The original is from a pastebin from 2012 https://pastebin.com/QdtXWds0 >All is darkness. >All is cold. >All is dust. >You do not know what year it is, for so many have passed. >You are Anonymous. >And the Universe has ended. >Entropy has taken its toll on existence. Planets have crumbled, the stars have burned out, the black holes fell victim to hawking radiation. >As it turns out, this Universe doesn't know what the fuck to do with you, and you are somewhat exempt from the laws of physics. As reality disintigrated, you were left whole and untouched, effectively immortal, bearing witness to the fall of reality. Now all that is left is you, dust, and Princess Celestia. >And it's been that way for a long time. >Not that you really mind. Sure you've gone loco on-and-off in the countless and unchanging trillions of years. But then again, you've gone crazy waaaaay before everything went south, so it was all just part of the larger pattern for you. Besides, it's been a long time since your last bout of koo-koo. You felt proud of yourself. You like to think you've adapted to your current existence, making up knock-knock jokes and doing Hank Hill impersonations. >Not that Celestia actually paid any attention to those. >She hasn't done much for the past few eons. >You look at her. Dust covers her form. She's curled up as small as she can, her wrings wrapped tightly around her. Her hair is dim. Almost colorless. It hangs limply around her, like wet satin. The last time you saw her eyes she had this weird sort of billion-year stare going on. >It was slightly better than her babbling on about friendship or trying to reanimate cosmic dust into a new student or something. She kept trying to do that for the first eighteen million years, it got really annoying. > Even though her magic wasn't anywhere near what it used to be, you're pretty sure she's the only reason the barest thread of reality is holding, but her grasp on it is tenuous at best. >Yeah, Celest is pretty bummed out. >In fact, you're pretty sure she'd end it all if she could. She tried killing herself five trillion years after the last star went out, but just couldn't pull it off. There was screaming, and flashes of un-lightning...it was actually pretty fucking creepy. But the point was she couldn't end it, even though she clearly wanted too. You thought she just really needed to fucking chill out and keep herself busy, like you did. >But still, you didn't like thinking of that particular eon. It made you feel.... >Nope. >You were bored. >You haven't had a conversation for a few billion years, and you felt chatty all of a sudden. >"Hey Celestia, you DTF?" >She looks at you. >YFW Her eyes are red. And they look so...so tired. You can tell she's coming back from a far away place where she tries very hard not to think about her curse of spending eternity in an void with you. "Wh...what?" >Her voice is like some far off thunderstorm, powerful, all encompassing, but faded and tired. The dust shakes from her. >"DTF. Down-To-Fuck! Just you and me. It's not like there's anyone around to catch us. Break the monotony a little bit, get the blood pumping. Unf. I mean, come one, we're friends, right?" >Yeah. This was a totally good idea. A round of hokie-pokie would bring her right out of her slump and get her talking again. Who knows, maybe she'll even start playing charades with you! >She stares. >"I've been freezing my balls off here for like...an eternity. I think the last time I got one off was eighty trillion years ago to some photons colliding. I don't even know if my friendship cannon works anymore. Hell, I think I jizzed ice last time. I mean, jeeze, what do I have, a penis or a popsicle?" >She blinks. Twice. She takes about twenty years between the two. >"Who knows, maybe a little sweet bestial lovin' might warm up the place." >And her eyes widen. >She seems to consider it. >"Come on baby, we're nothing but mammals, so let's do it how they do on the Discovery Channel." Damn, you missed that shit. >She mutters something. >"Say huh? Didn't catch that." "You...are my friend." >Low thunderstorms again. >True, you two were never what anyone would call "close" before the end days, but since then you liked to think you two developed a real bond. She didn't even start screaming and crying everytime you looked at her anymore. "You...are my ONLY friend." >"That's right. Besties. You and me, two peas in a pod." "And that will have to do." >She stretched out. Her wings flared out fully, sending out tons of dust flying lightyears in every direction, like a sail that never stopped unfurling. You were blown back a considerable distance. >And for the first time in a very, very, very long time, her eyes began to glow. "Come Anon." >She drifted towards you. "Let's make some magic." >HOT DAMN! >She's reared up over you. You forgot how big she was. Her large forehooves wrap themselves gently around your shoulders and she looks at you with her big, purple, tired eyes. >And yet...you see something in them. You want to say hope, but you weren't sure that existed anymore. You remember the last time she hoped for something... >Oh fuck. >Oh shit. >You were remembering. >Your jimmies began to rustle for the first time in a very, very, very, long fucking time. >It was the last star in the Universe. A sad little carbon star born out of the pitiful refuse of a dead galaxy. The Universe had gone dark by then, but Celestia picked up on that small, microscopic speck of light and she took off for it. It took you a forever to catch up to her. You weren't as fast as she was. >You found her circling it. It was dim, dusty, and not nearly as warm as the sun she used to command, but still, she was bringing all of her powers down upon it. >Bolts of magic shot from her horn onto the star as she orbited it. It glowed slightly brighter, almost seemed to grow a little bigger. You watched from afar, afraid to get to close. She had an incredible look on her. She was desperate. Scared. Determined. >Hopeful. >She never stopped flying. She had plans for that cloudy star. She wanted to bring it back, all of it. >Yet even with her ministrations the star only lasted two million years. When it went, there was no vast supernova, no final glorious spell of brilliant light. In the broken universe it just dissipated, like a candlelight that couldn't hold itself together. >Even then she tried to hold it together. You never seen her go all out on something like that. She held the dust of the star together, every flake, every atom of the thing together by sheer willpower for years, pumping her very life force into the husk, but in the end she let go just before she could die. >She screamed as it fell apart. >She screamed for a long time. >You didn't like thinking about that. >Your hands wrapped around her strong neck and you hugged her tightly. Her head rested against your back. You could feel her forehooves tighten against you. You were both cold, but it felt nice. >"I'm sorry." Why the fuck did you say that? >There were tears welling up behind your eyes. Which is weird because tears are for pussies. You really hoped you weren't going crazy again. >She rubbed against your hair and began to nuzzle into it, pulling gently against your scalp, breathing softly against your ear. "I've been angry, Anon. I've been beyond anger. And beyond sadness." She placed head against yours. You traced your hands slowly across her jawline. "There was nothing you could do about it. Nothing either of us could." >Different parts of your brain began to work. Parts that made you afraid. Synapses that made you remember and made you scared and made you regret. It took you trillions of years to turn those parts off and now they were lighting up all of a sudden. You were starting to regret this. >But..."I could've...been there. I was there, but I wasn't. Not for you. I'm sorry." You shook your head. "I'm so sorry." It was true. When things were going dark you started to ignore her. You talked to yourself about the dumbest crap and tried to forget about all the friends and loved ones you had. You wanted to forget about Celestia, think of her as something less than a person. "I tried to bring back the dead. That has always been beyond my power, but for some reason I kept trying. I neglected you. My one friend I've always had." You could feel tears on her face. "Dirt and dust and dying particles were more precious to me than you. Somehow...the idea that you are exactly what I need never occurred to me." >She pulled back and looked at you. >Hope. "You say you're sorry. Then help me." >"How?" "Be my friend. Be the greatest friend I ever had or will have. I'm going to trust you with something. I need you to be honest with me. Loyal, kind...I need you to give me everything you can bear. Please." >She kissed you. Tentatively at first, as if she was trying to remember how it was done. You responded. Your lips pressed and brushed against hers, breaths intermingling, taking in each others scent, truly for the first time, it seemed. You held it, savoring something new. "I need you to love me."