emphasize her displeasure. “Uh, I mean…”

“Everyone’s talents manifest in different ways,” Celestia said in a kind but
stern tone. “There is nothing wrong with only being able to distinguish the
differences in food. Is Fluttershy ‘lame’ because she does not fly as fast as
you? It is the same ability after all.”

“Of course not! Fluttershy’s flying is perfect!”

“And so is Anon’s delightful nose.” She displayed her preference by giving said
nose a brief kiss, as well as a quick lick to collect the last few drips of tea
still on the stubble hairs of his upper lip. “See? He’s delicious,” she added
while Anon spluttered.

“To be fair, I have personally wondered why I’m only good with food,” Anon
offered. “I probably need to study my beverages more.”

“Just be very careful about disparaging others talents and abilities,” Celestia
concluded.

“I will,” Rainbow said morosely.

“So, since we’re all here,” Twilight cut in now. “I wanted to ask and see if
anypony has had any ideas about the chest at the Tree of Harmony?”

The reply from all was scattered head shaking and murmurs of no.

“Well, keep your eyes open. You never know where we might find those keys.”

Anon stuck a hoof in the air. “Have you maybe considered keeping a journal?”

“A journal?”

“Yeah. When my family tries to come up with new recipes, we would keep a record
of things that we thought might be inspiring, like if the smell of bread baking
gave us any thoughts, or if we were travelling somewhere and saw something that
looked delicious. Maybe if you each kept a record of your friendship lessons,
you could get some inspiration that way. Then, you could share what you’ve seen
with one another, and one of you might see something that was missed. Two sets
of eyes on an event kinda thing, right?”

“It would give me a series of data points to correlate,” Twilight mused.

“And writing down your friendship lessons has given you a lot of insights in the
past, right?”

“Yes, it has. What do you think, girls? I personally think It’s not a bad idea.”

“It’d help to keep us on the lookout during the day, too,” Applejack stated.
“Ah’d be more observant of what’s goin’ on around me if ah know ah’ll be writing
it down.”

The other five then agreed that keeping journals was, at the very least, a good
start and better than sitting around and guessing. Twilight agreed to keep the
journal collection in the library, but in a place where the girls could get to
it whenever they wanted, and then all six thanked Anon for the idea.

He humbly took the thanks, and then he simply sat back and listened as the
Ponyville friends began chatting about their previous adventures with each other
and with Celestia. He had, of course, read about some of their adventures in the
newspaper back home, but he was interested and quite amazed to hear the smaller
stories, like how Applejack and Rainbow Dash had lost a ‘Running of The Leaves’
race to Twilight (and she had come in 5th place herself), or how Pinkie Pie had
managed to create “at least a hundred dozen copies” of herself in something
called a Mirror Pool, if Rainbow’s story was to be believed. He was amazed they
had been through so much together, and at how strong the bonds of friendship
were between them. It wasn’t hard to see how they had managed to rally together
every time Equestria had needed them.

After perhaps an hour or so of this, Spike entered the library darted into the
room with a quick greeting to everypony, and then he whispered something in
Pinkie Pie’s ear. As soon as he did so, Pinkie grew a gigantic smile, but when
the secret exchange was over Pinkie shooed him back outside quickly.

“Prince Anon?” she then said. “Could you come over here?”

He did so with a wary smile, but he felt his excitement inexplicably growing
while the other mares in the room surrounded him by the main door.

“Prince Anon,” Pinkie grandly announced, “it is now high time for…”

“A PRINCE PARTY!” The Element Bearers all shouted at once. Pinkie then threw
open the front door, and a large cheer broke out from the crowd that was
assembled outside.

“C’mon!” Pinkie shouted, as she grabbed his hoof and dragged him outside. “It’s
time to par-tay!”





Pinkie Pie was truly a master party planner.

Anon smiled as he looked over the ponies on the dance floor. The party had been
so wonderful that he didn’t really want it to end. He had been worried that
Pinkie would go all out and over-the-top, with his face on large poster boards
and everything being human-related somehow. Instead, it was much more like a
simple birthday party. There were plenty of cupcakes and pies and ice cream to
sample.

There were also plenty of games for ponies to play, with things running from a
ring toss and a dunk-the-Mayor tank to Sister Says and tag. The ‘Round With The
Prince’ game she had mentioned the other day had actually turned out to be a fun
contest to see who could sink a putt from a further distance on a miniature golf
green, and he had loved the ‘Guess What is In The Box’ game as well. Upbeat
music provided by the local D.J. played in the background, and the yellow
balloons scattered about made the whole thing complete. Celestia had happily
joined in the festivities, and she even managed to win a small stuffed bear from
the ring toss game, much to everypony’s delight.

At dusk, everything had been put on hold to allow Celestia to lower the sun.
There was a respectful reverence as it slid behind Canterlot Mountain, but then
there was a large shout and cheer of joy when Luna’s moon drifted upward.

He secretly hoped Luna had heard it.

Once done, it was time to dance under the stars. Anon was initially hesitant to
join in, since he had no idea how to properly dance. However, once he saw
Twilight’s own ‘interpretive effort,’ he decided to simply cut loose and to copy
Twilight’s unique—if not a little back-breaking—style. Once that happened,
everypony else simply joined in with their own interpretative dances as well,
and Anon felt like the fun had been doubled, at least.

However, the hour was growing late and he had spied his wife yawning daintily
behind a hoof once or twice in the last few moments. He knew there was no way
either of them were going to escape a wagon load of work tomorrow, and so he
took a little initiative and summoned Pinkie Pie over.

She was somewhat sad at first after he explained it was time for them to leave,
but she had also understood and nodded in agreement. She then quickly made her
way over to the D.J.—her name was Vinyl Scratch, wasn’t it?—and lifted one
headphone off of her ear to speak to her. A nod and then a microphone was given
to Pinkie, and the music came to a stop so she could explain.

“Hey everypony! Are we having a good time?”

“Yeah!” The crowd roared back.

“I said, ARE WE HAVING A GOOD TIME?!”

“YEAH!”

Pinkie giggled and snorted once. “I think this has been the bestest ‘New Prince
in Equestria’ party since the one we had for Shining Armor, am I right?”

“That was our wedding reception, you hijacker!” Shining shouted.

“Potato, potahto,” she replied, and everyone laughed. “Sadly, though, the Prince
and Princess need to leave. I know!” She added over the sad groans. “I don’t
want them to go either, but they have a kingdom to run. So, even though they
insist we keep the party going for as long as we want, we’re going to have the
last dance now for them and then let them go. Scratch? A little soul if you
please.”

Anon stood and dipped his head towards Celestia as soft and slow music began to
play. “May I have this dance, my fair princess?”

“I would be delighted to,” she replied cheerfully. He offered a hand and she
gladly took it, and the crowd parted to allow both sets of Royals to the middle
of the floor.

“You’re going to have to give me some dancing lessons, too,” he remarked. “All I
can do is shuffle my feet.”

“Sometimes that’s all you need to do,” she softly replied, and he smiled as she
nuzzled him and then rested her head on his shoulder.

“Did you ever regret becoming the Princess?” he gently asked while they moved
with the other dancers.

“Regret?”

“Yeah. Did you ever say to yourself, ‘Self, I wish I had just left well enough
alone and remained a unicorn?’”

“No. If I had, we’d be under fifty feet of ice and snow.”

“Okay, bad example. Let me rephrase the question. Did you ever want to be a
commoner, provided everything else in the kingdom was taken care of?”

“Did I ever want to step away,” she offered. “Leave it all, be just a normal
pony, with normal problems and regular dreams and—”

He waited for a moment.

“—and to possibly find my own special somepony. Well, the simple answer is no.”

“Really?”

“I never wished to give up the lot I was given. We may not have a choice on the
role we play on the stage of life, but we can choose how we perform as the
actors. There are some scenes I would redo but, on the whole, I am pleased and
grateful for what I have.

“But I have contemplated how things would have been if I had not been a
Princess. I’ve mused about the things I might have done, or the employment I
might have had. I did, once or twice, wonder if I might have found a special
somepony in that life.”

She then moved in closer to his ear. “If I had changed any of the details of my
life, I might not have ever found you, and that, my dear Anon, would have been
the greatest tragedy I would have never known. My lot has now led me to you, and
you to me. It is irrelevant to me if I found you by fate, destiny, or sheer dumb
luck. What matters is that I did find you.”

“And despite everything, you want to keep me,” he whispered back. “That is the
most incredible part of all this to me. Of all the potential suitors, you hold
me dear.”

“Ask Cadence sometime about the unpredictability of love.” She chuckled. “It is
true that there are a thousand other ways I could have fallen for a thousand
other people, but from here and forever more, I will want you.”

His whole body shivered with delight as he heard that sentence. “Then I do
believe I shall stay for quite some time. I have found in you something I don’t
think I could ever find anywhere else.”

“You had better stay,” she replied with a playful nip to his ear. “Someone has
to help me torment Luna.”

“We shall be relentless and unstoppable then! Torments untold for the sister!”
They laughed together while swirling around one more time on the dance floor
before their return to Canterlot. > 19. - 20,000 Leagues >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Anon?” Celestia’s delectable voice drifted into one of Anon’s ears.

He replied with a blissful grunt and a quick wiggle into her warm shoulder.

“A-n-on?” Her dulcet call came with a gentle nibble at the base of his ears.

“Muh! Guhwai,” he replied with an ill-hidden smirk.

“Are you sure you want me to do that?” she whispered.

“Nuh uh. Stay. Cozy.”

He then wiggled so that more of him was pressed up against her, and she replied
with a playful giggle. The wing that had been covering him began to stroke his
back, and he let out a full smile and a grunt that any primitive caveman would
have been proud of.

“I stay here with pretty pony princess. Younger sister can raise sun. Hives are
fun.”

“Younger sister looks funny when she breaks out and she gets incredibly
grouchy.”

“There is that.” He grunted, and then he stretched his arms out straight in
front of him. “Luna already has it out for me, so I should probably not irk
her.”

“You are filthy,” Celestia noted with a kiss to his cheek.

“I was bucking apples,” he retorted with a return kiss of his own. “But at least
I have been coated in a fine, high-quality soil, which is dirt with a good
reputation, if I understand properly.”

“I see, but now I am dirty too,” she continued. She stood and lifted her wing,
which made Anon snicker at the oblong brown smudge he’d left in her immaculate
white coat.

“Oops?” he offered.

“Oops indeed.” She smiled. “I suppose we shall have to bathe before starting the
day.”

“Bath?” he repeated, and he sat up quickly while shaking his head vehemently.
“No way. I had one last year and I’m still good.”

She gave him a dubious look. “I doubt your hygiene is that poor, especially
given your prior profession.”

“Nope, I’m being totally honest.”

“One bath since this time last year?”

“Yep.”

She then offered a sly smile. “And how many showers do you take in a year?”

“Um, well...” he sheepishly replied. “Twice a day, so…”

“Well, it is high time you had another bath,” she declared with a laugh. “If you
don’t like this one then you may wait another year.”

“Fair enough. I have no doubt you will convince me to bathe more frequently.”

Celestia gave him a quick nip on the neck, then crossed the room and stuck her
head out into the hallway for a moment as he stood and shook the last bits of
sleep from his hair. She then trotted back, but paused at the doors that led to
the balcony.

“Would you like to join me for the sunrise, Anon?” she asked kindly.

“Do fish swim?” he replied, and he walked over to her. “I’d love to join you.”

She giggled at bit at his eagerness, and then they both walked out onto the
balcony, side by side. Once they reached the railing at the far end Anon tried
to move out of the way, but Celestia’s wing reached out and pulled him into a
warm snuggle.

“If Luna could raise the moon with Star Struck under her wing then I can do the
same with you and the sun,” she simply stated.

“Has raising the sun ever gotten old?” he asked.

“How so?”

“Well, you’ve been doing this for over a thousand years. Do you even think about
what you’re doing anymore, or it just automatic now, like when a pegasus flaps
their wings to fly?”

“I try to be very mindful of what I am doing, but at times it has become just
one of many steps in my morning routine. Doing the same thing every morning will
do that.”

“Huh. So, what helps you to keep it from being ‘just another step?’”

“I think back to how things were.” She closed her eyes, and Anon could feel the
sea of memories flowing to her. “I remember how the unicorn tribe believed
themselves superior and how fundamentally wrong that was. I remind myself of the
suffering I saw among the earth ponies, the sorrow I felt when I walked amongst
half-starved colts and spoke with frozen mothers. I hope I never lose the
emotion I have attached to those images of families struggling to survive on the
roots and scraps left by Hurricane and her soldiers.

“Mostly, though, I remind myself of how important my duty is by thinking back to
when I first raised the sun. It was peaceful, but beyond any power I had ever
experienced in my life. I realized then, as I strained against the weight of it
for the first time, that I was controlling the one thing that could bring life
or death to untold millions. The very survival of my world and everything that I
held dear within it rested upon my back. If I remember the full scope of what I
am responsible for, it’s easy to regain the proper perspective.”

Her horn then lit while she continued to speak, and Anon eagerly watched the
eastern horizon. “I suppose the same thing will be true for us. We could become
distant due to familiarity.”

“Then we should remember how we feel right now,” he replied before a blast of
pure joy electrified his entire being with the first rays of morning light.

“I believe that will be quite doable,” she happily replied.

“But, I really was just expecting you to answer with a simple yes or no.”

“Have I ever done that?” she asked playfully.

“No,” he replied with a hug to her neck.





“Now, we can’t spend very long in the tub,” Celestia reminded Anon.

“Wrinkles?” He lifted a hand. “Mine get all scrunchy after a few hours.”

“No,” she chided mildly. “We have a lot to catch up on today.”

“’We?’ You have a lot of work to catch up on. I don’t have any clue about what
to do.”

“Well, that changes today,” she replied as she pushed open the bathroom doors.
“If you’re going to be my prince, then I want you to do prince-y things.”

“That might take awhile, you… realize...”

Anon’s eyes went wide, and it took him a minute to fully process and admire the
opulence before him. The marble tub was closer in size to a swimming pool, large
enough to accommodate his entire school swim team and still have room left over
for both Celestia and Luna to do the backstroke alongside them. The tub was fed
by a large waterfall at the far end of the room that cascaded down several
layers of cool grey granite rocks. Similar rocks—which looked very much like
enlarged version of those little hot stones Anon had seen used in massage
therapy—lined the far edge of the tub and slowly rose from the main level in
uneven steps, giving the impression that a pony could climb up to the top of the
waterfall and dive in if they wanted to. Thick and verdant foliage ran around
the perimeter of the room and bunched up around the gold-trimmed marble pillars,
and Anon gawked at the frosted-glass ceiling for a moment as he tried to make
out the swirling and swooping patterns. Steam was hugging the water like a soft,
semi-transparent blanket, and he could feel his muscles relaxing just from
thinking about the temperature. His feet stepped alongside hers as they crossed
the checkerboard tiles that ran up to and around the sparkling blue water, and
he was eager to hop in, if he could only find the diving board.

At a momentary loss for words, Anon focused on something simpler. There were
small clumps of suds being churned up by the waterfall, swirling around in the
currents, and building up into frothy peaks in the corners of the immense tub.
“It smells like strawberry bubble bath. Right?”

“You would be correct,” Celestia happily replied. “And there are enough for
however many bubbles you desire.”

Anon whistled. “How deep is it? I never learned how to swim.”

“You may want to stay away from the middle, then. The tub is deep enough to
allow me to be fully submerged, even if I am standing.”

“So if this is the bath, why is your shower so small and plain?”

“It’s only been used for one before,” she responded, then wrinkled up her nose
with a smile. “No, I tried to keep my personal quarters simple when the palace
was constructed, but there are some ponies who just get...” She paused, looking
at the waterfall cascading down the back of the room.

“Carried away?” asked Anon. “I think I understand how that can happen.”

Celestia preened under the praise and continued. “This was built without my
approval by a certain earth pony foreman who had a little too much access to the
Royal Treasury for his own good. He thought he was getting in on my good graces.
I then insisted that my shower and other facilities be unadorned and simple to
make up for this, and twice a week there is an open plunge for the staff and
their families.”

“Not a bad perk,” he replied, and he started to undress.

“Not at all.”

“Oh! Wait! I need to grab something,” he suddenly announced, and he darted
towards the bedroom.

“What are you doing?”

“Nothing! I’ll be right back!”

She chuckled with the thought of Luna giving him a hard time about how he was
actually doing something, but then she simply shook her head in amusement and
entered the tub. The water was the exact perfect temperature, and she sighed as
she felt the tension in her muscles melt away.

She then flipped onto her back, spread her wings fully, closed her eyes, and
then simply floated in bubbly goodness. Baths were a bit of a luxury for her as
well, simply due to time constraints, but when she was able to sneak one in she
reveled in it. Now that she had a special somepony to share them with, she was
highly inclined to bathe more and shower less.

She giggled a bit with the thought. A special somepony. It was quite enjoyable
to have the words apply to her. Her own Anon to hold, and to snuggle, and to
kiss.

Oh, and they were going to. She had to fight back a constant urge to bar every
door, pin him in place with her magic, and then smother him with kisses, but her
Anon would soon find out that even her willpower had its limits. Whoever said
the waiting was the best parts was a liar. There were a lot of best parts she
was looking forward to just as much or more. Her new husband just needed a
little bit more time to adjust to his new life, and then…

And then life would be perfect.

She floated with this happy thought for a moment, but then gave herself a small
dose of reality. Her married life might be perfect at that point, but life in
general would not be. Though Equestria was peaceful and prosperous, there were
still plenty of threats, and eventually they both would have to deal with them.
Chrysalis and her Changelings were still loose out in the Badlands, for one
example, and they could very well try to return.

She then frowned. Was Anon a changeling? Could he be an imposter?

The thought left her mind as quickly as it came while Celestia remembered their
dance from last night. He was real, he was a human male, and he was really hers.
The thought of him being a changeling was impossible based on his actions, his
nervousness, and his eagerness to be respectful of her. He was giving her love,
and that was a concept that changelings simply couldn’t comprehend.

She giggled a bit when she heard steps on tiles. She bit her lower lip in
mischievousness, gauged where Anon would be—an impressive feat, if she did say
so herself, given that her ears were underwater—and then quickly lashed out with
her magic, seized him, and flung him in a neat arc into the bath.

She began laughing as she flipped and stood up, but her mood instantly ran into
horror when she saw that the person she had caught was not Anon.

 “HAST THOU GONE COMPLETELY DAFT?!” Luna bellowed in the Royal Voice at her
 sister after she breached the surface like a furious whale. She then began
 hacking and wheezing to clear the water from her lungs, and Celestia moved over
 to assist.

“I am so sorry, Luna! I thought you were Anon!”

“Thou didst believe me to be Anon?!” She coughed again and glared as she pulled
her mane out of her eyes. “How could thy magic not detect the weight difference
between us?”

“Lulu, I swear, you felt about the same as Anon.”

“But, of a truth, I am larger than he.”

“I know, I know.”

Luna coughed one last time, but then glanced behind and looked at her flank.
“You are speaking truly, Sister?”

“On my word of honor, you did not feel any heavier than Anon.”

“Hm! Perhaps those rice cakes are working then,” she replied, while giving her
hips a slight shake.

Anon then entered again, humming a happy little tune and holding a small rubber
duck in one hand. He stopped once he saw Luna wiggling her rear in the tub, gave
a small shriek of alarm, and quickly grabbed a nearby towel to hold in front of
him as he looked back to Celestia.

“Both of you?” Anon’s eyes darted back and forth, and he took a step backwards.
“I didn’t think Luna would be joining our bath.”

“That makes two of us.” Luna tossed back a lock of sodden dark mane. “I was
merely stopping by to inform you that the Duke of Maretonia has had to cancel
his visit. I had no intention of staying, but since I am in here and sopping wet
anyway I might as well join you.”

“So, how did you end up in there?”

Celestia’s ears folded back, and she let out an uneasy chuckle. “I thought she
was you and I dunked her.”

“Oh! So, thank you for saving me from that, I guess?”

“I hope you appreciate my sacrifices for you, Anon,” Luna dryly offered while
she removed her wet regalia and placed it on a small pile of towels.

“What do you have there, Anon?” Celestia asked.

“Oh! This?” he looked at the toy in his hand. “It’s just a little rubber duckie.
I bought him the morning of our first meeting at the train station.”

“May I see it?”

Anon nodded and entered the tub with a smile, but he paused and shuddered in
delight when the water washed over his torso. “Wow, this feels good. I don’t
know if I’ll ever get out again.”

Celestia giggled while she watched Anon walk over to her, his feet bouncing
against the floor and propelling him forward. “That would be nice, but don’t
forget about the wrinkles.”

“Out of curiosity, do you know how to swim, Anon?” Luna asked.

“Not really,” he replied to her while handing the duck over to Celestia. “I can
doggie paddle but not much else.”

“This is a cute toy,” Celestia remarked while Anon sat down on the bench next to
her. “I like his little smile.”

“Yeah, I saw him in one of the stores and I thought he’d make a good little
memento of my visit to Canterlot. Since I’m going to live here now I figured I
should let him swim free.”

Celestia put the duck on the water and gave it a soft push. It floated along, as
happy as any little rubber duckie had ever been, and even Luna chuckled a bit.

“I will admit the grin is cute,” she remarked. “He will be most welcome here.”

“Anon, could you scrub between my wings?” Celestia asked, as she floated a soft,
silver colored scrub brush over to him. “Please?”

There was no way Anon was going to refuse. He took the brush and softly worked
in some soap, but then kept going onto her neck and withers. She didn’t say
anything, but the hum of satisfaction told Anon how much she enjoyed his actions
beyond what any phrase could.

While he scrubbed, Anon’s mind began to ponder what was happening at that
moment. He knew full well that Celestia’s beauty had been known for centuries.
Sonnets had been written about it, pictures had been painted on the subject, and
there was a good possibility wars had been fought over the matter. Though Luna
arguably held the advantage in dark allure and mysterious seduction, it was
Celestia who time and again was considered the consummate and preeminent example
of the Equine ideal. Every angle, every curve, every part and portion of this
Mare among mares was what defined the word ‘beautiful.’

So far, he had managed to suppress that knowledge by reminding himself that he
was associating with Princess Celestia, and that it was very uncouth, at the
least, to think of your liege in such a crude manner.

But now she was here, inches away from him. He could smell the softness of her
coat, he could feel the silk of her mane, and he could not avert his eyes from
the pure perfection that was before him. Even her very pose at the moment could
not be any more enticing; she simply sat, her body tilted slightly forward and
her wings lowered softly into the water but oh-so slightly angled to allow Anon
to scrub. Her mane was still dripping, but she had pulled it over one shoulder
and twisted it once to keep it from interfering in Anon’s work, and her head and
neck were angled down as she looked into the water before her.

Anon swallowed hard. The vision of perfection before him was his wife. Try as he
might, he could not simply call her Princess anymore and be done. By law and by
love, she was just as much his as he was hers.

And then his gaze went to his own reflection in the silver of the brush.
Granted, the image was distorted, but it still held enough truth in it to remind
Anonymous of what he really was.

A fool.

Oh, how he wished he had more strength against these feelings of doubt and
inadequacy! Celestia had told him several times that she loved him, that she
cared for him, that she found him attractive and cute.

But the reflection in the brush just simply couldn’t be all that. He had no
charms, no grace. He dark, or mysterious like Star Struck had been. He wasn’t
well built, nor did he have roguish charm or stylish mane like Shining Armor
had.

He had nothing, especially when placed next to her.

Tears started to silently trickle down his cheeks as he resumed scrubbing. Yes,
Celestia said she loved him, but how could that ever be true? He just couldn’t
comprehend it. How could the apex of Ponydom find anything attractive or
redeeming in him, a mere smudge?

“Anon, is everything okay?”

He quickly dipped his head in the water as she glanced back toward him. He
didn’t want her to see this. His tears would only make things worse.

After a moment, he pulled himself back out of the water. “Lost the brush.”

“It’s in your hand,” she gently pointed out.

“Huh, how about that?” He went back to scrubbing, and he fought against himself
to keep his emotions in check. Celestia didn’t need his insecurities on top of
everything else she needed to deal with.

“Are you sure you’re alright? I thought I heard you sniffling.”

“Yup, I’m just fine,” he said. He tried desperately to have it come out in a
normal tone, but it came out so meekly and quietly that even Fluttershy would
have been impressed.

“He likes what he is seeing right now,” Luna quipped with a devious grin.
“Garbanzo and Lima are going to get those grandfoals sooner than they think.”

Anonymous deliberately dropped the scrub brush that time and then immediately
went under after it. Why did she have to say that?! Of course he liked what he
saw, that was the whole problem!

He stayed under for a moment as he pretended to search for the brush. He could
make it through this. He could. He just had to keep those ridiculous emotions of
his in check until he could get himself back to baseline. It hurt him to think
of the hurt he would cause Celestia by not believing what she had said.

As he came back up that time, however, he felt her twist him so he came up
facing away from her. She then pulled him into a tight hug, and her breath
tickled his ear.

“Don’t block me out, Anon,” she whispered. “Talk to me. I am here to help you,
to comfort you, and to love you. You will hurt me far more if you withdraw into
yourself and push me away then you ever could by being open with me.”

She then started nipping in his hair and around his ears, and he forced himself
to enjoy what she was doing. Though his fears and insecurities remained, they
were made manageable and tolerable as she tugged and pulled and snuck quick
pecks in on his cheeks and neck.

“Why?” he finally whispered.

He felt her lips brush his ear. “Because with you, dear Love, I am home.”

He dipped his head in pure shame, and the tears flowed freely.

“Why can I not believe that?” he whispered through the tears. “Why is that so
hard for me to accept?”

“I do believe I have some moon rocks to sort,” Luna suddenly announced, and she
paddled quickly to the ramp leading out of the tub. Water cascaded in small
rivlets down her flanks and off of her mane, and a small puddle formed around
her hooves when she paused at the top and looked back at Anon. “May I offer one
bit of advice, from an old nag to a young buck?”

He nodded, and she flashed a knowing smile.

“Doubt your doubts before you doubt your love for—and of—my sister.”

She then levitated a few towels onto her barrel and began to dry herself off as
she left the room.

“She left her crown,” Anon noted.

“She’ll get it later,” Celestia replied. “We need to discuss this.”

She then released him and guided him to the built-in bench she was sitting on
herself. A wing slowly stretched out, as if to wrap around him in comfort, but
it then retreated and settled on her side.

“I hate not having the words to say what I’m feeling,” he muttered with his gaze
on his reflection in the water. “I wish I had your eloquence.”

“Sometimes there are no words for your true feelings. When people say they love
each other, it usually means something much deeper than what is generally
defined as ‘love.’”

He chuckled sadly but his gaze remained downcast. “That sounds like something
Cadence would say.”

“She may be the Princess of Love, but she had to learn the concept from
somewhere.”

“I suppose that’s true. I just…” He grunted in frustration.

“Take your time,” she offered.

“You tell me you love me. I see that you love me, I feel that you love me, and
you act as one would who is in love. But when you sway your hips at me, or when
you start bathing and don’t even try to entice me, I find I am drawn to you, but
then I remember who I really am.”

The water had settled enough that Anon could see his face within it, and he
glared at the pathetic man he saw. “I’m nothing more than a common, low-brow
yokel who has no place, right, or business in your life. Every time I take a few
little steps on that bridge over the gap between us, I remember that and I run
right back to where I am safe, and I hate myself for doing so. You, as the
perfect picture of female beauty, are weighed down and fettered with me.” A tear
slid down his cheek and ripped the water. “A human who looks like a bag of stale
popcorn.”

“Do you believe yourself to be unattractive?”

“I find it hard to comprehend that I have something you like, or that you want.
What could you possibly find enticing about me?”

“Let me first say that I am quite flattered that you consider me to be the
ultimate in beauty.” She offered a warm smile. “There are many who would
disagree with you on that point. In all honesty, Luna is probably considered to
be better looking than I am.

“But if I am understanding you correctly, you feel that you do not possess
anything that I should find attractive, and yet you believe me when I say I love
you.”

“I’m just a fun little dichotomy, aren’t I?”

“I’ll let the aren’t slide since you managed to use dichotomy in a sentence
properly. May I share something with you?”

He looked up at her and nodded sadly. “I need all the help I can get.”

“When did you first feel the embers in your heart?”

He looked down again. “That first night, when you read my henscratch. I felt…
complete, I guess. I even wanted the feeling to continue.”

“Hmm. And then yesterday, you did say you could love me despite any darkness you
found in my past.”

“I did, yes.”

“Is that still true?”

“Yes,” he quietly offered.

“Do you love me?” she flat asked.

Anon did not hesitate. “I do, yes.”

“Then remember that, when the doubts come. Luna mentioned the other day that
you’re fighting twenty-odd years of conditioning. It’s not so easy to push past
my exterior of Princess and see down to my Celly. But I think you can, and that
you will.”

“You do?”

She nodded. “Doubts are natural, Anon. If things had been different and you had
somehow married Sego Lily, they very well could have surfaced in their own way
with her. It just becomes amplified and magnified when you’re with me. It’s not
a surprise.”

“But I don’t want to keep feeling this way. I hate thinking these thoughts. It
seems like I’m betraying you all over again when I do.”

Celestia smiled. “Perhaps there is a way I can help with that. Do you trust me?”

“Of course.”

Celestia’s horn flared, and the bathroom faded out of sight. In fact, everything
left his view. He felt a small twinge of panic as he looked around for any sort
of light. “Celly? Where are you?”

“I’m right here,” she instantly replied.

“Where?”

“I am all around you. You won’t be able to see me here, so don’t try to. Feel me
instead.”

Anon decided the best way to do that was by flailing his arms in front of him.

“No, no. Not like that. Reach out with your heart. I can see you, after all.”

There was a pause for a moment as Anon tried to figure out how to do this, but
he then relaxed, and began thinking of her. He thought of her kindness, her soft
words and her smile. He thought about how he had felt when she’d raised the sun
that morning.

And slowly, he began to see her. It was blurry at first, but after a few moments
of effort he was able to bring her into focus.

But it wasn’t quite her. Before him was a unicorn, with a soft pink mane and
light grey coat. She stood at about half his height, but there was no mistaking
those eyes.

This was his beloved wife.

“There you go,” she said happily. “Notice anything different?”

“One or two things, yes.”

“This place is, in simple terms, a place of feelings. While here, you see with
your heart, not your eyes. This is the Celestia you love: the one who is just
Celly. Luna’s advice is, indeed, wise council. Doubt your doubts before you
doubt this. Your love is true, Anon, and it is right. Don’t be ashamed that you
feel inadequate. You’re not the only one.”

She then pointed down, and Anon looked. They were both standing on what appeared
to be a mirror or some other sort of reflecting surface, but the other side
showed something completely different that what he was expecting.

The reflection showed Celestia, but as an old and wrinkled mare, with dark
splotches on her sides, a grey mane and shaking knees. Her head was near the
ground and her back was bowed, but yet she still managed to look royal and
regal.

Next to her, and where his reflection was, stood a strong and noble-looking
human. Straight off the cover of some romance novel, the image was
broad-chested, with a chiseled chin, and stood taller than Celestia usually did.
Anon could hardly believe that the reflection was him. If this other human
didn’t have his green skin, he could have easily passed off the stud as one of
the innumerable nobility that he had seen in one of those fairy tales from earth
he read as a kid.

“This is how I see you, Anon: strong, firm, and handsome. You are a dedicated
and devoted man, and one who will remain faithful to me forever.”

“But you look...”

“I am old, Anon, in heart and in body. I may not look like it or act like it,
but I certainly feel it. Most of the time, I can forget that detail by diverting
my attention into work or helping my little ponies, but I never can totally
escape it. I have had moments—several moments, in fact—when I wonder why a man
like you would find an ancient geezer like me attractive. I don’t consider
myself to be the most beautiful pony in all the land, but if you do then that is
enough.

“The next time those doubts come, come back to here. Come back to when you first
knew, and to what you know. It may take years, it may take decades. But if you
will trust me, and trust your own heart, then you will eventually overcome those
doubts. Truth always wins out in the end.”

He nodded, and a grand feeling of joy spread over him as the world around them
faded away and reality came back. Once he felt like he had fully returned to the
bathroom, he saw he had turned again, his arms around his beloved Celly and hers
around him, as well as her wings. They were nose to nose, and he quickly became
captivated by those divinely magenta eyes.

“And in the most unsurprising revelation in the history of Equestria, green just
happens to be my favorite color,” she softly whispered. “To me, the shade of
your skin is the exact shade of happiness one gets from a bright summer’s day.
Don’t ever be ashamed of that.”

“Thank you,” he whispered, and his heart began thumping with delight as he felt
his lips moving towards hers.

A voice then decided to rudely cut into the serenity from behind them. “Your
Highnesses?”

“Seriously?” Celestia grunted out in a whisper, but then she put on the most
diplomatic smile Anon had ever seen, a radiant display of happy cheeks and
gleaming teeth that would have sent any diplomat screaming for home in terror.
“Yes, Wysteria? What is it?”

“I really do hate to interrupt, but you have a meeting with the Minister of
Transportation in twenty minutes.”

“We will be out momentarily.”

Wysteria wisely didn’t move, however, so Celestia released Anon and grabbed the
brush. She then gave Anon a furious scrubbing from head to feet, and he dunked
himself to rinse and thus finish the process. Celestia then handed him the brush
and lifted her wing, and Anon began scrubbing the long dark stain he’d left on
her.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw movement, and he glanced up to see Wysteria
mouthing and pointing.

Scrub where her wing meets her body.

He cocked an eyebrow, matched her slightly devious smile, and moved the brush up
to the indicated spot.

Celestia then let out a very unregal screech and leaned back. “Stop that.”

“Stop what?” he asked innocently.

Celestia glanced back at Wysteria, then leaned back in towards Anon. “I’m
ticklish right there.”

“Oh really?” he asked, and then he began scrubbing the ticklish spot furiously.

“No! Ah!” She laughed and snatched the brush from him, but he simply moved in
with his own fingers.

“Right there?! Are you sure?”

“Stop it, stop it!” she giggled furiously. “This is unfair! I can’t ge-yah!”

Wysteria smiled smugly as she left the scene of the now furious splash fight. >
20. - Meetings, Meals and Makeovers >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Wow, that was boring.” Anon couldn’t stop the truth from spilling out. “I could
also use tedious, trite, monotonous, stupefying, dull, and to get any further,
I’m going to need a thesaurus and a few minutes to find the really good words.”

“That it was, but it was also very important.” Celestia gave his cheek a kiss
before they began walking down the hall. “The wrong gravel will lead to drainage
issues and flooding, just as Minister Dusty Bottoms said.”

“Yeah, but still. Two hours to talk about rocks? And not even big rocks.
Teeny-weeny rocks just the right size and made out of just the right rock-stuff
to allow drainage without clumping or shifting. And what’s worse, I think I was
starting to understand him at the end there, just about the time my brain
started oozing out of my ears from boredom.”

“I’m afraid this is what the life of royalty is really like. There will be a
healthy amount of tedium in your days from here on out.”

“Well, I’ll just stay by you then. I bet we can liven things up together.”

“Don’t tempt me.” She giggled with him. “I believe it will take very little to
convince me to engage in your ‘nefarious’ plots.”

“Auntie Celestia! Anon!” Cadence called out from behind. The newest and yet
oldest royal couple paused, and both smiled as they turned to greet her.

“Good morning, Cadence,” Celestia warmly greeted her niece. “You seem to be
missing somepony.”

“I don’t know where he ran off to. I was actually hoping you’d seen him.”

“No, I’m afraid we haven’t,” Celestia replied, and Anon shook his head to
emphasize the point. “We’ve been in a meeting for most of the morning.”

“Where’d he go, then?” Cadence asked herself.

“I’m sure he’s around here somewhere. Have you checked with the guards?”

“A couple of them, but they haven’t seen him either. Or they’re covering for one
of his Hocus Pocus: The Get-Together games. He mentioned something about
perfecting his agro deck last week.”

“Well, he couldn’t have gotten too far away. It is possible he was called away
to deal with an issue within the ranks of his guards.”

It was just then that Sergeant Pokey rounded the corner and cleared his throat.
“Excuse me, Your Highnesses, but Captain Armor wants me to inform you that he
has lunch ready in the private gardens. He will receive you at your leisure.”

Cadence instantly went from worried to delighted. “He made lunch? That is so
sweet! He hasn’t tried to cook since the talking cake incident.”

“Talking cake?” Anon asked.

“He somehow used an animation spell on a two-layer chocolate cake he made for
me,” Cadence explained, as they all began walking with the sergeant towards the
gardens. “It was a lovely cake but it kept shouting and hurling insults at us in
Neighponese for some reason.”

“So what did you do with it?”

“Well, it wasn’t easy to find a translator, but apparently it had anger
management issues stemming from when it was just a little Bundt cake and its
cocoa father left its milk mother. We got it into some counseling, and now it’s
on a speaking tour of the Empire, sharing motivational advice and positive,
life-affirming lessons. Eventually it would like to settle down with a cute
cream puff and have some mini lava cakes of its own.”

Anon really didn’t know what to say to that.

“I told him he needed to work on his animation spells,” Celestia casually
replied. “He had a whole room of spears dancing around once with no way of
stopping them.”

“Oh, but I’m sure he’s gotten better, though. He wouldn’t have tried cooking
again if he didn’t feel confident.”

“Do you seriously have a talking cake walking around the Crystal Empire?” Anon
blurted.

Celestia bit her lower lip to hold back a snicker but Cadence remained calm.
“Why would you doubt my story, Anon?”

“Because if a cake had come to life in my house my mom would have stabbed it to
death and then my dad would have sold it for twenty percent off.”

Celestia did snicker that time.

“All right, you got me,” Cadence replied with a laugh. “The cake started
talking, yes; but as soon as it said that it was going to go straight to my hips
I cancelled the animation spell on it. Sadly, I remember it being a bit dry
too.”

Anon chuckled with the other two. “You had me worried there for a minute. I
guess Shining Armor needs to learn how to put chocolate pudding in his cake mix
and I need to learn how to be less gullible.”

“That’s not so easy, given your present company,” Cadence said. “I remember
Auntie Celestia pulling a few fast ones on me.”

“If you can be good-natured about our teasing you’ll be fine,” Celestia added.
“And you’re welcome to try to get one on us as well.”

“Right.” He gave them both a flat smile. “Nothing possibly could go wrong with
that.”

The three of them chatted about a couple of their favorite stunts and pranks as
they made their way out to the gardens. Anon was interested to find that this
little area was walled in and guarded, but yet open enough to allow perhaps
forty ponies or so at any one time. Other than that, it was a miniature of the
regular gardens: stone paths, two or three small statues, a quaint pond near the
middle, and small flower patches spread here and there. It was pleasant, and
Anon liked it.

“You know, I have been neglecting that corner of the gardens for too long.”
Celestia glanced up to Anon and gave him a smile that was brighter than her own
sun. “I think I should plant some sunflowers over there. They would be just
perfect, and add some much needed life and color.”

“I dunno,” he said with a wary grin. “There’s some weird pests that get into
them. You’ll have to be careful.”

“Mm, I think the risk is acceptable.”

More laughter came with this, and the Royals then found Shining Armor near the
pond and under a stately and shady oak tree, a large red-checkered tablecloth
beneath him. He smiled and waved once they made eye contact, and he pulled a
rather sizeable picnic basket from the side of the tree as they finished walking
over.

“Shining Armor, you stupendous stallion!” Cadence gushed. “You made us a picnic
lunch!”

“I thought I would try and give Anon some competition,” he replied, with a wide
grin. “It’s nothing fancy, but I think it’ll work.”

Cadence peered in the basket, giggled a bit, and then levitated the plates and
cutlery out as Anon and Celestia sat down together. It only took a moment for
the picnic items to be distributed, and Anon thanked Cadence when she presented
him with a fluted glass filled to the brim with freshly squeezed lemonade.




“So, Chef Armor, what exquisite cuisine have you created for our enjoyment?”
Anon asked.

“Well, I tried to channel my inner gourmet chef as I prepared this, so I have a
three-course meal.  For the appetizer, I have fried green tomatoes.”

“Oo, those look good,” Cadence remarked as Shining levitated a bowl of them out.
“You did this by yourself?”

“Chef Beet may have given me a few pointers, but I did do most of it. Please,
dig in!”

Anon took a bite, chewed thoughtfully for a moment, then forced his face to a
pleased neutral. He didn’t need to critique this, he just needed to enjoy it.

And, in fairness, they were decent. A touch on the thin side, now that he took a
good look at them, and a bit too thick on the breading. He also had used
tomatoes that were a shade too green, and they were nearly swimming in pepper.
Shining had let the frying oil get too hot, so the outside was seared dark while
the insides were barely cooked. They were crunchy little concoctions, but they
were made with love for those who he loved, and that was all that mattered.

Anon listened politely and tried not to crunch too loudly while Shining and
Cadence discussed some things relating to the Crystal Empire over with Celestia
as they ate. Production was up, and the manufacturing of crystal related items
was really beginning to take off, but the overall capacity to manufacture was
still stunted and the ability to get it to market was a concern as well. A few
ideas were thrown about on how to alleviate these problems, and Celestia also
encouraged them to work on broadening their industries so they could better
weather any potential downturns in the economy.

Then the main course came out: daisy sandwiches. Anon smirked a bit as Shining
described how he had slaved and toiled over a hot oven to make the sandwiches
perfect, but he said nothing and allowed the Captain to play it up. He didn't
like daisies, because humans and eating flowers didn't mix well, but that was
alright.

“Anon, are you okay?” Celestia asked. “You seem awfully quiet.”

“Oh, I’m fine; I’m just listening. I don’t have anything to add to a discussion
on factory output and logistical concerns.”

“Well then, let’s change the subject,” Cadence replied. “We did come here to get
to know you better, Uncle Anon.”

“And I thought Prince Anon was going to be weird to hear.” He chuckled.

“It’ll grow on you. I know! Let’s play a game.”

Shining gave his wife a knowing look. “Twenty Questions?”

She smiled at him smugly. “Twenty questions, but I think we’ll just do a couple
for today.”

Anon smiled a bit as he glanced between them. “I get the feeling this is not the
twenty questions I’m familiar with.”

“No, I’ve modified it a bit. I would play this with my new clients when I was a
foalsitter to help break the ice and to get to know the foal I was watching. I
ask a question about you and then you ask me a question. It’s a fun way to learn
about a pony, or human, and I usually gave a little toy or permission to stay up
past bedtime as a reward.”

“Can I not answer a question?”

“You can. The fun of it gets ruined otherwise.”

“All right,” Anon said with a smile. “Why don’t we all try it. This does sound
kinda fun.”

“We’ll start with you, then. What is your favorite color?”

“Well, it was red but I’m thinking I like white now,” he replied, with a smile
for his wife.

“Fair enough. Your turn now.”

“One for you, my dear Celly, and it’s one I was going to ask about yesterday.
What was with that question you asked Twilight about the square root of a
negative number?”

“Oh, that.” Celestia tittered a bit. “Twilight is a remarkable and intelligent
young mare, but she has always had a tendency to obsess and fixate on details,
as Cadence can attest to. Finally, in a fit of annoyance and desperation one day
as she was prattling on about how I needed to conduct her math review before her
first recess, I asked her that question. She ground to a stop, just like
yesterday, and we later established that question—exactly the way I phrased
it—as a signal for her to stop and to listen to me. It has been some time since
I’ve had to ask her that, though.”

“My turn to ask.” Shining smiled deviously. “Anon, did you go to public or
private school, and in either case, could you stand the meals they provided?”

“That’s two questions,” Anon noted.

“So answer twice.”

Anon rolled his eyes a bit. “All right. I went to public school, and yes, I ate
school lunch most of the time. My family being in the business they were in
meant that a home lunch was always over-complicated.

“In fact, there’s a kinda funny story with that. First day of kindergarten,
right? Little Anon is elated to go, and my parents let me make my own lunch for
the first day. I was so eager to show off what I’d made, and to see what
everyone else had, ‘cause obviously everyone works in a restaurant and has
access to premium ingredients.

“So we get to lunch. I sit down at the table, and I pull out a little napkin and
put it in my lap before I begin, all proper and neat. I then started to unpack.

“Now, of course the other kids have the usual stuff—peanut butter and jelly, hay
chips, little sandwich cookies, the like—and then Little Anon pulls out a mixed
greens salad lightly tossed in a balsamic vinaigrette dressing, a glazed
vegetable dumpling the size of my five year old hand, a small container of apple
puree—not applesauce, mind you, there is a difference—and six ounces of grape
juice that was less than twelve hours old. I remember getting it all set up,
grabbing my fork, and then finally looking around at what everypony else had. I
was shocked they all had such common fare and they were all astonished that I
had such fancy food. I think I spent most of that lunch trying to get my
classmates to pronounce vinaigrette properly.

“And the worst part?” he added as they all laughed lightly at the story. “The
worst was when I pulled out my dessert. I had a homemade pudding that was so
rich and creamy it made everyone’s mouth water, including Missus Willow’s. I had
to bring a tub of it with me the next day to share with everyone.”

“I would love to taste your pudding. Could you show me how to make it?” Celestia
asked with a sly smile.

“I’ll show you how to make it tonight, how’s that?” said Anon, trying to figure
out why Cadence was snickering into a hoof and Shining Armor had turned away to
cough vigorously into his napkin. “What did I say?”

“I’ll tell you when you’re older,” Shining replied somehow.

Anon shrugged before turning back to his wife. “Is that acceptable?” he added.

“It sounds delightful,” Celestia replied with a quick nip of his ear.

“Good. Now, let’s see.” Anon thought for a moment. “Cadence, have you ever
regretted helping two ponies fall in love?”

“No,” she cheerfully answered. “But I don’t force ponies to fall in love either.
That makes all the difference. I just help them to see what they already have.”

“Wow. Not one, not ever?”

“Not a one. Now, some relationships haven’t worked out, but even then they
stayed friends. So I haven’t had any regrets⁽*⁾.” (*) Except for the guppies.
Don’t ask about the guppies.

“I hope that continues,” Celestia remarked. “Perfect streaks are hard to
maintain, however.”

Anon somehow felt that she was speaking from some personal experience.

“It may happen one day, but even then I'll keep at it,” Cadence said.

Anon felt impressed, and he was sure it showed. Cadence’s devotion to her craft
was inspiring, to say the least.

“One from me,” Celestia stated. “Where does the phrase ‘bite the bark’ come
from?”

“Ah yes. That just bites the bark, doesn’t it?” Anon paused for a moment and
gathered the details he would need in his head. “Honestly, no one in my family
is totally sure where it came from or how it started. However, folklore tells of
an ancient family member, the first to take up a ladle and knife and to ply the
trade of cooking. He made music with mashed potatoes, soliloquies with string
beans, and a fortune from figs.

“This member of our family, however, became cocky and arrogant. As his skill
grew so did his fame, and as fame came so did ego. He soon proclaimed himself
the greatest cook that had ever been or ever would be, and that none could or
would dare challenge him. Interestingly, some versions say that you, Celly, sent
a challenger to bring this one back down to reality, though I think you would
remember if this happened.”

“It is rather amazing to see how often I commission a warrior for these sorts of
things.” Celestia smiled and tapped her chin with a hoof. “I don’t recall
sending a challenger for any cooking competitions or to eliminate rogue chefs,
but it is within the realm of possibility, I suppose.”

“Well, Celestia sent or not, a challenger did step forward. The terms were
simple: cook a better meal for a panel of judges. It would be an epic clash of
skill, and he agreed readily to the contest.

“To make a long story short, he lost. It was then he realized he’d never
bothered to find out what terms he’d agreed to, and the challenger set him to
gather and split firewood with only his teeth. He began to do so, and thus began
biting bark.

“It’s also not clear how long he had to do this, but once the lesson was learned
the challenger allowed him to stop, and from then on the phrase ‘to bite the
bark’ came to mean either dealing with an extremely uncomfortable situation or
as a reminder to avoid arrogance and pride. My parents on occasion would send me
off to school with the admonition to ‘remember not to bite the bark,’ and it was
a catchy little way to remember to be humble and friendly with others.”

“That’s a fun little story,” Cadence said with a smile.

“Now, a question for the good Captain,” Anon said.

“Uh oh,” said Captain replied while bobbing his eyebrows.

“What is the one piece of advice you would give me to help me transition into
being a prince?”

Shining nodded his head in appreciation. “Honestly? Be yourself. You’re going to
feel an immense amount of pressure to change or to be different so as to fit in
with Celestia or the nobles better, but don’t let it get to you. Celestia loves
you the way you are now. If you change in a way that is not true to yourself,
you’ll ruin the magic you share. Don’t be afraid to do Anon things and to say
Anon stuff. Don’t worry about if you’re being princely enough. Worry more about
being Anon enough.”

Anon glanced up at Celestia, who gave him a warm smile.

“He is right, there will be some who will want you to twist and contort yourself
to fit their mold and ideals. They will say you are doing a disservice to
Equestria by being Anon, that you are an embarrassment and an outrage. You’re
not. I think you are perfect just the way you are.”

“Thanks. I’ll remember that.”

A few more questions were tossed back and forth as they finished their
sandwiches, but they were light and fun in nature. Celestia, however, was
eventually forced to announce that she and Anon needed to attend to Day Court.
Before they left, however, Shining had one last part of the meal to share: fresh
brownies.

“Oo, these look good,” Cadence remarked, as Shining handed out a sizeable square
to everyone.

“I hope they are. Chef Beet said this was the absolute best recipe for brownies.
Hopefully they measure up to Anon’s.”

“Ah, but I haven’t made brownies here yet. I need to now so we… can…” Anon
squinted at the brownie in his hoof. He had given it his usual sniff for a new
food, but something smelled very wrong. He took another deep whiff, then
coughed.

“Shining, are you sure you put—”

“PLAH!” Shining spit his bite out and then began wiping his tongue with his
hooves. Celestia and Cadence were a bit more dignified about it, having calmly
lifted their napkins up, but still the offensive square came out and faces of
disgust were pulled.

“—sugar in them,” Anon concluded. “I think you grabbed the salt by mistake.”

“You get to cook from here on out,” Shining groaned as the lemonade began to
disappear quickly.





Anon chuckled a bit as he watched his love gargle yet another glass of water,
swish it around in her mouth and cheeks, and then swallow it with a “blagh”
thrown in for good measure.

“You going to be okay? I’ve lost track of how much water you’ve drunk.”

“I may be a little longer in the lavatory this evening, but I’ll be fine.”

“If you say so.”

“Bleh.” She stuck her tongue out at him for a moment. “Luna will love this when
she hears about it. Wysteria, send in the next petitioner, please.”

Two pegasus mares then entered, and both looked extremely cross. One roughly
bumped into the other as they walked up, but it was returned in kind without
hesitation.

Anon groaned inwardly. He’d seen the look they shared back home, and it always
meant that somepony was upset about their meal. They would now demand a refund,
a free meal, and an apology while kissing their hooves and begging their
forgiveness, in that order.

But how would this all work out since, by some fantastic means, he technically
was one of the supreme voices in all of Equestria? He fought back a smile as the
two pegasi bowed. No more apologizing because the carrots were slightly
overcooked for him!

“Good afternoon, my little ponies,” Celestia greeted them evenly. “What do you
have to bring before the court?”

“Your Highness, we’re here to appeal a court decision,” the mare on the right
answered.

“You’re here to appeal,” the other mare cut in. “I’m here to make sure your
appeal fails.”

“Oh, go jump in a cactus!”

“Go spit in the wind!”

Celestia lifted one hoof just a fraction of an inch, but it silenced both mares
as swiftly as if she had used her magic. “If you two can’t behave, I will
dismiss you from this court. There is no call for your behavior. Now, let’s
start with names, one at a time if you please.”

“I’m Foxglove, Princess,” the mare on Anon’s left spoke first.

“Calm Breeze, Your Highness.”

“Thank you. Calm Breeze, what is the nature of your appeal?”

“I’m contesting a ruling by a probate court on my father’s estate.”

Anon wasn’t surprised at all to hear that. Money always made for the most nasty
fights.

“I see,” Celestia replied as a guard quickly handed her a bundle of papers.
“This would be the lower court’s ruling then, yes?”

“It is.”

“Let’s see.” Celestia began skimming the first page. “The estate is that of one
Rock Bottom, Esquire, a lawyer in Barrelstown. If I am reading this right, it
says that Calm Breeze is a biological daughter, while Foxglove is a
stepdaughter. Is this correct?”

“Yes,” both mares replied.

“Very well. Calm Breeze, since you are the one making the appeal we will have
you go first. Foxglove, please go with Sergeant Pepper into the hallway, and we
will call you in to testify momentarily.”

Foxglove nodded and left, and Celestia took a slow breath in. “Let us start at
the beginning. Please explain why you are appealing this decision to Prince Anon
while I read this over.”

Anon felt a small wave of panic before remembering Celestia could multitask. He
then focused on Calm, and she cleared her throat.

“Your Highness, as was mentioned I am Rock Bottom’s biological daughter. My
mother passed away when I was four, and Father remarried two years later.
Foxglove is her daughter.”

Anon most definitely caught the note of anger in her voice. Her was fairly spat,
as if it were a brownie made with salt and bile.

“My father suffered from some kind of senility after her death, however, and my
step-sister took advantage of this fact by having his last will and testament
altered to show her as the sole beneficiary of his estate, when he had planned
to give it to me. She’s a manipulative, spoiled brat who will stop at nothing
to—”

“Ah-ah,” Anon chided. “Just the facts, please. This is not the time for
character assassination.”

“Well, she’s stolen Father’s things from me. I just want back what is mine.”

“Did your father leave literally everything to Foxglove?” Anon asked. “There
isn’t a thing for you?”

“Well, there are a couple of token items for me in the revised will, but I was
originally going to get most of everything.”

“I see,” Anon replied thoughtfully. “When was the will changed?”

“Five years ago, I think.”

“And you claim your father’s mental issues began shortly before this change,
correct?”

“Yes, Your Highness.”

“When did your stepmother pass away?”

Calm pouted. “About five years ago, Your Highness, but that’s just a
coincidence.”

Anon nodded. “I see. And your appeal requests that the revised will be revoked
and the original reinstated, yes?”

“Yes, Your Highness.”

“Thank you. If you will, please step out while we speak to Miss Foxglove.”

The mares switched, and Foxglove bowed deeply before the throne of Equestria.
“Your Highnesses, I appreciate your willingness to hear my side of this ordeal.
Calm has been harassing me ever since my mother died, and I just want this
nightmare to end.”

Anon nodded. “Why don’t you tell me how this all came to be.”

“Well, that’s a simple enough story. Calm’s mother died when she was four or so,
and Rock Bottom married my mother a couple of years later. She—my mom, that
is—had divorced my real dad a few months before this, so there’s always been
some question about my mother’s real motivations. Mother and Father truly loved
each other, though, and they had a wonderful marriage.

“So, when my mom died suddenly, Father took it really hard. I’m sure Calm told
you he suffered from some sort of mental issue, but the only thing that
afflicted him was a broken heart. He just… well, he lost the will to live, I
suppose.

“A few months before he died, Father sat down and told me about the will. He’d
rewritten it with Mother, and he explained that I would receive most of his
estate, since Calm had squandered her part already. My sister couldn’t be
bothered to visit us during Father’s last days, or for his funeral, but she
showed up real quick when she found out she didn’t have any inheritance left. I
don’t want her to steal what was left to me; she’ll just squander it on parties
and expensive clothing and whatever else she wasted her portion on while she was
in college. This is just a last-ditch effort on her part. I’m pleased the
probate court has ruled in my favor, and I’m sure Your Highnesses will too.”

Anon asked one or two more questions about Calm Breeze and her wasteful spending
habits before inviting Calm back into the throne room. The ‘sisters’ glared
daggers at each other while Celestia continued to review the court ruling with
Anon, but in low whispers, the Princess pointed out to her husband that there
was no evidence to support Calm’s case.

“Princess, please,” Calm Breeze begged after a few minutes. “I just want what’s
rightfully mine.”

“Yours?” Foxglove spat. “You spent your part already. Father was trying to
protect me, you dunderhead!”

“Look, you hag! I was doing just fine until…”

“May I remind you that you will be dismissed if your behavior is not
appropriate?” Anon stated. He wasn’t afraid to pull some authority on two
squabbling foals; he’d done it dozens of times back home.

“Cram it, Greeny!” Calm shouted back at him, her face going red in anger.
“You’re not in charge, Celestia is!”

“Enough!”

Celestia sent a pulse of magic through the throne room that pushed everypony
besides Anon and herself a foot off from where they were, and every flag and
banner in the hall snapped loudly. The two bickering mares were immediately
silenced by the outburst, and all eyes were on the Princess, who had her wings
fully flared and her head slightly bowed.

“Listen to me very carefully,” she stated, without looking up. Her tone was cold
and haunting, complete and absolute, and Anon felt a twinge of fear slink down
his own spine despite not being the one who was in trouble. “Prince Anon has
equal standing and authority with me, and I will NOT tolerate crass insults
against him in this Court. Is. That. Clear?”

“Yes, Princess,” they both meekly replied.

Celestia gave her full and undivided attention to them now, and she took on an
even more fearsome look in so doing. “Calm Breeze, I see no fault in this
ruling. Do you have any physical proof—a statement from a doctor, a notarized
document from a reliable witness, or anything of the like—that shows your father
did suffer from the symptoms you have claimed, or that he was manipulated in any
way?”

“No, I don’t.”

“Then until you can provide such, the ruling of the probate court will stand.
You are dismissed. Foxglove, please remain for a moment.”

Sergeant Pepper moved to escort Calm Breeze out, but she was pretty quick to
show herself the door. Foxglove then found herself under Celestia’s intense
stare, and she gulped loudly.

“I am disappointed.” Celestia let the silence speak for her until she moved her
head ever so slightly back and forth while taking a deep breath. “You did not
need to provoke your step-sister. The flaw in her argument was quite evident.
Egging her on like that was petty and beneath you. I was hoping that you could
offer a path of reconciliation to her instead. She is, after all, your father’s
other daughter.”

“But she wasted Father’s money!”

“There are things no amount of money can buy. A sister, for example. Luna tried
to destroy me and bring about an endless night, yet she stands now as your
Princess. For a thousand years, I would have given anything to have her back.
Anything.”

Foxglove didn’t reply to that. She couldn’t even look Celestia in the eye.

“I grant there is much about your family that I do not know, so I will not pass
judgement on your actions. I will only point out that forgiveness usually works
far better than spite. I know I am grateful I did not condemn my sister for
always and eternity because of what she did. Be willing to give Calm Breeze a
second chance.”

“All right. I can do that.”

Celestia nodded, and Foxglove was shown out. Celestia then took a very deep
breath, forced her wings down, and then smiled when Anon put a hand on her
shoulder.

“Remind me to never make you mad.”

“I may have let my anger get out of hoof slightly, but that really ruffled my
feathers when she called you greeny. You’re not anything like that.”

“I can be a bit zesty sometimes,” he offered with a waggle of his eyebrows. “And
I’ve been called worse. One bully back in middle school called me ‘piss spot’
for the longest time.”

“And you didn’t tell anypony?”

“Oh, I told. Didn’t stop him. I just accepted it one day, and I took all the fun
out of it when I responded like it was my real name.”

The humorous anecdote released the tension that had built, and Celestia giggled
with Anon a bit. “Wysteria, are there any more petitioners?”

“No, they were the last ones,” the faithful secretary said with a quick glance
down the hallway.

“Good. Let us adjourn Day Court then.”

“Your Highness?” Sergeant Pepper walked back in with a large package on his back
while the doors shut. “This just arrived from Ponyville for you.”

Celestia squealed slightly in delight, snatched the package up in her magic, and
then eagerly ripped it open. She then tilted it up and away from Anon as he
tried to peer in.

“What is that?” he playfully asked.

“Something that will help you feel more like a prince, once we deal with one
little thing,” she replied with a wide grin. “Tell me, when was the last time
you had your hair trimmed?”


 * *  ✹ * * 


“Oo, I was hoping this would come today, particularly after what happened in the
bath this morning.” Celestia giggled and clapped her hooves together gleefully.
“Are you almost done, Anon?”

“I don’t know about this,” he called back from behind the blind. “I feel like a
stuffed pepper that’s trying to pass itself off as saffron.”

“Don’t be silly. I bet you look perfect. Come out, I want to see!”

“Then why did you make me come back here?”

“So there could be a dramatic reveal! C’mon! Out, out!”

Anon then slowly stepped out. He tugged at the collar of the jacket, but then
turned to face Celestia broadside. “I look ridiculous, don’t I?”

Celestia didn’t reply. Instead, she levitated a full length mirror over from
across the room, and stood to walk over to Anon as be looked at his reflection.

“You look magnificent,” she whispered to him.

Anon did have to admit he looked good. Rarity had created an official dress coat
and matching pants for him to wear, in a regal navy blue color with a royal gold
belt and bright brass buttons running up the front that flashed brilliantly. The
coat was trimmed in white, fit him like a glove, and yet felt as soft as a
lamb’s ear against his barrel. Celestia’s solar emblem was affixed to each
shoulder on a white pad, and coupled with his Celestial Crystal he looked as
princely as anyone like him could ever hope to.



“You clean up well, too,” Celestia purred in his ear. “This is a good style on
you.”

“Are you sure? I mean, the coat is nice, but do you really think the hair is
okay? I haven’t had it this short in a long time.”

She gave him a sly look, then ran a bare hoof through it. She giggled a little
as a shudder of delight ran through him.

“Mm, yes. I’d say it works. It’s a good thing I got to you first; I’d hate to
lose this handsome Prince to Luna.”

“Naw,” he stammered. “It’s just a… just a coat, pants, and a hair cut, and…
well, y’know…”

He then turned and looked at her eagerly. “Do you really think I’m handsome?”

She smiled, and it was clear she understood his intent. He wasn’t asking because
he doubted her, he was asking because he wanted to hear her say it again.

“You were handsome before in a messy way. You are handsome now, in a cleaned up
way.” She then moved in close to his ear. “And you will be handsome to me even
when you are old and gray.”

She nipped his ear playfully, and when she pulled back he felt an extremely
dopey look spread with his joy. Anon then expressed how he felt in one word:

“Wow.” > 21. - Wysteria and Quill >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wysteria Inkwell flipped idly through the pages on her trusty clipboard,
carefully reviewing the upcoming days’ events and ensuring that she had
everything she needed to discuss with her employer. The day had been eventful,
she had to admit, but all that remained was some quick confirmations and to file
her paperwork before heading home for the evening. She was eager to slip off the
flower-faced collar she wore that established her as Princess Celestia’s
secretary, aide-de-camp, and overall right-hoof mare, warm up the leftover
broccoli salad that was in her icebox, and then to slip into her favorite plush
robe and vanish into the pages of the latest Love Lost novel.

Such was her life, and she was pleased to have it. Becoming Celestia’s secretary
had been a combination of hard work, persistence, and a bit of sheer dumb luck,
but it also entailed long days—and the occasional long night, prissy nobles with
their heads in…well, never mind that; and dealing with some of the most
frustrating and oddball circumstances one could imagine. There was prestige in
her employment, but there was also more than enough figurative mud for her to
wade through on any given day. 

Yet, Wysteria never felt like she was underappreciated, and she flipped past all
the pages on her faithful organizational tool to look at the custom engraving at
the bottom right corner.

For Wysteria, the pony who looks after me and what I treasure most.

A small smile tugged on her lips. The clipboard had been a gift from the
Princess on the fifth anniversary of her employment, and it was now one of her
most treasured possessions. It was a fine thing, made of a premium tarnish-free
silver and with Celestia’s emblem embossed on the back in colorful gemstones. It
had a spot for a spill proof inkwell, extra metal quill holders, and the
Princess had personally imbued it with an enchantment that kept it from being
lost or stolen. Of course, the three weeks extra paid vacation—which she still
had not taken—and the anniversary bonus in her paycheck had been most welcome
too, but it was touching that Celestia had taken the time to have this custom
clipboard made and to have engraved it with her own horn. 

It was the respect and appreciation that she received from her employer that had
kept her there. Her skill set was impressive enough that she could find
employment in the private sector and receive twice her current salary, but then
there would be no Princess of the Sun. Celestia was an amazing pony even from a
distance, but when one was able to work up close with her, as she had done, one
quickly saw her as far more than just a princess. She was a mentor, a teacher, a
friend and a role model of the highest quality. Celestia seemed to be able to
naturally bring out the best in anypony she interacted with, and it had so
thoroughly inspired and motivated Wysteria that she had willingly taken on more
responsibilities, even at the expense of her family, friends, or even a
potential special somepony. Celestia was the pony that others aspired to be, and
Wysteria gladly did all that she could to make sure Celestia's light could shine
as brightly as possible. 

Wysteria then shook her head while her mind drifted back to the events of the
last week. She had been beyond shocked to find that Celestia had written a law
that forced her royal self into marriage, only if the oddest circumstance
occurred, and that some stupid man had somehow managed to stumble right into it.
There had been several all-nighters involved in keeping the news from getting
out across the whole castle staff, and then to the general public. She had lied,
fibbed, stretched the truth, obfuscated, misdirected, begged, pleaded, bribed,
cajoled, whined, cried, and in one particular instance, used a little piece of
blackmail she never wanted to think about ever again. She had run herself nearly
to a nervous breakdown trying to keep ahead of the rumors and the tabloids, and
there had been more than a few times when Wysteria had begged Harmony, Fate, or
whatever had done this to help Celestia find the loophole or legality that would
get them all out of this mess and get life back to normal. 

Leave it to her boss to write a perfect, irreversible law when in a panic.
Wysteria had personally gone over it herself and couldn’t find a single fault in
it.

Wysteria's rage at the green freeloading scoundrel had multiplied tenfold on the
day of their wedding. The mere thought of her illustrious Highness being forced
to become Celestia Mous was enough to make the secretary's blood boil and her
vision go red. With Celestia’s name being debased as it was, there would no
doubt be far-reaching negative consequences, and the male menace didn’t seem to
have a clue as to what he was really doing to the whole of Equestria.

Then the divorce had come to light. She had gleefully written the decree out
with her own quill, using every single bit of willpower she had left to keep
from dotting all the i's with little smiley faces. She was a bit concerned while
taking down Celestia’s every word—she personally found the terms to be far too
generous—but she let it slide with the happy thought that this would finally
clear out the riff-raff and allow Celestia to get back to what she really needed
to focus on: her ponies.

But then he hadn’t signed it. The fool wanted to try to make the relationship
work. 

And Wysteria had been even more floored when she found out Celestia didn’t want
to sign the decree either.

What was the world coming to? Celestia should have forced him to sign it and
then thrown him out without another thought. He was naïve, he was uneducated, he
was totally unprepared to accept the role of Prince. He wasn’t even all that
attractive, either: Wysteria had rapidly summed up his looks as exotic, but not
attractive. What Celestia had seen in him was beyond her; if she was going to
marry, then she should at least find someone whose beauty matched her own. The
Baron of Fetloch, for example. Now there was a stallion, oh mama!

But Anon did stay, and Wysteria had found herself with a new boss. For the first
time in her career, she dragged her hooves and resisted following her Princess’
instruction to help Anon acclimate and to keep him on schedule with the goings
on in the palace. She was forced to work with the clown, and while she didn’t
like it to any degree she hesitantly agreed to weather the storm for the
Princess.

But then she’d talked with him, watched him work. He wasn’t anything like she
had expected, and in a good way: he was reserved, thoughtful, and observant. He
treated Celestia with deep concern and awed reverence. He actually cared about
her. And in the day-to-day grind of dealing with the royal Bundt cakes that made
up the Courts and Ministries, Wysteria found that he maintained a polite
humility that gave a blast of fresh air to everything.

And within a short amount of time, Anonymous won her over as well. What he
lacked in birthright he more than made up for in true royalty and pure
character. 

Wysteria chuckled a bit to herself as she rounded the final corner to Celestia’s
– or, now Celestia and Anon’s – chambers, and she thought about the remarkable
change that had come over her employer. Celestia was, of course, eternally
pleasant and endlessly gracious to everypony she met, but now? It was like a
switch had been flipped, and the Princess went about her days with a spring in
her step, a song in her heart and on her lips, and an overflowing dose of
happiness for everyone she encountered. She was brighter now, with more vigor
and pep than Wysteria had ever seen before. Anonymous had managed to bring out a
side of Celestia that hadn’t been seen in, well, maybe ever. 

He had brought out her youth again, and the joyful optimism that naturally came
with it.

Wysteria adjusted her glasses, made sure her papers were in order, and then
knocked on the door once before opening it  with her magic.

She paused just inside the doorway. In the middle of the room stood Anon, in a
regal-looking jacket and pants that must have been in the earlier package that
had arrived from Rarity. He was looking himself over in Celestia’s full length
mirror, and Celestia was right next to him, admiring the view and whispering
something in his ear. He did look rather proper and, yes, even royal in it, and
she had to admit that, given the right clothing, he did have a sort of
unassuming charm about him.

Celestia then pulled back, and when she saw Anon's dopey expression, it was like
… well, like he was so happy that his face could not smile enough. 

Wysteria felt her heart melt a little at the sight. No matter what it took, she
promised herself right then and there to do whatever she could to help their
love blossom and grow. A love like this deserved no less.

“Wow,” Anon remarked.

“Wow indeed.” Celestia agreed. “My dear husband, you look positively royal. I do
believe the expression on my secretary’s face says it all.”

“Wh-what?” Wysteria stammered, and her cheeks began burning. She quickly lifted
her clipboard up to block her face and her embarrassment, but again the
inscription came into sight:

…the pony who looks after me and what I treasure most.

Her smile grew bigger as the Royals chuckled. She would be most pleased to
continue to do so. 





Wysteria walked out of the Royal chambers with a happy little tune. With the
details for tomorrow now settled, she had only to file her paperwork and go
home. 

But across the hall stood Corporal Quillpoint, and after a moment of thought,
Wysteria adjusted her glasses and marched up to the gold-plated goof. 

“Good evening, Miss Wysteria. What can I do for you?” Quill asked.

“Quillpoint, I’m off in fifteen minutes. Why don’t you and I go get a drink
tonight?”

Quillpoint hesitated. Protocol said he wasn't supposed to discuss personal
things while on duty, but his eagerness to talk to her was obvious. 

“But you’ve always rejected me in the past,” he stiffly whispered. 

“Say yes or no. Going once...”

“Yes! Totally yes!” he blurted, and then he quickly sealed up the crack in his
composure.

“Great. I’ll go talk to Lieutenant Spear Point about your schedule. You should
take me somewhere classy, but not too expensive. If I see one pony with the
title of Duke, Baron, Viscount, or Prince, I'm out.”

Wysteria then trotted away with a bounce in her step and a swish to her tail
that she had not felt in years. If her boss could have a love life, why couldn’t
she? 

And in her wake, being careful not to be seen doing it, Corporal Quillpoint
punched the air in silent success, then settled back into his relaxed guarding
pose, only with a pleased smile on his face. > 22. - Do You Feel the Love? >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Anon? Where did you go?”

Celestia peered around her room. He had been sleeping so soundly and with such a
cute little smile on his face that she simply couldn’t bring herself to wake him
when she had gotten up to raise the sun.

But now he wasn’t there.

Celestia’s ears then honed in on some faint singing that was coming from her
bathroom, and she quietly snuck her way to the shower. Anon had a catchy
nonsense tune echoing off the walls, and he was belting it out without a care in
the world.

“Shoop-be-doo! Shoop shoop-be-doo!”

Celestia cringed. Anon was singing at least a full octave above where his voice
naturally was, so the song was coming out very harsh, very screechy, and very
discordant. It was bad enough that it was making her ears hurt. With a bit of
magic to mask her hoofsteps, she maneuvered in behind her husband, who was in
the midst of a vigorous lathering of his hair. She then sat behind him and
snaked her arms softly around his barrel.

“Shoop-be doo, Shoop-shoop be wooeeEEK!”

“My dear Anon, you need to drop down an octave,” she breathed into his soapy
ear. “You are most definitely not an alto.”

“You need to warn me when you’re going to do stuff like that,” he replied, with
a turn and a quick swipe of his eyes to clear the soap from his vision. Since he
was eye-level to his beloved, he wrapped his own arms around her in one swift
motion, and her wings wrapped around him in reply. “But, I must admit, the view
just got immensely better.”

“Oh? Is that so?” she tittered.

“Very,” he replied as their noses and then their foreheads touched. “I
definitely needed more Celly in here.”

“Mm, it’s a good thing I came then, unless you speak of another Celly.”

“Never.” He shook his head gently. “How could anything under your sun begin to
compete with you? It is here where I shall find completeness.”

“I like the way you talk, dear Anon,” she whispered, and her lips began to inch
towards his. “Even if your grammar is a bit rough…”

Oh, was this finally going to be it? Celestia could feel the anticipation
building as he tilted his head slightly to one side, puckered his lips, and…

…and now she was in the dining room. The dining room?

“Celly, quickly! A crime of the most heinous nature has occurred! I need your
immediate assistance!”

“Lulu, you have no idea what you’ve just done, do you?” Celestia replied with a
great deal of annoyance and more than a little dripping on the floor.

“Well, you were probably making smoochy faces in the shower with your husband,
so I do believe I am helping you get on with your day. Besides, this is a true
emergency! A national crisis!”

“All right. Who died?”

“Died? Dear sister, don’t be so morbid.”

Celestia put a hoof to her forehead. “You ran out of corn flakes again, didn’t
you?”

“Yes!” Luna pouted and sniffled. “You know how I love my corn flakes!”

“Did you check your emergency stash?”

“Yes, and they are gone as well! I believe they have been pilfered!”

“And your secondary reserve?”

“Is… well, it’s… I mean, it may or may not have been compromised, and…”

With a sigh as deep as one of the craters on Luna’s moon, Celestia teleported a
box of corn flakes from Luna’s ‘so super secret it’s almost not a secret
anymore’ stash and then shoved it into her chest roughly.

“Huzzah! Dear sister, you have redeemed the day!” Luna cheered, and she hugged
the box of cherished flakes tightly.

“Glad I could be of assistance,” she grumbled. “May I go check on my husband
now?”

“Oh yes, by all means.” Luna waved a dismissive hoof at her. “Come, Flakey.
Breakfast awaits us!”

Celestia then teleported back without further ado, but it was as she feared:
Anon was now out of the shower.

“Of all the rotten times to run out of cereal,” she muttered in ominous tones.
“Anon? Where are you?”

“I’m in here,” he called out. Celestia followed the sound of his voice out of
the shower, then promptly received a towel to the face for her efforts.

A pair of hands then began rubbing her snout with tender concern, and a
delighted smile emerged on an adorably green face while the towel moved down the
left side of her neck.

“Luna should really let you dry off before she teleports you away,” he offered.
“I bet you left a puddle wherever you were.”

“She should also not call me away for trivial matters. It seems a national
emergency is now defined by running out of one’s favorite cereal.”

“Really?” he simply asked, and Celestia nodded. “Huh. So can I do that when you
don’t make pancakes?”

“Yes,” she replied with a laugh. “I want you to shut down the entire government
until you get my pancakes.”

“Will do!” he replied with a quick salute. He then laughed with her as he kept
drying her side. “Why didn’t you wake me up today?”

“I just couldn’t. You looked so peaceful and comfortable, I couldn’t bear to
disturb you.”

“Okay. That’s a good reason, but please wake me up from now on? I like watching
you raise the sun. I can live with a little less sleep if it means more time
with you.”

“You flatterer.” She giggled. “I’ll make sure to wake you from now on.”

“Thanks.”

Anon continued his rub down at a brisk clip, but when he reached her flank he
paused and gently touched her cutie mark with his hand.

“What is it?” she asked.

“Oh, nothing. Just a dumb question.”

“The only dumb question is the one that is not asked.”

“Right. Let me rephrase and say it’s an insensitive question.”

“Anon, just ask,” she gently prodded. “I don’t think it is all that.”

“All right. Do you remember getting your cutie mark?”

She grew thoughtful, and her eyes closed. “I’m afraid I do not. It is one of
those things I wish I did remember. I know I had it before I ascended, and I
know I was confused by it for a time, but now there is a blank void in my memory
where that should be.”

“I suppose after twelve hundred years I would forget too.”

“Sadly, any significant event in one’s life can be forgotten, given enough time.
I have often thought that memories are a bit like plants: unless they are
constantly cared for, they will wither away.”

“I could see that. I’ve never understood how anyone could forget an anniversary,
but if person isn’t willing to tend to the memory and remember the special
nature of it, it just becomes plain, regular and potentially forgotten.”

“Exactly. In the end, we all have to YEOW!”

Anon retreated four or five steps and quickly wound up the towel again as
Celestia whirled and glared playfully at him. He had a delighted smirk, and then
he began dancing to his left as he held his weapon of welt production at the
ready.

“Oh, you are going to pay for that one!” she threatened with a smile and a
snort.

She then made a feint forward, but her hoof got in close enough to get caught by
the edge of the snapping towel.

 “Oh, that is it!” 





“Are there any welts left on my ass?” Anon whined.

Celestia quite thoroughly enjoyed checking Anonymous’s posterior for any
wet-towel-induced injuries once again. It had only taken her perhaps thirty
seconds to snag the towel from him—with her hooves, not her magic, thank you—and
then perhaps a minute more before she caught up to him in the hallway and rained
down unholy-yet-pleasantly-plush towel torment upon his backside. While he had
given her quite the welt from his surprise attack, he had suffered at least a
dozen retribution shots in return.

It was a good thing Celestia also knew how to heal what she had hurt.

“I don’t see anything. You should be fine,” she replied, with a slight snicker.
“Does it feel sore at all?”

“No, it feels alright. I think I should be okay.”

“I promise I’ll go easier on you next time. I’d hate to spoil the view back
here.”

Anon’s cheeks went as red as a tomato and he tried vainly to cover his whole
rear with his hands, but there simply wasn’t enough hand to complete the job.

“Oo, do that again,” she teased. “Your hands frame your rear quite nicely when
you do that.”

“Don’t we have some kind of meeting to go to?” he said while trying to keep the
squeak out of his voice.

“Alas, we do. We should have something other than corn flakes sent up to eat
while we meet with Minister Penny Wise.”

“Okay, don’t tell me.” He wrinkled his snout in thought. “Finances, right?”

“Ministry of Finance, yes. Very good!”

“She’s the only one I remember. I suppose I’ll get them all straight
eventually.”

“Wysteria should be very helpful in that regard,” Celestia replied as they
started off. “She knows all of the Ministers, their deputies, and a great many
lower managers too. If you’re ever unsure, just ask me or her.”

“I don’t envy her position.”

“It takes a special type of pony to handle the sheer amount of information she
does, and she is probably the finest Executive Secretary I’ve ever had. I only
hope she knows how much I appreciate what she does.”

“I think she does,” he said with a smile.

“You do?”

“Yeah. She’s coming up behind us and heard everything we were talking about.”

“I stand behind every word I said,” Celestia stated emphatically, and Wysteria
gave her boss a gigantic smile.

“I only ask you remember all that when my performance review comes up, your
highness. But for now, Minister Wise is running just a minute or two late but
she is coming. Prince Anon’s desk has been set up and is ready to be used, and
Prince Shining wanted me to relay that he and Princess Cadence will be out for
most of the day on, quote very urgent matters unquote.”

“Very well, I see that Cadence has developed good instincts with regard to
meeting with the Finance section also. I must remember to praise her for that
later. I presume Minister Right Angle is still sending one of her deputies to
discuss the plans from Baltimare?”

“Let me see...” Wysteria flipped through the pages of her clipboard for a moment
“um…yes. Yes, Deputy Plumb Level.”

“Excellent, thank you.”

Wysteria nodded and then trotted off to attend to her other duties. Celestia
turned back to Anon, who looked thoughtful.

“Question?” she simply asked.

“More a general statement. I didn’t know you had an office, but it makes sense
if I stop and think about it.”

“We have an office now,” Celestia replied. “But we won’t be spending a lot of
time there. It feels too much like a jail cell, and I find it to be rather
confining most of the time.”

“Yeah, I bet that sitting in a little room for hours on end gets old after a few
hundred years.”

“Having you with me will be immensely helpful though,” she said while nipping
behind his ear quickly.

“You sure I won’t be a distraction instead?” he retorted, and he swung his arm
just enough to brush her flank.

“If that is the case then it’s a good thing the door can be locked.”

Her tail smacked his butt, and she took off with a prance and a laugh while Anon
tried to recover.

“I hope I never get used to that,” Anon muttered with a grin.





Anon was bored.

Very bored.

Bored, bored, bored. He was so bored, in fact, that he was wondering if it was
possible for someone to die of boredom. If such a thing could be, then his own
life was in grave danger.

So, so bored.

“…this represents a thirty-eight percent increase in the total number of plows
purchased, suggesting the reduction in the tariff on Griffonstone had the
desired effect. It would be prudent to keep the level as is, and then to urge
the manufacturers to increase production by twelve percent by offering
incentives and…”

Anon thought backwards for a moment. Minister Wise had simply walked into the
room with a quick three-tap knock, plopped in the chair in front of Celestia,
and had launched into her prepared proposal on the budget without even so much
as a ‘good morning.’

The proposal itself had two problems for Anon: one, Minister Wise was delivering
it in the most uninteresting and monotone voice possible and two, she was using
every technical term the realm of finances had. Anon had understood about one
tenth of what she was saying, the rest of it was pure nonsense and gibberish to
him.

Questions were right out too. At the beginning he had asked one or two questions
on the parts he had understood, but this then led to her slowly turning her head
to face him—a feat that, by appearances, took a titanic amount of willpower,
dedication, and physical effort—answering the question as quickly as possible
and with an obvious attempt to use very small words so Anon’s tiny brain could
handle it, and then snapping her head back to Celestia to continue on with her
spiel.

And the mare could probably frighten small children with that glare she had. It
was making his orange juice curdle in his cup, that was for sure.

“…with a profit margin of five percent, the annual gains from this nominal
expense will be adequate to…”

He wondered how much of what she was saying was real and how much she had just
made up by using large and confusing phrases. He then began to think of all the
big words he knew, and if he could use them to pass himself off as the Minister
of Finance if he tried hard enough.

“…and that concludes my official report, your Highness. I trust that my reforms
will be put into swift action.”

“Oh, I’m sure I’ll be reviewing this with my husband, so it may take a bit.”

Wow, emotion! Anon nearly fell over in excitement as Minister Wise’s eyes
widened by several millimeters in alarm.

“Your Highness, with all due respect, this budget needs to be enacted as soon as
possible to ensure the greatest returns for the Kingdom. There simply isn’t the
time for—” her eyes narrowed and moved to the Prince “—him to review it! Please,
don’t delay this!”

“Uh huh,” Celestia replied to no one in particular as she scanned through a few
pages of the budget. “Horrible things will destroy Equestria as we know it and
reduce it to ashes if the corporate tax rate isn’t adjusted for inflation within
the next seven days. Gotcha. My Prince, what did you think about this excise tax
on wagon wheels? I’m afraid I got a little lost there.”

“Princess!”

“Lady Penny Wise, I’m sorry to disappoint you but I simply cannot authorize this
budget until I go over it with Prince Anon. Since your presentation was only to
me and did not involve him in any way, I cannot ask him to sign off on this—as
he will be required to do, if I may add—until I feel satisfied that he
understands what he is signing off on. Now, unless you have something to share
with Prince Anon, I’m afraid that we have completed everything that can be done
today. Thank you for your time.”

Minister Penny Wise grumbled her way out of the office, and Anon was a bit
worried he’d messed something up somehow.

“In case you’re wondering, you didn’t do anything wrong,” Celestia said him with
a sneaky sidelong glance. “Lady Wise does this every year. I never just sign off
on her budget proposals, but she always thinks I will.”

“That does explain a little bit but I don’t think she likes me very much.”

Celestia let out a long exhale. “She didn’t, and there will be more like her. We
can’t really expect everyone to fall in love with you as quickly as I did. There
are some who will need more convincing than others.”

“I suppose this is where Shining Armor’s advice comes into play. I need to be
myself, even if others don’t like myself right now.”

“Just remember that they will. Once others start to see what I see, they’ll come
around.”

“What you see, hmm?” he asked. “And what is it that you see?”

“I see a man.” Celestia stood, stepped around her desk, and smiled as she met
his eyes straight on.  “A man who is kind, and interesting, and wants to learn.”

She leaned in and tilted her head as her eyes ran over his lips. “I see a man
who is sweet, who flatters me, and who dares to love a Princess for what she
really is. A man who can do many great things, and who will cook many a romantic
dinner for me.”

Her heart leapt up into her throat as she leaned in a bit closer and watched his
lips begin to move towards hers. “I see a man who is winning me over with his
devotion, his adaptability, his charms, and his wholesomeness. I see a man—”
Celestia shuddered at the tickle of his breath across her own lips “—who wants
to be mine—”

“Your Highnesses?”

“So close,” Celestia whispered to him in frustration.

“So very close,” he agreed.

“Oh! If this is a bad time, I can tell Deputy Level to wait for a few moments.”

“Nope, send her in,” Celestia replied in annoyance as she sat back and Anon
hopped down. “The good feeling is gone now.”

“Sorry!” Wysteria offered. “You should lock the door if you don’t want me to
come in unannounced.”

“What a novel idea.”





“So, which is worse, having no attention or having all of the attention?”
Celestia asked playfully.

“When you have no idea what they’re talking about, I would say no attention,”
Anon replied while they both sat on the throne and waited for Day Court to
commence. “I have no idea why Deputy Level thought running over those sewer line
upgrades with me was a good idea. You’re the one who knows the project.”

“I think she was simply eager to please,” Celestia replied with a laugh. “She
wanted to make a good first impression.”

“Fine way to go about it. At least I know more about sewers now than I ever
would have before.”

“There you go.”

“Princess?” Wysteria called out. “We are ready to begin.”

“Very well. Open the doors and let us begin.”

It was done as Celestia said, and Wysteria walked up the red carpet with the
first petitioners of the day.

“Harvest Right and Barley Corn, Your Highnesses. Also, Chef Beet wants me to
tell you she has a new creation being made for your lunch: miniature cheese
calzones. She’s thinking of calling them ‘pizza rolls.’”

Anon tilted his head and gave a thoughtful hum. “A ravioli, but with bread
instead of pasta. Interesting. I’ll have to ask her how she did it.”

“They smelled good, for what it’s worth,” Wysteria offered.

“Perhaps it’s a good thing Deputy Level went over her allotted time,” Celestia
remarked, but then she turned her attention to the two earth ponies before the
throne. “Now then, my little ponies, what can we do for you?”





“…just remember to floss really well next time,” Anon admonished. “You’ll save
yourself a lot of trouble if you do.”

“I’ll remember that. Thank you, Your Highness!”

Anon smiled and nodded with his wife, and the now plucky pegasus flapped out of
the throne room with a cheerful song. “That was interesting.”

“I did try to warn you.”

“That you did.”

“Who is next, Wysteria?”

“A nice couple from the Crystal Empire, Your Highness.”

“Goodness!” Celestia put a hoof to her mouth in worry. “I hope they didn’t come
all this way because Prince Shining and Princess Cadence were unavailable!
Please, please! Show them in immediately.”

Wysteria waved to the couple in the hallway, and Anon couldn’t help but chortle
when it was, in fact, Prince Shining and Princess Cadence who walked in and
bowed before the throne.

“All right you two,” Celestia said in both amusement and wariness. “What’s going
on?”

“Oh great Celestia,” Shining began with a grand sweep of his hoof, “whose
strength binds our lands together and whose wisdom shines forth across the
oceans—”

“Seas, seas!” Cadence whispered and gave her husband a hard elbow in the ribs.
“He said seas, not oceans!”

“Right, right,” Shining quickly whispered back, and he cleared his throat.
“Whose wisdom shines forth across the seas, we thank fortune and luck that we
have been so privileged to be in your presence today.”

Anon was finding it very hard to keep his composure together. A ‘sea’ of
suppressed giggles was making a furious push against his tightly closed lips.

“But we have come here today as your humble servants, as two who seek only for
the eternal happiness and indescribable joy of our beloved diarch. We wish to
offer a present, O beloved Celestia, a simple token of our own undying gratitude
for your selfless work in our behalf.”

“If you two brought me a flower I’m going to plant you in the bush you got it
from,” Celestia warned.

“No, something even better,” Cadence replied with a massive grin. “We were able
to get tickets to the opening night of Hinny of the Hills!”

“You what?!” Celestia shouted gleefully, and she was down to them in one eager
bound.

“We may or may not have used our royal position to secure them, but you both
will love it! Box seats, a perfect view of the stage, and maybe even a romantic
double date dinner to go with it!”

Both Anon and Shining winced, along with all the other male guards in the room,
as a squeal of pure delight was unleashed upon the hapless occupants.

“I have been dying to see this!” Celestia made a little ‘squee’ noise while
Cadence showed her the tickets. “Thank you! Anon and I will be delighted to
come!”

“Good! You do have tomorrow night free, right?”

Celestia glanced over to Wysteria, who nodded. “It’s open, Your Highness. I’ve
already scheduled it in for you.”

“Thank you again,” Celestia offered. “This will be fun. Anon! You can wear your
new coat, and I know just which dress to wear. This will be such a fun night!”

She then giggled and pranced back up to her assigned seat. The two of them
booped noses and laughed, and then Celestia composed herself. “All right.
Wysteria, who’s next?”

“A Mister Silver Tongue, Princess.”

“Show him in.”

A blindingly orange pony then strode in, dressed in a tweed jacket that clashed
horribly with his coat color and with a mane that was far too slick to be real.
Anon was instantly worried about what this mess of a pony could have.

“Good afternoon, Silver Tongue. What do you have for the Court?”

“A business proposition, Your Highness. Something I think you might find to be
most interesting.”

He then pulled an old, yellowing newspaper from the pocket of his coat. “Tell
me, Prince, does this look familiar?”

Anon’s heart instantly began to hammer wildly, and he swallowed hard. “Yes, it
does.”

“Fascinating articles, aren’t they?” Silver went on, with an evil grin spreading
over his face. “The Salt Lick Picayune has some top-notch reporters. But, I must
say I found this article on page B5 to most revelatory.”

“Anon?” Celestia was looking at her husband in deep worry. “What is all this?”

“Ah, I was wondering if you had told her about this. Princess, I’m afraid your
golden knight has a bit of tarnish on his armor. He—”

His mouth kept moving, but a sudden golden shield prevented his words from
getting out. It took him a moment to realize this, but then he glared most
ferociously at the Princess.

“I don’t want to hear another word from this petitioner for right now,” she
said. “Captain Armor, keep him right there until we return.”

“Ma’am!” His salute was crisp and clean, and the shield changed from gold to
purple.

Anon was then pretty extra sure he was going to throw up as Celestia turned back
to him.

“We need to talk.” > 23. - Bad Anon >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon was having a hard time.

He was having a hard time seeing. His vision had gone unfocused and blurry, and
he was pretty extra sure the tears were a contributing factor. There wasn’t much
before him now other than outlines, vague shapes and grayscale colors.

He was having a hard time walking. His feet felt as heavy as lead, his ankles
shackled, double-bound and burning with a Tartarus spawned fire that he wasn’t
sure would ever be quenched.

His hearing was totally shot. He wasn’t sure if anyone was speaking, but it
wouldn’t have mattered. All he could hear was a thrumming, pulsing woosh that
was steadily increasing in pressure, not volume.

His mouth felt cold; the taste on his tongue raw and metallic. His jaw was
locked and his teeth were pressed so hard together that there was a distinct
possibility they would start to chip, crack and deform. His throat was as dry as
his beloved’s sun, and…

Oh, his beloved! He stumbled, staggered, nearly fell and somehow recovered as
the mere thought of his one above all nearly made his heart burst. He didn’t
know how to get through this, how to tell her. He didn’t know if he could tell
her.

He wished Luna would take pity and simply dump a meteor on top of him. That pain
would be less.

He wasn’t even sure of where he was at the moment. Had Celestia teleported him
out, or had he walked? Was he still in the palace, or even in Canterlot? Was he
in a hallway? Did it even matter?

It was at the peak of his despair that he felt something begin to sweep over
him. There was a softness over his heavy back, and a sweetness for his sour
nose. He felt surrounded by warmth, lifted by light, touched by kindness and
delivered by understanding.

“I love you, Anonymous.”

That penetrated. Through the haze, through the weight, through the darkness and
the sadness, through the unyielding crush of horror, that celestial voice
touched his soul and provided the love and the will to conquer this.

“I love you too,” he whispered.

“You’re not alone in this, my Anon. I am here, with you and for you. Forever
will I be by your side, and forever will you have my support. Whatever this is,
we will conquer it together.”

“You’ll hate me,” he replied, and he licked his teeth and lips in a vain effort
to remove the blasted, searing metallic torture from his tongue. “You’re going
to throw me out, and I’ll lose the greatest thing that has ever happened or
could ever happen to me.”

“I don’t think you’re capable of such a crime,” she replied. “Not from what I’ve
seen of you. Your disposition is one of harmony and peace. You will not be
weighed in the balance for this, nor will I ever find you wanting.”

Anon fell to his knees, but Celestia fell with him. Nothing was said, but much
was shared as Anon buried his face in her silken fur and simply wept.

It was here, in this place and in this time, that Anonymous began to comprehend
what Love really was and what it really meant. This was a moment that would
forever define all other moments that came after it.

And this changed Anonymous. He could sense that he would never fully know or
understand the how, but he knew he could never be what he once was.

He had no idea how long it took him to regain enough composure to face her. Once
he did, however, he sucked in a sob of delight when he found a magenta pair of
eyes penetrating the gray that had seized his vision.

“When you are ready, my dear Anon.”

“I don’t even know how to begin. It’s… I just…”

Her nose softy touched his. “I have found it is best to just spit it out.”

He went with that. “I was fifteen. I had just tried out for and gotten a spot on
the long distance track team, and I was eager to get to know the other ponies. I
had joined with the hopes of getting some relief from my failures in cooking,
but that’s besides the point.

“There was a team meeting the Friday after I joined. I eagerly went, hoping to
make a good first impression, and at first everypony was cool. We went over some
team news, when training and practice would be, and what was expected. I knew I
wouldn’t be a strong competitor, but I did give the team enough bodies to
compete so it didn’t matter. And then…”

His head dipped until his nose was nearly on the floor. “Then it happened.” He
paused, and sniffed loudly.

“Tell me, please,” Celestia whispered.

“It was a hazing. I was… well. I grew up around alcohol, used it all the time in
cooking. I knew full well what it did to a person, how it reacted. I can tell
you how long it would take a person to get drunk, simply based on how much they
had.

“And then, I found myself sitting there, watching in disbelief as the team
captain began passing out the liquor he’d stolen from home. It was whiskey
mostly, from what I remember. The largest bottle was passed to me, and I was
told that in order to finalize my place on the team, I had ten minutes to drink
the whole thing.

“It was impossible, and I knew it. There was no way anyone could drink that much
that fast. I told them so, refused to take any part of it, and then started to
leave.”

His tears began to fall against his will, but he fought through them. “But then
Swift Hoof, that idiot, he popped up. While the others jeered at me, he talked
me into staying, and he told me they were desperate and couldn’t afford the
loss. He reassured me it was just a dumb prank, and that I just needed to drink
as much as I could, throw up or get sick and let them laugh at me. He… he told
me they’d all done it when they’d joined, and it’s been done for decades. Just a
harmless stunt. Nothing could go wrong. They’d respect me for doing it after.
He…he…”

Anon shuddered fiercely. “The final nail was when he offered to match me, ounce
for ounce. He didn’t mind if they laughed at him too. He was the one who had
encouraged me to join the team, so he was willing to help me get through the
last part.

“I caved,” he stated, with a note of such disgust that it hung in the air,
putrid and festering. “I knew I shouldn’t, and I did. I took that bottle, I took
a glass, I poured out a shot, and I downed it.

“Things get muddled and fuzzy at that point. I honestly don’t remember how much
I drank, or really what happened. There was lots of laughing and I’m pretty sure
I threw up two or three times, but that’s about it. There’s nothing else.

“When I came to, I was in a jail cell. The police had found me behind the trash
cans at school, with a couple of empty whiskey bottles nearby, and Swift Hoof…”

Anon couldn’t talk for a moment. The emotion was just too much.

“Alcohol poisoning, they said. He, um...”

“That wasn’t your fault, my love.” Celestia’s wing pulled him in tighter, and
peace began to fight back against his depression. “What happened is as plain as
the nose on your face.”

“I’ve never been able to believe that,” he whispered. “He took the drinks
because of me. If I hadn’t… if I had just…”

“Anonymous, the what if game is a horrible game to play,” Celestia said, and he
felt her gentle touch lift his chin up so his eyes could meet hers. “If your
case had come before me, you would have been innocent. You did not force Swift
Hoof to join you, his choice was his own. Your choice was a foolish one, but it
was one brought about from the pressure of others. How many fifteen year olds
have done similar things in an effort to fit in?”

“But I knew better. I should have left, and I didn’t.”

“Perhaps. But are you sure Swift Hoof would have left with you? He might have
stayed and this all would have happened anyway.”

“It was my fault.”

“Anonymous, that may or may not be.” Celestia said in soft but firm tones. “What
truly matters is what you have done since then. Has your life been one of deceit
and criminal activity, or has it been honest and clean?”

“It’s been clean. I never had a desire to be a criminal and this incident
further drove it in.”

“Then you have learned, and you have grown because of it. Blaming yourself for
what happened will accomplish nothing. Making things better will.

“Let me tell you a story; one you may have heard before. There was once a
princess who neglected and ignored her younger sister for so long that her
jealousy turned her into a monster that was bent on destroying the sun and
bringing about an eternal night. Sound familiar?”

“A little.” He had to chuckle.

“If you add it all up, I have probably spent centuries pondering what I could
have done differently; how what happened to Luna was my fault. I was the one who
neglected her, and the argument can be made that I created Nightmare Moon with
my callousness.

“But Luna was the one who chose to turn to her anger. Whatever my part in it
was, it was ultimately her choice to do what she did. I did not force the
Nightmare upon her. She took it on herself. And whatever your part is, Swift
Hoof made his choice. Learn from it, and be better because of it.”

There was a pause as Anon closed his eyes and contemplated this. When they
opened again Celestia felt a wave of happiness when she saw the same joy
reflected in his face.

“How do you do that?” he quietly chuckled.

She booped his nose with hers. “I look at the inside of someone, and I try to
see what they really are. I then simply help them to see it too.”

“Thank you.”

She pulled back a bit and gave him a compassionate smile. “You are welcome. So
how does this incident end?”

He drew in a long breath. “Despite the urging of my parents and my attorney, I
plead guilty to the charges. I was sentenced to probation and community service,
and that newspaper article the tweed menace has is the article about my
conviction.

“However, a week later the team came forward and confessed. They had panicked
when Swift Hoof had passed out and stopped breathing, and they had taken both of
us to the school and made it look like it was just me and him.

“The captain of my team eventually received my sentence, but we all voluntarily
agreed to take community service as punishment. My conviction was expunged and
erased, and I felt so horrible about the whole thing that I just suppressed it
and forced myself to forget it. My parents never brought it up again, and
neither did anypony on the team, so we just kinda moved on, I guess. That was
pretty much the end of it there.”

Celestia gave him another boop. “How did Swift Hoof’s family handle all of
this?”

“Hoo.” He blew out a breath. “Devastated, in a word. But yet, very forgiving;
far more than they should have been, in fact.”

“Did they ever blame you for what happened?”

He thought for several moments on that one. “No, no. They never blamed anyone.”

“Then don’t blame yourself either.”

“So you don’t hate me?”

She chuckled a bit. “No, my dear Anon. I don’t hate you. I am still very much in
love with you. But here is your chance to come clean; is there anything else
you’ve done that a pony could use against you? Are there any other misdeeds or
criminal activity that I need to know about?”

“I stole a candy bar from the corner market when I was four. Dad caught me and
had me pay it back.”

“Oh, well,” she huffed, and the feathers on her wings ruffled. “I certainly
can’t associate with a four-year-old candy thief.”

“I jaywalk on occasion. But only late at night, when I was trying to get home
before curfew.”

“You are one bad Anon.” She laughed.

“Rotten to the core.” He laughed with her. It was amazing how relieving and
ennobling that laugh was. “No, I’ve never been one to break the law. I haven’t
done anything else.”

“Good,” she replied. “I didn’t get the impression that you were that type.”

“So what do we do about Mister Tweedy?”

“It’s clear this is a blackmail attempt,” she replied as they both stood. Her
wing stayed over him, though, and Anon found they were in a hallway, but it was
noticeably devoid of anypony, even guards. “He probably wants a nice payoff to
stay quiet. The problem is that this can happen again; anypony who has a
newspaper from that time could eventually reveal this. However, I think there is
a way to resolve this once and for all. It may be rather painful for you,
though.”

“I’ll do whatever I need to do. Just tell me.”





Princess Celestia strode back into the throne room with her wings locked in the
full and upright position and with righteous indignation on her face. She was
secretly pleased, however, to find that Cadence, Shining Armor, and Luna were
all standing and glaring at Silver Tongue, and Luna was giving him the most
wonderfully intimidating stare she’d ever given in her life. He was trying to
glare back, but it was fairly obvious he was questioning this choice he’d made.
Six guards also stood around him, each with either their spear or their horn at
the ready and itching for an excuse to be used. Celestia glanced over all of
them quickly before nodding to Shining Armor.

“This is an outrage!” Silver Tongue shouted as soon as the shield came down. “I
have never been so insulted! I came here to—”

“Luna?” Celestia cut him off forcefully, but her stern stare remained on him.
“Tell me, what was the penalty for blackmail against the Crown, again?”

Luna grew a evil and decidedly demented grin. “Why, as I recall, the penalty was
fifty years on the racks, Sister. Or perhaps it was fifty years in the
stockades? I always get them mixed up. Perhaps we could do both, but at the same
time! That was always fun. Do you still have my iron maiden cabinet? I could
substitute that for the stocks, if need be, but it might be a little rusty.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” Silver Tongue shot back. “I’m not doing anything wrong. I’m
just looking to ‘educate’ the Princess before the press does.”

“Oh really,” Celestia replied. “And how much would this ‘education’ cost?”

“After having been treated so poorly, I do believe the offer should be
withdrawn.”

“A marvelous idea, because here is what is going to happen. You are hereby fined
five thousand bits and ordered to serve a month in the dungeons for attempted
blackmail against the crown.”

“I’ll go public with this!” Silver threatened while holding the newspaper out.
“The ponies of Equestria have a right to know the truth!”

“They do indeed,” Celestia replied. She then began inspecting one of her shoes
quite closely as she continued. “The funny thing is, when a new prince comes
into power, the press is, naturally, very eager to interview him. So, as we
speak, Prince Anon is preparing to sit down with a rather sizeable press pool
and to lay out his history before the ponies of Equestria. By this time
tomorrow, I anticipate that every newspaper in Equestria will have a nice,
full-length article about Prince Anon, and it will be a very detailed history.
In fact, I do quite anticipate that his arrest and conviction will be covered.”

This turned a few pairs of curious eyes to her.

“Sister?” Luna managed to ask first.

“Oh yes. But I also am quite sure that his subsequent exoneration will be
covered too.”

“What?” Silver Tongue finally cracked.

“You really should be a bit more thorough when you do your homework, Mister
Silver. It would help you to avoid any embarrassing decisions. Yes, Prince Anon
was eventually found to be innocent of the charges you found in that article. He
will confess to what happened anyway, and you will have no story to share. I’m
really disappointed that you thought bribery was a good idea, however. Are you
really so desperate for money that you have to stoop to this level?”

“I am a very successful used wagon salespony, thank you very much!” he shouted
again. “And when my lawyer hears about this, you’re—”

“You know,” considered Celestia thoughtfully, “if you had thought to bring this
before a lawyer first, you would have saved yourself a considerable sum. But
since you decided not to, let’s leave the lawyers out of it this time. Think of
it as an educational experience. Professor Shining Armor, would you take our new
pupil to his classroom?”

“Let’s go,” Shining ordered. Silver Tongue continued to protest loudly while he
was escorted out, but the spears and horns provided more than enough motivation
to keep moving.

Celestia then took a deep, cleansing breath. “Wysteria? Are there any more
petitioners?”

“About a dozen at the moment, yes,” the secretary replied, then looked over her
shoulder. “Well, three now. I think the rest of them got scared away.”

“Very well. Allow me fifteen minutes to inform Cadence and Luna of the
situation, and then we’ll resume.”





“How you holdin’ up, Anon?”

Anonymous gave a sad smile to Shining Armor as he sat in the chair next to him,
graciously took the pink lemonade Shining offered, and then he drew in a long
breath. “You still want to speak to the felon, eh?”

“Don’t do that to yourself. You were young, you made a dumb decision. I think
you’ve already paid the price for it.”

“I bet you never did anything this dumb.”

“Last day of Basic,” Shining immediately responded. “I was in a class of fifteen
cadets. We were looking forward to graduation, and one of the cadets offered to
take us all out for a round in celebration. I told him no first off, but he and
the others pushed and pushed until finally I joined in.

“Anon, that night we nearly drowned three good cadets, and seven were dismissed
from the Guard. I bet I felt about as low as you did when I had to go home and
explain to my folks and to Twily what had happened. My sister nearly killed me
with that look of disappointment all by itself. That moment changed me, Anon;
but one or two more shots and I would have been explaining to my Sarge why there
were dead ponies in my platoon. You’re not the only one. Most ponies, in my
experience, have made at least one serious blunder in their life. The trick is
you realized how stupid it was. There’s plenty of ponies who never wise up to
that fact, and just keep repeating the same mistake.”

Anon inhaled deeply. “I guess so. Y’know, it was strange, and yet kinda nice to
just lay it all out there. Telling the whole story to Celly and the reporters
was… liberating, I guess.”

“I’d say that’s a good sign,” Shining replied. “But now, leave it in the past.
Don’t be constantly dragging it back to the present; it won’t do any good. It
happened, yes. Acknowledge it if it comes up again, remember what you’ve learned
from it and then move on.”

Anon hummed for a moment while he thought about that, and his vision went up to
the evening sky. “I guess so. Can’t say I ever tried to destroy Celestia and
bring about an eternal night, so Luna still has me beat.”

“Yeah, exactly. But look at where she is now. Her past does not define her
present.”

“I never really understood why nopony gave her any attention back then. I know
there were a lot of monsters or whatever, but whenever I looked up at the night
sky when I was a boy I was amazed at what I saw.

“Then when she returned! I remember going out and looking at the stars that
first night after I heard she’d returned. I mean, no offense to my wife, but
Luna is the true Princess of the Night. The stars were… I’ve never been able to
fully describe it. It was some grand celestial dance, a waltz to a scale I could
never hope to fully comprehend.

“So, I guess if she could overcome then so can I. I bet there’s some whoppers
that Celly could lay on me from her past, too.”

“And yet she’s still our Princess,” Shining offered.

“As she should be.” Anon’s glass went into the air towards Shining in a toast.
“Here’s to being stupid and giving in to peer pressure.”

“Cheers.” Shining nodded his head, clinked his glass against Anon’s, and they
both took a long drink of the pink sweetness. “And here’s to never doing it
again.”

“Hear, hear.” Anon clinked his glass again, and another long drink was shared.
“Tell you what. Let’s move on to a happier subject. It would seem that your wife
made my wife very happy with those Bridleway tickets.”

“Aunt Celly loves anything that gets her out of the palace,” Shining replied.
“She also loves anything that gets her out among her ponies. She is a social
creature, so there will be a fair amount of socializing in your future. But I
would recommend you find ways to get her out and about: museums, musicals, art
exhibits. You could probably even take her out for Nightmare Night somewhere;
she really likes going to the smaller cities and sharing in their local
customs.”

“That totally makes sense. I was a little worried myself about being stuck in
the palace too.” He looked out over the veranda in thought. “And she’s never
seen Hinny of the Hills?”

“Scheduling conflicts. She has really, really wanted to though.”

“So I gathered.” Anon chuckled. “And dinner afterward?”

“Cadence left that part up to me. So, what do you think of this…”





“That’ll be perfect, Auntie Celestia,” Cadence gushed. “He’ll be astonished.”

“I hope so. He needs something nice after today. Lulu, are you going to come
too?”

“I fear I would be a fifth wheel in your festivities,” she replied.

“Not at all! We would love to have you,” Cadence replied.

“Well, if you insist.” The Lunar Diarch laughed a little at her niece’s
enthusiasm. “I have heard good things about the play, and I am mildly curious to
see it. If I will not be a burden, then I would like to come.”

“You are never a burden, dear sister.” Celestia gave her sister a quick hug. “It
will be most delightful to have you accompany us.”

“Good evening, Wysteria!” Cadence proclaimed as the faithful secretary entered
the room. “I thought you had gone home already.”

“I was just about to, but there was one thing I wanted to check on with Princess
Celestia.”

“And what is that?” Celestia asked.

“Anonymous had asked for a dossier to be compiled on… well, himself. There’s a
team of ponies heading to Salt Lick right now to investigate his past. I’m told
it will take about two to three weeks to have the full report back.”

“Thank you for telling me, Wysteria, I didn’t know he had done that. However,
let the team carry on. I believe the Prince is doing this to prove he has
nothing else to hide, both from me and from himself. I have full confidence that
their report will be very boring indeed.”

“I’m expecting that too.” Wysteria chuckled. “Good night, Your Highnesses.”

The Princesses all bid her good night, and Luna then stood and stretched her
wings while Wysteria showed herself out.

“I should attend to my duties as well. Celly, I’ll keep an eye on his dreams
tonight. He may relive the incident, and if he starts to I will help him through
it.”

“Thank you, Lulu. I wish you an uneventful evening.”

Luna then teleported away, leaving the two Princesses to look out at their
husbands on the veranda.

“I wonder what they’re planning,” Celestia remarked.

“Dinner for tomorrow, hopefully. Shining said he would take care of it.”

“Well, since Anon is helping him I would venture to say it will be a most
wonderful date. You and I are two very lucky mares.”

“Yes we are. Now we just need to work on Twilight! Are you totally sure your law
doesn’t apply to her? I could set her up quite nicely with a special somepony if
it did.”

“My dear Cadence,” Celestia replied on a haughty tone, “while it may have worked
out for me, a flower patch is no place to find a special somepony.”

“Oh!” Cadence pouted. “But it’s so much funnier doing it your way!”

“No, no, no!” Celestia replied in the midst of both of them laughing. “No
noses!” > 24. - I Saw The Future >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Anon?” Celestia whispered into Anon’s ear with some trepidation.

“Hm?”

“Should I let you sleep longer?”

“Mm, no,” he replied. Celestia gently kissed his nose, and she felt a small
measure of relief when he chuckled. “Is it time to raise the sun?”

“Just about, yes. Are you sure you’re okay?” Celestia asked. “You were tossing
and turning all night.”

“Really, I am fine. I am a bit tired, perhaps, but I think I can shake that off
once I get moving.”

Celestia gave him a critical look. His answer had been given in a more subdued
and reserved tone than usual, and he had a contemplative and depressed demeanor
across his features. However, Celestia decided to accept his statement at face
value, and she said nothing as he trotted along obediently with her to the
balcony.

Of course, she could only stay silent for so long. “If I made pancakes, would
you like some?”

“I would,” he said, but without his usual eagerness. “But only a couple, I
think. I don’t feel very hungry right now.”

“I will make as many or as few as you like,” she replied, and he gave her an
attempt at a bigger smile that died out almost as soon as it started.

Anon’s misery clung to Celestia’s heart with a gloom she could not shake off. It
was as plain as dawn that he was depressed, but what was the answer to
overcoming it? She missed his smiles, and most of all, his constant attempts to
cook his way into her heart.

“You seem sad today, my love,” she offered.

“I do?” Anon did not turn to her as she wanted, but looked out toward the
eastern hills. “I never could hide my emotions from you. I am a little
depressed, I guess. I think I just need a little bit of time is all.”

“This is about yesterday, isn’t it?” she asked, and he nodded once.

“You should have known before. You should have heard that part of my past from
me first, not Silver Tongue.”

“Is that why you asked Wysteria to do a background check?”

“I want to make sure,” he replied. “No more surprises.”

“I hope you can surprise me a little sometimes,” she offered with a half grin.

That got a small smirk out of him. “Okay, I walked into that one. I always want
to be honest with you. This way, there will be no doubt.”

“I see. You didn’t hurt me yesterday, you know. I never asked for a detailed
history of your past, so you didn’t deliberately deceive me. I don’t imagine you
go around introducing yourself to others with ‘Guess what? I’m a former felon!’”

“That’s an interesting way to break the ice,” he chuckled, and there was a note
of mirth in it. “But you’re right. I just… I just feel bad that you found out
about my dubious history from a slick tweed jacket, not me.”

“Well, it is past us now,” she replied, and her horn lighted. “And just like how
my sunrise comes from the sunset of yesterday, we both get a new day from the
previous, one that will be much more enjoyable and filled with each other.”

“And I love that I have that,” he replied with a slightly larger smile. “With
you, I’ll be able to get through anything.”





Breakfast was a quiet affair for Anon that morning. Celestia was kind enough to
make pancakes for Shining and Cadence as well as for Anon, but his mood was
still recovering so he ate little and said less. Their time together was still
pleasant, however, and Cadence and Shining were somehow able to read his emotion
and give him some personal space, and he appreciated that they didn’t try to
push happiness on him. It would return, as it always did, and with Celestia
offering her love to him he just needed to soak it in for a bit and then he’d be
back to his old self.

After breakfast, Shining and Cadence excused themselves to allow some personal
time for Celestia and Anon, and for perhaps some more selfish reasons as well
when Anon thought about it. With most of the day now to themselves, Celestia did
ask Anon if there was anything he would like to do.

“I don’t know,” he replied in thoughtful tone. “What do you suggest?”

She gave him a warm smile. “Tell me, how is your book coming? Perhaps we can
work on that.”

“My book?” he asked. “Really? You want to work on that?”

“I do,” she replied. “What did you have planned for the second chapter?”

“Well, I… uh, I honestly don’t know. That’s where I really need the help, I
guess. I come up with a few good scenes, but I can’t connect them together.”

“I see,” she replied with a tilt of her head and a smile. “I do believe I can
help you make those connections.”

“You think so?” he asked, with a step in towards her. “And how would you help?”

“I have heard that I have inspired many poems and works of art,” she replied in
a deeply seductive tone. Her mane flowed over his chest and down his left side,
leaving him with a most pleasing technicolor view. “So, by my astounding powers
of inference, it stands to reason that I can inspire you as well.”

“I like this line of thought,” he replied softly, but with his eagerness
returning in each syllable. “Go on.”

“Of course, proper inspiration takes time.” She brushed up against his neck,
moving closer.

“We’ve got time.” He leaned back and began to lift his head. “All the time you
want.”

“And then, with you thusly inspired by your beautiful wife—” her lips snuck in
closer to his “—you will then write prose that will shake the heavens…”

“Um, Your Highnesses?”

“I’ll turn her into a potted plant,” Celestia threatened in a low and guttural
whisper. “Just watch me. She’ll be a nice ficus that we can put on our balcony
so she gets plenty of sunlight.”

“I’m sorry to interrupt, ma’am, but Captain Armor needs to speak with Prince
Anon immediately,” Sergeant Clover Leaf offered. “There’s been some sort of
complication with the reservations.”

“Naturally,” Celestia replied with only a hint of annoyance, and then she let
out a sigh so heavy the sun was in danger of being pulled off course. “You
better go see what’s going on.”

Anon nodded sadly and followed the good sergeant out of the room, but Celestia
watched him—or more specifically, his backside, and that ass!—as he left, and
she bit her lower lip.

“Soon, my love. Soon.”





“So everything has been taken care of?” Celestia asked while they walked.

“For now. Let’s try to kiss again; that’ll tell us for sure.”

She giggled at this, and leaned her head towards him. “Can you kiss and walk at
the same time?”

“Probably not,” he replied with a snort of humor. “It would be a shame if I got
hurt and we had to cancel tonight. I’m really looking forward to it.”

“You are?” she asked in amusement, and he nodded.

“I’ve said it before: there are people who would do almost anything to date you.
I am one of them. The more time I spend with you, the happier I am.”

“I can tell.” Celestia draped a wing around him and held her love against her
side, relishing the warmth and little embarrassed wriggles he made. “I’m glad I
can help you feel better.”

“Me too. Hopefully I can return the favor sometime.”

“There is no doubt in my mind that you will,” she said, with a quick nip of his
ear. “And when that time comes, I will be most grateful that it is you who will
help me.”

He nipped at her neck with that, and she giggled like a schoolfilly but made no
effort to stop him. The two of them continued to share laughs and nips until
they reached their drawing room, but Celestia got the final blow in as she bit
him on the butt a little harder than she wanted as he entered.

Anon hopped forward and let out a rather undignified squeak of alarm, leaving
him blushing furiously again from Celestia’s sneaky assault and his own
undignified response. Thankfully, Anon did receive a quick boop as payment for
enduring her enjoyable teasing, and the two of them shared a delighted smile.

“So, let’s work on that pesky chapter of yours.” Celestia settled into the
cushions, tucked her Love in her wing, and shuffled his papers in her magic.
“I’m afraid I don’t recall where you left off at, so I’ll… I’ll need to…”

One of the most delighted hums in the history of Equestria escaped out of
Celestia as Anon began gently stroking her feathers with his fingers. Purring
immediately followed, and Anon laughed a little as he worked.

“I heard once that one way to beat a mild bout of depression is to go out and do
something nice for someone else. Seems like whoever said that was on to
something.” One lone feather popped out of her wing as he rubbed, and he looked
it over for a moment before voicing another thought.

“Would you mind if I help preen your wings, my love?”

“I don’t mind one little itty bit,” she sighed in a dreamy bliss. “Preen away.”

“Quick technical question then: how?”

Anon loved hearing Celestia’s small laugh that came before her answer. “Since I
don’t fly all that often there shouldn’t be any broken ones. If you do find one
just give it a quick tug and it will come right out. It won’t hurt me either, so
don’t worry about that. Otherwise, just keep doing what you’re doing.”

“Gotcha.”

Anon worked softly and methodically on her wing, going over each inch and then
over the same inch again just to be sure. It was a relaxing affair for both of
them: Celestia was obviously in a state of serene peace and quiet enjoyment and
Anon found the gentle touch he was using felt oddly like he was bringing himself
into a balanced harmony. Once the underside was done, Celestia gently lifted her
wing to let him out, but then again relaxed into a blissful bundle of completely
relaxed princess as he worked and smoothed the upper feathers.

Anon then went top to bottom on her left wing, and there were several times he
wondered if he had put his wife to sleep. The steady pulse of her purr was both
tranquil and uplifting, so by the time he was finished his depression had been
completely banished. It was a zen unlike anything he’d ever felt before, but it
was also one he wanted to keep forever.

Anon then smiled brightly as he moved around to Celestia’s front. She blinked
her eyes rapidly for a second to reestablish her connection with reality, then
mirrored his smile back to him.

The simple “thank you” she offered held a far deeper and more intimate impact on
him than the words had any right to usually have.

“Y’know, I like this view,” he replied, and Celestia giggled a bit as he grabbed
his notebook and pencil. “Let’s see. ‘The Princess was lying on her stomach in a
relaxed and calm manner.  Her wings were fully extended and resting on the
cushions around her, and her legs were tucked in and folded to help her demure
look.’”

“Demure?” she asked.

“In the modest and reserved sense. Not a good choice?”

“Take a close look at me and then tell me I’m being demure.”

His heart took a skipping leap, and his breath hitched slightly. He eagerly
drank in the smooth and seductive lines of her form, the gentle and yet powerful
aura of her grace, and the pure appeal of her elegance.

“Maybe not demure,” he relented. “Coy would be better.”

She purred a little louder and treated him with an alluring tilt of her head.
“Coy?”

His head slowly came down towards the magnificence before him. “Coy. But since
my vocabulary is lacking, what would you recommend?”

“Kittenish,” she offered, with a tone in her voice that would make a siren
jealous of her abilities. “Coquettish in a way. Flirtatious even.”

“That last one I know,” he replied in a soft voice that was heavy with
anticipation. “Who would have thought that Princess Celestia could be so
flirtatious?”

He drew closer, two pairs of lips began to pucker yet again, but then they both
hesitated.

“Three…” Celestia offered.

“Two…” Anon added.

“One…” they said in unison.

Both of them pointed to the door, and on cue, a staccato burst of knocks
happened before Wysteria marched through it, her nose in her paperwork.

“I’m not quite sure why the universe is so against us kissing,” Celestia
remarked with a huff, and she pulled her wings back in.

“If I figure it out, I’ll let you know.” Anon offered a hand, and Celestia
gladly took it before she stood. “Maybe it will be so epic that every other kiss
will be put to shame.”

“I would love to see if that is true,” she replied with a light giggle.

“Your Highnesses,” Wysteria offered with tart terseness. “If I may interject for
a few minutes, I need you both to accompany me to the throne room so I can go
over the security details of this evening with both of you, Shining, Cadence,
and the assigned guards.”

“Is everything alright, Wysteria?” Celestia asked.

“Great! Fine! Never better! Just fine!” she snapped back. “Please follow me.”

Celestia glanced up at Anon as Wysteria turned and began leaving. His look of
confusion matched how she felt, and they both shrugged at each other before
falling in line behind her.





“…Clover Leaf and Hokey Pokey will maintain their positions here. Once the meal
is complete you will be escorted to the secured area of Saddle Park for a
standard meet-and-greet, which will end promptly at eight fifteen. You will all
then be escorted to the theater where your evening will conclude in what will
be, without a doubt, a most lovely and entertaining time.”

That had to be one of the most straightforward and clipped security summaries
Celestia had ever heard. One eyebrow was firmly in the ‘up’ category as she
regarded her secretary, who was shuffling her papers in her magic and giving a
wilting glare to one Corporal Quillpoint, who was posted at the door.

“Provided the Prince doesn’t avoid you the next day,” she muttered with a growl.
Her papers tapped on her clipboard, but her eyes remained on the guard, and
there was the threat that he would be frozen into a large guardcicle.

The hapless Quillpoint’s ears splayed back with the icy not-looking from the
secretary, and despite his efforts to maintain his composure, his face showed a
great deal of guilt and remorse. His jaw kept tightening and relaxing, as if he
was trying to offer a rebuttal to Wysteria’s remarks but was unable to do so by
virtue of his current guard status. While it was clear to most of the ponies in
the room that Wysteria’s clipped comments were intended to refer to herself and
to him, nopony dared to interject and risk the ire of the mare who had been
scorned.

Nopony except one.

“I believe we will skip the why on that one and go straight to how Prince Anon
would manage such a feat,” Celestia stated.

“Oh, no. He wouldn’t,” Wysteria replied, seeming to shake herself out the brief
slump. “My apologies. This will, undoubtedly, be a wonderful night for you both.
Romantic. Magical. Magnetic. It will be fine.” She trailed off, and the papers
began to shuffle again.

Celestia could not help but notice the confused glance that Anon and Shining
exchanged. She had a sneaking suspicion about what was going on, but it would be
best if Wysteria and Quillpoint could work it out for themselves without any
Royal nudging. After all, Wysteria had never been this sour or snippy in her
years of service, and Quill was a sensible stallion or he would never have
become a guard. All she needed to do was wait…

Corporal Quillpoint, after just a brief moment, cleared his throat. “Captain
Armor, sir?”

“Yes, Corporal?”

“Permission to speak freely, sir?”

“Granted,” Shining said with a great deal of interest. “What is it?”

“Well, I just wanted to say that Prince Anon and Princess Celestia will enjoy
their time together, I’m sure. I mean, everything had been planned out so well
that I’m sure it couldn’t be anything but. I bet they will have deep, meaningful
conversations and will make a great connection with each other.”

“If that’s true, why would he ignore her afterward?” Wysteria shot back before
anypony else could reply. “Why would he be so aloof?”

All doubt was removed at that point as to what was really going on, even for
Anon. Shining inhaled deeply and prepared himself to take over as Captain.

Thankfully, Cadence stepped in. One petite pink hoof flashed faster than the eye
could see until it was resting delicately across Shining Armor’s lips before he
could utter the first word. True to his training as a husband and a guard,
Shining gave each alicorn a sideways glance, took in the slow head shaking they
were both doing, and stayed shut up.

“Maybe… maybe he,” the Corporal glanced down at his hooves in embarrassment
“Prince Anon, that is, maybe he would have such a great time that he would think
about getting her flowers the next day, and then deliver them by hoof to her
office.”

“You were going to get me flowers?” Wysteria asked, all pretenses at third pony
references being dropped immediately with her melting heart.

“They need to talk this out,” Anon whispered to Celestia. “Why don’t we step out
of the room for a moment?”

“Not on your life.”

Anon glanced down to her just as she glanced up to him, and a small smirk
appeared on his face.

“What?” she asked. “This concerns us and our plans for tonight.”

“Well, yeah,” Quillpoint went on, oblivious to the Royal whispering. “But… but
then the Prince talked to some of his buddies at the barracks, and they said
that would look really… well, really desperate? Needy?”

Anon was completely sure he heard the mares nearest to him gasp at the audacity
of the advice. He was also mostly sure that the female guards in the room had
gasped as well.

The poor Corporal looked like he’d rather sit on a halberd at that point, but he
gave Prince Anon and Prince Armor a desperate look. “I mean, it does, doesn’t
it?”

Anon stood a bit taller, and his eyes widened in surprise. It was clear he
realized he was on extremely thin ice. He didn’t want to leave a brother
hanging, but he wasn’t sure what the appropriate answer should be. Maybe if he
faked a heart attack, or a sudden onset of laryngitis…

“Uh… maybe?” he replied half-heartedly and with trepidation. “A little? I mean,
maybe you should have brought them to the second date, but not deliver them?”

“Not quite the best answer,” Celestia whispered kindly in his ear. “Corporal
Quillpoint, there is nothing desperate about giving a nice mare flowers. It
shows us that you enjoyed the time together, and none of us would see it as
needy. I’m sure Wysteria—I mean, ‘the Princess’—would greatly appreciate such a
kind gesture and would also see it as a sign that ‘Prince Anon’ wanted to meet
with her again.”

“Really?” Quillpoint asked. “You? You really would? That wouldn’t be too
forward?”

“No!” Wysteria replied with a tear and a smile. She quickly trotted over to the
astonished guard and threw one arm around his armored neck. “Not at all! I
thought we had something good going, and the flowers would have sealed the deal!
I love flowers!”

“Corporal, why don’t you take twenty minutes and go discuss this in private,
eh?” Captain Armor said with a smirk. “I think we can survive without you for
that long.”

“Yes sir! Thank you sir!” Quillpoint immediately offered, and he laughed a
little with Wysteria as they made their way out into the hallway.

There was a bit of laughter from the Princesses with this turn of events, but
Anon leaned over to Shining with an urgent question. “So, we’re going to need to
get Celly and Cady flowers, aren’t we?”

Shining smiled and put a hoof on Anon’s legs. “No. Anon, my friend, we are
blessed with the opportunity to get them flowers.”

Anon nodded slowly as he thought for a moment. “Two dozen, do you think?”

“Anon, you can never have too many flowers. They are a delight for the eyes, a
sweet scent for the nose, and a treat for the tongue, and we are talking about
princesses here. We need three dozen per wife at a minimum.”





“That was strange,” Anon remarked, as he and his wife walked back into the
drawing room.

“Perhaps,” Celestia said with a nod. “But in my experience, love defies
normality. It has a way of overwhelming and consuming normal, and then it leaves
normal laying in a ditch somewhere wondering what hit it. With Cadence giving
them some guidance⁽*⁾ I think Quillpoint and Wysteria will have a very happy
relationship.”

⁽*⁾To be honest, keeping Cadence from giving romantic assistance to the castle
staff was a constant issue, particularly among the rapidly vanishing species of
bachelors.

“I think so too. So, since we’re on the subject and it seems like something that
I really should know, what are your favorite flowers?”

“Oh, I don’t know that I have a favorite,” she tittered. “I like all different
types. Though, if I had to admit it, I think sunflowers are making a bold move
up my list.”

“Oh really?” he laughed, as he sat but she remained standing. “I guess I could
see why. Though I have heard some ponies call it a weed.”

“If it isn’t cultivated and properly cared for, perhaps. But if treated kindly,
given good soil and lots of sunshine a sunflower can be a very remarkable flower
indeed. It just needs a little help, that’s all.”

“Good thing there are excellent gardeners around here,” he replied, and she
moved in a bit closer and started to dip her head towards him again. “Some
sunflowers might need a bit more attention than others.”

“Ah, but those often turn out to be the most wonderful sunflowers of all.
Potential is not defined by how much help one needs.”

“I’m very glad it’s not,” he replied as she inched ever closer. His world was
quickly becoming awash in Celestial pastels again and he loved it. “And I’m also
very glad that the gardener is such a beautiful one, and that she is kind, and
patient—”

His lips again began to move to hers, and his heart hammered wildly in
anticipation.

“—and forgiving, and willing to stay with the sunflower through anything…”

“Knock knock!” Shining’s voice came through the door, as he did what he said.
Celestia let out a very strong nicker of annoyance while she retreated back, and
there was a chance her glare would burn through the door and pierce the
interruptor on the other side, nephew or not.

“GAAH!” That was it! Anonymous stood up, took Celestia’s cheeks in his hands,
pulled her in quickly and planted his lips dead square on hers.

There was a brief moment of shock for the Princess, but that almost
instantaneously disappeared as the whole of existence blissfully slid into
perfect insignificance. She embraced him, he embraced her, and there wasn’t a
thing that could have mattered more at that moment to either of them.

There was no language that could adequately describe what they felt right then,
no combination of letters or words or phrases that could give the full impact of
their state of being. Time became a distant irrelevance; space nothing more than
a fleeting inconvenience. There was a vain attempt by rationality to put a tidy
description to the event: euphoria, bliss, contentment, completeness, rapture,
exultance, joyfulness, fullness and pure love.

They were all miserable failures. The scope of the moment between the Anon and
the Princess was beyond transcendence itself.

When they did finally submit to reality’s rules again, Celestia and her Anon
found themselves in the arms of one another, and her wings were wrapped securely
and warmly around him. They both giggled, laughed, and then several quick pecks
were shared between them as they celebrated this momentous occurrence. It was
Celestia who, after a few moments of this, offered her one word summary of what
had happened.

“Wow!”





Celestia could hardly keep her fillyish laughter in. They’d kissed! They’d
kissed! And it was Anon, that delightful man, who had made the move!

He was a far better kisser than he let on. Celestia had done well indeed.

Sadly, kisses did not fill the belly, and Celestia had postulated to Anon that
Shining had been trying to ask them what they wanted for lunch. It had nearly
taken a crowbar to separate the two of them from each other’s lips, but hunger
had won out—as it always did—and Celestia had told Anon to work on his book
while she went and procured food for them.

However, Celestia heard another giggling noise from somewhere down the hallway,
and curiosity set her in motion towards it.

It didn’t take long to find the source. In a small alcove near Luna’s room she
found two ponies, two whom she had hoped could reconcile their differences, and
she almost burst with happiness when she saw what they were doing.

Corporal Quillpoint was standing close to Wysteria with a easygoing smile, and
she was running her hooves up and down his breastplate while gazing into his
eyes. Somehow his helmet had ended up on her head, thus breaking the look-alike
enchantment and allowing Celestia to see his natural coloring. He had his own
set of charms, she supposed, and she could understand why Wysteria was
interested in him, but he didn’t come anywhere near the good looks of her Anon.

With a smirk, Celestia cleared her throat loudly and then gave the two of them a
playfully stern look as both of them went flush with embarrassment.




“Well!” Wysteria quickly tried to work her way out of the situation, and she
began rubbing her fetlock on his armor. “I’ll let this little violation in your
uniform slide this time, but I expect you to be perfect the next time I see you.
You’re a Royal Guard, so you should always look the part.”

“Yes, ma’am. A thousand apologies, ma’am. Won’t happen again.”

“Very well,” Wysteria sternly said, and she took a step back and Celestia
giggled furiously behind a hoof. “You’re dismissed. Carry on.”

“’I’m afraid I can’t do that, ma’am.”

“What? Why?” she asked him quickly under her breath.

“I need my helmet back.”

“Oh.”

Celestia nearly fell over laughing as Wysteria quickly removed and returned
Quillpoint’s helmet. Once the enchantment had settled in again he saluted to
Celestia, gave a wink and a nod to Wysteria, and then left with a slight spring
in his step.

“Well!” Wysteria quickly made sure her collar was straight as her horn lit and
retrieved her clipboard. “Let me see. I have your itinerary here, and everything
looks acceptable, except I haven’t heard back from the courier on—”

She dared to glance up at the princess, who was giving her a smug smile. “—on
the final…uh, final reservations, and… and please don’t fire me.”

“I wouldn’t dare. I can’t find my own tail without you,” Celestia replied in a
soft and understanding voice.

“I didn’t mean for that to happen. We were just discussing what Princess Cadence
had told us, and then one thing kinda led to the other, and…”

“Is he a good kisser?”

Wysteria found her hooves to be immensely interesting all of a sudden. “Yes?”
she squeaked out.

“I am sure you will continue to perform your duties admirably, Wysteria. You are
dedicated and loyal, and I will again state that you are the finest secretary
I’ve ever had.”

Celestia held up a hoof. “But if you would like to talk about things that are of
a more personal nature, I am here for you as well. You are my friend, after all,
and as your friend I want to help you if I can.”

Wysteria looked back up at the princess with a sheepish grin. “Do you have any
good recommendations for a second date?”

“Walk with me.” Celestia laughed with Wysteria. “I just so happen to know of two
or three.” > 25. - Date Night >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Celly, are you just about ready? Wysteria just knocked on the door and gave me
a look that either meant ‘you’re running late’ or ‘I’m feeling bloated.’”

“I certainly hope it’s the former,” Celestia said with a giggle. “I’m almost
done.”

Anon was eager to see her dress. She had been teasingly vague about what she had
selected, with no information other than it was one from a previous Grand
Galloping Gala and that he would like it; but since it was Celestia he was
pretty extra sure she’d be stunning.

Though he hoped it wasn’t brown. He had yet to see a brown dress pulled off
properly.

“So, how many dresses do you have?” he asked, mostly to make conversation while
he waited. He was admiring the way the light reflected off his Celestial Crystal
as the reply came.

“Believe it or not, I actually only have about a dozen or so. Every now and then
I round them all up and sell them at a charity auction for the low-income
families in Canterlot. They use the money to help with housing and meals and
educational needs.”

“That is pretty cool,” he replied while trying to imagine how many wealthy
socialites would actually fit in one of Celestia’s dresses. Maybe they put them
on display, or had them drastically taken in.

“All right. I’m coming out. Don’t laugh.”

“Why in Equestria would… I….”

If there was even a miniscule part of him that maybe might have made him laugh
at her dress, it was quite thoroughly decimated when Anonymous beheld his wife.

And again, to say he was both speechless and blown away was an understatement to
a degree similar to saying the sun was a little warm.

It was a sky-blue dress that fit snugly around her barrel but then flared
slightly where it went over her haunches and flank in pleated folds. Across her
chest was snug as well, but the look was actually accented quite nicely by a
golden pendant and chain that hung loosely over her shoulders. The fabric was a
material Anon was unfamiliar with, but it was no doubt costly because it had
both a slight shimmer and small sparkle effect, making the whole thing gently
beckon to him as she crossed the room.

“Well? Do you like it?” she asked.

“Duh… wuh… buh…”

She gave him a quick and gentle kiss. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

“I am so out of my league with you,” he finally remarked. “Really.”

“I wouldn’t say that,” she replied. “You have a great deal of charm yourself.”

“Yeah? Where?”

Celestia smiled and kissed his cheek. “Here. And here,” after she kissed the
other one. “Don’t sell yourself short, love. Your charm is very subtle. If I
blink, I could miss it. But when one takes the time, one finds a very pleasing
green man before her.”

Anon could feel his cheeks heat up to a rosy glow with her compliments, but he
could not complain. He was fairly sure his heart was about to burst with joy. He
twiddled one foot on the floor for a bashful moment but then offered a hand to
her. “Shall we, my princess?”

“Lead on, my prince,” she giggled, and she took him up on his offer.

They strode out of the bedroom side-by-side, hoof-in-hand and found Wysteria
impatiently waiting for them with a forced smile and and a furious tapping on
her clipboard.

“You both look nice, but we’re behind schedule,” she admonished. “The others are
waiting at the chariots for you. We need to hurry, unless you want to teleport
there.”

“You look nice too,” Anon offered.

Wysteria scoffed quite loudly. “No I don’t, but thank you.”

“No, he’s right,” Celestia added. “Black is a good color on you.”

“This is a ten bit swath of fabric I found on the clearance rack at a thrift
store. It’s as basic as you can get.”

“Sometimes the basic designs are the most flattering.”

Wysteria remained unconvinced, and her face showed it. “Well, whether or not
that it true, we need to move. I’ll debate it with you later.”

“I suppose that our opinion isn’t what really matters, after all. Somepony else
will be the one who makes the argument stick with our dear secretary.”

“Ah, you are quite right my love,” Anon cheerfully replied. “I wonder if he’s on
duty tonight.”

Anon saw Wysteria’s rock-solid stoicism falter for half a second, and her eyes
flitted to her trusty and faithful work tool. She obviously wanted to look. The
only question was if her will would hold out until after the Royal Couple was
out of sight, or if her resistance would crumble like cake.

“Go ahead and look,” encouraged Celestia with another giggle, providing an
irresistible push.

Wysteria was flipping the pages with the first syllable out of her boss’ mouth.

“He is assigned to you, isn’t he?”

“You did this, didn’t you?” Wysteria gave her employer a playful glare. “There’s
no way this just happened. Prince Shining could have expedited everything for
you, too. This is all too easy, too convenient.” She chewed on her bottom lip
for a moment, and her gaze went to the ground. “Should I have my mane up or
down?”

“Let it down,” Celestia replied. “You always have it up. Down shows you are
relaxed, comfortable, and willing to put work aside for a time.”

“Can you put yours up?” Anon asked while batting a curling bit of celestial mane
with one hoof.

“Wavy buns look very silly and the last time I did it all of the guards
laughed.”

Anon snickered at the thought of that as Wysteria quickly pulled out the pins
that held her hair up, and then began fussing with it to try and make it
presentable.

“Oh, go behind the ears,” Celestia offered. “Let him see your face and eyes.”

“Really?” Wysteria giggled happily. She did so, and both Anon and Celestia
nodded in approval.

“That is a good look.” Anon offered. “Classy, but casual too.”

“Thanks. Now move or we won’t get to see him!”

Wysteria practically began shoving them down the hallway, and the two complied
by moving up to a brisk jog with some laughter mixed in. Thankfully, the
secretary’s nerves were saved from further fraying by their rapid arrival at the
chariots, and the remaining Royals were simply chatting amongst themselves while
they waited.

Anon had to compare his own dashing look to Shining Armor, which only made him
more uncomfortable. Shining was wearing a fine red coat that was trimmed in
gold, white pearls and cufflinks, and a royal blue sash; but since Shining was
broader and had more muscle than Anon he filled the role of Prince better. That
depressing feeling of being an imposter crept back in as he glanced down at his
own blue sleeve, and he wondered if he should try adding some bulk to his own
frame.

Cadence was… well, pink. Anon would never say it aloud, but her dress was too
loose and frilly to be flattering and it was the same pink as her coat, so it
came across as an oversaturation to him. But, not his wife, not his problem. If
Shining liked it, then no other opinion mattered.

Anon did like Luna’s selection for the evening. He had expected her to go with
something in navy blue or black, but she had instead chosen a deep burgundy
color, and it highlighted her natural blues quite nicely. The train had more of
a straight and simple cut than Celestia’s, but the silver highlights along the
hem that matched her choice of a silver necklace made for a very elegant design.
She had also applied some silver eyeshadow to complete the look, and Anon
thought she looked quite nice indeed.

Celly looked better, though. By a wide margin, actually.

“About time you two showed up!” Shining joked. “We were getting ready to leave
without you!”

“I’d like to see you squeeze into this faster!” Celestia replied with a laugh.
“I could be ready in five minutes too if all I had to do is button a coat up.”

“I’m not even going to go there.” Shining chuckled.

“You were riding with us, right Lulu?”

“Indeed.” Luna nodded. “Someone needs to keep you two in line.”

“Schedule!” Wysteria admonished.


 * *  ✹ * * 


Anonymous determined he liked flying.

Granted, he probably knew this before now, but he had just made it officially
official in his own mind. Flying was definitely better when he had Celestia next
to him, with a warm wing wrapped around him and looking resplendent in a dress
that felt silky and smooth.

Admittedly, it was a damper to have his  sister-in-law on the other side of him,
making annoyed noises when he and his wife stole kisses from each other, but it
was still tolerable.

However, the kissing would soon have to stop. Manehattan was looming large in
the distance, and Anonymous sat up a bit in anticipation and excitement as they
closed in.

“Have you been to Manehattan, Anon?” Luna asked.

“Not recently. I’ve been here twice: once when I was just a kid, so I don’t
remember that; and then once when I came with my parents for a chef’s convention
when I was seventeen or so. I remember being blown away at the sheer number of
ponies crammed into one place and the insane height of the skyscrapers. I hadn’t
ever realized how small Salt Lick really was until then.”

“Just remember to remain calm, and to not act overwhelmed. You are a Prince, and
you need to portray yourself as such. The ponies of Equestria will look to you
as a bedrock foundation. You must always be so for them, for they will gain the
confidence they need to succeed in their own lives from seeing your own
exemplary example.”

“You do remember I was one of them naught but two weeks ago?”

“And did you not gain strength from Celestia’s unwavering devotion and steadfast
example?”

“Honestly, we local yokels hardly ever talked about you two or Canterlot. The
only time you got mentioned was when taxes went up and my friends and family
would say to each other ‘somepony really ought to say something’ and then do
nothing. Salt Lick was far enough out and peaceful enough that both of you never
really bothered with us, and so we never really bothered with you.”

“Well!” Luna huffed in great indignity.

“He’s got a point, you know,” Celestia replied. “Smaller towns really don’t get
a lot of our attention. We always seem to focus on the large population centers.
We wouldn’t have anything to do with Ponyville if the Elements and Twilight were
not there.”

Luna couldn’t come up with a proper argument, so she simply pouted, slumped her
shoulders, and began muttering about ‘disrespectful peasants’ under her breath.

“We should be landing in just a minute, Your Highnesses!” Sergeant Clover Leaf
shouted back.

“So where are we going to dine?” Celestia asked, with a quick nose boop for her
beloved. “You can tell me now.”

“I’m a bit surprised you didn’t see it on the itinerary. Shining and Cadence had
heard good things about a place called Le Petite Café, so we decided to try that
out. Despite the name, it’s a gourmet restaurant, so it should be decent
enough.”

“You don’t sound very thrilled.”

“Well, maybe. I think it’s more because it’s a competitor, even though they’ve
never had anything to do with the Zuerst, nor us with them. Family loyalty says
that any other restaurant is only second rate.”

“Well, I suppose we shall soon find out.”





“Your most Royal Highnesses, welcome to Le Petite Café. I am Twice Bean, and on
the behalf of the entire staff, it is my highest honor to have you here this
evening.”

“Thank you, Mister Bean!” Cadence replied for the entourage. “You are most
kind.”

“Please, follow me. We have reserved a private table for your pleasure, and we
are honored to be your waiter for this evening as well.”

Anon had to suppress a twinge of self-consciousness at the waiter’s use of we.
Obviously, he had never met Anon’s mother, and her rather strict rules on
dealing politely with customers. Far worse was the way that everypony had
quickly stood and bowed when the Royal Party had entered the restaurant, making
Anon resist the urge to look behind him for somepony else who was really
important. Once they had all been seated, their fellow patrons resumed their
meals, and Anon felt a little better when it seemed like nopony was looking
their way anymore.

Twice Bean smiled broadly. “Now, if we may be so bold, we have crafted a
culinary chef-d’œuvre for your pleasure, if you would be interested.”

“Oh?” Celestia replied this time. “Please, continue.”

“For the appetizer, Chef Wafer has chickpeas, lightly roasted and seasoned with
a signature pepper sauce of her own creation. The main course is a bulgogi tofu,
finely dressed in a spicy sesame sauce and highlighted with onions and mushrooms
we have grown in-house. For a wine, we personally recommend the Fers à Cheval
Rouillés Parfumés à la Peau de Pomme de Terrete, which I think you’ll find
compliments the dish quite admirably.”

“Oh, that does sound good,” Cadence remarked.

“How would the taste be affected if one opted to simply have mineral water for
the evening?” Luna asked.

“Water?” Twice Bean repeated. “Well, Princess, it would not be affected
dramatically, but the sweetness of—”

“I shall sample your recommendations, but with water,” Luna announced without
leaving the matter open for discussion.

“I believe I’ll follow Princess Luna’s lead and have water as well.” Anon added.

The other three agreed water was the best choice, leaving Twice Bean a bit
confused but still eager to please. Once he had disappeared into the kitchen,
Anon leaned over towards Luna with a smile.

“Thanks. I wasn’t sure how to handle that.”

She smiled back at him and nodded. “You are welcome. I suspected you would have
an issue with any wine selection offered, so I resolved to be of assistance.”

“Wait.” Anon leaned back and gave her an amused and questioning look. “You’re
being nice to me.”

“You are fulfilling your end of our bargain so I intend to honor mine. I am a
mare of my word, after all.”

“That you are,” he chuckled, but then he faced the others. “You all didn’t need
to turn it down because of me, you know. I don’t mind.”

“I’ve never really been one for wine,” Cadence replied with a grin.

“I’m trying to cut back,” Shining added with a bob of his eyebrows. “Gotta stay
in shape, be an example to my soldiers.”

“I utterly refuse to have another drop,” Celestia simply announced.

“You hardly had any drops before.” Luna pointed out.

“If my Anon doesn’t drink it, then I won’t.”

Anonymous tried to keep his smile, but the way that Celestia made her
proclamation pulled the corners of his lips down despite his best efforts.
“Celly, really. I don’t want you to give up something you like just because of
me.”

“I’m not. I am taking stand with my husband of my own free will. Just don’t take
away my apple cider.”

“No problem there,” Anon replied. “My parents have a fantastic old family recipe
for sparkling cider. I can whip some up this fall.”

This news was met with interest and enthusiasm, and Anon promised to make some
for all of them when the time was right. The conversation then turned to what
went well with apple cider and if it was better hot or chilled until the
chickpeas arrived.

Anon then simply sat back and began listening again as the conversation turned
to the budget that Celestia had been given. Luna offered the most input on the
various proposals, but Shining and Cadence were both quick to point out how
things might affect the Empire and what they would like to have done or not
done. Anon actually found the back-and-forth to be stimulating and amusing, and
he was glad it was undergoing such a vigorous discussion.

Then the main course arrived, and Anonymous finally figured out what the
difference between upscale and gourmet was.

Upscale, it appeared, was less fancy but more filling. One would obviously use
the finest ingredients at the peak of freshness, but at the end of the meal you
left feeling satisfied.

Gourmet was a fancier meal, and the fancier the meal, the less actual food,
until Anon could imagine an empty plate being served as the pinnacle of high
dining. Of course, some chef would have to top that with a plate that somehow
had a negative amount of food on it, which might actually be a unicorn spell,
now that he was thinking of it. That certainly would be better than what he had
just been served.

“Voila!” Twice Bean grandly proclaimed. “We are sure you will be delighted by
this most exquisite dish. We shall return right away with more water.”

The other Royals eagerly began eating, but Anon poked his with his fork and
tried to figure out how he could sniff it without causing a scene, or
accidentally inhaling the entire thing.

“Is there something wrong with your meal, my love?” Celestia gently asked.

“Oh, no. I was just expecting something more than a can of cat food on a
decorative plate. The sprig of parsley is a nice touch though.”

“This actually appears to be a rather generous helping,” Luna remarked.

“Right.” Anon groaned. “Well, it does look good. How does it taste?”

“It is acceptable.” Luna shrugged.

Anon took a small bite. It wasn’t bad, that was true. A bit less on the sesame
would help, and a bit more clover perhaps, but overall not bad at all.

“Does it meet your standards?” Celestia asked.

“Yeah. It’ll do.”

She gave him a quick wink. “That is good to hear. Now, would you like some
diplomacy lessons while we’re here?”

Dinner quite rapidly became very interesting. Anon nodded once, and Celestia let
out a high, tinkling laugh.

“You are just too much, my love!” she pronounced. “So, the first thing I have to
show you is how to hold a conversation within a conversation.”

“I suspect the occasional laugh is part of that.”

“Most assuredly.  When you do this, it is important to make it sound like you
are still holding a normal conversation. By sprinkling in more common terms and
phrases, and especially at the beginning and end of a statement, the bits and
pieces that your conversation that float away from you become random and
meaningless. Once you become a bit more proficient we can use the double
entendre to share all sorts of wonderful secrets.”

“Fair enough. My talkifying is common enough so all I have to do is open my
mouth and let the sounds fall out.”

“Talkifying.” Luna repeated with a laughing scoff. “What kind of a world have
you created, Sister, when someone gets away with such a blatant assault on the
equish language?”

“My dear sister, there are many words that have entered our vocabulary thanks to
those blatant assaults. I predict that within twenty years we will all use
talkifying in our everyday conversations.”

“If that happens, I’ll send myself back to the moon.”

Both Anon and Celestia shared a giggle, and then Celestia continued her lesson.
“Now, my precious, let us try this. Pick something in this room, and describe it
to me while still following the instructions I gave you. Let’s see how marvelous
you are.”

“Let me see. Let me begin with the chandelier, a rather impressive crystal…
thing. I want to say infused but it’s not that.”

“What is it then?”

“Wait.” Anon gave his wife a knowing glare. “This has nothing to do with
diplomacy. I mentioned I was having a problem describing the alternate world in
my book. This is just a way to get me to practice describing things.”

“It is both,” she replied with a smirk. “The ability to describe, compare and
contrast will prove invaluable in the future. The ability to mask what you are
saying will allow us to flirt without anypony knowing.”

“Unless we are with our present company.”

“Guards are selectively deaf, dumb, and blind,” Shining chimed. “I’ll keep my
flirting over here if you keep yours over there.”

“Deal!” Anon announced. “Celly, do you like shmoopy-doopy better or
sweetie-weety?”

Luna groaned as the two married couples began booping and nuzzling their
respective partner. “I suppose this is the penalty I pay for marrying young,”
she muttered, but with a coy glance to a nearby waiter, who looked startled and
pulled at his necktie in obvious concern.





Celestia suppressed a chuckle when yet another pony quickly trotted up and got
in line to meet the suddenly famous Anonymous. Ever since they had touched down
in Saddle Park, ponies had been flocking to both him and to Luna, and that
pleased her to no end. Anon deserved the attention, in her estimation, and the
more he got out among their little ponies, the more he would be accepted and
loved.

Most ponies who spoke with him were so astonished by the circumstances that had
put him where he was that they just had to ask if it was all true. Anon chuckled
each time and confirmed that it was, and then he would patiently answer the
dozen or so questions that came after that. Her husband was doing well, and at
this rate he would soon be as beloved as her dear sister was.

That was what made Celestia the happiest. For over a thousand years, she had
been alone in the spotlight, so she was more than happy to let those whom she
loved be the focus of the country’s praise and adoration for a change. It was
bringing flavor and zest into her life, and it made it easier to remember just
how magical friendship was.

She had been lonely for long enough.

“Excuse me, Princess, but I have something for you from the Prince.”

“What? Wysteria, what is… oh!”

Wysteria was holding a sizeable bouquet of red roses in her magic, and she
gently transferred them to the Princess with a smile.

“He was really insistent they be red, something about tasting the best,” she
remarked.

“Oh, they’re lovely.” Celestia dipped her nose into them and inhaled the sweet
aroma. “I don’t remember the last time someone gave me flowers with no political
favors attached to them.”

“I certainly don’t remember anypony doing that,” Wysteria agreed.

Celestia giggled a bit and positioned the bouquet in front of her so that the
next time Anon glanced over he would only see her eyes over the top of them. She
then began staring at him with a sultry and inviting look, hoping that he would
feel her stare and look over towards her.

It didn’t take long. Anon was telling a gray unicorn about his Celestial
Crystal, and when he glanced over at her as part of the story, she quickly
batted her eyelashes at him and tilted her head teasingly.

Anon had some red flare on his cheeks but he managed to keep his composure and
continue on with his conversation. The next time he glanced, Celestia softly bit
one of the blooms off and slowly pulled it into her mouth with her lips.  This
he chuckled at, and he shook his head slightly before focusing back on the
ponies before him. With the next glance, Celestia made a great show of licking
her lips while staring right at him. This made his cheeks nearly as red as the
roses, and he did stammer a bit before recovering and forcing his eyes forward.

And then Celestia noticed one of the guards moving towards Luna with a large
bouquet of flowers.

“Wysteria, who got those flowers for Lulu?” she asked, as she gently plucked one
full rose and placed it behind her left ear.

“Prince Anon did. It took a bit longer to find them since they’re Night Lilies,
though.”

“Night Lilies?”

“Yeah. He thought she would be appreciative of them.”

“Oh, I hope so,” she replied. “Those were the flowers she and Star Struck always
shared. It might bring up some memories she doesn’t want to recall.”

Both Celestia and Wysteria watched in hopeful concern as the guard tapped Luna
on the shoulder and then presented the arrangement. There was a gasp from Luna,
a tear escaped, but then a warm smile came as she accepted and buried her nose
in the bouquet as if she were traveling back in time by way of the scent.

And when Anon glanced over towards her, Celestia felt warm and tingly as she
watched Luna mouth ‘thank you’ to him with one Night Lily petal dangling from
her bottom lip.

“My dear Anon, you simply are amazing,” Celestia remarked to herself with a
chuckle as Luna took a lily and placed it beside her own left ear. She then met
Celestia’s gaze, gave her a nod of solid satisfaction, and turned her attention
to another pony who had come to visit with her.





“And I’m a singing pony!”

Luna tried to hide her smile behind a false facade of minor grumpiness as Anon
and Celestia’s serious expressions devolved into helpless giggles. The trip home
had been insufferable, what with them belting out all of the songs from the play
at full volume for the entire flight back home.

Of course, Shining and Cadence had done the same so she was stuck with off-key
singing no matter what. Even so, she would not trade their flat notes for the
finest choir in all of Equestria.

“Oh, my dear Anon, we simply must do this again!” Celestia laughed, an
expression of joy that Luna relished beyond all things in the world. “This was
fun, and that was a most fantastic musical! I am sure I’ll be singing ‘High
Hinny Hey!’ for the next week!”

Then again, all good things had their limits, and there was only so much off-key
joy that Luna could stand. “It has been a delightful evening, but I must tend to
my duties now. If you’ll excuse me.”

“Oh,” Celestia replied sadly, and both she and Anon pouted. “Well, good night
then, Sister.”

“Good evening.”

Luna then teleported away, but not to her quarters. She did fully intend to
attend to the dreams of her little ponies, but first she needed something to
eat. She wasn’t herself when she was hungry, and she doubted there was a gourmet
meal in the whole of Equestria that would ever satisfy her.

A quick raid of the pantry yielded a slice of chocolate cake, and Luna tried to
eat the first delectable treat with as much speed but as little sound as
possible. The second slice disappeared with seconds and without a care for the
noisy grunting she emitted as she ate, but she forced herself to slow down on
the third slice so as to properly savor it.

And yet everypony thinks Celly is the cake fanatic, Luna thought with a snicker.

Her magic then pulled the night lily from her ear, and she smiled deeply as she
looked it over. Anon probably had no idea why Luna loved them so—he had probably
picked them because they had the word night in their name—but the flood of warm
memories that had swept over her when they had been presented had helped her to
feel not quite so alone, not quite so removed from her own beloved. In fact, she
was quite pleased that Anon was able to help her remember him so often.

It didn’t hurt so much when she did.

A rattling noise at the door broke her thoughts up, and she stepped back into
the shadows to avoid detection. Who could possibly be coming into the kitchen so
late?

“Shh!” Celestia voice drifted in. “I thought I heard something.”

“Just don’t use your nose to go looking for the source,” Anon’s voice followed.

“Very funny. All right, I think the coast is clear. What can you make that’s
quick?”

“I could probably throw a salad together real quick like, just a simple one.”

“That sounds good. Those roses were delicious but it just wasn’t enough. I
think—”

“Hungry, Sister?”

Both Anon and Celestia yelped in alarm, and Luna simply laughed as they
recovered and glared at her.

“I thought you said you were going to the dream realm,” Celestia said with a
huff.

“I said I was attending to my duties. Eating is one of them.”

Anon rubbed one hoof against the opposite arm in embarrassment. “Guess I didn’t
pick the restaurant so well, huh?”

“Do not be discouraged.” Luna admonished Anon with a kind smile. “It is
difficult to find a restaurant anywhere that will offer more than what we
received. I think our subjects worry more about our weight than we do.”

“Well, next time I’ll just take you home then. My parents won’t hold back.”

“I would like to visit them sometime.” Luna smiled a bit more. “Now, did you
mention a salad? And not the kind of salad we were served at that place. One of
your salads.”

Anon beamed at the princesses. “I’ll have a nice beet salad with candied
macarana nuts whipped up in no time.”

“Celly, is the food at Anon’s restaurant any good?” Luna asked while Anon got to
work, and her sister smiled warmly.

“We didn’t get to eat an actual meal when we were there, but I assure you that
you would not leave feeling hungry based on what I saw them making.”

“But he wants to be a writer,” Luna shook her head. “I’m afraid I still don’t
quite understand why.”

“Destiny is a fickle thing, Lulu. Some people find their purpose rather quickly,
others spend a lifetime searching and never find it. If I may be a bit prideful
for a moment, I personally think that his desire to be a writer was simply the
means he needed to find the his true destiny.”

“Oh, very modest, Miss ‘I Am The End Of Your Searching.’” Luna scoffed with a
laugh. “I suppose you could be right. He would not have found you if he had been
good at running a restaurant. I suppose that this plays into your theory that
cutie marks are simply suggestions, too.”

Celestia nodded. “Perhaps it does.”

“Well, for the record, I am most pleased you have him, and that he has you. He
has proven himself to be a most devoted man, and I feel that he will be for you
what Star Struck was for me. I may still tease and torment him on occasion, but
I believe I can accept him now. You have accidentally done well for yourself.”

“Sometimes that’s the best way to go,” Celestia replied with a laugh.

A thud from the far end of the kitchen caught the sister’s attention, and both
grew curious as the sounds of a pony muttering in frustration leaked through the
open doorway.

“Shiny, they’ll hear you!” Cadence hissed. “Quiet!”

“How can they hear me? They’re at the other end of… the…”

Both of them froze as they rounded the corner and found both aunts staring at
them with amusement.

“Uh, hi?” Shining tried, with a cheesy grin.

“Good evening,” Luna replied. “What brings you by here during this most glorious
hour of my night?”

“I admit I may have not picked a very good restaurant,” Shining Armor said
sheepishly. “Cady and I are still hungry.”

“Anon!” Celestia shouted back into the kitchen “Double up that salad, and stuff
it!”

“Stuff a tree and double it!” he shouted back. > 26. - Day Break >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Celestia absolutely abhorred the sound of steel on steel.

It had a way of staying in her ears, ringing in a thunderous cacophony far
beyond the actual battle. There were times when she’d hear it for weeks after
the fight was over, an unrelenting, reverberating string of silver stings that
would drive a pony mad with enough time.

If she could work her will, she would make the source of the sound disappear
forever.

“Princess! We have another wave moving in on our left flank! We can’t hold it
much longer!”

“Stand fast! We only need to hold out for a short while yet! General Picket,
where is your Division? If we can wheel them to the left, we can—”

“Princess Celestia,” Picket cut her off with a cold and distant stare,  “I have
no division!”

Celestia could feel it. The panic, the fear. It was beginning to come to a head.

“No! You must have some ponies left! Take what you have, and wheel them to the
left!”

“I cannot take what is not there, Princess! The day is lost!”

She could feel it pushing, pounding. It wanted out. It could help. It would win.

“No! I will not!” she grunted, and her hoof tore out a large divot of earth.
“There is another way! There always is!”

She happened to catch her own reflection in Picket’s dented and smudged armor,
and she could see it in her eyes. The magenta was gone, replaced with a gold
that burned as hot as the sun.

“No!” she fought back. “I… will… not!”


~*~


Celestia gasped harshly as she awoke, and it took her a minute to reorient
herself to her surroundings. She was home, with everything as it should be. All
of her personal belongings were as they should be and untouched, and Anonymous…

A spark of panic pricked her soul, but it was silenced when she glanced down and
found him right where he should be. He snorted, gave a grunt of annoyance, then
wiggled a bit to be closer to her. Once he had settled into her side he smiled
softly and sighed in contentment.

Celestia’s smile matched his, and she drew her wing a bit tighter over him.
After a quick and gentle boop she settled in again and simply gazed at her love.

I will never let it happen, she thought to herself as the warm embrace of
slumber enveloped her again. You and I gain all the power we need from each
other.


 * *  ✹ * * 


Celestia nipped at Anon’s ear as they both laughed and entered the room. “You
realize I’m going to get an earful on that one,” she remarked. “There are going
to be dozens of ponies who ask why the sun suddenly wiggled back and forth on
the way up today.”

“Do you want me to tell everypony I found a new ticklish spot or do you?”

“I will say you distracted me,” she replied. “And then we can leave it at that.”

“Okay, but I’m remembering where that spot is.”

“You tease!” she laughed, and she nipped him again as he went for her neck.

A knock at the door interrupted their play, but they did share one quick kiss
before Wysteria walked in and adjusted her glasses. “Good morning, Your Most
Serene Highnesses.”

“Serene?” asked Anon with both eyebrows lifted. “I thought we were Illustrious.”

“It depends on if you’ve been mediatized,” said Celestia in what Anon recognized
was her teaching voice. “Technically, since I reign over the Crystal Empire, I
should be Her Imperial Highness, but I’ve always been reluctant to put on airs
like that. Plus, the nobles have been squabbling for centuries about their own
titles, so anything above Her and His Highness just gives them extra title space
to crawl into. In any event.” Celestia turned to Wysteria with a mischievous
grin. “What do you have for Your Highnesses this morning?”

“Just a few things to go over with you before breakfast. First, Play Wright
sends his profuse thanks for your attendance at the play last night, as does the
cast, and they send their thanks for your visit backstage after the performance.
They hope you will return again soon.

“Second, the Astrological Society has sent a very detailed and technical missive
about a sudden surge in solar flare activity that occurred yesterday. I won’t
even try to share everything since I don’t understand most of it myself, but
they do wish to know if you are aware of the flares and if it something that
should be concerning.”

“Solar flare, eh?” Anon ribbed her gently. “You didn’t tell me that first kiss
was that good.”

“My dear Anon, you almost made it do a backflip in the sky. It was incredible.”

“Mm, we shall have to do it again then,” he remarked with a cheesy grin.

“Anyway!” Wysteria cut in before they got carried away. “What would you like me
to tell them about the flares?”

Celestia glanced at Anon quickly before replying. “Send my thanks for their
observance, and reassure them that I am aware of them and that they are
harmless. Make sure to tell them they don’t need to worry about this morning
either. Oh, and they should expect more. Many more.”

“Got it. Let’s see.” She flipped some papers. “The Juris Prudence Center of Law
at The University of Canterlot is asking about that interview about the Alicorn
Law again. In fact, I’ve gotten a quite a few letters asking about that from
several different ponies.”

“Tell them I am planning to hold a symposium in about a month. I’d rather make
them come to me and do it all in one swift kick then to travel out to hundreds
of different places.”

“Got it. Let’s see. Oh! Prince Anon, your parents sent you a letter.”

“They did?” he eagerly asked, before snatching the letter from her magic and
ripping it open with a gleeful laugh.

“I think that covers everything for now. I need to follow up on a few things so
I’ll catch up with you later.”

“Thank you, Wysteria.” Celestia replied with a smile.

Wysteria returned the smile, then left the room while Celestia turned her
attention to Anon.

“How are they?” she asked when he finished and looked up at her.

“Extremely busy,” he said with a chuckle. “Mom says they found a line down and
around the block when they got home, and it’s been non-stop since then. They had
to hire two more cooks in a rush, but she says they should work out. They’re
thinking about moving to a larger location if they stay busy like this. She says
she’s glad they’re so busy since it helps her to not think about how much she
misses me. They also send their thanks again for your forgiveness.”

Celestia offered a quick hum of satisfaction to that. “Anything else?”

“Just that she’ll write more when she has time. It was nice of her to send this,
though. I’ll have to write back.”

“I bet she will appreciate that.”

“But I think breakfast should be first.”

“Breakfast first then,” she said with a laugh. “Are you sick of my pancakes yet?
I can whip some up if you’d like.”

“Nope, still good,” he replied. “I’m starving.”


 * *  ✹ * * 


“Oh, do you really need to go?” Celestia pouted while placing the pancakes
before everypony.

“We do,” Cadence replied with a note of sadness. “I dread to think about how
much paperwork we’ll have to go through when we get back.”

“Well, we shall simply have to come visit you then,” Celestia replied. “Perhaps
in a week or two so we can finalize plans.”

“That would be wonderful. I know the crystal ponies would love to meet Anon.”

“When do you plan to leave?”

“Around noon, I believe. We’ve already said goodbye to Auntie Luna so we can go
whenever we want, I suppose.”

“Let’s have you stay for lunch, and then Anon and I will see you off. In fact,
why don’t you spend the morning with them, Anon?”

“Are you sure?” he replied. “Didn’t we have some kind of meeting?”

“Yes, but I think I can handle it. Any meeting with the delegation from
Cloudsdale tends to be long-winded.”

“All right,” Anon replied. “If you’re sure.”

“I’m sure. Your time would be better spent with them.”

“You can come with me while I do my review of the Guard.” Shining offered.

“Review?”

“Yeah. Anytime I come to Canterlot, I touch bases with Lieutenant Spear Point to
see if I need to fix anything, and then I do a quick review of and offer a few
inspirational words to the troops. It’d be good for you to get a glimpse of how
the Guard works.”

“Ok. That actually does sound like a good idea. I’ll go with you for sure.”

“Great!” Shining replied with a small smile. “We’ll head over right after we
eat.”


 * *  ✹ * * 


“I didn’t know you participated in the review too,” Anon remarked to Cadence.

“I don’t have to, technically, but I like to stay up-to-date on what’s going
on,” she replied.  “If the worst happens, I will be the one to take over after
Shiny.”

“Which I hope never happens,” Shining added. “That means something rather
unpleasant has happened to me, Anon, Auntie Luna and Auntie Celestia.”

“Wow,” Anon said. “I hadn’t thought of that. I have to take over if something
happens to you?”

“In a way. Celestia and Luna may be your equals in government, but they do
outrank you in the military, or at least for now. If either of them give you a
commission to Major General then you’ll be of similar rank. Right now you’re my
equal at Captain.”

“Captain Anon,” he tried the title out. “Any other titles I can claim?”

“You can claim whatever you want.” Shining laughed. “But experience says less is
more, if I may suggest.”

“I think I shall take your advice.”

The three shared a quick laugh as Shining pushed open the doors for the
barracks, and Lieutenant Spear Point was waiting with a sharp salute for them as
they walked into the reception area.

“At ease, Lieutenant,” Shining ordered, as he saluted back.

“Pleasure to see you again, sir,” Lieutenant Point replied, as he hoofbumped his
superior. “Prince Anon sir, Princess Cadence ma’am. Glad to have you.”

“Thank you, Lieutenant,” Cadence replied. “How’s Needle?”

“Same as ever, ma’am.” He laughed as he motioned down a hallway with a hoof.
“She keeps telling me to lose weight, get out from behind the desk, eat
healthier. I’ll pass along your well-wishes to her.”

“Thank you.”

“Just in here, sirs,” he offered before pushing his office door open for them.
Three comfortable chairs awaited royal posteriors in front of a finely lacquered
oak desk that held Lieutenant Spear Point’s gold edged nameplate, and as Anon
settled in to the furthest left chair he glanced around. It was a nice office,
but a bit utilitarian. Of course, this was a barracks so he didn’t really expect
it to be like his office or Celestia’s drawing room.

“Well, Captain, where shall I begin?” Spear Point asked as he sat. “Troop
levels? Morale? The usual complaints about field rations?”

“Let’s start with troop levels,” Shining replied. “How are the recruitment
numbers looking?”

For the next hour, Anon sat and listened to a fascinating and completely
confusing discussion about the Royal Guard of Equestria. It was very similar to
the discussion he had been in with Minister Penny Wise in the number of terms
being thrown around that made no sense and references to things he knew nothing
about. However, Lieutenant Point did try to clarify and explain here and there
when he could, as did Shining, so by the end of the conversation Anon had at
least a sporting chance of knowing what was going on. He knew that recruitment
was up a very modest two percent, injuries were down twelve percent, and that a
change of armor wax vendors would save over six thousand bits per year. Morale
was high and holding steady, training was steady and, overall, the Guard seemed
to be doing quite well.

Lieutenant Point then offered to escort the Captain and the Royals through the
Barracks while Shining did his review. Anon was amused that the review turned
out to be really nothing more than Shining walking around and greeting any
guards who happened to be nearby, but this would also be a good way to orient
himself with the layout of the rooms and to meet those brave ponies who had
sworn to protect him and his wife from harm.

It only took ten minutes for Anonymous to get lost, much to his chagrin. It was
an honest enough mistake: he had paused for a moment to take a closer look in
the armory, but then found they had turned down a hallway without him. A quick
walk around a few corners to see if he could find them was futile, and left him
even more lost than before, so he opted for the tried-and-true method of
planting his ass where he was and then waiting for the rescue party to find him.

He was both grateful and embarrassed when he heard voices down the hallway, but
he chuckled when he figured out who they belonged to.

“You totally were!” Hokey’s laugh drifted in. “Don’t even deny it! We all saw
you checking her out!”

“I was not!” Quillpoint argued back.

“Dude, you totally were.” Clover’s voice was fast approaching. “Your eyes were
on her flank the whole night. You’re lucky no one was taking pictures of
Wysteria last night. You’d be running laps forever if someone—”

Anon winced a little when the three Guards clattered to a halt at the moment
they saw him.

“Prince Anon, sir!” All three quickly saluted.

“Clover. Hokey. Quillpoint,” he greeted each in turn, and he hoped he had given
the right name to the right pony.

“Sir,” Clover replied. “What are you doing here, sir? Can we help you with
something?”

“Well, I would be grateful if you could help me find Captain Armor and
Lieutenant Point.” He replied as he stood with an embarrassed laugh. “We were
doing a review and I got separated from them.”

“Of course, sir!” Pokey replied, and all three of them chuckled. “If they’re on
review then eventually they’ll end up in the training room. We can hook up
there.”

“Thanks.”

“Not a problem, sir. Right this way.”





“Sergeant, can I ask you something?” Anon asked while glancing around the
training room.

“Lay it on me, sir,” Pokey said.

“How hard would it be to get me in on training?”

“Training?” he repeated. “Well, you’re the Prince, so if you say ‘I want to get
Guard training’ it’ll happen.”

Anon nodded, and he looked over the room again. It reminded him of the gymnasium
back in high school with weights, a jogging track, mats for practicing
hoof-to-hoof combat on, and some other equipment that he wasn’t sure what it was
used for. A rack of staffs and blunt swords stood in one corner, and a few
guards were practicing defensive maneuvers with both against an instructor at
the far end of the room.

“Would you like me to look into it, sir?”

“Yeah. I appreciate everything you and Sergeant Leaf are willing to do for me
but I’m pretty extra sure your life would be easier if I could help defend
myself.”

“Only if you’re trained well, sir. Otherwise I’ve got to worry about a blade
behind me and a blade in front of me.”

Anon nodded in agreement but with a thoughtful look. “Think you could show me
anything right now real quick?”

“Right now?”

“Yeah. You could, right?”

“Yes sir. I was a drill sergeant for a time. I could just go over the stuff I
drill into fresh cadets. Just with less yelling and pushups.”

“Maybe I need the push-ups.” Anon glanced back and over himself. “But it might
be a bit awkward to be yelling at a prince, eh?”

“It’d be a bit like yelling at Captain Armor or Princess Celestia, sir, yes.”

“We’ll avoid yelling then,” Anon replied with a chuckle. “What can you show me,
hand-to-hoof stuff?”

“Yes sir.”

“Well, no time like the present.” Anon decided. “Doesn’t seem like Captain Armor
or Lieutenant Point are really missing me, so I might as well do something
productive.”

“Just over here then, sir,” Pokey motioned to a nearby mat.

“So, what’s first?” Anon asked once they had both stepped onto the mat.

“First, remove your crystal, sir. You don’t want to be stabbed by that.”

Anon nodded and quickly removed the Crystal, but he entrusted a few nearby
towels to keep it safe for him in the meantime.

“All right. How is your balance on your feet?”

“Prety good, I guess,” he replied.

“Not bad sir. Now, let’s have you take a swing at me.”

“What, hit you?”

“Yes sir. Don’t worry, I have a thick head.”

“If you say so.” Anon shrugged, and he half-heartedly swung his right fist at
him. Pokey blocked it easily, but he also kept it in place.

“Hold right there, don’t move. Did you see what I did, sir?”

“You blocked me?”

“Yes, but look where my hoof is,” he replied, and he wiggled his hoof a little.
“I blocked, but from here I can slide up and nail you in the side of the head,”
with a slow demonstration of what he was saying, “or I can come back down and
anticipate you coming at me from the left, or I can throw off your balance and
sweep your feet out from under you. Blocking is good, but blocking in a specific
way is better.”

“Really? How would you take me off my feet?”

“Come again, sir.”

Anon took a swing again, and he put a little more oomph into it. Pokey blocked
it again, slid his hoof to tangle up his arm, and pulled slightly. The shift in
his weight made him move his left leg, and Pokey was able to use that momentum
to flip him over and down.

“Hah! That was awesome!” Anon laughed from the floor. “How do I do that?”

“Use their weight against them, sir,” Pokey replied as he helped him back up.
“Here, I’ll swing at you this time. Make sure to—”

“Sergeant?” Cadence abruptly cut in while she trotted over to them. “What’s
going on here?”

“It’s my fault,” Anon quickly interjected while Pokey helped him back up. “I
asked him.”

“I thought you were doing the review with us,” Cadence replied to Anon, with a
hint of confusion. “What happened?”

“I got lost and turned around,” he replied softly while trying to get his
breathing under control. “The sergeant brought me here to hook back up with
you.”

“Ah, I see,” she offered a quick giggle to this. “And then you decided to get
beat up.”

“It sounded like fun at the time.”

“You boys and your macho egos,” Cadence shook her head in both amusement and
disbelief. “Well, it’s a good idea, but now is probably not the best time for
this. Lieutenant Point is rather perturbed that he lost you, and both he and
Shiny are looking for you. Let’s finish the review, then you and Sergeant Pokey
here can work out a schedule to continue your thumping.”

“All right.”

“Grab your Crystal and let’s hurry back. If we find them first we might be able
to defuse some of Lieutenant Point’s ire.”

Anon quickly did as he was told, then fell in. next to Cadence. She gave him a
quick, reassuring smile, but then had a devious look take over. “You know,
Auntie Celestia is one of the supreme commanders of the Guard, and not just
because she’s the princess. I bet if you asked her nicely, she could give you
some pointers as well.”

“She could, couldn’t she?” he replied with a thoughtful expression. “Maybe I
will then.”

“I know I like to work out with Shiny. I bet she would like to work out with you
as well.”





Thankfully, Cadence was correct in her prediction about Lieutenant Spear Point.
He was irritated over what had happened, and it was obvious in both his body
language and from his clipped responses as they finished the review, but Shining
had leaned over with a smirk and whispered that he was more irritated with
himself since the barracks should be one of the most secure areas of the entire
palace, and yet Anon had slipped away from him and had to be rescued. His ire
did slowly taper out as they progressed, so by the time the review was finished
and they had met up with Celestia for lunch he was somewhat back to what Anon
thought would be normal.

His Royal Lostness, in an effort to not cause any more problems, stayed quiet
and only replied if somepony spoke to him. He did receive a fair share of
worried glances from his wife, but he met each one with a smile and that seemed
to placate her, if only temporarily.

After lunch, Anon and Celestia escorted Shining and Cadence to the carriage that
would deliver them to the train. Anon fought down a twinge of sadness when they
hugged and said their good-byes, and he hoped they could make that visit to the
Crystal Empire soon. Shining Armor had been an immense help and a good friend,
and Cadence was just as sweet and kind as rumors had said she was.

“Oh, I always hate goodbye,” Celestia remarked as she and Cadence shared one
last hug. “Let me know when you get home.”

“We will, Auntie Celestia,” Cadence replied. “Take care.”

The two of them waved as they hopped aboard their ride, and they continued to
wave until the carriage disappeared into the city. Celestia then gave a deep
sigh, and she glanced up at her beloved.

“I always enjoy their visits.”

“Yeah. They’re pretty awesome.”

“Do I have any in-laws beyond your parents?” she asked as they walked back
inside.

“A couple. My mom has sister Sieva, who lives in Las Pegasus, but she never
married or had any foals. Her parents, Soy and Pole, are still alive and
kicking.  Dad has his mother, Flageolet, his brother Pinto and his sister
Cannellini, both of whom are married and have foals. Pinto has Jumping and Fava,
and Cannellini has Haricot, Lentil, and Mung.”

“We should visit them sometime.”

“Flageolet, Pinto and Cannellini will be easy enough; they live in Salt Lick.
Soy and Pole live in a retirement village in Las Pegasus, so I guess we would
have to have a family reunion if you want to meet them all at once.”

“That will probably be the way to go,” she agreed with a nod.

“Do they get any titles because of all this?”

“We should probably figure that out,” she chuckled. “Like your parents, however,
they will be mostly symbolic. They won’t have any actual authority.”

“Well, that’s probably for the best. You don’t want a bunch of my family
overrunning the place.”

She simply laughed with him at this, and then gave him a quick nip on his neck.

“Day court now?” he asked.

“Yes. But after that I think we should have a talk.”

“Talk?” he asked in concern.

“Nothing bad, but something you should know. It’s a bit like your arrest, in a
way. It won’t take very long to go over, so we could go over it just before
dinner if that is acceptable.”

“Sure. Do you think we’ll have many petitioners today?”

“I think it will be a bit slower today, but we will see.”


 * *  ✹ * * 


“So, what is this ‘thing’ you want to tell me?” Anon asked once they had settled
in next to each other in Celestia’s drawing room.

“It’s a somewhat serious thing, but nothing we can’t handle.” Celestia levitated
a book off of a shelf and placed it on the table before him. “Obviously, you
know that Luna was Nightmare Moon, and that she fell because of her jealousy.”

“Yes,” he replied with a bit of hesitation. Where was she going with this?

“There is a truth in that, one that you need to know. If Luna can fall, so can
I.”

Anon didn’t quite understand, and his face showed it. “So, you can turn into
Nightmare Moon too?”

“Not like that exactly,” she said as the pages of the book flipped open. “I have
my own version of it.”

The pages stopped on a pencil drawing of what, at first glance, looked like
Celestia. Anon then looked closer, and his eyes widened slowly. This Celestia
had the fangs and the dragon eyes of Nightmare Moon, but she wore armor that was
sun-themed instead of moon. She also appeared to have flames for her mane and
tail instead of her normal pastel colors.

She was terrifyingly beautiful, and it sent a chill up Anon’s spine.

“This is Daybreaker,” Celestia softly said. “If I were to ever tread the path
that Luna did, I would become this.”

“Wow,” he said with a note of fear.

“Thankfully, I have never given in to the darkness that would allow it to
consume me, nor do I plan to. By keeping my negative emotions in balance and in
check, this alternate me can never be.”

“But there is the possibility you could.”

“The only way Daybreaker can ever exist is if I allow any of my more negative
emotions to grow out of control. For Luna it was jealousy, but for me it would
be anger or arrogance.”

“Arrogance?”

“Feeling that I must solve all problems by myself. The darkness had never
possessed me, Anon, but it has come close a couple of times; and those times
were times when I felt like I alone was the one to solve the crisis at hoof. The
first time was when Luna and I fought against a dragon who had been destroying
villages on the borders of Equestria. I didn’t realize what it was then, so I
dismissed it as simply being enraged.

“The second time was during a war against the Sasquatch Barbarians. They were
overrunning our position, and if they had managed to break through my lines they
would have had a clear path to Canterlot. Thankfully, we were rescued that time
by the timely arrival of a griffon brigade, but just before they appeared I felt
it pushing, telling me it could defeat them all by itself. My desperation nearly
won out, and it terrified me.

“Now, I’ve felt it try to force its way out at other times as well, but never as
strongly as those two times. With Luna’s redemption and the problem-solving
prowess of Twilight and her friends, I hope that the risk will be so small that
it will never be a bother again. I didn’t want you to find out about this from
anypony else, so I realized this morning that I needed to tell you.”

He nodded, and took a moment to contemplate all of that before replying. “So, as
long as you feel like you don’t have to do everything on your own you won’t turn
into this thing?”

“Exactly. And now that I have you, the risk is negated even further.”

“Really?”

“Daybreaker thrives on hate, not love. Since you truly love me, it has no power.
Your love prevents this from ever happening.”

Anon nodded again and looked at the drawing. “You have seen this thing?”

“It occasionally pops up in my dreams, but never for very long. I use the love I
feel from my friends and family to be rid of it and its destructive lies.”

“Well, then I shall simply give you all the love I have then.” He turned to give
her a quick kiss.

“Thank you, my dear Anon. Now, let’s talk about some happier things, mm?”

“I’d like that.”

A soft tap came at the door, and Wysteria poked her head around with a tentative
expression much like she expected to have to make a quick and silent exit at the
sight of something she did not want to face right now.

“You didn’t lock it!” she quickly said.

“No, we didn’t,” Celestia said with a laugh. “What do you need?”

“Fleur De Lis and Fancy Pants are asking for a quick audience with you to sign
off on that donation.”

“Oh! Of course!” Celestia replied, and she quickly stood. “This’ll just take a
minute, Anon. I’ll be right back.”

“No problem,” he replied, and he smiled as she trotted out. His eyes then
drifted back to the drawing of Daybreaker, and he took a deep breath in. He was
glad she had told him about this, but it also scared him a little. To think that
she could be… that.

He then made the internal resolution to never do anything to bring this horror
out of his wife. Whatever it took, he would make sure she never had a reason to
go there.

He loved her too much to let anything happen to her. > 27. - Irritation >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Wait. You have to do that every night?” Anon looked on in fascinated horror
while his beloved downed the golden golf ball sized pill she had just created.

“Bleah,” Celestia replied while pulling a disgusted face. “Ugh. Yes, I do. The
anti-snoring effects only last for twelve hours. I think I might commission a
study to find a way to make it last longer.”

“How bad does it taste?”

“See for yourself,” she said while her magic conjured up another orb. “It won’t
do anything for you since you don’t snore.”

Anon ate the orb quickly, but then pulled the same contorted face of disgust. It
had a sort of bland taste, like a stamp, but laced with centipede droppings and
ear wax.

“Wow, you must really like me,” Anon said after downing the graciously offered
cup of water.

“Well, a little.” She smirked coyly. “And thankfully a glass of water clears out
the taste.”

“I’m glad it does. I’d rather put up with your snoring than have you be tortured
with that every night.”

“I would gladly swallow a dozen of those to be with you,” she replied with a
gentle kiss. “The goods that I receive far exceed the cost.”

“Heh,” Anon replied with a lopsided and very pleased grin. “Thanks.”

“Anytime, my dear Anon.”

Anon gave her a quick kiss, then another, then one last one before moving over
to the cushions and settling in for the night. Celestia trotted to the bathroom
while he did so, and Anon soon heard her toothbrush hard at work at removing
food particles and plaque. He then rubbed his tongue over his own teeth as he
tried to remember if he had brushed his own, and an embarrassed frown then
followed as he realized he might not have.

“Anon, love?” Celestia called out from where she was. “This might be a nit-picky
thing, but would you mind putting the cap back on the toothpaste when you’re
done with it? It irritates me a little when it’s left off.”

Oh, so he had brushed. “Yeah, of course! That’s not a problem at all.”

“Thank you,” she called back before coming in to the room and trotting over to
him. “I know it’s not a big deal, but it is a pet peeve of mine. Also, you might
want to consider switching to a soft-bristled brush. You still get the same
effect as the medium or the hard but without the damage to your gums.”

“Sure! Next time I get one I’ll make sure it’s soft bristles. I’d hate to go
long in the tooth prematurely.”

Celestia gave him a minty kiss before settling in next to him and draping her
right wing over him. He snuggled into her side a bit before glancing up and
giving her a worried look.

“This doesn’t hurt your wing, does it?

“No, it’s fine. If I held it taut it would hurt but I relax it when it is over
you.”

“Am I pushing into your side too much? I’m not making it hard to breathe, am I?
Or maybe you get too hot with me so close. I can scoot over a bit, and—”

Celestia moved in and stopped his ramblings with a long kiss. The tension in his
body released with the surge of joy and love that came, and she booped him
quickly when she pulled away.

“Relax my love. You’re getting worked up over nothing. If you are doing
something that makes me uncomfortable I will tell you.”

“Oh. Okay.”

“Why are you so worried all of a sudden? I appreciate your concern, but this is
the first time you’ve been this way about it.”

“Well, I just want to make sure you’re okay,” he replied softly. “I’m just a
little concerned you’re tolerating more than you need to just for me. You’re a
busy mare, and I don’t want you to lose sleep because of something I’m doing.”

“Ah.” Celestia nodded. “I appreciate that, but I really am quite comfortable
with you right there. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever slept better.”

“Really?” he asked in disbelief.

“Yes. So please don’t worry about that,” she replied, with a nip in his hair.
“In fact, I wouldn’t mind if you got a bit closer.”

“Oh, really?” he giggled, and he wiggled his back so he was pressed up closer to
her. “Better?”

“Much. We should get to sleep, though. We have much to accomplish tomorrow.”

“True. But I had a quick thought.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. Cadence said that you might like to do some guard training with me.”

Celestia gave him a wary smile. “I may. I suppose you would want me to teach you
some defensive maneuvers, much like how Sergeant Pokey was?”

“Yeah, like that, but just when you have the time,” he replied with a yawn.
“It’s not an urgent thing, but I don’t want to be a sack of potatoes if
something bad happens.”

“I believe I can work something out,” Celestia replied. “I may be a stern
taskmaster, though. I expected nothing less than perfection from my troops when
I actively led them, and I will expect the same from you.”

“I’ll take my chances. Besides, I bet you can’t be so stern when I... tickle
you!”

“GAH!” she laughed and rolled away from him, but he rolled with her and kept
tickling. “You little—ha! Stop! Ha, you green tormentor you! I shall
tolerate—HA!—no assault on my—stop!—my royal self!”

“You like this and you know it!” he replied back.


 * *  ✹ * * 


Celestia snorted herself awake the next morning, yawned, then smiled as she
moved to boop Anon awake.

She then frowned most furiously when she found no nose to boop.

“Where did he get to?” she muttered, and she checked under her left wing just to
be sure. The search turned up no Anon, and she grumbled a bit.

She missed him.

Duty called to the Princess, and Celestia trotted quickly outside to bring the
sun up for the day. Once done, she sprinted back inside and prepared to use a
searching spell to find him.

Before she could, Anon entered the room with a tray loaded with plates of food
and a small daisy in a vase. He was smiling, but it faltered when he found her
up and about. “Oh, feathers,” he pouted. “I was hoping to get back here before
you raised the sun.”

“What is that?” Celestia asked.

“Breakfast in bed,” he replied with his smile back in full force. “I thought it
would be nice, since you’ve been making me pancakes nearly every morning.”

“Oh!” Celestia matched Anon’s smile, and she teleported herself back to the
cushions. “Here, we’ll pretend like I just got up.”

“Ah, well! Good morning!” Anon laughed, and he walked over to her with the tray.
“I made you breakfast. I hope you like it.”

“What do you have?” she eagerly asked.

“Just a simple meal this time. Pancakes, of course, a couple of nice blueberry
bagels and cream cheese, some freshly-squeezed orange juice, and a bowl of mixed
fruit. Not much, but hopefully you’ll enjoy it.”

“I’m sure I will,” she replied while hungrily surveying the feast her husband
had prepared. “Ah, and I am most pleased to see you brought enough for two.”

“Yeah, I figured I should, given how you reacted when I didn’t join you, Cadence
and Shining for lunch the last time. Please! Dig in, let me know what you
think.”

She did so with the pancakes, but she thoughtfully chewed them as Anon popped a
few grapes in his mouth.

“Let’s see,” she remarked. “Flour, eggs, milk, butter. Very balanced, yes. But
no sugar?”

“It’s there. I hid it.”

“You hid it,” she flatly said, but then she took another happy bite. “You hid
it, or you used the proper amount and I’m still using too much.”

“No, no!” he instantly replied with a worried look. “The amount you use is
perfect! I probably didn’t put enough in mine.”

“Each way is fine,” she gently offered. “Yours have a more down-to-earth smell
and flavor to them. It’s just right for what you have here.”

“Okay,” he said with some worry. “I’ll double check the next time I make them,
and if I’m not putting in enough I will.”

“I’m sure you’re doing it right,” she offered.

The rest of the meal passed pleasantly, and they chatted about Celestia’s
upcoming class as they did so. Anon agreed to visit the class the next week, and
he suggested that he could even cook lunch for all of them as a demonstration
and as part of her lesson for that week.

“Or should I bake some bread?” he asked while Celestia finished the last of the
orange juice. “If you’re talking about microorganisms, yeast would be a good
visual example.”

“I think that is a good idea,” she said, and Anon looked extremely pleased.
“Let’s do that.”

“All right. I have a pretty good wheat recipe I can use. I’ll talk to Chef Beet
about getting the ingredients I need for it and some space in the kitchens.”

“Thank you again for the meal, my dear Anon.” Celestia replied with a kiss. “But
we need to get on with the day.”

“Right you are. Here, I’ll take that—” he gently took the tray of empty plates
away “—and I’ll meet you downstairs.”

“Why don’t you just let one of the staff take that? Then we can spend a few more
minutes together.”

“Oh. Right. That would work, I guess.”

Celestia gave him a curious, sidelong glance while he opened the main door and
called out to a nearby butler. He was acting strange this morning, and she was a
bit concerned about it. Yes, she had greatly enjoyed the breakfast and their
conversation during the meal, but it was almost like he was…

She frowned when the thought finished congealing in her head. He was doing all
of this to appease her, to placate her. He was brown-nosing, sucking up, trying
to buy her good graces.

No. Stop that, Celly. He’s trying to be a gentlestallion, she immediately
countered in her mind. Don’t be so harsh, and don’t be rude. He made you
breakfast because he wanted to do something nice for you. There’s no ulterior
motive here.

“Well, shall we?” Anon motioned to the door, and Celestia smiled and stood.

“I suppose we should. The paperwork won’t shuffle itself, after all.”

He offered a hand to her, and she took it with a smile. They then simply strode
out of the room, ready and eager to attack the day.


 * *  ✹ * * 


Anon glanced over the paragraph in the encyclopedia again, paused as he reread
the short statement, and then made some notes on a loose piece of paper. With
Celestia teaching and nothing for him to do, he had decided to take some time to
get a refresher history lesson in.

He had started with Star Struck. The head archivist had been extremely helpful
in helping him find the appropriate documents and records, and it had been a
fascinating two hours as he had played a game of hide-and-seek with the life and
times of Luna’s husband.

It really was as she had said, he found. He was mentioned quite a bit for the
first year to two years, and there were also quite a few notes about his
‘stubbornness’, but then something changed and it was almost like he dropped off
the planet. His policies and reforms were made vicariously through Luna, and
there were clear and deliberate attempts by him to keep his part unknown. There
was no reason given for the sudden shift, but Anon was pretty extra sure that
Luna had somehow changed his approach and viewpoint.

The last hour had been spent in reviewing the history of Equestria in general.
Since he was the prince of it, Anon figured it might just be more than a good
idea to know what his country had been up to over the last thousand years.

That was, of course, after he had come down from a small panic attack from the
fact that the Kingdom of Equestria was, by marriage and by law, his.

Thankfully, most of what he had reviewed sounded familiar, so he was hopeful
that he could be up to speed with the major points in history fairly quickly,
and then from there he could work on the so-called ‘lesser’ events with Celestia
as time allowed.

A soft smile broke out over his muzzle when he felt a faint pulse of air push
against his ear. He didn’t look up and then focused on the almost silent sound
of his wife’s approach. Another soft pulse moved across the other ear, but still
he refrained. Just a step or two more…

He quickly bent his head and neck backwards over the back of the chair, and he
gave Celestia a massive grin.

“Well, hello!” She laughed. “This is an interesting look for you.”

“What? Don’t like upside down?”

She gave him a quick kiss before replying. “No, I think I like you right side
up. That doesn’t look comfortable.”

“Yeah, not so much,” he offered while sitting upright again and turning to face
her. “How did your class go?”

“It was… interesting,” she replied with a sigh. “It just so happens that
Granite’s father is a microbiologist at the University, and so he was full of
information that he just had to share. I believe I spent half of the time trying
to explain what Granite was saying to everypony else.”

“I bet that was fun,” he chuckled. “And you look like you are ready for lunch.”

“I am. What should we have today?”

“Oh, I’m good with whatever you want to get.”

There it was again. Celestia was almost sure she had heard a tone of appeasement
in his voice, and the way he had tensed up indicated he was hesitant to share
his thoughts. He was holding back so she could get what she wanted.

She didn’t like that.

“How about a carrot dog and a basket of hayfries?” she said. Anon looked
confused for a moment, and she could see him wanting to ask about her choice,
but he quickly suppressed it and forced out a smile.

“That sounds really good. Would you like me to get the kitchen going on that?”

She gave him a slight glare. “I’ll come with you. We can eat together.”

“Oh, okay. Let me get all this put away and then we can go.”

She frowned deeply again while he cleaned up the books around him. She really,
really hoped that she was making something out of nothing, but the diplomat in
her was hardly ever wrong, especially when it came to people who were trying too
hard to make her happy.

Maybe he’ll stop after he eats, she thought, but if he keeps doing this he’s
going to get on my nerves in a hurry.


 * *  ✹ * * 


“That was an exceptional choice for lunch, my dear,” Anon brightly offered. “I
don’t even remember the last time I had a carrot dog that good, and Chef Beet
had just the right amount of salt on the hayfries.”

“I’m glad you approve,” Celestia replied with a thinly veiled grumble.

“Wysteria, don’t we have a meeting with the ambassador from Prance?”

“Yes, she should be arriving here in just a few minutes,” Wysteria replied.

“Well, best not to keep her waiting!” he replied with a healthy dose of
enthusiasm. “Shall we?”

“What was in that carrot dog?” Wysteria whispered to her employer as Anon
trotted briskly away.

“I don’t know, but he’d better stop or he’s going to get on my nerves,” Celestia
replied with a huff.

They both caught up to Anon in the throne room after taking a moment to review
some details for a later meeting with the Tradespony Guild, and he was pacing in
front of the doors and looking somewhat annoyed. He gave a quick smile to both
of them, but then quickly focused his attention back on the doors.

“She’s late,” Anon said.

“She is always late,” Wysteria replied. “The Prench never start anything on
time.”

“Well they should,” he muttered. “Celly has other things to get done today, we
can’t just lollygag around here!”

“Anon, relax,” Celestia said in a stern tone. “We accounted for for the late
start when we scheduled this. Everything will be fine.”

Anon stopped pacing immediately when he heard Celestia’s tone. “Oh. I’m just
worried you won’t get all of your work done.”

“Are you really?” she asked him with a deadpan expression.

“What?”

A guard by the main doors interrupted the conversation with a loud crack as his
spear struck the tile beneath him. “Announcing Ambassador Ligne Dure, from the
Republic of Prance!”

“Ambassador!” Anon didn’t even give her a chance to clear the threshold before
he was in her face and shaking her hoof. “Welcome! The Princess and I are
overjoyed to have you here.”

“I suppose the pleasure is mine?” Ambassador Dure asked with a healthy serving
of bewilderment. “You must be the new Prince, oui?”

“Yes, ma’am. Anonymous, and it’s my pleasure to make your acquaintance. Please!
Come! We have a lot to discuss, I’m sure.”

“Forgive me, but I was under the impression that this was a casual meeting. I
was unaware that there was an agenda.”

“There isn’t, Ambassador.” Celestia cut in, with a stern glare for her husband
that was impossible to miss. “Prince Anon is letting his enthusiasm get carried
away. Please, follow me. We have everything prepared right over here.”

Anon shrunk back and gave an embarrassed smile. That had not gone as well as
he’d hoped.

But there was still a chance for him to get back on the right path. A small
table had been set up in the throne room, with several soft cushions placed
around the perimeter for their enjoyment. Three glasses sat on the table, and
Anon noted with curiosity that a bowl of lemons, two large pitchers of water,
and a bowl of sugar were sitting on top.

Then he felt like a right proper twit. Lemonade! How blind could he be?
Obviously Celestia wanted him to make lemonade for everypony. He saw there was a
knife, a reamer, and a small bucket for the rinds once he took a better look,
and his spirits soared while everypony settled in on the cushions. Beverages
weren’t a strong point for him, but lemonade was easy.

Celestia began chatting with Ambassador Dure about her family while Anon went to
work. He focused on his methods and movements, took extra care to keep the
balance of lemon, water, and sugar appropriate and proportional, ensured that no
seeds or rinds snuck into the finished product in the glass, and then felt a
smug smile pull his lips upward as he finished stirring his concoction.

It would be the best glass of lemonade ever.

“Here you go, Ambassador.” Anon offered the glass with all the pleasant charm he
had. “I hope you like this.”

“Oh!” The Ambassador was… confused? “Thank you, Your Highness.”

Anon felt his own confusion growing. Ambassador Dure was giving Celestia a
questioning look that was laced with irritation, Celestia was flat out glaring
at him, and Wysteria was shaking her head with exasperation off in the distance.
What had he done this time?

“My prince, this is citron pressé.” Celestia stated, her tone forceful and
upset. “A pleasant summertime beverage that is enjoyed all across Prance. A pony
makes the drink themselves by adding the sugar, water, and lemon juice as they
see fit. It is extremely rude to the Prench to have somepony prepare it for
them, especially if that pony is somepony they have just met.”

Now Anon felt like a right proper twit.


 * *  ✹ * * 


“Look, I’m really sorry about that.” Anon offered as Celestia marched with him
down the hallway. “I thought it was—”

“Look, I’m really not interested in what you thought.” Celestia cut him off.
“That was highly embarrassing, Anon, and we’re lucky we have good relations with
the Prench. With the wrong diplomat that could have been a major international
incident.”

“I think you’re overstating things a bit,” Anon replied with his own irritation
growing. “I messed up, sure; but it was a glass of lemonade. I’m pretty extra
sure no one has gone to war over lemonade. Besides, the rest of the meeting went
well.”

“No, it didn’t,” Celestia snapped. “Ambassador Dure was very hostile, and I
didn’t get to bring up the Rosebud proposal. I’ll have to schedule another
meeting for that now. And yes, a glass of lemonade could start a war, Anon. If
that had been a Yak in there, I’d be begging for forgiveness, and I mean that
literally. Do you know how embarrassing it is to Equestria when their Princess
has to grovel? How that damages our reputation?”

“Well I’m sorry,” Anon huffed out angrily. “I’m sorry my help is taken in all
the wrong ways and that I’m so horribly offensive to the country.”

“Now you’re putting words in my mouth. I never said you were an embarrassment. I
said—”

“You did too!” Anon cut her off, and he snorted.

“Don’t interrupt me!” Celestia shot back. “I’m trying to explain to you what
happened.”

“No, you’re telling me you don’t appreciate my efforts to help.”

“I hate that you’re doing what you’re doing so you can pander to me!” she argued
back. “Ever since I brought up Daybreaker, you’ve been tiptoeing around me like
I’m going to explode at the slightest provocation. I don’t need yet another
yespony around, saying ‘of course, what a wonderful idea!’ I don’t need or want
anypony treating me like a porcelain figurine that will break into a million
pieces at the slightest touch of trouble! I can handle things on my own, I did
so for a thousand years!”

Anon snorted out a derisive laugh at the end of her speech. “Of course, Your
Highness. Forgive me for trying to be kind. I didn’t realize I had to be in
lock-step with your ideals, and it’s especially hard for me to do so when I
don’t know what your intents are. How could a poor, uneducated commoner like me
have any hope of meeting your impossible standards?”

There was a tense pause as the two stared each other down in fury. When Celestia
did break the silence, it was with a dangerously quiet tone.

“I’m not going to answer that. We both need to walk away before this gets out of
hoof.”

“Fine.”

They both offered a final hmph to each other before turning and walking away
from each other in the hallway.


 * *  ✹ * * 


Separating had prevented Anonymous and Celestia from boiling over in the hallway
after the botched meeting. After an hour or so apart, both were ready to talk to
each other again.

The only problem was that the separation had also given them both time to create
an extensive defensive trench system to hunker down in, and neither of them was
willing to come out into nopony’s land to negotiate a truce.

So the reunion was tense, to put it mildly. Both remained convinced that they
had done no wrong and that the other needed to apologize first, so their
conversations through dinner and into the evening were short, one to two
sentence affairs with copious amounts of silence in between.

But as sunset approached, Anon decided to step up and to apologize. He didn’t
think he needed to, nor had his mind changed; all he had done that day was be
his usual helpful self and she had no reason to be irritated. But he didn’t want
this to drag on all night, so when Celestia moved out on the balcony to lower
the sun he quickly followed her and rubbed against her side.

“Hey. I’m sorry about today. Things got a little out of hand.”

“Yes they did,” she replied. Her horn then flared, and Anon waited as the sun
bowed in reverence before the princess by sliding behind the hills. “But
thankfully this can all be remedied.”

“It can?”

“Of course.”

And then, for the next forty-five minutes, Celestia delivered a lecture so
thorough and watertight that Anon had no choice to submit to her superior
points. It was a shame that all of the court stenographers were unavailable, for
if one had been present and had recorded Celestia’s words, wives across
Equestria would have been able to browbeat even the most stubborn of partner
into submission. She went over his ‘helpfulness’ and how that had simply been an
excuse he had come up with to cover for his efforts to appease her, how he had
progressively irked her as the day had gone on, and how his desires to be
endlessly appeasing would be a liability if he persisted. She grilled him over
hot charcoal briquettes on how all of this had been wrong and how she really
didn’t need any more ponies fawning over her. She informed him,in grand phrases,
that she wanted him to be himself, to share his honest opinions and thoughts
without fearing her anger, because she really didn’t get angry very often. She
knew he had begun doing all of this in hopes of avoiding bringing Daybreaker to
life, but that if he persisted in his ways he might very well bring it out of
her anyway, so if he was serious about being helpful he needed to cease and
desist immediately.

Once she had finally finished driving her points home with a sledgehammer she
smiled and thanked him for being humble enough to admit he was wrong, and she
gave him a quick kiss to conclude and then happily trotted back into their
bedroom. Anon simply sat for a few minutes after this, trying to process what
had just been shoved down his throat and how everything had spiraled out of
control on him.

I didn’t do anything wrong. I was just being being kind. Why is she so upset
about all this?

“Anon, love? Come in please. It’s going to get cold soon.”

“Yes dear.”

He forgot about his irritation when he heard Celestia cough a few times. He
hurried back inside and found her drinking a tall glass of water, and he gave
her neck a quick pet as she drank.

“Are you all right?” he asked with genuine concern.

“Yes, I believe so. I just have a dry throat from talking so much.”

He remained unconvinced when she coughed again. “Are you sure?”

“I’m fine, really, but I am feeling a bit tired. Let’s head to bed, shall we?”

Anon nodded, and he snuggled in a bit closer when they settled down. He really
hoped she wasn’t just telling him she was okay to placate him. The cough didn’t
sound like a dry throat cough to him, and he was worried that she was coming
down with something instead. If she was, he wasn’t sure what he would do.

How do you treat a sick Alicorn, after all? > 28. - Sick Day >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anonymous couldn’t remember the last time he felt so hot.

He was used to heat of course, having worked with hot plates, ovens, torches,
and other such implements of baking through his whole life. The lick of the
flame and the searing kiss of fire had almost been like his first love, in a
way. But this sandstorm that swirled and surged around him now? This was
something else, something that could not care less if he was the the one cooking
or the one being cooked. It was unrelenting, unfeeling, and felt no need to give
him quarter or mercy.

That’s what the difference was, really. He wasn’t the one in control of this
heat. This was not the tender touch that he could command and control and rebuke
when it grew beyond what it should. It was past him, answering to another who
had earned the crown of victory over it. It followed the siren song of the one
who had conquered it millennia ago.

This would answer to none but the Princess who moved among mortals as the one
known as Celestia.

The ground beneath him began to rumble, and he paused and glanced at the cracks
that were forming in the parched earth. It wasn’t a full-out earthquake, he
somehow knew, but rather more like somepony had taken the edges of the world and
was giving everything a firm shake. He wanted to press forward, but with this
movement he wasn’t sure he could maintain his balance.

He couldn’t just stand there, though. He tried to take few steps forward, but
the shaking was just strong enough to knock off his balance and send him
tumbling to the ground.


~*~


Anon groaned as the impact of the dream trip sent him back into reality. He then
grunted at the odd nature of his subconscious, yawned, and then blinked a few
times to clear the sleepiness from his eyes.

He then discovered why he had been dreaming of an earthquake and heat. Celestia
was shivering fiercely, her whole body twitching uncontrollably as her teeth
chattered, but yet she felt hot to the touch.

He glanced at the fireplace quickly. The flames had died out and had left barely
glowing embers in their place, so it wasn’t because of that. He stuck a leg out
from under her wing, and the room air felt normal enough as far as he could
tell.

His concern started to grow, but he forced himself to remain calm. She was sick,
that was as plain as the horn on her head, but he was sure a doctor could be
summoned in short order if he could just alert a guard or some other staffer.

Anon slowly began to extricate himself from under her wing, but she seemed to
notice this and she moaned a bit as he did so. It tore at his heart to hear it,
but she needed help so he switched tactics and slid out as quickly as he could.
Once he was out, he walked briskly to the door and flung it open.

“Sir!” The two guards at the door replied simultaneously, and they came to full
alert. “What is it?”

“Any chance one of you could go fetch a doctor?”


 * *  ✹ * * 


Anon paced outside his bedroom door as he waited for Doctor Horsenpfeffer to
finish her evaluation. Luna had appeared shortly upon hearing the clattering and
banging of the guard while they had been summoning the doctor, and while she
looked concerned she still maintained a calm and orderly demeanor.

“Anon, relax.” Luna offered in an effort to calm him down. “She probably just
has the feather flu or something. If it was serious there would be a great many
more medical ponies up here.”

“I know, I know. But I didn’t really think alicorns could get sick.”

“We do, though perhaps not as often as other ponies do.”

Then the door opened, and both Royals turned eager eyes to the periwinkle
medical professional. She gave a short sigh but then offered a tired smile for
them while she placed her stethoscope back into her black medicine bag. “Well,
the good news is that Princess Celestia seems to have caught the feather flu.”

“Told you,” Luna quickly pointed out.

“The bad news is the same: Princess Celestia has the feather flu.”

“Huh?” Anon replied. He couldn’t handle riddles under the best of circumstances.

“The Princess needs rest right now more than anything, Your Highness. If she can
do that she should be over this in a day or two, tops. The problem is that the
Princess hasn’t taken a sick day in two hundred and fifty years. She still
presses on, and thus her illness not only lasts longer but spreads. Feather flu
is highly contagious, so if she keeps going like she always does she could start
a pandemic.”

“Why am I not sick then?”

“Feather flu only affects those creatures with wings. Princess Luna would be at
risk if she entered the room, but you have nothing to worry about.”

“Oh. That’s a bit weird.”

“A little.” The good doctor chuckled. “At any rate, the best thing right now is
to make sure she rests. If you could keep her in bed somehow that would greatly
help.”

“I can try, I suppose.” Anon shrugged. “I don’t think I could stop her if she
really wants to get up though.”

“You may have more sway than you think, Anon,” Luna said with a chuckle. “If you
tell her to rest, I am willing to bet she will rest.”

“The more sleep she gets, the faster she’ll get over this,” Doctor Horsenpfeffer
added. “Just do your best, keep an eye on her temperature, and keep any and all
pegasi away from her.”

“All right. I’ll do what I can.”

“Thank you. Try to have her drink lots of orange juice too. A little extra
vitamin C never hurts.”

Anon simply nodded in reply, and Luna thanked the doctor for making the late
night visit.

“Well, I suppose I should return to my duties.” Luna sighed as Horsenpfeffer
walked away. “Let me give you something first.”

“Lavender?” Anon asked after Luna had conjured up a large bouquet and presented
it to him.

“A very effective sleeping aid.”

“Oh. I’ll put them near Celly then.”

Luna nodded with a smile. “I will also monitor both of your dreams closely,
unless something pulls me away. I doubt Celly will be dreaming much, but an
untroubled mind would be beneficial to her as well.”

“Thank you.”

“Good night, Anon.”

Anon watched Luna walk away before returning to the interior of the room. A few
candles remained lit, and two delightful pools of magenta focused on him as he
returned to his beloved’s side.

“Lavender?”

“Luna says it will help you sleep,” Anon said over a sneeze from his beloved

“Let’s place them just over there. Also, could I trouble you to bring me a
blanket? I still feel cold.”

“Sure. Which one?”

“There is one in the closet, a nice blue quilt on the shelf by my dresses. If
you don’t mind, that is.”

“Of course not. I’ll be right back.”

Anon knew right where to look, but the weight of the quilt did catch him off
guard. He stumbled back a step and grunted as he adjusted, and he heard feathers
rustling in the other room.

“I got it!” he called out. “I’m fine!”

“Are you sure?”

“Oh yeah,” he said with only a little strain. “This is a thick quilt.”

“Luna gave it to me as a Hearth’s Warming present when she first returned. I
usually wait to pull it out until winter, but I just cannot get warm tonight.”

“This thing is huge!” Anon remarked while he tried to unfold it. “You might have
to send a search party in after me.”

Celestia gave a slight laugh before being consumed with a round of coughs. “Luna
also remembered me being larger and taller than I actually am.”

“It looks warm though,” he replied as he pulled the blue mass of comfort over
her. “And cozy. She did good.”

Celestia gave a tired smile, lifted her wing for Anon, then sighed as he settled
in next to her.

“Anything else you need?” he asked.

“No. I should be all right now,” she said with a cough. “I hate getting sick.”

“Well, I’ll take care of you, don’t worry,” he replied with a quick nuzzle.

“I appreciate that,” she said through a yawn. “Hmm. You know, this reminds me of
my mother in a way.”

“Really?”

“Mm, yes,” she replied as she closed her eyes and relaxed her head. “I can
remember one time, when I was five or six perhaps, when I got sick with a cold.
She bundled me up in a soft, warm blanket, and she sat me up on her lap and read
all the books I would ask for. She made some kind of soup that filled me with
delight from my horn to my tail, and then she simply sat and sang soft lullabies
to me until I fell asleep.”

“That sounds amazingly wonderful. You had a good mom.”

“I did,” she said with a soft smile. “And now I have you to snuggle with.”

“Provided you want to keep me.”

Her wing tightened a bit around him, and her breathing slowed as she drifted
into Luna’s domain.

“I never want to lose you.”

Anon felt a tear tickle his cheek as she began to snore softly. He had wondered
earlier if their fight had made her regret her decision to stay with him, but it
appeared it had not. He realized that he would probably still feel slighted if
Celestia wasn’t sick, but he could put that aside and deal with it later. For
now he needed to focus on helping her.

His own injuries could wait.

He smiled a bit and booped her, then began humming quietly as he too started to
join her in the realm of dreams. Whether his little tune was being recalled from
a distant memory or if he was catching nonsense notes from the midnight air was
unknown, but in the end it didn’t matter. The tune was pleasant enough to bring
out a small smile from Celestia’s lips, and Anon felt his own smile growing as
he partook of the sight before him. He was amazed all over again that this mare
had chosen to remain with him, but instead of feeling overwhelmed Anon found he
felt content and pleased. He was fine with feeling amazed, but he realized he
was grateful too.

Perhaps that little feeling of gratitude could make all the difference in the
end.


 * *  ✹ * * 


“Good morning, my dear.” Anon laughed a little as he received a round of coughs
and a sneeze in reply.

“Meh,” Celestia verbalized how she felt afterward. “Is it time to raise the
sun?”

“I think so, but Luna just checked in on us from the balcony so I think she’s
raising it today.”

“She is?” Celestia asked, and she groaned when Anon nodded. “Ugh. She better not
complain about it then.”

“About what? The hives?”

“No so much that. She—”

“HOT! HOT! HOT!”

“That—” Celestia said with a long-suffering sigh “—is what I meant.”

Anon looked on in amused horror as Luna, from within a magical shield, pranced
into the room and blew out the small flame that had been burning on one of her
wingtips. There was smoke rising from her back and from a few patches of singed
hair on her sides, and it appeared that a few of her feathers had been turned to
charcoal.

“You are hereby prohibited from ever getting sick again.” Luna announced, as she
checked her other wing for any open flames. “And are you completely sure there
is no way to turn down the temperature on that thing?”

“Still no,” Celestia replied.

“Lousy hot ball of air,” Luna grumbled.

“Hydrogen, actually.”

“Unless something changed in the last thousand years, I do believe hydrogen is
still a component of air.”

“Told you she gets grouchy,” Celestia remarked to Anon with a weak smile. “Thank
you for raising it, Sister.”

“Yeah, well, you owe me for that,” she replied as she turned her focus to
Celestia. “I will think of something horribly embarrassing for payment, don’t
worry.”

“I’m sure you will.”

“So, are you feeling any better from last night?”

“Slightly. I’m not cold anymore but I still feel very congested, achy, and
tired.”

“But at least your condition is improved. I have informed Chef Beet to prepare
oatmeal for you and to have it brought it up here. There should also be more
orange juice for you as well.”

“Orange juice sounds good,” Celestia sighed with a quick nuzzle for Anon.

“Rest, dear Sister, and I will check on you again later.”

Celestia nodded, and Luna teleported away without further comment.

“All right. Now that she’s gone I can get some work done before day court. I
just need my—”

“No, you don’t.”

Celestia slowly turned to face her husband. “No?”

“No,” he repeated. “You need rest, and the doctor told me last night you’re
really contagious. You can’t do any work today.”

Anon wasn’t sure if she was impressed or irritated. He really hoped it was the
former so he wouldn’t have to get into another fight with her already.

“Are you telling me no?” she asked. “Me? Your princess, your ruler, your bringer
of the day?”

“I am telling my wife no. The fact that you are a princess and that you bring
the day is irrelevant. You need to rest.”

She gave him a curious look for a moment, but then moved in and gave him a quick
boop. “If you insist, then. But I really do hate to cancel everything today,
especially day court. It would be horrible to find out a pony had made a long
and arduous journey so they could offer their petition to the throne, only to
find there is no opportunity for them to do so, leaving them with nothing.”

“Couldn’t Luna take over?”

“She could, but she never has shown any interest in doing so since her return. I
almost believe she is afraid to handle the affairs of Equestria alone.”

Anon’s eyes darted back and forth as he thought through an idea that had just
come to him. “What if… what if I helped her?”

“You?” Celestia asked with a cough. “You want to run day court with Luna?”

“Yeah. So long as she helps me out, I bet I could handle it.”

“I don’t know. I believe you could handle everything in time, but you haven’t
had a lot of education or training yet. But if Luna was there, and if Wysteria
helped out too…”

“Whatever it takes to keep you in bed.”

“Or I could just keep myself under a shield. That way nopony can get infected.”

“That is not resting twice,” Anon replied sternly.

“Oo, you’re so cute when you’re angry.” Celestia chuckled.

“I am not,” he retorted sourly. “I am very serious when I am angry, and I should
be taken seriously.”

“But while being cute,” she replied with a soft laugh. “All right. If Luna is
willing to keep an eye on things and if Wysteria will take notes for me to
review, I think that will work.”

“You have to stay in bed though,” he said with what he hoped was an even sterner
look, “and no work. No papers, no meetings, no nothing. You are allowed to snack
and to drink orange juice and water and to sleep.”

“And now you are giving me orders,” she chuckled again. “All right. I promise I
will not do anything work related.”

“And if something comes up that I can’t handle, I’ll come consult with you,”
Anon offered.

“Sounds good. May I read a book while I rest?”

“Yes,” he said with a smile.

“Good. I have two or three that I’ve been meaning to get to in the last three
hundred years.”

“That’s a long time to put off a book.”

She gave him a coy smile and a mischievous wink before a knock came at the door.

“Good morning, Your Highnesses!” Wysteria offered as she pushed in a trolley
with a domed tray. “I’m sorry to hear you’re not feeling well, but Chef Beet
made some delicious oatmeal for you.”

“Makes me wish I could smell,” Celestia muttered.





“I apologize in advance for this,” Anon said to Wysteria as they walked down the
hall.

“Hey, I’m more than happy to help you out if it means the Princess will actually
stay in bed,” she replied. “The last time she was sick she ended up giving half
the staff in the palace—including me—the pony pox. She really just doesn’t know
how to not work.”

“Well, she’s only just recently had the option to take a sick day. I think she
needs to learn how to delegate a little bit better.”

“She is doing better about that since I first got hired, but you are right. I
get the feeling she just wants to make sure because she cares.”

“I can believe that,” he said  with a laugh. “This will be good for all of us in
one way or another I bet.”

“I certainly hope so.”


 * *  ✹ * * 


Anon and Wysteria entered the throne room through the staff entrance and chatted
about the upcoming session of Day Court. Wysteria remarked that the day would
probably be slower due to it being a weekday, which helped Anon’s nerves
slightly, but he did admit to being a tad bit worried.

“You’ll do fine.” Wysteria patted his shoulder in reassurance.  “If it is a
tricky decision, I can pull some strings and have whoever it is remain in
Canterlot until Celestia can render judgement. However, I think between you, me,
and Luna, we’ll be able to handle most of the petitioners.”

“Where is Luna, anyway?” Anon asked as he looked around quickly for her.

“She said she’ll be right down. She had to take care of some hives first.”

“Oh, okay then. I thought she was just kidding about that.”

“No, she really breaks out. But only a little bit.”

“Huh.”

“She’ll be fine, don’t worry. Go ahead and have a seat while I finish up a few
details. Luna should be down by the time we start.”

Anon simply nodded before moving to sit as instructed. Up to this point, he had
been maintaining pretty well, but he hadn’t anticipated being on the throne by
himself.

And now he was. Not as some kind of stunt or reward, not for a photo
opportunity. This was his throne, before his ponies in his country.

The full weight of what that really meant began to settle in on him. In the
previous day courts with his beloved, he had felt like a spectator, or perhaps
like a reporter being given an inside look at how Celestia went about her day
for an upcoming article. All he had to do then was sit back and watch Celestia
move Equestria along.

But it was becoming clear that this would not be how things would remain. Since
he fully believed Celestia when she had told Minister Wise and the two bickering
pegasi that he was her equal, that meant that he would be issuing edicts. His
word would become law for millions across a vast and prosperous land, and he
would be responsible for the results of his actions.

Anon took a deep breath in. He had agreed to this. Celestia had warned him, she
had given him a way out. Even now it was still a valid option. He could ask for
the divorce, walk away from this tremendous responsibility.

But how deeply would that cut? He shuddered as he thought about how devastated
he would be if she was the one to ask him. He couldn’t, not now. He was too
emotionally invested.

There wasn’t a thing in the whole of Equestria that could convince him
otherwise.

But that led him back to the original thought, and he closed his eyes while he
inhaled and exhaled slowly and deeply.

“I can do this. I can.”

“Yes, this should be quite droll.”

“Gah!” Anon jumped sideways, but still managed to remain in the seat.
“Discord?!”

“Hey-o Anon-o. Miss me?” The Mismatched Master of Mayhem asked with a delighted
grin.

“Uhm…” Anon wasn’t quite sure how to answer that. He really had not missed him,
but he didn’t want to offend the Lord of Chaos.

“Don’t worry, I know you did.” He ran a paw over the cushion beneath him. “Ooh!
Very nice! No wonder she sends Twilight and her friends off to do her dirty
work. If this was my throne I’d never get off my duff either.”

“Look, I really don’t need…” Anon started, but then he stopped himself. If he
was going to be Celestia’s prince, he needed to act the part. “Discord, unless
you are here to make a petition, I will need to respectfully ask you to leave.”

“Relax, mon capitaine, I’m not here to cause any trouble.”

“You’re not?” he blurted before he could help himself.

“Nope! I’m sure you’ll cause enough of that without my help. I’m just here to
watch the fun.”

Well, that was inspiring. Discord smiled and wrapped an arm around Anon in a
friendly embrace, much like a boa constrictor.

“Do me proud, Anon-o.”

He snapped his talon, and in a flash of light he moved from Anon’s side and into
one of the stadium seats that had just appeared out of nowhere. The seats ran
the length of the throne room and back up the other side, and more Discords
began to file in from large archways that were at either end of the seats. The
real Discord was sitting on the front row and perhaps ten feet away from Anon,
and he was now sporting an oversized foam finger on his paw with ANON IS #1
emblazoned upon it, a large tub of popcorn, and a ballcap with two soda cans
tied to it. He waved at Anon gleefully, let out a shrill whistle, then shoveled
in a large talonful of popcorn as a few fellow Discords sat next to him.

“Are you okay, Your Highness?” Wysteria asked as she walked around the throne
and glanced at the bedlam. “I can have the guards clear him out if you want.”

“Do you really think they could?” he wondered aloud. As capable as the Royal
Guard may be, he was genuinely curious as to how they would go about doing that.

“No, not really.” Wysteria admitted. She gave a glaring glance to the
draconequus as he playfully waved back at her. “But I will personally award the
Hoofbel prize to the pony who can,” she snarled a bit under her breath.

“I guess he’s fine, so long as he behaves himself,” Anon said while he took his
turn glaring at two Discords who seemed to be fighting over a bowl of nachos.
They both laughed nervously and smiled sheepishly, and another bowl of nachos
appeared to end the feud. “How much longer do we have before day court starts?”

“Well, it really should be starting now,” Wysteria admitted. “But I’m not sure
why Luna isn’t here yet.”

“Who’s the first petitioner?”

“Let’s see…” She glanced down at her trusty clipboard. “Oh! That’s interesting.
It’s a unicorn by the name of Starlight Glimmer. She wants to start a new town
out near Manehattan.”

“Why is that interesting?”

“I don’t recall anypony else asking to start a town the whole time I’ve worked
here. It’s interesting that she wants to start a new one rather than move to a
place that’s already established.”

Anon thought about this for a moment. While interesting and perhaps a bit odd,
there didn’t seem to be a reason why this Starlight should be denied. “Send her
in, Wysteria. Maybe we can figure out why she wants to do this while we wait.”

“Of course, Your Highness.” Wysteria nodded to the guards at the door. The
massive double doors then swung open, and Anon took a deep breath again as his
hand touched his Celestial Crystal.

This was now his court.

He then noticed that Discord and his fellow… well, Discords, since he couldn’t
think of a better name for the duplicates, had suddenly become deathly silent.
The light in the throne room dimmed, and Anon groaned as he noticed every single
Discord in the room was now dressed in long, hooded black robes that obscured
their eyes but left the cheerfully malevolent smile visible.

A distant bell began to knell as all of the Discords followed Starlight
Glimmer’s approach, but interestingly enough she seemed to be unperturbed, and
even seemed to revel in the attention in a way.

“Here ye, there she!” A Discord shouted from beside Anon. He unfurled a long
scroll and cleared his throat before proceeding. “The Court will now hear the
petition of one Starlight Glimmer, who is accused of equality! How plead you
before this Tribunal?”

“Tribunal?” Anon asked. “What tribunal?”

“Well, since you’re flying solo at the moment I thought I would help,” Discord
replied as an aside but with a huge grin. “C’mon, Anon-o! You’ll still make the
final call, I promise.”

“This is your idea of… never mind.” Anon began rubbing his temples. “All right,
fine. But please try to have some decorum, all right?”

“Decorum, gotcha,” Discord replied with a wink from under his his hood. “That’s
some kind of grubworm, right?”

“Of course he thinks it’s a worm.” Anon groaned again. He had the feeling he’d
be doing that a lot today. “Back to the topic at hand. Miss Glimmer, you want to
start a new village, correct?”

“Yes, Your Highness.”

“Where, exactly, are you proposing to found this new settlement at?”

“I’m so glad you asked, Your Highness!” she replied with an overabundance of
enthusiasm. Several large maps floated out of her saddlebags and she proudly
held them aloft in her magic. “I would like to build Our Town here, just to the
northwest of Manehattan.”

Anon then stood and took a few steps closer to the maps with Wysteria and
Discord.

“‘Just to the northwest?’” Wysteria asked in confusion. “Miss Glimmer, you are
aware that the location you’re proposing is many miles outside of the regular
trade routes and guard patrols, right? You will be, for all intents and
purposes, on your own. Isolated.”

“I certainly hope so, ma’am. That is the whole point.”

“It is?” Anon asked, as he glanced at Wysteria briefly. “Why?”

“For a fresh start, your Highness. I want to create a place with no distractions
from outside, where we can be self reliant. A blank slate, if you will. This
will be my chance to make the perfect place to live.”

There was something that didn’t sit right with the way she said that, but was
there some sort of legal precedent to stop her from pursuing this?

“Prince Anon?”

“Yes, Miss Starlight?

“Do you have a cutie mark, if I may ask?.”

“Well, no. As far as I know only ponies get cutie marks and as you can probably
see, I'm not a pony." He said. 

“Really? That must be frustrating, if I may say, your destiny must be quite
vague.”

“Well, I’m not really bound to any destiny, I think.”

“Oh?  It is something you’re going to have to live with for the rest of your
life. That sounds pretty bound to me.”

“I suppose,” he replied. Now she really was creeping him out, and that smile
wasn’t helping. “But in a way it’s rather open to interpretation. It brought me
here in a roundabout way after all. I'm for all intends and purposes a blank
page. And much like how blank pages provide the opportunity to create a new
world out of words, I too have this new opportunity to make a difference in
ponies lives, much like your request to start a new life in a new place. And
though I may not fully understand it that doesn’t make it bad.”

“Perhaps.” She seemed placated but her gaze rested uncomfortably on his butt,
where his cutie mark would be.

“May I have this map for a second?” he asked as he pointed to one, and Starlight
gladly levitated it into his hands. “Thank you. Allow me to consult with my
advisors for a minute.”

“Of course, Your Highness.”

Anon gave her a wary look before moving back and behind the throne with Wysteria
and Discord. The savvy secretary then caught the meaning of his glance and put
up a soundproof shield before they continued.

“Well? What do you think?”

“I think I feel my skin crawling every time she speaks, that’s what I think,”
Wysteria replied.

“Yes, I’m getting that vibe too, but what about her petition?”

“Well, she does has everything in order: the application, building permits, fees
and dues. I really don’t see why she couldn’t be allowed to go start this little
commune of hers.”

“Yeah, but that’s just it. She wants to be isolated, intentionally. What kind of
a pony wants that?”

“There are a few ponies that prefer solitude, Your Highness. The paperwork shows
a small hamlet of about twenty ponies or so. Maybe they’re just all tree huggers
and want to live in that minimalist fad that’s been going around.”

“Hm.” Anon tapped his chin thoughtfully. “Could be. A lot of ponies thought the
Apple family had gone nuts when they settled down near the Everfree.  Discord,
what are your thoughts?”

Discord held up a talon and a squeak emerged from his throat, but then he
stopped with a puzzled look. “Wait. You want to know what I think?”

“Yeah. You run Discordland, right?”

“Discordland?” he questioned. “Oh! That city I made up in… dah…” he stammered
for a moment as he realized what had escaped out of his mouth, “I mean, hah! Of
course! I am an expert on new settlements, how kind of you to ask for my
expertise!”

“Relax, Discord,” Anon replied with a hearty chuckle. “I was pretty extra sure
you were making it up all along. But really, what do you think?”

“I… well, noone has ever really asked me what I think, except for Fluttershy.
You really want to know?”

“I wouldn’t ask if I wasn’t serious,” Anon replied with a grin.

Discord teared up for a moment, placed a furry fist next to his quivering lower
lip, and smiled like he’d never smiled before. He then reached out, grabbed
Anonymous, and gave him a gigantic hug.

“You’re all right, Anon-o,” he offered in all sincerity. He then snapped his
talon, and Anon found himself back on the ground and looking at Discord in a
dark brown trenchcoat and fedora.

“All right, here’s the scoop. But keep a lid on it, see?” He said in a harsh
whisper while glancing around to make sure they weren’t being watched. “Anon-o,
I don’t like it, not one bit. She’s up to something.”

“Why do you say that?” Wysteria asked.

“Exhibit A: the application,” Discord replied as he pulled it out of his coat
and held it out in his talon. “She filled it out in triplicate. Triplicate!”

“What?” Anon had to ask. “Why does that even—”

“No, he’s got a point.” Wysteria cut in.

“Care to explain?” Anon asked with a little exasperation.

“All forms need to be filled out in triplicate to get processed properly, but
she is the first pony to actually have all three ready at the time of her
application. Nopony has ever had all their paperwork ready to go right off. And
look,” Wysteria began flipping through the papers on her clipboard with her
hooves. “Environmental study, done. Impact usage analysis, done. Stormwater
mitigation plan, done. Every last thing you need to do any kind of construction
is done. Nopony is that well organized, not even me. For her to have all this
ready means she’s been planning this for… years, probably. That’s really eerie.”

“All right. So she’s exceptionally organized,” Anon summarized.

“Twilight Sparkle is that organized,” Discord added. “This is the sign of a
seriously disturbed mind, and I should know. Which brings us to Exhibit Two:
that smile.”

“Smile?” Anon repeated.

“Exactly. I don’t like it, I don’t like it one bit. I know smiles, and that
smile? That’s just not right.”

Anon caught on to what Discord was saying this time with no trouble. Starlight
Glimmer’s smile hadn’t waned, hadn’t faltered in the slightest during her whole
time there. It was perpetual, and that really made it seem forced.

“Ok, so creepy unending smile.”

“Exhibit Next? That cutie mark!” Discord leveled the statement as if that was
the most condemning thing about all of this. He leaned down and threw a furry
paw over Anon before he continued. “Who has a mathematical symbol on their
flank, I mean really?”

“Let’s see.” Wysteria’s eyes drifted upward as she thought. “Professor Cosine at
the University has a math based cutie mark, and Deputy Plum Level has a math
equation in hers, my third-grade teacher, Missus Millimeter, had two plus two
equals four for her cutie mark, The Mayor of—”

“Fine, finefinefine.” Discord interrupted with an annoyed huff. “Strike Exhibit
Next. But I’m telling you, Anon-o, I trust her about as far as she frowns.”

“Okay, but does any of that prevent her from going forward with this?”

“Well, no.” Discord was finally forced to admit. “I don’t suppose it does.”

“All right. Thank you, Discord,” Anon replied with a deep sigh.

“I can put her application aside until one of the princesses can take a look at
it,” Wysteria offered.

Anon fiddled with his Crystal as he thought. What would Celestia do in this
circumstance? How would she rule? Should he just pass it on?

No, he wanted to figure this out. He wanted to show he could be useful. “All
right. I think I know what to do,” he finally announced. “Discord, can I ask you
for a favor?”

Discord leaned back slightly and gave Anon a leery look. “Favor?”

“Yeah. Could you keep an eye on Starlight for me? Just check in on her randomly
and see if she’s up to something.”

“What’s in it for me?”

“A Royal sanction to spy on a pony?” Wysteria dryly offered.

“Nah, I do that already. How about your first-born, Anon-o?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Second born?”

“You’re not getting any of my borns.”

“Well you’re no fun,” he replied with a huff. “How about one hour of your life
every umpth Tuesday?”

“That… really doesn’t sound any better.”

“Oh, come now mon capitaine!” Discord replied. “That’s my tea day with
Fluttershy. She keeps telling me to bring a friend, and now I can bring you!”

“I guess…” Anon stalled out in thought for a minute. “Celly could come too,
right?”

Discord scoffed. “Please. We’re talking about Fluttershy here. You could invite
Queen Chrysalis along and she’d still be fine with it.”

“I doubt that,” Anon replied. “But that doesn’t sound too bad, I suppose. I
agree, with the understanding that I might need to cancel if something important
comes up here.”

Discord gave a squeak of joy. “Done! I’ll watch her like Maud watches Boulder.”

“I… I have no idea who that is, but thank you all the same,” Anon offered.

Discord again grew misty-eyed and Wysteria nodded with a smile before the shield
dropped and all three returned to their spots.

“I see no reason why you can’t go forward with your plan, Miss Starlight,” Anon
announced. “The Crown will accept your petition and application, on the
condition that you allow a contingent of inspectors and specialists to insure
things are up to code and specifications during construction.”

It may have been his imagination, but her smile seemed to twitch slightly. “Oh,
your Highness,” Starlight scoffed and waved a dismissive hoof. “That will not
be—”

“I am going to insist on that.” Anon ordered forcefully. “To build a town in the
middle of nowhere is quite strange, Miss Glimmer. I believe it would be in the
best interest of the Crown to make sure you are not attempting to cover
something illegal, yes?”

“Of course, Your Highness. Your inspectors will have free access to all the
pertinent information they need.”

“Good. Did you have anything else to bring before the Court?”

“No, Your Highness. I have received everything I need.”

Anon nodded, and Starlight’s smile still held fast as she followed a pegasus
guard out of the hall.

“Impressive, young Anonmeister.” Discord offered from under his hood. He
steepled his fingers and smiled wickedly before continuing. “Most impressive.
Soon your journey on the path of Royalty will be complete!”

“What are you talking about?” Anon asked.

“I dunno.” Discord shrugged.

All light in the room suddenly shut off with a loud clank, and an upbeat song
from a pipe organ began playing from nowhere as spotlights danced across the
hall. Anon looked over at Discord and he tried to ask what he was doing, but
instead he found himself once again in Discord’s furry and excited embrace as he
pointed to the staff entrance.

“Royalty and Draconequus!” Discord’s voice boomed out of the ceiling. “Coming on
the court now for the home team, in the number two spot, batting .302 over the
last three seasons and back in the game after a long stay in the penalty box,
everypony’s favorite tortured ruler, Princess LLUUUUNNNAAA!”

The crowd of Discords erupted into cheers and applause as a spotlight followed
Luna’s quite thoroughly confused entrance. The light slowly increased as she did
so, and by the time she reached Anon and Discord they had returned to normal.

“I would ask what is going on but I fear the answer would be more confusing than
the question,” Luna remarked, as she took in the still-cheering crowd.

“Discord wanted to help out today,” Anon said, and Discord nodded his head with
enough force to make a rattling noise. “He actually was really helpful with the
first petitioner.”

One eyebrow peaked as Luna gave Anon a sly smile. “Oh? You started without me?”


 * *  ✹ * * 


“Thank you, Princess!”

“Not at all. Good day, fair subject!”

Luna chuckled as she waved to the departing petitioner before offering a
satisfied sigh. “A most charming stallion,” she remarked to Anon. “My sister
should have told me day court was this easy. I would have offered her a day off
many moons ago.”

“I don’t think this is normal,” Anon replied. “Five petitioners in two hours?”

“It is unusually dead, Your Highness,” Wysteria added. “Usually we have this
many petitions in the first fifteen minutes.”

“But if these petitions are indicative of what she usually contends with then
she has greatly exaggerated her workload. Perhaps I will run day court on my own
sometime.”

“I’m sure Celestia would appreciate the day off, Your Highness,” Wysteria said
with a slight roll of her eyes.

“But since we speak of Celly, I understand you had a disagreement with her
yesterday,” she flatly remarked to Anon.

“A small argument. Nothing to worry about.”

“Hmm. Was the argument her fault or yours?”

“Well, it was hers. She accused me of pandering to her when I was just trying to
be nice.”

“And the incident with the citron pressé?”

“Heh, you heard about that?” he asked as he rubbed the back of his head in
embarrassment. “Yeah. Not my best moment, but she never told me what was going
on. I just assumed it was for lemonade.”

“I see. May I offer a small piece of advice?”

“Sure.”

“From what I have heard of the incident, I believe my sister was more in the
wrong than you were, especially with the lemonade. It was not fair of her to
assume that you knew about Prench customs since you are an upscale cook and can
make Prench meals.”

“But that’s just it: I can’t. My family specializes in Caballian and Equestrian
dishes. My mom always said the Prench were too snobby.”

“But does Celly know that?”

“Uh…” he stalled out in thought. “I guess not.”

Luna nodded. “Exactly. In her mind, you are fluent in foreign customs because of
your background. She had no way of knowing that you did not know.”

“So that was my fault?”

“In a way. If you ever find yourself making an assumption, Anon, ask somepony
about it and make sure you are right first. You will avoid a lot of headaches
and angry ministers by doing that.”

“Oh.”

“My sister could have handled the situation in a more controlled and
professional manner, however. I intend to speak to her about this as well.”

“Thank you. That would be nice.”

“I won’t make a habit out of this, however. You need to work out your
difficulties with your wife without a mediator. In fact, you should really talk
to her about what has happened.”

“I should?”

“Open wounds that are not treated will fester and decay. Your relationship with
Celly is your responsibility, not mine. You need to deal with these issues as
they come.”

“Oh, right,” he said thoughtfully. Though he had no idea how to even start that
sort of a conversation with Celestia he knew that she was right. He needed to be
the one to discuss the issues with her, not another.

“Wysteria, send in the next petitioner,” Luna called out.

“There’s nopony to send, Your Highness,” Wysteria replied over her shoulder as
she looked down the hallway.

“Oh. Well, I suppose this would be a good time to relax.  Tell me, Anon, do you
enjoy—”

A sudden coughing fit overtook her, and Anon watched her hack for a good twenty
seconds before she finally brought herself under control.

“You’re not getting sick too, are you?” he asked with concern.

“Don’t be ridiculous. I had a shield up when I visited this morning. I am not
getting sick.” > 29. - A Wrinkle In Time >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“This is all your fault,” Luna grumbled as she blew her nose into an
already-overused tissue.

“It’s always my fault,” Celestia replied with annoyance and a matching honk of
her own.

“Oh, stop that, you two,” Horsenpfeffer admonished. “You’re worse than my
twins.”

“She started it,” Celestia muttered.

“I’ll finish it, too,” Luna weakly threatened.

Horsenpfeffer groaned and bopped Luna on the nose just hard enough for it to
smart. “It’s not her fault. You could have caught this from anywhere.”

“This is Anon’s doing. He infected me somehow,” Luna groused while rubbing her
snout.

“He did not. Non Pegasi can’t carry the virus. You picked this up from a pegasus
somewhere.”

Discord’s amused chortling drifted over from the corner, and all three mares
turned to give him an icy stare.

“You do know the feather flu can jump species, right?” the good doctor remarked
dryly. “And, opposite though they may be, you do have wings.”

Discord immediately stopped laughing, sat up straight and emitted a honk from…
somewhere, gulped as his left eye twitched and then promptly disappeared in a
flash, leaving nothing behind but the smell of menthol. Both Luna and Celestia
chuckled at the revelation before passing a tissue box between them for the
eightieth time.

“Where did my husband disappear to?” Celestia asked.

“I told him to go order a nice warm stew from the kitchens,” Horsenpfeffer said.
“And I believe he said something about checking with Wysteria to make sure there
was nothing that needed to be done.”

Celestia snuggled down into her pillow with a sigh. “Order? My Anon is a most
disobedient spouse. He’s going to make something, and since both of us are
indisposed, he’s going to make a lot of it.” The corners of her lips turned up
ever so slightly, even after another long nose blowing. “Don’t worry, dear
sister. I’ll share.”

“Good,” Luna sighed. “A warm bowl of anything would be most welcome right now.”

“He shouldn’t be long.” Celestia chuckled. “If I were to guess, I imagine he is
being a rather large pest in the kitchen right now in an effort to help both of
us feel better.”

“Well, other than the Feather Flu, I think you’re fine,” Horsenpfeffer announced
to Luna. “Your treatment is the same as your sister’s: lots of orange juice and
rest. If you exert yourself, you’ll stay sick longer. Also, stay away from
anypony with wings.”

“I will.” Luna nodded. “Thank you, Doctor.”

“You’re welcome. I’ll be back in the morning to check on you,” she continued.
“If you need me before then, just send Prince Anon after me.”

“We will, but we will also try not to disturb you.”

“Sounds good. Good evening, Your Highnesses.”

Luna and Celestia shared a round of coughs between them as the doctor left, and
then Luna moaned. “I hate getting sick.”

“That makes two of us,” Celestia added. “But, I do have to admit it has been
peaceful to simply rest. I didn’t realize how nice it could be to let somepony
else take over for a time.”

“Perhaps this will cure you of your workaholic nature then.”

“Probably not.” Celestia chuckled. “I know I need to ease up but it’s hard to do
so after a millennium of being unable to.”

“You should, though. You’re going to drive away your Anon if you don’t.”

“Drive him away? He’s been helping me run the kingdom already.”

“Has he, in truth?” Luna asked with a wary eye. “From what I have heard, his
help was most unwelcome yesterday.”

“That wasn’t help,” Celestia said, her mood souring instantly with the mention
of the incident. “He was pandering to me, Lulu. I told him about Daybreaker, and
then he decided to start walking on eggshells.”

“Hmm. Are you sure that was his only motive?”

Celestia glared at her sister. “Lulu, you know I can tell when someone is lying
to me, and when they’re trying to stay on my good side.”

“With most ponies, yes. But I would suggest your view might be a bit skewed when
it comes to the one who has your affections. You look at Anonymous in a
different way from me, or Wysteria, or anyone else. He has a singular place in
your heart, and that changes things.”

“Luna, he was trying to placate me when I wasn’t upset.”

“All right. Let’s say you’re totally right, and that all his actions yesterday
were only to ‘placate’ and pacify you. How did you decide to tell him that you
did not appreciate what he was doing?”

“Well, I had a talk with him last night after he apologized for being
ridiculous. He agreed that he was wrong, and then we kissed and made up.”

Luna gave her a flat look. “Celly, you never just talk to anypony when you’re
upset. You lectured him, didn’t you?”

“No. I had a conversation with him.”

“What was the ratio of talk time between you and him?”

“Well, he…” Celestia stalled, and offered a cough. “He really didn’t say
anything.”

“Forgive me if I am mistaken, but I do believe a conversation requires two
active participants. When one pony speaks and another listens, that is a
lecture.”

“No! It was… was…” Celestia tried to think of how it hadn’t been a lecture, but
her efforts failed.

“It was a lecture, and I would suggest that you really didn’t make up afterward.
If I forced him to tell the truth, I am willing to bet he would say he did no
wrong and that he felt irritated by your reaction.”

“Why didn’t he say so, then?”

“Anon is someone who likes peace, Sister, and he’d rather let you be right than
have a fight about it. He wants you to be happy, so he let you win.”

“But he should have said something.” Celestia pouted.

“If he had, would you have listened to him?”

Celestia didn’t answer, but her ears folded back and she glanced away.

“Celly, if you intend for him to be your equal than you have to treat him as
such. He is no longer merely one of your subjects, or one of your students. You
are not the first, last, and every word in between anymore with him, and this is
doubly true when you are discussing domestic issues. You have to let him have an
opinion, and you’re going to have to let him take the lead sometimes. If he is
doing something that irks you then you have to be willing to listen to the why
behind it. What if he really just thought he was being helpful, like with the
citron pressé? Is it reasonable to suppose that he wasn’t actively trying to
pander, and that he just assumed you wanted lemonade? There are a lot of moving
parts to consider in these things.”

“I guess you’re right,” Celestia sighed after a moment of reflection. “I
probably did come down a bit hard on him.”

“One of the biggest challenges Star and I faced was making sure we were actually
communicating. You will need to watch yourself in this regard as well. Talk with
him when you sense a problem, not at him.”

“Thanks, Lulu. I’ll work on that.”

Luna blew her nose in reply just as Anon came back into the room with a
delicious-smelling pot of homebrewed goodness sitting atop the trolley cart.

“Not getting sick huh?” Anon smugly offered to Luna, and he received her tongue
stuck out at him for a reply.

“Is everything alright, Anon?” Celestia asked. “Did Wysteria need anything?”

“Everything is fine,” he reassured her. “Wysteria has taken care of the
reschedules, and I believe she’s heading home for the night.”

“Good. Hopefully I will recover enough by tomorrow to get back to work.”

“I hope so too, but more because I want you to get better.”

“Och, you’ve gone and gotten yourself sick again, haven’t you?”

Luna’s ears flicked. That voice, that delightfully deep brogue…

“What did you make?” Celestia asked Anon, as she tried to peer up and into the
pot.

“Make?” He scoffed. “I ordered a nice cabbage stew, just like Doctor
Horsenpfeffer asked me to.”

“I am not sick. This is naught but a tickle in my throat.”

“You did not,” Celestia challenged.

“I did too!” Anon protested with a laugh. “I ordered it and then ten seconds
later I got impatient and forced my way back to make it myself.”

“That sounds right.” Celestia chuckled.

“Aye, Love, you’re sick. C’mon, I’ll get somethin’ warm goin’. Ya best be
gettin’ that beautiful flank into bed.”

“Here, careful. It’s still hot.” Anon offered a bowl to Luna, and she nodded as
her magic took it from him.

“Cabbage? Thou knowest I despise cabbage.”

“Ah know, Ah know. But the war ain’t been kind to the crops, and your sister
insisted the staff cut back to half-rations to help feed the front lines. It’s
all we have at the moment, Love.”

The smell of pinewood and moss drifted into Luna’s nostrils, smells that had not
deigned to introduce themselves nor to keep her company for well over twelve
hundred years. She inhaled deeply to savor them, to relish them, and to help
recall the memories that they had brought as company with them.

“I should be at the front with my troops.”

“Och, and what good’ll that do? You’d spread that cough through the ranks and do
more damage than the ‘Squatch ever could.”

“But my place is there, with they who labor under the banner of Equestria,” she
protested. “I refuse to lead from the rear.”

“Ah, well, you best be restin’ then. Sooner you get over this the sooner you can
get back to ‘em, ya mule.”

“I am not a mule!” she said with a laugh.

“You act it sometimes,” he replied with a scoff and a smile.

Luna watched silently as Anon stood in front of Celestia and began gently
blowing across the top of the stew. Celestia chuckled as he aimed the vapor
towards her, and she took deep breaths of the savory aroma each time they wafted
towards her.

“How are things at the front, Love?”

“There are steady gains, and my sister hath raised a flag of truce to offer
terms of capitulation. Time will tell if the envoy is accepted or not, however.”

“Aye, it’d be a right day if’n them ‘Squatch could come to terms. It gets a mite
bit hard explain’ why you’re gone, and I canna help but worry about ya. Spears
pierce the hide all the same, immortal or no.”

“Oo, careful,” Anon cautioned. “It’s still pretty hot. Here.”

Celestia picked her head up and readjusted her front legs, and she gladly opened
her mouth as Anon approached with the spoon. She hummed a little as he fed her
gently, and with a gentle toss of her mane she prepared for him to come again.

“Och, here. Best not to burn you with this. Open up.”

“You sure you want me to keep doing this?” Anon asked. “I was just letting you
sample it, to make sure it was the right temperature.”

“Oh, but my dear Anon, I am sick!” Celestia gently pouted. “And you were given
instruction to keep me from exerting myself! I have just enough strength to chew
and swallow. I will need your assistance with the rest.”

“You’re terrible.” Anon laughed, as the flames in the fireplace behind them
whipped and surged slightly, and the crackle increased a tick in volume. “But if
you insist.”

“I do insist. Thy princess requireth sustenance, and thou art the only stallion
who can satisfy mine appetite.”

“Ah, yah must be sicker than I thought.” Star Struck chuckled a little, as he
scooped out another spoonful. “Broken to the point of bein’ unable to feed
yourself? I guess Ah’ll just ‘have to nurse ya back myself.”

“Thy princess expecteth it,” Luna said with a snort of happiness.

“Ah always knew you enjoyed bein’ pampered.”

“I am not being pampered. Thou art assisting thy very weak and famished wife.”

“‘Assisting.’ Darlin’, you may be a warrior on the surface, but deep down you’re
a princess, and ya enjoy bein’ treated like one. You’d keep me here, waiting on
your every need if you could.”

“And I would regret not a moment of it,” she said with joy.

The flames surged again in the fireplace, but Anonymous and Celestia were so
absorbed in each other’s eyes that the action went unnoticed. Luna smiled to
herself as Anon would gently blow across the stew in the spoon, move carefully
to feed it to Celestia, and then retreat and start again once she had delicately
sipped the succulence off and smiled anew.

Luna smiled more as she continued to watch. Hundreds of years had passed, and
yet love still had the astonishing power that it always held. A princess had,
again, allowed a pauper into her heart, and a pauper was willing to climb the
near-impossible mountains of expectation in order to have his princess. Love was
weaving two hearts into one, caring not for station or power or custom. He was
hers, and she was his. What else mattered in the end?

The fire once again surged, and Luna closed her eyes softly. Nothing else had
mattered then either.


 * *  🌙 * * 


Aye, there ya go. How’s that cough feelin’?”

“Better.” Luna hummed. “If thou wilt continue to provide to my needs in such
manner, I believe my recovery shall be swift and sure.”

“Glad to hear it. I hate to see you sick.”

Luna softly slurped the contents of the offered spoon, and she quickly booped
Star Struck’s nose before he could pull back again.

“I love you.”

“Aye, I love you too.” He chuckled. “Even when you’re actin’ like a mule.”

“Thou wouldst be most displeased if I was not, and thou knowest it.”

He simply nodded to this, and offered another spoonful to her. “Aye. I canna
deny that. Yer just perfect.”

Luna purred a bit, and a happy silence passed between them for a few minutes as
he continued to spoon feed her. He then chuckled, and she gave him a curious
glance.

“What doth amuse thee?”

“Ah, nuttin,” he said. “Just thinking.”

“Wilt thou not share thy thoughts?”

“Och, ‘tis nuttin’ but a memory.”

“Please?” Luna gently asked, before taking another sip. He gave her a soft
smile, and then sighed happily.

“D’ya remember the first time ya raised the moon with me?”

She hummed as the memory instantly came back to her. “I shall never forget it.”

“‘Twas a night I dunna think I could ever forget either. Ah knew yer were up to
something when you invited me out on that veranda, but no stallion in his right
mind could turn away from that teasing flick o’ the tail ya gave me.”

“Thou hast always had a strange fascination with my backside.”

“D’ya blame me? That ‘backside’ o’ yours is mesmerizing,” he said with a laugh.
“But then you draped your wing over me, and Ah thought Ah’d never find a deeper
happiness.

“But then you raised the moon,” he continued that soft and smooth tone that
drove her absolutely wild. “There Ah stood, under the wing o’ the most beautiful
mare to ever grace the fields o’ Barra, watchin’ as the magic of the moon mixed
with the gentle caress of your side against mine. Ah just couldn’t believe that
a low-born mud-trotter like me could ever catch the attention of a princess, and
Ah had not only done that but Ah’d somehow fallen in love with ya.

“And then you leaned in close to my ear. You have a voice that can shake the
very stars above, but when you started to whisper you were as smooth as silk.
You told me of your love for me, how you cherished me. You spoke of how Ah’d
changed you, tempered you.

“And you told me you’d give it all up if you had to. The titles, the power, even
the moon itself if’n it came to that. All of it was nuttin’ if you couldn’t have
me.

“Ah knew, right then, that Ah couldn’t live without you. We had been woven
together, so fast and tight that the only way to separate us was to rend the
very heavens themselves. Come what may, my destiny was with you, from then to
forevermore.

“Heh. It’s amazin’ how one moment like that can change everythin’. Right then Ah
knew that Ah knew, and Ah could never turn away from you without turnin’ away
from myself.”

“Hmm,” Luna sighed happily. “And thou hast remained, amidst toils and
tribulations most severe. Thou hast been a most loyal companion, and I will
forever be grateful for thy devotion.”

A soft tapping came at the door, and Luna visibly grew eager in anticipation
while she sat up and turned to face the source of the sound.

“Och! Who’s makin’ all that fuss?” Star Struck called out playfully. “Get in
here and present yerself!”

“Can Ah come in? Auntie Celly says Mum is sick.”

“Get in here, yah wee rascal!”

The door nudged open just enough for a small lavender unicorn filly to stick her
head through. She wore a worried look, but as soon as she saw Luna’s
outstretched arms she flung the door open and galloped over as fast as her
little legs could carry her. Both she and Luna laughed as they embraced, and
Luna gave the small bundle a quick noserub after they had done so.

“My precious little Twilight! How art thou this fine evening?”

“Ah’m good, Mum,” the blank-flanked filly replied with a huge grin. “Are you
really sick?”

“Indeed, but ‘tis nothing more than the Feather Flu. Thy father hath been most
attentive to my needs, and I believe my recovery shall be swift.”

“Good, ‘cause you said when you got back you were gonna show me how you raise
the moon.”

“I did?!” Luna gasped in faux surprise. “Mine illness must be most severe. I do
not recall any such promise.”

“You did too!” Twilight protested vehemently. “You said Ah could help you raise
it!”

“Ah, now the memory returneth,” Luna said with a sly smile. “You will want to
raise it tonight, I suppose?”

“Uh-huh!” Twilight replied with a vigorous nod of her head. “Ah’ve been goin’
over all the instructions you gave me. Ah calculated the relative velocity,
accounted fer atmospheric interference and weight distribution—”

“Aye, that she has,” Star Struck confirmed as Luna glanced over at him in
surprised joy. “Ah’ve even caught her mumblin’ things like ‘apogee’ and
‘sidereal rotation period’ in her sleep.”

“And how have thy studies with Master Starswirl fared?” Luna asked her daughter.

“Uh, well…” Twilight twiddled a hoof on the floor. “My grades are good, Mum,
they really are.”

“But?” Luna asked after the pause.

“But he’s so BORIN’!” The little unicorn couldn’t help but blurt out. “All day!
Nuttin’ but formulae and theory and conjectures. He dunna know how to have fun!”

“Aye, our little Twilight Starbright got herself into a wee spot o’ trouble
yesterday,” Star Struck added.

“Oh?” Luna asked.

“Ah canna help it if Starswirl canna take a joke,” Twilight muttered. “All Ah
did was turn his beard green.”

“Green?” Luna chuckled. “Thou madest his beard green?”

“Yeah! Wasn’t hard neither,” Twilight announced in pride. “All Ah had to do was
sneak a reactive agent in to his prune juice. I dunna know how he figured out it
was me, though.”

“Thou art a wee rascal indeed,” Luna said with a laugh. “While I do not condone
thine actions, Master Starswirl doth need to ‘lighten up’ in my opinion. If thou
dost vex him again, make sure thou art not caught.”

All three of them laughed at this before Twilight piped up again. “Ah will. So
can ya show me how to raise the moon?”

“I suppose I can,” Luna replied, and her little filly whooped in joy. Another
knock at the door interrupted the celebration, but all three were pleasantly
surprised when they saw who had knocked.

“Auntie Celly!” Twilight cried out.

“Good evening, Twilight!” Celestia replied, as she placed her golden helm down
and strode into the room. “I trust thou art well?”

“Yeah! Mum’s gonna let me help her raise the moon tonight!”

“Ah! Wonderful news!” Celestia replied. “Thou art sure to be an expert at it,
just like thy mother.”

“What bringeth thee back here, Sister?” Luna asked. “Thou art still in thine
armor, so thou must be leaving again soon.”

“Of a truth, I return only to share good news with my friends. The Sasquatch
have surrendered and accepted the terms of capitulation! The war is now at an
end.”

Twilight whooped again, and Luna shared a quick nuzzle with her husband to
celebrate.

“I must return to oversee the disarmament and to ensure compliance with the
terms, but I felt that thy recovery, dear sister, might be expedited if thou
knewest of these things. I have given thy division to Flash Magnus to oversee,
and thou art relieved of thy duties at the front. Stay, be with your family, and
rest. I shall return when all is completed, and we shall then have a banquet in
celebration of our victory.”

“Will it actually be ‘our’ victory this time, or wilt thou somehow make it thine
own success again?” Luna replied darkly.

“Now,” Star Struck interjected. “this is not the time to be pickin’ more fights,
love.”

“Very well,” she replied before focusing back on Celestia. “Now leave before
thou art struck down by my illness as well!”

Celestia chuckled and recovered her helm with her magic. “By your leave, then.
Fare thee well.”

“Well!” Luna announced after Celestia had left. “My spirits are most renewed.
Come, my precious Twilight. Tonight thou shalt assist me in raising the moon.”


 * *  🌙 * * 


“Now, remember that the moon will be much heavier than thou art anticipating.
Thou must—”

“Ah know, Mum! Ah know,” Twilight protested.

“Ya best be lettin’ her get to it. She canna take the anticipation anymore.”
Star Struck laughed.

“All right. Since thou art so eager to proceed,” Luna replied. Twilight let out
a grunt of anticipation, quickly twisted to face the east, then crouched
slightly and flared her horn.

“Och, she looks like a right proper stinkbug she does,” Star whispered to his
wife.

Luna began to protest, but she had stop and hold back her laughter as her
daughter began wiggling her rump slightly and swishing her tail. “All right. Art
thou in harmony with the moon yet?” Luna asked while draping a wing over her
beloved.

“Just...about…” Twilight grunted.

“Remember, thou shouldst feel the harmony. Tis not something thou canst touch
with thy natural senses.”

Luna’s own magic began to work, and she gently weaved her magic in with her
daughter’s. She felt along the threads Twilight had created, and she was
impressed. Her daughter had everything nearly perfect.

“Now, guide it up.”

Twilight grunted in exertion. Despite all of her bravado earlier, Luna could
feel her young one straining against the weight of the moon, and she smiled
deeply. With a touch of her own magic to assist, the moon gently rose over the
treetops and into full view.

“Ah did it,” Twilight panted, the exertion showing in her flushed cheeks as she
turned to face her parents with a pleased smile. “Ah did it! Ah raised it!”

“Aye, and a fair job ya did of it too,” Star Struck remarked. “Good job, Lass!”

“Can Ah help again tomorrow?” Twilight eagerly asked her parents. “Please?”

“I believe that can be accommodated,” Luna replied, and she laughed with her
husband as Twilight began cheering and hopping around in a circle in joy.

“D’ya think she’ll be able to raise it on her own one day?” Star asked.

“That I am unsure of,” Luna replied, and her gaze turned back to the silver orb
before them. “My magic is greater than hers, and…”

No. Not here, not now.

“Love? What is it?” Star Struck asked.

Luna’s eyes narrowed as the featureless expression of the Tantabus began to
drift across the moon. There was only one reason why it would show now.

“Leave,” Luna commanded. “This memory is not given to you, nor will it ever. You
are to remain within the dream that I have created for you. Disobey and you will
cease to be.”

The Tantabus paused, and Luna almost thought she could see defiance moving
across the deep purple aether that made up the nightly reminder of her betrayal.
After that moment was over, though, it complied and slid out of view, and Luna
turned to her husband and offered a wane smile.

“Forgive me, Love. My thoughts became troubled for a moment, but they are
hampered no more.”

“Are yah sure? I dunna know what ya rebuked but it seemed serious.”

“I am sure, Star. Come. Let us dwell on this no more. I believe we shall now
make a daring midnight raid of the castle’s stores in celebration of my
daughter’s achievements!”

“Yes!” Twilight cheered. “C’mon! If we hurry we can beat the patrols!”

“Oy! How d’ya know how to do that?” Star Struck called out in amused alarm as
his daughter shot off into the keep.


 * *  🌙 * * 


“Did she really?” Celestia asked.

“Yup. She’s out,” Anon confirmed.

“Dear Lulu.” Celestia chuckled warmly. “Good thing she raised the moon before
her energy left her.”

“I’ll go get another blanket,” Anon offered.

“Good idea. She’ll need it tonight if she has the chills like I did.”

“I hope she doesn’t,” he said before moving back towards the closet. “What do
you suppose she’s dreaming about?”

“Something pleasant, I hope,” Celestia said with a sigh. “She always seems so
tortured when I see her sleeping, so restless. I sometimes wonder if all those
nightmares that she fights off somehow affect her own sleeping.”

“That wouldn’t be fun.” Anon walked back into the room, nearly covered in a
thick blanket. “She deserves to have sweet dreams when she sleeps.”

“That she does,” Celestia agreed. She smiled deeply as she watched Anon unfold
the blanket, drape it over Luna’s sleeping form, and then tuck in the edges
around her body to keep any cold drafts from disturbing her.

“There we go,” he announced once he was finished. “That should keep her warm.”

“We’ll keep an eye on her tonight, too,” Celestia replied, lifting her wing and
allowing Anon to snuggle in beside her again. “But, I guess when I say ‘we’ I
should really say ‘you.’ I may not be so easy to rouse this evening.”

“I don’t mind. One night’s worth of lost sleep is worth having the both of you
feel better.”

“So devoted,” Celestia replied warmly as she nuzzled him. “Thank you for
everything you’ve done today.”

“Aww,” he stammered. “You’re welcome. Just don’t get sick again!”

Celestia laughed. “If I can help it in any way, I will certainly avoid it.” >
30. - Understanding >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Celestia, Princess of the Sun and Ruler of the Day awoke with a bit of a start.
She yawned, smacked her lips, and then moved to boop her Anon.

She would have succeeded, too, were it not for the fact that Anonymous had
pulled his disappearing act yet again. She really needed to ask him how he
managed to do that.

“Anon?” she called out softly.

A loud snore from Luna came in reply, and Celestia winced as she realized that
neither of them had taken the anti-snoring pill last night. It was little wonder
he had slunk out, because he was probably worried about long-term hearing
damage.

She then bit her lower lip in playfulness. A game of hide and seek with her
Prince? The idea had great appeal. But where would he have gotten to?

“Hmm,” she cooed. Perhaps he had snuck away to the north tower again. It would
be familiar, and not too far away.

A quick glance at the clock told her she had thirty minutes before sunrise,
which was more than enough time to find him and then smother him with apologetic
kisses. After a playful giggle and a quick check in the mirror to make sure she
was presentable enough to leave the room, she then moved out into the hall and
off towards her prize.

The guards in the hallway offered a salute as she exited and began her search,
and she nodded pleasantly to each one when she casually strolled by. She felt
quite renewed, she realized, and all of the horrible symptoms of her illness
from yesterday had cleared out. This burst of energy was a bit difficult to
contain, but she didn’t want to tip off the whole palace to her motives and fun.

Once she reached the north tower, she gently and carefully eased the door open
and peered inside. Sadly, there was no Anon, only an unoccupied room that
awaited a guest. With a mischievous huff, Celestia pulled the door shut and then
casually began walking to the next potential location: the kitchens.

“He could be making breakfast.” She considered the concept with delighted glee.
“A nice omelette, maybe, or some delicious buttermilk biscuits.”

But this turned up no Anon as well. Chef Beet and her staff hadn’t seen him that
morning, but she was kind enough to offer waffles and hash browns for the
morning meal. Celestia accepted the offer with a graceful smile, and then
resumed her search.

She really didn’t think he would be in the dining room, but she peeked in just
to be sure and quickly confirmed her suspicions. She then moved towards the
throne room with a bit more enthusiasm, the throne was comfortable enough to
sleep on. She should know; she had dealt with so many long-winded petitioners
after long and restless nights that she had finally taught herself how to sleep
with her eyes open.

This, however, came up clear as well, and now she was growing eager and a bit
concerned. She was confident he wouldn’t leave the palace, but why would he go
anywhere else within?

“Perhaps he asked for a guest room—any guest room—where could rest,” she
considered softly to herself. “Mm, but that would take the rest of the day to
search.”

In the interest of time Celestia decided to cheat a little. She sent out a quick
searching spell to locate what room he could have been placed in, but even this
came back Anonless, and that moved Celestia into the worried category.

“Why would he leave?” she muttered to herself as she moved back towards her
room. “Unless he got called away for something, but what could possibly…”

She then had a sudden realization, and she smiled deeply to herself. There was
one other place he could be, somewhere somewhat quiet and yet close enough that
he could respond quickly if he needed to.

“The balcony.”

She opted for a teleport spell this time, and she was quite pleased to find her
assumption had been correct. Her marvelous Anon was near the far edge, his body
facing east and leaning on the railing. Her poor husband had fallen asleep while
standing, and Celestia imagined he was going to be a bit sore once she woke him
up.

She giggled a little while sliding up next to him, and she started to gently nip
at the base of his neck. His eyes twitched, and a soft moan of happiness gurgled
out of his throat, so she slowly began moving up towards his cheek. His head
rose as she moved upward, and a pair of puckered lips awaited her once she
reached the top. She took the invitation but teased him with just a quick peck,
and he let a moan of sadness out before blinking his eyes open.

“Ungh?” Celestia attempted to make a word out of Anon’s moan before offering
another light giggle. “I think that means you were expecting more?”

“I was,” he simply replied.

“Well, you impertinent human you, I don’t kiss just anyone,” she said as she
retreated back and stood at her full height. She tried to look stern, but the
playful smile that tugged at the corners of her mouth gave away her true
feelings as she continued. “I am the Princess of the Sun, after all. I have very
exacting demands, and no male has been able to measure up. I reserve my
affection for those who are deserving of it, those whom I trust and care for. I
refuse to let my royal lips—”

Anon wasn’t going to wait for her to finish her speech. He simply leaned
forward, and in one swift move he locked his lips to hers and wrapped his arms
around her neck. They stayed in this embrace for several long minutes, and when
Anon finally did pull back Celestia fluttered her eyes open and gave him a
deeply pleased smile.

“You keep sticking your tongue in there like that and you’re going to reverse
the colors of my mane.”

“Ah, but I’m just brushing up on my diplomatic knowledge. I think the Prench
enjoy kissing in this style, don’t they?” Anon asked.

“Indeed they do, but that is only part of a true Prench experience. Tu parles
prançais, mon amour?” Celly quipped, her transition to Prench flawless.

But Anon was not to be outdone without a fight on this one, and he smiled
deeply. “Un semestre à l’école secondaire. Et c’était pour impressionner une
fille,” he said, and Celestia smiled deeply. His words were choppy, provincial,
boorish, and he was speaking through his nose; but it was respectable for
Equestrian standards at least. In time, he could stand up to diplomatic
scrutiny, with some tutoring.

This was a prospect that made her extremely giddy.

“Pour une fille? Comme c’est romantique.”

“ça n’a pas vraiment… something… oh, whatever the phrase is for ‘it didn’t work
out.”

“Quel dommage,” Celestia said softly. And her loss is my gain.

“Is that what it is? I haven’t really spoken it since then. I’m probably giving
the pronunciation a slow and painful death.”

“Not quite that bad. You could pass as a better than average tourist, but for
what we do I will need to—” she snuck in so close that her breath tickled the
fur of his ear “—give you a few lessons.”

How her heart leapt when his breath hitched and shuttered at her words. It was a
completely new and wonderful take on the phrase ‘hanging on her every word.’

“And how would you do that?” he whispered.

“I would start with your pronunciation. You should speak slowly but confidently,
much like how you would add spices to a simmering pot. Each word should be
finely seasoned and dressed, and served in the most delectable manner possible.”

“Could you give me an example? I always do better if I can hear it as opposed to
reading it.”

Celestia took a brief moment to deeply breathe in the scent of her beloved, and
with his unique blend of eleven herbs and spices on her mind, she offered her
deepest and truest feelings to him. “Mon amour le plus cher, vous n’avez aucune
idée combien j’adore votre passion et votre fièvre.”

“My dear, your whispered words taste like the purest golden honey to me,” Anon
softly replied, and she giggled as she watched his hair on his neck stand on end
and his face flush with pleasure before he continued “I have never realized
before how the fullness of your syllables and the elegance of your tones set my
world alight. Even your lilts, oh sweet harmony! How your lilts make me ache for
you to say more.”

“Quand nous nous embrassons, je suis à nouveau une jeune jument ravie,” she
cooed into his ear. “Tu me fais frémir et souffre pour ton amour. Dites que vous
serez à moi.”

Celestia knew he had only comprehended half of her words at best, but the magic
of her love in her voice more than made up for the gaps. He really could only
offer one simple and breathless response to her.

“Oui.”

Her wings gently enveloped him in a deep, feathery bliss. “Ma moitié.”

His eyes shone as deep as the waters on the coast of Mareseille back to her as
he leaned close and simply stated, “Ma ange.”

“My stars, I am trying to get over being sick and I wake up to this.”  Luna
stuck out her wet tongue as she strolled up to them.

The moment was broken but far from forgotten, and the two lovers moved back to a
neutral stance with a chuckle before her desired wing settled once again into
its familiar place across his back.

“Well, you fell asleep in my room so it’s your own fault,” Celestia replied with
another quick kiss for her prince.

“It probably is, so in the interest of not interrupting this moment any
further—and to aid my own recovery—I’m going to lower the moon and then go to my
bed. You two can do whatever you want, just leave me out of it.”

“We will, don’t worry.”

Anon simply watched as Luna took a few steps past them to do her work. She gave
him a quick smile as she did so, and Anon felt his awe grow anew as her magic
gently moved up and touched the moon.

“Celly?” he whispered while Luna slowly began moving her heavenly object below
the horizon, “May I ask you something?”

“Of course. What is it?”

“Is the magic that you use to move the sun the same magic Luna is using now?”

“It is, but the technique is different. When I raise the sun, I have to use a
more forceful and heavy touch, if you will. The moon is… oh, I hate to use the
word delicate, but that’s really the approach you must take with it. If I hauled
it up like I did the sun, I would fling it clear across the sky and the night
would last for five seconds.”

“The moon is delicate, Anon.” Luna motioned with one hoof for him to come up to
her. “Its purpose is to provide serenity and peace, introspection and
revelation. There is a reason poets don’t use the sun when they speak of self
discovery. In the day, one performs their labors, and their mind is consumed
with the needs of the now. Night allows a pause, a moment to see beyond. The
pressure of the day is lessened, and the mind is able to clear. Memories are
more vibrant, and the pleasures of the past can be easily recalled.”

Her wing moved over the top of him, and as she finished floating the moon behind
the mountains, she turned and gave him a smile. “And this works for all, be they
pauper or princess. Thank you, Anon, for allowing me to see that again.”

“See what again?”

“Something I needed to see, a memory from long ago. Your love for my sister will
have a far-reaching impact, whether you know it or not. Keep loving her, and you
will bring about great things.”

He nodded with a hint of a blush, and Luna gave him a larger smile before
releasing him. Luna then took flight, and Anon walked back over to Celestia with
a bit of a worried look.

“It is okay that she…?”

“That was a friendly hug, nothing more,” Celestia replied with a small grin.
“You need not fear sharing the bed with the two of us again, unless we should
come down with the flu in the future. This was simply her way of accepting you
as family.”

“Okay,” he replied in relief. “I need a few lessons in that arena too.”

“I do believe I can help with that.”

“So may I safely assume at this point that you are feeling better?” he asked, as
her wing again moved around him and gave him a squeeze.

“Mm, I feel marvelous.” Celestia purred while she lit her horn and began to
raise the sun. “Thankfully, I think I caught the twenty-four hour version of the
flu. I’ll still have Doctor Horsenpfeffer do a quick check to make sure, but I
think she’ll say I’m just fine.”

“Good. I’m sure the staff will appreciate your recovery as well.”

“They’ll appreciate me not getting them sick,” Celestia said with a laugh. “But
did you get any sleep at all?”

“Here and there. I wanted to still be nearby if you needed me, but between you
and Luna snoring, I thought I’d wandered into a sawmill. Out here wasn’t so
bad.”

“Not a very comfortable place, though.”

“Yeah, not so much.” He chuckled while the sun began to warm his skin. “But
since you are feeling better it was worth it.”

“I will make sure I take three pills tonight to make sure you get the rest you
need,” she said with a quick boop. “Do you feel rested enough to accompany me to
breakfast?”

“I think I can handle that, yes.”

“Good. After that we’ll go over Wysteria’s notes and you can tell me all about
day court.”


 * *  ✹ * * 


Anonymous was sure he was going to explode.

Really. He was going to literally explode.

All right, maybe not literally, but if she doesn’t say something soon…

“So, this is the only petition you looked over by yourself?” Celestia asked as
her magic sorted the papers again.

“It is,” Anon whined. Celestia glanced at him with what he thought was a
disapproving look before turning back to the papers.

“You came up with this all on your own?”

“Well, no.” he replied. “Wysteria and Discord helped me decide what to do,” he
stated before righting himself. “But it was my call.”

“And Discord now wants you to attend his tea dates with Fluttershy?”

“Yes.” Anon cringed. “Depending on what’s happening here, of course.”

I will own up to my actions, no matter what.

“Hm.”

Anonymous was not going to be able to take this much longer. His heart was
racing in his chest, and he was fidgeting with his Celestial Crystal as if it
was the sun itself. “I, uh… I did get permission for you to come too.”

“You did?” Celestia asked flatly, and Anon nodded. “You invited me as well.
Huh.”

“Well as my wife, you are my immediate choice for a plus one at parties.”

Celestia offered no reply to this, and Anon’s willpower snapped.

“I screwed up, didn’t I?” he moaned. “I should have waited for you to recover. I
shouldn’t have made the decision without you or Luna. I overstepped my—”

Anon’s rant was silenced when Celestia’s magic grabbed his lips. She then leaned
in close to him and gave him a sugary sweet smile.

“Stop that. You did nothing wrong.”

“I didn’t?” he blurted as soon as her magic released him.

Celestia gave him a long and reassuring kiss before replying. “You did not. In
fact, I think you did everything right.”

“Really?!” he asked with a small squee of delight in his voice.

“Indeed my love. You took all the facts into consideration, consulted with a
trusted advisor, listened to your instincts, and used some remarkable diplomatic
skills to turn an unknown factor into an asset. I’m actually really impressed
that you managed to not only include Discord in your decision process, thus
giving him a chance to be useful, but that you also managed to enlist his help.
I’m not sure I would have even thought of that. With him performing some
occasional surveillance on Miss Glimmer on top of your inspectors I believe the
situation is under control. You did good.”

He stammered and twiddled his fingers, but Anonymous was immensely pleased that
his wife approved of his work.

“I think this calls for a reward,” Celestia continued with a sultry look.

Anon’s eyes shrank to pinpricks. “A what?”

“A reward,” she offered in a soft and seductive tone.

“Oh! Uh, well…” he stammered.

“Oh, don’t worry. I’ll be gentle.”

Anon started to go white, and when he spoke his voice was just above a whisper.
“Gentle?”

“Yes.” She nipped his ear, brought her body close to his, and rubbed her neck
sensually against his. It was electric, and Anon really thought he might pass
out from joy.

“How much further do I need to take this?” she cooed. “I didn’t take you for a
voyeur.”

“Voyeur? What?” he asked, but then he noticed that the Discord in the stained
glass had just folded his arms tightly and pouted.

“Oh, foo!” The draconequus grumbled before pulling himself out of the glass and
taking solid form before them. “I thought it was an odd tonal shift from you. I
should’ve known.”

“Any particular reason you are spying on on us?”

“Spying?” Discord scoffed. “Really, Celly. I could care less about all that
mushy stuff. I just stopped by so I could hear you say it.”

“Say what?”

“That I did a good job,” he smugly said. “C’mon! Admit it!”

“Discord, you did a good job.”

“Now, I know you’re not used to saying that… wait. What?” Discord looked at her
with a bit of confusion. “You just agreed with me without an argument. No
conditional hedging. Not even any whining or pouting. You even sound... happy.”
He folded his arms and leaned across the bushy hedge that stretched across the
corridor. “You take all the fun out of it.”

“I don’t need to argue with you,” Celestia said with a smile. “You did do a good
job, and thank you. Your advice to my dear Anon was thoughtful, accurate, and
wise; and I do greatly appreciate your willingness to help keep an eye on this
Starlight Glimmer. You proved to be a good friend to Anon when he needed you the
most, and for that you have my most sincere thanks and deepest gratitude.”

“Oh!” Discord replied, and he tapped his chin in thought. “There’s something
ponies say at this point, what was it? Something that means ‘thanks for the
thanks.’ I know I know it. Starts with a ‘W,’ I think.”

“Welcome?” Anon offered.

“That’s it!” Discord held a blinking sign reading ‘Winner!’ above Anon’s head.
“You’re welcome! Oo, what a fun word. I bet Fluttershy will love it when she
hears me use it.”

“I’m sure she will,” Anon said with a shake of his head.

“Well, I do have to run, but if you need me again just give me a shout. I’m more
than happy to give you some pointers. I did rule Equestria for a time after
all.” Discord chuckled, snapped his claw, and disappeared. Once Celestia took
another look around the empty corridor, she gave Anon a long nuzzle.

“That got a little heated,” Anon remarked.

“That it did.” Celestia gained a bit of a blush across her cheeks. “I’m sorry
for leading you on, but ruse or not, you did seem… receptive.”

“Well… y-yeah.”

Celestia paused and looked at Anon earnestly. “What was that?”

“I don’t know,” he muttered, and his gaze went to the floor. “I just… I do,
but…”

“Don’t worry about it, my Anon.” She whispered with a nuzzle to his ear. “When
you’re ready. I am a firm believer in letting love progress naturally. For now,
I am most content to simply have you. You have brought a joy into my life that I
did not know I was missing.”

“And you have done the same for me,” he said softly. “I don’t think I would have
ever found true joy if I hadn’t met you either.”

“Then be reassured, my Anon, that I feel our relationship is right where is
should be. The love you give me fills me with light and hope, and I do not want
for anything. You have brought me pleasure incomparable, and I have no doubt
that you will continue to do so.”

“Thank you,” he whispered. “I don’t know that I’ll ever fully understand how I
won your love, but if I have it then I am complete.”

“And for us, that is all that matters,” she said with a nuzzle and a nip on his
neck. “And though I do wish we could remain here and whisper sweet nothings to
each other I’m afraid we have that meeting with the Ministry of Peace in five
minutes. But, perhaps we can discuss this more later…”

She nipped his ear, and he replied in turn with a nip on her jawline. They both
then laughed and playfully began bumping their bodies against each other as they
began the journey to their next meeting.


 * *  ✹ * * 


Anon sighed in contentment as he walked through the gardens. The meeting with
the Ministry of Peace had ended quite a bit sooner than anticipated thanks to an
intern forgetting to bring the documentation Celestia and Anon needed to look
over. Since they had time, they decided that it would be nice to take a stroll
through the gardens. Wysteria had then stopped them just as they had left the
interior of the palace with a few rescheduled items to go over with Celestia,
and she had told Anon to go ahead and they would catch up.

He still had to admit that the gardens were spectacular, and a part of him
wished he had grabbed his notebook so he could take another shot at describing
the grounds, and maybe even those fateful sunflowers.

“Well, maybe I’ll try again tonight,” he told himself softly and with a chuckle.
“Maybe I’ll be able to do it without having to stand in them.”

He then stopped abruptly. Just around a bend, and on a bench that sat across
from the sunflowers that had changed his life, sat a pegasus with a yellow coat,
a powder blue mane, and what looked like a trio of sego lilies on her flank.

“Sego Lily?” he asked himself. “I wonder why she’s here.”

He quickly moved towards her, eager to share the wild ride he’d been on since
their last meeting and to see what had brought her back to Canterlot. Given how
their last meeting had gone, he figured she would get quite the laugh out of the
story.

Her eyes were closed and remained so as he approached, so he was able to
unintentionally sneak up on her.

“Sego?” he called out when only a few feet remained between them. “Is that you?”

Her eyes shot wide open and her pupils immediately shrunk to pinpricks. “Anon?”
she groaned. “Figures.”

“Hey, how are ya?” Anon asked with a smile. “Didn’t think I’d see you again so
soon.”

“And I really hoped I’d never see you again,” she bitterly shot back.

“I’m… sorry?”  Anon reeled back slightly at the sudden verbal slap to the face.

“You were engaged to Celestia and yet you led me on like that?”

“Celestia? What—?”

“Is that some sort of game for you, toying with mare’s hearts and then casting
them aside once you’ve had your fun?”

“Now, wait a minute.” His voice was soft and defensive.  “It was never my
intention to lead you along, or anything like that.”

There was a most hearty scoff for this statement, but Anon pressed on. “When I
crashed into you, things were different. Celestia and I were strangers tied to a
curse that we were both trying to get out of. When we learned there was nothing
to cancel out the spell we had no choice but to go forward with the whole
thing.”

“And you couldn’t be bothered to tell me?”

“Tell you?”

“Yes, Your Denseness. I stayed at the Shoe and Nail for another two days,
remember? I waited for you.”

“You did?”

“Wow, and she still married you,” Sego muttered. “Yes. I clearly said I was
staying. I even watched you come back and collect your things on your wedding
day. I… I was hoping that… well, that you would come back, and that…”

She paused, but then her glare came back in full and with a razor-sharp edge.
“Then I saw the news about your marriage. It wasn’t hard to put the pieces
together, and you couldn’t even afford me the common courtesy of a proper
break-up.”

“Break up? We had lunch together and walked around town. That’s hardly a
relationship.”

“Oh, please. It wouldn’t have been that hard.”

“Sego, really. I can understand why you’re mad, and you’re right, I should have
explained things to you.”

“If you’re trying to apologize then you can just stop right there. I’m not
interested in your apology.”

“I’m just trying to explain what happened,” he said with a note of exasperation.
“I’ll offer my apologies all the same, though. You can take it or leave it.”

“I’ll leave it,” she snorted. “You’re an insensitive clod.”

“Fair enough. I probably was in this instance.”

“Now, if you’ll excuse me.”

“Why are you here?” Anon asked as she stood, and the question made her stop.

“Why else would I be in Canterlot?” she threw back at him.

It took Anon a moment to recall what she had said before. “Your Grandma?”

“She passed away four days ago.”

“Oh,” Anon said softly. “I’m so sorry.”

“I doubt that. But thanks for the sentiment, I suppose. Anything else?”

“Just that I don’t want us to end our friendship like this, with you storming
off in anger. I’d like to talk about what happened, and to help you through
whatever it is you’re feeling.”

“Was there a part of you that had any interest in me, even in the slightest?”
she asked in a small voice.

“Yes, there was,” he answered truthfully. “That night, when I returned to the
palace, I actually wept over what I couldn’t have. I felt horrible that I
couldn’t have you.”

Sego turned to face him fully again. “You’re not just telling me that, are you?”

“Honest to Luna, that’s the pure truth,” he replied. “I really thought we could
have had something, before I found out I was bound to Celestia because of
everything. Had that law not been in effect, I would have pursued you.

“But, if I hadn’t booped Celestia’s nose there was a good chance I wouldn’t have
ever met you, either. The only reason I was where you were that day was because
Celestia told me to check out the museum. It wouldn’t have happened otherwise.”

Anon allowed Sego to think this over for a moment, and then he continued. “If
you want to be mad at me, that’s fine. But don’t be mad because the relationship
didn’t work out. Even if we had been given the opportunity to try and be
something more serious, who says it could have been? There’s a chance we could
have hated one another. With things the way they are now, we can still be
friends, or at least I would like to still be your friend.”

Sego sniffled and wiped her nose on her arm. “You should have told me what was
going on.”

“I should have, yes. I won’t deny that.”

“You shouldn’t have led me on.”

“I’m still not quite sure how I did. I was being a friend, nothing more and
nothing less.”

Sego paused, and her wings ruffled a bit. “I’m still mad at you.”

“You can be mad for as long as you like. But at least understand that whatever
harm I inflicted wasn’t intentional.”

Sego’s gaze turned to her hooves. “I suppose I might have put more into what was
between us than I should have. You were just the first person who ever treated
me kindly. Most just think of me as some kind of… well…”

“Then they are dead wrong,” Anon offered. “You are more than whatever they
thought, and eventually you will find the one meant for you. One of the greatest
things I’ve learned from this whole mess is that the future might not be what
you thought it would be, but there’s a good chance it can be something even
better, if you let it. If Destiny has it out for me, then I’m sure there’s
something for you too.”

“I don’t know if I can believe that.”

“I think you’ll be surprised,” he offered. “I know I was.”

Sego didn’t say anything back. Anon let a mental sigh go across his mind, and
then he decided to have this end, one way or the other.

“I can introduce you to Celestia, if you’d like. I know she’d like to meet you.”

Anon smiled in happiness when Sego looked back up at him with a small grin. “You
could? I’ve always wanted to meet her.”

“I can. I do have an in with her now, after all.”

“That was lame,” Sego replied with a small laugh. “Will it be awkward for you?”

“No. Celestia knows all the details of what happened that day. We’ve made our
peace with it. Maybe now you can be at peace with what happened too.”

“I hope so. And I hope what you said is true. I just want to be happy, y’know?”

“We all do. The only problem is sometimes happiness isn’t where we think it’ll
be, and we have to look for it a little bit.”

“And sometimes it comes up and smacks you in the face like a wet jellyfish.”

“Sometimes, yes,” he chuckled.

“Thanks,” she offered.

“That’s what friends are for.” He smiled, and they shared a hoof-to-fist bump.

“Anon?” Celestia’s voice called out. “Who’s this?”

Anon smiled deeper as Sego Lily bowed before her princess. “My dear, this is
Sego Lily. She’s been dying to meet you.”

Celestia offered a warm smile as Sego straightened. “You have? Well, I hate to
keep you waiting! It is a pleasure to meet you too.”


 * *  ✹ * * 


“I can see why you liked her,” Celestia remarked to Anon as she gently lowered
the sun. “Sego is quite a nice mare. You would have done well if you had gone
with her.”

“I suppose so.” He shrugged inside her wing.

“Do you still think about her?” she asked gently. “Do you still think about what
could have been?”

“No,” he instantly replied. Celestia gave him a curious look.

“No?”

“I hadn’t thought about her until I saw her in the gardens. I think it’s
something like when I asked you if you thought about being a commoner. There’s
no real point in doing so, since it’s not going to happen. I’d much rather spend
the time thinking about you.”

“You are a shameless flatterer,” Celestia chuckled. “But I love it. You have my
royal sanction to continue to do so.”

“Oh, really?” he asked, and he leaned forward to draw closer to her ear. “Well,
then…”

Celestia giggled as he nipped her ear, then began to whisper into it. But after
a moment, her cheeks started to go red, and after another playful nip Anon
whispered something into her ear that made her eyes open wide and her wings pop
straight up and out with a pomph. She gave her amazed and slightly embarrassed
look Anon’s full view, and he simply chuckled a little when he saw her reaction
in its totality.

“I realized it when we were talking with Sego this afternoon. I know I’ve said I
love you, and now I want to show you in a way that I haven’t yet.”

“Are you sure?” she asked. “I don’t want you to feel rushed at all. You don’t
have to do this just to make me happy. I already am.”

“And I am happy with you as well, in a way that I could never be on my own. I
would like to show you now, and I am as ready as you are.”

“Then we run the risk of the sun rising sooner than it should,” Celestia
whispered to him.

“Let it,” he whispered back, and he began scratching in her mane. “Let it be as
bright as noon, so everypony knows how deeply I love and care for you. Let it
burn, let it soar. I never want anyone to ever doubt my true feelings for you,
and I will never let you forget how much I care for you. I will be yours,
forever and always, if you will be mine.”

“My dear, sweet Anonymous,” she whispered back as she nuzzled his neck tenderly.
“You will never doubt my love for you either. I will give you the one thing that
I have never fully given to any other: my heart. It is yours, completely, to
have and to keep.”

“Then I will treasure it beyond the stars and back again.” > 31. - Afterglow >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Princess Celestia, Ruler of Equestria, Matron of The Sun and Mare of The Morning
awoke feeling like she never had before. The morning air was cool and
refreshing, birds were tweeting joyfully as they danced among the bushes and
trees outside, and there was an energy in the air that simply had never been
there before.

There was also the slight hint of sweat that wafted up from the cushions when
she stretched out her front legs, and a blush tickled its way across her cheeks
when she recalled what had transpired the night before. Twice.

For a short time after the founding of Equestria, Celestia had listened in on an
innumerable number of ‘mare talk’ sessions between both nobles and chambermares,
and the accompanying stories of late-night rendezvous and succulent sweet
nothings had been so steamy that she eventually had to start excusing herself
from them. If the truth was to be told, Celestia did feel a twinge of jealousy
and anger towards these fortunate females. While they were living life to its
fullest, she was forced to play ‘Keep Away from Iron Hoof,’ and she had feared
what might happen to her hopes and dreams if she were to be ever caught in an
illicit affair.

As the years rolled by, she had forged a barrier around her heart. It was a
grand fortress that allowed admittance to none save Luna and her family, and she
learned how to find a measure of joy in the success of the mares who possessed
what she did not. By the time of Luna’s banishment, her feelings were so tightly
controlled by her duties and devotion to her ponies that she had stopped
thinking about intimate love all together, and thus it had remained for a
millennia.

But in one glorious evening, Anonymous had completely and utterly obliterated a
thousand years of work.

She smiled slightly to herself and gave a short hum of satisfaction. Her Anon
had given her a fruit most succulent, and now she no longer had to suppress or
ignore the cravings she felt. With him, she would experience a joy beyond
compare, and if the residual tingling in her hooves were any indication, this
joy would take both of them out past Luna’s stars.

She gave a loving glance down to her lover, her prince, and best of all, her
husband. His body was still pressed closely against her, and an adorable smile
of contentment resided on his face.

“You didn’t take your medicine last night.”

She jumped a bit at his husky voice, but she laughed outright as his smile
brightened and he peaked one eye at her.

“I will admit I was a bit eager to get to bed.” She smirked, but then a hoof
went before her nose in alarm when she realized what his statement meant.  “Oh
no! Don’t tell me…”

“If you did I slept right through it.” He chuckled, then angled his head down to
kiss her, despite having morning breath that could kill a chimera, and she
gladly indulged in his invitation.

“Think we’ll ever be able to match what happened?” Anon asked when they finally
pulled apart.

“I certainly hope so. Last night was…”

She paused, and a pleased smile grew for both of them.

“Woof.”

Anon simply nodded in agreement with a chuckle.

“Sadly, we have other things to do today.” Celestia whispered as she nipped his
hair. “I would love to stay like this but I’m afraid we can’t.”

“Pesky things and their doing-ness.” Anon muttered in contentment, and a low
groan of pleasure bubbled out of his throat while Celestia continued to nip and
tug.

Celestia had a thought come to her as she nibbled through Anon’s hair, something
additionally she could do to show in a small way how deeply she cared for him.
She mulled it over while she moved through his hair, but by the time she had
finished she was sure. “Anon, do you want to help me raise the sun today?”

“Don’t I do that every morning?”

“Mm, no, not like before,” she hummed. “You have given me something I will
treasure forever, so I wish to show you something too. Here, come with me.”

Anon stretched quickly before rising, and he trailed Celestia out onto the
balcony. Instead of turning to the east like she always did, Celestia instead
faced him with a warm smile.

“Think you can go on a short trip with me?” Celestia asked.

Anon glanced around. “Where are we going?”

Celestia smiled, and her magic wrapped around him gently. “Up.”

Anon whooped a bit as Celestia took flight and brought him along with her. She
made no special moves or course corrections, she simply shot straight up until
they had reached an altocumulus cloud that seemed to be many miles above
Canterlot. Anon gasped a bit in awe as he took in the panoramic scene before
him, and he didn’t even notice that he was standing on the cloud unaided.

“This is incredible,” he softly said. “How high up are we?”

“Oh, only about six thousand feet or so,” Celestia chuckled. “This is just about
the upper limit for the Weather Department. There are a few crazy ponies who go
even higher, but only after a lot of training and conditioning.”

“Wow,” he softly exclaimed. “I wish I had my notebook.”

“You do?”

“Yeah. I’ve never… I mean…”

“Describe it for me, please?”

“Are you sure? It’ll be rough since I can’t edit and proofread, but…”

Oh, that blissful face! It would take an army of changelings to keep him from
fulfilling the wishes of that most beautiful face.

“The countryside is now awash in the glow of the twilight of morn, and nature is
still,” he began. “The view from here is near infinite, and all is accented most
admirably the soft magentas, pinks and blues that now bathe the scene with a
subtle and yet elegant touch of nobility.

“The rolling greens add to the picture, cascading across and along in such a way
that all before it must bow in respect to the calm and respectful strength that
it naturally holds,” Anon continued. Celestia gave one of the largest smiles she
had ever given in her life when she noticed that his view was not on Equestria,
but on her. “All of this blends into a perfect union of harmony, and for the man
who finds himself in the presence of such vibrancy the words to fully describe
the singularity of beauty simply do not exist. Here, in the pastel paints of the
morning, there is the totality of meaning, of desire, of passion and of
devotion. Here, in this moment, is where I find I have truly found Home.”

“Not bad at all, my dear Anon.” She giggled, and she gave him a nip on the neck
in gratitude.

“Thanks. So, how exactly am I supposed to help you? I thought you said only a
princess could raise the sun.”

“Yes, but I never said no one could help me.”

“So, but…” he stalled. “But I can’t help you. I don’t have magic.”

“Yes you do,” she whispered.

“Ambient magic?” he asked, and she nodded. “But? But how can that help?”

"Ambient magic is not just tied to the land. It can also manipulate other
things, if it tries.”

“I think I was sick the day they explained that in school.”

"Here. Turn to the east.”

“All right,” he replied as he did so.

“East would be to your left, love.”

“Oh. Right.” He chuckled with a bit of embarrassment.

“Now, reach out towards the sun.”

“With my arms?”

“With your heart,” she replied. “In the same way your love reaches out to me.”

Anon smiled and attempted to do as his beloved had instructed. He focused on the
feel of the sun, the warmth and the light and how it moved across the sky in its
prescribed manner, and he let his heart yearn for that which Celestia commanded.

It took a moment of concentrated effort, but when he did feel his own ingrained
magic connect with the power of the sun he staggered a step or two back in
amazement. He could feel it! He could feel the power that would bow to no other
celestial object, the strength that supported life for all who dwelled under it,
and the heat that could incinerate all who approached unaware unless it was
tempered, controlled. This was the heat he had known all his life, the heat that
both baked bread and warmed hearts.

The heat of passion that he now felt towards Celestia.

“I feel it,” he whispered to Celestia. “It’s incredible.”

Her horn lit as she stood side-by-side with him, and he felt her magic begin to
weave in with his. The weft and the warp of the two magics into one was as
intense and yet resplendent as anything his mortal mind could ever possibly
comprehend. He realized that if he would remain so intertwined with his wife—if
he never allowed anything to tear what had just been woven between them—then he
could not and would not ever want for anything.

She would give him everything he could ever need, want, and more.

“Bring it up, my love,” Celestia stated with a broad smile.

And when he attempted to do so, Anonymous felt something. With the sun rising
under the combined power of his wife and himself, he felt a magic surge that
penetrated his whole being. It moved through him, enveloped him, and caressed
him in a way that only Celestia’s magic could. From his head to his toes, and
from his arms to his legs he felt it.

And there was only one other thing that could compare to the bliss he then felt.

When he finally felt that the sun was in the proper position for the day, he
gently lowered his arms, and then felt a small jolt of surprise when his legs
again touched the cloud beneath him. He had been flying, in a literal way? How
could that have been?

“Anon!” Celestia called out with a gasp of surprise. “You! You’ve!”

“What?” he asked.

“You have a cutie mark!”

Anon twisted around and looked at his flank. “It did?”

Indeed, it had. A perfect replica of Celestia’s cutie mark now resided behind a
book on his arm, and the pages bore words, words that Anon was unable to read.

“Oh, Anon!” Celestia said with a happy sob.

“Wow,” was the best word Anon could come up with to describe the situation.
“This is… just… wow.”


 * *  ✹ * * 


“Uh, Twilight? I normally don’t question the scientific method, but are you
really sure this is going to work?” Anon asked with a nervous chuckle.

“First off, the scientific method is a body of techniques for investigating the
phenomena of our world. What I am doing simply one step in that process,” she
replied while making sure the straps on Anon’s colander helmet were secure.
“Secondly, I know this will work. The Whooves-Gait test is the most accurate and
well-known cutie mark analytic test in existence.”

Anon gave Celestia a worried look, and she returned a reassuring smile before
replying.

“She’s right. Besides, do you really think I’d let my faithful student do
something that had the slightest possibility of harming you?”

“I suppose not.”

“Now, since I’m doing a test on your cutie mark you’re going to feel a slight
tingle just under your skin.” Twilight handed Celestia a pair of welder’s
goggles and placed a pair on herself. “This is normal, but please say something
if you feel a burning sensation, all right?”

“What’s with the goggles?”

“Safety first!” she shouted. Celestia quickly pulled her goggles down over her
eyes as Twilight reached for a large electrical lever, and Anon winced slightly
when the switch was thrown with a slight maniacal laugh.

The test was… well, it was bizarre. Anon squirmed a bit and tried to keep from
laughing, but it wasn’t easy. It felt like someone had taken one of Celestia’s
feathers and was somehow using that to make every square inch of him ticklish.
Thankfully, it only lasted for about twenty seconds or so before Twilight
switched the machine off again and moved eagerly to the printout that was now
spewing from an opening on the side of the machine.

“See?” Celestia offered. “Not that bad.”

“It tickled,” he replied while trying to scratch everywhere. “That is normal,
right?”

“It is. I would actually be more worried if it didn’t.”

“All right,” Twilight announced. She held the readout out for Anon to look at
while she continued. “Your cutie mark is a cutie mark for sure. You are not
suffering from cutie mark pox.”

“That’s good to know,” Anon replied. “And?”

“Well, that’s about it. There’s no anomalous readings.”

“Again, good to know. But how did this happen?”

“I think I have an idea,” Celestia said.

“Yeah?”

“Cutie marks indicate a special skill or talent that a pony has, but that
doesn’t mean that they are locked into a certain position in life. Take Rarity
for example: with a cutie mark of three gems one could infer that she is a
miner, a jeweler, or a geologist. If you do not know her, it would be hard to
believe that she is a seamstress and a fashion designer.”

“Okay, I’m following you so far.”

“So, you had no cutie mark, and you admitted that you were unsure of your place
in the world. I think that you had chosen the first step along the path to your
destiny, but there was more potential for you to fill.”

“And... now I don’t follow.”

“It’s a bit difficult to explain,” she said. “Let me try this way. When a pony
gets their cutie mark, they usually understand why. A pony knows what skill or
talent it was that is connected to it. But you had no cutie mark. You’ve said
you were confused, and that you never felt like you belonged in the world of
cooking, so there were still questions. Since you never found that clarity, your
destiny remained in flux.”

“So, I could choose my destiny?” he asked while Twilight was removing the
helmet.

“All ponies can choose their own destiny regardless of their cutie marks,”
replied Celestia with a quiet giggle. “But we’ll save that for another time. For
now, your choices affected your destiny, and now your cutie mark reflects it.”

“So…” Anon thought out loud while taking a moment to make another awkward
examination of his arm. “So, my destiny now is to be your husband?”

“It would seem so.”

“Not a bad destiny to have. What does the writing on the pages say?”

“It’s a variation of the Alicorn law marriage clause, written in the old equish
I used when I wrote it.” Celestia replied. “It says: ‘my nose now knows to whom
it belongs, and I shall remain with her until the end.’”

“That is severely cool. My nose is smarter than I thought,” Anon remarked while
twisting to look at his other arm. “So let me make sure I’ve heard you right. My
cutie mark reflects my new destiny with you.”

“Yes.”

“With whatever being a husband to Princess Celestia entails?”

“Imagine what I have to teach you, and what we can learn together,” she replied
with a nuzzle and nip of his neck.

“That’s a pretty good destiny. I think I’d like to to keep that.”

“I believe that means you have to keep me,” Celestia said with a small purr.

“Oh, how horrible,” Anon replied in faux agony while gently petting Celestia’s
neck. “I have to keep the most wonderful mare in existence? However will I
manage it?”

“A good question. How will you keep me?”

“Tenderly,” he replied softly. “Gently, and with respect. I will keep you by
showing you my love, in all the ways I can think of and hopefully in some ways
that I can’t think of at the moment. I will tell you how much I love you, daily,
and I will do whatever I can to make sure you are happy. I will be the husband
you deserve, that you need, and if I ever am not, I will work with you so that I
am.”

“A lofty goal,” she replied with a nip in his mane. “But may I add one thing?”

“Of course.”

“Be my equal,” she whispered in feathery light tones. “Don’t be my slave, or my
servant. Work with me, together. Don’t let me pull too much of the load, but
don’t pull more than you should either. We are partners now, and a dual-yoke
cart only moves forward if both pull evenly.”

“Partners.” Anon moved to look her square in the eye. “I like that. Partners in
love, partners in deed, partners in life, and partners in government. I’d even
go so far as to be partners in crime with you.”

“Good thing I’m not that type,” she replied.

“Oh, there might be a naughty bit in there somewhere,” Anon said with a
mischievous bite of her neck. “If there is, I’ll find it.”

“I have no doubt you will,” she laughed.

“Shall we return now? I do believe we still had some meetings planned for this
afternoon.”

“In due time, my Anon.” Celestia replied with a kiss. “All in good time. But
first, I think we should discuss those grandfoals your mother wanted…”

“NOT IN HERE!” Twilight protested. “Goodness, there’s a baby dragon here!”


 * *  ✹ * * FIN  * * ✹ * * 

> Bonus - Nightmare Night Special! >
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Nightmare Night?” Celestia asked with concern.

“Yeah!” Anon exclaimed with a prancing tapdance down the hallway while snagging
the helmet from the nearest guard. He then placed it on his own head, but the
intended effect would have worked better if he had put it on the right way. “Why
not?” he asked through the ear hole.

“I don’t know, love,” Celestia replied, and her ears folded back slightly. “It’s
not exactly an anniversary I like to recall.”

“Well, then we change the meaning,” Anon said. “Just like how the Summer Sun
Celebration is different now.”

Celestia’s face was still set in concern. “That’s different. Changing a holiday
to commemorate the return of your sister is one thing. How do we change the
meaning of the day my sister became corrupted, and at my hooves?”

“Well, It’s not about your sister, I would argue,” he said softly while removing
the helm and returning it to its proper owner. “It’s about the legend of
Nightmare Moon. I never have heard anyone refer to Luna at all when they
celebrate it, and we could argue Luna is dressing up like Nightmare Moon for
Nightmare Night. Besides, you have to admit it would be fun to go play some
games with the Elements and to just relax for an evening.”

“It does sound fun,” she admitted, and she gave his nose a kiss. “All right.
I’ll try it, but only because you’re cute.”

He gave her a broad grin and returned her kiss. “Thanks. If it turns out you
hate it, I’ll never bring it up again.”

Celestia then tapped a hoof against her chin in thought. “You know, I think I
might even have a costume idea…”


 * *  ✹ * * 


“Anon, love? Are you almost ready?” Celestia called out from the bathroom.

“How do they get this stuff on so quickly again?” Anon shouted back. Celestia
finished applying the last of her fake eyelashes with a smile as he continued.
“I’m not even sure if I’ve got it on frontwards or backwards.”

She chuckled at his frustration and she blinked rapidly to ensure the eyelashes
were on securely. Once she was satisfied with her appearance, she strode out
into the main room where she found Anon struggling with a buckle on his modified
set of royal guard armor.

“Here, let me help,” she offered, and her magic quickly straightened out the
strap and buckled it for him.

“Thanks,” he offered, but then he snickered a bit as he saw her completed
costume. “I still can’t believe you’re willingly dressing up as a giraffe.”

“The giraffe is a noble species with exceptional taste in leaves,” she said with
a sniff of haughtiness and a sly grin. “Besides, it plays well to my physical
attributes, and from what I’ve heard everypony is going as a clown this year so
I’ll be different.”

“Well, you’ve got me there,” he said as he grabbed his helmet. “Are you going to
hide your horn and wings?”

She nodded, and with a small pulse of magic they disappeared from view. Anon
took a moment to look over his wife, and he had to admit she’d done a good job.
The spots running up her back and neck contrasted nicely against her now yellow
body, the ossicones sat nicely in her mane and in between her ears, and she’d
even wrapped part of her tail up in faux fur to complete the look.

“You look good,” he offered. “I’d almost bet some ponies don’t even recognize
you.”

“Thank you,” she said with a toss of her mane and a giggle. “Are you ready? It’s
just about time to go.”

“Just need my hat.” He placed it on his head with a grin. He then felt a small
tingle go through his skin, and when he looked back over himself he found he now
looked exactly like the other guards. “Ah, I see you got me a fully functional
set of armor. It's pretty impressive that it can turn even me into a guard
stallion. How do I look?”

“Like a Guard.” She chuckled. “I’ll have to make sure I don’t lose you in the
crowd.”

“I don’t suppose there will be too many guards there. Even if so, I’ll stay
close.”

“Good. I think having my knight by my side will be most helpful.”

Anon gave her a curious glance. “Helpful?”

“I have never liked Nightmare Night, love. Who wants to celebrate the loss of a
beloved family member? All it has done in the past is remind me of the loss of
Luna. I’m only partaking now because you asked me nicely and because I would
like to move to a different viewpoint on the whole thing. I don’t like feeling
how I feel about this night. I want to enjoy it with my little ponies, and the
only way I see to do that is to participate in it with you.”

“Hey, I’m sorry,” Anon said with an illusionary hoof on her shoulder. “I might
have been a bit too forceful in participating in the festivities tonight. I
didn’t fully appreciate your feelings on this. Really, we can just stay here.”

“Thank you, but you didn’t force it.” She smiled and kissed him. “I want to do
this.”

“I tell you what: if it turns out that, for whatever reason, you want to leave
we will. If you still hate Nightmare Night after this, I’ll never bring it up
again.”

“Fair enough,” she replied, and she gave him a quick kiss. “Thank you.”

He gave her a warm smile and offered a hoof. “Shall we?”


 * *  ✹ * * 


“Princess Celestia?”

“Good evening, Twilight!” Celestia replied, as she and Anon stepped off of the
chariot. “Happy Nightmare Night!”

“Uh… thank you?” Twilight Sparkle replied. “Forgive me, but I really didn’t
expect you to be taking part in Nightmare Night.”

“Well, I am hoping to change that. Besides, Prince Anon tells me he likes those
chocolate covered wafers.”

“Oh. I’m a bit surprised he’s not with you.”

“Who says I’m not?” Anon said.

Twilight yelped, and she retreated a step. “Anon? You dressed up as a guard?”

“Why not?” he said slyly. “Celly says I look good in armor.”

“I just… okay.” She took a deep breath, then smiled. “I’m glad you’re both here,
really. I think Spike is almost ready to go, so as soon as he comes out we can
go check out the carnival.”

“My sister is still planning on attending tonight, right?” said Celestia.

“I haven’t heard otherwise,” Twilight replied. “Is that going to be an issue?”

“No,” Celestia replied, but with a bit of hesitation behind the pleasant smile.
“It will be fun to spend the evening with her.”

“Oh, hey Princess!” Spike called out while he shut the door to the library. “I
love your costume!”

“Thank you! You look quite dapper as well.”

Spike smiled smugly and straightened his top hat while twirling one end of his
curled moustache. “Thanks. I didn’t go overboard, did I?”

“Not at all,” Celestia replied with a glance over his freshly-pressed suit and
tie. “I especially like the monocle. It makes you look very distinguished.”

“Heh-heh, aw.” Spike laughed. “I thought it would match Rarity pretty good.”

“Oh? Who is she going as?”

“You,” Spike said with a dreamy laugh. “I even helped her find some gems to put
in her mane and in the regalia she made.”

“It sounds like a most detailed costume! I can’t wait to see it,” Celestia said,
and they began walking towards town.

“Hey, where’s Anon?” Spike asked. “He didn’t stay in Canterlot, did he?”

“Boo.”

“Wah!” Spike shouted, and then he clutched his chest. “Anon, dude! Don’t do
that!”


 * *  ✹ * * 


Celestia smiled in joy as she looked out and over the crowd that was assembled
for the Nightmare Night Carnival. The entire town had turned out and the
festivities had already begun, and she was pleased to hear the gentle sprinkle
of conversation punctuated the occasional laugh from both adults and foals as
they walked into the thick of it.

Most of the costumes seemed pretty standard, with the common theme being animals
of various varieties or clowns. A few were dressed as ghosts, vampires, or some
other supernatural spook, and one pony had gone with a… well, a cardboard box,
it appeared. She couldn’t suppress her smile as a few Anonymous costumes,
complete with an imitation of his Celestial Crystal and suit, made their way
around the stalls.

“Wow!” Anon remarked while he scanned the crowd too. “I’m all over the place.
Hey, is that Wysteria’s sister?”

“Raven Inkwell, yes. The resemblance is rather uncanny, isn’t it?”

“I wouldn’t be able to tell them apart except for the horn,” Anon replied. “But
they both dressed up as vampires?”

“Wysteria suggested it. She thought it would be fun to be identical, and Raven
agreed.”

Anon chuckled a little as both Raven and Wysteria laughed at a joke that had
been shared. It was fun to see them dressed the same.

“Howdy, Princess!” Applejack’s voice called out over the crowd. “That’s a mighty
fine costume you picked out.”

“Why thank you, Applejack!” Celestia said, but then she put a hoof to her chin
in thought. “Now, don’t tell me. I think I remember this from one of the letters
I was sent. Hm.”

Applejack said nothing, but she did offer a smug smile.

“Ah! Of course. The Mysterious Mare-Do-Well! Your exploits have become legendary
among the staff in the palace.”

“You told the staff about that?” Twilight asked.

“Oh, only the highlights of course. I would never share your names. Most thought
I had found one of Spike’s old comic books.”

Anon made a mental note to himself to ask about that particular incident later.
It sounded hilarious.

“Heh, well, comics seem to be the popular thing this year.” Applejack laughed.
“And clowns. I dunno why though.”

“At least you know what a clown is,” Spike muttered. “Twilight had to go with
something obscure again.”

“Obscure?” Celestia asked. “She’s an Ursa Major. What is obscure about that?”

“Thank you!” Twilight replied, with a smug grin for Spike. “See?”

“Whatever,” he scoffed.

“Well, care to try your hoof at bobbin’ for apples?” Applejack swept a hoof back
towards the large barrel that held the game. “So far Bulk Biceps has the most
apples at twelve.”

“YEAH!” Bulk shouted from somewhere in the distance.

Celestia drew back a little and had a playful grin on her face. “Are you sure
this is an appropriate game for a princess?”

Applejack scoffed. “Oh yeah. This is one of Princess Luna’s favorites. It’s good
enough for ya. Question is, can yah handle it?”

“There is only one way to find out,” Celestia said with a determined grin.


 * *  ✹ * * 


For the next hour, Anon and Celestia had a fantastic and enjoyable time. The
Princess managed to snag fifteen apples, but she also somehow managed to lose
one set of her fake eyelashes in the water for a brief moment. Anon bested her
in the spider toss game, but Celestia’s heart beat just a bit faster with joy
when he ‘apologized’ with a large bundle of cotton candy that she was happy to
share.

“All right, every pony!” Mayor Mare eventually called out from the main stage.
“It’s time for the annual Nightmare Night storytelling! Everypony who wants to
hear a spooooky story, follow Zecora!”

“At least the Mayor is actually spooky this year,” Spike remarked while he and
Twilight began walking with Celestia and Anon. “That hockey mask is way better
than what she usually comes up with, and the rusty machete is a nice touch.”

“Spike!” Twilight admonished her young assistant.

“What?” he replied with a defensive look. “I’m just saying she’s usually not
that scary.”

“Twilight? Oh, Twilight!” Rarity called out from somewhere in the crowd, and the
five paused for a moment as a miniature Celestia worked her way towards them.
Anon had to admit she’d done a good job: her wings looked fairly real and her
mane was both spot-on for color and sparkle with the small diamonds that had
been woven into it. The tail was close but still had the trademarked Rarity curl
to it, but overall she had produced a very good... well, it was certainly not a
copy of Celestia’s distinctive look. Rarity did not do copies. It was
undoubtedly inspired by Celestia’s appearance, and had yielded a fashionable
princess of its own.

“Hello Princess!” Rarity said once she had caught up to them. “I must say, that
is a fabulous costume!”

“Why, thank you!” Celestia replied with a chuckle. “And I love yours as well.
Care to stand in for me at the next ribbon cutting I have scheduled?”

“Ah, well.” Rarity waved a dismissive hoof, but she was obviously pleased with
the praise. “Just a little makeup and papier-mâché is all this is. Besides, I’m
not much of a princess without my prince! Have any of seen my Spikey-Wikey? He
promised to escort me to the storytelling.”

“Ah, my lady!” Spike popped out and bowed deeply to Rarity. “I was hoping I
might find you here. Shall we away?”

“Oh, Spike! Aren’t you just the most precious thing!” Rarity cooed and giggled.
Anon giggled a bit himself as Celestia rolled her eyes. “Please, let us away
indeed!”

Spike offered his arm, Rarity eagerly took it, and the two walked out and ahead
of the others.

“Those two are horrible.” Twilight chuckled.

“But sweet as well,” Anon added.

“Yeah.”

The walk to the statue of Nightmare Moon was a short one, but Celestia held back
and allowed everypony else to fill in the area in front of them first. Anon
didn’t mind this, he simply leaned into his wife, and she gave him a quick
nuzzle.

“Holding up all right?” Anon asked.

“Yes. I think so,” she said. “I am slightly concerned about this, though.”

“Just say the word and we’re gone,” Anon said  firmly, and Celestia saw both
sorrow and resoluteness in his face. “Or don’t even do that. Just teleport away.
I’ll understand.”

“I don’t want to leave, though; I have enjoyed myself immensely. Let’s just see
how it goes for now.”

“All right,” he said with more than enough worry in his voice.

A puff of smoke and a clap of thunder silenced the assembled crowd, and Zecora
emerged from the white cloud with her usual white wig and spiders. She gave the
audience a eerie glance before smiling devilishly. “Every year, we put on a
disguise to save ourselves from her searching eyes.”

Luna, I will not fight you! You must lower the moon!

Celestia clamped her eyes shut. No, no, no. She wasn’t going to let the
nightmare win.

“But Nightmare Moon wants just one thing: to gobble up ponies in one quick
swing!”

I have but one royal duty now: to destroy you!

No! That was over a thousand years ago! She had paid her penance! Luna was back,
and in her rightful place!

“Hungrily, she soars the sky. If she sees nopony, she passes by. So if she comes
and all is clear, Equestria is safe another year!”

Did you really expect me to sit idly by while they all basked in your precious
light?

“No!” Celestia muttered through gritted teeth. “I can beat this!”

Dark clouds moved in across the sky, obscuring the moon and bringing a furious
round of lightning rolling along with a wicked gust of wind through the tree
branches.

“Celly?” Anon’s hand gently touched Celestia’s shoulder, but she did not feel or
hear him.

“Fill up her belly with a treat or two, so she won’t return to come… eat you!”

A wicked laugh, one that had haunted Celestia’s dreams for centuries and had
tortured her soul like nothing else ever could rang out from the sky with a
furious round of thunder.

There can only be one princess in Equestria, and that princess… will be me!

“No!” Celestia screamed, and that was more than enough to set off more screams
from the terrified fillies and colts in the audience.

“Twilight!” Anon shouted.

There was a flash and the familiar twist of teleportation magic, but then all
was still. Crickets chirped their ode to the night over Celestia’s raw and
ragged breathing, the cool night air caressed her coat and gently tickled the
feathers of her wings, and a warm pair of arms wrapped around her neck while
tears dripped from her love’s cheeks to her neck.

“I’m so sorry.” Anon’s soft words soothed away her agony and calmed her harried
soul. “I should never have brought you here.”

Celestia’s wings instinctively went to cover her Anon. Her tears mingled with
his, and she felt his love permeate throughout her whole system. In fact, it
only took a few moments of consolation before she was able to sit back and look
him in the eye.

“Thank you,” she said with a kiss.

“We should go. I’ve tortured you enough tonight.”

Celestia gently shook her head. “No. I want to stay, and you haven’t tortured
me.”

“You do?” he replied to her.

“I’ve had a lot of fun here, Anon. I’ve loved talking with my little ponies, the
games have been delightful, and I’ve been able to spend time with you. We maybe
should have skipped Nightmare Moon’s entrance, but I think the rest of the night
will be fine. Please, let’s stay.”

“If you really want to, then,” he replied. “But…”

She kissed him to silence him. “No buts. You and I are going to go have fun.
Besides, we haven’t gotten any of those chocolate wafers yet.”

“It hurt though, didn’t it?” he whispered.

“Nightmare Moon will always hurt me, I think. I… I started reliving it, love. I
was going back, hearing her words of denouncement and feeling the panic and
horror that I felt then. It was… it was painful.”

“Sister?” A familiar and welcome voice disturbed their little snuggle.

Celestia smiled deeply and released Anon so she could face Luna. “Happy
Nightmare Night, Sister.”

Luna glanced over Celestia’s costume with a smirk. “A giraffe? Really?”

“I like giraffes. They’re cute.”

Luna and Celestia then hugged. “I think I scared you when I entered as the
Nightmare. I caught a glimpse of you before Twilight teleported you away.”

“Perhaps a little.”

“Know this, then: you are not the same mare you were then, just as I am not.”
Luna then looked her sister square in the eye. “And I do not hold you
responsible for what happened. I alone chose the Nightmare.”

“But I drove you to it,” Celestia whispered, and her head dipped in shame.

“No. I drove myself. Celly, you could have given me the sun itself and it
wouldn’t have been enough. The only way you could have appeased me is by forcing
our little ponies to worship me, and I realize now that such a thing should not
and will not ever be. You were right.”

They both sniffled and fought back tears with this, and Anon simply stood aside
with a smile. It was a touching moment of divine sisterly-ness, and it did warm
and fluttery things to his heart that he was accepted enough to be present when
both rulers of Equestria let down their manes to just be as they once were, and
would be into the future.

“Thank you, Luna. I disagree with you in one area; there were many things I did
wrong. But to endlessly review them does no good to either of us. This should be
a night of merriment, so let us all go and be merry.”

“A wise idea,” Luna said. “Anon? Shall we away?”

“Let us away,” he quipped as he marched up between them. “Though I think I left
my helmet back at the statue.”

“I’m sure Twilight will bring it to us.” Celestia smiled. “Now then. Where are
we?”


 * *  ✹ * * 


The rest of the evening turned out to be a blast. Celestia and Luna had fun
challenging each other in the various games, though both were playfully
indignant when Anon managed to haul out twenty two apples in the bobbing apples
game. Any candy that was presented to Luna—or, Nightmare Moon, to be accurate—by
the fillies and colts of town was split evenly with Celestia and Anon, and all
three enjoyed dancing with the music being provided. Celestia cheered the
loudest, in fact, when the Pony Tones finished their special Nightmare Night
Review, but Luna cheered almost as loudly as Celestia did.

Almost.

It was near midnight when the party finally began to wind down, and though all
the visiting Royals were sad to have such a fun night end, they were pleased
they had been a part of the festivities and they made sure to thank everypony
for such a wonderful time before departing. As they took off into the sky to
return home, Celestia gratefully wrapped one wing around Anon and gave him a
quick nuzzle of appreciation.

“This was a fun night. We should do it again next year,” Celestia said happily.

“We should, but I think we’ll skip the story of Nightmare Moon next time.”

“I agree.” She laughed.

“So… how permanent is that dye?”

“Why do you ask?” Celestia questioned back.

“Well, I was just imagining you going to day court like that. You might summon a
Discord if you do.”

“Mm, maybe I will then,” she replied, with another quick kiss. “He hates public
displays of affection, so it would be the perfect way to torture him.”

Anon let out an undignified snort of amusement. “You are too much sometimes. I
love you.”

“And I love you, my Anon.”