post unfa

 

I usually try to stay classy in everything I do, even with the freedom of expressing my thoughts in a journal. Today I have to break this to make my point:

 

Green can fuck like a machine.

 

And whoever taught her to eat pussy deserves a medal.

 

Still waters still run deep after all, and Green's no exception. Luna, I wish I didn't have to peel myself off of her this morning, the afterglow lasted through both of our dreams. Green was puffed up all day too, she's on top of the world right now. Remember what I said about her being a literal housecat?

 

Being the ruler of your domain while helplessly served your every need, such a comfy life that mare lives. Not that it's undeserved, Green is one of the most tenacious and determined of her kind. However, the cat is still the pet, and that means I have to knock her down a couple rungs. She has no idea that I've got two strap-ons bigger than that, or that Soda and I weren't joking the other night.

 

That's all you're getting for the sexy stuff. Still trying to solve the Misty Meadows case, I've dug and I've dug for what could possibly be screwing with her liver, and the bookshelves are getting thin. She's got no family history of Porphyria, and her hormones are perfect, so what in Luna's name is causing her chronic nerve pain? I'm about to ask Greenie at this rate.

 

Other than that, Rough Rider gave me another handle of moonshine for curing his sprained hoof, but all he did was stay inside yesterday. Oasis made a good wisecrack that we're gonna have to double as a liquor store just so we can clear up some cabinet space. Tomorrow's second Wednesday so we'll hopefully be able to pawn some of it off. Oh yeah, Green's coming too, I love how she sprawled in my cart like a dead plague victim when I brought her home last week. It's so funny how goofy she acts once she warms up.

 

Speaking of plagues, I genuinely suspect shes a narcoleptic. The signs are extremely subtle and at surface level don't look that much different than regular burnout, but more and more signs point to it. She plunges straight into REM sleep essentially any time she closes her eyes on a soft surface, and once you poke her it's like she was awake the whole time. It's always for around 16 minutes too (centering a bell curve from 9-23 minutes, standard deviation of 1 minute, 54 seconds plus or minus for brevity), and once her eyes open it's like she was awake the whole time. Also, and it's a blink-and-you'll miss it, but if Green gets super duper excited her neck and shoulder will vibrate, and only veeeery occasionally a nervous spasm in her cheek. Like any energetic pegasus, she'll usually take flight and do a nice loop de loop.

 

Oh, and for the snoopers, yes I have watched Green sleep enough to figure this out, who wouldn't want to stare at the cutest mare in the world?