GREEN
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1660 9.2 KB 187
1660 9.2 KB 187
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>When you awoke this morning, you felt tired and oddly, sad.
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>That doesn’t make sense.
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>Where is all that energy you had?
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>Even more odd, you slept in.
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>You head downstairs and grab the mail.
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>Don’t even bother with looking through it until you reach your apartment.
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“More of the same. Eri hasn’t written me back. Nor have some of the friends I wrote.”
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>’Looks like they’re ignoring you.’
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“I didn’t do anything to them, I’ve been a good friend.”
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>’When was the last time you talked to them face to face?’
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“I...I have been busy, that’s all.”
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>’Couldn’t make the time to see if they really needed you?’
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>You shake your head.
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“Need to stop talking to myself.”
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>Your movements are a little sluggish.
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>Just tired, that’s all this is.
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>You brew up a cup of tea, should help wake you up more.
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“I can practice in the meantime.”
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>As you’re looking through your music, you don’t see any that catch your eye.
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>In fact, it feels like you lack the motivation to even play.
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>You rub face briefly and hear the kettle whistle.
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>Getting up, you make a cup of tea.
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>While normally it’s good, it doesn’t raise your spirits much.
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“I think I’m sick or something.”
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>You set aside the cup and head to the bathroom.
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>A quick check with the thermometer reveals a normal temperature.
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“Okay, then I’m just tired.”
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>You head back to the living room and do some light stretching.
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>Even that doesn’t seem to help.
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>Panic slowly brews within you.
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“It’s okay, I have been pushing myself hard. Six hours of practice a day will do that. Not to mention barely getting three hours of rest.”
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>’And you thought that was a good idea?’
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>You shake your head, and sit down to play.
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“I’ll just force myself, I can’t sit around and do nothing.”
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>Though you try, the music doesn’t come out right.
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>It’s comparable to cats yowling.
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>Your frustration reaches a peak.
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“Alright fine! I’ll go get some pills from the store, review the pieces, and then go to the concert.”
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>Grabbing some bits and your saddlebags, you head out.
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>Thankfully it’s not too crowded out.
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>You can see some clouds are being brought in for the storm.
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>Probably should read the paper on when that is.
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>For once, you don’t bother saying hello to ponies you pass by today.
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>You’re just like the rest of them now, ignoring ponies.
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>Only one thing is on your mind, get some energy pills to make it through this evening.
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>Fortunately, the store has some, though you buy a couple of bottles.
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>It’s not like you used these before.
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>The trot back to the apartment was just as quick, but unfortunately leaves you little time to review.
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>Not to mention, you still haven’t practiced.
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>Your mood dampers further as you realize all of this.
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“Great, can it get any worse?”
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>You take some pills with your tea.
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>It’s hard to focus on the pieces, but you manage and head back out to the streets.
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“Just get a taxi, I can’t be late, I must be early.”
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>You hail a taxi and climb aboard.
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>Along the way, your mind wanders again.
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>I don’t remember eating anything bad to have caused this.
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>’You’ve been eating very little.’
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>That’s true, I also haven’t been around any sick ponies.
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>’None that you know of.’
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>It’s not like somepony would that to me intentionally.
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>’Not everpony likes you, no doubt some would hurt you.’
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>You shake your head.
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>Everything feels so negative.
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>You arrive and pay the driver.
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>As you hurry inside, you see you’re early and breath a sigh of relief.
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>”Something the matter Connie?”
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>You jump and turn to see Friedrich looking at you.
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“It’s nothing, I’m just a little tired, was worried about running behind.”
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>He nods before heading off to the dressing room.
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>What’s gotten into you?
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>You finish getting into your dress, with some difficultly.
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>And you look for Feather to talk to.
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>That should help ease you.
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>She just finished talking with another pony.
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>’Bet they’re talking behind your back.’
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>You shove that thought aside and approach her with a smile.
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“Hey there Feather.”
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>She smiles back and turns to face you.
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>”Hi Connie, I’m ready for tonight.”
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“So am I, we can have another flawless show.”
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>As she nods, you start to feel more energetic.
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>That doesn’t quell the growing sadness within.
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>It hopefully won’t impact your playing too much.
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>”Are you okay, you’re a little quiet.”
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>You shake your head and beam brighter at her.
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“Yeah, I’m fine! Everything is fine.”
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>’Liar.’
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>Feather looks a little concerned, but nods.
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>”Okay, if you say so. Looks like we should be getting ready then.”
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“Yeah, just give me a moment, going to get a drink before we start.”
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>She heads off and you go grab some water.
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>You can do this Connie, you’re just tired.
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>Heading out, you join the rest for tuning.
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>Like yesterday, Quiet joins you all shortly after.
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>After the applause, she turns towards you all and begins once more.
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>As you play, you are having difficultly focusing.
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>It feels like your hooves are heavy.
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>Each draw a struggle.
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>It starts to get to a point where you’re fighting against this lack of energy.
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>No, lack of motivation.
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>Thankfully the first half ends, and you feel some relief.
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>That doesn’t settle this horrible feeling within you.
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>Friedrich approaches you quickly.
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>”Is something the matter Connie?”
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>You force a smile to him and shake your head.
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“I’m fine, why do you ask?”
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>His eyes bore into you.
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>”Are you sure? Because I am certain you’re not playing on point tonight.”
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>Is it really that obvious?
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“I assure you, I am fine. I might be a little tired, but that won’t get in the way of playing.”
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>He slowly nods, but is clearly unsure of you.
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>As he leaves, you go see Feather.
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>Just distract yourself Connie, everything is fine like you said.
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“Hey there, still holding up?”
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>She looks a little surprised, but quickly shifts to a bright smile.
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>”Mhm, I am certain I can do this.”
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>You feel happy for her.
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>If only you could say the same for yourself.
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“That’s wonderful to hear, told you could do it.”
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>Feather nods enthusiastically.
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>”Thank you again Connie. You’ve helped me so much.”
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>A feeling of pride swells up, pushing aside the sadness for now.
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“You’re welcome Feather, I’m more than happy to hear that.”
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>”I know we haven’t been friends for long, but I am happy that we are.”
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>For the first time tonight, you give a real smile.
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>As the others return to their seats, you part ways for now.
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“Time to finish the final act, good luck.”
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>”You too.”
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>You take your seat and try to steel yourself.
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>After everything today, you will finish this right.
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>The second half starts off strong, with you putting everything forth.
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>Sadly, that isn’t as well as you would like.
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>You’re still fighting yourself to play at one hundred percent.
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>As the last piece dies down, you feel worried.
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>While there is applause, this concert wasn’t as good as yesterday.
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>You leave with the others.
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>Along the way, it’s hard to focus.
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>You feel tired and your heart feels heavy.
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>As you reach the dressing room, Feather stops you.
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>”Connie? Are you alright? You didn’t answer me.”
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>You shake your head and try to smile.
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“I’m fine, just really tired.”
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>She looks concerned.
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>”Oh okay, had me worried for a second there.”
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>Should you bring it up to her?
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>’No, she will probably think you’re being melodramatic.’
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“Yeah, it’s okay. I probably look bad, but I am fine really.”
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>She nods, and you get out of your dress.
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>Just need to go home and sleep this off.
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>Everything will be fine.
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>You go talk to Feather before you leave.
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“I’ll see you for tomorrow’s final concert Feather.”
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>She turns to you and smiles.
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>”See you tomorrow as well Connie.”
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>Your legs feel heavy, you’re feeling worse.
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>’That concert could’ve been better.’
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>I know it could’ve.
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>The Manehattan night greets you as you step outside.
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>It briefly refreshes you, but leaves you cold after.
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>More clouds in the sky, storm is likely tomorrow.
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>You get a taxi and feel blank on the ride home.
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>Why? You shouldn’t feel this way.
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>The taxi stops, when did you even get here?
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>You push aside this growing numbness and pay the driver.
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>Your apartment looks the same as ever, if only a little more dark.
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>The ground is starting to look more interesting.
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>You sigh as you make your way up to your apartment.
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>As you enter, you call out to the empty place.
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“I’m home.”
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>No replies, of course you’re alone.
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>’You don’t make time for others, only when it’s convenient for you. Why would anypony want to be around you?’
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>A flame of rage hits you.
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“NO!”
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>You look around, chest heaving, heart racing.
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>Slowing your breathing, you go splash some water on your face.
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“I’m just a little stressed and tired is all.”
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>Your reflection looks back, your eyes are puffy and you look a little pale.
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“When did that happen?”
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>’You’ve always looked like that.’
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>Shaking your head to push away these thoughts, you grab some sleeping pills.
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“Just need to get some sleep is all. I’ll be fine tomorrow.”
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>Though you lie in bed feeling tired, it takes a while for you to finally fall asleep.
by NHanon
by NHanon
by NHanon
by NHanon
by NHanon