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https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/30476125/#30499817
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>"What do you think, brother? Does it look good?"
>Everything on the table looks edible as far as you can tell.
"Yeah, sure."
>Your sister clears her throat, sitting over the dinner table.
>Picking up the fork, you notice her glaring at you, clearing her throat.
>"I'll say grace."
>Awkwardly putting the fork back, you clasp your hands, waiting for her to start.
>"Lord, thou who art in heaven, please bless our parents on the road, my friends from school..."
>She continues listing off a bunch of names for 'the lord' to bless, eyes closed.
>Your little sister has had some weird phases before, but this one really takes the cake.
>It started a couple of weeks ago with her insisting on calling you 'brother', apparently to be formal.
>Then she ditched her t-shirts and started wearing sweaters inside.
>That must be uncomfortably warm, but when asked, she just mumbled something about modesty.
>None of this made any sense until she started openly reciting bible verses and prayers in your face.
>The only welcome thing about this development is that she now cooks for you sometimes, for whatever reason.
>"...and bless the lettuce and the hands that pulled them from the ground. Ah-men."
"Ay-men."
>She clears her throat again, eyes drilling holes through your head.
"Uhh... ah-men."
>"Thank you."
>Apparently that's the historical pronunciation, or something.
>You chomp through the food, quietly impressed by her skill.
>As genuine as she seems, the length of this phase is starting to worry you.
>She doesn't hang out with her friends much anymore, instead engrossed in back-to-back bible readings.
>"So, brother, how about it? Will you go with me tomorrow..?"
"I'm not going to church, Shim."
>She looks at you as if you're a lost puppy.
>"Is that video game really more important than your soul..?"
"Well, it's a really good game."
>You ignore her look of disapproval, chomping on some more food.
"I actually think you'd like it, it's about reclaiming the holy land."
 
>"Thanks, brother, you're the best!"
>She gives you a quick Christian side-hug before running up the stairs and into her room.
>Who'd have thought she'd be so excited about a copy of Crusader Kings 2 as an early birthday present?
>You follow her into the room, figuring she's going to need some help.
"Alright, how's it going?"
>"This is... complicated."
"I'll give you a hint, start as an Irish duke."
>You spend the next couple of hours going over the basics with her, which she absorbs with ease.
>You quite enjoy the mentor role. What better feeling is there than being useful to someone who looks up to you?
>Looking at the screen, you notice her heir and his twin sister just came of age.
>Taking over the mouse and checking their profiles, you notice they're both geniuses.
"Whoa, lucky you. Check the marriage menu for others with a genius trait."
>She filters the list, showing no results.
>"It's empty... does that mean I can't have- I mean, my duke can't have genius babies?"
>She actually looks sad.
"Well... there is one thing you can do..."
>Her face lightens up.
>"Yes?"
"I mean... you can just marry your twins..."
>"Yeah, but to whom? The list was empty."
"To each other."
>A moment of silence passes, both of you looking away as you notice each other's blush.
>"Isn't that... bad..?"
"One time should be fine, just don't do it too often."
>"No, I mean... is that allowed, in the church?"
>Figures that's the angle she's worried about.
"Yeah, I guess. Royalty did this all the time in Europe."
>She doesn't look convinced.
"I'm pretty sure the Old Testament borderline endorses this kind of thing, too. You'd know better than me."
>A bulb seems to light above her head.
>"Woah, you're... right. It kinda does..."
 
>The next morning, the Sun wakes you up.
>Performing your usual waking-up routine, you notice your sister's Steam profile is active.
>Which means she didn't go to church this morning. Success!
>Deciding to check on her, you knock on her door.
"Shim, are you in there? How's it going?"
>The door opens, revealing your sister.
>Her hair is completely ragged, her eyes have bags under them, and she's wearing a t-shirt and no pants.
>"I did it, Anon... I mean broth-ugh, whatever."
>She waves you inside, pointing to the screen, looking triumphant.
>"Look!"
>Well, you'll be god-damned. Not only did she get the Jerusalem title, but she also formed Britannia.
>"Those Muslims didn't know what hit them."
"Did you stay up all night?"
>Seeing her falling down on her bed answers your question.
>Noticing her king's three chins, you check his profile, revealing the most horrific monstrosity you've ever seen produced by this game.
>A weak, inbred imbecile, ugly and clubfooted, and infirm on top of that. An impressive cocktail of negative traits to say the least.
>His parents are siblings. As are his grandparents. And great-grandparents. This entire family tree is just a ladder.
"Shim... how in the f-"
>She wraps her arms around you from behind, dropping her head on your shoulder.
>"Can I ask you something..?"
>Damn it, her face is way too close.
"S-sure..."
>"Will you be my husband?"
>Your hands go limp as you sit back into the chair, giving your little sister a raised eyebrow.
"You need to go to sleep."
>"N-no, I-" A yawn cuts her off. "I don't!"
"Okay, well, I should, uhh... get going..."
>Your words trail off as your sister begins tracing patterns on your chest instead of releasing you from the hug.
>"You know, I think we have some matching traits..."
"What's gotten into you..? Do you have a fever?"
>You reach for her forehead, feeling her warm, smooth skin against your palm.
>"See? I'm fine."
 
>"So will you do it?"
>She sits back on the bed, fluttering her eyes at you.
>"Please?"
>What monster have you created?
"N-nobody will marry us, Shim."
>"I'll do it."
"You'll... marry us? Does that even work?"
>"Anything is possible when God wills it, Anon."
"How do you even know that?"
>She pats the bed beside her, summoning you by her side.
>She jumps on you and sits on your lap, arms around your shoulders.
>"I'm sure of it. The Lord sent me the signs using this game, and it's telling me that you are the one."
>That's some quality Christian logic right there.
>You're done arguing. You know she's too stubborn to have her mind changed, and you've been dreading the day she gets a boyfriend anyways.
"Fine... if you insist."
>That's a one-way ticket to hell guaranteed, but the overjoyed look on her face makes it all worth it.
>"A-alright!" She springs onto her feet, dragging you with her.
>She hands you a piece of paper, looking excited.
>"Recite this."
>Looking at the words written, an entire leg's worth of blood rushes into your face.
>You're supposed to say *this* to your sister..?
>Looking up at her, she's waiting for you to start.
"Uhh... I, Anonymous take you... Sunset Shimmer, t-to be my... w-wife..."
>You gulp, hand covering your face in shame. It only gets worse from here, but it's too late to back out.
"I p-promise to be true to you in good times and in bad..."
>Looking up, she's drawing circles on the floor with her foot.
"...in s-sickness and in health..."
>Your eyes meet, the awkward contact breaking immediately as your eyes go back to the paper.
"I will... loveyouandhonouryouallthedaysofmylife, DONE."
>You hear a giggle as you catch your breath, the vow finally done with.
>"Alright, my turn."
>She takes a deep breath and recites the entire pledge in a single exhalation, not skipping or mincing a single word.
>Ignoring your speechlessness, her eyes close and her hands move behind her back, puffing out her chest.
>"You may kiss the bride..."
 
>How the hell did it come to this?
>You just wanted a sister you could play video games with, instead of that absurdly devout nun.
>On her toes and arching up her chin, your sister is standing as tall as she possibly can.
>It seems to have worked, but this... this was beyond your expectations.
>Sure, she's cute, but this is your little sister, not some cheap skank off the streets.
>This is the adorable fire-headed little girl who always insisted that the only place she could hide from thunderstorms was in your arms.
>Or she was, at least.
"Is this really necessary..?"
>"This is part of the ceremony, Anon. You're a man, aren't you?"
>Her eyes still closed, she looks like she's losing her balance.
>Not amused by the implication, you grab her be the shoulders somewhat roughly, eliciting a surprised jolt.
"F-fine."
>This is totally normal in France, right? What's the difference between a kiss on the cheeks and the lips, really?
"I can't do this with your mouth closed, you know."
>"Heh, right..."
>Her mouth hanging open, you throw caution to the wind and ram your tongue into her orifice.
>Closing your own eyes as you probe around, your image of your surroundings changes.
>Suddenly you see a big, decorated podium, and a beautiful young woman in a frilly, white dress in front of you.
>Your heart falters, shocked by the vividness of the fantasy.
>Is this divine intervention? Is 'God' showing you the way?
>Breaking the kiss, you submit to a sudden urge to wrap your arms around her back.
>"A-anon?"
"What?"
>"There's... one more thing."
>Dragging her panties down to her knees, she backs up against the wall behind her, dragging you along.
>"Consummation. Now."
"What? Is that even still a thing?"
>"Yeah, the pope can nullify our marriage if we don't."
>Putting aside her blatantly absurd concern, you drop your pants on the floor and kick them away.
"Okay... stay still."
>Moving your hands up under her shirt, you hold her against the wall by her sides.
 
>"Pfft... that tickles."
>Getting your aim right, you figure you should give her some kind of warning before doing the deed.
>You're not some kind of savage, after all.
"D-DEUS VULT!"
>Jamming your erection into her holy land, the first crusade against your sister's virginity is a resounding success.
>You make out a mumbled plea to continue, following her initial yelp and the sound of her head banging the wall behind her.
>Pulling almost all the way out, you commence the second crusade and then the third in quick succession.
>"Ahh... m-more-"
>Every sound from her lips eggs you on further, chipping away at your self-control.
>Your restraints now completely gone, you move a hand further up her shirt and find your fingertips in unobstructed contact with a perked nipple.
>Your arousal peaking, you thrust another two centuries' worth of papal war declarations inside your sister in a matter of seconds.
>"Y-yes... unf~"
>Seeing her tongue peeking at the outside world, you enter her mouth in for a second taste, all the while continuing your holiest of duties.
>Soon feeling your sister starting to slide down the wall, your arms wrap around her to keep her upright.
>"Ahh... alm-ahhh... almost..."
>Unleashing your final series of thrusts, you suppress a groan as your mission ends with three spurts of your goo, the final one landing outside as you pull out.
>Your sister, meanwhile, makes no attempt to muffle her satisfaction, loudly moaning your name while failing to stand under her own weight.
>Also debilitated by the wave of euphoria, you simply fall down on the floor with her.
>Breathing heavily with your sister in your arms, you notice her resting a little too peacefully.
>You almost forgot she didn't get any sleep tonight.
>Standing up, you pick her up and lay her down on the bed, careful not to rouse her.
>Signing the cross on your chest for the first time in years, you exit the room, a true believer once more.
 
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fin