>”So Mr. Anonymous, why have you decided to apply as the coach to the Ponyville Prancers?”
”I’m in debt to the mafia, Mayor” 
>“E-excuse me?”
“I owe the mafia 10,000 bits because I couldn’t keep track of the fuzzy ball underneath the three red cups when they mixed them around. The one mixing the cups had some really adorable big eyes so I kept getting distracted” 
>”But what does that have to do with leading our local team?”
“I read that the coach for the winning team in the championship game gets a 15,000 bit bonus from the league. That’d be enough to pay off the mafia and and finally find out where that fuzzy ball is” 
>”Well I suppose it would be cruel to deny you the position, after hearing why you need it…”
“Great. So is the job mine?”
>”I should warn you though that your chances of getting to the championships are rather slim. It’s been decades since the Prancers have even made it past the qualifiers” 
“What sport is this again?”
>”Buckball”
“How do you play it?”
>“Maybe it would be best if we found another candidate…”
“Wait no, please, give me a chance Mayor Mare! I have no idea what the mafia here is capable of but if they’re anything like where I’m from, they might give me cement shoes!”
>”Oh my, that does sound awfully dreadful to walk around in”
“Make me sleep with the fishes!”
>”It’s Fluttershy’s job to tend to the wellbeing of our local wildlife already though”
“Air out my suit!”
>”How kind of them!”
“Plus I’m desperate. That means I’d be willing to do anything to get the team to win the league”
>”Well you make a great pitch, Mr. Anonymous. As the elected government grown up to Ponyville, I would be reneging my responsibilities if I were to deprive you of the opportunity to clear your debt and lead our team to victory. Consider yourself hired!”
“Great! Say, what sport is this again?”

“And that’s how I became your new coach”
https://youtu.be/js1THDKvQrY
>Your team looks on at you in concern both for you and themselves 
>You all are standing in the middle of the town Buckball Diamond 
>Though in your opinion it’s more of a tilted square really
>Silly Ponies
>It’s a clear early summer afternoon and the sun shines brightly down on you and your team as you hold
>Well, actually you need eight players to form an official  team
>You only have five right now
>If your team was official though, it would be ranked dead last  in the MLB (Major League Buckball) every season
>Every season a sign up sheet to join the team is placed outside Town Hall for anyone to sign up for 
>The roster was never consistent year to year and this time the volunteers were slim
>From what you gathered from the mayor, the Prancers have also gone without a coach for years now
>A solitary hoof goes up 
“Yes, BonBon?”
>”Do you know how to play yet?”
“Of course I do! I read the Rulebook on my way here”
>BonBon narrows her eyes at you
>Even if she’s half your height and you can’t really see her mouth well, you assume she’s scowling at you
“Okay, I read half the book. So I know at least half the rules” 
>Her leering continues in silence
“Alright fine, so I didn’t read the book yet. I promise I’ll do it tonight” 
>Her glare transforms into rolling eyes 
>Another hoof is raised
“Yes, Mrs. Cake?”
>”Sorry to ask, dearie, but is this meeting going to last long? I have to get back to the bakery soon and settle in with my family before nap time. My hubby gets a little cranky when I’m not there to cuddle with him”
“The only thing we have on the agenda today  is brainstorming who we could recruit. Right now we're short three players. But I do have some ideas on who we could grab”
>“Who would that be?”
“First is Pinkie Pie. Her inter dimensional powers astound and frighten me. I assume this game has catching involved somehow so she can probably catch things wherever they go. Or maybe catch them before they’re even thrown. Like I said, she scares me sometimes” 
>“Oh I’m sorry dearie but Pinkie won’t be able to play. She’s going to be babysitting the twins while I stretch out my legs and play some Buckball like I did back in NeighSchool”
“At least I won’t have to ponder the nightmarish hold she has on our reality. The next one on the list is Applejack. I know for a fact now that this called Buckball and she bucks trees for a living, so she’ll probably be good at this” 
>A timid little yellow pegasus raises a hoof up slightly, almost hiding it to herself
“What is it, Fluttershy”
>”I’m sorry to interrupt, Anon, but, well Applejack doesn’t play since she’s always busy work on her farm, especially keeping the trees watered during summer”
>Fluttershy tries to retreat back behind her pink hair and faces away from you
>”Sorry”
“It’s not your fault. You know if Rainbow Dash could join? She’s fast and probably a bit overpowered for this”
>” I don’t think she’d want to play with us…”
“Why?”
>”S-she uhh...well...y-you see…”
>You can see small beads of sweat start to form as they drop down her face
“I’ll go ask her later”
>The pegasus breaths out a sigh of relief
“Last on my list is Twilight Sparkle. She knows magic and could magic our way to victory or something. I don’t know” 
>This time a purple hoof shoots up
>Wait, that’s not a hoof
>That’s a hand 
“What is it, Spike?”
>”Twilight is going to be a bit busy, she’s working on a paper about curses that she’s going to submit to Canterlot. Apparently it has to be at least a whopping 200 words!”
>Every pony gasps at the length that Twilight will have to write, some speculating it’ll take her all year
“Okay, well that’s everyone off my list then”
>Spike speaks again in confusion
>”Wait, what about Rarity? She’s the only other Element of Harmony you didn’t talk about playing sports with us”
>Silence prevails for a few seconds
>Before the two of you laugh deeply at the idea 
>You wipe a tear from your eye 
“Thanks little man, needed that laugh” 
>He’s still clutching his stomach bellowing his laughter and can only give you a thumbs up. 
>After a few moments he regains his composure and look at you
>“Oh yeah, speaking about her paper, she was hoping to talk to you about the Buckball Curse that’s on the Prancers”
“Wait, what curse?”
>A teal hoof excitedly waves around 
>“Ooh Ooh, pick me, pick me!”
“Yeah, Lyra?”
>She puts her hoof down, looks up at you in glee and smiles wide before responding 
>”The Ponyville Prancers are cursed by infernal dark magic to never win a title. It’s called the Curse of Old Billy Goat” 
>It’s slightly unnerving to you that her happy tone didn’t drop when she was making her explanation 
>”A very very long time ago, back before I was even born, the Ponyville Buckball team used to be pretty good! We even had our own stadium too! There was a fan named Billy Goat who kept bringing his chickens to the games though. Eventually Everypony got sick of his chickens pecking at them so he got asked to leave them home. He got super angry and said that the Prancers wouldn’t win anymore. And they haven’t!”
>Mrs. Cake interjects
>”Bad luck follows the team wherever it goes. The wind sometimes blows the ball right into the hooves of an opponent and other times we’ll trip on nothing when we make a run for home base. There was even that one time a gateway to Tartarus opened in the field right in the middle of a qualifying match. Demons started swarming out trying to cuddle everypony without asking for permission. Princess Celestia had to swoop in and send them back with a firm talking to” 
>...
>...
>...
“Okay, well I’d say that our first meeting was a productive one, team. Good job everyone, I’m proud of you guys. Err, girls I should say. Girls and Spike”
>Your five players let out a collective joyful cheer 
>Fluttershy does more of a quiet supportive ‘yay’, but it’s the thought that counts 
>BobBon’s cheer wasn’t really that impressive either, her sour demeanor only putting up a halfhearted whoo 
>The five of them coalescent into a huddle, each of them raising a hoof into the center before they eye you curiously
>Mrs. Cake is the one to ask you the question
>”Are you going to join us in the team anthem, Anonymous?”
“Can’t say I know it” 
>”That’s alright, we can do it this time and you can join us when you think you memorized it!”
>They all turn towards each other now start to sing in harmony as their hooves and hand go down and further up together

>”Come on Prancers, show them what you got! 
>Show the other team we’re more than they thought!
>Bring home the trophy,
>Bring home the glory,
>Bring back the stories,
>Just don’t think you’re lonely! 
>Cause win or lose
>You won’t have the blues
>You’ll have your team,
>One shared dream
>And you’ll see,
>What friendship can be!”

>Yeah no, you’re not going to join in on that 
>The mayor said your chances of winning are slim
>She was understating just how dire they were 
>You have an incomplete roster, inexperienced teammates, and apparently a curse that was working against the Prancers 
>Oh and you don’t know what the rules are still
>With the final lyrics sung, your players raise their limbs tall and let out one last cheer as they wave their arms in the air 
>They don’t seem worried about their prospects at all and seeing them happy lightens your heart 
>You told the mayor that you were desperate to win, and you are
>But now you also don’t want to disappoint these elated little things 
>You sigh
>And start to wave your arms in the air with them, a small smile on your face