GREEN   626   1
   4559 26.66 KB    469

Notes On The Fridge [Green]

By xoZwei
Created: 2021-04-16 00:34:50
Expiry: Never

  1. Notes On The Fridge
  2. A ray of sun through a dusty window. A plastered yellow soul, peeling in the corner. Why not leave him a friend?
  3.  
  4. / / /
  5.  
  6. [SUNRISE]
  7. <And on those gilded rays rode Day, in all her glory and her vigor.>
  8.  
  9. >Did someone take my lunch yesterday? It was a brown bag with a little butterfly drawn on the outside. / TSP
  10. >>The lunch I had in a bag with a ladybug drawn on also went missing. / DL
  11. >>>You two BRING lunches? This fridge breaks every few days, why would you trust it? / ST
  12. >>>>I usually bring more lunch than I can eat, Twi, just find me and ask. / T.A.
  13. >>>>>That’s a lie, you’re just being nice. / TSP
  14. >>>>>>Don’t point it out. / T.A.
  15.  
  16. / / /
  17.  
  18. >OUT OF ORDER. / Maintenance Staff
  19. >>What ELSE is new? / ST
  20. >>>You know fridges retain their useful properties for at least a little while after they lose power, right? / PF
  21. >>>>So does my XXXXXX, Petulant, but you don’t see me telling people to keep their cookies in it for freshness. / ST
  22. >>>>>Disgusting. Watch your language or I’ll have to report you. / TSP
  23. >>>>>>I’ve seen worse, honestly. [A very concerned looking face is scribbled next to this sentence.] / T.A.
  24. >>>>>>>Report me to WHO? You, The Architect, who uses this just as much as we do? This is a public forum. / ST
  25. >>>>>>>>This is a fridge? / T.A.
  26.  
  27. / / /
  28.  
  29. >OUT OF ORDER. Maintenance would like to kindly remind all staff that leaving vulgar notes is strictly against company policy. Disciplinary action will be taken against those that leave notes that breach company policy. / Maintenance Staff
  30. >>Oh, I’m sorry Maintenance Staff, I’ll be sure to be on my best behavior. By the way, WHAT company policy? This is Arch’s operation. We’re not a company. And you’re not “Maintenance Staff” you’re one XXXXXX little XXXXXX with a shriveled up XXXXXX and a XXXXXX the- [The note is partially covered up, shielding the eyes of the world from the rest of the furious diatribe.]
  31. >>>Get something lost in your XXXX, Sour? / T.A.
  32. >>>>XXXX you, Arch, you know this is a load of XXXXXXXX and if you don’t think so you’re a XXXXXXX idiot, you bipedal freak. / ST
  33. >>>>>I’ll take that as a yes, you did. That or you’re in dire need of caulking. / T.A.
  34. >>>>>>I’ve got plenty in one of my buckets, I think. Why did we order so much for roofing, anyway? The bathroom is what’s huge and we’re almost out of caulking for that. / PF
  35. >>>>>>>Roofs get a lot of caulking, what. / T.A.
  36. >>>>>>>>Sounds dangerous. / PF
  37. >>>>>>>>>ARE YOU ALL STILL DOING THIS? / TSP
  38. >>>>>>>>>>Lemme show you my roof. / T.A.
  39. >>>>>>>>>>>WE HAVE A JOB! / TSP
  40.  
  41. / / /
  42.  
  43. >Is our client single? / DL
  44. >>No one tell her. / T.A.
  45. >>>Why did he ask for wood from so XXXXXXX far away? / ST
  46. >>>>It could have been from my backyard and you’d call it too far. / T.A.
  47. >>>>>YOU LIVE A DAY’S JOURNEY FROM HERE. / ST
  48. >>>>>>Whatever, point still stands. / T.A.
  49. >>>>>>>I can’t believe we’re taking direction from a stallion. / ST
  50. >>>>>>>>I’m sorry, who earned the favor of the SUN HERSELF? And stop calling me stallion. / T.A.
  51. >>>>>>>>>They are single. / ST
  52. >>>>>>>>>>YES! HAVE YOU SEEN THE SIZE OF HIS- [This note is torn, none follow.]
  53.  
  54. / / /
  55.  
  56. >Has a pony actually walked around in the addition we’re building and tried to look out where the windows are supposed to go? You know, since The Architect can’t, given how tall he is. / TSP
  57. >>No, I thought Diamond was doing that. / ST
  58. >>>You said you were doing that. / DL
  59. >>>>MY job was to build the windows. YOUR job was to check them. / ST
  60. >>>>>You mean your “job” is to tell ponies to build the windows and oversee them so they do a good job. / DL
  61. >>>>>>Yes, and? / ST
  62. >>>>>>>I’ll check tomorrow, but if it’s wrong you know what that means. / DL
  63. >>>>>>>>I’ll have a lot of cross underlings to deal with. / ST
  64. >>>>>>>>>Nope. Remember what you swore to me when Arch hired us? / DL
  65. >>>>>>>>>>I’m glad our last client stood you up. / ST
  66. >>>>>>>>>>>Yeah, but I’m not the one rebuilding a window alone tomorrow. / DL
  67.  
  68. / / /
  69.  
  70. >Why are the good ones always taken? / DL
  71. >>What’s so good about this air-headed, glassy-eyed overgrown colt? Even his XXXX mare looks like she can barely stand him. / ST
  72. >>>Look at him. You KNOW he’s got a HUGE XXXX. That’s why she’s still around. / DL
  73. >>>>You know that these notes can be read by anyone, right? / T.A.
  74. >>>>>Only like five ponies and you use this fridge, Arch. And Sour takes any opportunity she can to be upset with others. / DL
  75. >>>>>>I use this fridge!!! [Several large hearts are scribbled in.] / Pleasant Blooms
  76. >>>>>>>Have you been reading these notes, Bloom? / TSP
  77. >>>>>>>>Sometimes! They’re kinda funny. / Blooms
  78. >>>>>>>>>Use your initials, you idiot. / ST
  79. >>>>>>>>>>Be nice to PB. / T.A.
  80. >>>>>>>>>>>Fine, but don’t say that to me again. / ST
  81.  
  82. / / /
  83.  
  84. >Why is Sour so grumpy? / PB
  85. >>Asks the filly filled with more whimsy than a colt. HOW did you end up on my team? / ST
  86. >>>Be nice to PB. / T.A.
  87. >>>>I assigned her to you at The Arch’s request. We both agree you need to lighten up. / TSP
  88. >>>>>Lighten up? Is that so? Have you mustered up the courage to ask Arch to pull your ears yet? / ST
  89. >>>>>>You know we keep a lot of very heavy things sitting on top of major trot-ways that you should be mindful of. / TSP
  90. >>>>>>>I may end up broken but you’ll still have unpulled ears. / ST
  91. >>>>>>>>ST has nothing to lose, Twi. You sure this is the game you wanna play with her? / DL
  92. >>>>>>>>>Ear pulling? / T.A.
  93. >>>>>>>>>>I plead the… what number was it you used? [The number five is scrawled on this note in a different script.] / TSP
  94. >>>>>>>>>>>I’m glad I joined in! / PB
  95.  
  96. / / /
  97.  
  98. >Why did you think this job would be worthwhile? / ST
  99. >>Charity does the heart good. / T.A.
  100. >>>That miserable stallion has completely forgotten this is charity. We should be teaching him a lesson. / ST
  101. >>>>Yeah, yeah, gift horses, etc. etc. but we’re absolutely not going to teach him a lesson. / T.A.
  102. >>>>>It would be very, very easy. / ST
  103. >>>>>>It is also a very, very bad idea to engage in conspiracy to cause bodily harm on fridge sticky notes. / T.A.
  104. >>>>>>>Who said anything about bodily? We simply include a few trick doors, false walls and random trapdoors. / ST
  105. >>>>>>>>How does this teach him a lesson, exactly? / T.A.
  106. >>>>>>>>>Imagine how embarrassing it’d be for him to entertain knowing the guests will be incapable of finding anything. / ST
  107. >>>>>>>>>>Is this the 1860s? / T.A.
  108. >>>>>>>>>>>What? / ST
  109. >>>>>>>>>>>>Nevermind. / T.A.
  110.  
  111. / / /
  112.  
  113. >ATTN: Sticky notes are meant to be used for important notes for coworkers or to mark what belongs to who inside the fridge. They are NOT meant to be used for communicating. Also, OUT OF ORDER. / Maintenance Staff
  114. >>Sticky notes can be used for whatever people want to use them for, Sprockets. / T.A.
  115. >>>It is his operation, after all, SPR. / PF
  116. >>>>Whatever? / DL
  117. >>>>>Yes? / T.A.
  118. >>>>>>You’ll regret saying that. / TSP
  119.  
  120. / / /
  121.  
  122. >Do not slap sticky notes on other ponies. Twi gets enough weird looks walking around with me as is. / T.A.
  123. >>You said we could use them for anything. / DL
  124. >>>Did I miss something? / PB
  125. >>>>No. / T.A.
  126. >>>>>I missed something good… A frowning face is scribbled in. / PB
  127.  
  128. / / /
  129.  
  130. >Do not slap sticky notes on other ponies OR me. / T.A.
  131. >>I told you so. / TSP
  132. >>>It was just a bit of harmless fun. / DL
  133. >>>>Scrawling “rut master” on a note and slapping it on The Arch’s back isn’t what I’d call “harmless.” We walked through town with that stuck to him. / TSP
  134. >>>>>You’re just mad that not everyone was offended. / DL
  135. >>>>>>No I’m not. / TSP
  136. >>>>>>>She is. / T.A.
  137.  
  138. / / /
  139.  
  140. >NOTICE: Attendance of company safety meetings is MANDATORY. Tomorrow’s morning meeting will be covering recent changes in Design #12-A that makes navigating the second and third floors more dangerous in specific areas. Remember, YOU contribute to a safe and productive work environment. Failure to attend the meeting will be met with disciplinary action. / Secretary Sprockets
  141. >>From who? Sprockets? / DL
  142. >>>No, from me. Please make sure to attend. I can’t have anyone falling and getting hurt. / T.A.
  143. >>>>Ooooh, don’t tempt me. [In the place of a signature are several hearts.]
  144. >>>>>Excuse me! / TSP
  145. >>>>>>You can have him back… after. / Unsigned.
  146. >>>>>>>Degenerate. / ST
  147. >>>>>>>>Who else is reading these but not replying? / PB
  148. >>>>>>>>>DOES THE DISCIPLINE INCLUDE REDUCING ME TO A QUIVERING MESS? / Unsigned.
  149. >>>>>>>>>>Who? / T.A.
  150. >>>>>>>>>>>YANK MY TAIL. / Unsigned.
  151. >>>>>>>>>>>>Please attend. / T.A.
  152.  
  153. / / /
  154.  
  155. >I don’t know who’s doing it, but please, please stop. Just come talk to me about it, I’m sure we can resolve this. / T.A.
  156. >>Excuse me? / TSP
  157. >>>Don’t worry about it. / T.A.
  158. >>>>Oh, you bet she’s worrying. / DL
  159.  
  160. / / /
  161.  
  162. >I can’t believe I have to say this. PLEASE stop leaving socks in my lunch bag. / T.A.
  163. >>EXCUSE ME? / TSP
  164. >>>I’M DYING. [This message is incredibly untidy and features a very wobbly script.] / DL
  165. >>>>What are they even for? / T.A.
  166. >>>>>I’M ACTUALLY GOING TO DIE. [This message is barely legible.] / DL
  167.  
  168. / / /
  169.  
  170. >I SAID STOP, THE PERFUME IS SPOILING MY LUNCH. / T.A.
  171. >>THE WHAT!? / TSP
  172. >>>[The message is illegible.]
  173.  
  174. / / /
  175.  
  176. >NOTICE: Sour Tidings will be out for the next two days as she attends to personal business. Please see Right Angles for information, assignments and if you have any questions. / Secretary Sprockets
  177.  
  178. / / /
  179.  
  180. >OUT OF ORDER. / Maintenance Staff
  181. >>Did you know this note is on the fridge approximately 47% of the time? / PF
  182. >>>Sounds like we should just get a new fridge, honestly. / T.A.
  183. >>>>Only 12% of the staff uses the interior of the fridge. / PF
  184. >>>>>Maybe I should just buy a cooler. You have those right? / T.A.
  185. >>>>>>60% of the staff uses the exterior of the fridge. / PF
  186. >>>>>>>That’s impossible, look how many ponies actually respond. / TSP
  187. >>>>>>>>Use goes beyond replying. / PF
  188. >>>>>>>>>ATTEND THE SAFETY MEETINGS. / T.A.
  189. >>>>>>>>>>YOU HAVEN’T YANKED IT. / Unsigned.
  190. >>>>>>>>>>>WHO ARE YOU? / T.A.
  191.  
  192. / / /
  193.  
  194. >NOTICE: Greetings new employees! We recently underwent a hiring spree to meet labor demands! As part of the new labor force intended to help bring the new addition to Canterlot Castle to fruition, please abide by the following rules, outlined below:
  195. >Do not stick sticky notes to fellow ponies or to The Architect.
  196. >Attend safety meetings to keep up to date on changes to plans and avoid accidents and costly delays!
  197. >Do not pester Twilight Sparkle with questions about The Architect.
  198. >Do not pester Sour Tidings with questions about Twilight Sparkle or The Architect.
  199. >Do not ask Diamond Loupe questions about anything but work related activities. Work related activities do not include The Architect.
  200. >Do not leave unmentionables in The Architect’s lunch.
  201. >Do not leave unmentionables on The Architect’s desk, in it, on his chair, or hidden in blueprints.
  202. >Keep to work appropriate language, or at least when speaking to The Architect.
  203. >Leaving anonymous replies to the sticky notes on the fridge is highly discouraged.
  204. >Do not court clients.
  205. >Do not make passes at clients.
  206. >Do not discuss how successful or unsuccessful you were at courting a client with your coworkers.
  207. >Follow all rules and regulations outlined in the booklets you were provided when you were hired.
  208. >Welcome to Parthenon Construction Services: I never picked a motto just use whatever!
  209. >Please attend safety meetings! If you solicited work here to get to The Architect, please hand in your resignation immediately!
  210. >>I said I didn’t have a motto! Why did you use that as the motto? / T.A.
  211. >>>I thought you wanted that as the motto. / SPR
  212. >>>>YANK MY TAIL. / Unsigned.
  213. >>>>>I said that first, try something else. / Unsigned.
  214. >>>>>>PULL MY EARS. / Unsigned.
  215. >>>>>>>You know who already cleared that. / Unsigned.
  216. >>>>>>>>MAKE ME CHOKE ON IT. / Unsigned.
  217. >>>>>>>>> I like these new hires. / DL
  218. >>>>>>>>>>This company was a mistake. / T.A.
  219. >>>>>>>>>>>IT’S OKAY IF I SUFFOCATE, HONEST. / Unsigned.
  220. >>>>>>>>>>>>D E G E N E R A T E S. / ST
  221.  
  222. / / /
  223.  
  224. >Inspector Diamond Loupe will be out of work for the foreseeable future following an accident that occurred during the Canterlot Castle project. For inspection and queries related to inspection, contact either The Architect or Right Angles. / T.A.
  225. >>This is why you attend safety meetings, in case any of you were wondering. / TSP
  226.  
  227. / / /
  228.  
  229. >Inspector Diamond Loupe remains indisposed, as such, please direct all of your inspection requests and questions to Right Angles. Do not contact The Architect. Please. / T.A.
  230. >>Did you know during his stint as Inspector, The Architect received 93% of the queries and requests for inspection? A whopping 77% were not work-related! / PF
  231. >>>PLEASE INSPECT ME. / Unsigned.
  232. >>>>I promise I won’t break, but I mean, if I do… / Unsigned.
  233. >>>>>POKE MY LUNCH. FRONT OR BACK, I DON’T CARE. / Unsigned.
  234. >>>>>>[Several notes follow, all of them bearing different levels of disgust, except for one.]
  235. >>>>>>>Hot. / Unsigned
  236. >>>>>>>>Why did I start this company? / T.A.
  237.  
  238. / / /
  239.  
  240. >I’m back! Confession time: I got hurt because I got too rowdy on some scaffolding with a stallion I had my eyes on. / DL
  241. >>Have you seen the XXXXX on the ruddy one? / Unsigned
  242. >>>Who did you think I was talking about? / DL
  243. >>>>It’s RIGHT there in your face every time he passes by. / Unsigned
  244. >>>>>It almost really was… / DL
  245. >>>>>>Those rules from way back still in effect? / Unsigned
  246. >>>>>>>YES. / T.A.
  247. >>>>>>>>What’s with all these notes? Who are you talking about? Why is this here? / Unsigned
  248. >>>>>>>>>This is an “employees only” building. / DL
  249. >>>>>>>>>>His name is Valiance. / Unsigned
  250. >>>>>>>>>>>That’s what it was! You can stay! / DL
  251. >>>>>>>>>>>>HE CANNOT. / T.A.
  252.  
  253. / / /
  254.  
  255. [SUNSET]
  256. <O gracious Night, have you come again, so soon?>
  257.  
  258. >Inspector Diamond Loupe has returned to work. I’ve decided to hold a little welcome back party for her, so please see below for further details. It’ll be at the end of the week to minimize interruptions. / T.A.
  259. >>[Several full size sheets of paper follow covered in activities, food, time tables, glitter and loud colors. Crammed into the corner of the one of the pages is a miniscule “PP.”]
  260. >>>Is attendance mandatory? / ST
  261. >>>>Sour, she’s your friend. / T.A.
  262. >>>>>And if she threw me a party I wouldn’t go to it. / ST
  263. >>>>>>Go to the party. / T.A.
  264. >>>>>>>Are you going to be there? / F
  265. >>>>>>>>Yeah. Who’s F? / T.A.
  266. >>>>>>>>>Shouldn’t have replied at all. / TSP
  267.  
  268. / / /
  269.  
  270. >[A photograph featuring a huge line of construction mares. In the center, The Architect is giving the camera a feeble wave, but he has been cut off from the shoulders up. To his right, Twilight Sparkle has been caught throwing an ugly look at the mare beside her that is staring at The Architect and not the camera.]
  271. >>Who took this? You cut off Arch’s face. / DL
  272. >>>I don’t want to step in puddles of drool or worse when I pass through here. / ST
  273. >>>>Did you have to take a picture of me like this? / TSP
  274. >>>>>If looks could kill. Jeez, Twi. / T.A.
  275. >>>>>>You didn’t hear what she whispered! / TSP
  276. >>>>>>>Don’t keep us guessing. / DL
  277. >>>>>>>>No! / TSP
  278. >>>>>>>>>I want to feel him running down my haunches. / Unsigned.
  279. >>>>>>>>>>People get their food out of this thing, you know. / T.A.
  280. >>>>>>>>>>>I’ve got food for you. / Unsigned
  281.  
  282. / / /
  283.  
  284. >Stop stealing the photograph. Just ask for one if you want it so bad. Please. / T.A.
  285. >>I’ll take ten. / F
  286. >>>Who ARE you, F? / T.A.
  287.  
  288. / / /
  289.  
  290. >Sour Tidings will be away from work for an indeterminate amount of time to attend to a family issue following today. Her team will be headed by Pulley in the interim. / T.A.
  291. >>[The fridge is covered in notes bearing condolences.]
  292. >>>Thank you. [The script is erratic and blotchy in places.] / Sour Tidings
  293.  
  294. / / /
  295.  
  296. >I saw that, Diamond. /Unsigned
  297. >>Shhh. / DL
  298. >>>Know that if I wasn’t your boss, I wouldn’t touch this with a ten-foot pole. But I am, so: What happened? / T.A.
  299. >>>>Nothing! Really, nothing happened. That’s honestly the worst part. / DL
  300. >>>>>Didn’t look like nothing was gonna happen. / Unsigned
  301. >>>>>>He got flighty hooves at the last second! / DL
  302. >>>>>>>Laid it on too thick. / Unsigned
  303. >>>>>>>>You bet it was. / DL
  304. >>>>>>>>>Please stop. / T.A.
  305.  
  306. / / /
  307.  
  308. >Anyone else miss Sour? / DL
  309. >>Her eternal grumpiness does have a kind of charm. / TSP
  310. >>>I like the faces she makes when I talk to her. / PB
  311. >>>>Please be nice to PB. / T.A.
  312. >>>>>No one was being mean? / PB
  313. >>>>>>I know. / T.A.
  314.  
  315. / / /
  316.  
  317. >OUT OF ORDER. / Maintenance Staff
  318. >>What a surprise. / ST
  319. >>>You’re back! I didn’t catch you on-site all day, how’d you do that? / Unsigned.
  320. >>>>I know how to avoid annoyances. / ST
  321. >>>>>But you won’t tomorrow! / Unsigned.
  322. >>>>>>Ugh. / ST
  323.  
  324. / / /
  325.  
  326. >ATTENTION: Princess Celestia would like to extend her formal thanks for the work done on Canterlot Castle. Congratulations! We’ve successfully fulfilled a contract from royalty with minimal incidents. The Architect would like to tell you all: “Great job everyone, we made it through and Celestia didn’t even catch any of you making off-color remarks about some of the stallions in the castle. There probably shouldn’t have been any to begin with but at this point I’ll take what I can get. End of this work week we’ll be serving food and holding a raffle as a way to say thanks. And no, attendance is not mandatory, Sour.” / Secretary Sprockets
  327. >>I actually planned on attending. / ST
  328. >>>Someone find the real ST. / DL
  329. >>>>I won’t go if you’d rather I keep “in character”, you miserable XXXXX. / ST
  330. >>>>>Nevermind, that’s her. / DL
  331. >>>>>>IS IT A PARTY / PP
  332. >>>>>>>You don’t even work here. / T.A.
  333.  
  334. / / /
  335.  
  336. >NOTICE: The Architect and Twilight Sparkle will not be present on the job site for the next three days. He has authorized the release of the following information: “The work on the Castle might have been too good. I’ve been summoned to discuss plans on another addition with Luna. I’ll have more details for everyone when I return.” While The Architect is away, please report to and receive instruction from Diamond Loupe and Sour Tidings. / Secretary Sprockets
  337. >>Someone’s popular. / Unsigned
  338. >>>WE’RE popular. We made everything with our own four hooves. Arch just helped give us direction. / Unsigned
  339. >>>>Good point, actually. / Unsigned
  340.  
  341. / / /
  342.  
  343. >NOTICE: Sour Tidings will be away for an indeterminate amount of time as she deals with another family incident. Please report to and receive instruction from Diamond Loupe and Pulley. / Secretary Sprockets
  344. >>It’s not as bad as it sounds, Sour. / Unsigned
  345. >>>I’ve heard otherwise. / Unsigned
  346. >>>>Stuff what you’ve heard. / Unsigned
  347. >>>>>We shouldn’t XXXXXXXX her. She’d never forgive us for it. / Unsigned
  348. >>>>>>She has this handled. / DL
  349. >>>>>>>Don’t lie to us. / Unsigned
  350.  
  351. / / /
  352.  
  353. >NOTICE: The Architect and Twilight Sparkle have returned. Report to and receive instruction from them when applicable. / Secretary Sprockets
  354. >>Did you bring home a very jealous little mare, Arch? / Unsigned
  355. >>>Now’s not really the time. / TSP
  356. >>>>They’re not degenerates. / T.A.
  357. >>>>>Hey! / TSP
  358. >>>>>>Just trying to fill in for Sour. / T.A.
  359. >>>>>>>She’ll be back soon. / DL
  360. >>>>>>>>And then she’ll be off again. / Unsigned
  361.  
  362. / / /
  363.  
  364. >NOTICE: You have been given keys to the Employee Lounge for the duration of our time working in Canterlot. Do not leave the Lounge unlocked when it is empty. Do not allow non-employees into the lounge. Do not make spare keys. If you were not given a key, do not request one from a friend. You know why you were not given one. / Secretary Sprockets
  365. >>Can you believe Arch didn’t give me a key? / DL
  366. >>>Yes. / ST
  367. >>>>Ouch. Come on, I didn’t do anything that bad. / DL
  368. >>>>>Every single pony with working eyes knows what you do, or try to do, on your breaks. / ST
  369. >>>>>>I knew having a mobile office was going to eventually cause problems. / TSP
  370. >>>>>>>You think everything is going to eventually cause problems. / T.A.
  371. >>>>>>>>And when am I wrong? / TSP
  372. >>>>>>>>>Most of the time, really. / T.A.
  373. >>>>>>>>>>Y.S.A.T. / TSP
  374. >>>>>>>>>>>For five minutes. / T.A.
  375.  
  376. / / /
  377.  
  378. >NOTICE: We’ve purchased a new fridge! This one even comes with a working freezer. How’s that for employee perks? / Secretary Sprockets
  379. >>Basic office equipment is not a “perk”, Sprockets. Please don’t make me look like the big guys from Beyond. / T.A.
  380. >>>The last one didn’t have a working freezer, how is that not a perk? / SPR
  381. >>>>You wouldn’t know a perk if it bit your tail off. / ST
  382. >>>>>Sour! / Unsigned
  383. >>>>>>We missed you! / Unsigned
  384. >>>>>>>Can’t say likewise. / ST
  385. >>>>>>>>You’re just mad you can’t complain about the fridge. / DL
  386. >>>>>>>>>Just wait until it fails, Sour. / PF
  387. >>>>>>>>>>Will it? / DL
  388. >>>>>>>>>>>9% chance of it. / PF
  389.  
  390.  
  391. / / /
  392.  
  393. >NOTICE: The locks have been removed. If you have not returned your key, you can keep it probably, The Architect doesn’t seem to care, just stop using the lounge for non-lounge activities. / Secretary Sprockets
  394. >>I hate you all. Who gave Diamond a key? / T.A.
  395. >>>No one did, someone just didn’t lock the door, so I did it for them. / DL
  396. >>>>With you and a court stallion inside. / T.A.
  397. >>>>>We covered up the window! / DL
  398. >>>>>>I can’t believe you hooked one. / Unsigned
  399. >>>>>>>How did you get out without making a- [Patches of adhesive sit below this torn note.]
  400. >>>>>>>>[A smug doodle of what appears to be Twilight Sparkle.]
  401. >>>>>>>>>You were right this time. / T.A.
  402. >>>>>>>>>>“This time.” / TSP
  403.  
  404. / / /
  405.  
  406. >ATTENTION: Phenomenal job on the work we put into the project for Princess Luna, everyone! You’ve all made Parthenon Construction Services very proud. The Architect would like to add, “We had several incidents this time. I expect better out of you all. You’re grown mares, not fillys still learning the ways of the world. (Twi’s words, not mine.) That said, none of the reported incidents were related to safety, we finished ahead of schedule, and there’s a very good chance that Canterlot may try to negotiate a long-term contract with us. So, we may very well be set for a good, long while. Which means… party at the end of the week, I guess?” Attendance to the party is voluntary, as always! Please see the attached fliers below for further information. Thank you for your hard work and dedication to Parthenon Construction Services! / Secretary Sprockets
  407. >>[One extra-wide sheet of paper containing information on the upcoming event is attached to the fridge containing menus, activities, time tables and further information. It is signed with a much larger “PP.”]
  408. >>>What’s a Parthenon anyway? / Unsigned
  409. >>>>A temple dedicated to a goddess that didn’t exist. It’s from ancient times in the Architect’s world. It was extremely elaborate and very finely carved from stone. / TSP
  410. >>>>>What a XXXXXXX waste of good stone. / ST
  411. >>>>>>To you, maybe. It wasn’t to us. / T.A.
  412. >>>>>>>Did your kind regularly make it a point to build things in the service of imaginary things? / ST
  413. >>>>>>>>If only you knew how much we did just that. / T.A.
  414. >>>>>>>>>Why? / ST
  415. >>>>>>>>>>You ever stack a few stones on a mountain path as a foal? Even if you knew you’d never be back to see them again? Even if the path was basically deserted? / T.A.
  416. >>>>>>>>>>>Yes, I grew out of it. / ST
  417. >>>>>>>>>>>>Same reason, but we didn’t. / T.A.
  418.  
  419. / / /
  420.  
  421. >NOTICE: Pulley is in charge of Sour Tiding’s team for the foreseeable future. Please direct questions to her and report to her for your assignments. / Secretary Sprockets.
  422. >>Has anyone heard from Sour? / Unsigned
  423. >>>She’s fine. / DL
  424. >>>>No, she isn’t. / Unsigned
  425. >>>>>She’ll be back when everything is sorted. / DL
  426. >>>>>>Half the party heard, Diamond. / Unsigned
  427. >>>>>>>Then we don’t have to repeat it, do we? / DL
  428. >>>>>>>>Half. The others deserve to know, she’s the head of a team. / Unsigned
  429. >>>>>>>>>She’ll have told them already. / DL
  430. >>>>>>>>>>Told me what? / Unsigned
  431. >>>>>>>>>>>Yeah, what are we missing? / Unsigned
  432. >>>>>>>>>>>>Is it about Oiled Shield? / Unsigned
  433. >>>>>>>>>>>>>Enough. / DL
  434. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>Listen to her. / T.A.
  435.  
  436. / / /
  437.  
  438. >It’s been six days… / PB
  439. >>His condition is deteriorating. Sour will not be back until everything is said and done. / DL
  440. >>>And you’re not there? / Unsigned
  441. >>>>She doesn’t want me there. / DL
  442. >>>>>She’d never say it. / PB
  443.  
  444. / / /
  445.  
  446. >NOTICE: Right Angles will be leading Diamond Loupe’s team for the foreseeable future. Please direct questions to her and report to her for your assignments. / Secretary Sprockets
  447. >>I’m glad she went to go see her. / PB
  448.  
  449. / / /
  450.  
  451. >ATTENTION: We’ve received a special contract and I can’t bring myself to say yes or no. I’m putting it to a vote. / The Architect
  452. >>What is it? / Unsigned
  453. >>>A tomb. / TSP
  454.  
  455. / / /
  456.  
  457. [Epilogue]
  458.  
  459. >“Just go check. I have to turn in a report anyway, I’ll be back after you’re all caught up,” said Diamond Loupe.
  460. >“Always leaving everything you can to the very fucking end, are we?” shot back Sour Tidings. Diamond threw her a sheepish grin as a reply, then trotted off. With a heavy sigh of annoyance, Sour turned to the door to the employee lounge and pushed it open. The creak of the door that rang out in the employee lounge was the same as it ever was. Light filtered in from the large window opposite the entryway, clear and strong. Someone had cleaned it. Perhaps the sky would fall next.
  461. >The fridge stood in sharp contrast to the gleaming window. It was completely plastered in sticky notes. From top to bottom. Not a single bit of its shiny black surface was visible beneath a screaming array of yellows, oranges, pinks and purples. Every single one of them bore the same message. And with the mass of notes acting as a makeshift canvas, that message had been echoed out to the size of the fridge itself, in brilliant red paint.
  462. >“We <3 You, Sour,” mouthed Sour Tidings. She shook her head, smiling in spite of herself. “Sappy colts, the lot of them.” She stared at the outpouring of affection from her coworkers. Her thoughts drifted to the sudden arrival of Diamond Loupe when things seemed darkest and her uncharacteristic, comforting silence. As the feeling welling in her felt like it would become too much, something pressed itself to the front of consciousness. Her face split into a wide smile.
  463. >The fridge had gone silent. She strained her ears for a few moments, then opened it. No light. She picked up a note from the counter beside the fridge and scrawled something onto it, then stuck it in the center of the heart her friends had painted onto the sticky notes.
  464.  
  465. >OUT OF ORDER.
  466.  
  467. >A voice from the doorway met her ears. “Did you like it?” called out Diamond.
  468. >Sour turned towards her friend, snickering, and replied, “The fridge is broken.”
  469. >“What else is new?”

Notes On The Fridge [Green]

by xoZwei