Originally uploaded to Pastebin: September 9th, 2013
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>"Alright, Scootaloo! This plan is gonna be perfect!"
>You are Scootaloo. 
>Loyalest of Rainbow Dash fans. personal aide to Rainbow Dash, president of the Rainbow Dash club and patent owner of the Rambo Dash action figure.
>You are currently watching your idol, the illustrious and impeccable Rainbow Dash, about to drop a sack of flour on a passer by.
>The pony in question isn't so much a pony as it is an unusually sophisticated alien chimp from another dimension named Anonymous.
>According to Sweetie Belle, being called "Anonymous" is an oxymoron.
>You didn't know what that meant, so you instead giggled at the word "moron"
>You're not quite keen on him, as he gives you the creeps with his long arms and charming accent.
>Glance back at Rainbow Dash, who is grinning madly as she balances the heavy sack precariously off the edge of the cloud you're both sat on.
"Rainbow Dash?"
>"Yeah, kiddo?"
"You still have that string attached to the sack wrapped around your hoof."
>"Of course! It's to stop it from hitting the ground if it falls off prematurely, allowing me to catch it, dummy!."
>She winks at you.
"But... Don't you want it to--"
>"Shh sh sh! He's getting closer! This is gonna be awwwesome!"
>Rainbow Dash squints and you sigh.
>The human below has his hands in his pockets, and is whistling a merry tune, as he often does.
>As he walks under the cloud, Rainbow Dash squeals.
>"Here we go!"
>She pushes the flour off the cloud.
>It plummets to the ground.
>You don't bother moving from your position.
>Instead, you watch with a lazy expression as Rainbow Dash is torn from her seat by the sack of flour, the string around her hoof tugging her down.
>With a thud and a pomf, she and the flour collide with the dirt path.
>Right behind Anon.
>He stops whistling and turns around, bewilderment clear on his face.
>"What the fuck?"
>Anon takes a while to take in the sight, before he throws his head back and laughs as hard as he can.
>Rainbow folds her front legs and glares at him.
>"It's not funny..."
>The human composes himself.
>"Actually, it's hilarious. What the hell are you doing?"
>Rainbow blinks.
>"I uhh... I was testing this flour for Pinkie!"
>She puts on her best, if not fakest looking smile, whilst trying to suppress the immense pain she's currently enduring.
>"Yyyup! Testing this flour for... Terminal... Uhh, velocity. I hear it's affecting lots of flour these days. Can't be too careful, ya know?"
>Anonymous furrows his brow.
>"Terminal velocity... Right."
>Rainbow grins at him.
>"Oh yeah! It's like terminal cancer, but faster!"
>He stares at her.
>"Now you're getting it! So, it's pretty hot, huh? Doing all this scientific testing?"
>"You dropped flour off a cloud."
>"Pshh, that's just as science-tific as what Twilight does!"
>"Twilight is studying arcane harmonics, you goddamn..."
>You watch the two bicker from your place on the cloud.
>Flying down would normally be the best option so that you can pull Rainbow Dash away from this scene before it gets worse.
>Problem with that is that you can't actually fly. And kinda need Rainbow to carry you everywhere.
>You enjoy her company more than anything, since she's like a big sister to you. But you can't help but worry about her somewhat unhealthy obsession with the local extraterrestrial.
>How she keeps roping you into helping her get Anon, you'll never know. But you love helping her out in general, and want to see her happy. 
>Especially since she's always going on about him, and how she'll "get that sexy slowpoke if it's the last thing I'll do!"
>Peer over the edge of the cloud.
>"I'm just saying, Anon! If you ever need me to drop you off a cloud, just ask! I'll even wear my gym shorts... You know, if you're into that kinda thing. I know I am. Into that kinda thing, that is. The gym sho--"
>"Stop talking, Rainbow Dash."
>"R-right."
>Sigh.
>She's hopeless.
>Might as well wrap this up.
"Hey, Rainbow Dash!"
>The pair of them peer at the cloud, and the small orangey-purple blob looking at them.
>Anon waves at you, a cheerful look on his face.
>"Hi, Scootaloo! Nice to see you!"
"Y-you too. So, uhh, Rainbow? Are we gonna go or what?"
>Rainbow Dash tries to seem cool. She -is- cool, but she was acting substantially less cool at the moment.
>"Uh- yeah! Let's go, Scoots!"
>She launches herself at the cloud you're sat on, grabbing you in her hooves and holding you against her chest as she flies home.
>Anon scratches his head and watches you both go.
>"Fucking Pegasi."

"All I'm saying is that we need to be smarter!"
>Rainbow huffs.
>"Smarter? Why do we need to be smarter? Anon isn't that smart! I'm way more smart than he is!"
>Groan.
>You're both in Rainbow Dash's room back at her house. You're sat on her bed while Rainbow paces up and down impatiently.
"Raaainbooow! I mean that instead of dropping sacks of flour on his head, or... What did we do last week again?"
>Rainbow puffs out her chest in pride.
>"We replaced everything in his house with pictures of me, of course!"
"Right. And how many bits did that set you back?"
>"...Not that many..."
"Rainbow Dash."
>"...The frames were really nice..."
>A flat look crosses your face.
>"A hundred and ninety bits. But it's okay! We put like, fifty nine frames in his house and I only counted fifty eight in his trash the next day!"
"Why were you rooting through his--"
>"Look, squirt. We need a plan and fast. I'm getting pretty antsy, you know? I haven't gotten laid in like, fore--... Oh..."
>You're blushing intensely.
>"Sorry, I forgot you don't like it when I talk like that. But you know what I mean, right? I need to get with Anon fast before I uhh. Explode, or something."
>She trots over and sits down on the bed, patting you on the back.
>"Still not much luck with that Rumble kid then?"
"Huh? Wha? I don't like Rumble!"
>"You don't? Huh. Well who -do- you like then?"
>Bury your face in the duvet beneath you and groan again.
>Rainbow sympathetically rubs your mane.
>"There there, kiddo. I remember when I was a virgin as well."
>Oh god not again.
>"So it was back in high school, ya know? I used to be such a dork. Suppose it came with hanging around with Fluttershy ever since we became friends at flight camp... I don't mean to badmouth her at all, but all that roleplaying game stuff she was into at the time kinda rubbed off on me."
>Press your face deeper into the covers, trying to block out the story you've heard a hundred times.
>Though it fills you with embarrassment to hear her talk about it, she's recited the story of her losing her virginity so much you could probably re-enact it out as a sort of X-rated school play, where you play all the parts.
>"...And so I decided that I was just gonna go for it. I walked up to Gale Force and said "Hey! I'm young, horny, and full of alcohol!"
>She sighs happily.
>"The rest is history..."
>Rainbow is silent for a moment.
>"Wait, what was I talking about?"
"Mmmph mmph mphhmph."
>"Huh?"
>Lift your head up.
"I said we were planning out how you're going to get Anon."
>"Oh yeah! So I had this awesome plan. But it involves some serious work on our part."
>She hops off the bed.
>"So! We both know that the hotness that is Anon likes to take morning jogs around Ponyville park, right?"
"Yeah?"
>"What if we were to... Plant a trap for him?"
>Nod slowly.
"All... Right?"
>"So Anon, being the big dummy he is, will be running along, dressed up in his dumb looking athletic kit, you know the one, the one where his shorts are small enough to show off those thick muscular legs and his shirt is drenched in sweat so you can see his toned chest through it-ohmygosh yes..."
>Sigh and rest your face on a hoof, waiting for her to get to the point.
>"Umm... Look, we're gonna dig a big hole then cover it in twigs. 'Kay?"
"'Kay."
>"Cool."

>You wheeze as you drag yourself out of the pit.
>It's about 6:00 in the morning, and you have just finished digging a huge pit in the middle of a path.
>Pretty sure this is illegal, but Rainbow "Danger" Dash cares little for the rules of society.
>Lie on your back and stare at the sky for a moment, the sun is creeping over the valley, and the air is cool, but not cold.
"Fuh... Finished!"
>Rainbow snorts and falls out a tree, her pillow and blanket following her.
>Wince as she hits the floor with a thud.
>Perhaps her 'awesomeness' and the constant blows to her head are correlated?
>Shake your head.
>Nah. That can't be.
>Climb to your feet and give your idol a weary smile.
>She looks over at the pit, then back at you.
>Then pulls you into a hug, squeezing you.
>"It's perfect, Scoots. Keep digging pits this big and your muscles will be as big as mine someday!"
>Sigh happily into her chest.
>She may not be as smart as Twilight, but she cares.
>Rainbow lets go of you.
>"Okay, I'll go gather us some twigs and stuff, you cover the pit, okay?"
"Got it!"
>The pony disappears in a blur of cyan, leaving a faint rainbow trail behind her.
>Take a moment to inspect the floor while she's gone.
>These pebbles sure look ni--
>"I'm back!"
>Look up.
>Rainbow is panting, beads of sweat covering her brow, yet still managing to show off a confident grin.
>She unloads a huge amount of twigs and leaves she was carrying on her back.
>The two of you hastily prepare the trap before ducking into a bush.
"Are you sure he'll fall into it? I mean, it's not exactly... Hidden."
>"What are you talking about? Of course it's hidden! Look at all those leaves!"
>You look at the large pile of twigs and leaves in the middle of the dirt path.
>It sticks out like a sore hoof.
>But Rainbow seems convinced that it would work, and you don't want to be a buzz-kill.
>"Anon should be heading down this way any second now, I can feel it."

>30 minutes later.

>Someone nudges you in the ribs.
>You snort and wake up, shaking your head.
"Wha? Who? Did we g--"
>A huge yawn interrupts you mid-speech.
>Rub your eyes and blink a few times.
"Did we get him?"
>"Nah. You just fell asleep."
"Oh..."
>The pair of you watch the path for a little while longer.
>You can feel yourself slipping away again in the tranquillity of dawn.
>Only the sounds of the few early birds can be heard twittering away in the trees nearby.
>Rest your head against Rainbow as you feel sleep begin to take you once more.
>The pony lifts up a wing and pulls you closer to her, the wing acting like a blanket.
>"Scootaloo?"
>Nestle further into her warm coat.
"Mmmm... Yeah?"
>Rainbow doesn't take her eyes off the path while she talks.
>"You don't have to do this, you know."
>Move your head up slightly to look at her unusually stoic visage
>Her normal cocky demeanour has been replaced with a much more relaxed, yet still unreadable expression.
"What do you mean?"
>"All this. Helping me get Anon. You don't have to do it, you know. I can do it myself."
>She senses your discomfort at these words and squeezes you with her wing re-assuredly.
>"I'm not saying I don't like having you around, Scoots. But it's just that you stayed up all night to help me dig a big pit. As well as other dumb stuff in the past. I feel like I'm becoming a bad influence on you, is all."
>You're now wide awake and struggling to find words to say to your idol.
>She breaks her gaze from the path and looks directly at you, leaning in and nuzzling you lovingly.
>"You're like family to me, kid. But I don't want to keep you away from stuff you want to do. Like that stuff with your friends you used to do. You haven't seen them in a while because of me, have you?"
"...Y-yeah, but I like helping out, Rainbow!"
>She gives a tired smile, the effects of the long night becoming apparent.
>"I know. But I can look after myself. It's you I'm worried about."
>You sigh and look down at the grass.
>"You can go home if you want. You're literally falling asleep on me here. ...Heh, I'm not -that- dull, am I?"
"W-what? No! Of cour--"
>"Relax, Scoots. I'm just joshing you."
>She returns to looking at the path.
>"I don't think he's coming. Strange, he usually comes around this time of morning."
>A sad look overtakes her normally chipper attitude, and she turns back to you.
>"I'm sorry for keeping you up all night for nothing, kid."
"It's okay. It was fun all the same... It was a pretty cool hole, right?"
>She chuckles.
>"Hey yeah, I suppose it--"
>"GAH, FUCK!"
>Rainbow's wings go fully erect and her face lights up like a hearths warming tree.
>She bursts out of the bushes.
>"GOTCHA!"
>"WHAT THE FUCK, RAINBOW DASH?!"
>You're stunned.
>This thing actually worked?
>How?
>Why?
>...
>How?!
>Emerging from the bush, you trot over to the pit, where a very angry looking Anonymous glares up at you.
>Rainbow Dash is prancing around the pit, flaunting her victory.
>"Weeeee gooot Aaaaanooon! Weeeee gooot Aaaaanooon!"
>"When I get out of this pit, I'm going to break you, Rainbow."
>"Pssh, yeah right! You're all the way down there, and we're up here! Now you HAVE to date me!"
>"Rainbow Dash, how the living fuck is this supposed to get me to like you?"
>"I dunno. Don't all guys like it rough?"
>You blush.
>Rainbow catches it and mouths the word "Sorry" at you.
>"So, Anon. Where do you wanna go? There's a Wonderbolts show at Canterlot we could go to! And after that we could maybe rent a hotel room and fu--"
>"GOD DAMMIT, PRISMATIC LESBIAN, I'M NOT HAVING SEX WITH YOU, NOR AM I DATING YOU!"
>Rainbow makes herself comfortable and rests her head on the edge of the pit.
>"Then I guess you're stuck in there until you accept my offer, hot stuff."
>"The only reason I haven't climbed out and kicked your ass yet is because I sprained my ankle when I fell down here."
>"Yeah right, I've heard that excuse a hundred times. 'Oooh! I can't go, Rainbow! I've sprained my ankle!'"
>"Horses don't have ankles."
>"Yeah they do!"
>"Don't."
>"Do!"
>"DON'T."
>"DO!"
>Your head moves back and forth between the two.
>Yawn again and settle down like Rainbow Dash, preparing yourself for another argument between them.
>They usually last 15 minutes, ending with Anonymous outsmarting Rainbow.
>"Nope, fuck this, I'm climbing out."
>"You can't do that! You have a sprained ankle!"
>"I'd rather do more damage to it than endure more of your so-called 'logic'."
>"My logic is perfectly sound! Look, ponies have ankles, see?"
>She sticks her leg in the pit.
>Big mistake.
>A long arm shoots up and grabs her hoof.
>Rainbow gives you a shocked "Oh crap." look before she's dragged screaming into the pit with the enraged human.
>You cover your eyes while the wails of the pegasus fill your ears, drowning out the endless stream of curses and shouts from Anon.

"You feeling okay?"
>It's the middle of the afternoon, and you're sat next to Rainbow Dash, who is covered from head to tail in bandages
>"H-heh... D-don't worry, kid. It's... Not the first time... I've been completely covered in white stuff..."
>You cock your head
"You mean the flour?"
>"Uhh, y-yeah. Sure."
>The door at the end of the room opens, and Doctor Handsome walks in.
>That's actually his name. You didn't believe it the first time either.
>He stops at the end of the bed and checks his clipboard, scribbling a few things down with the quill in his aura.
>"Hello, Rainbow Dash. Are you feeling any better?"
>"Hey there, H-handsome... Not bad, I guess. How long till I'm out of here? I have things to do..."
>The doctor shakes his head.
>"Well unlike last time, you have more than a broken wing. Every single bone in your body is broken in increasingly more comedic ways. In fact, your spine is actually where your pelvis should be."
>"Kinky."
>He rolls his eyes.
>"Given the intense nature of the damage, and the sheer amount of internal organ trauma... I'd say you'll be in here for at least a week."
>"Oh come on! A whole week!?"
>"I'm afraid so."
>Rainbow groans, then winces.
>The doctor nods at her, then at you.
>"You're free to stay here as long as you like, miss."
"Okay."
>He heads towards the door, before stopping and looking over his shoulder
>"Oh, and Rainbow Dash?"
>A "yeah?" comes from within the mass of bandages.
>"Try not to steal any books or slippers this time."
>He smirks and walks out.
>You're not sure what he meant, but you can almost hear Rainbow seething from within her gauze tomb.
>After a moment, she sighs.
>"Hey... Scoot?"
"Yeah? What's up?"
>"Thanks for getting me here."
"S-sorry..."
>"What? No, I didn't mean that all sarcastic like. I meant thanks. Really."
>Feel your face flushing again.
"It was nothing, really."
>"..."
"..."
>"Hey, Scoots?"
"Yeah?"
>"When I get out of here, I wanna try out this new plan. This one is -definitely- gonna work!"
"OH COME ON!"

>"So I was thinkin', if you're up for it, that is..."
>Rainbow proudly strolls out of the hospital doors one week late. Flapping her wings a few times to check if they're okay to use.
>Happy with their condition, she starts hovering, turning to give the hospital a rude gesture as she floats away.
>"There's this carnival on in a day or two, right? And I was thinking that since Anon can't fly, we can trap him on one of the ferris wheel cars!"
"That's great!... I think! But, how are you gonna convince Anon to get into one of those with you?"
>"Oh that's easy. We'll bait him!"
"With... What?"
>Rainbow grins at you.
>It worries you immensely.
>She drifts on over to your side and drapes a hoof over your shoulder.
>Normally you wouldn't mind, but you have a feeling you know where this is going.
>"So Anon likes you, right? He doesn't mind having you around..."
"Well yeah, but he gives me the creeps!"
>"Why's that?"
"He's all, well, alien. And stuff."
>"Aww, come on Scoots! He's fine!... Well, more than fine, actually."
>She turns her head away from you and seems to glare at the area in Ponyville where the carnival is being set up, ready for the big night.
>"God, the things I'd do to that ass..."
"What?"
>She clears her throat and turns her attention back to you.
>"Nothing. I just think you should ask him to ride with you in the ferris wheel! It'll be fun for you, since you like ferris wheels, and fun for him because he gets a piece of me!"
"Woah! Hold on! You're not actually planning to... Um."
>Your face goes the colour of tomatoes
"W-with me in, like, um. Th-the car too?"
>Rainbow taps her chin
>"Hmm. Never thought about that."
>She ponders for a second.
>"Eh, it'll be educational for you. What's the harm, right?"
"I-I-I d-don't--"
>You stop stammering and go silent for a second.
>Something Rainbow said just registered with you.
"Wait, Rainbow?"
>The pair of you stop walking and the blue pony turns to you, still smirking.
>She raises an eyebrow, motioning for you to continue.
"When did I tell you I liked ferris wheels? There hasn't been a carnival in Ponyville for years!"
>"Hm? Oh, you told me four years ago when we'd just met. You kinda mumbled it, but I still heard it."
>Four years ago... 
>That was when you'd talked to Rainbow for the first time.
>You weren't even friends. You had been watching her for ages and had finally worked up the nerve to say hi
>She didn't seem to be paying attention at the time, so you just muttered a few words and left as fast as you could.
>"Scoots? You okay?"
>Look up at her nervously.
>The pegasus affectionately smiles down at you.
"You... Remembered that?"
>"Of course I remembered, ya little dummy."
"But, that was so long ago!"
>"So? Why would I forget?"
"Because you weren't paying any attention!"
>Rainbow frowns.
>"Scoots, I always pay attention to you. Even when it seems like I don't. So are you in with the plan or not?"
>Your heart swells at her words.
>Rainbow is looking away, at the carnival.
"Y-yes! I'll do it!"
>You compose yourself and beam at her.
>She looks back to you with a grin of her own.
>"Great!"
>Rainbow rubs her hooves together in a mischievous manner.
>"Let's go plan my first date with Anon."
>She lets out a menacing chuckle for good measure.
>It's the night of the carnival.
>Ponyville is alive with the sound of music.
>As well as ponies shouting, laughing and playing hilariously overpriced games.
>You are perched on a rooftop with Rainbow Dash.
>Her wing is absent-mindedly secured over you, preventing you from falling off.
>You still can't quite get the hang of flying.
>Watching the ponies frolic around with various treats and drinks sure makes you hungry, though.
>Glancing up at Rainbow Dash, she appears to be staying ever vigilant for signs of her object of desire.
>She narrows her eyes, the shroud of night making it hard to see far, even in the glow of a thousand lights that illuminate the small town.
>"I think... I think I see him over there near the food court. Let's roll, Scoots."
>Before you can reply, she sweeps you under her chest and holds you close, taking off towards the unwitting human, gliding silently so as to maintain the element of surprise.
>Landing on another building, you can clearly see Anon directly below you, walking around with his hands in his pockets and taking in the sights.
>Rainbow, still clutching you, squeezes you.
>"This is it, kiddo! The moment of truth. You know your lines?"
"Oh, uhh, yeah! I'm ready!"
>"Alright, good. I'm going to drop you off near him. Get his attention and get him on that ferris wheel no matter what it takes!"
>Salute, much to Rainbow's delight.
"Got it!"
>She grips you and dives off the roof, landing a safe distance from Anon.
>"I don't think he saw us. Time to shine, Scoots! I'll be watching and waiting. Go go go!"
>You scamper into the light of the carnival, your eyes trained on the towering human.
>Shudder at the sight of him.
>He's... -really- big.
>Suppressing your fear, you stalk towards him, taking deep breaths.
"Get him on the wheel... Get him on the wheel... Get him on-- Oof!"
>You walked into his legs.
>The bump alerts him, and he looks down.
>A smile spreads across his face.
>"Heya, Scootaloo. What's wrong? Not with Applebloom and Sweetie Belle tonight?"
"Uhh, no! I'm not, umm. Listen, Anon? Can I ask you a favour?"
>He crouches down, none the wiser to your diabolical scheme.
"I've not been on a ferris wheel in like, forever. So I was just wondering if you would like to come with me on a ride?"
>He strokes his chin with a few fingers.
>"Yeah, I don't see why not. You sure you haven't got anyone else to go with?"
"Nope, I can't find Sweetie or Applebloom anywhere!"
>"Arlighty then, up you come."
"Wait, what-- EEK!"
>He plucks you off the floor and places you on his shoulders.
>You tense up and cling to his head as hard as you can.
>Flying with Rainbow Dash is okay, but towering over your fellow pony while in the shoulders of a giant is something new altogether.
"U-u-uhh I think i-it's over there!"
>"Yeah, I see it. Off we go then!"
>He stride forwards, each footfall sending vibrations through your entire body.
>The human literally steps over other ponies on his way to the wheel, causing several of them to duck down or out of the way.
>"So, Scootaloo."
"Y-yeah?"
>"Why are you so scared of me?"
>Well that was unexpected.
>You take a moment to think about his question as he effortlessly trudges through the sea of ponies on his way to the ferris wheel.
"Umm, you're really big. Like, huge. And that's scary..."
>"Surely that's not all, is it? A brave filly like you can't be scared of something just because it's big. Or... Maybe it's because of--"
>He suddenly send up his hands to where you're sat, probing at you with his fingers.
>You squeal as he pokes and prods all your ticklish spots, tears developing in your eyes as you struggle to stay balanced.
"H-haha! Ahh! Please! S-stop!"
>He chuckles and ceases the tickling.
>You get back to clutching his head, a huge smile on your face.
>"Feel safer now?"
"Yeah, kinda."
>"Sometimes you just need to speak up and say hi, Scootaloo. I'll be honest, I was surprised that it was you who was the last to approach me."
"Huh?"
>"Oh yeah. Applebloom was asking me everything she could think of, Sweetie Belle took about a week, but tracked me down eventually, but you?"
>He muses for a second.
>"Must have been at least four months since I came here, and this is the first time we've actually spoken to one another."
>You don't know what to say. So you say nothing.
>"Ah, here's the wheel. You ready?"
>Looking up at the gargantuan structure, you feel uneasy.
>You're not scared of Anon any more, and he really isn't as bad as you had originally thought.
>Do you really want to subject him to Rainbow's trap?
>Visions of Rainbow Dash's angry gaze fill your mind.
>'You did WHAT? Scootaloo! This was our big chance! How COULD you?!'
>You shudder
>She wouldn't do that, surely.
>Anon notices your silence and discomfort.
>"Are you alright, Scootaloo? It's okay, the wheel doesn't move that quic--"
"No, it's not that... Umm. R-rainbow Dash said..."
>You go quiet again.
>Anonymous catches on immediately.
>A heavy sigh passes his lips.
>"Ah. I thought as much..."
>He reaches back and picks you off his shoulders, bringing you into his view.
>A disappointed look is on his face.
>"I suppose I should thank you for admitting it before things got too out of hand. But still, I'm upset, Scootaloo."
"I'm sorry, Anon! It's just that Rainbow goes on about you all the time, and I just want to help her and make her happy and I hate disappointing her and I don't want her to not like me and... A-and..."
>Tears flood your eyes.
>Anon pulls you close to him and shushes you.
>"It's alright, Scootaloo."
>He strolls over to a bench at a more secluded area and sits down, keeping you held against his chest while you try not to cry.
>"Want to talk about it?"
>His soft voice is somewhat comforting, and you pull back, looking into the face of the alien, who looks far more concerned than disappointed now.
"You hate me, don't you..."
>"Of course I don't hate you, Scootaloo! You were only doing this to help Rainbow Dash. And while I certainly don't get along with that madmare, I get along with you."
>Feeling a bit better, you manage a small smile.
>Anon's face softens in response.
>"There we are! Do you want to go and find Applebloom and Sweetie Belle?"
>"No no, Anon. I'll uhh, look after her now."
>You both turn to see Rainbow Dash.
>She looks... Terrible.
>The pegasus trots over, her normal confident stride all but gone.
>She sits down on the bench next to Anon and sighs.
>"Scoots. You should have just told me."
>You don't know what to say.
>Everything is going so wrong, and now Rainbow Dash is going to be mad at you.
>"I said you could stop helping me at any time, Scoots. You didn't have to go through this just for my sake."
"But I like help--"
>"I know you do. But this is too much. I shouldn't have asked this much from you. You're only young, Scootaloo. And I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. Maaaybe you should just stop trying to help me with my uhh, 'relationships' altogether."
>She smiles sheepishly at Anon, who glares back.
>Rainbow then slouches and gives you a mournful look.
>"I haven't been a very good role model, have I?"
"What? No! You've been great!"
>"No, I haven't. All I've done is drag you along and make you put up with my crap. I suck as a big sister..."
>She looks genuinely hurt.
>It pains you to see her like that.
>To your surprise, it's Anon and reaches over and strokes her mane.
>"You're annoying as hell, Rainbow. But it's obvious that Scootaloo looks up to you. If you've earned this much devotion from her, you must be doing -something- right, right?"
>The corners of the pegasus' mouth curve up ever so slightly.
>"I guess. But it still doesn't excuse my actions."
>She sits up and looks Anon dead in the eye.
>"Anon, I'm sorry for being so..."
>"Obsessive? Annoying? Creepy? Horse-like?"
>Rainbow snickers.
>"Yeah, all that. Can ya forgive me?"
>Anon ponders for a second.
>"I suppose I can. Maybe. You'll have to make it up to me, though. That pitfall hurt like hell."
>"But you broke every bone in my body as payback!"
>"-That- was for the pictures you planted in my house. I'm still thinking of a way you could pay me back for the hole."
>Rainbow grumbles to herself and the pair go quiet again.
>You are contemplative as the carnival goes on in front of you.
>Foals run around laughing, and pony couples happily trot alongside each other, enjoying the night's delights and wonders under the romantic glow of the carnival.
>You watch one such couple nuzzle each other before going into a haunted house.
>It gives you an idea.
>A crazy idea that might just be out the left-field enough to work.
"Guys?"
>Rainbow Dash's ears perk up and Anon looks down at you.
"Why don't you two just go on a date for this one night?"
>Anon scoffs.
>"Scootaloo, really. I think I have better things to do with my time than let Rainbow Dash suck my face during carnival games."
"No no, I don't mean you have to kiss each other... But, why not just go around the carnival? As friends?"
>The human and the pegasus share a look.
>Anon rubs the back of his head.
>"I guess, Maybe? What do you think, Dash?"
>You can't quite tell in the dark, but you think Rainbow might be blushing from being called 'Dash'.
>"S-sure. I can use the time to make it up to you, right?"
>Anon chuckles.
>It's a lovely sound.
>"Then it's a deal. You show me a good time tonight and I might forgive you for the pitfall."
>You sigh happily as the two stand up, with you hopping off Anon's lap and onto the floor.
"I'll just leave you two alone then! I needed to find the others anyw-aAAY!"
>The human plucks you off the floor once more and places you on his left shoulder.
>You manage to balance yourself, just.
>"Oh no you don't, Scootaloo."
>Rainbow Dash hovers into view, a broad grin plastered on her face once more.
>"Yeah! We need to thank you for sorting things out between us!"
>Anon's hand reaches up and tussles your mane.
>"This was a much better plan that locking me in a ferris wheel with that crazy mare."
>"Hey!"
>Rainbow and Anon share a laugh.
>The human takes a step towards the carnival.
>"Come on. We'll all go."
>He takes another step.
>"As one big happy family."
>You lean against the side of Anon's head and close your eyes.
>A tired but happy expression works its way onto your lips as you all head back into the light of the carnival.
>The sights and sounds of the festival envelops you.
>Above the din, you can hear Rainbow and Anon chatting away without a care in the world.
>You can hear the joy in her voice.
>And if she's happy, you're happy.
>It almost makes all the trouble to get them together worth it.

>Almost.

The End.