Originally uploaded to Pastebin: June 22nd, 2013
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>Day Morbid in Equestria
>You are Anon
>Madman
>Wake up
>Shit, shower, shave
>Stroll over to the window and throw back the curtains
>A small town can be seen from it
>Ponyville, to be exact
>You hated going there, since you preferred your little cosy cottage
>Being a hermit was awesome
>Especially since the peace and quiet gave you ample time to work on your creations
>What creations, I hear you ask, dear reader?
>You walk into your kitchen and over to the large wooden door in the corner
>Several giant metal locks keep it nice and shut
>Wouldn't want the unfathomable horror that lies within to escape and wreak havoc upon the unsuspecting masses
>...Yet
>Grab a small burlap sack full of food off the table next to the door
>Gulp
>And undo all the locks
>The door creaks open
>The stench of death instantly fills your nostrils
>You're used to it though
>Walk down the steps and turn on the lights
>A hideous creature of insurmountable revulsion stumbles into the light
>It inspires fear into your heart
>Truly, you are a monster for creating such a vile and sinful creati-
>"Oh, hi, Anon. Is it morning already?"
>...
>You wish she would act more like a monster sometimes
"Mornin', Grubs."
>Grubs stretches
>Her front leg's stitches come undone and it falls to the floor
>You both stare at it
>"Uhh, you can fix that, right?"
>Huff and stroll past her
"Of course I can, you foolish minion!"
>"That was uncalled for, Anonymous."
"...Sorry. But I'd like it if you at least TRIED to act like a brainless drone"
>Grubs sniffs, a worm pokes it's head out of her grey/green cheek before ducking back inside
>She takes no notice of it
>"Well I might act brainless if I wasn't completely aware of my surroundings. Which reminds me, can I go outside now?"
"NO! You aren't ready."
>"For what?"
"I'm going to turn you into a brutal killing machine, then unleash you on Ponyville and watch in glee as you butcher the innocents!"
>"Why?"
"Because when I first got here, they had a party and didn't invite me"
>She blinks a few times
>Her eye falls out
>You pick it up and pop it back in, then watch as it slowly rolls around back into it's original position
>"That's kinda foalish, Anon"
"S-shut up."
>"For an insane hermit necrolord, you're a bit... Beta"
"SHUT UP. HAVE SOME BREAKFAST"
>Throw the sack at her
>It's bloodied contents spill to the floor
>The intestines of a freshly killed animal pour onto the ston-
>It's cabbage, alright?
>You were too scared to kill an innocent animal, so you just stole a cabbage from some hick with a farm hat
>She was mad as hell
>Grubs chews on the cabbage in delight
>You walk over to your table and sit down to work on your newest creation
>Something more... Compliant with orders
>Grubs was the first attempt, she's only 3 days old.
>You dug her up from a nearby cemetery and worked your magic on her
>When she came around, she didn't know who she was, but was still capable of coherent thought.
>She finishes her breakfast and trots on over to you, looking over your shoulder while you sit on your tiny wooden stool and scribble some formulas on some paper
>She slowly swallows her last bit of breakfast and nudges you
>"Whatcha workin' on?"
"A new monster. Something that will blindly follow my orders and not answer me back like YOU"
>Prod her with your quill
>She smirks
>"So you want a slave? Wow, I didn't think you were into that kind of stuff"
"Shush. Or I won't reattach your leg."
>"When exactly are you going to do that?"
"When I deem you worthy enough."
>"..."
"I-I don't have any more string..."
>"You going to head into town and steal some again?"
"Yes."
>"When?"
"Right now"
>"Do it then"
"I will!"
>"Go!"
"I AM DOING!"
>You stand up and storm out of the basement
>"AND BRING BACK SOME MORE CABBAGE!"
>Slam the door shut and lock it
>Stupid fucking zombie servant not listening to orders
>Walk through the tall grass towards the town, the sun shining on your neck as you look at your feet while you walk
>Soon. They'll all perish soon.
>...That party looked like so much fun
>You reach the outskirts of town and start sneaking
>Make a break for the large clothes shop, which is luckily out of the way in terms of other buildings
>Dive into a bush and look around
>No one noticed you
>Reminds you of your romantic life
>Ha! Good one, brain!
>Aaaand now you're sad
>With a glum look upon your mug you peek through a window
>Observe the shop owner mill about, stitching this and that while seemingly singing to herself
>Watch her needlework intently
>You need to learn how to do that. Grubs' leg has fallen off 4 times in the short time she's been alive
>The damn thing just won't stay on.
>You're tempted to melt the skin together. Not like she can feel pain
>She might not approve of you attacking her with fire though
>Grubs may be a servant, but she's got a mean slapping hoof
>The shop pony exits the room, leaving a large spool of pink string on the floor
>You were told her name once, when you got here, but you've already forgotten it
>It's been like, a year since you got here
>You've spent most of that time fixing up the hut you found outside town and researching the wonders of necromancy
>But now is not the time for memories. It's the time for theft
>You sprint around the side of the shop to the front and burst through the door
>Grab the string
>Run your ass out of there before the pony can reappear
>"Hello? Is any pony there?"
>Too slow, shop-horse. You're like a phantom
>Chuckle and scurry towards the tall grass as you have done a hundred times before
>Turn and look back at the shop window
>The pony is looking confused
>Another successful heist
>You plod through the grass on the way back to your hut, clutching the thread spool in one hand
>The sounds of birds chirping accompanies you
>You lazily trudge homewards and pay no mind to the pony that steps out in front of you
>Wonder why the world is moving so fast
>Slam down on your front
>It knocks the wind out of you and your thread goes flying
>Rub your head and stand up
>Look at what you tripped over
>A small yellow pegasus is nursing her leg and looking sorry for herself
>She sees you and freezes
>You gulp, not sure what to do
>Not so stealthy after all, genius
>The pony slowly takes a step forwards, a nervous look on her face
>"Umm... H-hello?"
>Your eyes dart around for the thread
>Can't find it
>"I-is this yours?"
>The pony offers up the spool on her hoof, giving a small smile along with it
>Snatch it and nod
"Thankyougoodbye"
>Take off running back to your hut
>Grubs will be thrilled to hear about your conversation with the pony

"So I says to her "Fuck you, you filthy pegasus. Why don't you go back to pegasusdale or whatever the shit that place is called". Fucking Pegasi, right?"
>Grubs' face is completely deadpan
>Ironic, given that she's technically dead
>"That never happened, did it, Anon?"
"N-no."
>She sighs and nudges her dismembered limb towards you with her muzzle
>"Could you please reattach my leg?"
"Fine, fine... Don't know why I bother talking to you anyway"
>"Because I'm the only pony you CAN talk to?"
"Shush."
>You sit down on your stool and lay Grubs over your lap
>She goes still and patiently waits for you to stitch her leg back on
>The worm from before makes a reappearance
"You gonna get rid of that worm?"
>"No. I like him"
"He's gross"
>"You're a terrible necrolord, you know that?"
"I'm better than you"
>"That's not... Whatever."
>You finish stitching the leg and turn to your undead minion
"Alright, Grubs. Here's the plan."
>Jab a finger at the papers on your desk
"If we're going to level this pathetic town and reforge it in undeath, we'll need these ingredients"
>She looks over the papers
>"I have no idea what any of these things mean."
>You look at the papers
>It's upside down
>God dammit
>Turn it the right way up
>"Ooooh, that seems easy enough. But uhh, I think this might be a problem."
>She points at your most critical material
>Peer at it
>Scrunch up your nose and look back at her
"And what -exactly- is so hard about getting hold of twenty five cadavers?" 
>She gives you an "Are you actually serious" look
"You'll just have to go to the cemetery where I got you!"
>"...What do you mean 'me'?"
"You don't seriously think that I'm going to get my hands filthy digging up bodies, do you?""
>She scowls at you
>Pat her on the head
>Her eye falls out
>Push it back in her skull
"Good girl. Chop chop! Or I'll kill you and reanimate you."
>"You won't do that because you don't know how, you bloody ape"
>Ouch.
>"And what are you going to be doing anyway?"
"Getting the other ingredients of course! I'll have to 'neutralise' several targets in order to get them safely, though."
>"You're going to run into town and steal them again, aren't you?"
"Yes."
>"You're not going to hurt a fly, and are instead going to run around screaming if you get caught, aren't you?"
"Y-yes."
>"Alright then. When are we doin-"
>Knock knock knock
>You stare at your minion
"...Did you just say 'knock knock knock'?"
>"No."
>She turns her head slightly and raises an eyebrow
>"I... I think you might have a visitor"
>Your brain struggles to process this
"What should I do?"
>Knock knock knock
>"Probably answer the door."
"But I've never had a visitor! What should I say?"
>"I don't know! I've never left this damn basement!"
"Oh yeah. C-can you come up with me?"
>"What, so that if things go wrong I can take care of them and tick one cadaver off your list?"
"Well more as a sort of 'security blanket', but sure, that as well"
>She shakes her head and trots towards the stairs
>"The shit I put up with..."
>Push past her, laughing nervously
"Uhh, I think I'll take the lead, thank you very much, minion."
>She rolls her eyes
>Luckily none of them fall out again
>You walk upstairs and towards the door
>Your palms are sweaty
>Knees weak
>Arms are heavy
>Reach it and look back at your minion, who is looking at you from the top of the basement stairs
>She points a hoof at the door and jerks her head to the side
>Gulp
>Open the door
>Look down 
>The pegasus is there
>Uh oh
>You both stare at each other for a good while
>A gentle breeze drifts on by
>Shuffle nervously
"Can I help you?"
>"Umm... My name is Fluttershy."
>She takes a step forwards
>"What's yours?"
>Look to the left
>Grubs draws a hoof across her neck then gives you a quizzical look
>Shake your head
>Turn back to Fluttershy
"Anonymous. And I don't want to buy anything. Good bye."
>Slam the door
>Lean against it
>Listen closely
>Hear a defeated sigh and the flap of wings
>Grubs tentatively steps out into the kitchen
>"Is she gone?"
"I think so"
>She looks around
>"So this is where you live... I thought it would have been dirtier"
"I'll have you know that I'm a very clean person!"
>"And since when did a necrolord concern himself with keeping things neat and tidy?"
>She looks towards your expensive dishes that you stole
>They looked nice and no one else seemed to want them
>Grubs snickers
>"Nice plates, oh lord-of-darkness"
"SHUT UP AND GET BACK IN THE BASEMENT, WHELP"
>"Nah, I think I'll stay up here. It's been ages since I saw the sun"
"Fine. Well you can at least help me create my monster while you're up here."
>"Sounds good. Wait, you wanted me to dig up bodies, so I would have come up here anyway. Why are you so concerned about me-"
"STOP POKING HOLES IN MY LOGIC. YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE FULLY SELF AWARE WHEN I MADE YOU."
>"Why didn't you just kill me and try again then?"
"imscaredofblud"
>"What?"
"Nothing."
>You both head down into the basement and plan until nightfall
>Grubs' stomach growls
"How do you even get hungry?"
>"It's plant matter or you, milord. Choose which one or else I will"
"Okay! Fine! We'll steal some apples on the way to the graveyard"
>"So you're coming with me then?"
"I need to make sure you don't get the wrong kind of bodies"
>She squints at you 
>"That's a terrible excuse. What's the real reason?"
>...
"No reason at all. Don't question my authority."
>She mustn't know that you're also scared of the dark.
>You both fetch some spades and head out of the front door, a full moon hangs overhead, occasionally being shrouded by clouds
>A cold wind chills you to the bone
>Grubs just seems thrilled to be outside
>"I forgot how nice it is out here!"
"Zombies can't appreciate beauty. Stop trying to."
>She sticks her tongue out at you
>It's all rotten and covered in scabs
>Eww
>The darkness is giving you the heeby-jeebies, so you pick up the pace towards the cemetery
>Grubs trots along behind you obediently
>"Isn't this nice? No one's giving each other orders. Just you, me, the moon and a plan."
"Ugh. Be quiet, or I'll give you an order."
>"You just did, then"
>God dammit.
>Reach the graveyard. Tombstones and statues cover the small hill
>Walk up to the peak and survey your surroundings
>Look down at a marked grave
>"Here lies Yellow Belly. Father, Husband, Beloved Coward"
"And now he's gonna be a monster."
>Drive your spade into the soft earth and begin the unholy harvest

>5 hours and a lot of panting later, you and Grubs lie with your backs against a tombstone
>Look at the 25 bodies you managed to uncover
"Well, we did that in record time."
>"There was a record for digging up dead bodies?"
"Shut up"
>Grubs clicks her tongue
>"So how are we gonna get them back to the shack without anyone seeing? It's nearly dawn."
>Look around
>It does look like it's getting lighter
>Peer at your shack, located at the other side of town
>Critical mission error.
>Look around in a sudden panic
>Squint at something lying in the road
>Scramble to your feet and run down to inspect it, Grubs following you with a nonchalant expression
>"I don't think I've ever seen you run that fast bef-"
"SHUT UP."
>You run a hand over the wooden cart lying on it's side
>With some effort, you push it back on it's wheels
>Seems sturdy enough
>Turn to your undead abomination
"Alright, I have a plan. But it -might- be a bit risky"
>"Anon. This is insane."
"Shush! No one has stopped us yet!"
>You walk through Ponyville, pulling the cart behind you
>A large sheet hastily stitched together with pink thread and burial wraps covers the mountain of corpses in your cart
>2 fillies run around in front of you, laughing
>You feel your brow getting sweaty
>Glance at Grubs
>She's wearing something that looks like an Islamic burqa
>Only it's white, covered in dirt and smells like death
>You're half-way through the town, and the sun has just come up
>Ponies are early birds, so there are already a great number of them walking around minding their own business
>Your arms feel like lead from pulling this thing
>But it will all be worth it!
>God help you if you get caught
>"Hello there, Anonymous!"
>Freeze
>Look at the yellow pegasus, hovering next to you
>She smiles sheepishly
>"I don't think I've ever seen you around town before... W-would you like me to show you around?"
"Uhh, no, thank you. I know my way around quite well"
>Hoist the cart's handles to get a better grip and carry on pulling, your feet carrying you faster due to nerves
>Fluttershy doesn't let up, and flies after you
>"Would you like some help? I mean, if you want, that is."
"Quite fine."
>"I l-like your clothes..."
"Thank you."
>"But why are they covered in mud?"
>Look down
>You forgot that you're covered it mud, sweat and grime from your most recent cadaver heist
"Uhhh-"
>"We're mud farmers!"
>Based Grubs.
>Grubs hops down from her perch just behind you
>She walks up to Fluttershy and grabs her hoof, shaking it vigorously
>Fluttershy is clearly shaken
>"Oh-uhm. I-I, I'm Fluttershy..."
>Grubs laughs
>"Pleasure to meet you, Fluttershy! I'm sure you've met Anon before, I'm his... Uhh, wife. Rote Ing."
>Fluttershy cocks her name
>"That's a um... Odd name..."
>Grubs nods solemnly
>"Yes, that it is. My parents were..."
>She trails off
>Then looks at you
"They were... Crack addicts!"
>Both ponies stare at you
>Fluttershy is the first to speak
>"Umm. Crack?"
>Shit. They don't have crack in Equestria
"Oh yes, dangerous and horrible drug from far away. Made you crazy. They were addicting to the stuff and gave their daughter a rubbish name, haha!"
>Grubs catches on, and places a hoof on your leg
>"Yes! That's right! But Anon looked past that and saw me for who I am and so now we are husband and wife!"
>You both give Fluttershy the fakest smiles imaginable
>She's rather unnerved
>"Oh... Umm... Okay. Married? Oh..."
>She gets a glum look and flies away
>Grubs smiles up at you
>Well, you THINK she's smiling. Can't see because of the burqa
>"Nice thinking, Anon. We're on the home stretch. Now get us home."
"Yes, Ma'am"
>Pick up the cart
>Realise what you just said
"I mean, minion. SHUT UP!"
>Grumble as Grubs laughs at you
>Drag the cart all the way to the outskirts of the town, surprisingly, no one else bothered you
>Grubs looks back at the town as you leave it
>"Well I'll be. That wasn't so bad at all!"
>She takes off her headscarf. He rotting face on show to no one but the sun and the birds
>You can almost hear her smiling
>"H-hello again"
>You can almost hear her yelping and cramming her head back inside the cloth
>Chuckle
>Silly Grubs.
>Turn your head as you pull the cart up the path and look at Fluttershy
>"Um. I know you said that you're uhh, married. But do you think it would maybe be possible if you could be so kind as to consider maybe umm..."
>She starts getting flustered and flies off
>Look over at Grubs
>She shrugs and cautiously moves a hoof to pull off her headscarf again
>"Okay, I'll t-try again"
>Grubs lets out a groan
>Fluttershy, once more, hovers alongside you
>"Umm. I've been thinking about you ever since we met that day!"
"Okay."
>"I-it's like fate planted us on the same path!"
"Ya-huh"
>"B-but I know that your wife won't be too pleased. So umm"
>She moves in uncomfortably close, seemingly unphased by the smell of death surrounding you
>...Oh hey, that might explain why no one else came near you. And why people were shutting their doors and windows when you walked on by
>Awesome
>Fluttershy whispers in your ear
>"W-we could keep it a secret. D-does that sound like fun?"
>Remove a hand from a handle and push her away
"Sounds lovely. But I errr."
>Look over at the hideous zombie wearing a burqa, who is also probably laughing silently at you
"I... Love my... Wife?"
>As expected, Grubs snickers
>"I love you too, darling. Maybe we can have some fun tonight"
>OH GOD WHY
>You feel your stomach do a back flip at the thought
>Fluttershy's eyes widen
>"F-fun? Do you mean like..."
>She looks left and right then whispers again
>"Sex?"
>Grubs doesn't even hide her guffaw
>You sigh
"Yes. Sex. With my wife."
>Shudder
>Fluttershy blushes heavily
>"Ohmygoodness. I-I've never talked about sex before!"
>She moves in close
>"Umm. What's it like?"
>Hell if you know. You were hardly a womaniser back home
>Grubs is in hysterics
>"He-... Jusgimmieasec... He's a real monster in bed!"
>Fluttershy 'ooos'
>You feel your rage building
>Grubs continues
>"This one time, he was boning me so hard, I thought I would..."
>She squeaks and tries to compose herself for the incredibly predictable and unfunny punchline
>"I-I thought I would. DIE!"
>She thrashes around on the pile, screaming with laughter
"You know, DARLING. You're quite FUNNY."
>Grubs chokes on her own laughter
>"I-I know I am, dear! That's why I do it! After all, comedy is your fetish!"
>More laughter
>Sigh and look at Fluttershy
>She's giving you a bizarre look
>"It's... Your fetish?"
"Uhhh-"
>"I-is that what turns you on? Comedy?"
"I-"
>"Oh my... Umm. W-will you be at home later today?"
>Grubs descends into more laughter
>"Of course he will! He's a real basement dweller!"
>You spend a few seconds listening to her laugh
>Just then you hear a loud rip
>Grubs goes silent
>Smirk
"You alright back there, honey?"
>"F-fine."
"Good."
>Turn to Fluttershy
"Don't mind my wife. She's 'armless."
>Snicker
>"YOU'RE HILARIOUS, ANON."
>Fluttershy is just staring at you
>"S-so will you like me if I make you laugh?"
"I really don't think-"
>"G-gotta go. See you later!"
>And she's gone
>The shack is drawing nearer, though. So that's lucky
>Open the door and help Grubs down
"I told you to be careful with that thing. You nearly blew our cover!"
>"Sorry..."
>Wow. She sounds genuinely apologetic for once
>She smiles up at you
>"Hehe, blow our -cover-"
>She tugs on her burqa
>"Get it?"
>Shake your head
"Shut up and help me unload these things"
>You can't help but smile though.
>Finish unloading the bodies and storing them in the basement
>Dust your hands off and stare at the pile of bodies now resting in your basement
>Grubs is also looking
>"Shouldn't we like, store them in ice?"
"Ehh, they'll be fine. What's the worst that could happen?"
>"A bad smell?"
"Right! And it's not like anyone ever comes here-"
>Knock knock knock
>...
"Just in case, that wasn't you?"
>"Go answer the door, you big goof."
"Ugh."
>Plod upstairs and throw open the front door
>Fluttershy smiles up at you
>In a clown costume
>"A-ahem"
>She begins dancing around madly, singing a song and honking her big red nose
>Then she strikes a pose and a flower on her chest sprays water at you
>"Ta daa! A-are you laughing?"
>Glare down at her
>You'd think she would have noticed half way through your act
>"Anon? Who is it?"
"Just a clown, Gr- uh, Rotey!"
>"Should we ki- invite her in?"
"That's a horrible id-"
>Fluttershy's face has lighten up
>"Oh my! I'd love to come inside you!"
>What
>"Y-your house, I mean."
>She lets herself in
>Oh shit
>Run ahead of her and into your kitchen
>Just in time to see Grubs lock herself in the basement, giving you a pained look and mouthing "good luck"
>At least she's protecting the corpses
>Fluttershy takes a seat at your kitchen table and smiles at you
>Her nose wrinkles up
>"Oh! There's umm... Quite a smell in here!"
"Uhh yeah. It's the plumbing."
>Neither of you say anything to each other for a few moments
>Fluttershy breaks the silence
>"S-so! Umm, w-what do you do?"
"I'm a mud farmer, remember?"
>"Oh yes! Sorry!"
>She smiles
>Then loses the smile
>"What's a mud farmer?"
"It's like... A... Rock farmer. But with... Mud?"
>God, you're stupid.
>"Oh! My friend Pinkie was a rock farmer!"
>YOU GOT LUCKY, ANON.
"Riiiight! And that's what I do! I farm. Mud."
>Fake smiles all round
>Fluttershy gets off her chair and walks up to you
>"S-so a mud farmer must make a lot of money!"
"Well, I-"
>"So you have a big house!"
>It's a tiny shack. 
>"And some spare room for... 'Extra' company?"
>She winks
"Don't you know I have a wife? I thought I made that clear"
>"But she's not here right now!"
"Actually she's in the-"
>NO NO NO
"Sheee's... In town!"
>Fluttershy grins
>"Then we're all alone!"
>She takes a step forwards
>"Out here..."
>Another
>"All."
>And another
>"Alone."
>ROMANTIC COMEDIES DIDN'T PREPARE YOU FOR THIS KIND OF SCENARIO
>Or did they?
>You think back to some romantic comedies you watched in the past
>"What's the deal with airline food?"
>NOW ISN'T THE TIME, SEINFELD. YOU AREN'T EVEN ROMANTIC.
>This kiss is romantic, though. Fluttershy's lips are awfully soft
>...
>Pull back, breaking the kiss
>"Ohh~. Our first kiss! Wasn't that passionate, Anonymous? I KNEw that we were meant to be!"
"Uhhhhh"
>"W-we can start a family! You just ditch that smelly pony and move in with me!"
"Uhhhhhhhh"
>She drops her voice to a whisper
>"We can even have... Sex"
>She squeaks upon saying the word
"M-me. Wife. Hav-"
>"Yes! I WILL wife you, Anon! This day is a dream come true!"
>Your front door opens
>Grubs steps in, her burqa now on again
>"Why hello there, living- Uh, I mean, loving husband! And Fluttershy too! How are you?"
>Fluttershy blushes and steps back
>"O-oh, I was just. Umm. Leaving."
>She winks at you and whispers in your ear
>"We can keep it a secret! Just you and me!"
>She wink again and skedaddles out the front door
>Grubs kicks it shut with a rear leg and tears off her headscarf
>"What the hell, Anon? You're letting random ponies kiss you now?"
"I don't know what happened! I swear!"
>"You're so... BETA!"
"YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME. YOU'RE JUST A MINION!"
>"I'm more pony than you can handle, mister. You almost disrupted our operations. If I hadn't had come in, who knows what might have happened!"
"Yeah, how DID you get in?"
>"There's a trap door leading from the basement to the surface, behind the shack"
>Oh yeah
>That would have been easier to use for dumping the bodies in
"Look, I don't like how this pony is getting close to discovering our plot. So let's just get it done, okay?"
>Grubs smiles
>"'Our' plot, Anon?"
"My plot! MINE!"
>Storm past her and into the basement
>Grubs calls after you
>"Anon, I'm hungry!"
"THERE'S STUFF IN THE FRIDGE, YOU MONGOLOID."
>...
>"Oh my god there's stuff in the fridge! Why didn't you tell me this before!"
"I JUST TOLD YOU!"
>"Where are the apples?"
"THEY'RE IN THE FUCKING FRIDGE!"
>"You said there would be apples!"
"JUST CHECK THE FRIDGE YOU... YOU... DOUBLE ZOMBIE."
>You really suck at insults sometimes.
>Grubs manages to find some apples and trots down into the basement, look pleased with herself
>"So. Shall we get to work?"
"Well no, we still need the other ingredients"
>"You mean these?"
>She walks over to a small box and brings it back, placing it on your desk
>It's full of small vials and dead plants
"How did you..."
>"When you showed me the list of things we needed, I knew that I'd seem them somewhere"
"But how?"
>"I LIVE down here, you idiot."
"Oh yeah."
>Stare the ingredients
"We can make it, now. The monster, I mean"
>You're quiet for a while
>"You okay, Anon?"
"I dunno. You ever have second thoughts?"
>"Nope. I'm 4 days old. I haven't had to time to have second thoughts yet."
"You're a great therapist"
>"Thanks, 'husband'"
>Shudder
"Don't ever call me that again"
>"Aww, can't handle the thought of loving me?"
"You're hideous"
>"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"
"That's an excuse ugly people use to make themselves feel less ugly"
>"You're not much of a looker yourself, mister hairless ape."
>You bicker like this for 2 hours. 
"Weren't we supposed to be making a monster?"
>"I'll get the plans, you get the bodies"
"Why do I have to get the bodies?"
>"Don't be a foal, Anon."
>Sulk and drag the first body over here
>Raise your bone saw and pink thread
>Grubs returns and places the plans in front of you
"Ready?"
>"Ready."
"Let's make us a monster.

>You work all through the day and all through the night
>Hacking through bones, flesh and gristle, you steadily piece together a creature of horrific proportions
>Unlike Grubs, this thing shouldn't be too self aware
>You stitch on the final limb
"Is... Is that it?"
>"That was the last body part we had. I think it's ready."
>You stare at the amalgamation of flesh and bone
>It's basically a pony
>Made of other ponies
>It touches the ceiling, and looks like something out a Tim Burton movie
>Pink thread holds it all together, making it look kinda funny in a way
>But still terrifying
>Grubs prods you
>"We still need to add the mixture"
>Reach for the hollow needle and jam it into where you put the creature's 25 hearts
>Begin pumping the vile liquid into the monster
>Watch it in silence
>Grubs scratches her leg
>You sniff
>"You'd think it would be a bit more, exciting"
"Gotta wait for it to move first"
>"Alright"
>Several minutes pass
>Eventually, the liquid runs dry
>"What now?"
>Flick through your 'Necromancy for Foals' book
"According to this, we need a massive jolt of electricity-
>The creature moves slightly
>Stare at it
>Throw the book over your shoulder
"Welp. Books have been wrong before"
>Clear your throat
"IT'S ALIIIIIIIIIVE!"
>The monster shifts and groans as it comes to life
>You look on with a huge smile on your face
>It picks itself up off the floor and groans again, louder this time
>"MEE... HUNGRY..."
>Grubs laughs
>"Awww. He's like a big baby!"
>Nod
"A big baby with a lot of killing potential!"
>You clap your hands excitedly
>"You look like a filly on hearts warming eve."
"I don't care! This is so exciting!"
>The beast shakes it's head
>"ME HUNGRY. MASTER HELP?"
>It even thinks that you're it's master
>FUCKING. GOLDMINE.
"Ahem, Yes! I AM ANONYMOUS, BEAST! I CREATED YOU FOR ONE PURPOSE."
>The monster cocks it's head
"WE ARE GOING TO DESTROY PONYVILLE!"

>The basement door is obliterated
>A creature the size of the shack you're living in crawls out of it, you and Grubs riding on it's back
>"MUST. CRUSH."
"Ahahahah!"
>Grubs has her hooves wrapped around your waist
>The monster, you have now named "Jonathan" carries you into town like a noble steed
>That has a limited vocabulary
"YES, JONATHAN! ANNIHILATE THE LESSER BEINGS!"
>Jonathan roars and crushes a house, the ponies inside, outside, and all around Ponyville are now screaming
>A siren blares as your creature howls in excitement
>It thinks that everything is a big game.
>"LITTLE PONY GO SMASH SMASH!"
>Bricks and other stones from the more courageous ponies bounce harmlessly off his hide, and only serve to send him into a more frenzied state
>Due to his size, unicorns can't effect him with magic
>Until, that is, a large purple bolt slams into his shoulder
>Bits of bile and flesh splatter all over you and Grubs as a large hole is created in Jonathan
>He roars, his rage enhanced to levels you cannot even imagine
>A small purple Alicorn stands in the middle of the street just below you
>A confident smirk on her face, and her horn at the ready
>"My name is Twilight Sparkle! And I am here to-"
>SPLAT.
>Jonathan's leg pummels her into the dirt
>He stamps on her body over and over again until she's a mass of bloodied meat sponge
>You shrug
>Not like anyone will miss her
>Fucking Alicorns
>He continues his rampage around Ponyville, shrugging off any other punishment and generally being a nuisance
>You think about what you're going to have for dinner tonight while he tears down the town hall in a fit of bloodrage
>His screams piece the smoke filled air
>Grubs taps you on the shoulder
"Yeah?"
>"Guess who."
>Feel another tap
>Fluttershy is hovering next to you
>Rub your eyes and blink
"Uhh."
>"H-hello again! It's me, Fluttershy! In case you forgot... Umm, listen, I know you're a teeny tiny bit busy at the moment, but I was wondering if you wanted to go out on d-date sometime? Maybe in my house? Right now?"
>She blushes
>Look back at Grubs
"Is this pony serious?"
>She shrugs
>"Looks like it."
>Fluttershy patiently awaits an answer, she ducks to narrowly avoid a flying piece of building
>"S-so is that a yes?"
"No. No it's not."
>"Aww... Well that's okay. Maybe tomorrow then?"
>She flies away, oblivious to the carnage around her
>Jonathan cocks his leg over the ruins of the town hall
"Hey, HEY! NO! BAD! DOWN, JONATHAN"
>"ME SORRY, MASTER."
>Grubs tightens her grip around your waist
>"So what are we eating tonight?
"I dunno. Apples?"
>She rests her head on your back
>"Sounds good..."

The End.