/jacky/ IF Scenario B: Bootleg Anon


                                            >Be you

                                            >Be undeniably comfortable for a Sunday

                                            >Sundays and Saturdays are when Jacky doesn't have to go to work

                                            >You've spent almost all day laying between her legs with your head on her lap

                                            >You really are happy to have ended up with her

                                            >She's a complete dork, but you wouldn't want her any other way

                                            >You wobble to your hooves, yawning out the opening tune to X-Files

                                            "Hey Jacky... y'up?"

                                            >A quick glance shows that she's still KO'd

                                            >Both of you did dip into a bottle of the whiskey but you woke up just fine

                                            >You nudge her thigh with one of your hooves

                                            "Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey."

                                            >You nudge her with every 'hey'

                                            "Hey. Hey... if you don't get up I'm going to lick your face."

                                            >Wait, if she was up, she wouldn't act like she was so that exact same thing would happen

                                            >As you contemplate what to do with yourself and the alcohol fan, you hear someone walking by from behind

                                            >You spin around and catch a glimpse at Sparky

                                            "Hey, hey Sparks! Hold up a sec!"

                                            >You jump off the bed and stick the landing before trotting out into the hallway

                                            "What'cha up to?"

                                            >You know she knows you're there because you can hear her sigh

                                            "Jacky's out cold and I don't feel like doing anything I shouldn't."

                                            >Sparks finally acknowledges you

                                            >"Anon, you know I find you weird."

                                            "And?"

                                            >"And you're really weird."

                                            "And?"

                                            >"And you're Jacky's pony, not mine."

                                            "What does that have to do with anything?"

                                            >"So bug her."

                                            >You keep following her while she walks around, obviously trying to tire you out

                                            >Won't work, lady

                                            "Come on... why can't we be more friends?"

                                            >"Because you're like... her surrogate boyfriend or something at this point. It's weird."

                                            >You frown

                                            >That kinda hurt

                                            "I'm... just a surrogate?"

                                            >That makes you require a sit down

                                            "Dang. I thought I was more than that."

                                            >The wind left your sails completely

                                            >Sparks watches you visibly deflate

                                            >She gives a dull 'uuuuuugh' and bends over, patting your head

                                            >"Listen, Anon. You're a cool... pony... thing. Jacky loves you with all her heart because she's smiled more with you than I've ever seen since we were kids. And that was a while ago."

                                            >Your ears perk up a bit but you aren't revived yet

                                            "Yeah, I get that... but I've heard you two argue a lot. Even if it's just you two goofing around, I want us all to be more cool to each other. And Dashie doesn't even stop by all that much, and Jack told me all of you used to hang out almost every day and now she's just... gone, it seems."

                                            >"Why do you call her Da... your nicknames are weird, ok? And it isn't your fault or anything."

                                            "Well I know that. But I still think I should at least help."

                                            >"Yeah... maybe that's why she likes you so much."

                                            >She ruffles your mane and finally breaks her stoic mask with a smile

                                            >"We have little... rough patches. But she'll get over herself. She always has before."

                                            "Yeah. Maybe. But what about you and Jack?"

                                            >She shrugs

                                            >"What about us? We live together. We said we would when we were in highschool and we're still friends. It just means that we can piss each other off that much more than we can with other people and know it won't mean as much."

                                            >That sounded about right

                                            >As dense as Jacky is about some things, it is easy to make fun of her

                                            >Even you've done that

                                            >On the other hand, Sparks is so stubborn and easy to annoy but she's like a magician with all sorts of things she can do

                                            >She seems spooky levels of empathetic too

                                            "I guess that makes sense... hey, what are you up to, anyway?"

                                            >She sighs

                                            >"Nothing, now. You need something?"

                                            "Yeah. I wanna wake up Jacky but I don't know how."

                                            >"You guys drinking and stuff again?"

                                            "Well, she was drinking and I-"

                                            >"Ok, stop talking. I get it. I got just the thing..."

                                            >After some prep work, and a slight costume change, you bounce onto Jacky's bed and adopt your most heroic voice

                                            "STAND DOWN, CITIZEN, FOR IT IS I, CAPTAIN EQUINE. AWAKEN, OR HAVE YOUR DREAMS OF EVIL ANNIHILATED!"

                                            >Jacky sputters something out as the shockwave of you leaping up onto her bed shakes her awake

                                            >She looks at you, orange hair covering one of her eyes, with a squint

                                            >"Anon, what in..."

                                            >Her eyes shoot open

                                            >"W-what are, how did... take off my panties you little freak!"

                                            "NEGATIVE, CITIZEN."

                                            >You stand proud, a pair of Jacky's boyshorts on your face

                                            >Due to how they don't completely fit on your horse face, they're more set up to sit on the top of your head, with both of the holes for legs revealing an eye

                                            >You give an award winning smile

                                            "AWAKEN FROM YOUR ALCOHOLIC HIBERNATION, THERE'S EVIL TO FACE!"

                                            >You can hear Sparks laughing from around the corner

                                            >The longer it goes on, the louder she's laughing

                                            >"Take those off this instant or I'll-"

                                            "ORAL ACQUIESCING WILL NOT STOP CAPTAIN EQUINE FROM ABSCONDING. WITH JUSTICE."

                                            >You leap off of her bed, stumbling once you hit the ground to gallop away

                                            >Jacky stumbles out of bed, hitting the floor half as gracefully as you do

                                            >At least she's wearing a shirt as well as shorts

                                            >This time

                                            >Sparks is doubled over as you gallop out, underwear firmly attached to your head with a few strips of tape

                                            "FOLLOW ME, JACKY OF JIM BEAN, FOR GRRRRRRRRRRRRRREAT JUSTICE!"

                                            >You spend the rest of your energy ducking, dodging and diving away from Jacky's attempts to capture you

                                            >She's strong enough to carry you down a hallway so she isn't a pushoever

                                            >But the booze in her system is keeping her from eloquently chasing you

                                            >Only when you spring onto the bed again does she stumble into her room, huffing and panting

                                            >"You... are asking for it, Anon."

                                            >She leans against the doorway, fanning herself with the collar of her shirt

                                            "JOIN ME IN ADVENTURE."

                                            >She looks at you with a mix of murder and sloppy fatigue in her eye

                                            >"Can't we just chill? It's a Sunday..."

                                            "IT IS ALSO... uh..."

                                            >You look around the room, unable to find a clock or her phone

                                            >She points toward the desktop monitor, which is near her bed

                                            >You glance at it, turning to the head to give yourself better vision

                                            >As tight as these are, you're surprised you can see anything at all

                                            "Ah, ok, IT IS TH...TW..."

                                            >You step closer to the monitor, unable to get a solid read

                                            >Jacky plops down onto her bed next to you and fishes out her phone from around somewhere in her sea of blankets

                                            >"It's almost five."

                                            "ALMOST FIVE. WE'VE SLEPT THE ENTIRE DAY AWAY!"

                                            >You feel a pair of arms snake around your torso before she jerks you off your hooves

                                            >You land at on your side, half on top of her

                                            >At least your shoulder landed on somewhere soft

                                            >"It's Sunday and we fooled around aaaaaaaaaalllllllllll yesterday. So let's just relax. I can put on some music if you like."

                                            "NEGATIVE, I MUST--"

                                            >You struggle to escape her grasp until you feel your power drain

                                            >Your superpony powers and drive to end all threats to the world drains the second she rips off your underwear-based mask

                                            "OH NO I'M GEeetting weaaaakkkk....ahh..."

                                            >You weakly thrash about before going limp

                                            >You even push out your tongue to simulate a hero's dignified death

                                            >Only when you feel a thumb and index finger tug on it do you revive

                                            >But only as Anon

                                            "Oh, hey there, you're awake. Fancy meeting you here."

                                            >"Mmmhmm."

                                            >Jacky had already closed her eyes

                                            >The smile on her face is enough to make you jump out the window with your heroic mask on to truly save the world

                                            >Even if it would only lead to going outside where the neighbors can see

                                            "Hey Jack..."

                                            >You nuzzle against her

                                            >"Mmmmmhmm?"

                                            "Sparky said I was your boyfriend."

                                            >You hear her 'hmmm' turn into something dubious

                                            >She stretches and does her best to hide a hiccup

                                            "I think she's jealous, personally."

                                            >That finally gets her to speak

                                            >"If I had any brains, I'd be jealous too."

                                            "Good thing you don't have a lot of those otherwise you'd be super jealous."

                                            >"I'm gonna take that as a compliment..."

                                            "I will too."

                                            >She sounds happy

                                            >That makes you happy


                                            >Things have changed a lot over the last...

                                            >How long has it been? Over a year?

                                            >Sparky didn't really like you all that much for a while

                                            >That has changed

                                            >Changed enough that she dragged you to her bed after Jacky drank herself into an early sleep

                                            >She's been working a lot more lately, and seems really satisfied with things now

                                            >Money wasn't an issue before, as far as you knew, but now it really isn't an issue

                                            >Sparky has been doing things online and evidently that was paying off

                                            >To be honest, you haven't paid much attention to it, you just know that it involves her playing games and talking in a weird voice

                                            >You try to free yourself from the redhead's embrace

                                            >She hugs so much tighter than Jacky

                                            >Even sleeping, she doesn't let go easily

                                            >"Mmm. You up already?"

                                            "Yeah, don't mind me, I'm just... I'm gonna go an..."

                                            >You try to push yourself free with every start of a sentence

                                            >Obviously it doesn't work

                                            >One of her arms tighten around your chest, the other snakes down to your hind legs

                                            >Between them, rather

                                            >"Yup, you're sure up."

                                            "ALRIGHTY then!"

                                            >You flop over and fall off the bed

                                            >You still aren't used to her doing that

                                            >Not that you'd ever admit that you sorta don't mind it

                                            "G-geeze, a little easy on the horse apples... those are Jacky's bread and butter there."

                                            >It is no secret now

                                            >A long while back she did tell you that you were more or less Jacky's boyfriend

                                            >The two had some really loud arguments about it even

                                            >First it was the noise

                                            >Then it was you being a siphon on resources

                                            >Then it was jealousy

                                            >You did your best to act like it wasn't happening but there wasn't a whole ton you could honestly do to occupy yourself

                                            >Video games were a crapshoot

                                            >You liked watching movies with Jacky but those always led to... distractions

                                            >You've gotten used to doing laundry

                                            >And mopping the floor

                                            "I'm just gonna..."

                                            >"Go take care of that? Yeah. For the best. Just let me know if you need a hand."

                                            >Your ears flatten against your head as you get up on out of her room

                                            >One night after a heavy night of drinking...

                                            >Well, you've made a point to remember as much as you can about how Jacky treats you

                                            >Speaking of, you hunker down low and crawl along the floor toward Jack's room

                                            >The floor kinda helps scratch that particular itch

                                            >She's already awake, going through her phone

                                            >Her eyes meet yours

                                            >You freeze

                                            >"...You."

                                            >Your entire body tenses up

                                            >"REMATCH, NOW!"

                                            >She fumbles out of bed, wearing only a pair of shorts

                                            >She assumes some sort of wrestling stance

                                            >In some miraculously autistic screech, you launch yourself at her

                                            >Despite the distance, you body slam into her torso

                                            >You can hear that you knocked the air out of her

                                            >She wraps her arms around you and falls back onto the bed

                                            "VICTORYYYYYYYYYY!"

                                            >She coughs and sputters to regain use of her lungs

                                            >"Y-yeah, y'alright, you got that one."

                                            "I knew I would."

                                            >"You ain't know nothin'."

                                            "Still more than you."

                                            >"Oh you little..."


                                            >She lets go of her hug and runs her hands over your mane

                                            >"Well aren't you all happy and energized today."

                                            "Well I wanted t..."

                                            >The smile she's giving you lets you know that she knows

                                            "...I woke up this way."

                                            >"Yeah hm."

                                            "I did."

                                            >"Right."

                                            >You lift your head up to butt your chin against her forehead

                                            "I'll have you know that I am a talking magical pony and you are focused on one of the most natural things about me instead of the fact that I talk."

                                            >"Horse feathers, you don't know magic."

                                            "Do so! I can make my fingers disappear!"

                                            >"You ain't got no fingers, Anon."

                                            "Exactly my point! You never know what I could get away with."

                                            >She shakes her head and smiles

                                            >"Yeah... you sure aren't normal, that's for sure."

                                            >She still looks a little tired

                                            >She's been working a lot of overtime lately, you know that much

                                            >"Sparky been treating you ok?"

                                            >She knows that Sparks has gotten... aggressive sometimes

                                            >You try your best to not say anything about it so you don't cause any problems but it's probably hard to hide something like that in such a relatively small apartment

                                            >You just want to keep things as easy going as you can

                                            "Yeah, she was showing me one of her speed runs and... well, you know how she is."

                                            >"Yeah... sure do. Don't you worry."

                                            >She gives your shoulders a few hard pats

                                            >"Now get up. I'll take care of you later but Dash said she was about ten minutes out."

                                            "More work?"

                                            >"Yup."

                                            >You slide off of her, as quickly as she allows you to

                                            >You still don't know all of the specifics of what Jack does for work but you don't mind it

                                            "So are you helping her with stuff or...?"

                                            >"She needs a driver basically. She keeps talking about getting a car but any real lump sum of money she makes, she sends to my account. Guess she figures that I'm the most responsible of us or something."

                                            >You've only met Dashie once, or twice

                                            >She doesn't scare you

                                            >Scratch that, she sorta does

                                            >Jack takes her time getting dressed, dropping her shorts to figure out an entire outfit

                                            >After the first time you watched her get ready like that, it has become the norm

                                            >You don't mind it

                                            >When she finally focuses on getting dressed, you leave with her without thought

                                            >She usually doesn't mind you joining her, but you don't always want to get up and go outside

                                            >She tends to ferry around people or do little handyman jobs around town

                                            >It's really not a big town at all

                                            >The population is maybe a couple dozen thousand

                                            >You sit with her in her car

                                            >You know she wants a truck but you really don't see the appeal

                                            "So...is Dashie still..."

                                            >"Doing things she best aught naught? Afraid so..."

                                            "...what happens if she gets caught?"

                                            >"Then prison time. Or someone gets mad and blasts her."

                                            "That... wouldn't be good."

                                            >"No, Anon... it sure would not. Here she comes."

                                            >The passenger side back door opens

                                            >And shuts

                                            >Sitting behind you is a very stern, very serious looking woman


                                            >She doesn't really honestly look older than Jacky but her features look so much mature

                                            >You can feel yourself instinctively shrink back when her eyes focus on you from the side mirror

                                            >"Hello Anonymous. Keeping my sister happy?"

                                            "Y-yeah."

                                            >"And even Sparky, judging from what I've he-"

                                            >"Yeah well Sparky ain't worth anything right now. Where do you need to go today?"

                                            >Jacky sounds annoyed

                                            >Dashie smiles at her remark

                                            >She's still staring at you from the side mirror

                                            >But her smile isn't reaching her eyes

                                            >"You know who."

                                            >Jack signs

                                            >"I guess I do..."

                                            >She lets out a heavy sigh

                                            >"You gotta stop doing this stuff. What happens when a cop finds out? Are we gonna have to move again?"

                                            >"Relax, that won't happen again. You trust me, don't you?"

                                            >"...I guess so, sure..."

                                            >"Good. Don't worry, I'm doing this for us. And little Anon here."

                                            >You actually aren't that small a stallion

                                            >She reaches forward and scratches the top of your head with long fingers

                                            >Her smile is a little unnerving

                                            >"I'm glad you're watching over her. Who knows what I would do if anything bad happened..."

                                            >The playful menace in her voice makes you as minimally comfortable as you can be

                                            >Jacky frowns and keeps to driving

                                            >You don't really remember the name of the streets but you've seen every building so many times that you could probably be dropped off halfway across town and still make it back home fine

                                            >Not that you would

                                            >One nearby farm offered Jack an amount of money that made her spit take from one of her evening shots

                                            >Even to this day she refuses to tell you what the amount was

                                            >The drive, as short as it is, feels eerily quiet

                                            >Jack stops in front of a pawn and gun shop

                                            >"Thank you, sister. I will just be a few minutes."

                                            >Just as soon as she entered, she left

                                            >You exhale hard

                                            >Like you can finally breath

                                            >"...sorry for her, Anon. Sometimes she's... well she can be a little..."

                                            >It sounds like she's struggling to find the right words for it all

                                            "No... no, it's alright. I... uh... I'm glad she's alright with me."

                                            >"Yeah... I am too."

                                            >Jacky rests against the steering wheel

                                            >"I worry about her... I wish she'd come home and just... get something more normal. Like me. Or heck, even like Sparky and her..."

                                            "V-tuber thing?"

                                            >"Yeah, that."

                                            >She shakes her head

                                            >"Who the heck wants to watch some cartoon looking unicorn head make bad jokes and play video games?"

                                            >Her avatar was pretty cute looking

                                            >You are biased, of course

                                            >You haven't ever seen another pony around town except for the actual non-green, non-talking varieties

                                            "...does she have a problem with... y'know..."

                                            >Jacky looks at you out of the corner of her eye

                                            >You clear your throat and dart your eyes downward

                                            >You don't exactly wear anything so it's difficult to hide certain aspects of yourself

                                            >Watching enough movies and shows involving people wearing clothing made you more than a little self-conscious

                                            >Her eyes widen at the realization

                                            >"Oh... oh! OH! Oh... er... not that I think of...?"


                                            >She scratches her wild, unbrushed mane

                                            >"I mean... let's put it this way. When I first told her, she didn't sound... surprised..."

                                            "Oh..."

                                            >"Yyyyeah... but she said that she was happy for me. And she said you're technically better for me than any sort of other guy here so there you go, approval!"

                                            >That doesn't sound like it is approval

                                            "I mean we have to, we can stop and try to-"

                                            >"No."

                                            "No?"

                                            >"No. We ain't gonna stop anything just because she doesn't like it. At the end of the day, it ain't about what she wants that makes me happy. You do. So don't you worry about it, ok?"

                                            "Yeah... ok."

                                            >Not everything is perfect

                                            >Your days are usually spent being Jack's lapdog, or watching movies, or watching Sparky play games

                                            >You're sure that if you could work or do something, everything would be a lot better

                                            >But at least you know that you make Jacky happy

                                            "...can we get something to eat after this?"

                                            >"Sure bud. I don't know about you but I'm tired of having Sparky Stew."

                                            >You enjoy having that

                                            >The only downside is that she insists on her 'payment' being un-interrupted cuddle time with you

                                            "Jack. I promise I'll find a way to help out more."

                                            >Her fingers tap along the steering wheel

                                            "Just... please wait for me to figure it out first."

                                            >"Yeah... don't worry. We're gonna make it. Somehow."