A Royal Shootout

It was a sunny day in Equestria after Celestia raised the sun for the day. Princess Luna, having finished her work with checking in on everypony’s dreams, decides to go rest for the day. But, before she went to rest, she saw the sun Celestia rose. Suddenly, she began to remember how she rebelled against her sister by refusing to lower the moon to let her raise the sun and, how she turned into Nightmare Moon only to be banished for 1000 years. Her pleasant smile slowly transformed into a nasty frown while thinking about how awful it was for her on the moon. She said to herself “Thou Celestia was a bitch!” and then proceeded to say “We mustn’t succumb without enforcing revenge”. Now, her frown transformed into a nasty scowl showing all her gritted teeth. “We must partake in our revenge plot today!” she shouted. Now, as she was thinking about all these things, she remembered that she had a gun hidden from Celestia in her room. Her scowl in a heartbeat turned into a wicked smile and, she laughed in a twisted way saying “Thou Celestia shall see thou weaponry in thine royal posterior!” but, as she was about to say her next sentence, she thought of something even more evil. Then she said, “Thou Celestia’s school for gifted unicorns! We thinketh of thou perfect plan!”. And with that, she went into her room, got her gun and flew to Celestia’s school.

It was a regular Tuesday at the school with all the fillies and colts coming inside to take their usual classes. Little did they know about the horror that awaits them. Celestia walked across the hallway with regality and, softly told all the students “Alright then my prized pupils. Today we shall learn Magic!”. All the fillies and colts jumped up and down on their little hooves eagerly awaiting class. When all the fillies and colts entered the class, Luna entered the school building with her gun, all loaded on ammunition. She walked through the hallway with her gun with an evil smile and, when she reached the classroom, Celestia gasped as she looked at her younger sister and then she shouted “LUNA! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE WITH THAT WEAPONARY!” but, Luna just stood still without saying a single word as her evil smile grew.

Finally, she said “Thou revenge has arrived” and, in a flash she began shooting up Celestia’s classroom with her gun. Bullets were flying everywhere and they hit every filly along with every colt. When all the students were dead with blood and organs splattered along with a bunch of broken shit everywhere, Luna turned her head to Celestia and said “Our Big sis shall taste lead!”. Then, in an act of defiance, Celestia stomped her hoof on the ground and then screamed at Luna in her face while saying “LUNA! I THOUGHT YOU HAVE CHANGED! I’M VERY DISAPOINTED IN YOU. I’M AFRAID THAT BANISHING YOU TO THE MOON FOR 1000 YEARS WASN’T ENOUGH FOR YOU! YOU LEAVE ME WITH NO CHOICE BUT TO SHOOT YOU! YOU DON’T DESERVE TO BE CALLED MY SISTER!” Luna smirked and then said to her “Alright Sister, we must go to Appleloosa for a wild west shootout! Does thou sound fair?” Celestia paused for a second to think and then said bluntly “Okay Luna, I’m ready to go to Appleloosa. TO BRING MY GUN AS WELL SO I CAN SHOVE IT UP YOUR ROYAL POSTERIOR! YOU KEEP YOUR PATHETIC LITTLE GUN WITH YOU; I’M GETTING MY BIG ASS GUN!” And with that, they both agreed to go to Appleloosa for the ultimate shootout and flew out of they now destroyed school to get prepared.

Now, on that same day, Applejack was leaving Sweet Apple Acres to come visit Appleloosa by herself so that she can see her cousin Braeburn and, neither her nor any of her friends have heard of the recent events. Applejack was looking out of the train window and she thought to herself “I’m really looking forward to seeing my cousin Braeburn in his sweet home town of Appleloosa! I’m sure everything will dandier than freshly made zap apple jam!” Now, as the train was moving, Luna and Celestia were getting ready and, when the train finally reached Appleloosa, both sisters were ready for the ultimate wild west shootout of their lives! However, the sisters did a horrible mistake that will cost them everything when they finished preparing, as they decided to have the shootout right next a spot that Applejack was going to visit in the town!

So, as Applejack was trotting out of the train, she stumbled upon Braeburn who was waiting for her. “Yeeehaaa It's my best cousin! Applejack” Braeburn happily cheered with a big smile on his face at Applejack when he saw her at the train station. Applejack then modestly replied “Aww shucks Braeburn, you really think so?” Braeburn then quickly snapped back in a happy tone “I know so Cousin! Yeeehaaaa! We have quite some time to spend!”. Applejack and Braeburn then trotted out of the train station to make it to town. Applejack asked Braeburn “Alright Braeburn, what do you wanna do first?” To which Braeburn responded without hesitation with a big smile “Oh Cousin, why don’t we check the rodeo that everypony is hollering about? Applejack’s pleasant little smile grew into a rather excited face and she said “Well color me pleased as punch! Where’s this gosh darn rodeo?” Braeburn then pointed to the west of the town and then confidently said “Over there Cousin!”. They then ran over to the western part of town.

Now, little did they know that the princesses were having a shootout right next to the place of rodeo. Thankfully, the two sisters were far-enough west from the rodeo to not make anypony notice them. Now they were having the ultimate shootout with bullets flying everywhere with the overwhelming noise of constant gunfire as they tried to shoot each other while dodging each bullet they fired at each other, with Luna shouting “Thou sister shall leave with thine bullet in the royal posterior!” to which Celestia quickly snapped back “You’ll taste of bullet of Celestia’s righteousness!”. Meanwhile, Applejack and Braeburn were watching the rodeo when Applejack suddenly seemed to be the only pony to notice a faint noise from the far west to which she asked her cousin “Braeburn, do you know what in the hay that noise is?” to which he bluntly replied “It sounds like faraway shootout to me!” Applejack stopped focusing on the rodeo and a deeply troubled expression grew on her face to which she then said “You stay here Braeburn, I must check in on what in the name of oats ‘n apples is going on there!”. She then exited the rodeo and ran west without haste, only to see the two royal princesses having a massive gun fight.

At that moment, her troubled expression grew into a face expressing pure rage with her mouth now showing all her gritted teeth with the nastiest scowl anypony could ever see. Then she screamed at them “WHAT IN FUCKING TARNATION! Y’ALL ARE THE TWO ROYAL SISTERS! WHY ARE Y’ALL FIGHTING LIKE A BUNCH OF TIMBERWOLVES! THAT’S ENOUGH NOW!” She then ran back as quickly as possible on her hooves back to Appleloosa to get two lassoes and then, she returned to wrangle and tie up the two princesses to the sandy ground. She then snarled at then angrily saying “I think y’all have earned your punishments!” then, with all her earth pony strength, she slapped the royal asses of both Luna and Celestia a thousand times for each posterior until each one was sore as they were tied up on the desert ground. Luna then squealed in pure pain as she cried “P-please h-halt the punishment. We’ve both been very very naughty. We earned thine punishment!” then, Celestia said “Yes, my sister is right this time. Please stop it Applejack! It hurts so bad!”

Applejack then said in an authoritarian tone to them “Y’all just couldn’t behave yourselves! Do something this foolish again and I’ll bring my cousin to ass rape y’all! And, he won’t be using any fancy-shmancy lube to do it!” To which Celestia cried out loud while screaming “Okay Applejack, Okay! We promise won’t fight again! Just don’t bring your cousin! Please!” Applejack then smirked knowing she taught them well and then told them “Now, that’s more like it! I’ll untie you two right now! Fight with each other like Timberwolves again, and I promise y’all will be bleeding out of your royal asses from Braeburn’s ass raping!”

She untied them and then they flew away without haste as quickly as possible from Appleloosa out of fear of Applejack and her cousin. Ever since then, Equestria has been in total peace due to the two princesses fearing over ever fighting with each other ever again. Knowing the consequences Applejack would have for them if they ever decided to go against each other ever again. Finally, over time, they finally began to slowly warm up to each again with Celestia forgiving Luna for her school shooting and with Luna finally understanding that taking revenge for what happened a long time with her sister probably wasn’t the best solution in the long run. Then, they finally lived together in peace and harmony with Celestia raising the sun, along with Luna raising the moon without any bad blood between them.