Twiley and the Ultimate Horn Job by DCFTEF

(Inkwell / Twilight)

 

(05/12/2016)

 

 

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"Just in case you get tired of horse pussy.

"Sincerely;

"Your buddies back on Earth."

 

"Wow, human females sure are flexible..."

"You're one to talk."

"Hey Anon, what do you call this one?"

"Ow!"

"This one here, Anon, where the human mare wraps her finger-thingies around the man-stallion's wiener."

"That's called a 'hand-job', Twi."

"Oh...clever...because you primates have hands instead of hooves."

"Seems like the female could really hurt the male if she did it wrong.

"Is it considered an advanced technique?"

"No, actually it's a lower-level sex act. Usually the first thing young human teens experiment with.

"Remember how I explained baseball analogies? It's 'third base'."

"Oh, okay. So it's like a horn-job."

"Sorry, I keep forgetting you don't have magic in your world.

"It's kinda the same thing...the first thing a unicorn filly does with a colt she likes."

"It's also the act that absolutely RUINED any chance I ever had for a normal dating life in school."

"Oh yeah? How did that happen?"

"Well, I was about 13...attending Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns..."

 

"I was in the 7th Grade, and I was kind of a dork...even worse than I am now if you can believe it. It seemed like ALL the other fillies in my class had at least kissed a boy, I felt like the only one who hadn't. Even Moondancer had smooched a pegasus colt when she was away at summer camp. MOONDANCER, for Celestia's sake! That filly smelled like cheese and had eyeglass crust that could be carbon-dated! Even she got to kiss a colt before me!"

 

"There was a boy I sorta liked. I had filly-crushes on some handsome older colts, like any schoolfilly my age, but they were totally out of my league. Beetle Brand was actually my friend...he was my age and just as geeky and awkward as me. He had a magnifying glass for a cutie mark and could stare at an ant-hill for hours. When I saw the Seniors hang him up by his shorts in gym class I knew he was the colt for me!"

 

"Beetle and I read together a lot, but I don't think he ever thought of me as anything but a study-buddy. I decided I was gonna change that. There was a hallway on the upper floors of Princess Celestia's school where the older students went to make out and do...other stuff. Every pony called it 'Lover's Lane'. You got in trouble if an adult staff member caught you messing around...but teachers usually didn't go up there. It was considered a pretty safe spot."

 

"So one day I borrowed a little perfume from Lemon Hearts, brushed my mane really nice and got Beetle Brand in a good mood...I brought him a new book about bugs.

"I had a plan; I wasn't just gonna kiss him...all the other fillies had done that already. If I was going to stop being the biggest dork in the 7th grade I had to jump past all of them."

 

"I know what you're thinking, Anon. I was doing it for all the wrong reasons. I wanted to be cool for a change. It stinks always being the biggest loser in school, being the baby who's always last to do important things. I guess I wanted to be the big-horse on campus for a change."

"Anyway, I'd found a naughty magazine that one of the older fillies left in the girls' room. It had an article; 'How to drive your stallion wild with the Ultimate Horn-Job.' I snuck that magazine home and hid it under my mattress. I read it over and over again until the pages started to fall out. I even practiced on a carrot. You know how I get when there's a new spell to learn...I was obsessed."

 

"So the big day arrived. My friend Beetle loved the new bug book I'd found, and he even said I smelled pretty today! So I asked him if he maybe wanted to go up to the 4th floor and hang out someplace a little more private that the library.

"He was pretty nervous about that. It was mostly older students who went up there to fool around...and even they got in big trouble if they got busted on 'Lover's Lane'. It was no secret; at Princess Celestia's School 'big trouble' meant you were sent to the disciplinary office to get your rump busted with a wooden paddle. Nopony wanted that!"

"So Beetle wasn't really sure about it, but I talked him into it. Poor guy...I honestly didn't take no for an answer. I sorta guilted him into it over the new book, like he owed me. I really felt bad about it later...but we'll get to that."

 

"Luckily, Lover's Lane was empty. All the cool kids were at some kind of sports game or a pep rally or something so us egg-heads had it all to ourselves for once.

Beetle Brand would have been perfectly satisfied to just kiss...or just hang out and read about bugs, but like I said I didn't give him a lot of choice."

 

"I made Beetle lay down on his back, like this..."

"He was worried about getting caught, but I told him everything was going to be okay. I told him I had a new spell to show him. Like I said, I'd been practicing on a carrot, but there's only so much you can do with vegetables. A colt's wiener feels totally different the first time you touch it with your magic. But the instant I did Beetle stopped complaining. He got hard so quick! I was a little freaked out but I figured it was proof I was doing it right...so I started doing the spell from the magazine.

"I really can't explain what I was doing to a being without magic...it's sorta like touching and rubbing something but deeper, like I was touching every part of his penis and balls, inside and out. He was rock-hard, breathing heavily with a glazed look in his eyes, so I figured I was doing it right. I concentrated harder...little magical sparks were coming off my horn and falling down on his dong, cracking & popping as they touched. Beetle Brand was all warm and sweaty...I could feel the heat coming off him and his peanut-butter breath was hot and damp like the jungle."

"I didn't know how long I could keep it up...or how long Beetle could last. He opened his eyes wide, they had this weird look like he was afraid but it didn't register with me. The magazine said a stallion makes funny faces right before he's about to orgasm...I was just excited that I was gonna make a boy cum on my first try!"

"Beetle began to stammer, but he couldn't get any words out. I just smiled...I felt like an expert. Nailed the ultimate horn-job spell first try. He's gonna remember this day his whole life!

 

"I didn't realize he was trying to warn me about something."

 

"Just as I was about to bring him to climax I felt a painful yank on my ear.

"Not a magical yank either...I got grabbed from behind! It was Mr. Buckets the school janitor. He'd come up to mop the hallway and I was so focused on Beetle Brand's dong I didn't even hear him or his squeaky mop bucket come up behind me. Beetle saw him, but I was working his junk so hard he couldn't get the words out to warn me.

We.

Were.

Busted."

 

"We tried to beg Mr. Buckets to let us off with a warning...it was our first time and we PROMISED never to do it again. Yeah, he'd heard it all before. He dragged both our butts to the school disciplinary office and sat us down on the bench to await our doom."

 

"See, the way it goes at Princess Celestia's School, one teacher is in charge of the disciplinary office at a time. There's a schedule...if some professor doesn't have a class to teach they're in charge of discipline for an hour or two. That way one staff member doesn't get stuck doing all the paddling. Mr. Free Verse the poetry teacher was on duty when we arrived. He was a big stallion, so we were both scared out of our wits.

"We had to wait on the bench outside the office while Mr. Buckets explained what he had seen. I tried to apologize to Beetle Brand...this had been my idea and now he was gonna get punished for it. I felt awful, but when I opened my mouth the secretary across the hall shushed me and told us 'No talking!". All we could do was give each other sympathetic looks.

"So Beetle didn't even get to climax? Poor guy probably had blue balls on top of everything."

"Ohhh, no! I hadn't even thought of that! Now I feel even worse about it!"

 

"Anyway, the door opened. Mr. Buckets left and gave us a disapproving look...Mr. Verse came out and scolded us right there in the hallway. He yelled at us for lewd behavior, for violating school standards, about how foals our age shouldn't even know about stuff like this yet. Oh boy...we were miserable and we hadn't even been paddled yet."

"Once he was done lecturing Mr. Verse ordered Beetle Brand into the office first. He gulped...his eyes were already teary. Poor guy. None of this was his idea, he just wanted to hang out in the library and read bug books. It was all my fault and I felt terrible about it but I wasn't even allowed to apologize."

 

"In about a minute it started. There was no doubt what was going on in that office. When I heard that wooden paddle smack his bare rear I almost jumped out of my skin. Poor Beetle couldn't even man-up and take it like a stallion either...he was bawling his lungs out by the second whack and it didn't end there.

"I counted...it was all I could do. You know what a geek I am and numbers gave me comfort while I listened to my friend get his heinie spanked...a spanking that was my fault!

"I wished it would stop at six, but I knew that wasn't realistic.

"I hoped it would stop at ten, but it kept going.

"I expected it to stop at twelve but that terrible paddle kept on smacking Beetle's rear.

"I prayed to Celestia that it would stop at fifteen, but poor Beetle kept on howling.

"Not only did I want his suffering to end...I knew I'd be getting the same punishment in just a few minutes!

"Finally, once Mr. Verse reached eighteen the terrible sound stopped. My friend kept crying for a few more minutes, gradually calming down. His bawling turned into sobs, his sobs turned to sniffles, and finally the door opened.

 

"I wanted to throw myself down and beg forgiveness. This was all my fault.

"But Beetle Brand scrambled past with barely any eye contact. What little I saw in his face wasn't blame...it was shame for the way he'd handled his spanking and for me seeing him this way. I wanted to hug him and apologize with all my heart, but he was gone in a flash. I got a good view of his rump...angry bright pink showed through his brown fur.

"Soon my own purple bottom would look the same."

 

"But Mr. Free Verse didn't summon me into the office. I waited on the bench.

"Soon he came out and I jumped, thinking my doom was near, but he just told me to sit there. So I waited while he had a quiet conversation with the secretary."

 

"An hour passed.

"A few more teachers came to the office but I couldn't hear their conversation. I wanted to put my ear to the door and listen but that secretary was watching me like a hawk. Surely they were talking about me...but what were they saying? Why hadn't I been paddled yet? I didn't want to be spanked, but waiting was pure agony."

"It's because you were Princess Celestia's protégé, isn't it?"

"Yeah, eventually I heard a few whispers and figured that out. The teachers weren't sure what to do about me.

"That just made me worry even more.

"What is the Princess going to say?

"Am I going to lose my position as her personal student?

"Am I going to get kicked out of school?

"What are my parents gonna say? They're gonna figuratively kill me!

 

"I got no answers, only more time to worry. I was tied up in knots, my stomach was doing somersaults. Another hour went by...me sitting miserable on the bench as grown-ups discussed my fate.

"And then my answer came walking down the hall."

 

"All the whispering and debate stopped when Princess Celestia arrived. She didn't say anything to the teachers, just gave them a polite nod, which they returned by bowing.

"Then she leaned down to me, sniffling on the bench.

 

"Good afternoon, Twilight. Are you okay?"

I couldn't really answer, I was too scared and ashamed. I nodded.

"I ran into Mr. Buckets in the hallway and he told me you'd gotten into a bit of trouble."

What could I say? "Y-Yes ma'am."

Princess Celestia never got angry. She just nodded and replied "Well, I suppose giving your first horn-job is a rite of passage for a young filly. But if it is then suffering the consequences when she gets caught is a rite of passage as well."

The Princess stood up straight and announced to all "I expect the school can handle this matter appropriately according to its rules."

 

"And that was it. She gave every pony a nod and continued walking down the hallway.

"Oh boy was I relieved...the Princess wasn't furious at me...I wasn't getting expelled from school...but now I had another problem.

"Mr. Free Verse was gone, he had a class to teach, and now the teacher on-duty was Ms. Inkwell.

"Ms. Inkwell was a wonderful, experienced teacher but she was old-school to the core.

"The school had rules about how many whacks of the paddle were given for each crime but Ms. Inkwell didn't give a flying feather about rules! When a naughty filly or colt got sent to her office they got as many whacks as she felt they deserved, regardless of what the rule book said. Sometimes it was less, sometimes it was more but there was no arguing either way...every student knew arguing with Ms. Inkwell always got you more!"

 

"Satisfied that the crisis was resolved and none of them would be losing their jobs, the other teachers departed. Now it was just me and Ms. Inkwell."

 

"Ms. Inkwell didn't waste an instant. She grabbed my ear and led me straight into that office. The teacher in charge of discipline had a set on procedures to follow, they were supposed to make the unlucky colt or filly bend over a desk and stay there for the regulation number of swats, but not that old mare!

"She dragged a chair into the center of the room, sat right down and dropped me over her lap. Ms. Inkwell made sure I got a good long look at the paddle when she levitated it over...it sent a chill down my spine. There were a few sharp words about how unacceptable my behavior was, that well-raised, well educated young fillies shouldn't be acting like wild tramps and as the Princess' private student my standards should be even higher.

"To be honest, all I was worried about at that moment was my poor tushie.

 

"And oh boy was I right to be worried! As soon as she was done lecturing Ms. Inkwell lit up my rear-end like a bonfire. She must have laid on 5 good whacks before I even had the chance to scream...and every one of those spanks was HARD.

"I'd counted poor Beetle Brand's smacks but there was no counting for me. Ms. Inkwell laid them on so fast that it felt like one continuous spank. Seriously, my butt felt like it was on fire. I honestly have no idea how long it lasted...I was just howling and crying out of control, I couldn't even beg for it to stop. Was it more than 18 smacks or less? To this day I have no idea, I just knew I never wanted to be across Ms. Inkwell's lap ever again!"

 

"Well, eventually it ended, but I don't know when.

"My butt was still on fire a LONG time after she was done. Ms. Inkwell let me cry for a while and catch my breath but she didn't dole out much sympathy. In her estimation I'd gotten exactly what a naughty filly deserved for committing a lewd, unladylike act on a colt in her hallway."

 

"Once I calmed down my next worry was what my parents were going to say about this. Serious trouble in school usually meant a letter home for them to sign, but I was surprised when Ms. Inkwell let me go without one. By then school was over for the day...I looked for Beetle but he was gone, so I went home too."

"I put my robe on as soon as I got home to hide my swollen rump; lucky it was a cold day so my folks didn't question it. For a whole week I worried that the school was going to contact them, but they never did."

"They probably didn't want the parents knowing students were screwing around at in the halls. It would make the school look bad."

"Beetle and I stayed friends, but we never tried anything like that again...in fact I never messed around with another colt until I was grown up and moved to Ponyville."

"But I never forgot the "Ultimate Horn-Job" spell."

"And since your mission is to learn about pony culture, I'd say we ought to give the story a little context..."

 

 

END