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Counting with Bump (By Anon)
By afterpasteCreated: 2021-07-16 21:31:33
Updated: 2021-10-05 17:38:57
Expiry: Never
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>”One!”
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>”Whaaaaaa-nah!”
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>”Two!”
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>”Tooooooooohh-“
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>You stop playing Dying light, to the sound of counting coming from your kitchen.
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“Cricket....”
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>You get up to go investigate.
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>You head for the source of the counting, and find it’s coming from Cricket, Thun, and your newest “G5” Pony bootleg “Bump”.
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“What’s going on here?”
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>Cricket looks at you, her wings glittering like a kid who got caught stealing cookies.
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>Thun as usual is staring at her favorite picture of the “pwetty thun “.
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>”W-we’re just playing monopoly! I was helping Bump count her cash since I landed on her space!”
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“Is that so...?”
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>Bump grins.
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>”I count to ten! Whaaaaaa-nah! Tuh-oooooooooh!
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Thre->>36698480!”
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>”No! No! No! That’s not right!”
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>Upon further inspection, despite Bump’s difficulties with counting, Cricket is actually cheating.”
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>You cock an eyebrow at her.
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>”U-uhhh...”
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“Cricket...”
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>”W-well-“
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“Stop cheating or no “Shickkun Nuggies”.”
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>”No! Not the nuggies! I hate them!”
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>”No! You’re speaking nonsense! That’s what it means!”
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>”No! It’s for tell time! ”
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>You stop looking up ways to raid /R9k/ with G5 pony memes to a heated argument taking place in the living room.
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>With a sigh, you get up from your seat to investigate.
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>Cricket, and Bump are facing off, practically touching snoots.
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“What are you two doing out here?”
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>Cricket buzzes angrily.
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>”Bump is being stupid! Everything she says makes no sense! It’s a load of COCK!”
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>You double-take at her potty mouth, but before you can respond, Bump chimes in.
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>”She wrong! She want to know time so I say look at COCK!”
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“CRICKET! BUMP! What’re you saying??”
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>The black bootleg changeling queen points an accusing hoof at bump.
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>”Tell her she’s wrong! When you say something nonsensical it’s a COCK. A big ol dumb Cock!”
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“Uh-“
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>”No! It is for the time telling! You look at the cock! You no see time? Put your face against the cock!”
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>They wrestle, while you pinch the bridge of your nose.
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“You’re both wrong. Also you’re saying something really naughty.”
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>Both look at you with shocked eyes.
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“Where did you even learn this word from-you haven’t been browsing that mandarin cow sweater knitting forum again, have you?”
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>Both girls start to sweat beads of guilt.
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“Bump...Cricket....!”
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>”It was Thun! She told us!”
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>”Yes! Yes! She all about cock! Cock this, and cock that!”
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>You look at Thun, who’s focusing on coloring a picture of the sun.
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>You look back at the two with an unconvinced curled lip.
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“....How many times do I have to teach you this lesson-PRINCESS THUN?!?”
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>”Th-Thun?”
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