Applejack and Anon go to the Produce Market


                                            (Not mine)

                                            No.36899145

                                            >Out at the farmer's market with Applejack.

                                            >Notice a distinct lack of produce around.

                                            >"Hey Applejack, where's everypony's stands?"

                                            "Ya mean produce stands? We haven't used them since the last time changelings snuck in and started theivin' everypony's things. Most everypony nowdays keeps their products in rear storage. Much more secure."

                                            >"Rear storage? Surely you don't mean you're..."

                                            "Sure."

                                            >"Is that hygienic?"

                                            "It's self cleaning."

                                            >"Ok, but wouldn't you sell out quickly? I mean you can only fit so many back there?"

                                            "Not at all. When the changeling problem got real bad, Twilight came up with a potion to make things a whole lot bigger on the inside than they are on the outside."

                                            >"So if ponies are storing fruits in their bums, how do they, you know?"

                                            "Potion takes care of that too. Teleports it directly to the community compost pile."

                                            >"I see."

                                            >The two of you walk in silence for a while.

                                            >"So Applejack, how many apples do you have in you right now?"

                                            >The mare stops for a moment, shifting her weight from side to side.

                                            "Ah'd say 280, no, 290. Give or take."

                                            >"290 apples? Applejack, you can't fit all those apples in your ass."

                                            "See for yourself."

                                            >She move her tail aside to give you access to her ponut.

                                            >"Fine."

                                            >You reach your hand in her ponut.

                                            >It's stretchy alright, stretchy enough to allow your hand in without much in the way of lube, but it certainly wasn't loose.

                                            >"It doesn't feel 290 apple loose back here Applejack."

                                            "Keep reachin'. Potion doesn't take effect til a little way in. Gives us better control of things."

                                            >"We'll see about that."

                                            >You reach in deeper until you reach what can only be described as a wall of apples.

                                            >"Is this it?"


                                            "Yep. Feel around a bit. You can take one if you'd like. On the house."

                                            >You feel around a bit and you start to wonder if maybe there really is that many apples back here.

                                            >"Alright Applejack, I have to hand it to you. Maybe you're right."

                                            "Of course I'm right."

                                            >You select a sizable apple and begin to removes your arm.

                                            >You're met with some resistance as your hand and the apple reach the entrance.

                                            >Eventually her ponut lets go of both with a pop.

                                            >You examine the specimen, a fine example of what an apple should be.

                                            >It in no way seems affected from the unorthodox storage solution.

                                            >"I am impressed."

                                            "Just business as usual."

                                            >"So how long does the potion last, what happens when it runs out?"

                                            "Potion last 3 days, so you always want to make sure you're topped up. When it runs out, ya want to make sure you're empty or your storage is gonna make a rather violent exit. Don't want to be anywhere near a pony's backside when that happens."

                                            >"So when was the last time you 'topped up'?"

                                            "Let's see..."

                                            >Not particularly hungry, you go to return the apple.

                                            "Now was that Thursday or Friday?"

                                            >The apple was at her backdoor when suddenly,

                                            "ANON WAIT!"

                                            >She quickly turns around and tackles you to the ground.

                                            >A sound between a ketchup bottle being squirted and Saturn V rocket taking off erupts from her backside.

                                            >The two of you cower together as it goes on for half a minute.

                                            >By the time it finally ends, Applejack is practically shaking.

                                            >You carefully peek over her shoulder to see what the damage was.

                                            >In place of the schoolhouse was a smoking crator filled with apple sauce.

                                            >Thank Celestia today was Sunday and there was nopony there.

                                            >"That looks like a whole hell of a lot more damage than 290 apples.

                                            "I might have lied, just a little."

                                            >"Element of honesty my ass."