>be you, Fluttershy >you know you're not supposed to leave your house unless it's important >but poor Angel is out of carrots >well, you've actually got plenty of carrots for him >but they're not the kind he likes >you bought them because there was a deal in bulk, but little Angel is such a fussy eater >he shredded them up and threw them all around the room >the poor dear was in quite a state >so long story short you had to venture out into the market today, even though the regulations make it kind of a bother to shop >but poor Angel is so hungry, and-- "HEY!!" >you cringe instinctively and back away from the angry mare glaring over her shoulder at you "Keep six feet away from me!" the mare snaps "O-oh. I'm sorry. I forgot." >the mare narrows her eyes at you suspiciously >you back tentatively away until you are an appropriate distance from her >she glares at you and turns slowly back around "HEY!!!" >you cringe as you feel your rump bump up against somepony else >you turn to see another mare glaring at you angrily "What's the matter with you?!? Are you stupid or something?!?" "I-I'm sorry..." "You should be sorry! You could be a vampire for all I know!!" >you crouch meekly to the ground and begin backing away from the furious mare, who is still yelling at you >bump >you feel your rump press against the first mare, who wheels around furiously "Gah, you again! What's wrong with you? Don't you know the rules?" >both mares are now glaring at you >you press yourself to the ground, wishing it would swallow you up >more ponies are turning to look at the commotion >oh dear >what do they want you do to? >you can't keep six feet apart from both of them "Um, well, the thing is, if maybe one of you could just back up a little, I might have room..." "Uh, YOU bumped into ME!" snaps the first mare "Yeah!" the second chimes in. "You bumped into me too! Can't you even follow a simple rule?" >the first mare seems to notice something, and peers at you suspiciously "Hey, wait a minute. Where are your garlic cloves?" >your eyes widen in panic >you completely forgot to put on your garlic cloves this morning >you look around self-consciously >everypony else in the market is wearing a rope of garlic cloves around their neck >Mayor Mare handed down the ordinance last week >a few months ago a pony had been bitten by a new and nasty type of fruit bat >she'd turned into a vampire and developed an insatiable thirst for the blood of ponies >according to Twilight the vampire infection had spread across all Equestria, converting thousands upon thousands of ponies into dark minions of the night >horrible business, that >but more to the point, it's now illegal to go outside without putting on a rope of garlic cloves to ward off the vampires "HEY EVERYPONY!! THIS PONY ISN'T WEARING A ROPE OF GARLIC CLOVES!!!" >you are now pressed flush against the ground >you can feel their horrible accusing eyes on you >you try to dig a hole with your mind powers but it doesn't work >there is a whole crowd forming around you now "What do you mean she isn't wearing garlic cloves?" demands one pony "See for yourself!" "Hey, you're right! She isn't wearing garlic cloves!" "Why aren't you wearing garlic cloves?!?" "Yeah, do you WANT us all to turn into vampires?" "Maybe she IS a vampire!" "Yeah, only a vampire wouldn't want to wear garlic cloves around her neck!" >you feel their horrible, accusing eyes boring into you >you begin to quake with fear "N-no, I'm sorry, I just forgot...you see, I have a really hungry little bunny at home..." "SHUT UP, VAMPIRE!" one pony snaps "Yeah!" "um, I'm not a vampire..." "THAT'S JUST WHAT A VAMPIRE WOULD SAY!" >the circle is closing in on you now >you take several nervous steps backward >you cringe as you feel yourself bump into somepony again "Get away from me, vampire!" the pony shouts, shoving you "Hey, don't shove the vampire into me! I don't want to get vampire-infected!" "Shut up!" "YOU shut up!" >you are literally shaking >at least everypony stopped yelling at you and started yelling at each other "Now what in the hay is goin' on here?!?" >everypony stops yelling >you look up to see who it is >oh no >no >not her >please >the crowd parts slowly to let her through >you look up, quaking with fear >yep, it's her >Applejack pushes through the crowd "Now what in the hay is goin' on?" she asks again >the first mare who yelled at you points "This pony is a vampire!" >you cringe >Applejack looks down at you and frowns "Now why do y'all think that Fluttershy is a vampire?" >the second mare speaks up "She's not wearing her garlic rope!" "Yeah, she's trying to infect us all!" another pony chimes in from somewhere >Applejack turns back to you and frowns deeply >you shrink beneath her icy stare >Applejack used to be your friend, but ever since Mayor Mare put her in charge of vampire detection she's become unpleasant to be around "This true, Fluttershy? Are y'all a vampire?" "N...no. You see, Angel was out of carrots, or, well, he has carrots, but they're not the carrots he likes..." >you trail off, because Applejack isn't listening >she rubs a hoof pensively under her chin "Well, y'ain't wearin' yer garlic cloves, an' that's mighty suspicious...and ya did turn into a vampire that one time..." >several ponies cry out in alarm "There's been a vampire in this town the whole time?!?" "Why didn't you tell us?!?" "You're supposed to be protecting--" >Applejack silences them all with a glare "please, Applejack, I swear I'm not a vampire, I just forgot the cloves today, that's all, so if I could, um, just go home..." >Applejack glares at you, and you can no longer speak "I've heard enough. I reckon we should administer the test." >there was a unanimous murmur of approval from the surrounding crowd "The test!" cried one pony "THE TEST!" cried another >no >no please >not the test >but it's too late >the ponies seize you and drag you across the market >you can see the scaffolding at the center of the square drawing closer >no >no >your knees quake as they drag you up the stairs >ponies are jeering at you >screaming at you >tears well up in your eyes as they strap the bit into your mouth >the leather straps bite into your fetlocks as they secure your legs to the pulley >Applejack takes her place at the top of the platform >her face is the stern mask of the inquisitor >no >you hate this part >somepony slips a blindfold over your eyes >you can hear ropes and pulleys tightening around you >poor Angel >he's probably wondering where his carrots are >this is why you don't like to go shopping anymore ~Fin~