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[RGRE] Like a Good Neighbor, Starlight is There

By Uh-hmmm
Created: 2021-07-16 21:31:33
Updated: 2021-01-20 04:25:07
Expiry: Never

  1. > You are Starlight Glimmer, concerned about Twilight Sparkle
  2. > Despite her fame and position, or perhaps because of it, she doesn't have a coltfriend
  3. > Worse, in the past couple of days, she's been acting odd
  4. > Personally going to the post office and teleporting directly to her room
  5. > Watching Spike closely and taking notes while he cooks
  6. > And today, Hearts and Hooves Day, she ordered everyone to vacate the Palace of Friendship
  7. > You were worried she would take advantage of Spike, but you saw him hanging around the boutique
  8. > That just leaves summoning an incubus
  9. > As somepony who had abused magic in the depths of loneliness, you owe it to Twilight to keep her from falling into darkness
  10. > Hopefully this won't take too long, you do have a date planned with Sunburst
  11. > You slip past the ward set at the entrance to the palace, modulating your aura to match Sparkle's
  12. > Then it's a simple matter of casting a modified cloud walking spell to silently trot up the stairs to her private chambers
  13. > She's been cagey about letting you in there before, and you had ascribed it to her need to schedule everything
  14. > Now, you aren't so sure
  15. > You crack open the door and take a sniff
  16. > No sulfur, so she hasn't summoned the incubus yet
  17. > The scent is a little musty, with a noticeable cheese aroma
  18. > You ease the door open
  19. > Unaware, Twilight levitates a spoon to the mouth of a My Industrious Human plush
  20. > "Here you go Anon, it's your favorite! Mac and cheese, made with milk fresh from my teats."
  21. > You can only stare in horror as she prods the fabric of the plush's mouth with the spoon, then pops it into her mouth
  22. "What the actual buck."
  23. > Twilight's head whips around to look at you, her pupils shrinking to pin pricks
  24. > "I- uh,"
  25. > Glance around, seeing MIH posters covering her walls, figurines posing on the shelves of her bookcases, a jar half filled with a cloudy liquid, a green figur-
  26. > "You have failed me for the last time, my apprentice!"
  27. > Oh Celestia, please not her Stellar Insurrection roleplay
  28. > You break the shaky telekinesis trying to choke you
  29. "Twilight, stop it. I know you're embarrassed, but it's not the end of the world. We both know what that looks like, right?"
  30. > She groans
  31. > "Shut up you normalnag! Don't you have a coltfriend to go be disgustingly happy with?"
  32. > You sigh
  33. > You really don't want to do this
  34. "The circle is now complete. When you sent me to Canterlot to reconcile, I was but the learner; now I am the master."
  35. > Twilight scrunches harder than she has ever scrunched before, her face a mass of wrinkles and disdain
  36. > "Are you threatening me, Master Normalnag?"
  37. > You raise an eyebrow
  38. "That doesn't even make sense."
  39. > "S-shut up!"
  40. > You sigh again
  41. "Look, I know it's hard finding a colt who isn't a golddigger, but this can't be healthy."
  42. > Twilight lifts her chin
  43. > "My love for Anonymous is true and pure!"
  44. "Is that what Cadance says?"
  45. > Twilight doesn't meet your gaze
  46. > You gingerly step into the room
  47. "If anypony can help you, she can."
  48. > Your friend clenches her jaw
  49. > "It's not that easy. She can check compatibility and encourage ponies to be honest about their feelings, but that's it. No way of finding my true love or anything like that."
  50. > Your heart sinks
  51. > You hesitantly pat her on her withers
  52. "I'm sorry, I didn't know you had already talked to her about it."
  53. > Twilight doesn't say anything
  54. > You frown
  55. > This isn't helping her, time to change the subject
  56. "So, My Industrious Human, huh? I hear good things about it."
  57. > Sparkle rolls her eyes at your "subtle" transition, but goes along with it
  58. > "There's a lot to like, and something for everypony."
  59. > She turns a speculative eye on you
  60. > "If I turned you to the ape side, you'd be a powerful ally..."
  61. > Well, at least she's feeling better
  62. "I tell you what, I have some time before my... thing. Where do we start? I've seen a lot of porn for the slate game, it might be nice to get some context for it."
  63. > Twilight snorts
  64. > "Yeah, no. Not unless you want to lose half your bits in Builder Raffles. Honestly, I think the best starting point for you is one of the early spin offs, the one marketed towards little colts. You might recognize some things from your friendship lessons."
  65. > You aren't thrilled to have to watch a show for little colts, but it's for a good cause
  66. > Twilight shuffles through her crystal grid and plucks one to slot into the illusocaster
  67. > An image forms on the far wall, text that reads, “Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood” floats over small model houses as a xylophone plays
  68. > How do mares even like this colty stuff?
  69. ----
  70. “I’m a bad mare.”
  71. > Twilight nods in mock solemnity
  72. > “Yes you are. We all are.”
  73. “He’s, like, the perfect father, gentle, patient, nurturing…”
  74. > “Not to mention channeling his whimsy into telling creative stories that teach moral lessons.”
  75. > You bite your lip
  76. “They HAD to know what they were doing, starting and ending each episode with changing his clothes and shoes. Practically flaunting his socks and those long, foal-chasing legs.”
  77. > Your evil friend pats you on the withers
  78. > “There were some cultured gentlemares making the show, for sure.”
  79. > You take deep breaths and try to will the fire in your belly to die down
  80. “And I have an hour before I am going to be taking my coltfriend on a romantic date. He’s going to be smirking at me the whole time, teasing me about being a frisky mare who only wants one thing.”
  81. > Twilight frowns at you
  82. > “That’s what you get for being a normalnag. If you’re going to whine about that, get out of my room.”
  83. > You glance at the clock again, then turn towards her
  84. “I probably should. I...I don’t think I will thank you for corrupting me with your ape stuff, but it was kinda fun hanging out.”
  85. > Twilight gives you a wry smile
  86. > “I had fun too. Good luck on your date, and try not to think of socks.”
  87. > You groan, and charge up your horn to teleport
  88. > Maybe not directly to the Crystal Empire, you have some last minute shopping to do
  89. ----
  90. > You are Sunburst, Royal Crystaller, pretty handsome, and coltfriend to one of the most powerful unicorns in Equestria
  91. > Which is why you had so much fun trying to make her tail flag in the restaurant
  92. > The poor mare was clearly affected by the holiday atmosphere, and you did your best to keep her distracted
  93. > But as the day turns to night, it is time to pay the piper
  94. > Not that you particularly mind, Starlight can do the most wondrous things with her magic
  95. > You set your clutch wallet on the side table as your marefriend follows you into your home
  96. > “Sunny, I have something for you…”
  97. > You had been looking forward to that as well
  98. > You turn and grin as you accept the bag she had been dragging around all evening
  99. “Aw, now I feel like a bad coltfriend, I didn’t get you anything. Maybe I can give you something else...”
  100. > You lift the contents into the air in a levitation field
  101. > It’s a teal button-down sweater and a set of shiny black hoof covers
  102. > You can’t help but smile in wonder
  103. “These are perfect! Now I won’t have to worry about messing up my mane when putting on layers, and these hoof covers are so elegant!”
  104. > There’s an odd hunger in Glimmer’s eyes as she perks up at your reaction
  105. > “Why don’t you put them on, and we’ll figure out what I get in return~”
  106. > You bite your lip at the tone in her voice
  107. > It’s going to be a wild night, and you are nearly as impatient as she is
  108. > You give her a show as you slide your hooves one at a time into the sleeves of the sweater
  109. > She is visibly flagging as you button up from the bottom, leaving your tuft to peek out from the top
  110. > You barely have time to slip into your new hoof covers before she pounces
  111. > You love Hearts and Hooves day
  112. ----
  113. > Cadance sits before a massive corkboard full of pictures, pins, and strings
  114. > Shining lays wrung out behind her, a delirious smile on his face
  115. > She carefully wraps a purple string around three pins to make a triangle
  116. > She cackles to herself
  117. “Soon… soon…”

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