Original paste date: Jun 4th, 2018

>Let me tell you a story
>Not any story, but the story of an excited earth pony
>This earth pony was a beautiful mare, bringer of the thicc, defender of-
"Yeah, yeah, I know, just introduce me already"
>Fuck you ponk, I'll introduce you whenever I want
"But then how long will it take for them to know of the other THICC filly on the other side of the road?"
>…right
>There was also Anon, who got turned into a filly because of-
"They already know that. Do you know where you are?"
>Fuck you, do you want to tell the history yourself?
"Well, since you asked so nicely~"
>No wai-
>*Writefag was kicked from server*
>There, now I have this all for myself
>*I, aka Pinkie, rub my hooves*
>Soo, where were we?
>Oh right, I decided to go outside and saw Anonfilly walking behind Twilight
>She was looking soo sad, I just had to cheer her up
>I waited a bit so Twilight would round the corner, knowing that Anon would take a while to catch up
>It was then that I decided to strike
>Jumping higher than a house, I aimed myself to land right on top of her
"Anooonn!!"
>"Wha-"
>She had turned around, just like planned
>But before she could do anything I landed on top of her and pinned her under my weight
>Thankfully she was surprised enough for me to pin her forehooves under mine
>Shaking her head she looked up to me with that sweet smile of hers
>"What the fuck are you doing?"
>Okay it wasn't a smile, it was more of her signature frowny face
>It was so cute it may as well be a smile though, don't judge me
>Anyway I decided to acknowledge the elephant in the room and go right in
"Why, you were looking so down I just knew I had to cheer you up, and who's better than momma Pinkie for that~?"
>"Fuck off, I don't need your help. Let me go"
>Her trashing, trying to free her front hooves, only made this hotter
>I leaned down and touched my muzzle on hers before speaking softly
"Say, why don't we take this inside?"
>*Writefag connected to the server*
>>Fuck you Pinkie, give me my green back!
"Nope"
>*Writefag was banned from the server*
>…
>"Uhh…did you just answer your own question?"
"Oh, right, the history, well…uhh…"
>"What the fuck are you on, you pink sperg?"
"Sorry I forgot what this history was about, want a cupcake?"
>Quickly you took a cupcake from inside your hair with your hair curl
>It's not like you hadn't held stuff with it, Anon didn't even seem surprised
>"Sure, I guess, can't say no to free food"
>You waited a bit for the question you were sure she would make eventually
>"Uhh can you release me?"
"Nope"
>And then you proceeded to stuff the cupcake inside Anons mouth
>As always, giving 3 taps and pushes with your hair, to make sure it got all inside at once
"There, don't you feel happy already~?"
>"Anon!"
>You were so focused on the filly under you, you didn't even see Twilight coming back, no doubt searching for her filly
"Oh hi Twilight! Looking for this filly here?"
>You lifted yourself out of the coughing and trembling filly that was looking a bit blue-ish
>"Pinkie! What did you do to her?"
"I didn't do anything, I just saw her following you all frowny and sad"
"So I gave her a cupcake, she looks much better now doesn't she?"
>"Better? Her face is blue! She, she's asphyxiating!"
"Oh, that answers that"
>Twilight started running to try and help, but you acted quicker
>Employing all your earth pony strength to give Anon a kick to the stomach
>The paper wrap then flew just high enough from her mouth for you to land a kick on it afterwards, sending it flying into a nearby bin
"There, she should be fine now, if you need anything you know who to call~"
>You said to the filly, before crushing her into a Pinkie™ hug and then pronking away
"Nothing like another satisfied customer"
>*Not Writefag joined the server*
>Alright, not banning me this time, I went and bought a pro account just for this, take that Pinkie Pie!
"Ohh, really?"
>Yep, now back to the green…
"Oh you silly, the green is already over"
>What?
"Yap, Twilight just left with Anon right there"
>Both of you looked at Twilight turning the corner and Anonfilly close by, not being able to see any of their faces
>Ugh, fuck me
"Only when (You) become the filly you silly~"