Mr. Piggy by DCFTEF


                                            Mr. Piggy by DCFTEF

                                            (none / none)

                                            cane


                                            (17/04/2016)


                                            https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/27053171/#q27111527


                                            ---


                                            You are Filthy Rich

                                            Owner of Barnyard Bargains

                                            The #3 retail chain in all Equestria

                                            You're successful because you give the ponies what they want


                                            Case in point;

                                            Spring time is exam season in the Equestrian education system

                                            It's a lousy time to hold important exams, you know because you're a father yourself

                                            Young colts and fillies don't want to concentrate on studying when Spring is in the air

                                            They'd rather be outside, playing in the newly returned sun

                                            So many Ponyville parents feel the need for a little extra reminder,

                                            Something that will keep their foals' minds on responsibility when there are so many distractions

                                            Sales of spanking canes multiply during exam season

                                            And you're happy to provide the customers with what they want

                                            You order an extra barrel of top-quality rattan canes from Singapone

                                            Since you buy in bulk you can offer 'em at a discount; 50¢ a piece

                                            Are you taking advantage of some poor foal's misfortune to make a profit?

                                            Sure, but it's not your problem

                                            If you don't study hard you get spanked hard instead, kid

                                            CAPITALISM BABY! Gotta love it!


                                            Anyway, you're tending your flagship retail store in Ponyville

                                            Built on the site of your Grand-Sire's trading post

                                            You like coming down from your office to work the floor when you can

                                            Meet the customers

                                            Keep your staff from slacking

                                            Best of all you don't have to pay some pony to do work you can do with your own hooves

                                            Your wife & daughter don't understand

                                            They LOATHE manual labor and would rather pay employees to do the heavy lifting

                                            It's just as well

                                            You love your family like any good Equestrian father

                                            But a few hours escape from them sure benefits your sanity


                                            So it's a day like any other

                                            Early afternoon, too early for ponies to be getting off work

                                            The store is slow

                                            You make good use of the time

                                            Straightening up displays, making sure the floor is swept

                                            >"Umm...excuse me...sir?"

                                            A little pegasus looks up at you with big, sad eyes

                                            Blank flank. White and gray dapple coat.

                                            She's holding a hammer under her wing


                                            >"I don't have enough money for this, but I only need it for a second,

                                            >"Can I borrow it, please?"

                                            She's a little young to be swinging a hammer around your store

                                            More information is needed

                                            >"What's a little lady like you need such a big hammer for?"


                                            She sniffles, and tears pool up in her eyes

                                            >"I...*sniff*...I did a bad thing, sir.

                                            >"I took something from your store without paying."

                                            Well, usually you take a hard line with shoplifters

                                            It's store policy to call the Ponyville Constable when you catch one

                                            With younger offenders, you typically march them straight home and turn them over to their parents

                                            Ponyville is a small town...everypony knows where everypony else lives

                                            But for some reason you want to know this sad filly's story

                                            >"That's not good, sweetie, do you want to tell me about it?"


                                            She sniffles again and explains;

                                            >"I know it was bad. My Mommy caught me and made me bring it back.

                                            >"Now I'm gonna get a spankin' when I get home.

                                            >"But Momma said;

                                            >>'If you steal from a store you deserve to pay for your own cane!'

                                            >"So...can I please use this hammer without buying it?"


                                            You still don't understand, but she withdraws a ceramic piggy bank from her saddlebag

                                            >"I've had Mr. Piggy for a long time,

                                            >"I'm sure he has enough money inside him."

                                            She sets her bank on the counter

                                            You tip it over a little with your hoof

                                            It's the traditional kind of bank with no rubber stopper in the bottom

                                            Now you understand the hammer...


                                            A good business stallion would let her smash the bank, sell the cane and talk this filly into a brand-new piggy bank to replace the one she just smashed

                                            Housewares and home goods...second floor aisle 3.

                                            But she's so sad, it tugs at your heart

                                            >"Goodbye Mr. Piggy"

                                            She sniffles;

                                            >"I really liked having you on my dresser."

                                            With tears rolling down her cheek she kisses her piggy on its cold ceramic nose


                                            Even the hard-edged capitalist in you can't take this

                                            It gives you heartburn to lose a sale...but you have to do something

                                            >"Well, this is a high-quality hammer"

                                            She looks even sadder

                                            >"I'm sure it could do the job, but I have a better idea.

                                            >"If your Momma really wants you to come home with a cane I could sell it to you on credit"

                                            She sniffles and asks;

                                            >"What's credit?"

                                            >"Well, it means you can take an item home today and pay me for it slowly, as you get the money

                                            >"How does five pennies a week sound? You'll be all paid up in just a little more than 2 months...and Mr. Piggy can go home safe with you."

                                            She's still a sad filly with a lot to worry about

                                            But you've made her a little bit happier

                                            >"Just 5 pennies a week? I can afford that!"

                                            You're not going to charge a little filly interest on a 50¢ item that's going to be used to spank her own rear-end


                                            So you go through the motions of setting up a formal credit account

                                            This can be a learning experience

                                            You explain the papers and show the filly her payment schedule

                                            Then you pick one of the smaller canes out of the barrel for her

                                            >"Thanks so much, Mister!"

                                            She hugs her ceramic piggy like a stuffed plush animal

                                            >"You hurry along now, don't keep your Momma waiting."


                                            The dapple filly is still going home to a painful ordeal

                                            She shoplifted, and she's gonna suffer for it, you can't change that

                                            But maybe you made her day just a little less awful

                                            >"Thank you, Mr. Rich. You're really nice."

                                            There are not many ponies in town who'd say that

                                            There's almost a smile on her face as she leaves to endure her just punishment


                                            You close the cash register

                                            Your employees can handle the store for the rest of the day

                                            The boss is going home

                                            You want to spend some time with Diamond Tiara

                                            See if her homework is done...if she needs some help studying

                                            Maybe even read her a story if she's not too cool for that


                                            Sometimes, something just reminds you there are more important things than profit.


                                            END