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(By Anonstigator)
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>Be Anon, best babysitter in Equestria
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>Be done babysitting the living tornado known as Flurry Heart
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>Seriously how did she get a chainsaw to run rampant with?
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>Ponies here couldn’t handle anything sharper than a spoon without freaking out
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>Doesn’t matter because Princess Candy Ass sure does pay good
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>20 bits an hour for 6 hours a day 4 days a week
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>You were even able to afford an apartment in the Crystal Kingdom to make your commute shorter
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>Time to get your pay for the day
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>Walking with Flurry cradled in your arm you make your way to Cadence’s room
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>You get a few odd stares as you walk down the halls, you always do
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>Probably because these ponies know just how much havoc Flurry can wreak
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>Ah well, doesn’t really matter
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>Arriving at the door you’re about to knock when you hear the faintest noise inside
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>Straining to hear you put your ear against the door, but to no avail
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>The movies made this look much simpler
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>Giving up you knock on the door
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> A muffled “Just a minute” can be heard
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>Cadence must have been shouting her ass off for you to hear that
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>A couple seconds pass before the door sings open revealing Cadence looking a little disheveled
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>”Ah Anonymous, is it that time already?”
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“’Fraid so Princess, hate to part with the little tyke but she needs her mama too.”
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>”As always Anonymous I am ever grateful you look after Flurry. Your pay as usual.”
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>Cadence simultaneously levitates Flurry from your arm and deposits a purse of bits into your hand.
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>You open up the bag to check the bits
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>Well not really, Cadence was always good on her pay
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>It just felt nice to see the fruits of your labor
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“Yup, all there Princess. As always, it’s a pleasure.”
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>You nod your head goodbye before being stopped by Princess Cadence
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>”Anonymous, wait a moment if you would. There is something I would like to ask of you.”
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>Cadence’s tone didn’t sound too happy; shit did she want to fire you?
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>She didn’t find out about how much danger Flurry’s been in did she?
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>Shit just deny, deny, deny
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“Sure Princess what did you want to ask?”
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>Okay going well, just don’t spill your spaghetti
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>”It would be best if we talked about this in private.”
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>SHIT
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>She is SO gonna fire you
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>without waiting for confirmation she turns around and walks into her room
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>taking a deep breath you follow
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>Looking inside her room Cadence had obviously hastily tried to tidy up
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>It was in worse shape than she was
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>Cadence was shuffling some paperwork on her desk and without turning spoke
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>”Anonymous have you noticed anything out of the ordinary lately?”
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>Immediately your mind is flooded with incidents from just this week alone
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>There was when Flurry got abducted by pirates
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>Rampaging Flurry with a chainsaw
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>Fluttershy getting kidnaped by a Chimaera at a picnic she, Flurry, and you were having
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“No”
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> Keep it simple, that’ll keep you together
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>”Are you sure, nopony acting suspicious or anything?”
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“Not that I’ve seen.”
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>Cadence eyes you and you begin to sweat
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>Finally after what feels like forever she speaks
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>”If you say so Anonymous, I’m sorry to have kept you. Please Enjoy your weekend, I’ll see you back on Tuesday.”
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>What?
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>That actually worked?
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>As if on auto-pilot you exit the room and head back to your apartment for the night
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>Damn you’re good
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>Be Princess Cadenza Mi Amore
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>Be rocking Flurry’s crib while thinking about what Anonymous just said
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>He hasn’t noticed his growing following?
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>Has he not seen how his follower’s gather around his apartment every night and chant?
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>Can one stallion be so thick skulled?
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>You gaze wanders to a picture of your loving hubby Shining Armor
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>You remember how long it took for him to notice your love for him
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>but this is different
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>The Princesses told you to keep an eye on Anonymous
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>To see if he is ready to join the pantheon
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>Even your niece Twilight was getting antsy
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>In terms of shear mental capacity he rivals Celestia herself
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>Power wise, he’s able to keep up with Flurry and not even you could do that
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>There are just a couple of problems
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>For one, he seems to either have no knowledge of his following or actively ignores it
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>A Princess must treat their followers with the respect and loyalty their followers have for them
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>Secondly is his following with the other races
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>For the longest time, the other races of Equis remained silent on additions to the pantheon
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>But every day you received more and more petitions to have Anonymous sent to his “rightful place” among whatever race the sender was
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>Some of them were even written in pencil, meaning they came from the highest authorities in their respective nation
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>If Equestria acknowledged Anonymous as belonging to the pantheon the other races might feel as if Anonymous was stolen from them
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>You shuddered at the thought
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>the name calling would be vicious
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>It might even erupt into another pillow war
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>You glance back down at the picture of Shinny
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>You need to rest, it’s been a long day
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>Be Anon, chilling in Casa de Anon
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>It’s been a week so you’re treating yourself
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>Apple Cider, cause it’s the closest shit to alcohol they got in this kiddy place
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>You take a swig, its tart and has a slight aftertaste
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>Not as good as the shit from Sweet Apple Acers, but you aren’t paying the inflated import tax on that.
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>One thing you miss about home is the ways to distract yourself after a long day at work
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>Maybe you should go for a walk
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>Nah, Cadence was worrying about suspicious ponies so you should probably play it safe
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>Then again the meanest thing you’ve encountered, outside your escapades with Flurry, was a mare who tried to cuddle you without asking
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>Your thoughts are interrupted by a knock on your door
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>Opening it you see one of your neighbors
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>A crystal pony named Brilliant Gleam
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>The naming conventions of this place were hard to get used to
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“Hey Gleam, your faucet leaking again?’
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>About a week after you moved here you became the go to handyman when you showed everyone you knew how to unclog a toilet
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>She shakes her head
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>”N-no not this time.”
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>Is she blushing, it’s hard to tell with how translucent crystal ponies are
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>There’s an awkward scilence for a couple of seconds
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“So… what brings you to my doorstep then?’
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>”Oh, right.”
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>Okay now she is definitely blushing
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>You swear one of these days you’ll die of a heart attack
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>Brilliant Gleam pulls out what looks to be a letter
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>”This came for you just now.”
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>taking the letter away you look for the sender’s address
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>Huh that’s strange, no sender
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>you look up to try and ask Brilliant who the sender was, but by then she’s already gone
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“Whelp little letter, looks like it’s just you and me.”
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>Sighing, you head back inside to read the letter
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>Opening it you’re not greeted by pony anthrax and instead a card
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>A Father’s day card
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>There aren’t any signatures on it so you can’t figure out who sent the card still
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>Is it Father’s day today?
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>You go check the calendar to check and sure enough the day is marked with a pre-highlighted holiday marker
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>You aren’t actually a father but you might as well be considering how childish these ponies are
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>seriously you said hell once and half of Ponyville gasped
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>the other half fainted
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>you pin the card to your fridge and decide to continue with your nighttime walk idea
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>Be Brilliant Gleam, high priestess of the cult of Dadnonymous Crystal Empire branch
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>You are over the moon
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>The All Father accepted your offering of thanks
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>You can only hope that it ends up on the sacred alter known only as “The Fridge”
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>You must let the followers know
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>The Ceremony will proceed with the All Fathers blessing
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>The time is right
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>You exit your apartment
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>Be Anonymous about 2 hours later sitting in the park
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>It may be night, but with how clear the sky is, the moon provides enough light to see
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>With nothing but the crisp night air to distract you, you begin to think
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>Why is everything here so kid friendly?
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>No booze, no sharp corners, nothing
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>Violence is extremely tame here and a scrape larger than your pinky nail is considered a life threatening injury
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>Was it always like this?
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>Do you even want to know?
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>If anyone were to know it’d be one of the Princesses
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>When you first arrived here and noticed the Kindergarten mindset you asked Celestia that same question
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>She just looked at you like she was rebooting and then moved on
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>Didn’t even acknowledge your question
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>Something’s up here but you’re not quite sure what
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>You’re interrupted from your inner monologue by the smell of something burning
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>You panic for a second looking around before seeing some ponies sitting on logs roasting marshmallows
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>you should probably head over there
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>They’ll need adult supervision
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>how’d they even start a fire?
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>Getting closer you notice some familiar faces
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>There are some of your neighbors, including Brilliant
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>There’s the Baker across the street from the castle
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>Are they singing Kumbayah? Or the pony equivalent at least
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>this is gonna be interesting
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>Be High Priestess Brilliant Gleam
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>The ceremony is in full swing
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>The sacred chants are reaching their peak
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>The flames are roasting the sacrifices nicely
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> When disaster strikes
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>Brother Knead strayed too close to the sacred pyre and has his hoof engulfed in flame
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>He wails in pain but none of the other followers intervene, lest they themselves be engulfed
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>When suddenly, as if by miracle, All Father Anonymous himself descends on brother Knead and extinguishes the fire with one simple kiss
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>You address the followers
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>”Truly this day is blessed; the All Father himself has descended from his lair to save brother Knead from his own demise.”
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>Cheers ring out from the followers as Anonymous gives a nod and sits
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>He is here to moderate the ceremony obviously
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>We must offer him a sacrifice
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>Be Anonymous
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>The Baker Knead Love had a little singe on his hoof from accidently sticking it in the campfire
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>You kissed it to ease him and pet his back to calm his crying
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>” *sniff* th-thank you Anon, it r-really hurt.”
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>Ugh your one weakness, sad ponies
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“Hey it’s alright Knead, just trying to help.”
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>How could crystal even get singed?
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>Petting Knead let you know the crystal they’re made of is really strong
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>Before you can continue down this line of thinking Brilliant walks up to you and offers you a smore
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“Aw thanks Brilliant that’s very kind of you”
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>You take the smore from her and begin to munch down
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>It’s loaded with sugar, like everything else here, but it’s good
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>”You’re welcome Anon, anything for a friend.”
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>Brilliant beams a smile at you
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>You pass the rest of the night singing campfire songs with the Ponies before bidding them goodnight
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>Taking a walk was your best decision yet
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>Be Cadence waking up the next day
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>Today you must report to Celestia on whether Anonymous is right to join the pantheon
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>Celestia herself is arriving in order to hear you reasoning
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>You’ve prepared as much as you could but it’s not enough
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>You remember what happened when the last acolyte to ascend wasn’t ready
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>Poor Sunset
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>But Anonymous isn’t an acolyte, he’s…
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>Frankly you aren’t sure what he is
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>He seems to not follow any of the rules
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>No matter how much harm comes to him, he never seems to notice
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>He seems to be able to keep up with Celestia mentally, if not surpass her in some areas
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>Areas such warfare, logic puzzles and many more
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>Is he… something more?
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>Before you can continue down this line of thought a knock shakes you back to reality
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“C-come in”
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>The door swings open to reveal
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>CELESTIA?
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“P-p-princess, how nice of you to drop by, I-I-I was just preparing…”
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>”Silence”
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>you immediately snap your mouth shut
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>”Follow me”
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>Without another word she turns and walks away
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>You know better than to keep the princess waiting so you levitate only the most important documents and follow
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>Harmony protect you
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>Be Anon, waking up around midday
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>Hey it’s your day off; you can wake up when you wanna
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>Pour yourself a big bowl of frosted Luna-O’s
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>You’re 99% certain its pure sugar but damn if it doesn’t taste good
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>As you munch you begin to recall last night
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>Man that was a fun campfire party
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>You were surprised that many ponies could stay up that late
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>Most were clocked out at 9pm exactly
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>Some of the “late night” establishment such as taverns stayed open until about 10pm and even then pony’s eyes were drooping
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>That bonfire party lasted until midnight at least
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>You had more s’mores and cider that night than any other time in your life
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>Still why didn’t Brilliant tell you about that party last night when she delivered your card?
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>She didn’t even tell you she was going
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>From your, admittedly limited, experience parties like that were a whole town kind of deal
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>Maybe the crystal ponies were just warry of you
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>After all they lived up here with a tyrant for centuries
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>At least what this world considered a tyrant
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>Still living in fear tends to make people distrust outsiders
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>You finish your cereal and go to put your dishes away
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>After that you go to check your mail
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>Down in the lobby there isn’t a soul to be seen
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>Not even the receptionist is behind her desk
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>You check your mail to see a copy of the newspaper and some miscellaneous letters
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>Unfurling the paper you see the front page headline
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>”PRINCESSES CELESTIA AND LUNA TO VISIT CRYSTAL EMPIRE TODAY”
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>Huh so the princesses are visiting, maybe you should go say hi
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>After all, it’s been some time since you saw them in person
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>Just because it’s your day off doesn’t mean you can’t visit the castle
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>And with that you head out to the castle
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>Be Brilliant Gleam, waking up with a splitting headache
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>The fog of your mind begins to fade as the events of last night’s ritual begins to come back to you
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>The chants, the sacrifices, brother Knead nearly dying, then…
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>Then your lord came and saved him
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>Truly he is the most benevolent of deities
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>But the past is the past, and you must prepare for more ceremonies
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>With the new chants passed down from your lord, the next gathering shall be even better
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>But that can wait too, for you must resume your civilian life until next you meet
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>For now you are no longer Brilliant Gleam the High Priestess
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>No, now as you slip back into the hum drum of civility, you are Brilliant Gleam the Royal Guardsmare
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>And on this shift, you are faced with both a blessing, and a curse
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>For you and your squad are to look after Flurry Heart
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>Anonymous give you the strength to look after his chosen disciple
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>It’s going to be a long day
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>Be Cadence
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>Be currently sweating your cutie mark off
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>Not only is Celestia here to judge your assessment, but her sister Luna is here too
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>Should they be displeased with your findings you could very well face banishment… or worse
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>Celestia and Luna were currently pouring over the folder of notes and letters you had compiled on Anonymous
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>They hadn’t yet asked any questions of you but that made you all the more anxious
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>Finally after what felt like ages the silence was broken
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>”Hmm, quite remarkable don’t you think sister.”
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>”INDEED ANONYMOUS SHOWS MUCH PROMISE”
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>Oh thank Harmony
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>”But…”
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>oh no
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>”… there is a problem with his… popularity… with the other races”
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>”AN ASTUTE OBSERVATION SISTER DEAR, BUT HOWEVER SHALL WE REMEDY THIS SITUATION.”
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>”Well why don’t we pose this conundrum to our gracious host”
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>Both princesses turned their heads towards you with a look that can only be considered malevolent
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“O-of course.”
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>You swallow saliva nervously and continue
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“P-perhaps we could… discus with the other races about how to handle his ascension?”
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>you tried to phrase it like a statement but your voice betrayed you
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>They both stare at you for a minute
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>”An excellent idea, don’t you think Luna?”
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>”I DO SISTER, TRULY REMARKABLE.”
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>Wait what?
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>”After all most of these races seem extremely serious about making their case, why don’t we hear them out.”
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>Is… is this actually working? Are you actually not gonna get thrown into Tartarus?
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>”And who better to put this plan into action than the mare who suggested it.”
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>Oh sweet Harmony
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>So that’s their plan
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“Of course Celestia, I would be honored”
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>You bow as it’s the only thing you can do
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>Suddenly a knock at the door draws all of your attentions
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>”You may enter”
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>A guardpony pokes their head from behind the door
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>”Sorry to interrupt your highnesses, but Anonymous is here to see you.”
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>”Ah wonderful, please send him in.”
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>Oh merciful Harmony this day just keeps getting better and better
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>Be Anon
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>Currently be waiting for the guard to come back
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>You’re getting a bit impatient but a small explosion across the room draws your attention
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>The doors are blown off their hinges when a familiar ball of energy comes barreling towards you
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>Flurry slams into your gut knocking the wind out of your sails
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“Oof … hey Flurry good to see you”
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>You strain to regain your breath as Flurry just cutely chuckles in your arms
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“Say shouldn’t there be someone watching you right now?”
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>As the words leave your lips a squad of guardponies comes rushing in to the waiting room
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>”Has anyone seen Flurry Heart?”
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“Yeah… over here”
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>You wave over the guards to come collect the little rugrat
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>”Ah Anon, thanks for the help.”
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>A guardsmare trots up to you, she seems strangely familiar
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>as you start to hand of Flurry she grabs on to your sleeve and won’t let go
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>How does she do that with just hooves?
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“Now, now flurry it’s been fun but you’ve got to go with the guards”
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>Flurry shakes her head rapidly
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>”Un-uh, Non-non”
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>You give the guardsmare an apologetic smile and turn your attention back to Flurry
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“Come on Flurry, now is not the time. It really was nice but I’m here to see your momma.”
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>Flurry just grips even tighter at your words
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>”He’s right Flurry it’s your lunchtime, and then a nap. Doesn’t that sound nice?”
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>Oh boy, lunchtime with Flurry was always a chore; it must be hell on these tiny ponies
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>”NON-NON, NON-NON”
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>Flurry is really starting to get on your nerves
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>Time to break out the big guns
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“Flurry, go eat lunch with the nice mare… now.”
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>It always makes you feel bad to use your “dad voice” but it’s for the best
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>As you’re speaking you see some of the ponies around you flinch, and Flurry stops screaming
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>Flurry looks at you and
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>Oh good god no… she’s gonna cry
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>Her eyes well up and…
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>”W-W-W-WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.”
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>Oh god, oh fuck, this is bad. Like up shitscreek bad.
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>Think Anon think
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“Uh… uh…Hey Flurry after I’m done talking with you mom… uh we can go get some pasteries.”
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>Really faggot that’s the best you can come up with
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>Shut up brain it was you who came up with it
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>While you’re having an internal monologue you begin to notice the crying suddenly fades into sniffling
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>”P-pwoma?”
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“Yeah Flurry I promise.”
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>Flurry, still somewhat sad, releases her death grip on your sleeve and gets on the back of the Guardsmare
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>”Thanks Anon we were having a lot of trouble handling her.”
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“Sure, no problem.”
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>As the guard carries Flurry on her back, Flurry turns and waves at you
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>”Bye, Non-non”
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>You give her a small wave as they exit the now destroyed doorway
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>From the opposite door another guard enters
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>”Anonymous, the princesses will see you now. Please follow me.”
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>That’s your cue
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>Time to go say hi
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>And maybe tell Cadence about the door…
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>Nah
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>Be Guardsmare Brilliant Gleam
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>Be feeding Flurry Heart
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>You were not expecting to see your lord Dadnonymous today
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>His chosen disciple Flurry must have sensed his arrival because of the bond they share
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>You remember vividly his demeanor when he was scolding the chosen disciple
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>You shudder at the thought as you remember how his voice pierced the veil of reality showing, if only for a moment, his wrath
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>Even you, versed as you are in peering behind the veil, were shaken deep to your core
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>The pressure he exerted nearly broke you, luckily your guard training helped you hold firm
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>Then it disappeared as quickly as it came
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>It let up so quickly you almost thought it was never there
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>Flurry burps as she finishes up her meal of mashed carrots and hay
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>Time to put Cadence’s spawn to bed
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>As you make your way to Flurry’s room a thought crosses your mind
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>Is Flurry truly the spawn of Cadence and Shining Armor?
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>You have no doubt the love goddess is the mother to this child, but could a mortal stallion like Shining Armor really help in conceiving this child?
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>Flurry has far too much power and energy
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>Even when factoring in that Shining is one of the most powerful unicorns out there, the raw power and near limitless energy Flurry displays is far too much
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>As you’re tucking in Flurry you notice some arcane symbols scrawled on parchment strewn about
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>they’re crude but… familiar
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>you’ve seen these symbols before…
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>Anonymous
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>Of course, it all makes sense
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>Be Anon
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>Be currently looking at what apparently is a top secret meeting of the princesses
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>It’s honestly just a glorified tea party
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>You notice a small folder with the words “SUPER SECRET DOCUMENTS’ written in crayon with little hearts and flowers drawn around it
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“Afternoon Princess Celestia it’s a lovely day isn’t it”
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>Celestia gives you a warm smile
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>”Ah Anonymous what a pleasure it is to see you, it has been too long.”
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“I agree princess but working with Flurry keeps me pretty tide up”
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>Sometimes literally
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>You let out a small chuckle and look over at Luna who seems to be pouting a little
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“And Princess Luna, did you honestly think I forgot you?”
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>”Thou couldst have made it a tad more obvious.”
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>Luna huffs a little but seems to ease up a little
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“Do you princesses mind if I sit down?”
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>”Not at all Anonymous, and do help yourself to the refreshments.”
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>You grab a seat opposite Celestia
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>Since you arrived here the only creature that has a similar mindset to you has been Celestia
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>It makes a bit of sense considering she’s just about the oldest living being on the planet
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>Even then she still displayed some childlike mentality
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>”So Anonymous what have you been doing with Flurry that keeps you so occupied
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>Ah shit, quick think of something non conspicuous
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“Oh you know, this and that”
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>”Forgive our ignorance sir Anonymous, but we do not. After all tis why our sister posed the question.”
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>Crap, Luna’s got you there
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“Well, I have been teaching Flurry cursive. It’s slow going, but we’re making good progress.”
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>Great save Anon
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>At least it would have been, if the Princesses didn’t look at you like deer caught in your headlights
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>”C-cursive”
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>”But Anonymous, cursive is so challenging.”
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>”Indeed, and for you to start her so young… truly it is too much for her.”
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>You expected some surprise but not in this way
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“Actually she’s really gotten the hang of it. She can even write her own name. I mean sure her penmanship is a little sloppy but she’s still young, she’ll improve with time.”
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>The princesses turn to look at each other then back to you
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>Princess Celestia speaks up
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>”If you’re certain Anonymous, but please go easy on Flurry.”
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“I assure you Princess; I’ll take the lessons slow.”
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>You pass some time talking about various non-topics
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“Well, it was great talking with you Princesses; we really should do this again sometime.”
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>”Of course Anonymous it’s always lovely seeing you.”
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>”Indeed, we shall miss thee.”
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>You wave goodbye to them and start walking away
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>You still have one more pony to see today
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>Flurry Heart is gonna love Knead’s pastries
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>Be Cadence, back in your room
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>Be VERY confused
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>Anonymous is teaching Flurry Heart the secret sigils known as Cur’sv
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>Even Celestia has yet to master those sacred runes
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>Yet Anonymous feels confident enough to teach it?
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>This fact troubles you, yet you can’t seem to understand why
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>Perhaps you should start responding to the foreign dignitaries
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>Take your mind off things
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>You look down at the list of names
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>There was Golden Touch, the Minotaur Princess
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>Gale Force, the Gryphon Prime Minister
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>Maggie, the Diamond Dog’s current Alpha
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>Ember, the Dragon Princess
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>Chrysalis, the Changeling Queen
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>That’s not even the full list and already your head is spinning
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>You take out your official Princess Pencil and being writing letters
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>After about two hours of grueling paperwork it’s time to review
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>…
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>…
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>…
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>Yes this is good enough, time to mail these letters and get ready for dinner.
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>At least now you’ll get to spend time with your loving family
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>Be Anonymous
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>Be giving Flurry Heart a piggyback ride to Knead’s bakery
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>Luckily it’s a short walk, so it doesn’t take long
-
>As you enter the bakery the smell of freshly baked sweets hits your nose
-
>The bell at the top of the door rings, alerting Knead to your presence
-
>Knead Love pokes his head up from behind the counter and perks up instantly
-
>”Anon it’s so good to see you, did you want your usual?”
-
>You give a warm smile back and shake your head
-
“I’m not hear for me today, I’ve got this little tyke to treat”
-
>You jostle Flurry so her head pokes up over your shoulder
-
>Knead’s eyes go wide as he notices the royal heiress
-
>”Oh of course Anon, pick whatever you want. It’s on me today.”
-
“Knead I can’t just take your delicious pastries without paying, I wouldn’t feel right.”
-
>Knead frowns and stomps his hoof
-
>”I insist Anon, you saved my life and I need to repay you.”
-
>Saved his life? All you did was kiss his burn and pat his back.
-
>It wasn’t like it was a bad burn either
-
>You sigh. You really don’t want to just take his goods, but it seems like he’s not gonna back down anytime soon
-
“All right Knead you win, thank you for your generosity.”
-
>Knead looks a little shocked then blushes a little
-
>Did he expect you to argue a little more?
-
>About a minute passes with a silence permeating the room
-
>You cough to break the silence
-
“Soooo… about my order”
-
>Knead snaps out of his trance at your words looking somewhat embarrassed
-
>”RIGHT… ehm right, what you like?”
-
>You browse the selection and settle on a raspberry tart and a black coffee
-
>Knead flinches at your mention of black coffee
-
>Ponies here can’t handle anything more bitter than a cupcake
-
“What do you want Flurry?”
-
>Flurry puts her hoof to her chin before pointing at…
-
>A cake…
-
>Please let her only want a slice
-
“Do you want a slice of that cake?”
-
>She shakes her head, oh boy…
-
“So you don’t want that cake then?”
-
>Flurry frowns at you and points harder at the cake
-
“Flurry you can’t have an entire cake.”
-
>Flurry looks as if she’s about to try and convince you when Knead of all ponies speaks up
-
>”Well why can’t she?”
-
>Was Knead serious?
-
>Was he really okay with giving up an entire cake?
-
>Comped or not you couldn’t just take an entire cake
-
“She can’t because it’ll ruin her appetite for dinner, plus I don’t feel right taking an ENTIRE cake from you Knead even if you say I saved your life.”
-
>The air around you suddenly felt really heavy
-
>You could tell the mood dropped from just a second ago
-
>Quick say something idiot
-
>Okay don’t shout at me brain
-
“Look Flurry you can still have a slice, just not the whole thing.”
-
>Flurry starts giving you puppy dog eyes
-
>Don’t give in Anon, be strong
-
“Flurry what if other ponies want to have some of that cake also?”
-
>You hate playing the guilt trip card but it has to be done
-
>Don’t want her to grow up spoiled
-
>YOU WILL TEACH THIS FILLY SHARING WHETHER SHE LIKES IT OR NOT
-
>Flurry looks at you a little dejected but nods
-
>It hurts you to do this now but it’ll all be good in the long run
-
>You come up with the greatest plan to get her to smile again
-
>The old thumb trick
-
“Hey Flurry watch this”
-
>Flurry stares intently as you make it look like you tore your thumb in half then magically reconnect it.
-
>Just as predicted Flurry begins to laugh
-
>”Here you are Anon, one raspberry tart, on slice of double fudge cake and one… black…. Coffee”
-
>Knead had to strain to say that last part but you just smile and thank him
-
>You grab your order and pick a seat next to a window and let your mind wander
-
>… Did you remember to tell Cadence what you were doing with Flurry?
-
-
>Be Mi Amore Cadenza
-
>And you are FREAKING OUT
-
>Flurry heart is missing and you’re going to have the butt of whoever was in charge of watching her on a silver plater
-
>You’re storming off to the guard barracks to question everypony there
-
>As you’re making your way, you run into Shining on your way
-
>”Oh hello dear, where are you going? Dinner is this way.”
-
>He gives you a stupid smile, god you love that smile. It almost makes you lose your anger
-
>Almost, you have to tell him about what happened
-
“Shining our daughter is missing and I’m on my way to the barracks to *Talk* with the ponies who were watching her today.”
-
>Shining’s smile quickly fades into shock and horror as the words leave your lips
-
>”W-what? She’s missing? Come on I know whose squad was on watch today.”
-
>Without another word you both rush to the barracks
-
>In less than a few minutes you both burst through the door
-
>”GUARDSMARE BRILLIANT GLEAM GET YOUR BUTT HERE THIS INSTANT!”
-
>A silence sweeps through the barracks as everypony turns to look at one mare
-
>Singled out, Brilliant Gleam walks forward and bows
-
>”Good evening princess, captain. What can I do for you?”
-
>”Brilliant Gleam, where is our daughter? Your squad was in charge of the protection of our beloved child. WHERE IS SHE?”
-
>Brilliant Gleam looks up without a care in the world
-
>You are furious
-
>”Flurry Heart is safe she’s with dad.”
-
>”SHE IS NOT WITH ME! DO NOT LIE TO US!”
-
>”But isn’t Anon her dad?”
-
>You’re stunned, and so is Shining. To think that she thinks Anonymous is Flurry’s father. This time it’s your turn to be angry
-
“Brilliant Gleam let me be clear, ANONYMOUS IS NOT FLURRY’S FATHER. Do not EVER think otherwise, Shining and I went through Tarturus to have Flurry and I will not have you spreading lies.”
-
>Brilliant Gleam doesn’t flinch but you can sense her emotions
-
>She’s torn up inside
-
>Shining has calmed down somewhat and speaks up
-
>”Did he at least say where he was taking her?”
-
>Brilliant puts her hoof to her chin before lighting up as she remembered
-
>”Right, he said they were going to Knead’s bakery across the street”
-
>”And you didn’t think to inform us of this?”
-
>Brilliant lowers her head, her voice almost a whisper
-
>”I’m sorry.”
-
>Shining sighs, sensing his emotions you see he’s also torn up inside
-
>You can understand why
-
>Brilliant was hand selected by him to join the Crystal Guard, and she was extremely talented too
-
>But as her commander he had to make the hard decisions
-
>”Brilliant Gleam, for failure to carry out your duty to watch over our daughter, and then lie to us… I must sentence you to 1 full day time out.”
-
>Most ponies are shocked, and you are to.
-
>But for a different reason no doubt
-
>Shining here was being extremely lenient with her punishment
-
>It was at this moment you saw Brilliant Gleam breakdown crying
-
>Even after all she had done, it hurt you to see her like this
-
>”P-p-please, I c-can’t go to time out. My reputation will be ruined.”
-
>”You should have thought of that before doing what you did.”
-
>…
-
“Darling perhaps you’re being a little… to… harsh?”
-
>Shining turns to you surprised, you are to
-
>Shining opens and closes his mouth a few times, but settles on turning to Brilliant
-
>”Perhaps I was caught up in anger. Upon thinking it over perhaps I was too harsh.”
-
>Brilliant stops crying and looks hopeful
-
>”But, you must still be punished”
-
>Brilliant’s ears drop in sadness
-
>”Brilliant Gleam your punishment will be amended to one week leave from the guard, effective at the end of your shift. This meeting is over.”
-
>As the verdict leaves Shining’s mouth, a sigh of relief wafts through the barracks
-
>One thing is clear; you need to talk to Anonymous.
-
-
>Be Anonymous
-
>Be walking a contented Flurry Heart back to the castle
-
>You still felt bad about taking that order for free, but every time you brought it up Knead just shot it down
-
>Ponies here seem to be very generous
-
>Like scarily generous
-
>Back when you first arrived here you stayed at Twilight’s treebary
-
>She told you how friendship is magic and you had assumed it was just something like a saying
-
>Doing a little research quickly told you that it was actually literal
-
>And when Twilight told you about the elements of harmony, she told you about how the elements influence the everyday lives of ponies
-
>You thought that too was just hyperbole, but it seems that from your recent encounters it’s true as well
-
>It’s funny, maybe that’s why everything is so kid friendly here
-
>As you approach the castle gate you’re greeted by a flustered looking Cadence and Shining
-
>Shit, guess you owe them an explanation
-
“Hey Princess, Shining. Sorry I kind of ran off with Flurry, she wanted to hang out so I took her to get some cake.”
-
>You hand off Flurry to Cadence who breathes a sigh of relief
-
>”It’s all right Anonymous, were just glad to see she’s safe”
-
>Cadence hands Flurry to Shining who walks back into the castle
-
>”Anonymous can I talk to you for a minute”
-
>Ah shit here it comes
-
>”Anon, the Guard who was looking over Flurry today told us something really mean.”
-
>Wait, does she just want to rant?
-
“Well what did they say? Can’t be that bad.”
-
>”Anon, she called you Flurry’s Father.”
-
>Wait what? You, Flurry’s father?
-
>Sure you spend a lot of time with her but you don’t remember banging Cadence
-
“Uh… sorry, I’m not sure I heard you right. Did you say she thought I was her Father?”
-
>”Uh-huh, right in front of Shiny too”
-
>Well… shit, you kind of feel like shit now
-
“Well what happened after that?”
-
>”Shiny sent her home for a week, though that was after I talked him down”
-
>Really? Only a week of leave? Are the punishments here kid friendly too?
-
“What did he want to give her a time out?”
-
>You say half joking
-
>”Yeah, he did. Brilliant may have lied to us about where Flurry was, but she’s still only a pony.”
-
>This fucking place
-
>Wait did she say Brilliant?
-
“Uh what did you say her name was?”
-
>”Brilliant, Brilliant Gleam.”
-
>Ah crap, now it makes sense
-
>This is gonna be hell to explain
-
“Listen, Cadence I think I know why she called me Flurry’s dad. A lot of ponies, especially those I’m friends with, consider me a father figure. So I think she may have gotten confused.”
-
>”What if Flurry sees you as a father figure too, more than Shiny her actual father?”
-
>Fuck, it’s not looking any easier
-
“I’m certain Flurry knows, and sees Shining Armor as her father.”
-
>”But how can you be sure?”
-
“Just trust me.”
-
>There’s a long pause, as the weight of the matter hangs in the air
-
>”… okay Anonymous, I’ll trust you”
-
>Phew, crisis averted
-
>You gotta talk to Brilliant when you get back to your apartment
-
>”Oh and Anonymous… could you maybe not babysit Flurry next week. I know I said I trust you, but…”
-
”I understand, you and Shining enjoy your time with Flurry.”
-
>Cadence gives you a smile
-
>”Thank you… I’ll make it up to you.”
-
>You wave goodbye to Cadence and head back home
-
>Since you and Brilliant have the same week off, she’s not gonna get away from your little talk
-
-
>Be Brilliant Gleam, citizen now
-
>Your life is over
-
>One week of leave, what’s next? They fired you in all but name.
-
>You should be thankful you won’t have a… time out record at least
-
>That’ll help you get another job later
-
>But the guard was your life
-
>You lifelessly go through the motions of making your dinner
-
>Pull the tab off a can of ravioli, and dump it in a bowl
-
>The food is magically kept warm while in the can for ease of consumption
-
>The perfect cry food
-
>You weep while shoving the warm cheese filled ravioli into your mouth
-
>It makes you feel a lot better actually
-
>Still what are you gonna do with your time now?
-
>As you’re about to eat another spoonful a knock at your door draws your attention
-
“Just a minute, I’ll be right there”
-
>Getting up you drop your spoon back in the bowl
-
>Opening the door, you’re wondering who it could be at this hour when
-
“ANON?”
-
-
>Be Anonymous
-
>And you think you’re going to go deaf from how loud Brilliant yelled your name
-
“Hey, Brilliant. We’ve talked about this, just because I’m tall doesn’t mean I can’t hear you.
-
>”Oh… sorry Anon, I was just surprised to see you at this hour.”
-
“That’s all right Brilliant, just remember next time.”
-
>Brilliant giggles
-
>Fuck that’s cute
-
>Wait Anon, remember why you’re here
-
“Hey Brilliant, I was at the Castle today and were you in charge of watching Flurry today?”
-
>Her demeanor instantly shifts
-
>”O-oh, uh yeah I thought you recognized me”
-
>Things are getting kind of akward, man this is gonna be hard
-
“Hey Brilliant, you mind if I come in?”
-
>”Oh, sure thing Anon. Make yourself at home.”
-
>Stepping inside you take stock of Brilliant’s room
-
>Yup, just like you remember it
-
>Minimal furniture: A couch, a table, and a bookshelf.
-
>On the left there’s a little kitchen den, and on the right a door that presumably leads to her bedroom
-
>You say presumably, because you’ve never been in there
-
>Brilliant walks over to her couch and sits
-
>She gestures for you to sit next to her, which you do
-
“Brilliant, this is going to be tough to say so I’m just gonna ask. Why did you tell Cadence that I’m Flurry’s father?”
-
>”But Anon, aren’t you her father? After all you’re with her so often, and I saw cursive in her room. You’re the only one I know who can write cursive.”
-
>God damn this is making you uncomfortable
-
“Brilliant, I’m going to say this only once, so pay attention.”
-
>Brilliant turns to you gazing intensely
-
>Fuck it good enough
-
“Brilliant, I. AM. NOT. FLURRY’S. FATHER. Just because I spend a lot of time with her doesn’t mean I’m Flurry’s father. I’m just her sitter, okay?
-
>”Oh… okay Anon. Sorry I made trouble for you.”
-
>Her ears droop and you feel like shit
-
>You knew this was gonna be hard but it’s for the best
-
>”Hey Anon, I know I made trouble for you but… I lost my job today… could you maybe stay a bit?”
-
>Lost her job? She’s on one week leave. She’s basically on a forced vacation.
-
>Still by the standards of this world that might be much more vicious of a punishment
-
“Sure Brilliant, I can stay for a bit.”
-
>Brilliant nods sadly and goes back to eating her… is that ravioli?
-
>As you sit on her couch you begin to absentmindedly pet Brilliant
-
>As tough as Crystal ponies are, they’re surprisingly pleasant to pet
-
>Brilliant finishes up her ravioli and begins to does off
-
>She curls up on your lap and starts to sleep
-
>Fuck you really don’t want to wake her up but you’ve got to get her to bed
-
>You look down at the pony napping on your lap… Maybe just a few more minutes
-
>Be secretary Anon
-
>And you are fucked
-
>Seriously Mayor Mccheese got into a huge scandal regarding Birdie and a certain golf game
-
>And now, because you’re his secretary, people think you were in on the whole thing too
-
>You have to find any record you can about this, anything at all
-
>If you didn’t come out and show how against this you were, you could kiss your political career goodbye
-
>You’re rummaging through your desk when someone enters your office
-
>you quickly look up to try and see if you can pretend you’re not here
-
>Strange she looks familiar… wait
-
“Princess Luna?”
-
>The princess of the night smiles at you
-
>”Indeed Anonymous, we are flattered thou has not forgotten us.”
-
>You calm down a bit
-
>Given that Princess Luna is here it can only really mean one thing
-
“I guess I’m dreaming aren’t I.”
-
>Princess Luna smiles and the scene around you fades leaving you both in an empty void
-
>Knowing that you are dreaming you conjure up a couple of chairs offering one to Luna
-
>She graciously accepts the offer and you both sit
-
“So, any particular reason you came here tonight?”
-
>”Of course not Anonymous, I simply wished to see you, after all we see each other so rarely these days.”
-
“Uh-huh, you do know we just saw each other today right”
-
>Luna seems taken aback by your words
-
>”Doth thou truly despise my presence so?”
-
>You know Luna is only joking, but still, guilt tripping?
-
“Come on Princess, you and I both know dream walking takes a lot out of you. You wouldn’t come if you didn’t have a good reason.”
-
>Luna looks at you like she’s genuinely hurt
-
>Okay maybe you took it a little far
-
>”Is talking with us truly so terrible”
-
“Come on, I didn’t mean it like that. If you just want to talk, that’s fine. What did you want to talk about?”
-
>She looks a little tired, and sighs.
-
>”Anonymous, we wish to ask you a… personal question.”
-
>A personal question? If one of the highest powers in the world is asking you something personal, it’s gotta be serious.
-
“What’s up Luna?”
-
>She pauses for a second before leaning in
-
>”Anonymous… what was your previous life like?”
-
>Was Luna serious, your world?
-
>To be honest it had been a while since you had thought about your previous life.
-
>Twilight had been pestering you since you first arrived in Ponyville but after seeing just how kid friendly this place was, you knew better than to ruin it by telling her just how fucked up Earth is
-
>You look at Luna. Maybe she could handle it? After all she’s almost as old as Celestia, so she should be able to handle a story more graphic than Cinderella.
-
“To be honest Princess there isn’t much to tell. I lived day to day, working at my job, hanging out with the few friends I had, just trying to keep my head down while the world kept on spinning.”
-
>You pause to gauge Luna’s reaction but so far she seems to be invested. So you continue.
-
“My job wasn’t anything special either. I worked at a bowling alley. I fixed the machines mostly, but also helped the porters clean up every now and again before the leagues, or a big party came in. After words a couple co-workers would invite me to get drunk.”
-
>You felt something wet roll down your cheek. Are- are you crying?
-
>Can you even cry in a dream?
-
>You look to Luna who seems a little shocked at a rare display of sadness from you
-
“Sorry, sorry… gimme a sec here.”
-
>”We are the ones who should apologize Anonymous, we did not wish to make you relive bad memories.”
-
“No… no these aren’t bad; I just… didn’t… realize how much I missed my old life.”
-
>You wipe away some of your tears and take a couple breathes before continuing
-
“I wasn’t really in contact with my family anymore, we were too far apart for a visit and my parents were too busy for a call.”
-
>”Enough Anonymous we have heard enough.”
-
>You look up to Luna who’s crying now.
-
“Everything alright Princess? Do you need a minute?”
-
>”Anonymous, *sniff*, we are… so sorry to hear you could not be with your family. Did you even get to say goodbye.”
-
>Shit probably shouldn’t mention family to the goddess who was banished by her sister
-
>What’s the best move here? Should you lie…?
-
>Fuck it, no use in lying
-
“*Sigh* no princess I didn’t get to say goodbye to my family, we actually parted on somewhat of a sour note.”
-
>You turn away from Luna before you feel her hooves wrap around you
-
>She softly sobs into your shirt as you see the dream fading before you
-
>Probably wasn’t a good idea to tell her all this
-
>Guess even Luna isn’t that mature
-
>You pat her back
-
“Luna, it’s time for me to wake up.”
-
>She rises from your shirt and clears her throat
-
>”Very well Anonymous, should thou ever need a shoulder to cry on we shall be here.”
-
>She gives you a weak smile
-
>Yeah no, if you ever tell her about the rest of your life she’d need your shoulder
-
“Sure Luna, I’ll keep it in mind.”
-
>”Promise?”
-
>You smile
-
“Promise.”
-
>And with that your vision fades to white as your eyes open
-
-
-
>Be Princess Luna, Goddess of the Night
-
>You are very worried
-
>Anonymous’ story hit you harder than you thought
-
>But that should have been obvious since it made even Anonymous weep
-
>From the criminally small time you have spent with Anonymous, not once have you seen him show sadness
-
>Once you witnessed as he was mortally wounded by a clumsy guard
-
>You were certain that was the end for him
-
>Yet he got back up and attended to the guard
-
>Yet when he recalled his home, he wept
-
>He claimed it was in reverence, yet…
-
>His family, when he recalled them you sensed a shift in his mood
-
>Something is wrong with him and he needs help
-
>You hope your sister shall agree to let you take more action
-
>If he is to ascend, he must be protected from this
-
>You shall be the one to protect him
-
>You must
-
-
>Be Brilliant Gleam
-
>Be waking up from the most comfortable sleep you’ve had in forever
-
>You yawn and blink a few times to adjust to the sunlight
-
>You feel something soft, yet firm under your head
-
>You shift around to try to get a better look without leaving your comfy spot, to no avail
-
>Begrudgingly you lift your head and turn to see
-
>LORD ANONYMOUS!?
-
>You wrack your brain to try and process just how you came to nap on the lap of the All-Father
-
>Slowly it starts to come back to you
-
>You lost your job, cried into ravioli, Anonymous came to your door
-
>He comforted you, yet also accosted you
-
>Then he…
-
>he…
-
>Pet you
-
>It was SOOOOOO comfortable
-
>His appendages glided across your fur so delicately, yet purposefully
-
>They knew just where to stop and scratch
-
>He worked out stress in places you didn’t know you had
-
>As you’re reminiscing a thought eats at the corner of your mind
-
>Why did he pet you?
-
>For your lord to pet you, and right after he reprimanded you
-
>You’re confused, it hurts to think, you feel… warm
-
>The familiar warmth of madness envelops your body, and threatens to overtake you
-
>N-no, you are High Priestess Brilliant Gleam
-
>Servant of the All-Father
-
>You are steeped in the mystical
-
>You shall not succumb to the madness
-
>You get up, and unsteadily make your way to your kitchen
-
>Your hoof shakes as a wave of madness threatens to overtake your mind
-
>You fight to keep sane and turn on your faucet
-
>You can barely hold on as the last of your sanity fights to hold fast
-
>With the last of your strength you plunge your head into the rushing ice-cold water
-
>With the shock the madness recedes back into the depths of your mind
-
>With your sanity restored the full impact of the Icey water hits you and you reel back
-
>You lose balance and slip, falling onto the floor
-
>You lie there, tired and drenched, thankful that you still have your sanity
-
>That was close
-
>Too close
-
>Though you are a high priestess it seem that being in contact with your lord for too long is dangerous even for you
-
>It terrified you, just how powerful he is
-
>Even though you spent most of your days in the Castle, building up an immunity to the madness the princess’ produce
-
>Yet he could bring you to the brink of madness after just one night
-
>You are tired
-
>So tired you don’t notice as Lord Anonymous picks you up
-
-
-
>Be Anonymous, waking up to a loud bang
-
>Shit, what the hell was that?
-
>You take stock of what’s around you and notice Brilliant isn’t around
-
>Shit what did she get into?
-
>You quickly look around and notice that sound of running water
-
>The Kitchen
-
>You rush to the Kitchen to see Brilliant lying on the floor in a puddle of water and the faucet running
-
>You don’t have time to worry about that though, Brilliant needs help
-
>You scoop her up and take her to the couch so you can see if she’s injured
-
>You comb through her mane but find nothing out of the ordinary
-
>You move on to her back but again, everything is in order
-
>You check her hooves
-
>Fine
-
>Her Snout
-
>Fine
-
>She seems fine, if a bit stunned
-
>You breathe a sigh of relief
-
>You look towards the closed door behind you
-
>You’ve never been in that room but you think it leads to her bedroom
-
>You look down at Brilliant
-
>She seems to be asleep
-
>You hope she doesn’t mind you going into her room without her permission
-
>But it’s for a good cause, she needs sleep and a couch is no place for a nap
-
>Unless you’re desperate, but she’s not
-
>Picking her up, you make your way to the door
-
>Shifting Brilliant around you turn the doorknob and push open the door
-
>As you walk inside you’re greeted by the scent of sandalwood
-
>Interesting, choice of incense
-
>Scanning the room you confirm that this is indeed her bedroom
-
>Her bed is, to you, a full size bed with pink satin bedsheets with lace trim and a mountain of pillows
-
>You lay her down beneath the sheets as you tuck her in
-
>Pulling the sheets over her you sigh
-
>You really are like a father to some of these little ponies
-
>Looking around you notice a framed paper hanging on the wall opposite to you
-
>Getting a closer look you see it’s her guard academy certificate of excellence
-
>Shit, no wonder she thought her life was over
-
>If she got something like this, she must have dedicated her life to being a guard
-
>You exit Brilliant’s room and make your way to the kitchen to turn off the faucet
-
>While you’re here, you decide to make some breakfast for Brilliant
-
>And maybe a little for yourself
-
> looking through her cupboard you take out some oat cereal and pour two bowls
-
>In her fridge you take a couple eggs and some fruit
-
>You fry up the eggs. Over easy for you, scrambled for Brilliant
-
>As you set up the spread for you and Brilliant you wonder how she got in that position
-
>As you munch on your cereal you resolve to ask her when she wakes up
-
>Damn this is some good cereal
-
-
-
>Be Princess Cadence
-
>And you are worried
-
>Today is the first day in a long time that you and Shining are going to take care of Flurry
-
>You have everything planned out today
-
>Well, you HAD planned everything out
-
>But your plan got tossed aside once it was clear Flurry had her own plans for today
-
>You were currently chasing her halfway across the palace
-
>How does Anonymous keep up with her?
-
>Where was Flurry leading you anyway? There wasn’t much in this wing of the palace.
-
“Flurry *huff* dear… it’s time for *huff* you to go with daddy now… *Puff* he’s… he’s probably waiting for us at the barracks now.”
-
>You and Shining were supposed to trade off responsibility at lunch so that neither of you got too behind on your work
-
>Oh thank Harmony, Flurry seems to be stopping
-
>In front of a tapestry of some sort
-
“Okay Flurry, did you get all that out of your system? You ready to go see Daddy?”
-
>Flurry doesn’t respond
-
>She simply stares at the tapestry
-
>You turn to study the tapestry as well, to see what has enthralled your daughter
-
>It’s old, very old
-
>Depicting the former King Sombra, fighting wendigoes
-
>Why would Flurry be drawn to this?
-
-
>Be Brilliant Gleam
-
>You have a splitting headache
-
>What’s going on right now?
-
>You had a weird dream where Anonymous came to your door
-
>He pet you and then you dreamt that you fell asleep together
-
>You get up out of bed as you think
-
>Funny, you don’t remember going to bed
-
>You freshen up in your bathroom before going to get some breakfast
-
>A nice big bowl of Oats will clear things up
-
>Why would you dream something like that though?
-
>Was Princess Luna trying to tell you something?
-
>Or was it your mind that had something to say?
-
>You suddenly feel very uncomfortable as you walk out of your room to see…
-
>Oh by the Princesses it wasn’t a dream
-
>At your table sits your Lord
-
>Something feels… off about this
-
>You feel… something… stirring inside you
-
>He hasn’t noticed you yet, somehow
-
>Maybe you can sneak back into your room and hide till he leaves
-
>*SQUEAK*
-
>You had subconsciously taken a step back when you accidentally stepped on a squeaky board
-
>Anon’s eyes snap up to meet yours filling you with a primal dread you can’t explain
-
>His expression softens as he sees you, giving you a small smile
-
>You feel… strange
-
>He reaches out a hand offering you a seat opposite him
-
>You’re uncertain about how this day will proceed, but one thing’s for certain
-
>You need some oats
-
-
-
>Be Anon, currently finishing the last of your breakfast
-
>The food you make doesn’t have the same flavor as if you ordered it
-
>You never could figure out how these ponies make the food taste so good
-
>Probably magic of some kind
-
>But just because you aren’t magic doesn’t mean you can’t make something passable
-
>*SQUEAK*
-
>Your eyes bolt up to see
-
>Oh it’s just Brilliant
-
>She’s looking well
-
>Hopefully she doesn’t have any lasting damage
-
“Hey feeling alright?”
-
>She looks a little confused
-
>Shit does she have some brain damage from her fall?
-
>”I’m fine Anon, thanks for asking.”
-
>You breathe a sigh of relief
-
>She seems fine but she’s speaking kind of softly, she sounds almost distant
-
>She takes the seat across from you and begins picking at her eggs
-
>You two eat in mostly silence occasionally broken by a cough or burp
-
>It’s… nice, eating with a friend
-
>”Anon, did you cook this?”
-
>Wait, she’s only NOW asking who cooked?
-
“Uhhh, yeah? Why, is something wrong with it?”
-
>”O-oh no, I just… didn’t know you could cook.”
-
>Really? It’s just eggs and cereal, not like you made some five star quail’s eggs and hollandaise.
-
“I mean, yeah. I gotta know how to cook since I live on my own.”
-
>She looks a little embarrassed
-
>Fuck she’s cute when she gets embarrassed
-
>But there’s something more important on your mind
-
“Say, Brilliant. Are you sure you’re okay? I don’t mean to pry, but you looked like you had a big fall. What’s up with that?”
-
>She snaps out of her embarrassment looking puzzled
-
>”I… I don’t really remember.”
-
>You’re pretty sure she’s bs-ing you, but you probably shouldn’t pry
-
>Time to get your day sorted
-
>What are you gonna do?
-
-
>Be Anon
-
>Be finishing up breakfast with your impromptu sleepover buddy
-
>Brilliant is being pretty quiet
-
>You don’t know how she acts normally during the morning; she’s always been really chatty when you hang-out with her
-
>Maybe you should invite her to go somewhere
-
>You need to pick some stuff up, maybe you could make a day out of it
-
“Hey, Brilliant, you doing anything today?”
-
>Brilliant looks up from her bowl with a puzzled face
-
>”No, I think I’m free today”
-
“Great, I need to pick up somethings from the grocer, do you wanna join me?”
-
>Brilliant stares at you for a minute
-
>And stares
-
>And stares
-
“Helloooo! Equestria to Brilliant. You there?”
-
>Huh maybe she did hurt herself, you can’t really tell
-
>Maybe if you poke her
-
-
-
>Be Brillia—ERROR: INTIGER OVERFLOW
-
>Restoring memory…
-
>…3%
-
>…24%
-
>…76%
-
>ERROR: MEMORY CORRUPT LOADING LAST STABLE MEMORY
-
>Loading…
-
>Load complete
-
>Welcome User
-
>Executing CutePoner.exe
-
>Be Brilliant Gleam
-
>D-di Anonymous just ask you on a-a-a
-
>A date?
-
>”-stria to Brilliant. You there?”
-
>You feel something prod your cheek snaping you back to reality
-
>Huh wha?
-
>Oh right Anon was asking you on a d-date
-
“U-uh s-sure An-Anon, that sounds f-fun.”
-
>BRAIN WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?! THIS IS LORD ANONYMOUS!!!
-
>YOU CAN’T DATE HIM! THAT’S LIKE DATING PRINCESS CELESTIA!!
-
>…
-
>so why do you want to?
-
>”Cool, get ready and we’ll head out in a minute.”
-
“YEAHGREATGOTTAGOFRESHENUP”
-
>You quickly rush back into your room and bathroom locking the door behind you
-
>What have you gotten yourself into?
-
-
-
>Be Princess Cadence
-
>You finally got Flurry to go with Shiny
-
>Harmony help him, that girl is a ball of energy
-
>You can finally get to work
-
>As you enter your office you see a pile of letters sitting on your desk
-
>Unsealing the top letter you quickly skim the letter
-
Dear, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza
-
We from the, Blah, Blah, Blah… In the hopes that you will Yadda, Yadda, Yadda… Meet with the pantheon at a specified date.
-
Sincerely Prime Minister Gale Force
-
>It seems the leaders wish to finally meet
-
>This is good, now you may put your plan in motion
-
>….
-
>….
-
> How to begin
-
>Ah perfect
-
>You write your response telling them to meet in one week from now
-
>In Canterlot
-
>A shiver runs down your spine
-
>Harmony help those poor souls
-
>But if they wish to meet with the pantheon
-
>They will
-
-
>Be Anon, a half hour later
-
>Be walking around town square with Brilliant
-
>Is it considered a town square in a city?
-
>The market square
-
>You’re walking around the market square with Brilliant
-
>You’ve been walking around for a bit and picked up what you needed
-
>Milk, cheese, bread, cereal all that jazz
-
>You decide against going to the gryphon deli for now, you don’t want to gross out Brilliant
-
>Brilliant’s been kinda fidgety the whole time though
-
>You look down at her
-
>She’s nervously looking around
-
>You wonder what’s got her on so edge
-
>Maybe a snack will help calm her down
-
>Glancing around you spot a small café on the corner
-
“Hey Brilliant, you hungry?”
-
>”Huh wha? O-oh yeah Anon I c-could go for a bite.”
-
“Awesome”
-
>You guide Brilliant to the Café and sit down
-
>The Chairs outside your apartment have always been a bit small, but you make do
-
>You two look over some menus provided at the door and decide on what to snack on
-
>You decide on a cup of Earl Grey tea, and a slice of pound cake while Brilliant decides on a cup of apple juice and daisy sandwich
-
>Your afternoon snack goes by relatively calmly, though Brilliant still seems to be a little wound up
-
>tbh Brilliant’s been acting kinda weird lately
-
“Hey, Brilliant is everything alright? You seem kinda stressed.
-
>She seems to snap out of deep thought at your voice
-
>”Oh, yeah Anon, everything’s fine. I’m just… just thinking is all.”
-
>Okay yeah, she’s not fine
-
>Then it hits you
-
>She “lost” her job for a week and what are you doing?
-
>Fucking parading around town like everything’s hunky dory
-
>She probably doesn’t want to be out right now and risk being seen by one of her co-workers
-
>As big a city as the capital is, it’s still fairly tight knit
-
>God you feel like a bit of an ass right now
-
>How are you gonna make it up to her?
-
-
-
>Be Brilliant Gleam, and you don’t exactly know who you are right now
-
>Ever since your over-exposure to Anonymous things have seemed…
-
>Off?
-
>Different?
-
>Things just don’t make sense anymore
-
>Not everything… just certain things
-
>When you ate lunch with Anon, you noticed just how sweet everything was
-
>Was food always that sweet?
-
>And when you were shopping with him, the prices of things didn’t make sense to you
-
>One bit for an egg, but two for a carton?
-
>You couldn’t figure out why… but it seemed off
-
>Things weren’t making sense
-
>You glance at Anonymous
-
>You realize you’ve stopped adding Lord to his name
-
>Why? He was still Lord Anonymous the All-Father.
-
>He was still all powerful
-
>…
-
>…
-
>So why does it feel wrong?
-
>You glance at his “Hands” as he calls them
-
>Something happened when those descended upon your form
-
>Perhaps if you could recreate that sensation things might make more sense
-
>Yeah… that’s the reason
-
>THE ONLY REASON
-
>[spoiler]They feel really good though[/spoiler]
-
>No… bad head
-
>But how to get him to pet you more?
-
>”Hey Brilliant.”
-
>You snap away from your Fana… planning.
-
“What’s up Anon?”
-
>Anon sheepishly puts his hand behind his head and smiles
-
>”Uh… I wanted to apologize.”
-
“What for Anon? Have you done something bad?”
-
>”I guess. I forgot that you had been given mandatory leave and yet asked you to come along like nothing was wrong.”
-
>To be honest you had almost forgotten about that
-
>Sure you didn’t want to see your co-workers right now but…
-
>WAIT
-
>This is your chance
-
>”Anyway I can make it up to you Brilliant?”
-
>It’s now or never Brilliant, don’t let this slip through your hooves
-
>FOR THE PETS
-
>… for science of course
-
“Uh, yeah I can think of one thing.”
-
>He looks relieved
-
>”Ah, sweet what is it?”
-
>Deep breaths Brilliant
-
“Co-c-could y-you…”
-
>Come on B brave face
-
“Could y-y-you m-mayb-be p-pet m-me?”
-
>Anon looks at you confused
-
>”Um could you repeat that? I couldn’t hear you”
-
>Oh sweet Harmony
-
“Y-yeah, could… you …please…”
-
>come on Brilliant you’re almost there
-
“Um if you want maybe… pet me?”
-
>He looks a little confused still
-
>sweet harmony, don’t make you do that again
-
>”Uh sure I guess.”
-
>He shrugs
-
>TOUCHDOWN BRILLIANT IT’S PET CENTRAL FOR YOU
-
>*cough* for science *cough*
-
>Anon reaches out a hand and
-
“W-wait Anon.”
-
>What, isn’t this what you wanted?”
-
“Well, yeah. But not here, it’s too embarrassing in public.”
-
>”Oh…OH…oh.”
-
>He somewhat blushes
-
>[spoiler]Cute[/spoiler]
-
>He pays for your lunch and you both make your way to the apartment building
-
>this day is looking up
-
-
>Be *&%@$&*%@!#%
-
>This stallion tempts you with sustenance
-
>You shall abide for now
-
>You shall wait for now
-
>Wait for him to return
-
>Wait for him
-
>Wait
-
-
>Be Princess Luna, Champion of the Night
-
>Princess Cadence has just informed you and your sister of her intentions to host talks with the other leaders.
-
>Here
-
>In Canterlot
-
>You’re no stranger to madness, but this was utterly insane
-
>And yet it was absolutely brilliant
-
>The pressure you three would bear down on them, it might break there very will
-
>And, you mustn’t forget, Anonymous’ own form of pressure
-
>He’ll sit right next to you and…
-
>No, you shouldn’t get ahead of yourself
-
>You swore to protect him, and you shall do just that
-
>Tis a mere coincidence that you can best protect him if he were to be by your side
-
>For now you must wait
-
>Wait… and make everything perfect
-
-
>Be Brilliant Gleam
-
>And you are in heaven right now
-
>Seriously, Anon’s “fingers” feel so good on you
-
>This was your best idea ever
-
>You can’t even begin to describe how relaxed you are
-
>You could just… fall asleep… right now…
-
>*Sigh*
-
>Wait!!!
-
>Brilliant, remember why you’re doing this
-
>[spoiler]Because it feels nice[/spoiler]
-
>Because you need to test… something?
-
>What was it?
-
>Sleep?
-
>yeah… that was it
-
>NO!!!
-
>You need to test if Anon… has… affected you in anyway
-
>You don’t feel any different
-
>…do you?
-
>Think Brilliant, think
-
>But it’s so hard to think when you’re so relaxed
-
>no, what did it feel like before?
-
>it was
-
>it was
-
>A warmth
-
>That’s right you felt a warmth deep within you
-
>Wait, was that after you had woken up?
-
>Maybe you should sleep, to test if you’ll feel that warmth again
-
>Yeah
-
-
>Be Anonymous
-
>Brilliant just fell asleep on your lap
-
>You thought this might happen, after all that went down today
-
>Looks like she’s sleeping in your apartment this time
-
>Still there are worse things to happen
-
>after you put the groceries away, Brilliant all but demanded you pet her
-
>what was it with her and pets
-
>She acted all demure and shy in public, but now she was forceful and assertive
-
>You seriously hope this is as platonic as you think
-
>Well, not much you can do now
-
>A thought crosses your mind
-
>where will you two sleep tonight
-
>The obvious answer would be, in your bed
-
>The ponies here are innocent enough that something like that wouldn’t be TOO much of a faux pa
-
>the ponies would believe you two were just really good friends
-
>But you weren’t a pony
-
>She’ll have the bed then
-
>And you the couch
-
>Ah well, the couches here were as comfortable as any bed
-
>Time for bed
-
-
>Be Knead Love the baker
-
>Things had been slow these past couple days, but you were making due
-
>You were busy closing up shop for the night
-
>A long process but a rewarding one
-
>Lord Anonymous smile upon your store
-
“(*Q@^&$*(^@#$^*(@^!#()$#$&^”
-
[spoiler]”Knead Love come”[/spoiler]
-
>Your ears perk up, something was wrong
-
“)($Q&#*()@!$&#”
-
[spoiler]”The Park”[/spoiler]
-
>You feel compelled
-
>quickly gathering your things you finish closing and head out
-
>You should head home
-
>You want to head home
-
>But…
-
“)($&()!@&@($”
-
[spoiler]”Go, Now.”[/spoiler]
-
>something spurs you on
-
>Towards the park
-
>As you arrive you wait
-
>you don’t know what for but you wait
-
“!)@$(&!%$#@(%^)!&@$)!”
-
[spoiler]”In the bushes.”[/spoiler]
-
>hesitantly you approach the bushes
-
>Something is there
-
>Something dark
-
>your hoof reaches to part the bushes when you stop
-
>The air turns cold
-
>You feel a primal urge
-
>RUN it yells at you
-
>Something is beyond this bush that frightens you to your very core
-
>And yet…
-
>The bush parts from your path and you see
-
“You!”
TEXT
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11657 64.52 KB 1239
by Anonistrator
by Anonistrator
by Anonistrator
by Anonistrator
by Anonistrator