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Scootaloo is Too High [RGRE, /pj250/]

By Diligence
Created: 2021-07-16 21:31:33
Updated: 2021-06-12 02:28:24
Expiry: Never

  1. >”Squirt? You okay in there?”
  2. >Your name is Scootaloo
  3. >And you are WAY too high
  4. “Uh, yeah! Doing great!”
  5. >Woah
  6. >You swear words usually don’t sound like that
  7. >Or feel like that
  8. >“You sure, kiddo? You were out way later than… I was pretty worr- I mean, I wasn’t WORRIED worried, but…”
  9. >Buck, Scoots, focus!
  10. >You roll off your back (and break eye contact with the ceiling that’s definitely moving more than any cloud house should) to glance over at your bedside clock
  11. >Between the signed Spitfire cap you got last weekend and your [spoiler]pink diary[/spoiler] magenta journal, your fate sits in bright red magical numbering
  12. >[2 AM]
  13. >Aw mare, you said you’d be home hours ago
  14. >Between that and your super-lame “hey mom, what’s up, hope work was good, g’night!” on the way in the house, you're kinda boned
  15. >You’re high as clit and you gotta fess up
  16. >Face the music
  17. >”… So, what I guess I’m trying to say is, can I come in?”
  18. >Okay, you totally didn’t hear ANY of that
  19. >Quick, just say something!
  20. “Uh, sure! Sure, yeah.”
  21. >“… Okay then.”
  22. >Wait, did she say she was coming in?
  23. >You're in no state for this!
  24. >The door opens and Rainbow Dash trots in, still in her Wonderbolt formals
  25. >Black tie, lead pony medal, her office duds
  26. >Can’t wear the flight suit everywhere you guess, even though it’s literally the coolest thing ever
  27. >Heh, if you’d seen her wearing that back when you were a kid you woulda creamed
  28. >N-not that you’re a filly fooler or anything!
  29. >”Hey kiddo, I, ah…”
  30. >Oh thank the sisters she’s talking now
  31. >She sits down on your bed, just next to you
  32. >Not like usual though, she’s a little further away
  33. >A forehoof hovers over your leg, as if to give it a pat
  34. >It moves away
  35. >Okay, something’s wrong
  36. >You’re way too high but something is wrong
  37. >She’s looking at you like…
  38. >Oh no
  39. >Is she disappointed?
  40. >She’s totally disappointed.
  41. >Why would she be disappointed?
  42. >Is it because you’re late and high and OH BUCK SHE TOTALLY KNOWS YOU'RE HIGH
  43. >She knows!
  44. >She knows how stoned you are and she -
  45. >”-that okay?”
  46. >What
  47. >What did she just say
  48. >Has she been talking this whole time
  49. >You stare, not knowing if another blind “Uh, mmm hmm!” will spell your doom
  50. >”Awesome! I’ll be right back.”
  51. >She trots out of the room, pop definitely in her trot
  52. >Maybe you just imagined it, but you think you can detect a relieved huff down the hall
  53. >Okay, let’s think
  54. >She’s getting something and seems kind of happy now but you have to just stay cool
  55. >She CAN’T know for sure
  56. >Wait, didn’t you say you had to fess up?
  57. >Augh, this is so confusing!
  58. >It’s hard to think straight like this
  59. >Breathe
  60. >…
  61. >Okay, no, apologizing upfront sounds good
  62. >Let’s retrace our trots here Scoots
  63. >Figure out exactly how to frame it so it doesn’t sound like it’s your fault you’re such a buckup
  64. >Yeah, that’s right! Trick her into thinking you’re actually a good pony!
  65. >Applebloom would hate to hear you talking like that, but sometimes ya gotta cut the wheat to beat the heat
  66. >Heh heh heh, that’s pretty funny actually
  67. >Cut the hay to beat the -
  68. >”HEY SCOOTALOO! I’M HAVING TROUBLE FINDING IT, JUST GIMME A MINUTE!”
  69. >Rainbow’s booming “living room voice” tethers you back to reality
  70. >Found it?
  71. >What’s she finding?
  72. >Is it something to -
  73. >No, she’d never do that
  74. >… Right?
  75. >…
  76. >Crud, okay, focus
  77. >Retrace your trots
  78. >So… What happened again?
  79. >Okay okay okay, let’s start from the top
  80. >You finished the concert
  81. >No cutie mark, but you already got it like two years ago on your scooter so you weren’t expecting anything
  82. >Just having fun with your friends
  83. >Drumming’s fun enough anyway
  84. >If you were good at it that is
  85. >Buck, you’re about as good at drumming as anything else
  86. >Meaning, you’re bad
  87. >Real, real bad
  88. >Nonono stop, bad thought
  89. >See? Bad at THINKING
  90. >No
  91. >Breathe, focus
  92. >You root around in your bedsheets before finding your stuffed Rainbow Dash the Wonderbolt™
  93. >She always helps to calm you down
  94. >When you’re not really really worried about making sure she still likes you, that is
  95. >Which is… most of the time
  96. >…
  97. >Okay, what happened next?
  98. >Afterwards, you all decided to head back to Sweetie’s and celebrate
  99. >Rarity was out of town so no “adult supervision”
  100. >Maybe that’s it?
  101. >Rarity was gone, so of course you couldn’t be trusted to stay sober!
  102. >Nah, that’s a terrible excuse
  103. >You’re old enough to know better
  104. >Dash’d see right through you
  105. >She’d know that you’re a fraud AND a liar
  106. >Okay, moving on
  107. >You were all hanging out
  108. >You, Sweetie, AB, Rum-
  109. >“YO SCOOTS! IT MIGHT BE A WHILE, I CAN’T FIND THIS THING!”
  110. >More time, that’s good
  111. “UH, THAT’S FINE!”
  112. >Wow, that sounded almost normal
  113. >Maybe you’re coming down?
  114. >You wave your hoof in front of your face
  115. >Come to think of it, your hoof is looking pretty nice right now
  116. >All orange and stuff
  117. >… Alright, still pretty high
  118. >What were you saying?
  119. >Oh yeah, Sweetie’s place
  120. >You sit up and put stuffed Rainbow Dash down on your journal to stand guard
  121. >Who brought the brownies?
  122. >It was one of the colts, right? Was it Featherweight?
  123. >No, it was definitely Rumble, you remember he said he got them from his brother
  124. >So, the six of you were just hanging out and Rumble brought it up
  125. >Maybe you could say he forced you to eat them!
  126. >Nah, you can’t blame him, he’s too sweet for that
  127. >Besides, if Dash thought you were trying to throw one of your friends under the bus, what would she think of you?
  128. >You know what she’d think?
  129. >She’d think “Wow, what a terrible pony.”
  130. >And the thing is
  131. >She’d be right
  132. >”AH, FOUND IT!”
  133. >AUGH BUCKBUCKBUCK
  134. >You’re okay, you’re okaaaaay
  135. >You pull your head under the blanket and groan
  136. >Look, what else can you say
  137. >Peer pressure?
  138. >If that were true then Dinky would’ve eaten some too
  139. >You hear a clop at the bottom of the hardcloud stairs
  140. >You didn’t know what was in them?
  141. >Rumble’s too honest for that!
  142. >The hoofsteps have made it to the back of the hallway
  143. >Maybe he didn’t know either!
  144. >Clop
  145. >Yeah! None of us did!
  146. >Clop
  147. >No! She’ll know!
  148. >Clop
  149. >You don’t know how but she’ll know!
  150. >Clop
  151. >Face it Scootaloo
  152. >Clop
  153. >You’re terrible
  154. >Clop
  155. >Garbage
  156. >Clop
  157. >A pathetic loser waste of space who’d rather weasel her way out of taking responsibility than mare up and admit to herself how much she doesn’t deserve to live
  158. >Clop
  159. >Whatever Rainbow’s about to do
  160. >Clop
  161. >You deserve it
  162. >Clop
  163. >You deserve it
  164. >Clop
  165. >You-
  166. >“Hey, sorry that took so long! I left it by the front door after work but then I thought you were sleeping over somewhere so I put it in my desk.”
  167. >…
  168. >What?
  169. >That tone was not what you were expecting
  170. >It sounded... Grateful?
  171. >”Hey, are you okay in there? Heh, you pretending to be Tank or something?”
  172. >Tentatively, you bring your head up out of the blanket
  173. >The first thing you notice are Rainbow’s eyes
  174. >Her eyes you had expected even less
  175. >They’re full of warmth, concern
  176. >Next you look lower down on her face and spot what she’s holding in her mouth
  177. >It’s a card
  178. >It sports big bubble letters that get thinner at the right side of the paper, as if the author didn't plan out their spacing:
  179. >[I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to your concert…]
  180. >Rainbow slowly clops over to your bedside and spits out the card
  181. >For some reason, seeing her stand there so genuinely concerned for you hurts a little, even though you can’t tell why
  182. >”Well? You gonna read it?”
  183. >With a trembling hoof and upset stomach (partly from the drugs, but also something else you can’t quite identify) you pick up the card and gingerly open it
  184. >On the left side you spot, in the same bubble font:
  185. >[… But I know that you ROCKED! <3]
  186. >Below the heart is a purple-maned stickpony next to what appears to be a drumkit
  187. >There’s a note on the right side
  188. >You feel a tightness rise up in your chest
  189. >Oh Goddesses
  190. >[Hey Squirt! So I know I said last night that I couldn’t come to your big concert, and it seemed like that bummed you out a bit, so I wanted to do something nice. I’m not so great at the whole “apologizing” thing (and maybe not the whole “mom/sister” thing either…) but I’ve been realizing lately how much you kinda deserve to hear it from me, so I'm sorry. I know we just went last weekend but I promise to take you backstage next show, maybe we could hang out with Fleetfoot again?]
  191. >[Also, I know we both hate the mushy stuff but I]
  192. >Something’s scratched out
  193. >[Anyway, yeah, I’m writing this at work because I’m assuming you’ll be home by the time High Winds and I are out of the office. Just wanted to say you’re really the most awesome filly I know -RD :)]
  194. >[P.S. You’re not a filly, sorry for calling you one. You’ll always be “squirt” to me, but you’re totally a mare haha]
  195. >You look up at her
  196. >She’s sitting back next to you, her hoof over your leg in an affectionate gesture
  197. >You want to tell her how it’s totally okay that she couldn’t make it
  198. >How you totally are a filly
  199. >How you know that she loves you even if she couldn’t write it
  200. >But none of those are what you say
  201. “Rainbow Dash?”
  202. >”Yeah, Scootaloo?”
  203. “… I... REALLY wanna die.”
  204. >She just stares at you, mouth slightly ajar
  205. >”… What? What do you-“
  206. ”I want to die. I hate myself. I want to-“
  207. >”Oh my Goddesses, squirt, I-"
  208. “I want to die! I don’t deserve to bucking live I HATE MYSELF I-“
  209. >Rainbow pulls you into a hug, the tightest of your life, and your wetted face feels like it’s exploding
  210. “I WANT TO DIE! I’m so bucking pathetic I don’t deserve you to like me and I’m such a BUCKUP piece of shit but I d-don’t know why I feel this way and I wanted to apologize because I’m so- so bucking high and like they were brownies and- and Rumble gave- but Rarity wasn’t- or- or but but but I c-couldn’t think of a way to say it without you being m-mad at me an an and I really want you to like me b-but I’m a bad pony and it’s all my f-f-fault and I d-don’t deserve you liking me and I’m- I’m- I’m- I'm sohorryyyyyy…”
  211. >Your screams move slowly into unintelligible gurgles against your idol’s shoulder as she cradles you back and forth, shushing you while petting your mane
  212. >In a moment of unexpected clarity between feeble moans and gasps for air, you note that Rainbow would make a great mother
  213. >It takes a moment, but you finally get the hang of containing yourself
  214. >You’ve moved down to only the occasional sniffle as she continues to brush down the back of your head
  215. >Gosh this is embarrassing, you totally got snot and stuff all over her coat
  216. >It feels… nice to be hugged, though
  217. “I’m, uh… I’m okay, I, uh…”
  218. >You snort up a loose strand of snot and Rainbow giggles
  219. >”Feels good to let it out, right?”
  220. “Mmm hmm…”
  221. >You stay there for what feels like hours
  222. >”… Okay, a couple things.”
  223. >She breaks the embrace and looks you in the eyes
  224. >“Number one, and this is the most important…”
  225. >She ruffles your mane
  226. >”I love you, ya dingus.”
  227. >You stare
  228. >“You said you don’t deserve it, but you do. You ALWAYS deserve to have friends, and you ALWAYS deserve to have me. You could kill somepony and I’d be right there in your corner at the trial, so don’t you EVER say I don’t love you like a sister.”
  229. >You want to smile, but you can’t help but grimace as that feeling in your chest comes back
  230. “I… I know what you’re saying is true, I KNOW it’s true in my head, but… it’s just so hard to believe.”
  231. >”I get the feeling I don’t say it enough. I ALSO get the feeling that you need somepony to talk to who’s actually trained in this sorta stuff, so number two, we’re getting you a psychiatrist.”
  232. >A psychiatrist?
  233. ”… You think I'm a pony that needs one of those?”
  234. >”Hey maybe you do, maybe you don’t, but… Alright squirt, I haven’t told many ponies this so keep it on the down low, but when I was in college I was really sad. Like, really REALLY sad. So, my parents said I should talk to someone about it, and for a while I met with a therapist every other week.”
  235. >This is blowing your mind?
  236. >Rainbow Dash?
  237. >In therapy?
  238. >”Number three.”
  239. >She pokes you in the chest with her hoof, looking you dead in the eye with an intensity you were shocked even SHE had
  240. >”You HAVE to tell me or somepony you trust when you’re feeling like this. I know it’s hard, my ego's even bigger than yours, but nopony help you if you don't tell them you're hurting. Even if I've got the entire team watching my back during a maneuver, it's not my job to act the hero. It's my job to say "Hey, my wing's about to lock up." Can you promise me that? If I promise to have your back, you'll tell me if you don't think you can get through a stunt on your own?”
  241. >She crosses her hoof in front of her chest before placing it over her eye
  242. >You do the same and Rainbow gives a huge grin that even after everything you can't help but mirror
  243. >”… Well, thank gosh then.”
  244. >She wraps you in another hug just before you get a glance of her mischievous smirk
  245. >”… You know… I could’ve just gotten you high if you’d asked.”
  246. “Wait, what?”
  247. >”Yeah! Nothin' wrong with it every once in a while. Heck, me and Anon are getting crossed next weekend. Hey, if you want, you should come with. We could show you how to get messed up without getting ‘Messed Up,’ you know?”
  248. >…
  249. >…
  250. >Oh you have GOT to be kidding

Scootaloo is Too High [RGRE, /pj250/]

by Diligence