>You are Anon >And you are a filly >And you are Anonfilly >And you don't know who you are anymore >Sure you're a little green earth pony who responds to being called Anon >But there are just so many memories, you don't even know which truly is yours >Many of them are conflicting even >Some you remember yourself being 40 years old >In others you're as low as 15 >You just- >"Anon, lunch is ready! Come eat." >And there's your only semblance of normality >As much of a normal thing as a Purple horse can be >Your body starts moving on its own as you make your way to the dining room >You have no idea what controls it, but it does whatever one of your many memories desires >It's never the same but its rarely (You) >Wait, stop >… >Oh hey, you managed to stop again, heh >And now it's back to moving by itself >It's one of the few things you fond to do for fun >But you have no idea what's going on >"There you are, thought I'd need to go get you again" >You hear her speak, but you don't respond as your body keeps staring at your hooves >"Is everything okay?" "Fuck you purple, REEEE-" >Immediately one hoof covers your mouth and another slaps the side of your face hard >All the while, one of your backhooves settles onto a sitting position and the other tries to lay down, making so you drop on your side >It's almost like it can't decide on what to do >You cower under your hooves while waiting for whatever punishment Twilight may give you >But like all other times nothing comes >Lowering your legs you see Twilight sitting by your side >You re not even trying to hide your crying anymore >"Oh Anon, what will I ever do with you" >You get up and hug her, laying your head on her purple chest fluff >It always manages to calm you down >In turn she lays a hoof on your back and begins stroking gently >"Shh, its alright, I'm here, I'm here…" >But as her wings comes to complete the hug, something deep from yourself forces you to push her away >Not missing a beat your body also bolts for the door >It's not long until you start slowing >Part wanting to get back to the hug, part wanting to get away from the 'monster' >Memories of Twilight being nice >Memories of her doing extremely evil things to you >And all of them conflicting together once more >And the fight for control begins anew >You're now slowly walking towards the door as a heavy weight drops on top of you >Not able to lift it you drop to the ground and start sobbing again >"There, I got her Twilight, she wont hit herself this time" >Something in you tries to move each hoof randomly >But the thing on top of you also got them pinned >'Rape' >Apparently some parts of your brain understood it immediately >Some others took a while longer >What are these feelings…? >What do they all mean? >After some time all of them, for once, agreed that it was time to cry >"Hey, don't cry, its for the best Anon, I swear" >"Thanks Starlight, I'm not sure if that really helps though" >"Just be quick, she seems to be hurting again" >"As long she can't hit herself again like she keeps doing" >"Don't worry, see? I got her down" "WAAAHH" >You totally aren't crying like a baby >What is happening to you? >"Just hold still Anon, this will be quick" >And Twilight began slowly shortening the distance from her brightly lit horn to your forehead >You just stared at it, scared >Not like you could've moved away >Seems like they will put you to sleep until tomorrow again >Like all the other times >Closing your eyes, a weird but familiar feeling courses through your body >It's not like you wanted to live a normal life anyway >The constant fight for your own body, while staying awake for a hour tops >Why are you even…. >You're still thinking? >You're awake? >Opening an eye, you come face to face with Twilight >"Hey there, how are you feeling today?" >You try moving a hoof >And it responds by scooting a little forwards >You didn't even notice the weight being lifted from you >Wait, your hoof… >IT RESPONDED >You also doesn't feel the constant fighting for control, like all the other times you woke up >You've assumed direct control for once >And you're so happy >You jump up and hug Twilight >You're so happy you're crying with joy >"I'm so sorry.." >You hear Twilight whisper, tears of her own falling on your back before a wing envelops you >"We really need to fix this sooner than later, should I call the girls again?" >"Yes, please do that, don't worry about Spike, I'll get him later Starlight" >"As you wish" >As the clip clop of hooves make way to the door you feel a soft nuzzling >You can't help but feel safe for once >"I'm so sorry Anon, I promise you that we will get this sorted soon" >It's then that you feel another touch on your head >"But just to be sure…" >And you're out like a candle >You wake up panicking >Not again, please you don't want to go back to the fighting >You're immediately get on a defending position on all fours >And looks like you interrupted something as 8 pairs of eyes are right on you >"See, it was a short one just so she couldn't flee again" >"The others will still wake up by tomorrow though, right?" >"Yea Applejack, I can't simply kill all the other personalities, it's not right" >"But can't you, like, just make a bunch of fake bodies and put them there?" >"Rainbow Dash! How would you feel if you were suddenly put in another body that isn't yours?" >"Eh, as long I was still just as awesome and could fly, I don't see the problem" >"Are you sure darling? I still remember how painful it was for you to take care of Fluttershy's animals, and that was just the cutie mark" >"I-I can deal with it, I-I'm awesome like that, right Pinkie?" >"I dunno, that was kind of a big deal for me…" >"Me too, ooh I can still remember how painful it was to try to make all those ponies laugh…" >You finally decide to turn off their talking >You're you, there's no fighting and you're still on control >Yet you're frozen still >What s going on? >Spike notices you start to panic and moves to your side >"Don't worry, it's just a safety spell so you wouldn't hit yourself when you woke up again" >You relax a bit at that, though still paralysed >"Also it should be fading our soon, how are you feeling?" >Oh, can you even talk? "Fine…I think?" >Oh, you can, nice >"Good, don't worry, they will find what's wrong with you and fix it in no time" >Then Spike turned around, trying to hide something >"…Just like the other hundreds attempts from before" "What was that?" >"Nothing nothing" >You hope you didn't hear what you think you did >But before you could ask he had already rushed to Twilight and was pulling her wing to get her attention again >"Oh, right, sorry Anon, we were just discussing, um, what's best to try today, yes that" >"What do you girls think about-" "BENIS" >You cover your mouth as quick as you can >Deep inside you may be laughing, but you actually feel more ashamed than giddy at that >Everyone lets out a groan as Starlight comes closer to the table >"Well, looks like a second one already woke up" >"So much for having an one on one chat" >"Cant you just extend their sleep?" >"Its not like that Rarity, I can't just pick a single of them to stay awake" >A very angry Rainbow Dash then flew right at your face and booped you before saying: >"Then put every one of them for a week long sleep or so, putting them out for a day hasn't helped at all" >"But how will I know that I did not overload her brain with magic? I could damage her permanently" >"Ah guess ya just gonna have to trust yourself this time Twi" >"This is no better than killing all but one Applejack" >"Ah mean, it still doesn't feel right, but it could help in the long run, and you wouldn't be downright killing them" >Slowly Twilight turned and made her way to the table >Gone was the calming face that you liked >Now it was like you were a mere insect looking to a almighty giant >Unable to do anything but wait as she looked down at your paralysed form >Not saying a word a magic lance shot from her horn straight at you >Being magically trapped meant that you had no way of dodging >It still managed to knock you out of the map table >The same buzzing from before met you once again, as darkness overrode your vision >You wake up not feeling anything >No matter how much you try to do anything your body doesn't answer >Yet you can hear a faint beep outside >There are many continuous noises, but it only beeps on top of you >It doesn't take long, as seconds later you can hear something tapping on glass just in front of you >Not able to move or do anything, you just decide take a long deep breath >Some more time pass, before you notice the liquid all around yourself start to flush >As the liquid pass below your hooves you feel your eyes be forced open by some magical force >In front of you is Twilight, and all around you there are an uncountable amount of green fillies in pods >Probably just like the one you were in >"If you understand me please look at my hoof" >She then proceeded to raise her hoof >Slowly you force your eye to it >It's so slow to move and focus...like you have no reflexes anymore >She moves her hoof right to left and left to right >But you can't hope to keep up with it, yet you attempt to >With a painful look she turns around and lets go of your eye >The lid just closes as she releases it, not being able to keep it open yourself >You can feel the pain on her voice as she starts documenting something >"Day 9, notes of filly #488" >She levitates your hoof and try to see your reactions >"She's alive but apparently only with basic operating functions, no limb control, maybe can be magically rewired" >You hear tapping on the pod you had just been >"Report shows that internal organs seem fine and breathing is normal, but they're fragile and can fail at any time" >You can feel her taking another look at you >"Her estimated chance of survivability over the week is…" >You don't want to die… >You eyes start watering on their own from the time she's taking to finish that last part of the note >You dont want to die… >You feel a hoof lightly touch your ribcage >"…her c-chance of survivability is…" >It's warm… >You can't think on anything but the warmth holding you now >Washing away the coldness you've been feeling all around >Like a torch in the middle of the freezing snow >*sigh* "…it's enough" >With that you're carried on her back somewhere else >She doesn't walk for long as you're carried to another table >You may still be on the same room but you already miss her warmth as she releases you >With another deep sight she starts doing some kind of procedure >Or she at least tries to, your sides are wet and more droplets keep falling in pairs >"Why am I even trying anymore, I-I can't see another one…I-I'm sorry" >You hear something metallic hit the table by your side >Twilight is rushing past the door, now openly crying >You just stand there >Unmoving >Alone >But alive >Minutes, hours goes past >Your sides are hurting a bit, but you can't move to alleviate it >So you just wait for someone to get back >It's some time until you hear the door creaking open once again >And in comes not the normal hoofsteps you'd expect >But much heavier ones from a much larger creature >You can almost feel it's overpowering magic from far away as it enters the room, closing the door behind itself >And you start to get scared as it decides to come closer >When it gets beside the table its almost like you're face to face with the sun itself >You feel like nothing as it just stands there >But then some magic starts meddling inside you >Feeling like it was distorting itself to mold and change your body in some areas >But just as it began, it left you >Then the presence itself disappeared >Confused, you lay there as the door opens again and somepony else enters >Light steps, almost like it didn't wanted to be here >”Anon, please talk to me, do anything, I cant bear this anymore” >"I don't want to see you suffer, not again" >The pain in her voice filled you with sorrow, and you once again tried to move yourself >All seemed to be pointless just like last time >”Get them to sleep for a week, they said” >You keep trying to move as she speaks >”It will be for the best, they said” >The way she's speaking almost gives you urgency on trying to move one of your incredibly heavy legs >Wait, heavy? >”Well, it's been too long and at least no filly is going to suffer because of me, not anymore!” >"Hear this? You are all free, no need to suffer in vats because of me I...I....I'm so sorry!" >You feel a pinch as something is forcefully pushed in your plot >And almost at the same time you manage to make your front leg twitch >”Anon!” – she shouts, removing the thing from your backside and dropping it >The same metalic sound from before rings beside you again >”Oh Anon, I can't believe- wait“ >Quickly she lifts your eyelid and asks you to follow her hoof again >You manage to do it much easier now >When she releases it you can even slow down its descent this time >As it closes you uncounciously focus on the object in front of you >It was a syringe with something inside >Was…was it the kind that took animals out of their misery? >Slowly but surely you start to curl up >Twilight mistakes it for you being cold, and levitates you towards her >”Its fine, you'll get better” >She holds you against her fluff like she used to weeks ago >”Everything will be just fine, my little ray of Sunshine…” >She then started writing more notes of this filly >Finally something had worked >And maybe, just maybe, she could still find a way save all the still sleeping fillies