Anonymous 02/10/22(Thu)17:30:15 No.38199546

"That's it. I'm sick of you two bumming around my shop!"
>You grab some spare change and your trusty broom.
>The reactions are immediate.
>One of the loiterers, the very ones dozing off on the floor of your shop, balks.
>The other, tenses up and clenches his jaw, seemingly poised to fight.
>Most ponies would be unnerved and let the issue be.
>Luckily you have enough experience with monsters to know not to give the human any leeway.
>"But it's warm in here, Bonnie."
>"Yeah, Bon. Those retarded bird niggers made it snow again."
>Maybe he did, what with all the tribalist remarks he always says.
>”Yeah! Dumb cloud trotters.” Lyra giggles, nudging his shoulder with a hoof.
>And he’s got Lyra saying them too!
>Tail lashing and nostrils flared, you tap the two trouble makers with the broom.
>Lyra rears, and is smart enough to step back.
>The human raises to nearly his full height, only stopped by the pony sized ceiling, and crosses his arms.
>A sign of defiance.
>One that quickly disappears when you jerk your neck to the side, the broom swatting the back of his knee.
>"Sh-shit! Alright. You win, fucking grump." he growls, trying to find his balance.
>Spitting out your weapon, you toss him a sack of bits.
"Why don't you quit veering around the rooster, and take Lyra on a date. You've been fidgeting all morning about it."
>"Wha- No I haven't."
>"You kinda were, Anon."

 Anonymous 02/10/22(Thu)17:31:20 No.38199551

>Huhh, she knew?
"Now go on," you say, nudging the big human out of the shop, "And the next time you snatch some peppermints, I'm going to bite!"
>A stamp punctuates your point.
>The human grumbles, but he doesn't snap back.
>Lyra nuzzles the side of your withers with a quiet nicker, before following him.
>Your ears sag a bit.
>This mare is too sweet for her own-
>The human fastens a harness on Lyra, before sitting in a red sled behind her and tapping her side with the reins to make her trot.
>He’s… making his date haul his lazy rump around.
>...
>It’s out of your hooves now.
>Turns out, to get the human out of the round pin, you needed to give it to him straight.
>Last week the flower sisters and you tried to sell him white roses to give to Lyra.
>Out of all the weird convoluted human courtship rituals, that one was one that was similar.
>He was left a stuttering mess and walked away.
>The week before that, you sprayed him with a hose hoping he'd roll in the dirt next to Lyra to get the water off.
>A bit forward, but it'd get the point across!
>You learned that human winter clothes are water resistant and it rolled off him like a duck.
>It wasn’t long ago, Anon was new in town and you were chewing him out for leaning his head on Lyra before the 8th date.
>And they were far from dating then!
>A buck shuts the door.
>Next time you think you’ll leave matters of the heart to Princess Cadence.

 Anonymous 02/22/22(Tue)10:09:36 No.38255734

>>38199551 
>A pleasant warmth spreads as your heart rate picks up, the harness pressing around your form.
>You are Lyra Heartstrings.
>A mare pulling a sled and, by extension, a hot date around.
>Apparently Anon's po- people still do this to equines, evident by his blissful smile.
>Not too dissimilar to what your tribe did to the others some centuries ago.
>You pick up the pace to a brisk trot when the reins tap at your hind legs.
>Said hot date, Anon, reminds you of when you first moved to Ponyville.
>If it weren't for Bonnie you'd have probably gotten mugged or something.
>Once or twice, you've even been mistaken for a rock.
>...If you're honest, you're still in the dark about that one.
>On top of that, humans seem to be less observant of things around them, and hyper focus on others.
>Even simple concepts render themselves abstruse.
>What with his forward facing predatory eyes, he probably doesn't even realize you can see him when you turn your head just a hair.
>Still, even when there's a lot of things he doesn't get, whether it's culture or biology, you seem to be at the forefront of his mind.
>It warms you to your snowpitty.
>"Hey, Lye?"
"Hmm?" you say with a small nicker, turning your head a little more so he knows you're looking at him, ears following not a moment later.
>"What do ponies like to do on dates anyways?"

 Anonymous 02/22/22(Tue)10:11:43 No.38255743

>>38255734 
"You know, hang out with friends or family and go do things together as a group. Picnics seem to be popular here."
>His eyes widen as if something clicked behind them.
>"Where I'm from it's usually just a one-on-one thing."
>Weird. How do you know if your coltfriend will get along with your family and friends that way?
>...Wait, you two have been hanging around a whole bunch since you became friends.
>Were you human dating the whole time without realizing it?
>If he wasn't pink to the tips of his cute rounded ears and sitting stiff as a board only today, you'd believe it.
>He runs a hand through his mane.
>"Should we be cal- uhh, sending out letters or something?"
"A bit short notice, don't you think?"
>"Sorry, Lye. I can go back and drag Bon out of her store or something."
>You giggle at the mental image.
"It's alright, Anon. How about we do things your way this time? Could be fun."
>His smile reaches his eyes.
>"Sure thing, Lye."