>Be Anon in ponyland
>Need to make a living somehow
>Find a job opening for home care services
>Miraculously you are hired with only a quick informal interview
>You were advised that most of the patients are elderly or disabled
>Of course you are assigned the retarded pony to take care of
>You are required to go to her house and help clean, prepare her meals, and generally make sure she is doing okay

>Fast forward 6 months
>It's been a real struggle and you aren't sure if this is the job for you
>This pony is constantly banging into everything around the house and not a day goes by without her making a mess or breaking something
>And to make matters worse she constantly follows you around and bugs you during the entire shift
>one day for lunch you cooked her pasta
>She's really excited and runs out of the kitchen and into the living room, plate in her mouth
>she trips and falls getting the pasta all over the carpet and herself
>At this point you've had it, you told her a million times not to run with food. Well, not to run at all actually
>She does her typical crybaby routine which you are also tired of
>You yell at her to go get washed 
>As you are cleaning up the mess you get a great idea which elicits a twisted grin
>After you finish cleaning you order Derpy to stay in her room until you get back. You tell her you are going to buy a muffin so she is quite happy and agrees to stay put
>You leave her house and buy a muffin at the Cake's shop then make your way back to your place which isn't far
>You keep your dog, Max, in a cage while you work your home care shift
>You tell Max that today he can chew on the couch, you have bigger fish to fry
>You also grab a small padlock you have laying around and put it in your pocket
>With cage and muffin in hand you make your way back to Derpy's house

>Looks like she actually listened for once
>Well, until she heard you come back in the house
>She rushes over to you with her big goofy smile
>"Anon! Muffin?
>She looks up expectantly at you
>When you first started this job you thought she was actually cute, in a disabled pony kind of way. But now her mere presence irritates you
"Derpy I have the muffin but I will only give it to you if you be a good pony for me, okay?"
>She looks confused, but that's nothing new
>You bring the cage into the kitchen and open the door
>Derpy trails behind you
>"What's that Anon?
"Derpy, get inside of here and then I'll give you the muffin"
>She sticks her head inside and looks around, eyes looming in random directions
>"Why?"
>She's definitely trying your patience, you are going to enjoy this
"Do you want the damn muffin or not?"
>Sensing your anger she puts her head down and walks into the cage
>"Okay.."
>Max is a decent sized dog but not quite the size of a pony
>Derpy has to hunch down to squeeze inside
>You close the door behind her and apply the lock
>A large smile spreads across your face
"Alright Derpy, here's the muffin"
>You take the muffin out of the bag and place it on the table, which is directly in front of the cage
>Her eyes go wide at the sight
>You bend down and take a nice whiff of the muffin
"Wow this smells amazing. One freshly baked extra large blueberry, you are one lucky pony"
>And with that you walk to the front door
>"Anon ..Muffin!!"
>Derpy rattles the cage door as she calls out to you
>You ignore her and leave the house, locking the front door
>With a satisfied grin you walk home