Title: Ogryn Anon RGRE
Description: Short Reverse Gender Roles Equestria (RGRE) green about Anon the Ogryn from Warhammer 40K franchise
Original thread: https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/40169713/#40180056
Status: Complete
 
========

>Be Anon
>But more importantantsly, be Ogryn!
>The best and toughest in the Ass-tro-Mee-lee-tar-rum
>You are in very bright outside with lots of little horsies and green growies
>You don't know how you got here
>What happened before?
>You try to remember
>The veteran dared you to dip your balls in liquid promethium
>Naw, you were fine after that
>There was that beast o' Nurgle ate ya
>But your mates saved ya
>Oh, you got it!
>There was a boom barrel
>You're friend hit it with his Rippa when you were near it
>Classic Ogryn joke!
>You remember flying into darkness after
>Are you dead?
>Is this the Emprah's house?
>Maybe Ogryn joke is too dangerous, just like Boss said

===

>Little horsies are nice
>Littler than the little humies though
>You're helping Appuljack and Bigmac with raising a barn
>You just lift heavy things and hold it
>Just finishing the job
>'whew! That's done. You've been a big help Anon'
Is what I do, Ogryn is best at jobs like this ma'am
>'You really seem to like simple labour huh?'
Ma'am, yes ma'am. Dumb jobs is best for me.
>Appulbloom gives everyone some juice
>'Hey Anon, what was your job before coming here?'
I was in the guard and I fought heritics for the comiesar
AND I WAS BLEEDING GOOD AT IT
>All Appul horses start saying things at once
>Lots of nonce-sense about too dangerous or something
>This always happens when you tell the horsies what you did

===

>Helping spark-head horse
>The purple one, Twoiloight Sparkle-head
>She has a spikey bit on her head but it's not like the heritics spikey bits
>'Alright Anon, please answer these questions as best you can.'
Okay Ma'am
>Twoiloight's test asks alot of hard questions like 'what is your name' and 'are you ready'
>'Hmmm, according to this your IQ is just below the average, for equestrian stallions that is.'
>Smile with pride for another job well done

===

>Helping 3 littler ponies
>Appulbloom, Scootloo, and Sweetbelle
>You have found new great job for Ogryn
>Taste Tester!
>But also other secret job (shhh don't tell them)
>'Here Anon, try this one'
>Sweetbelle puts a plate of some green-brown-black pile in front of you
>You take big spoon and take big Ogryn bite
Is delicious, what is it?
>Scootloo answers proudly
>'Its supposed to be a cake but we made a few 'executive' substitutions'
>You finish the plate and stack it on the other finished plates
>Stack is now taller than pony

===

>Be Rarity
>Watch Anon entertain the CMC for a moment
>You were saddled with taking care of the CMC for a spell but you had a lot of work to complete
>Luckily you were able to recruit Anon to help
>He may be a giant alien but he still had a natural fatherly talent to oversee and entertain foals, keeping them out of trouble
>He had effectively contained any damage they could do to the kitchen, letting you get some much needed peace and quiet
>Heck, maybe with all this practice Sweetie could cook a meal without turning it to coal!

===

>Be Anon
>Enjoying many drinks with little horsie friend Rainb'Dash
>Good Ogryn recipe for grog, mix lots of corpse starch and toast in boiling water
>When very warm, put lots of malt grain
>Make sure not too hot!
>Wait for long time
>Add lots of sweet things like corpse sugar, candy, corpse sugar, jam, cookies, fruit, corpse sugar
>Add yeast
>Wait 7 sleepy times
>Mix one time every sleepy time
>Taste sometimes to make sure it's good but do not drink it all dummy
>Mix in amasec if weak
>Some Ogryn like bits and sludge in drink, not Anon!
>Anon is Ogryn of culture
>Move drink to new barrel without bits and sludge
>Bits and sludge make good desert! But that is another recipe
>Wait more sleepy times, maybe 7
>New sludge is on bottom so need to be careful, do not stir!
>Can drink carefully or move to clean barrel without sludge to drink
>'Hey, this stuff's pretty good'
>Rainb'Dash puts head in and takes big drink straight from barrel
>Ogryn is not fussy but that is rude, even for Orgryn
>You pull her out and dip mug in for her
>'Hehe, thanks big guy'

===

>You and Rainb'Dash have now drinked to drunk
>Is good feeling
>Rainb'Dash talk lots about fighting and flying
>You tell many stories of bashing heretics too
>She likes to lay on you and your belly
>You like to pet her head
>You show collection of clubs
Loss old collection when I come here so I make new one
This one is tree branch and iron bar wrapped around, very strong, my favorite
>'Whoa, can I hold it?'
>You nod
>Rainb'Dash lifts heavy club but is hard for little pony
>'You're pretty crafty for a colt'
>She puts the club down
>Then gets close to you
>'You know, big guy, there's one club that I haven't seen yet'
>Rainb'Dash makes funny face and winks
>You don't understand, but that is normal
This is all Ogryn clubs Anon has
>'Come on, Anon, I'm asking if you want a roll in the hay'
>You shake your head
Hay is itchy
>'I'm talking about sex, you goofball. I want to have some fun and I think you do too'
Oh sex! Yes, Anon loves sex!
>'Heck yeah!'

===

>Rainb'Dash leans backwards and shows private bits to you
>And
>And...
>There is a smell that hits you like charging grox
>The smell is familiar
>It smells like Plague Ogryn but worse!
>Then you see the bits
>You fear no Man or Ogryn
>But that *thing*
>It scares you
>Stomach feels pain, very bad
Is Rainb'Dash... a nurgle heretic?
>'Huh? What are ya talking about, big guy?'
>You remember 'deconstamintation protocle' and now you understand why Boss made you do that
>This is Nurgle curse
>You push Rainb'Dash off and puke all over floor
>'A-Are you okay?'
>Not time for talking, now is time for fixing
>You grab Rainb'Dash strongly so no escape and start run to Medicae place
>'Hey what's going on!'
>Rainb'Dash tries to worm out but Anon too strong, even when puking more on run
>You run all the way to Medicae ponies
>Slam Rainb'Dash on counter, still holding strong
>'Anon, let me go. This is crazy'
>You talk to the little medicae horsie at counter
Nurgle curse on Rainb'Dash. You need to fix it!
>Medicae horsie is confused
>'I'm sorry, what does that mean?'
>You pull Rainb'Dash's legs open to show
>Medicae horsie screams and pukes at same time and falls over
>Other ponies in waiting room puke from smell
>Other medicae horsie comes quick
>'What the buck is going on in here?'
>You turn Rainb'Dash towards her
>She screams and pukes at the same time too
>Then she talks into walkie talkie
>'CODE R-[BLARRG] RED. REPEAT CODE RED [HUUURLG]'

===

>Rainb'Dash is in special room so no smell or curse escape
>You and smart doctor are outside
>Smart doctor pony talks to you and Rainb'Dash
>'Rainbow Dash has an advanced vaginal yeast infection but it seems like we caught it just in time before permanent damage and infertility. We'll start an agressive course of antibiotics, vaginal flushes, and a 6 month hygiene training course for Ms. Dash. It's extremely reckless letting it get this bad Ms. Dash.'
>Dash talks back
>'How was I supposed to know that's not what it's supposed to look like? No one ever told me.'
>Doctor gives very mean look to Rainb'Dash, like Commisar to bad soldier
>He talks to you now
>'You did good bringing this to our attention Mr. Ogryn. We all need friends to look out for our blind spots.'
>You smile big Ogryn smile
>Proud of another little'un protected from Heretics
>The Emprah protects