I wish I were Anonstallion and had a cute autistic family


                                            >be Anonstallion

                                            >or Anonmare, take your pick

                                            >both sitting on the edge of the bed, red in the face, and unable to even look at each other

                                            >only the occasional cough or "So..." would break the silence

                                            >"AARGH, come on, you two!"

                                            >the door swings open and an exasperated Twilight steps in, trailed by a green filly with the most shit eating grin a pony can possibly make

                                            >"I understand it can be a bit awkward to do under surveillance, but this is the third time we've tried this and you can't even touch each other!"

                                            "Well it's tough," Anonstallion defensively replies. "I barely know him in the first place, and he's just sitting there not helping."

                                            "Me!? You're the one with the dick, shouldn't you be making the first move?" Anonmare retorts.

                                            "Maybe he can't get it up anymore," Anonfilly says while nudging Twilight's leg

                                            >a pillow thrown by Anonstallion flattens her

                                            "It works just fine, you've all seen it."

                                            >Anonmare buries her face in her hooves

                                            "Not canon," the filly says muffled under the pillow.

                                            >Twilight is rubbing her temples in frustration

                                            >it seemed like an amazing research opportunity when the three came to her and explained their situation

                                            >beings from a far off world being reborn in Equestria and from each other? How could someone like her not want to figure out what was happening?

                                            >and how could someone like her not be upset at how much her efforts to figure out the process were being stonewalled by the ponies that came to her for help

                                            >"Well then how about you both get to know each other better? You've been in Equestria long enough to have a foal, yet it seems like you hardly know each other's names."

                                            >Twilight's suggestion illicits some grumblings from the two ponies, though not all together rejection of the idea

                                            "I say just booze them up. That's how they ended up with me in the first place," Anonfilly says lifting the pillow off herself

                                            >"That'd be immoral, Fil. Though MAYBE if the control case doesn't result in another from your world making it over we can consider it to recreate the circ-"

                                            "Can we not just use a turkey baster or something!?" Anonmare suddenly blurts out. "Just have him cum in a cup and I'll work from there!"

                                            >Twilight is surprised, but also visibly confused

                                            >very confused

                                            >she looks over to Anonstallion with a look that begs for explanation about what she just said

                                            "Oh, um, on our side there's ways to make babies without needing the parents to actually have sex."

                                            >Twlight's face undergoes rapid changes from deeper confusion, to contemplation, to realization and curiosity, but she recomposes herself to focus on the issue at hand

                                            >"(Ahem) Well, we can look into that later. Right now I do think it's a good idea for you to get comfortable with one another if you're bringing another foal into the world. Especially since your first is a little..."

                                            >she glances at Anonfilly, who's now batting Twilight's tail like a cat playing with a toy

                                            >"...peculiar."

                                            >Anonstallion rolls his eyes

                                            "In our defense, we're pretty sure he was like this even on Earth."

                                            >"'He', 'him'. They were all males in their homeworld," Twilight thinks to herself

                                            >"It was the only constant between them. They each say they're from different parts of their world. Even their ages are so wildly different. The filly claims to be older than her father!"

                                            >she shakes her head to clear out that mental minefield and turns her attention back to the bickering trio

                                            >"Okay, okay. We can try a few things to make the process easier for you. Within reason." she takes a seat between the two

                                            "Such as?" they ask in unison

                                            >"Uhhhhh," she realizes she hadn't actually thought of any suggestions

                                            >"Mood setting music and candles?"

                                            "...Eh, why not?" Anonstallion shrugs

                                            Anonmare just snorts in embarrassment

                                            "How about blindfold? Then they can pretend they're doing it with someone else?" Anonfilly suggests, this time being met with one of Anonmare's pillows to the face

                                            >Twilight sighs. "I need help."


                                            >Twilight had called in just about everyone she knew for any help or advice they could lend

                                            >it seemed whenever one of them was making progress the other would protest

                                            >but a clearer picture of the two was starting to come through

                                            >Anonstallion, sometimes just Anon, was the sentimental type. Much more open to doing things romantically

                                            >he was practically entranced with the way Rarity described an ideal evening that would lead to making love

                                            >really he seemed to like everyone's ideas of a perfect date before copulation

                                            >"Except mine," she thought, remembering how her idea of a quiet evening spent reading books to one another was met with collective eye rolls

                                            >Anonmare, seems to prefer Anonymous, was much more reserved

                                            >the best anyone had gotten her to agree to was keeping the lights low and the music loud

                                            >basically, do as much as possible to keep her checked out of the situation

                                            "Or," she said once "just do it when I'm not expecting it. I'm sure he's thought about, too."

                                            >that took everyone aback, as did Anon's inability to deny the accusation

                                            "Yeah, come on, you have to have made some posts about doing it, right?" Fil had added with her usual instigating glee. "You'd be doing what a bunch of us would kill to do."

                                            >she certainly had a way of making sure she was the only one in a room having fun


                                            >a week would go by with more doomed attempts

                                            >attempts 4 and 5 had ended with their meticulously planned dates to get them more comfortable with each other devolving into more bickering and yelling

                                            >5 was somewhat the more successful of the two, if only because they were pretty liberal with the restaurant's wine

                                            >though as a result their language got particularly colorful. And loud.

                                            >they are not allowed back in that restaurant

                                            >attempt 6 skipped the date and had employed nearly all their requested aides

                                            >blindfolds, music, light inebriation, even Anonstallion's request to make Anonmare, quote, "smell like Rainbow Dash"

                                            "I promise, it's less weird than it sounds. Just let me have this." was his best attempt at giving an actual explanation for it

                                            >hopefully she never figures out why we really had to borrow her bed sheets

                                            >and yet despite all that preparation and how close they got, it still ended in failure

                                            >in hindsight, however, maybe the blindfolds were too much. Not letting them see what they were doing meant they could see what they were DOING

                                            >nor did the music let Anon hear Anonmare's protests about what he was thrusting into

                                            >or rather between in this case, as it were

                                            >"Fil, I think I'm about ready to give up," she said to the filly while going over her notes

                                            "Honestly, you've been over complicating things. Let me take over from here. I promise she'll have another little disappointment or two in there by tomorrow!"

                                            >it was a bad idea, of course, and she knew it

                                            >but she was so fed up with it all she simply said

                                            >"Fine. Just don't tell me what you're planning."

                                            >and with a nod and smile that could almost be mistaken for innocence Anonfilly trotted off to do Celestia-knows-what


                                            >Twilight returned the next day, ready to pack her supplies and give a polite 'Goodbye, sorry I couldn't get you two to have sex.'

                                            >when she knocked on the door to the Anons' home she was answered by Anonfilly, looking particularly proud of herself

                                            >"Oh, Fil, hi. Just came to do a final check up. Are your parents here?"

                                            "Yep. Judging by the time, they should be finishing up about now."

                                            >"Finishing? You mean...?"

                                            >Anonfilly nods and holds her head high as though she just solved world hunger

                                            "Oh yeah. They've been going at it since last night. Ain't that right, neighbor!?" Anonfilly shouts to a mare raking leaves next door

                                            >she quickly turns away and pretends not to have heard her

                                            >"But how?" Twilight asks. "We practically handed them to each other on a silver platter. What did you do to get them-?"

                                            >Anonfilly raises her hoof to stop her

                                            "It's better I just show you. Come on in."

                                            >She follows Fil into their house, immediately being met with a mess comparable to the aftermath of one of her own disastrous magic experiments

                                            >"Gosh, what happened in here?"

                                            "The hardest fucking I ever saw, that's what."

                                            >Anonfilly leads Twilight to the kitchen, guiding her around a minefield of stains on the way

                                            >Twlight is desperately trying to keep her hooves off the ground by the time they reach the kitchen

                                            "Alright, check this out."

                                            >Fil opens one of the lower cupboards she can reach and starts pulling out bottle after bottle of clear and colorful liquids

                                            >"Are those...?"

                                            "Aphrodisiacs? I think so. While you guys were doing all that date stuff I went out and asked everyone I could for anything that could help a stallion and a mare make a foal."

                                            >Twlight recognizes some of the label types on a few of the bottles. Some are from actual clinics, some are over the counter 'remedies', and one even seems to be the kind Zecora uses

                                            >"How did you get all of this by yourself? Some of these need prescriptions."

                                            "Easy. I just did this."

                                            >Anonfilly walks up to Twilight, clears her throat, and looks up at her with the biggest puppy eyes she can

                                            "Excuuse me, my mom and dad said they're having trouble finding a little brother for me and I want to help them, but I don't know how. Can you help me?"

                                            >"Awww, of course I'll help," Twilight scoops up Fil, "I'm sure we can figure something out for-- wait."

                                            >she realizes what's happening and looks down at Anonfilly with a stern look

                                            >she's met with the smuggest mug she's ever seen

                                            >"You're a very naughty filly," she scolds Fil and sets her down

                                            "I'm RESOURCEFUL. Anyway, once I got all of this I just put as much of it as I could into their food and drinks yesterday after you left. And just to make sure Anon wasn't going to pussy out I put my real skills to work."

                                            >she digs out a sketchbook from the cupboard and passes it to Twilight

                                            >the unicorn opens it up to a random page, takes one look at what's on the page, and quickly closes it

                                            >"You drew that!?" she's completely red in the face

                                            "Mhm. Pretty good, huh? I just asked Anon to look over it for any critique and after five minutes he was squirming in his seat trying to hide his boner. You should have seen his face, it was hilarious."

                                            >Twilight did not need to be assaulted with this many mental images

                                            >"Okay, okay, okay! I get it, you did what we couldn't. I'll admit, it was probably a mistake to go about this from purely a pony point of view."

                                            "Don't sweat it. This was my hail mary before locking them in the hallway closet and keeping them in there until they boned."

                                            >"You're starting to make me wonder if it was a good idea to do all this and potentially bring more ponies like you into Equestria."

                                            >Fil responds with a laugh

                                            "What, don't like the one-in-three odds you've seen so far?"

                                            >Twilight is not amused

                                            >"Speaking of the other two-in-three, I take it they're resting in their bedroom? I would have thought I'd at least heard them by now."

                                            "Oh yeah! Thanks for reminding me."

                                            >Anonfilly runs over and opens the fridge, pulling out yet more colorful bottles

                                            >Twilight at least knew for sure what these were. Energy drinks in all sorts of flavors, the kind she'd seen in stores in Manehatten and Cloudsdale

                                            "Come on, we gotta make sure they haven't dehydrated themselves" Anonfilly starts heading down the hall with her forelegs barely holding onto a jumble of bottles

                                            >Twilight follows, still watching her step but also taking in just how much of a disaster zone the place had become since yesterday

                                            >the few photos they had on the walls were on the floor, the bathroom door was wholly off its hinges, and the bedroom door had a huge dent in it where it had been forced open with excessive force

                                            "Uh, you mind getting that for me? My hands are kinda full."

                                            >"Shouldn't we knock first?"

                                            "I know for a fact they're not going to be in any shape to answer or open the door themselves."

                                            >Twilight takes a nervous gulp and uses her magic to open the door, giving it a small bump with her hoof when it was having trouble opening

                                            >the scene that they uncovered left them both speechless

                                            >Anonfilly: HoryShit.png

                                            >Twilight: DisgustedEddieMurphy.gif

                                            >Equestria is not meant to behold these kinds of sights

                                            >nothing in the room was left upright

                                            >even the bed was lopsided from having the legs on its left side broken

                                            >but the worst of it was the puddles. Eveywhere

                                            >but the WORST of it was the source of the mess

                                            >Anonstallion and Anonmare were layed out next to each other on the bed, barely keeping themselves from sliding off it

                                            >the good news is they were still alive. Their heavy breathing made that clear enough

                                            >the bad news is they were absolutely drenched

                                            >where one fluid ended on them and another began, no one knows

                                            >were the scene not such a sensory shock Twilight would have shut the door, but now could only stare in disbelief

                                            "Whoooaaah, that stuff actually worked."

                                            >Anonfilly takes the first steps into the room, navigating the moist spots to the best of her ability to get to reach the exhausted pair.

                                            "Hey, open up. You look like you need a drink." she sets down the pile and waves an orange bottle in front of the green ponies' faces to get their attention.

                                            >She pops open the bottle and starts slowly pouring it into Anon's open mouth

                                            "Twilight, help me out here." she points to Anonymous

                                            >"Huh? Oh, right." Twilight responds, snapping back to reality from her state of shock

                                            >she makes her way to Anonymous' side, wincing when she felt a damp spot beneath her hooves

                                            >she also has to turn her head away for a moment when she gets there and sees that the two are still leaking

                                            >"Just stay calm, Twilight," she thinks to herself as she levitates as purple bottle to Anonmare, "You're making history here."

                                            >she looks over at Fil, who's already opening a second bottle now that the first was completely empty and excitedly recounting to Anon what she saw them doing

                                            >"Just hope it's the kind of history that doesn't get you banished from Equestria."


                                            >"So, how do you feel?" Twilight asked nervously

                                            >after having helped Anonmare drink, then eventually guzzle, a few energy drinks she assisted her to the bathroom to towel herself off

                                            "Like I need to take a cold shower. Forever."

                                            >by now two of their towels had been soaked through and tossed out the window. A third was now being put through it's death march

                                            >"Well, at least the hard part's over now, right?" she gives an awkward laugh

                                            "First, no. Carrying the first foal was tough enough, now I have to do it again. Second, that ended up being Fil, and I know for a fact he's not the worst kind of person that could have been brought over. And third,"

                                            >she casts a very serious gaze at Twilight

                                            "now he has a taste for this. I've seen it in his eyes."

                                            >"F-for what?"

                                            "For ME!"

                                            >Twilight backs up against the wall in surprise

                                            >"But that's good, isn't it? If you're already living together and raising children then you can start getting closer to one another and be a family."

                                            "I didn't ask to be a baby factory when I got here, Twilight. Maybe I would have liked keeping my dick and balls. Maybe I would have liked to settle down with a nice mare and give her children. Instead I get to be the pearly gates through which another guy is going to pass through to get here and potentially live the way I wanted to."

                                            >Twilight is seriously taken aback hearing all this

                                            >"I-if you didn't want another foal, why did you go along with the plans?"

                                            "Because I was sure they wouldn't work." Anonymouse slumps over. "Those rape jokes were just that, jokes. He didn't seem the type to actually do it. But I guess the joke's on me."

                                            >"So, do you want to call this whole thing off?" Twilight asks after a moment to let Anonmare calm down

                                            >she snorts and picks herself off the floor

                                            "Too late for that now, isn't it? No, we're balls deep in this now so we may as well see it to the end."

                                            >she finishes wiping off the last non-dried on wet spots from herself and chucks the towel out the window

                                            >Twilight places a hoof on the glum mare's shoulder

                                            >"That's very brave of you, Anonymous. And don't worry, I'll make sure you get all the help you and Anon need during this. You won't have to worry about a thing."

                                            "...Really?"

                                            >"Whatever you need. I'll even take Fil off your hands for a while when you need it. It's the least I can do since I was the one pushing you to this in the first place."

                                            >A bit of light starts coming back to Anonymous' eyes from Twilight's kindness

                                            "...Thanks, Twilight."

                                            >after a moment, she takes her first good look around, finally taking in how she and Anon had wrecked the place. The bathroom door being off the frame made it easy to look out into the hall and what was left of the living room

                                            "Maybe we should start with a clean up crew."

                                            >Meanwhile, back in the bedroom

                                            >Anonstallion's leaning against the bed while his legs are still recovering

                                            "-And then you carried him from the couch to the dining table, with ONE leg!"

                                            >Anonfilly was still excitedly recounting all the things she saw the older ponies doing during their drugged up rampage

                                            "Fil," he tries to stop the filly while holding his head

                                            >she does not

                                            "I didn't get a chance to sketch it very well since you pretty quickly moved him against the fridge, but THAT I did get-"

                                            "FIL, please! Not helping!"

                                            "Oh, sorry."

                                            >the filly just lowers her voice a bit

                                            "Anyway, that was pretty cool since I'd never thought about a pony bending back like that. I'm for sure using that more often in my art."

                                            >Anon groans in annoyance

                                            "Not what I meant. I'd like to not think about how everything I just did I technically did to a guy."

                                            >confusedfilly.png

                                            "That's your main issue? Not that I basically forced you two into a drug rape doujin?"

                                            >her question is answered with a crusty pillow to the face

                                            "That's it's own issue, which we'll get to. I just don't want to think about how, twice now, even when I had sex with a woman it was actually a guy."

                                            >Anonfilly thinks for a moment and sits down next to Anon to offer a reassuring pat on the back

                                            >or at least tries to. The pillow is stuck to her face

                                            "Dude," she says in a muffled voice, "you did it. You lived the dream. You raped a mare. Like, do you know how jealous I am of you right now? How jealous EVERYONE would be of you?"

                                            >it's not a terribly uplifting speech, but Anonstallion can appreciate that she's trying

                                            "And all you can think about is guys!?"

                                            >inhale

                                            "GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!"

                                            >Anonfilly is thrown against the wall, pillowside first. Naturally, it sticks there with her dangling from it


                                            >the next few weeks were thankfully pretty calm

                                            >the Anons' house was put back together, at great compensation to the cleaners and repair ponies that had been brought in to handle the aftermath

                                            >Twlight had even ordered them replacement furniture for what couldn't be fixed

                                            >though maybe the crib was a bit much

                                            >it's not like Anonfilly was any worse off just being put in a blanketed basket while she had been an infant

                                            >surely the fact she had been running around gloating that her parents had impressed a future princess with their 'raw sexual power' was just something she would have been doing anyway

                                            >surely

                                            >there had been some tensions between Anonstallion and Anonmare for a few days

                                            >Anonmare had made sure that her hind was never facing Ananstallion

                                            >Anonstallion could barely make eye contact with her

                                            >eventually even Fil had had enough of it

                                            "You know, you two are the ostensibly the adults here," she said during another silent dinner. "Shouldn't you do what adults are supposed to do here and talk out their issues? We're not on Earth anymore, you know."

                                            "Fiiiiiiiine."

                                            >the two older ponies say in unison

                                            "Me first," Anonmare says

                                            >she balances her fork on her hoof to point at Anonstallion and squints at him

                                            "Yes or no, are you planning on raping me again?"

                                            >the bluntness of the question catches Anon off guard

                                            "Wha- no. I didn't want to do it the first time. Or the second."

                                            >Anonmare continues glaring at him for a bit, but relents when she can't discern any dishonesty from him

                                            "Alright," she responds. "I guess we can put this all behind us once this whole experiment's done."

                                            >she drops her fork into the bowl of salad in front of her, once again giving up on trying to use it without having hoof magnetism

                                            "And, if we're getting things off our chest, I guess I can't say I wouldn't have done the same thing if I had been the one that lucked out with the dick."

                                            "Well, yeah," Anonstallion says defensively. "I didn't really make the choice myself both times. The first was the alcohol we spent our first paydays on and the second time was HIS fault." He points at Anonfilly

                                            >Fil just nods in agreement and places a hoof over her heart

                                            "And I promise not to put an ungodly concoction of fertility drugs and potions in your food anymore," she says, and wryly adds, "which you can both make sure I don't do by learning to cook yourselves. I can't be the only one here that knows anything about food beyond using a microwave."

                                            >her 'parents' just look at her with quiet annoyance

                                            "Just a suggestion."

                                            >she returns to her meal and lets them continue their conversation

                                            "My turn then," Anonstallion continues. "Do you have any issues with me bringing around any mares I hit it off with?"

                                            >Anonfilly stifles laughter, having already seen Anon's attempts at wooing some of the local mares

                                            "No, why would I have a problem with that? In fact, you should do that. Find someone else to unload into. Hell, I'll help you do so." Anonymous offers

                                            >they stare each other down for a moment

                                            >and give each other a firm hoof shake

                                            "Square?"

                                            "Square."

                                            >Anonfilly raises a hoof to ask a question

                                            "No, you can't drug the mares he brings over. They're going to tell the police." Anonymous answers before she even says anything

                                            >Fil's hoof droops down

                                            "Ugh, you guys are as lame as my real parents."

                                            >she's about to take another bite of her food before she suddenly realizes something and shoots her hoof back u

                                            "Oh, oh oh oh oh! So should I tell the neighbors that you guys are getting a divorce so they don't think it's weird you're bringing chicks over when you already have a me?"

                                            >Anonstallion gives her a disappointed look

                                            >Anonmare buries her face in her bowl


                                            >hatchets buried and gentleman's agreements made, the next weeks go by much smoother in the household

                                            >Anonmare does eventually have to tell Twilight to calm down with all the baby furniture and supplies

                                            >"Well, I think we just need to be prepared," she had explained

                                            >"You two had (ahem) done a very thorough job, so it's probably not out of the question that you might actually be carrying a few foals," she said, flustered at having remembered what she saw that day

                                            >it was here that Anonymous really noticed how much more noticeable the baby bump was compared to the first time with Anonfilly

                                            "...Alright, keep the baby crap coming."

                                            >Anonstallion's attempts to get a girlfriend, or at least a one night stand, were gradually growing from 'desperately stumbling' to 'managed to get a date before spaghetti overflow'

                                            >Anonymous and Fil had taken turns being his wingmen

                                            >the former was actually helpful, even having quickly come up with the excuse that the two pursue an alternative lifestyle when they were asked if the two weren't already a couple with a child

                                            >the latter was much less so

                                            >the worst of it was when she shouted at a group of mares passing by

                                            "Hey, any of you ladies looking to get your butts rearranged!? This is your guy right here!"

                                            >the mares were gone in a cloud of dust

                                            >Anon is ready to dunk Fil into the river

                                            "Maybe they're going to get friends to join." she said to him with a grin


                                            >weeks to months

                                            >as much as she wanted to deny it, Anonmare's pregnancy was starting to have some noticeable effects on her moods

                                            >at first it wasn't anything to worry about. A more jovial day here, a quieter day there

                                            >but eventually it started getting bad

                                            >very bad

                                            >some days she would wake up so angry that Anonstallion and Anonfilly would have to hide to avoid being needlessly yelled at, or worse

                                            >but today? Today was different

                                            >Anon had been at work most of the day, helping haul carts and wagons of materials from the local quarry

                                            >it was surprisingly easy work, owing to his earth pony strength, and certainly paid well enough

                                            >on his way off he'd even managed to chat up a cute orange mare

                                            >his spirits were high as he came home, finding Anonfilly eating her lunch outside

                                            "You look pretty happy, Mr. Wagie." she said as he walked past

                                            "Just a nice day is all," he responds

                                            "Don't say that too soon, dude."

                                            "What's that supposed to mean?"

                                            >Fil just takes a bite of her sandwich and turns away with a smirk

                                            >knowing he's not getting any more info out of her Anon heads for the front door, now a bit concerned

                                            >there didn't seem to be anything wrong when he opened it and found the house just as it was when he left, clean (enough) and warmly lit by the sunlight coming from the windows

                                            >he was starting to think Anonfilly was just trying to mess with him, until he took a few steps inside

                                            >the door was suddenly slammed shut behind him

                                            >when he turned around to see why he saw Anonmare, having kicked it shut and staring at him wide eyed and intently

                                            "You're late." she said

                                            "Uh, late for what?"

                                            >there wasn't anything planned today

                                            >in fact there hadn't been for a while. Hard to do a lot of stuff with a pregnant mare in tow

                                            >there wasn't even any of Anonfilly's cooking waiting

                                            "You usually get here half an hour earlier." Anonymous says still staring right at him

                                            "Well, I started talking with one of the mares placing an order at the quarry. Trying out some of the advice you'd been giving me."

                                            >Anonmare nodded, but didn't break unblinking eye contact

                                            >Anon was taking some steps back as he was talking, Anonymouse matching his pace forward

                                            "Good, good. Getting yourself a squeeze, huh? Someone you can call up anytime you need to shoot a load?"

                                            >Now Anon was getting worried

                                            >his steps back were getting wider and he was having to move around furniture, but she kept following

                                            "That's the plan, right? There's no problem with that." he says as he climbs over the couch to try and put something between him and Anonymous

                                            "Nope, none at all," Anonmare answers

                                            >she slides the couch out of the way with a single hoof

                                            "You can get as many as you want. Get every mare in town if you want. No one's counting. No, the problem is I'm getting nothing."

                                            >everything Anonstallion tried to use as a barrier was being swiftly brushed aside

                                            "I tried getting a nice mare of my own, but no luck. Bad luck, I thought, we got a town without any gay little mares. But I can't just flip a switch and turn off the urges, now can I?"

                                            >Anon is trying to say something, anything, that can get him out of this situation, but she just talks over him

                                            "So eventually I swallow my pride and accept that I'm going to have to use a stallion for this. You want to know what happens every time I try to get one?"

                                            >cornered. She's managed to herd Anon into the kitchen, and the only way out is past her

                                            "They take one look at this," she motions to her belly, now very clearly expecting, "and say some stupid shit like 'Aren't you married?' or 'I'm not into that'," she says in mocking tones, "and run away with their tails between their legs. Now, remind me, who's fault is this?"

                                            >Anon is sweating bullets

                                            "F-Fils?" he answers nervously

                                            >her face doesn't change, but the feeling of anger coming from her is palpable

                                            "On the bed. Now." she says

                                            >it's now or never

                                            >Anonstallion makes a break for the door, but find himself face down on the floor after just two steps

                                            >looking back he sees Anonmare caught his tail under her hooves

                                            "Still got some energy in you? Good. Let's put it to use."

                                            >she grabs onto his tail with her teeth and starts dragging him to the bedroom

                                            >Anon is about to give up hope when the front door opens and Anonfilly steps inside to see what's happening

                                            >he's about to ask her for help until he sees her grab her sketchbook and run to hold the door to the bedroom open for Anonmare

                                            >no one could help him now

                                            >nothing could save him

                                            >not even the neighbors that could hear everything


                                            >all things considered, Anonstallion's torment was fairly short lived

                                            >not in terms of duration. He was stuck in that room for the rest of the day and most of the night

                                            >most of the next day too, but mainly because he was too exhausted get a passed out Anonmare off of him

                                            >rather it was short lived because it only happened twice more due to it being the last months of the pregnancy

                                            >unfortunately the last time happened to coincide with Anon's first successful date

                                            >one moment he's getting ready to plant a kiss on the mare he'd met at the quarry, the next he's being dragged away again

                                            >he did manage to secure a second date as he was going so it wasn't a total loss

                                            >once the last weeks of the pregnancy rolled around Anonmare was too bedridden to be able to do that again if she wanted

                                            >didn't stop the mood swings, though

                                            >Twilight's concerns had been justified. A check up at the hospital proved that Anonymous was, indeed, carrying multiple foals

                                            >three to be exact

                                            >the news would normally have been cause for celebration with the expecting couple so the staff was very surprised when Anonmare started practically strangling Anonstallion

                                            "THREE!? You put THREE more of him in me!?" she pointed to Anonfilly, who was eating a bundle of well wishing flowers Twilight had brought for them

                                            >"They just express their excitement in their own way." Twilight explained to the concerned nurses

                                            >by now they were at the point where both of them wanted the babies to be out and have this whole thing be a series of memories they can mutually agree to talk about as little as possible

                                            >a wish that was granted on, of all days, Hearth's Warming Eve

                                            >neither of them appreciated that bit of poetic payoff for their plight that Equestria itself had seemed to give them

                                            >especially not Anonmare while she was having to relive childbirth three times in a row

                                            >three foals

                                            >two colts, one filly

                                            >one very tired mare

                                            >and one very interested unicorn observing the delivery and jotting down notes as the doctor and nurses were working

                                            >all three seemed healthy. Nothing out of the ordinary aside from all having very similar green coats and black manes and tails

                                            >"First, let me just say congratulations," Twilight says to the couple once the work is officially done and the foals are bundled up in Anonmare's forelegs

                                            >"All three little foals came out perfectly healthy. Second, don't worry, I've ensured you're all covered for finances while they're growing up so you can focus on taking care of them."

                                            >Anon is listening intently, while Anonmare is still too dazed to do much besides hold onto the babies

                                            >"Now, as for the matter of bringing more of you over. If it works the way you said it did for Fil then we'll need to wait a year or two to see if they," she searches for a fitting word, "wake up here."

                                            "They'll think they're having a dream at first," Anonfilly, technically now Anonfilly the Older, says while looking at the foals, "until they realize they're not waking up and their hands really are hooves now."

                                            >"Right. So just a year and a half or so of taking care of regular infants. You can handle that, right?"

                                            >Anon is a bit apprehensive to answer, but figures that the two of them handled one well enough and having Fil around to help would make things that much easier

                                            "Yeah, I think we can." he nods confidently

                                            >and so they did, surprisingly so

                                            >they'd learned their lessons the first time around and were able to navigate a second parenthood like pros

                                            >Fil was even much more helpful between her usual hellraising, though whether this was some genuine care on her part or just a long con she was playing was anyone's guess

                                            >even Anon's now girlfriend was willing to help out when needed. She took this whole situation quite well, actually. Something about having her own family quirks

                                            >and then the day finally came when one of the foals, a colt, truly woke up

                                            >Fil was the first to notice when she went to give the three their lunch and noticed he was staring very intently at his limbs while moving them around slowly

                                            >she brought the two older ponies to see and help get him through the shock of realizing what's happening

                                            "Hey, hey, don't worry," Anonmare said to the colt, "Yes, this is real. Just take it easy."

                                            >and the colt looked up at them and said his first words

                                            "Why do I have a dick?"


                                            >note jotting, taking readings, adjusting nobs and dials

                                            >Twilight's ad hoc machines whirring and glowing, giving out information only she seemed able to parse

                                            >seated at the center of it were three small green ponies, each looking around at the machinery with varying levels of annoyance

                                            "Are we almost done yet?" one of the three, a colt, chimed up

                                            >"Almost. I should be getting the last bit of information any minute now," Twilight replied, showing not an ounce of surprise at how such a young pony was able to speak so fluently

                                            >at least none anymore. She was more than a little weirded out by it when she first met them after receiving word from Anon that they had started awakening their 'human' selves

                                            "You promise this is the last time we have to do this? I didn't think being in Equestria meant having to be your guinea pig," the filly of the bunch added

                                            >"Cross my heart."

                                            >Anon, Anonymous, and Fil were seated close by, watching and talking amongst themselves

                                            "You guys think they're taking this well? I think Cole's barely keeping it together," Fil whispers and subtly points to the other colt that hasn't spoken up yet

                                            "Well, it's not like everyone was just going to be okay with suddenly leaving their old life behind. We gotta show him some support." Anon says

                                            >a ding chimes out from the main console Twilight was looking over and starts printing out a long paper trail

                                            >Anon and Anonymous take that as their cue to get the colts and filly off the padded bedding

                                            "Thanks, dad," the younger filly says after being placed on the ground

                                            "You don't have to call me that, you know."

                                            >she blushes, still unsure how she's supposed to address the older ponies

                                            >meanwhile, Twilight is loudly pouring over the paper, bringing it over to the cork board she's set up with all the information and ideas she's written down

                                            >more pins and red thread are placed on it as she reads and adds yet more scrawls onto the board

                                            >after a moment she steps back to look over the whole thing

                                            >"I see, I see..."

                                            "Got something?" Anonmare asks her, trying to make sense of the chaos on the board

                                            >"Hm... Nope."

                                            >she looks back and forth between the board and the Anons

                                            >"I've run every test I can think of and used every spell I could find, but nothing strange comes up from any of you. As far as I can tell, you're all normal ponies."

                                            "Normal? We're all basically clones," the second colt finally speaks

                                            >in fact, now she actually had less stable ground to work with since the one of the few common thread between them was now broken

                                            >a female. An actual female specimen!

                                            >...in a colt's body

                                            >"We at least now know for sure that when you two mate more beings from your world are brought over in your childrens' bodies."

                                            >everyone else in the room looked at each other with pensive looks, clearly more hitched up on the implications of what Twilight just said than she is

                                            >"I guess we'll need to move on to the next part of the experiment and see if the same thing happens when you reproduce with native ponies. Now, I'm sure if I put in a formal request we can get some volunteers for you to choose from and-"

                                            >Anonmare's hoof covers Twilight's mouth

                                            "How about we hold off on that for a few years, huh? I'd like some more time before having to push out another kid."

                                            >"Oh. Right, yes, sorry," the unicorn says with an awkward laugh. "We should focus on the new arrivals, anyway, shouldn't we?"

                                            >the two mares look over at Anon and Fil arguing with the younger children about who has the most authority in the house

                                            >Anon naturally says he's the oldest physically and made the rest of the them so it should be him

                                            >the more lively colt were claiming that since Anonymous was the oldest on Earth it should be her

                                            >Fil, naturally, saying it should be her for no reason other than she's the one that's been actually keeping everyone fed

                                            "I need to focus on keeping them from killing each other."


                                            >Twilight says her goodbyes for the day, promises to come back tomorrow after some consultations, and heads back to her room at the local inn

                                            >all the green ponies let out a collective sigh of relief now that all the noise, prodding, and questioning was over for the day

                                            >all except the glum colt

                                            >he was still quiet and just looking down at himself

                                            "Hey, you doing alright there? Need to get something off your chest?"

                                            >Anonstallion is the first to offer him some emotional support. His 'sister' follows suit

                                            "Yeah, something wrong? You can tell us. We're all in the same boat."

                                            >the colt looks up at the two then at everyone else in the room

                                            >a tear wells up in each of his eyes as he lets out his frustration

                                            "Why'd I have to be born as a stupid anon pony!?"

                                            >Anon and the filly are caught off guard, thinking his trouble would have been deeper than just his appearance

                                            >Fil and Anonymous, though, find it hilarious and burst into laughter

                                            "Maybe you shitposted one too many times," the other colt asserts. "At least you got to keep the right parts."

                                            "And why here in some no-where town? Why couldn't you guys have been in Ponyville?"

                                            >the colt continues venting out his frustrations at the situation he's been placed in

                                            >Anonymous and Fil are still laughing among themselves. Anon and the filly exchange looks of slight annoyance

                                            "I mean, it's not like this was an ideal situation for us either," Anon says. "It's going to take some getting used to, but give it a chance at least. You're here at all. Isn't that good on its own?"

                                            >evidently not as the colt just keeps rattling off complaints

                                            >Anonstallion facehoofs and decides to just let him get it out of his system in peace and turns his attention to the other two recent arrivals

                                            "How about you guys? Holding up any better?"

                                            >the other colt shrugs

                                            "Compared to him, sure. It's just a lot to take in still, and it looks like you guys are still as much in the dark about this as we are."

                                            "I'm alright," the filly chimes in. "Just wondering when if, you know, I get to be a normal pony here or..." she trails off

                                            >seems each one's worried about a different part of all this

                                            >it reminds him of when he and Anonmare first showed up just outside town and all the confusion they went through during their first days

                                            >he remembers what helped them at least calm down a little and start figuring thing out

                                            "Have you thought of names yet? We can't just keep calling you guys 'Hey you' and you don't even seem to like the name Fil gave you." he says to the still complaining colt

                                            >this snaps him out of his ranting for a moment

                                            "Huh? Oh. Yeah, no, that name sucks. Give it to her." he points to the other colt

                                            "Me? Why would I want it?"

                                            >the two are sent into a flurry arguing and eventually fighting over who gets saddled with the name Cole

                                            >or maybe they just needed an excuse to let out some anger

                                            >the younger, still unnamed filly watches them tussle with Anon bwfore turning up to him

                                            "Actually, I was hoping you and Anonymous could pick a name for me since you're now, uh, my parents."

                                            >Anonstallion looks down at the filly and sees her looking away in embarrassment

                                            "You're really set on this normal pony stuff, huh?"

                                            >she nods

                                            "Alright, we'll think of something then. Just gotta figure out how ponies chosoe names for their kids."

                                            >he pats her on the back as they turn their attention back to the fight. Anonmare and Fil are now betting on a winner

                                            >once things settled down they all had a roundtable discussion to decide on names

                                            >Anonstallion and Anonmare named the filly World Walker. It wasn't a great name, but she seemed to appreciate that they tried

                                            >the grumpier colt stuck with the name Cole since he couldn't think of anything better for himself that he felt like sticking to (and because he lost the fight)

                                            >the other colt seemed to prefer the nickname Anonmare and Fil had given her, Kiddo

                                            "Just until I figure out what I want to do here. Not gonna pick out a name yet and risk it being totally off about what my talent ends up being."

                                            >when Twilight returned the next day she seemed particularly puzzled

                                            >"I''ve been sending letters about your situation to Princess Celestia for a while asking for advice. She was a bit vague at first, but with this newest batch of data we've come to an agreement."

                                            >everyone seated around her leans in closer in anticipation

                                            >"The best thing for you to do now is to just live your lives. There doesn't seem to be anything more we can gleam until you're ready for the next tests, and you seem to have already settled into living in Equestria pretty well."

                                            >the green ponies all look at each other, mulling over Twlight's suggestion

                                            "So we're really really stuck here, as we are now?" Kiddo speaks up first

                                            >"I'm afraid so. Maybe there's a way to send you back, but this is the first time any of you have asked about it, so we'd need to start looking through magic reco-"

                                            "Oh, no no! No need for that. I was just making sure. I'm alright staying here."

                                            >Cole raises his hoof to get Twilight's attention

                                            >"Yes, Cole?"

                                            "What about making me look different? I'd like to look like anything else than what I am now."

                                            >"Oh! Um, maybe there's some ways to temporarily-

                                            "Does that mean I can be a filly instead?" Kiddo interrupts

                                            >"W-well-"

                                            "Can I be older at least?"

                                            "What about being a pegasus?"

                                            "Can you take me to Ponyville with you?"

                                            >the two back Twilight into a wall as they fire off question after question at her

                                            >she looks over to the older ponies for help, but they're having their own conversation and don't notice her distress

                                            "Looks like we're going with your plan, Walker," Anonmare says to the filly that isn't harassing Twilight

                                            >she's clearly overjoyed, clapping her hooves

                                            "Just don't get kicked out of school on the first day like I did," Fil adds


                                            >the days go by and things settle into their new norm

                                            >Kiddo follows Fil's footsteps often joining in her schemes and causing his own brand of trouble around town

                                            >Cole is usually not far behind, yelling at them that they're being too crass or going against the rules of the show

                                            >and Walker just seems to enjoy every moment she's in Equestria, staring with wide eyed wonder at everything Anonstallion and Anonmare had gotten used to as everyday life

                                            >her willingness to play her role in her new home seemed to also bring out some latent fatherly instincts in Anon that he just hadn't had the chance to use with their first kid

                                            >you'd hardly be able to tell there was anything strange about the two as a father and daughter if the older filly wasn't seemingly always around to make some rude remark about them

                                            >and, as much as she'd like to deny it, Anonmare had also been affected by her time here

                                            >she'd often be the one bringing the household in line when needed. She could even get Fil to behave when she was being too much of a nuisance

                                            "Jeez, did getting railed so many times finally flip your switch to full woman mode or something?" FIl once said after getting chewed out

                                            "Let's see you stay the way you are after having to take care of 4 kids. Bet you'll be begging for help once you have even one." Anonmare retorted, skirting as much as she could around the fact that being a mare meant having a mare's hormones

                                            "Nuh uh, I'm not gay like you guys. I'll be eating mare pussy every day!"

                                            >their shouting match is just one of many that the neighbors have had to grow accustomed to

                                            >similarly, the family got used to Anonstallion's girlfriend, Meadow Prancer, being around much more, especially once she moved in with them

                                            >it became a pretty crowded house, but it was still standing

                                            >and despite the odds it kept standing as days and weeks became months and a year

                                            "Come on, come on! We gotta get there before the castle replaces the library!"

                                            >Cole burst out the door dragging a luggage bag three times his size

                                            "Slow down, Cole! That place isn't going anywhere yet."

                                            >Anonmare steps out of the house with her own travel bag

                                            "Okay, everyone, last call to make sure you packed everything you need."

                                            >Kiddo and Fil follow, Fil saddled with both of their bags since she's gotten tall enough to carry them both

                                            "Pretty sure we do," Kiddo replies. "It's not like we need a lot. Definitely not as much crap as he's bringing with him." She points to Cole's barely held shut luggage

                                            "He really thinks he's getting autographs from everyone in Ponyville." Fil says with a snicker

                                            >Cole naturally gets defensive

                                            "Don't act like you weren't thinking the same thing when you guys first went out there to ask Twilight for help!"

                                            >Anonstallion and Walker are next out, Anon carrying the lion's share of baggage and helping a very noticeably pregnant Meadow Prancer out of the house

                                            "No, we had much more important things to worry about at the time. Just like now."

                                            >"Can't blame him for being excited, right? Little guy's had his heart set on this for months." Prancer says, closing the door behind her

                                            >the group make their way to the train station, happily waved off by the neighbors. No doubt they're looking forward to the peace and quiet

                                            >getting themselves loaded onto the train is an ordeal unto itself with the kids' usual arguing and tussling now being confined to train cabins, but eventually all their bags are sorted, their beds are claimed, and they're chugging down the tracks eastward towards Ponyville

                                            >thankfully, watching the land go by from their window seems to be enough to keep the younger bunch seated in their bed, talking among themselves about what they want to do when they reach their destination

                                            >Walker seems especially hopeful that their visit will last long enough for them to take part in Nightmare Night

                                            "Sounds like we're going to be there a while longer than planned," Anonmare says from the adults' bed, knowing Anon's going to cave in to Walker's request as soon as she asks

                                            "It might do them some good," he says, thinking it over. "Who knows, maybe we'll get lucky and Luna will scare Fil and Cole straight."

                                            >"If they don't get us run out of town first, that is."

                                            >the three share a good laugh, Prancer having to adjust herself when the baby kicks

                                            "I hope we're not cutting it too close." Anonstallion helps her get in a better spot

                                            >"I'm sure we're fine. All you have to worry about is if she'll be green or orange."

                                            "Not yellow?" Anonmare adds

                                            >Prancer thinks for a moment

                                            >"Maybe, actually. But I'm still betting it'll be a coin flip between green like you or orange like me."

                                            >Anonymous and Anon look at each other then back at her

                                            "What's got you so sure about that?" Anon asks

                                            >"Weeeeeeell..." a bead of sweat rolls off her forehead as she looks around nervously

                                            >the two are looking at her pretty inquisitively and moving closer as she forms her answer

                                            >"I guess there's really no point in not just saying it, is there? I'm like... you..."

                                            "...Huh?" they say in unison

                                            >Prancer is much redder in the face as she continues

                                            >"I can't blame you guys for not noticing. I did a pretty good job covering up the signs, huh?" she lets out a nervous laugh and fidgets with her sandy yellow mane. "O-one good magic dye job really does wonders for a g-girl's looks."

                                            "What color was your mane before...?" Anonmare asks

                                            >"Black. Like yours."

                                            >realization washes over Anonymous' face as she pictures Prancer with her own mane

                                            "No!" she says, in as much a whisper as she can to not alert the kids

                                            >Prancer nods, not able to make eye contact

                                            "What? What's going on?" Anonstallion asks, still not getting it

                                            >Meadow Prancer can only stammer and make nervous noises

                                            >it takes Anonmare glaring at her to finally spill the beans

                                            >"I'm wasa/mlpol/userandendedupherelikeyouguys." she blurts out as quick as she can

                                            "Huh?"

                                            >"I'm like you two, but from /mlpol/."

                                            "...The april fool's board?"

                                            >she takes a deep inhale. "Sure, let's go with that."

                                            "What about your cutie mark?" Anonymous points at her mark, a tree with some flowers at its base

                                            >"Most of it washes off, actually. It's just an exclamation mark, like your question marks. You're not mad, are you?" she asks Anonstallion

                                            >he doesn't answer right away

                                            "No. If I can't be mad at Walker for wanting her own identity here then I can't be mad at you."

                                            >Prancer sighs in relief. "Thanks. I promise, that's the only skeleton in my closet."

                                            "Hey, I have a question." Fil speaks up.

                                            >At some point she'd come over and started listening in on their conversation

                                            "If you're like them, shouldn't there also be another guy that showed up here with you as a stallion?"

                                            >"Oh, right, him. He split off to try and do his own thing early on when we got here in a town further east. And by that I mean he tried to act out a rape post and got himself thrown in jail."

                                            >Fil starts laughing and the older ponies slowly join in, alleviating the tension that had built up from their conversation

                                            >it seems this bunch is going to be alright