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/NEET/ Mini-Floorb
By BlondieAnonCreated: 2020-10-22 21:31:33
Updated: 2021-01-09 17:46:56
Expiry: Never
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1.
"Floor! Floor, you little dork, what did you do to make us break the data cap again?!"
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2.
>You were fine downloading a few roms
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3.
>Until your phone buzzed
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4.
>Your last courtesy month has been officially used up
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5.
>You know you use maybe 45% per month if you aren't filling your hard drives
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6.
>The little nerd pushes you up to around 90% per month if she's actively playing those lame multiplayer games or downloading anime to watch and then immediately delete
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7.
>You glance around at your desk, and then under it
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8.
>As tiny as she is, it's a wonder that she can use a laptop at all but tiny hooves meeting a mechanical keyboard has allowed her to shitpost with the greatest of ease
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9.
>Sadly that's the only thing she seems to have an affinity for these days
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10.
>You still remember when you adopted her
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11.
>She was barely the size of a kitten, and didn't like using her words
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12.
>But she was affectionate as all and didn't ever break any rules
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13.
>Until she discovered the internet
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14.
>Then she went from an adorable filly to an increasingly antisocial
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15.
>She's always viewed you as a big brother
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16.
>But thanks to those damned Japanime cartoon pictures, she keeps acting like you've escalated into some forbidden romance
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17.
>You wouldn't trade her for the world but you've yet to fall to that level of perversion to romance a tiny talking horse
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18.
"FLOOR."
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19.
>Floor Bored, the one and only, is splayed out on her side with the laptop off
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20.
>She looks dead
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21.
>You nudge her with your foot
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22.
"You ain't fooling me this time. I got that email not five minutes ago."
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23.
>Nothing
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24.
>The first time she pulled this, you did go into a genuine panic
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25.
>But now you're tempted to cremate her and be done with it
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26.
"Dang... she's really dead this time... I guess I better make use of her body while it's still warm..."
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27.
>Hearing that, her tail flickers
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28.
"AHA, YOU LIVE YET!"
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29.
>That sets her off
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30.
>Her tired eyes burst open and she looks at you like a deer in the headlights of an 18-wheeler
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31.
>"I DIDN'T MEAN TO, I DIDN'T KNOW THEY WERE FLAC FORMAT!"
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32.
"LIES! DAMNABLE LIES! COME HERE!"
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33.
>You lunge down to grab at her, but bang your head on the corner of your desk
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34.
>Floorb scampers off, scurrying like a roach until she's under your bed
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35.
>She used to gallop and trot around but now she always hunkers down when she's moving
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36.
>You caught her, once, mimicking Solid Snake down to repeating everything she heard and going 'hmmm' after examining everything from a sock to an empty candy wrapper
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37.
>You slip out of your chair and hop onto your mattress, leering over the corners
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38.
>If you can keep quiet, she'll usually think you've wandered off somewhere
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39.
>She gives you a lot of credit for some things, like keeping her fed and entertained, but she seems to think that you have the intelligence of an early PS2 mook
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40.
>It takes a minute, but you see an off-white snout pop out from under the bed
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41.
>A few sniffs
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>A gruff giggle
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43.
>"Colonel... I lost 'im. Proceeding with the mission."
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44.
>Belly sliding against the carpet, Floor squints hard and crawls out from under the bed
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45.
>Every few inches she stops to rub herself against the carpet
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46.
>You really don't want to give her The Talk but you get the feeling that it'll come sooner than later
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47.
>You wait for her to move out another few inches before you lower your hand toward her
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48.
>With a scream that only a scary skeleton could give, you grab her flank
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49.
>The pint-sized pony matches the scream with her own and leaps up, curling into herself
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50.
>Her mane an even bigger mess than usual, she peeks up at you with one exposed eye
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51.
"You really gotta be careful with what you grab."
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52.
>She nods
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53.
"If this happens next month too, we're gonna get charged extra. That's not small money."
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54.
>Her gaze stays on you, not budging an inch
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55.
"That means less snack money for you."
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56.
>The little dork whines out something that's surely a perfectly valid, sensible excuse as to why she lost control of how much she was downloading
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57.
"What was that?"
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58.
>She mumbles out something
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>And coughs
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60.
>"...er....sorry..."
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>She doesn't exactly sound sorry
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62.
>You go limp and melt into the bed
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63.
>Your knuckles rest on the carpet
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64.
>She used to follow rules and instructions far better
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65.
>Is this the equivalent of pony puberty or something?
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66.
>A few minutes of closing your eyes, you feel something wet rub against your hand
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>It's her tongue
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68.
>"I'm sorry... I was making you a rar of audiobooks."
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69.
>She curls up around your hand and wrist
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70.
>You get the feeling it's far more than that
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71.
>But it's probably partially true
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72.
"Yeah..."
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73.
>Your reply is half-muffled by cushioning fabric
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74.
>Good thing you live alone, aside from her
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75.
>You relax, having lost the will to continue with your own archiving
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76.
>"Hey... Anon?"
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77.
>She sounds as quiet as ever
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78.
"Mmmhmmph?"
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>You don't even lift your face away from the comfortable pitch darkness
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80.
>"...can I still have snacks?"
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81.
"Mmmph."
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82.
>You're too damn soft with her sometimes
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83.
>"Sweet."
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84.
>You can hear her whisper to herself
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85.
>The licking resumes again
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86.
>You can't prove it but you think she has an ulterior motive for doing it
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87.
>"Anoooooon..."
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88.
"Mmmmph."
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89.
>"Are you still my bf?"
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90.
>She's still on about the 'bf/gf' thing
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91.
>You don't particularly dislike the idea but it still seems odd since you effectively raised her
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92.
>She hasn't been subtle with the hints lately either
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93.
>She once sent you a message containing shortstack porn
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>While you were at work
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>With a message of 'do u thnk i could do that lolz'
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>She is a horrible typist
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>But her words per minute rate is astonishing given how tiny she is
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98.
>Rather than dignify that question with an answer, you drag your head up and stare at your computer
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99.
"If I say 'yes', will you stop downloading three hundred gigs, only to delete it all within the same hour?"
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>You hear a nervous giggle
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>"L... love overcomes all trials..."
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102.
>So that was her way of saying 'no'
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>You start to raise her hand up so it can rejoin your body
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104.
>Floorb shrieks and glomps onto it as tightly as she can
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105.
>Treating her like a dollop of slime, you whip your hand around
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106.
>To no avail
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>She's gripping onto you with the strength of gorilla glue
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108.
>More worried about accidentally bonking her against something than getting her off your hand, you quit after a minute and just set your hand down on the bed
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109.
>Dizzy but successful, Floor releases your hand and sluggishly drags herself to your side
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110.
>"I'm sorry... I'm a bad pony."
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>That she is
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>You huff, unable to think of how you can help implement a better rule system
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113.
>Those internet may-mays are starting to warp her brain
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>What brain she has left
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115.
>"I'm a naaaughty pony..."
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>Floor whispers, rubbing her head against your side
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117.
>Here it comes
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118.
>"Punish me, onii-chan..."
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119.
>Ok, that's it
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>You slap your hand down on the lower half of her body
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121.
>She's still growing, but as of now she can still find a way to curl up in your hands if she's a tight enough ball
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122.
"You... are powering for a showering."
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>While the pseudo-spank causes her to imitate some sort of hentai horse noise, the threat causes her to sort herself out
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>"S-sorry, Anon... I'll be good. I'll send an email next time I want something bigger than a single song."
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125.
"Thank you."
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>You want to get up and get back to things but you can feel her nuzzle against you
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127.
>She's slowly assimilating your hand into her fluffy body
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128.
>"Let's take a nap... and once we're done thinking about it, we can have some ice cream to celebrate me having learned my lesson for today."
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129.
"Yeah... sure."
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130.
>You want to be mad at her but you can't
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131.
"But if I wake up and you're on that school calculator you call a laptop, I'm using the oatmeal shampoo."
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132.
>"You got funny fetishes... that's ok, I do too."
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>When did she even learn that word!?
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134.
>Fucking internet
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135.
>Floor used to be a good little pony
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136.
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>You don't sleep for too long
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>It's the curse of the weekends; so much free time and chances to do anything
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>So the best thing your body can stick to is sleeping
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140.
>Floor tends to sleep entire days away as is
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>She has her energetic bursts of energy, though
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142.
>Last time she did was when you introduced her to the original Power Rangers
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143.
>Rather than making a mask, she made a turtle shell and blended the blue ranger with Leonardo from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
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>She really was such a sweet thing before she learned about sexual things
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>She still is
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>You grumble something about turtles when you finally come to
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>Evidently in your sleep you went from laying on your stomach to laying on your back
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>You feel your sides and have no signs of tiny pony
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149.
"...Floor?"
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>You don't feel anything under you so you didn't turn over and squish her
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>Your back creaks as you sit up
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>You didn't want to check, but you do
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153.
>Floor's laying between your legs
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>Face mashed into your crotch
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>You normally stick to boxers and a shirt when at home
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>You didn't really think anything of it
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>You might need to change that
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158.
"...Floor. Floor!"
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>You watch Floorb visibly shudder
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>And hear her inhale as hard as she possibly can
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>She nuzzles her muzzle up against one of your boys
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162.
"Come on, wake up. Ice cream waits for no mare."
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>She muffles out some sort of excuse, shaking her head back and forth
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>A little embarrassed by her attempt to motorboat your lads, you scoot back
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>You see an intoxicated Floorb shaking her face back and forth
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>She opens her mouth wide, extends her tongue
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...
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>And opens one eye
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>Not only is her mouth empty
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>Not only is the warmth and scent of you gone
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>But she sees you glaring down at her
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>She stays in that pose
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>Unblinking
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>Unmoving
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>A strand of saliva drips down from her tongue
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>You purse your lips and sigh
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"Have a good nap, did you?"
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>No response
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>She seems completely married to the concept of acting like a statue
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>Like maybe if she does it long enough, she'll convince you that she wasn't going at it with you
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"You know, you shouldn't do that."
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>No change in movement
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"How long were you actually sleeping, anyway?"
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>Not a single budge on her part
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>Another strand of saliva drips from the corner of her mouth and onto the bed
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186.
>You get that she's a growing pony, but this is just uncomfortable
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187.
"Alright... you stay there. I'm going up and having some shebert. Might even have a Pocky stick or two thrown in, like what you see in those anime shows..."
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>You turn and get up
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>Less than two steps away from the bed, you see a blur of black and white zip past you, down the hallway and into the kitchen
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>One of these days you're gonna understand her
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>By the time you reach the kitchen, you see Floorb prancing around the fridge door in some sort of ritualistic dance
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192.
>"Semenai de! Kesanai de! Makenai de!"
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>If she actually made an effort to pick up another language skill, you'd be impressed
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>But you recognize those lyrics
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"Oh hey, you're up! You know, I had the funniest thought that you were napping with your mouth open. and your eye open. And not at all actually napping."
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196.
>Floor stops her dance, peeks over her shoulder to see you, and slowly gets back down on all four hooves
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>"O-oh. Good morning Anon! Y-yeah, f-funny thing huh..."
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>She's a terrible liar
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>You think she does it just to save face for her own sake
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>You don't have any friends so it's not like you'll ever tell anyone about all of her... moments
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>You shake your head and scoff
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202.
"Crazy thing... I shudder to think what would happen if I didn't wake up when I did."
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203.
>The munchkin pony laughs a loud, awkward, uncomfortable laugh as you set up the snacks
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204.
>"Y-yeah, imagine that! I mean, what? Me? No, I'd never imagine that! No, never. Certainly not because it's you, big bro!"
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>You choose not to answer her
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>You do have a few boxes of Pocky kept in reserve
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>Far above and beyond anything that could resemble her reach
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>You think that's a reason why she never really rebels against you
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>You've heard her screech and reee before, mostly at whatever is taunting her on her computer
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>But she hasn't ever done that to you
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>Except that one time
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>You left her in a pet carrier for an entire eight hours when you went out for work as punishment
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>When you came back, she was comotose
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>The only thing that revived her was one of those hazelnut mochi blobs and the promise of watching Inuyasha
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"Alright... chocolate or strawberry?"
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>"STRAWB--wait, what type of sherbet do we have?"
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"Orange."
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>"NO, CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATIZE ME, CAP'N!"
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>That gets a snort out of you
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>She meshes really well with you, humor-wise
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>She meshes well with you on a ton of things, really
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"Alright, two orders of the good stuff! Now head back to..."
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>You try to show her the bowls and she's already gone
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>"I'M ALREADY HERE, LET'S WATCH SOME STUFF!"
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>God damn she's fast if she wants to be
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>You walk back to your room and see her sitting in place
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>The smile she's giving you is... odd
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228.
"What are you doing?"
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229.
>"Colon three."
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"Wat."
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>"Colon three."
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"Wat."
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233.
>"Colon three."
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234.
"Wat."
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235.
>"ICE CREAM PIE ME ALREADY DADDY!"
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236.
"Oh God damn it Floor."
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237.
>You sit down on the floor and set her helping down first
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238.
>Rather than a human-sized bowl, it's a tiny plate that has a scoop and a half of shebert
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239.
>From a tea spoon
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240.
>You also stuck two tiny segments of Pocky stick into it
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>One with chocolate
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242.
>The other with strawberry
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243.
>She lets out a joyful, awkward scream when she sees it
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244.
>"BOTH!? I LOVE YOU!"
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245.
>You watch her cease her screaming only when it's full of orange goodness
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246.
>It lasts for maybe three entire chomps before she falls over, fainting goat style
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247.
"Brainfreeze, huh."
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248.
>She knows better, she just lacks self control
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249.
>You shudder to think what would happen to her if you were really sick or unable to do much
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250.
>You were sick once
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>You never saw such a tiny thing cry so much
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252.
"So, we got Death Note to finish... and Chobits."
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253.
>Your answer is a chilled whimper
by BlondieAnon
by BlondieAnon
by BlondieAnon
by BlondieAnon
by BlondieAnon