>You’re Pepe Anónimo
>You live in a small apartment on the 15th floor in Rafael Calzada
>This is a hot summer night
>It so hot, not even your big fan can make the air bearable in your room 
>Thankfully you’re alone
>At least you can be in underpants 
>Shitposting in /mlp/ is your only distraction
>For dinner, you’re eating an entire family sized mozzarella pizza with faina and beer
>Let’s see what’s new on the board
>Speaking about shitpost…
>Come on, this faggot must be new here
>You mean, Role play?
>Anonymous 04/0X/1X(Sat)01:19:14 No.44444438
>IMG_5477.jpg (Discord photo) Hi fellow bronies, Discord here. I’m going to take anyone who replies to this thread and gets the 44444444 post to Equestria. Go on and try your luck ;)
>...
>0 replies
>I’m bored, let’s try
>”Hi Discord, how’re you doing?”
>Here goes nothing
>Send
>Hmmm, I got the get
>Was fun at least

>Weird, the monitor makes a weird buzz noise
>Buzzing grows louder
>The screen’s glass start to crack slowly
>1 reply to your post
>Anonymous 04/0X/1X(Sat)01:16:21 No.44444449
> >.>44444444
>”Pretty good, congratulations Pepe”
>Wait what
>The PC goes off
>Fucking old piece of trash
>The fan stops for an instant and then starts to work again spinning backwards
>A small tornado comes out from the room center
>Suddenly an earthquake starts
>What the hell is going on!
>You run toward a table and duck under it
“HEEELP” you shout in terror
>”Do you need a hand?”
>That voice...
>The earthquake and the wind stops
>Slowly, you come out from under the table
>You readjust your vision
>You finally lost it
>So many years of hypnosis, tulpas, and waifuism led you to this
>Because there’s no way in front of you is the spirit of Chaos itself

>”Hey, can you please stop with your ‘intellectual’ internal monologue? Geez, humans are so rude sometimes. I give you a great and fantastic show and how do you thank me? They just stay there without saying a word. I mean, what happened? A cat got your tongue” He looks at his lion paw. “Oh sorry, is this yours?”
>Wait a second, where’s your tongue... Of course  in his paw, where else? “Oh sorry, here you have it” and he puts your tongue again into your mouth
>You start to spit out all the fur your tongue got in the draconequus paw
>”OK, before anything else, congratulations Pepe for being the winner of my contest. So, what would you like to be in the wonderful and amazing nation of Equestria?”
>You don’t say anything, you keep looking at him in disbelief
>”I see I see, you don’t want to--”
“Wait!” you shout at him

>A cocky smile grows in his face
“Ok, yes! I want to go”
>”Well, what species do you want to be?”
“I guess an alicorn is too much hehehe” you joke
>”That’s right, it requires too much magic to do it”
>This is a tough decision… for all I know about dragons, they are pretty douches like the griffons. And being a cute pony would be cool. But...what kind? Earth Pony? Nah, lame. Unicorn? That could be kinda cool, but the only ones which can make interesting things are the powerful and trained like Twilight or Starlight. A pegasus... Well, almost everyone in the show can fly and that’s an advantage. 
“Can I be a Pegasus?”
>”Yes, but you have to start like a young one however, you can choose if you want to be a filly or a colt”
>Let’s see, would be interesting to be a filly, but… in most of the stories about Anonfilly she doesn’t have a happy ending. Without to mention how much you love your dong.
“A colt…”
>”Alright, I’ll make some magic” and he snaps his talon

>A poof later, you feel your body different, you have a large barrier, a grip, a trigger… wait a second….

>That bastard!
>He just transformed you in a damn gun!
>In your range, you shoot all over the place
>Discord starts to laughs his ass off
>”But you told me you wanted to be a colt…” He gasps “Ah, do you mean a pegasus colt? Sorry” and he giggles
>He snaps his talon and in a second your body starts to change
“Bang bang bang bang… wait am I still a gun?”
>”You want to be one?” He says while he rubs his talon with a nail file
“No, no. Now this it’s okay…”
>You go to your bathroom to look at yourself in the mirror
>You look so cool
>Your coat is light blue and you have a green mane with three shades
>Wow, horse cock looks weird
>”If you already have had enough fun with your body, we shall go to Equestria my young and” he pinches your cheeks “adowable cowt”
>You take out his paw with your hoof “Ok, ok. But can I take some luggage?”
“Alright but quick, we don’t have much time”

>And you find your old handbag that you used years ago in the graduation trip to Bariloche. You put your old walkman, a 99999 in 1 brick game, some cassette tapes and a baseball bat, just in case.”
>You take a look at a portrait of your parents “Sorry I have to leave you, but a candy vag is a candy vag. OK, I’m ready”
>”Prepare yourself then” and he snaps his talon
>*poof*