Sundere


                                            >School is out for the day and you're merrily skipping towards the exit when Sunset Shimmer grabs your shoulder.

                                            >"Whoa there, 'Non!"

                                            "NOPE, GOT PLACES TO BE!"

                                            >You don't, except NOT HERE.

                                            >School is over; you'll be damned if you stay on campus a second longer than required by truancy laws or whatever the hell they use as a legal basis to keep your ass in the seat.

                                            >Sunset rolls her eyes, but matches your pace.

                                            >"Got a date or something?" she teases. "I mean, you don't, right? Because that would be kinda beyond what I can comprehend."

                                            "Nah, just porn."

                                            >Not a bad idea, actually. It's been a few days.

                                            >"Okay, TMI, Anon," Sunset sighs. "I know I'm like, your only friend here, tranny, but -"

                                            "Don't call me that."

                                            >"Why not? You're a transfer student, right?"

                                            >You take a swing at her, which she easily ducks, just like she has all those times before.

                                            "You know that's not what -"

                                            >"Yeah, I know," Sunny laughs, jogging up ahead and holding the door open for you. "Ladies first!"

                                            "Anywhere else, and this would be considered bullying. You know that, right?"

                                            >"Nope, it wouldn't! Because I'm your friend, remember? I'm allowed to tease you!"

                                            >She smiles as you jog past her.

                                            >Well, yeah, maybe she is allowed, but it's a two-way street.

                                            "Know what, Sunny? I think I'll go with some hentai today."

                                            >You skip down the steps, followed closely by your friend.

                                            >"Ewww! Stop!"

                                            "Maybe something involving vampires or werewolves or something. I've always wanted to stick my dick in a mythological creature."

                                            >"I'm a vampire!"

                                            "What."

                                            >You spin around to see what kind of prank she's pulling now and nearly fall.

                                            >Momentum is a bitch.

                                            >"I said, I'm a vampire," Sunset repeats, looking away suddenly. "I mean, not that I'd even let you get close to me or anything, but, you know, just a for-your-information kind of thing, so -"

                                            "Bullshit. You're standing in the sun right now."

                                            >She takes two steps back, until the shadow of the building hides her from the light.

                                            >"Um, sunscreen?"

                                            "Not buying it. Now hurry up, if you're not going to let me go, then come over to my place. You said you'd help me go over those math problems -"

                                            >"Wait, just let me..."

                                            >Sunset turns away, grunting wordlessly as she struggles to pull something out of her backpack - without taking it off.

                                            >"There!"

                                            >She spins around, a flashy pair of sunglasses covering her eyes, a collapsible umbrella in her hand.

                                            >"You're right, 'Non," Sunny smirks, pressing the stud on the umbrella... once... twice... okay, third time's a charm... no, it's just a piece of junk.

                                            >BAMPFH!

                                            >Okay, fourth time was the charm.

                                            "I know I'm right. You promised to help me, so don't try to get out of it now. Or, you know, just let me go home in peace."

                                            >"No, I mean, you're right, I'm not wearing any sunscreen, that's why -"

                                            "And you're not a vampire."

                                            >She pouts, but doesn't argue.

                                            >You don't have time for this.

                                            >Only three steps later, you can hear the clop of her heavy boots chasing after you.

                                            >"FINE!" she snarls, stepping up beside you. Still wearing the damned sunglasses and holding the umbrella to shield her from the sun. "But you BETTER clean up your room. If I see just ONE of your dirty magazines -"

                                            "Don't have any."

                                            >"Why pretend, 'Non?" she asks. "You're the biggest perv I know."

                                            "And why would you think that?"

                                            >Not that she isn't right...

                                            >"One, because you're a guy -"

                                            >Point.

                                            >" - and two, because you're you."

                                            >Match.

                                            "Meh."

                                            >You shrug.

                                            "Still the truth, though."

                                            >"I can't -"

                                            "Get everything off the internet."

                                            >"Okay, nevermind," Sunny sighs, probably regretting bringing it up. Or being born. One of those. "I can believe that."

                                            "So are you going to give up pretending you're a vampire?"

                                            >"I'm not pretending!"

                                            >You stop walking - she takes two-and-a-half more steps before realizing you're no longer beside her.

                                            "Well, I guess I can't let you into my house, then."

                                            >"And why not!?" she demands, turning slightly and glaring angrily.

                                            "Because you're a VAMPIRE."

                                            >Sunny sighs loudly and pulls off her glasses - just so you can see her rolling her eyes, you suspect.

                                            >"Okay, fine! You caught me! I'm not actually a vampire. Just a unicorn that took on a human form."

                                            >You continue to stare.

                                            >After a few seconds of fidgeting, she collapses the umbrella and stuffs it into her backpack.

                                            >"Let's just get this -"

                                            "That's cool."

                                            >She glances up, giving you a are-you-seriously-this-retarded? look.

                                            >"What now, 'Non," she sighs.

                                            "Oh, nothing. Just... "

                                            >"What?"

                                            >You shrug again.

                                            "Well, I didn't have my heart set on vampires. A pony is fine, too."