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                                            1.
                                            >You never had it easy
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                                            2.
                                            >Contrary to what most thought about you, growing up was absolute hell
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                                            3.
                                            >Chasing some shady con artist and her dense little sister
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                                            4.
                                            >Sleeping in mud
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                                            5.
                                            >Dealing with the shame of arrests and being stuck in some pig sty of a pen for every mare and stallion to scoff and insult
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                                            6.
                                            >Dealing with getting left behind every time you felt the least amount of comfort
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                                            7.
                                            >Dealing with being so confused and clueless that you didn't even know how to use magic
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                                            8.
                                            >Those were the days, weren't they?
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                                            9.
                                            >You look down at the street from your office
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                                            10.
                                            >All of them have families
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                                            11.
                                            >Friends
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                                            12.
                                            >Trustworthy ponies that live their lives to the fullest
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                                            13.
                                            >You used to avoid these parts of towns and cities
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                                            14.
                                            >They were rich
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                                            15.
                                            >Too rich for you
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                                            16.
                                            >You could never blend in, no matter how hard you tried
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                                            17.
                                            >Even if you were offered something, you didn't know how to grab it with your magic
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                                            18.
                                            >Like a nightmare come true, everyone would look at the filly who was gifted an ice cream and let it fall to the ground
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                                            19.
                                            >It works better now
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                                            20.
                                            >The last time you had an accident, it was covered up
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                                            21.
                                            >But you had to change to another town
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                                            22.
                                            >You've been here for...
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                                            23.
                                            >How long has it been?
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                                            24.
                                            >Three months by next week?
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                                            25.
                                            >You're a respectable mare now
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                                            26.
                                            >You focus on numbers, logistics
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                                            27.
                                            >Due to your help, what used to be a little tinder box of a lumber company has grown
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                                            28.
                                            >Swallowed up competition and spit out the redundant bones
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                                            29.
                                            >You would never admit to it
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                                            30.
                                            >You would never show
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                                            31.
                                            >But part of you enjoyed seeing stallions and mares lamenting about how they could no longer feed their families
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                                            32.
                                            >Why would you care?
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                                            33.
                                            >You got by just fine
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                                            34.
                                            >You did more than just get by
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                                            35.
                                            >Years of crying, fighting, bleeding, stealing, lying
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                                            36.
                                            >All of those things made you the mare that you are today
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                                            37.
                                            >They even call you "Ms. Shine" now
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                                            38.
                                            >No one would ever call you that without your position
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                                            39.
                                            >Your power
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                                            40.
                                            >That is all that matters now, isn't it?
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                                            41.
                                            >Jacky and that "Dashie" of hers...
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                                            42.
                                            >You haven't seen them in years
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                                            43.
                                            >After that fight with that so-called gang of colts, you were left bleeding on the ground
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                                            44.
                                            >That was when your magic first truly came to life
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                                            45.
                                            >It hurt more than anything else in your life, to push your chest back out
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                                            46.
                                            >But apparently you lived
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                                            47.
                                            >They did too, you imagine
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                                            48.
                                            >When you came to visit them a few days after, they were gone
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                                            49.
                                            >The rags they had
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                                            50.
                                            >The bottles of perfume
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                                            51.
                                            >Even the food
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                                            52.
                                            >All of it was still in that rat's nest of a tunnel
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                                            53.
                                            >Of course, you ate all of the food
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                                            54.
                                            >You sold the perfume
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                                            55.
                                            >Or did your best to
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                                            56.
                                            >There's someone always in greater need
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                                            57.
                                            >So you exploited that
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                                            58.
                                            >Without hesitation, you sold every dram of foul smelling floral liquid to anyone who would give you the time of day
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                                            59.
                                            >You wouldn't have
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                                            60.
                                            >But thankfully others did
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                                            61.
                                            >Once you finally started to accumulate enough bits, you bought yourself a meal
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                                            62.
                                            >A real meal
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                                            63.
                                            >You couldn't finish it
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                                            64.
                                            >No matter how ravenous you were, you left two thirds of it alone
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                                            65.
                                            >You never did understand how and why you would so something so wasteful
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                                            66.
                                            >They wouldn't come back fo ryou
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                                            67.
                                            >They weren't your true friends
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                                            68.
                                            >They were never your friends
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                                            69.
                                            >But you were theirs
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                                            70.
                                            >Why else would you have followed them for hundreds and thousands of miles?
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                                            71.
                                            >Why else would you always include them in on your plans and schemes?
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                                            72.
                                            >Sure, some went bad and you had to leave them behind
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                                            73.
                                            >They weren't useless, they could handle themselves
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                                            74.
                                            >And they didn't show hesitation when they were in the clear and you were in trouble
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                                            75.
                                            >You look at your desk
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                                            76.
                                            >Proper
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                                            77.
                                            >Rich, dense wood
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                                            78.
                                            >You had it built, custom-made
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                                            79.
                                            >When you first got an office, it doubled as your home
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                                            80.
                                            >You ate and slept in it
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                                            81.
                                            >A hard wood floor was nothing compared to mud, stone and worse
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                                            82.
                                            >Others took that a sign of endearment and dedication
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                                            83.
                                            >Even where you work right now
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                                            84.
                                            >You wouldn't hesitate to burn everything down if it suited you
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                                            85.
                                            >Why would you care?
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                                            86.
                                            >They paid you
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                                            87.
                                            >You did things no one else could
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                                            88.
                                            >That was as far as that relationship went
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                                            89.
                                            
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                                            90.
                                            >You work until the sun goes down
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                                            91.
                                            >Letters and business offers
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                                            92.
                                            >Warnings of audits if not-at-all-fake threats were ignored
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                                            93.
                                            >A
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                                            94.
                                            >A personal letter?
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                                            95.
                                            >Who would give a letter to you?
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                                            96.
                                            >The last time you had any form of social call or personal letter, it was a suitor
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                                            97.
                                            >Your horn went out of whack and burned him when he said that he loved you
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                                            98.
                                            >You hadn't even met him before, and after only a few hours of talking he went and said that
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                                            99.
                                            >You were mortified but did your best to remain stoic
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                                            100.
                                            >You thought for sure that you would be flayed and left for crows to pick at
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                                            101.
                                            >...Instead, days later the fool's father approached you and apologized
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                                            102.
                                            >He formally apologized for his son's behavior and offered you a job
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                                            103.
                                            >The goal, he said, was apparently to have his son married off and to get a company asset, all at once
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                                            104.
                                            >You still don't get it even today
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                                            105.
                                            >The father has long since been in the ground and the son runs things now
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                                            106.
                                            >He apparently never married but also never spoke to you
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                                            107.
                                            >Not directly
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                                            108.
                                            >Perhaps he knows what's good for him
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                                            109.
                                            >You carefully open the letter
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                                            110.
                                            >You often rip them apart out of poor control but others view it as anger or frustration
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                                            111.
                                            >Compared to what you felt before, this is nothing
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                                            112.
                                            >"Bonjour!
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                                            113.
                                            >This is Madam Jelly Belly. It has come to my attention that you were once friends with a little filly who called herself "Jacky". Do you remember her? I sure hope so!
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                                            114.
                                            >I am reaching out to you in hopes that you have knowledge on where she lives. Ever since she ran away, I have given every bit I could to help find her."
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                                            115.
                                            >...of course
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                                            116.
                                            >You haven't seen her for years and she's still somehow so much more important than you
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                                            117.
                                            >You have the strong urge to stop reading and to just turn the letter to ashes
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                                            118.
                                            >But
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                                            119.
                                            >You continue to read
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                                            120.
                                            >"Through my team's investigations, we have found out through numerous guard reports that you were a known associate of her. I hope this means you were a friend as well?"
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                                            121.
                                            >As if
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                                            122.
                                            >She wasn't your friend
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                                            123.
                                            >Just as you apparently weren't hers
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                                            124.
                                            >"If so, please write me back! I feel foolish for letting her run like that. If she is in trouble, or has found her family, or whatever the situation may be, allow me to help! I promise that I will do everything in my family's power to help. She doesn't need to keep running."
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                                            125.
                                            "Fat chance, lady..."
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                                            126.
                                            >The first words you've spoken all day
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                                            127.
                                            >Bitter and quiet
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                                            128.
                                            >"For your assistance, I have sent an unmarked but signed cheque. To show me your support, please write whatever number you wish and cash it. Upon cashing, I will be notified of your bank of choice and we can talk further.
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                                            129.
                                            >May every day bring a new blessing!
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                                            130.
                                            >~Jelly Belly"
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                                            131.
                                            >You turn the letter over
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                                            132.
                                            >Apparently it is a check
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                                            133.
                                            >Signed and dated too
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                                            134.
                                            >All that is left to fill in is the amount
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                                            135.
                                            >What a silly mare
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                                            136.
                                            >Doesn't she know that someone could openly rob her?
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                                            137.
                                            >What does she have to gain, by risking so much?
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                                            138.
                                            >If the thought were more humorous you might have smiled
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                                            139.
                                            >Instead, the letter ignites in a white-hot blaze
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                                            140.
                                            >You watch the fire dance and consume
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                                            141.
                                            >The fire used to be a dark, bloody red
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                                            142.
                                            >But it brightened up, the more you learned to control it
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                                            143.
                                            >Then it turned to orange
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                                            144.
                                            >Then yellow
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                                            145.
                                            >Blue
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                                            146.
                                            >Now, from blue to even white
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                                            147.
                                            >You hardly recognize it anymore
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                                            148.
                                            >When there are only remnants of ashes that remain, collected in a little red ball
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                                            149.
                                            >It blinks away
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                                            150.
                                            >Outside of the smell of burnt paper and the ambient heat that turned part of your desk black, no traces remain
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                                            151.
                                            >Just like what happened to those two
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                                            152.
                                            
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                                            153.
                                            >You finish your day only when the sun goes down
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                                            154.
                                            >Without moving from your spot, you directly affect the lives of dozens of ponies
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                                            155.
                                            >Some are letters of resignation
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                                            156.
                                            >Letters for assistance or for bonuses
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                                            157.
                                            >Some that are almost legal threats about their businesses getting devoured
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                                            158.
                                            >So much is affected
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                                            159.
                                            >And you can't bring yourself to care
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                                            160.
                                            >If they were smarter, they would surely be in your position
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                                            161.
                                            >If they had friends, they would surely find other work, or have support
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                                            162.
                                            >If they were willing to do what you did, they would surely not be so pathetic
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                                            163.
                                            >But there they were
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                                            164.
                                            >And here you are
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                                            165.
                                            >"Miss Shine?"
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                                            166.
                                            >The faintest smile you could have drops at the sound of some office filly tapping her hoof against your door
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                                            167.
                                            "What."
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                                            168.
                                            >You don't mean to be mean
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                                            169.
                                            >You don't care if you are, granted
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                                            170.
                                            >But the fear in her eyes when she looks at you
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                                            171.
                                            >Part of you knows exactly what that is
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                                            172.
                                            >You can't hate someone who is so clueless
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                                            173.
                                            >You aren't a monster
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                                            174.
                                            >The filly flinches at your cold reply
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                                            175.
                                            >"O-oh, uh, I... ah..."
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                                            176.
                                            >She looks down at the floor, disengaging from your empty stare
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                                            177.
                                            >If you were still that little trash pony, would she still be so cowardly?
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                                            178.
                                            >Probably not
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                                            179.
                                            >The passing thought makes you blink
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                                            180.
                                            "Speak."
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                                            181.
                                            >The idle annoyance in your tone makes her jump high enough to nearly knock her head on the ceiling
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                                            182.
                                            >"AH! I-I'm catering for today's dinner b-because my parents ahum... we r-run a cafe! Would you like some... food? Please?"
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                                            183.
                                            >This is probably a ploy to get you on their good sides
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                                            184.
                                            >Even here, you aren't a nobody
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                                            185.
                                            >You glare at her
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                                            186.
                                            >Rather, it's more like you stare right through her
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                                            187.
                                            >Does she have friends?
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                                            188.
                                            >How will she recount this situation with you?
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                                            189.
                                            >Of all of the things she would says, she probably wouldn't dare badmouth you
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                                            190.
                                            >Because she knows that with a signature and a quickly drafted declaration, you could kill her family
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                                            191.
                                            >...
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                                            192.
                                            >'s business
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                                            193.
                                            >You blink a few times at that thought
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                                            194.
                                            >It doesn't impress you
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                                            195.
                                            >You really don't feel anything at all from it
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                                            196.
                                            "Yes. Thank you. I think I have had them before. My usual."
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                                            197.
                                            >Relieved that you have finally given her an answer, she salutes for a full second before fleeing at full speed
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                                            198.
                                            >"Yes thank you I'll be baaaaaaa..."
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                                            199.
                                            >It's obvious you've frightened her
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                                            200.
                                            >You didn't mean to
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                                            201.
                                            >In record time, the filly and two delivery mares stop by
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                                            202.
                                            >Without moving, you watch the night sky take over while the meal is set up
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                                            203.
                                            >It's a feast, frankly
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                                            204.
                                            >More than enough to feed three
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                                            205.
                                            >"T-thank you for choosing us Miss Shine! P-please come again!"
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                                            206.
                                            >The filly and her two cohorts leave
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                                            207.
                                            >Funny
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                                            208.
                                            >You have more than enough money than you care to count
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                                            209.
                                            >And yet they haven't charged you
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                                            210.
                                            >You paid them exactly once
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                                            211.
                                            >After that, they refused to take your money
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                                            212.
                                            >They came up with excuse after excuse, until the father outright begged that you eat for free
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                                            213.
                                            >The cafe was his grandmother's and he wished to see it flourish long enough for his daughter's foals to run it
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                                            214.
                                            >The notion was hilarious to you
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                                            215.
                                            >At the time, you didn't understand it
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                                            216.
                                            >The mere concept
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                                            217.
                                            >You laughed at him
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                                            218.
                                            >You howled with manic jubilation at his request
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                                            219.
                                            >Much to his horror
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                                            220.
                                            >You could see it in his eyes
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                                            221.
                                            >The look that he was going to die if you said "no"
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                                            222.
                                            >You left, still cackling
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                                            223.
                                            >You never did answer him
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                                            224.
                                            >But apparently he took it as a good sign and always had some pony deliver food right to your office
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                                            225.
                                            >Twice a day, without fail
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                                            226.
                                            >Every breakfast was simple enough
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                                            227.
                                            >Your stomach and body had grown enough that you no longer felt ill by eating an entire plate by yourself
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                                            228.
                                            >And for dinner...
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                                            229.
                                            >Three plates
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                                            230.
                                            >Three separate orders
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                                            231.
                                            >You don't remember what they used to like to eat anymore
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                                            232.
                                            >You have memories
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                                            233.
                                            >But they aren't clear
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                                            234.
                                            "You two better be grateful."
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                                            235.
                                            >You mumble to yourself
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                                            236.
                                            >You eat in silence, watching the two other plates
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                                            237.
                                            >This probably looks pathetic, but no one has ever said it
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                                            238.
                                            >You would feel ashamed
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                                            239.
                                            >But you really just can't feel anything at all
                         by BlondieAnon
                         by BlondieAnon
                         by BlondieAnon
                         by BlondieAnon
                         by BlondieAnon