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Fracture

By NHanon
Created: 2024-11-05 22:32:39
Expiry: Never

  1. 1.
    >A soft melody reverberates throughout the room.
  2. 2.
    >A bow, drawn across strings creates it.
  3. 3.
    >Although benign to some, it demonstrates its ability to give way to beauty.
  4. 4.
    >At times, it’s a wonder that such a thing could be possible in the world.
  5. 5.
    >Passing thoughts aside, instruments are unique in how they are able to draw out an emotion or two.
  6. 6.
    >Though that in of itself is the nature of music.
  7. 7.
    >And right now, somewhere, out there, a song is being played – performed, recorded, or otherwise.
  8. 8.
    >A number of them will never be heard, save for the exception of the musician themselves who played it.
  9. 9.
    >This current piece is slow, controlled, and gentle in its rhythm.
  10. 10.
    >Each note receives attention, which in turn adds to yet another part of the song.
  11. 11.
    >It’s all done in… practice.
  12. 12.
    >Perfect practice makes perfect.
  13. 13.
    >That lesson was etched in stone.
  14. 14.
    >Music itself, however, is among the few that remain eternal; lasting after the world is long gone.
  15. 15.
    >The musicians who create it, share it, are often called talented, blessed, or even some other word that an observer will feel to befit them.
  16. 16.
    >It’s as though the musician is treated as a magician who’s spells are beyond mortal comprehension.
  17. 17.
    >While flattering, it is not true.
  18. 18.
    >Countless hours are spent in perfecting the craft, yet they do not understand.
  19. 19.
    >Even if it were to be explained in the simplest of terms, nothing would change.
  20. 20.
    >There is no anger to be had about such matters, as they’re ignorant, and ignorance is case of lacking information, which can be learned at a later time.
  21. 21.
    >Wisdom tempers that, like a smith who tempers the blade.
  22. 22.
    >With this current edge played, it too, can cut, though solely in the form of music.
  23. 23.
    >A voice, or sometimes voices, can create it, as well.
  24. 24.
    >Singing, however, is out of your pool of talents.
  25. 25.
    >That leaves this violin.
  26. 26.
    >These passing thoughts always attempt to lead you astray, but they’ve been around long enough to learn how to deal with them for the most part.
  27. 27.
    >Nevertheless, the thought is true – it would be nice to have more skills to rely on.
  28. 28.
    >Time is short, so there is no room for it, sadly.
  29. 29.
    >Life itself is even shorter, therefore what is left has to be spent in mastering the violin.
  30. 30.
    >Some would say, and have said, that has already been accomplished; in addition to saying it is done flawlessly.
  31. 31.
    >That would be incorrect.
  32. 32.
    >To the highly trained (such as yourself), it’s easy to discern it.
  33. 33.
    >Which is why so much effort is given to remove the flaws.
  34. 34.
    >It’s a matter of being better than yesterday, last week, last month, last year, and so on, and so forth.
  35. 35.
     
  36. 36.
    >Perfect, perfect, perfect…
  37. 37.
    >That’s all that’s needed evermore.
  38. 38.
    >Every step must be measured.
  39. 39.
    >Each word uttered from tongue and teeth has to be, too.
  40. 40.
    >And the way the public sees you is especially tricky.
  41. 41.
    >Because all of that has to be done perfectly.
  42. 42.
    >For just as music is practiced to remove flaws, you too, must remove your own.
  43. 43.
    >A thought comes about, one that was heard in passing, “All things are clay brought into the world to be molded into greatness.”
  44. 44.
    >Mother and father were the ones to bring you forth.
  45. 45.
    >Your tutors did the initial refinement.
  46. 46.
    >That altogether, has sculpted you into the mare you are now today.
  47. 47.
    >But, in spite of those efforts, there is still a great distance to cross before you become what you /need/ to be.
  48. 48.
    >These songs are not played perfectly.
  49. 49.
    >The parties have yet to achieve peak perfection.
  50. 50.
    >Those are just two things that have to be taken care of.
  51. 51.
    >Progress is akin to a snail, but that’s due to one, simple, little reason.
  52. 52.
    >You.
  53. 53.
    >Always you.
  54. 54.
    >Mistakes are made, all of which can be avoided.
  55. 55.
    >A grave echo of a snap draws practicing to a halt.
  56. 56.
    >It takes but a mere second to know it didn’t come from the violin, not the room, nor from outside the apartment.
  57. 57.
    >An old memory from the past that remains as a reminder to focus.
  58. 58.
    >Distractions are not supposed to stop practice.
  59. 59.
    >This makes this a mistake; another avoidable one.
  60. 60.
    >By allowing it to happen, it proves how flawed you still are.
  61. 61.
    >Flaws come about unbidden.
  62. 62.
    >You utter a quiet breath with a slow shake of your head, golden bangs bouncing lightly.
  63. 63.
    >Silence holds throughout the dead air of the bedroom.
  64. 64.
    >It is unnerving, wrong.
  65. 65.
    >Every fiber of your being is wound in a tight, container; dressed in equine form.
  66. 66.
    >Part of that is from the mistake made, while the rest is from the upcoming concert.
  67. 67.
    >Despite it being a ways away, it looms overhead, as if it were a thick fog to devour all in sight.
  68. 68.
    >Perhaps a short break can remedy this.
  69. 69.
    >Why, so you can slack off?
  70. 70.
    >No, but staying tense will only make practice more difficult.
  71. 71.
    >That will lead to more flaws.
  72. 72.
    >You cannot afford anymore of those.
  73. 73.
    >Another may just create a… crack.
  74. 74.
    >A crack leads to compromising the whole.
  75. 75.
    >That leads to a simple conclusion – breaking.
  76. 76.
    “No!”
  77. 77.
    >J-just… focus.
  78. 78.
    >Focus and breathe.
  79. 79.
    >A breath in, a breath out.
  80. 80.
    >Repeat.
  81. 81.
    >A breath in, a breath out.
  82. 82.
    >Again.
  83. 83.
    >A breath in, a breath out.
  84. 84.
    >Better.
  85. 85.
    >All things are right where they need to be.
  86. 86.
    >Nothing is wrong, everything is perfectly perfect.
  87. 87.
     
  88. 88.
    >Now, time to take a short break, practice can continue afterwords.
  89. 89.
    >Setting aside your violin, you venture out of the bedroom.
  90. 90.
    >Warm sunlight pours in from the large windows in the spacious living room, bathing everything in great detail.
  91. 91.
    >The world outside bustles with life.
  92. 92.
    >Every so often, a pegasus or two can be seen flying towards destinations unknown.
  93. 93.
    >On the streets below, carriages and various ponies of all kinds are going about their lives.
  94. 94.
    >An audible ticktock comes from the grandfather clock against the wall.
  95. 95.
    >A home warming gift from mother and father.
  96. 96.
    >The face reads a quarter till one; drawing upon a dull pang of hunger from within.
  97. 97.
    >It seems practice overtook lunch.
  98. 98.
    >Unlike most things taught in youth, cooking was entirely learned in solitude.
  99. 99.
    >That was always so very /rare/.
  100. 100.
    >They were simultaneously cherished and despised.
  101. 101.
    >The former, because it was a time to have a breath of fresh air, yet the latter kept it short lived.
  102. 102.
    >Mother and father themselves ensured that.
  103. 103.
    >Speaking of them, they will be expecting a letter soon.
  104. 104.
    >Later, for now, make food and eat.
  105. 105.
    >A couple simple sandwiches are made.
  106. 106.
    >Like most things in life, even the matter of eating was – and is – practiced.
  107. 107.
    >Chew sufficiently, swallow, wipe mouth with napkin, sip some water, then take a small bite, and repeat all over again.
  108. 108.
    >Perfect practice makes perfect.
  109. 109.
    >After eating, the dishes are cleaned.
  110. 110.
    >And of course, this too, is done perfectly.
  111. 111.
    >From there, the letter to mother and father is started.
  112. 112.
    >Soft scratching of quill upon parchment fills the air in addition to the ticking of the clock.
  113. 113.
    >Nestled within reach is a pile of unfinished musical pieces.
  114. 114.
    >While flawed, they cannot be tossed out, as that would be foolish because they can be learned from.
  115. 115.
    >But maybe someday that will change.
  116. 116.
    >For now, the letter is finished in time, containing but a simple update.
  117. 117.
    >Mother and father always want to know the details of your day-to-day life, regardless of what it might entail.
  118. 118.
    >You make your way downstairs to the series of mailboxes.
  119. 119.
    >Upon reaching them, sounds from the world outside bleed in.
  120. 120.
    >Voices, some who shout, others who speak softly.
  121. 121.
    >Clopping of hooves going to and fro.
  122. 122.
    >Doors opening and closing.
  123. 123.
    >Rumbling of carriages.
  124. 124.
    >They come together in a melody of sorts.
  125. 125.
    >Perhaps this could be composed together, and-
  126. 126.
    >That is not how music is made, or did you forget your teachings?
  127. 127.
    >No.
  128. 128.
    >Good.
  129. 129.
    >True music comes from harnessing instruments made by hooves and hearts; voices in harmony to create words in song, and is finalized in the form that the orchestra brings alone.
  130. 130.
    >Any other idea or attempt is foolish.
  131. 131.
    >Both mother and father, your tutors, too, repeated that, over and over.
  132. 132.
     
  133. 133.
    >They stated it as fact, and it remains true forevermore.
  134. 134.
    >Yes, of course.
  135. 135.
    >Are you certain?
  136. 136.
    >Ignoring that thought, you set the letter into the outbox, then retreat to your apartment.
  137. 137.
    >Too much time has been wasted already.
  138. 138.
    >That should not have happened.
  139. 139.
    >By letting it, the path to perfection will take longer.
  140. 140.
    >That is not something you would want, unless… you’re ACTIVELY making yourself further flawed.
  141. 141.
    >The grave echoing snap from before forces you to jolt suddenly.
  142. 142.
    >Breath.
  143. 143.
    >Focus.
  144. 144.
    >Breath.
  145. 145.
    >Good, everything is right.
  146. 146.
    >Back to the bedroom to practice.
  147. 147.
    >Retrieving your violin, you adjust it until it’s perfect, and from there, music fills the space like it did earlier.
  148. 148.
    >Your eyes follow the notes laid out across the pages.
  149. 149.
    >They speak about the song in ways that words can never quite accomplish.
  150. 150.
    >Some have highs, some have lows, yet the beauty remains consistent throughout.
  151. 151.
    >Melody consumes all things; bringing about a heavenly sound that graces those who can witness it.
  152. 152.
    >Perfect practice makes perfect.
  153. 153.
    >Again.
  154. 154.
    >And again.
  155. 155.
    >And again…
  156. 156.
    >It must be done until it is ALL perfect.
  157. 157.
    >Remember what the tutors taught.
  158. 158.
    >Remember what mother and father said.
  159. 159.
    >Nothing else matters.
  160. 160.
    >The end of the song is reached; with that, you exhale a shaky breath.
  161. 161.
    >There’s a subtle stirring inside, but it’s ignored.
  162. 162.
    >This song is important, special even, more so than most others.
  163. 163.
    >From what was read on its history, it was written during a trying time when the composer experienced a great heartbreak.
  164. 164.
    >That’s something you have yet to truly experience.
  165. 165.
    >There was once a face and name in the distant past that was left behind, though.
  166. 166.
    >A blurry face, gray, with a dark mane and tail.
  167. 167.
    >So sad.
  168. 168.
    >So lost.
  169. 169.
    >Yet…
  170. 170.
    >In that moment, the stirring inside grows further.
  171. 171.
    >It swells, gathering in your beating heart.
  172. 172.
    >Much has been experienced, but not enough to fill a lifetime.
  173. 173.
    >On the surface, those amounted to being flawless.
  174. 174.
    >Within, there are fractures.
  175. 175.
    >They’ve been there since forever.
  176. 176.
    >Needless to say, keeping them where they are is difficult.
  177. 177.
    >No pony needs to know about them.
  178. 178.
    >Not your peers.
  179. 179.
    >Not mother and father.
  180. 180.
    >Not a soul.
  181. 181.
    >They couldn’t understand, they wouldn’t.
  182. 182.
    >They’re blind.
  183. 183.
    >They only want you to be perfectly perfect, like it always has been demanded.
  184. 184.
    >Perfect, perfect, perfect…
  185. 185.
    >How can that ever be achieved if there are fractures, though?
  186. 186.
    >Your breathing turns heavy with that thought.
  187. 187.
    >Breath, that will right the wrongs.
  188. 188.
    >A breath in, a breath out.
  189. 189.
    >Repeat.
  190. 190.
    >A breath in, a breath out.
  191. 191.
    >Again-
  192. 192.
    >No.
  193. 193.
    >What-?
  194. 194.
    >NO.
  195. 195.
    >Your violin starts to slip from your grasp.
  196. 196.
    >Focus and breathe.
  197. 197.
    >No, enough of this.
  198. 198.
    >Enough? No, if you don’t do it, you /know/ what will happen next.
  199. 199.
    >This is too much to handle…
  200. 200.
    >Do not be stupid.
  201. 201.
    >A sharper, yet similar echo from before comes about unexpectedly.
  202. 202.
    >Yet, there is no flinching in response this time.
  203. 203.
    >Instead, everything turns standstill.
  204. 204.
     
  205. 205.
    >Silence falls.
  206. 206.
    >Then, all at once, the world shatters into a million-billion, disfigured pieces.
  207. 207.
    >No color, just shades of gray.
  208. 208.
    >No sound, just types of silence.
  209. 209.
    >No soul, just you.
  210. 210.
    >Everything composed is insignificant in this vast, empty world around.
  211. 211.
    >You scream, but nothing comes out.
  212. 212.
    >You cry, but no tears fall.
  213. 213.
    >You move, but remain in place.
  214. 214.
    >You are not you.
  215. 215.
    >A lie, wrapped in a little earth pony form.
  216. 216.
    >It is all but a twisted, torrential storm that sweeps across the landscape, staying as unforgiving as can be.
  217. 217.
    >Even that ends eventually, with peak coming about without warning.
  218. 218.
    >Everything falls dark, quiet even.
  219. 219.
    >Nothingness.
  220. 220.
    >A pinprick of light appears in the middle of all things, followed by a dull, drowned out sound.
  221. 221.
    >Lastly, you come to, Connie.
  222. 222.
    >Pain (both physical and mental) play an orchestra throughout.
  223. 223.
    >You find yourself on the bedroom floor, curled up on your side.
  224. 224.
    >In blurry sight, your violin is within view, seemingly discarded without so much as a single thought.
  225. 225.
    >Music sheets are scatted about, with some being crumpled or torn apart.
  226. 226.
    >Even the bedding, along with any pictures, books, and more have been strewn across the room.
  227. 227.
    >You blink, eyes burning from fires long since dead.
  228. 228.
    >Your breath, lungs ache like they had been pushed to their limits.
  229. 229.
    >In the final act, the crescendo arrives.
  230. 230.
    >No longer are there /just/ fractures inside, within your heart of hearts.
  231. 231.
    >Wider, deeper, uglier, they lie.
  232. 232.
    >Cracks.
  233. 233.
    >It’s been broken.
  234. 234.
    >A choked, pained sob escapes, followed by another, then another.
  235. 235.
    >Where there was once a heavily, musical melody, there is now pained agony.
  236. 236.
    >A symphony just for you.

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