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5746 30.35 KB 382
People want Anonymous dead and he is a weird bipedal goat.
By Hu.Created: 2022-12-22 20:51:40
Expiry: Never
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>You are a towering humanoid goat(?), so you must be anonymous.
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>As much as it hurts you, you look exactly like a fuking generic fursona.
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>But hey, things could be much worse.
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>Like being a quadruped with no hands or magic.
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>The magic was nice and all but you wish you still had feet and not cloven hooves.
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>but you guess that when you are reincarnated you can't exactly choose your body.
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>Because you don't remember asking to be born like this.
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>Or maybe god fuck it up since you ended here and all that.
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>But you are losing the point now.
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>The point is that you are living in the "no griffin land" ever since you arrive here in Griffonia.
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>Convicing the close matriarchies and their actual leader was quite the headache, thankfully when you show them and give them treasure, they leave you alone.
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>Where did you get the treasure? it was a tribute that the dragons give you for some reason.
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>why you didn't stay with the dragons?
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>It was true that it was quite nostalgic having in mind how much of an asshole they usually were, but their land was scorched to the point that would be fair to call it a wasteland.
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>And you were not very interested in eating gems for now, and you prefer an actual balanced meal.
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>Fuck, you are rambling again.
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>The point of the point is that you are a good distance to the capital of Griffonia and very close to a very big town.
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>You also were in a good place to go into the dragon lands if you wanted to pay them a visit.
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>Rigth now you were watering your front garden since even if Griffonia was a lot better in the farming industry, they still lack a lot in actual flora.
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>it was true that they were some forests, where you could get some small and big game, but for some reason close to their towns the grass was a lot yellowish and most trees were dead.
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>So you decided to add some green to your lands.
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>And for an amateur, it was ending pretty nicely.
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>It was true you didn't have anything fancy that needed special care but for some reason, the grass and trees that you planted were growing extremely fast and in a perfectly lush green that it was breathtaking.
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>One part of you wanted to fuking know why the fuck did the griffon lands were so "devoid" of life if it was this easy to grow a garden.
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>and the excuse of "There is no water" doesn't probably work, since it literally took you about 2 days to find an underground river with potable water.
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>You file into the "Magic is bullshit" category of your brain since you are too busy actually making a decent home.
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>You may have gone overboard since it is more close to a mansion because of how big are your plans for making it.
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>But if you are correct, it shouldn't take you more than 1 month to finish it.
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>You get out of your trance with a frown on your face.
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>You were pretty sure that you shouldn't have the minimum idea of architecture knowledge, but here you were doing a good estimate in your fairly advanced structure you were doing.
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>...You also shouldn't know how to find an underground river, but you manage that in a pair of days.
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>...Or how to treat stone and wood so your home wouldn't fall apart.
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>Ok, maybe you should have started to question these facts a lot sooner.
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>You shook your head and concentrated on the task at hand (you still had hands, so fuck you.)
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>After all, caring for your garden all alone in silence was pretty relaxing even if it was pretty gay.
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>But having in mind that you were in gay magical land you could probably overlook this.
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>You are a griffon with a crossbow in claw and looking to your objective, so you must be Adelgunda, or Adel for short.
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>You must admit that you really didn't want to take the mission to kill a "cock", no matter how influential he was, but the pretty amount of coin convince you.
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>But now that you see him watering his garden with a smile on his face makes you doubt again.
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>Is true that you hated ponys and how soft they were in general, but seeing a male doing this was quite appealing.
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> His shapely flanks and long legs only made him more attractive
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>his short tail surely wouldn't hide anything if he were to be walking on four legs, and even standing you could see his very toned ass cheeks.
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>You could see it now, you came home after killing a noble bitch and he is watering your garden.
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>You use the same grass and bushes that he grew to hide in until you were close enough.
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>then you pounce on top of him and ride him in the soft lush grass of your weird-looking husbando until he is spent.
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>His fur touching yours, his well-defined muscles very similar to a minitour had no chance of fighting against you even if he wanted.
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>unfff...
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>You shook your head, it was not time to be a horny chick, that was for sure.
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>You prepare the fire bomb arrow and Aim to his head.
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>It was a waste of a good cock in both senses of the word, but you had job to do.
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>At the bare minimum you could give him a quick death.
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>You steady your breath and fire up the arrow...
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>...
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>Then you shoot!
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>The bomb whistle to the air and he looks in the direction of the sound.
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>Big mistake, because now the arrow hits him right in the snout.
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>As the bomb explodes and the grass is set on a blaze, you notice a decent amount of smoke from the explosion covering your sight.
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>You wince, way to go for a pretty face.
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>You still don't move since you wanted to make sure the work was done.
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>At any moment the dust will disappear and you surely would see the body of a colt laying in his own blood, his face if not utterly deformed for the explosion then it would be nothing of it thanks to the direct hit.
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>Any second now...
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>Aaanyy seeecoond noww...
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>...
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>What?
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>the dust finally disappears and you see him.
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>He was not on the ground.
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>he didn't even move from the position.
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>He had his eyes close and he was scrunching his face.
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>His face is intact like it was before.
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>His fur wasn't even scorched.
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>the only thing that was damaged was his watering can.
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>...
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>What?
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>He peeks through an eye and looks around, surprise edge on his face.
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>Then he finally opens the other and furrows his eyebrows.
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>You gulped... Now you probably know why they would have to pay you so much now.
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>You see how he looks at the ground and his eyes open wide, and you can see why, his garden was on fire now.
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>While he runs here and there getting stuff to put out the fire, you start to move away.
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>You were probably gonna try again later... Now you kinda had to make a better plan if a bomb to the face didn't do anything.
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---
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>You are a very annoyed abomination, so you are probably Anonymous.
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>For some fuking reason your face exploded and almost burn down your fucking garden.
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>Aparantly your face can spontaneously combust in a no harmful way to you.
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>That or someone had lights cheap fireworks close to your lands, because you were pretty sure that you should have a bloody face right now.
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>Or maybe being this thing that you are now made you immune to explosion/fire?
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>It would be pretty fair since dragons were literally immune to heat in general.
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>Thankfully, whatever had happened, you manage to save your garden from being a new dragon's land.
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>After taking care of it you fixed the damaged patch of grass and check the surroundings to see if you find the asshole that decided to light up pyrotechnics in your territory.
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> Luckily (for them) you didn't find them.
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>So you decided to archive the event into the "this world is bullshit" part of your brain.
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>Be Anon again after a few days.
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>Your construction had progressed a lot faster than you thought.
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>So fast that you actually decided to do some side things, such as making glass for various uses, like the glass of water that you had now.
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>Again, you weren't sure how did it happen, but the knowledge of how to do it just came to your head... this time you noticed, you were thinking of how nice it would have some and it just came to you, but since you were in guard you felt the sudden change.
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>It was like a lost dark memory that came randomly out of the back of your mind to the front.
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>It felt right that you had it, but you knew how wrong that was.
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>But the more you thought about it the more of a headache you got.
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>So you decided to fuck your brain out when you actually got some alcohol to forget the pain.
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>Right now you were sitting in a chair (that you made) admiring your handy work.
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>By your side, there was a table with a water pitcher and two glasses.
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>You serve yourself more water and drink slowly.
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>Your home was ending pretty neatly if you said so yourself.
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>After drinking half of its contents you stop and hold it by your chest and took a deep breath.
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>This time the water tasted a little spicer than before, but it kinda added to the flavor so you just ignored it.
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>You were not a nature man before, but now you sure were.
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>...If you can still call yourself a man.
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>but that was beside the point.
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>You move again the glass of water to your weird lips with the intent to finish the contents.
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>But when you close your eyes and tilt the glass to drink, your expectations were crushed when you tilt it ninety degrees and nothing came.
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>Confused you open your eyes... to see there was a hole in the bottom of your glass.
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>What?
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>Even more confused you inspected the glass and look down.
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>Sure thing, in your chair and lap where the contents of the glass of water.
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>...
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>Which were slowly eating away the wooden chair that you made with a lot of love.
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>You were so flabbergasted that you just look at it for a good moment, then you look at the table to see that it happen too to the pitcher of water and table.
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>What
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>The
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>Fuck.
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>You are a dumbfounded and utterly confused killing machine, so you are probably Adel.
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>You just saw how the weird bipedal goat cock just drink one of the strongest acids and poison that the black market could offer as it was spicy water.
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>How?
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>Why?
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>...
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>You already put yourself in the line when you came close enough to put the contents of your metal container into his weird pitcher.
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>But Again your plans were destroyed because for some reason he appears that be immune to that too.
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>You are now kinda screaming at your past self for signing up for this mission.
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>You also see how the goat thing just put his weird claw in the middle of his forehead and squeezed, after taking some big breaths he grabs the chair and...
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>He hits the table with enough force to destroy all the things (that includes the chair, the pitcher, and the table), your eyes go wide when you see all the little splinters flying like some kind of homemade grenade.
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>You open your eyes (even more) when he proceeded to split in two the close tree with a swift kick and then grabs it and takes it to what you identified before as his workshop.
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>You really are hating how much your crotch area is heating up right now.
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-----------
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>You just discover that hate building is a thing, so you gotta be Anonymous.
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>And now you are cursing because you didn't pay very good attention.
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>But to be fair, how the fuck should you know that the "potable" water you were drinking was quite acidic.
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>That or the griffons are putting chemicals in the waters to make the frogs gay.
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>Whatever, You didn't feel like the water was making a hole in your stomach so maybe it was more a mistake on your part because you didn't do the glass thick enough.
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>If the problem was another chemical reaction, then you can change the method you use to make them or you could make them more resistant with magic and the power of science.
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>Maybe you should start buying furniture instead of making them, but the big problem is that these fuking bird cats were literally half of your size, which also translates to the size of their furniture.
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>Godammit fuking midgets cats.
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>... Ok, maybe that was going too far, but you were pissed because you needed to make another table and chair.
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>...Wait a moment, did you just kick a tree so hard that you broke it in two?
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>Fuck, you didn't even know you could do that, kinda remind you of those weird people that beat trees with their fist to destroy them.
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>Now that you noticed you were quite strong, but to be fair you literally were born fit, since even over your fur cover body you could still see your well-defined muscles.
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>Whatever, you will finish this and will call it a day.
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---
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>Night "who fuking knows" in griffonia.
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>You are closing your eyes and faking being asleep in a bed that you personally made, so you are probably Anonymous.
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>It has been some days since the table incident, and ever since you change the formula of the glass there has been no accident of literally meltings buttons.
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>What? Why are you only faking sleeping when it is the middle of the night?
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>Simple, Apparently one of the disadvantages of being whatever you are now is that you can't sleep very well. (also there is the fact that the only viable option for sleeping was to sleep face up because of your horns.)
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>It was kinda like your body had an unnatural amount of energy and you didn't need to sleep every day.
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>The problem is that you love sleeping, and you lie to yourself that the basics of sleeping are to stay in bed with your eyes close.
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>Extra points if you are "daydreaming" since you are a word change away from actually sleeping.
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>...surely.
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>With all the power you can muster you shut up your subconscious, and keep faking sleep.
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>You hear your home creak, but you didn't care, you were "sleeping".
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>That was until you felt an itch in your neck.
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>You tried to ignore it since you were "sleeping" but with time the itch got worse.
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>You snorted and decided to move your hand to scratch your neck... weirdly enough, literally once you move your hand the itch stopped in an instant.
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>You frown, but you abort the mission "Scratch your dam neck" and move your hand to its resting place once again.
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---
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>You are griffon in very tight spandex sneaky through your objective home, so you must be Aderyn
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>You got hired since the feather brain of Adelgunda didn't report if the objective was dead or alive, so your job was to verify his death, if he was alive, then you would have the option to finish the job and get her money.
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>You gotta admit it was kinda a cunt move to do, but you would probably give her a share so she will not try to hunt you down... that or she would twist your teats once you meet her to take some drinks the next day.
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>You swear the heart of this chick was in the right place trying to spare a cock by saying that "he is impossible to kill by normal means." or "Believe me, I tried, but he just doesn't die", but you couldn't let your sentiments affect you in this line of work.
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>If you didn't knew her better, you would say that she got a crush on him.
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>Because for flock sake, his home didn't even have locks! what stops her from going to his bedroom and just cutting his throat open?!
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>You of course knew her "Fear" to stain her feathers (the fuking cock), but this was ridiculous.
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>After again checking another door with absolutely no locks in sight, you found his bedroom.
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>He was lying in bed with only a thin bedsheet over him.
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>The movement of his ears made you pause, but he didn't stir in bed, so you started to move again.
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>Once you were close, you gotta admit, for not being a griffin his face was quite an appealing sight to sore eyes.
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>And by the face you meant body.
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>And by body you meant his lower body.
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>You could swear to see a bulge under the covers.
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>You silently shook your head and move closer and draw out a knife.
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>Then you made a small prayer to your pantheon and swiftly tried to make a wide cut in his neck...
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>What?
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>Your blade didn't penetrate his neck...
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>Scratch that, it didn't even cut his fur.
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>What?
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>Flabergaster you look at his neck.
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>Then you look at your knife.
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>Then back to his neck.
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>You then touch your knife with your free claw, and yes, it was quite sharp if the small line of blood in one of your fingers was any clue.
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>after blinking a couple of times, you decided to go for the tried and true method that everyone could do.
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>You tried to stab him.
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>And you gotta remark on the part of "tried"
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>Because once again your incredibly sharp knife didn't manage to even cut one of his treats of fur.
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>You have gotta admit that you lose your mind for a moment, in hindsight maybe you should have tried to stab his eyes.
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>But what the fuck was this thing and why your knife didn't penetrate him?
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>This flocking knife was supposed to even be able to penetrate the scales of an adult dragon and not be just any run-of-the-litter cheap knife.
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>AND BECAUSE OF THAT, IT COST YOU A LOT OF BITS.
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>IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A MEDIUM-GRADE JADE GERDIAN KNIFE GOD DAMMIT.
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>En here you were, not being able to penetrate even a little of his neck.
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>Because you tried, a lot.
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>You were starting to get short of breath because of how many times you have tried to penetrate his neck, but you didn't even manage to get a drop of blood.
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>You were so dumbfounded that you didn't notice that the tip of the knife was fully dull and broken by now.
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>And you almost got a heart attack when he moved.
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>You had to use all your training as an assassin to not let out a totally girly scream, yes you totally were not gonna scream like a simple cock or something.
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>But as he moves his hands up, he stops.
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>Your heart skip a beat at that.
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>Did he notice you?
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>There is no way, right!? after all, you still were controlling the volume of your breathing...right?
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>OMGPLEASEDON'TNOTICEIDON'TWANTTODIELIKETHISPLSPLSPLS.
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>But then he lets out a snort and put his hand back down...
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>Controling the need to pi-... you mean to sweat, yes sweat yourself, you start to slowly move away.
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>You will have to say sorry to Adelgunda for your thoughts.
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>It was true that you could try to stab him in his eyes now since it was the universal soft spot of every living creature, but you really had to pe... sweat right now.
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>And spandex was not the best and filtrating sweat after all.
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---
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>You are anonymous, and by the constant assault of light on your eyes, you could guess it was morning already.
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>You grumble to yourself that maybe you should invest in some curtains, but to be fair the sun was the closes thing you got to a clock, so you will keep it up like that for now.
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>You decided to sit down and stretch while giving a huge yawn.
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>That was until you hear a metallic sound hit your wooden floor.
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>Confused you look down and look at what had fallen.
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>There in the light of a new morning you saw a metallic tip.
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>With more questions than the answer that you wanted, you pick it up and look at it.
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>The weave pattern that reminds you of a shore of a beach immediately made you think it was Damascus steel.
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>But the light greenish color to it made you have second thoughts.
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>Ho good... it happened again, words come to your mind and a light description came "Low-grade King's vane."
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>You immediately tried to resist the slough of knowledge but it was too late.
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>Haflmindly you let out a snort and come back to the situation at hand.
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>From what your brain told you, this was not a thing that was naturally made.
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>You also knew that this thing was too much in a good shape to just be found out in the open without being corroded or straight rusty, since it was of a low grade of a king's vane and all that.
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>In other words there were two options.
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>And you scratch one of them when you saw the closed window.
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>You frown and move to check your doors.
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>And sure enough, you noticed that some doors had signs of tampering.
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>There were low-grade kings vane in your room... with signs that someone was in your home...
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>Probably someone tried to kill you.
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>You shook your head, that was too much of a far fetch answer.
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>Why would someone want you dead? You literally have been living to yourself for the past couple of weeks.
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>And how did they fail if they were using a very good metal?
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>You bit your lip and check once more the piece that you had.
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>Then you try to prick your middle finger with it.
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>No matter how much strength you put in, it didn't penetrate you.
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>That is weird, it should easily get in.
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>"FUCK!"
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> Suddenly when you had that thought, it manage to pierce you.
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>And since you were putting a lot of strength into it managed to puncture you even deeper than you wanted.
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>You started to suck into your finger and be more confused.
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>Perhaps it was just paranoia, but you should probably start to use locks even if you didn't have anything of value to steal...
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>except your money hole, but nobody would be able to get in there.
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>probably.
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---
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>You are tired of being nude, so you are probably Anonymous.
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>When you were about to heal your finger, the wound suddenly disappear once you stop paying attention, it was weird but having hyper regeneration was not that strange... probably.
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> But After finding some gigantic silkworms, you proceeded to plunder their butty (literally) and got enough you actually make some clothes.
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> They did try to stop you, but the greenish liquid that they throw at you didn't seem to have any effect, so you just ignored it.
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>Making a Loom was easier than you expected, maybe it was the weird knowledge that you seem to have about everything, but this time you didn't mind, you would literally kill for some clothes.
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>Since it was quite the fancy material, you decided to make a suit, after all, your name was anonymous (now anyways).
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>Fiding something to dye it was quite hard indeed, but you manage something to dye it white.
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>it would be quite fetching with the color of your fur... or maybe it would just camouflage on it.
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>The point is after breaking your ass off, you finally had a white suit.
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>And ho boy, it felt good to have clothes again.
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>The only reason that you support it until now was that you were alone in your little plot of land, and your very big amount of fur in your lower part hide your dignity very well.
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>But even then you felt weird when other creatures saw you.
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> Especially dragons, since some of them had a very human form, (And maybe you pop a boner one time, but you will deny it if someone asks)
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>(It also was good to see that you still had a very human penis, so you didn't feel too bad about it.)
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>After looking at yourself in the mirror you give a goofy smile while you flex at it.
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>Even if you look like a fucking furry, you look like a very fancy one.
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>Since you were feeling extremely good about this, you decided to pay a visit to the town that was very close to your plot of land.
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>After all, what could go wrong, right?
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>Later in the future, you will hate even thinking those words.
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>After walking away smug like a bug in a rug, you kinda were expecting to have a good day, a great day even.
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>Finally you would visit your neighbors, and you would probably make a good impression with how good you look.
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>After all, the first time you came to their town they actually didn't freak out like the ponys.
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>Or dismiss you for being a male.
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>Or tried to jail you because you were showing "Too much skin." (insulting culture is not your thing, but how in the fuck the people in saddle Arabia spect you to know that a male not covering their body in public/to people that they are not their husband is against the law?)
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>Or give you tribute for no reason (Even if it was nice to have free money.)
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> Their reaction was normal.
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>Most of them didn't even look at you for more than ten seconds, as it was normal to see someone like you in this place.
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>It was nice.
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>Probably as nice as you would get in this weird world.
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>You smile, after so long of just building your home or other stuff, you would finally socialize with another sentient being.
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>You suddenly stop when your ears pick up something.
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>It instantly takes you out of your daydreaming into the real world.
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>was that... buzzing?
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>You blink and look in the direction where the buzzing was coming.
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>what... what in hell is that?
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>they are like little small balls of colors, not bigger than your close fist, and for their size, they have huge eyes, and in their back(?) have a pair of insectoid wings.
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>Normally you would think they are adorable.
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>Exepct there is something wrong with them.
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>From here you could see how their mouth was full of serrated teeth...Is that dried blood in them?
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>Oh fuck no.
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>You started to run away.
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>You didn't know what the hell was that about, but one thing was for sure, today didn't seem like a good day anymore for taking a stroll in that town.
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>...the buzz didn't stop.
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>Ho god pls no.
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>You look at your back, and sure enough, the thing managed to close the distance.
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>And not looking where you were running was a mistake, because you went face-first into a big dead tree.
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>As you come to a sudden stop, you maybe would be surprised that you didn't fall down or that you didn't feel any pain from the collision, that is if were not for the buzzing coming closer.
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>In pure fear you look at how the weird-looking flies close the last distance and swarm you from all sides.
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>You let out a guttural scream and close your eyes expecting to get a world of pain.
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---
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>You are Adeldunga.
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>And after making a plan with the help of your sister or another mister...(even if the feather brain really thinks you were so much of a sun hat tipper that you were going soft against this cock)
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>but that didn't matter, because YOU FUCKING DID IT.
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>All the pain to get one of the most dangerous breeds of parasprite was FUCKIG worth it!
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>These things were known to be able to literally chomp down into anything!
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>You didn't care if the little bugger would make havoc after they were done eating the objective!
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>Because by then it wouldn't be your problem!
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>Once you get all the money you would go to the red district and would get rail up until next fuking week!
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>YES YES YES...
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>And ho boy, it looks like they finish!
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>Because you weren't hearing his scream anymore!
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>You started to prepare the bomb repellent since you actually wanted proof that you finish the job when you suddenly hear a worse scream than before.
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>Your heart skips a beat and you almost drop the repellent, but thankfully in your panic-induced juggling, you manage to save it by one feather from the ground.
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>You would sight in relief if it weren't for the absolute panic and soul-reaching screams that the cock was producing.
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>Talking about screaming cocks, geez.
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>...
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>It may be just your imagination, but you could swear how greenish blood it starting to fall to the ground
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>...And how the amount of the mass of parasprite started to go down.
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>Ho no...
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>Pls no.
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>Please die.
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>And as to answer your question with a NO, suddenly his weird-looking claw came out of the mas and partially grab a pair of the mutated parasprites, but apparently, that was just how much he needed.
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>Becaus once they were in his grasp he clench his hand and absolutely destroy them.
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>...
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>For your gods... you needed a drink right now.
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---
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>You were expecting a new definition of pain a few minutes ago, so you must be anonymous.
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>You felt relief for a moment when you saw the weird insect starting to chomp on you and you didn't feel any pain, so you stop screaming for a moment.
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>At the bare minimum you wouldn't know how it would be to be eaten alive by weird mutated insects...and for some reason, the knowledge about them comes to you, apparently they are parasprites.
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>There was a lot of info that you could digest, but your mind was too busy when it felt something even worse than feeling pain.
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>More than feel it, you hear it.
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>It was the sound of fabric being ripped apart.
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>To be more precise, it was the sound of silk being ripped.
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>You let a scream more stronger than before.
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>But this time was of pure panic.
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> Flailing about hoping to make them stop only seems to make it worse since you help them rip it apart.
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>So you did the best second thing and started to squash them like they insects they were.
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>You must admit that you lose the track of time at that moment.
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>you also didn't notice that you were not being eaten to death since these things weren't able to penetrate your skin or fur.
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>or for the worse part, when you finally dispatch the last of the fucking buggers, you look down, in the hope you maybe would have a suit to salvage.
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>...
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>You didn't.
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>Your expertly made suit was full of holes of different sizes and shapes.
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>80% of it was eaten by these things.
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>The last 20% was absolutely ruined because of the "remains" of the parasprites.
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>You fall to the floor, looking at what was once the only piece of clothes that you had in this crazy nudist world...
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>A lone manly tear(yes, manly.) falls from one of your eyes.
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>ok, maybe was more than one.
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>You just hit the ground with your two fists while you looked down, and said only two words, "God dammit..."
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>After looking at the sky in the most dramatic movements you could muster, you stay there.
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>This is why they didn't use clothes? because there were fucking bug clothes eaters?
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>Why in hell would they evolve into clothes eater buggers!?
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>Why did nobody send you a memo!?
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---
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>You are Adeldunga and of course, a male had to be overreacting because of just a piece of clothes.
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>God, cocks were annoying.
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>After wanting to die, you started to travel to your favorite bar.
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>You really needed a drink.
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---
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>You are cursing reality so you must be Anonymous.
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>This was not really fair and you gotta admit that you went blank for a moment and let your arms fall.
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>But you were conscious enough to see a griffon land in front of you, it had a mailbag in her side, her eyes a moderate turquoise, her fur a kind of Arctic bluish gray while her feathers were just an arctic bluish and cyanish gray head, her chin a light cornflower bluish gray and some light cyanish gray markings, the feather of her wings were dark azureish gray and her talons a beautiful brilliant gold.
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>Her face was full of worry and care.
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>"Oh my gosh! are you ok!?" You just look at her as she gives you a once over, moving your hands here and there.
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>You blink, unsure what to say, but you felt the need to respond, "I...I think so... it's just that my clo..." you stop yourself, you knew very well by now how little the griffon cared at all for others, it was true that she was showing that she was caring enough, but that didn't mean she wanted the full story.
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>Exepct that she apparently connected the dots and gasped, "geez! your clothes! Oh, you poor thing!" Before you could react she took a decent-looking handkerchief and proceeded to try to clean you at the best of her ability, once the handkerchief was ruined she hug you with enough force that a lesser being would have crumbled under her might, "I'm so sorry what happen to you!, is there a way I can be of help!?"
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>She was hugging you...
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>When you still were covert of very gross insect blood and insides.
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>...
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>You blink, hard, and the only thing that came to the front of your mind was "who the fuck is this griffon and why are they so nice?"
by Hu.