- >The chilly late night air nips at your ears; small puffs of breath escape your nostrils.
- >In hindsight you should’ve opted for a coat or at least a hat instead of just a scarf.
- >You pull it higher and tighter around your muzzle as a shiver courses through you.
- >Not like you make good decisions anyways.
- >You’re Miss Eri after all, the saddest pony in Equestria.
- >More like the entire world…
- >Most avoid you after the first meeting and not that you blame them either.
- >You tend to be a bit… grim, so to speak.
- >If Equestria is a canvas of beautiful colors, then you’re the ugly gray smudge of a mistake.
- >Never asked to be like this.
- >Heck, you’d avoid yourself too if you could.
- >Enough with the loathing, that is not why you are out here tonight, you do enough of it at home.
- >You’ve chosen this rare occasion to escape yourself.
- >One of the few times where you venture from home voluntarily.
- >The windows of the homes you pass are darkened, ghostly in their appearance.
- >Their occupants safely tucked away in a peaceful slumber.
- >Often blessed with being surrounded by the ones that they love and love them back.
- >Don’t have that yourself
- >A rare few homes have a sole light on inside, likely a night owl or some pony trying to do something.
- >Or in your case, a night walk.
- >And what a night is.
- >You keep finding your attention drawn to the sky as you trot through the streets.
- >Some wispy clouds lazily drifting across it, but for the most part it is clear.
- >Stars twinkle ever so high above and the moon bathing the land in a gentle glow.
- >Even with her return, Luna’s night is still underappreciated.
- >It’s all just...
- “Beautiful.”
- >One of many ways to describe such a sight like this.
- >Such a strong word at that, one you try not to overuse like many do, much like the word love.
- >Feels like you could spend a lifetime writing poetry on the night itself and still have more to write.
- >You’re never going to be a great poet though, not that you intend on stopping.
- >It has always been a way to express yourself: both deep and personal thoughts; feelings laid bare upon paper.
- >Even if no other ever sees them, they exist as a mark of yourself upon this world.
- >One like all things will eventually fade away with time.
- >You’ve reached the park at last and are getting closer to your final destination of this walk.
- >Lamps light the way, the few benches scattered along the path coated in dew.
- >In the distance unseen but heard by your ears are crickets and other insects calling in the night.
- >At times it aligns into a symphony that could soothe one’s soul.
- >Despite the light of the moon, almost everything is faded out in a reflection of your reality.
- >As you pass by the pond, you recall when you would come here with your parents as a filly.
- >Things were better back then, life was so much more full of vigor.
- >Had friends, went out more, and even felt confident.
- >What happened to you Eri?
- “I changed.”
- >You weren’t like the other foals your age.
- >Didn’t smile or laugh as much, though did you more than you do now.
- >That is to say-
- >No, not again.
- >You’re letting those thoughts you were trying to escape pull you down.
- >Always trying to drown you in them, falling deeper and deeper into the black abyss.
- >You try to ignore them and focus back at the journey at hoof.
- >Going to have to deal with them later when you get home.
- >Thankfully you don’t have much more to travel as you reach the end of the path.
- >Growing up, many would say that the woods were dangerous at night.
- >While there are many things unseen in the dark with shapes that aren’t really there, they’re nothing compared to your inner turmoil.
- >It’s like a sick sort of peace.
- >As you step on a twig and it snaps, a bat flies overhead squeaking.
- >You shake your head, don’t need anything else to add to this stereotypical spooky atmosphere.
- >The clearing is up ahead, then you’ve got a hill to climb.
- >You remember how you found this place.
- >It was when you were younger and still living with your parents.
- >You were running, mostly from yourself and home.
- >Didn’t want anypony to find you, so you ran into these woods.
- >That was a poor choice because you immediately got lost and your sorrow was replaced with terror.
- >The woods themselves felt like some kind of monster trying to claw and drag you into it’s maw.
- >Stumbled about for who knows how long in the dark of night.
- >A rare smile crosses your face as you remember your naivety.
- >Almost at the top, not much further.
- >Eventually you had found the clearing by random chance.
- >You were whimpering like some foal, galloping up that hill and coming to a stop once you realized it ended in a cliff.
- >As you looked down, a part of you begged to jump down and be done with the torment at last.
- >Still swear the abyss below called to you in it’s sweet melody enticing you so.
- >But you didn’t.
- >You hesitated for some reason.
- >Fear, the will the live? You’re not sure.
- >What you are sure of is that as you stood there, you saw the place had an amazing overlook of the land below.
- >Speaking of which.
- “Finally here at last…”
- >Been here many times since that day and your breath still hitches like it did then.
- >A calmness had washed over your young self as you looked at it all, eventually falling asleep from exhaustion.
- >When you woke in the morning, you made your way home.
- >Things didn’t exactly improve from there (no pony knew you were gone), you returned here every so often.
- >You sit down on the edge, letting your legs hang off, eyes slowly going across the land.
- >In the distance is the city of Canterlot, though it’s not very visible right now.
- >Never been there and likely never will.
- >None of the houses below are lit up anymore, it’s all completely dark.
- >All the hustle and bustle of the day extinguished and replaced by the calmness of night.
- >If you lived in a large city like Manehatten, you’d lose out on something like this.
- >Hold a second.
- >Are you actually having a good time right now and enjoying yourself?
- >Well maybe… a little.
- >Doesn’t mean that you’re not allowed some of it dammit, even if it’s in very small doses.
- >But it won’t change who you are, what you are.
- >Tomorrow you’ll rise and still be the same as you were today and yesterday.
- >Same as the previous weeks, months, years...
- >Still will be lonely, miserable, and tired from life.
- >You’ll likely scream, cut, cry, write, and languish about in agony.
- >That doesn’t mean you can’t be allotted this tiny moment right here, right now.
- >For a time you sit there, taking in everything you can.
- >Puffs of breath linger in the air as you exhale slowly and you shiver, a reminder of the chill.
- “Should’ve worn a jacket idiot.”
- >You sigh and close your eyes for a moment.
- >Better off going home and beating yourself up rather than doing it here.
- >A part of you begs to stay, to curl up and die here, to have this place as your final resting place.
- >But you can’t do that, it won’t work.
- >Because you’ve tried before.
- >A few times actually.
- >You sniffle and shake your head, some tears had crept down your face.
- >Can’t escape yourself here it seems.
- “So stupid.”
- >Wiping them away and getting up, you start making your way back.
- >These walks always feel so fleeting and too abrupt.
- >Maybe one of these times you can take a longer one.
- >One that you could travel for as long as forever.
by
NHanon
by
NHanon
by
NHanon
by
NHanon
by
NHanon