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Counting with Bump (By Anon)

By afterpaste
Created: 2021-07-16 21:31:33
Updated: 2021-10-05 17:38:57
Expiry: Never
slice of lifecute/bootleg/kinderthuncricket

  1. 1.
    >”One!”
  2. 2.
    >”Whaaaaaa-nah!”
  3. 3.
    >”Two!”
  4. 4.
    >”Tooooooooohh-“
  5. 5.
    >You stop playing Dying light, to the sound of counting coming from your kitchen.
  6. 6.
    “Cricket....”
  7. 7.
    >You get up to go investigate.
  8. 8.
    >You head for the source of the counting, and find it’s coming from Cricket, Thun, and your newest “G5” Pony bootleg “Bump”.
  9. 9.
    “What’s going on here?”
  10. 10.
    >Cricket looks at you, her wings glittering like a kid who got caught stealing cookies.
  11. 11.
    >Thun as usual is staring at her favorite picture of the “pwetty thun “.
  12. 12.
    >”W-we’re just playing monopoly! I was helping Bump count her cash since I landed on her space!”
  13. 13.
    “Is that so...?”
  14. 14.
    >Bump grins.
  15. 15.
    >”I count to ten! Whaaaaaa-nah! Tuh-oooooooooh!
  16. 16.
    Thre->>36698480!”
  17. 17.
    >”No! No! No! That’s not right!”
  18. 18.
    >Upon further inspection, despite Bump’s difficulties with counting, Cricket is actually cheating.”
  19. 19.
    >You cock an eyebrow at her.
  20. 20.
    >”U-uhhh...”
  21. 21.
    “Cricket...”
  22. 22.
    >”W-well-“
  23. 23.
    “Stop cheating or no “Shickkun Nuggies”.”
  24. 24.
    >”No! Not the nuggies! I hate them!”
  25. 25.
     
  26. 26.
    >”No! You’re speaking nonsense! That’s what it means!”
  27. 27.
    >”No! It’s for tell time! ”
  28. 28.
    >You stop looking up ways to raid /R9k/ with G5 pony memes to a heated argument taking place in the living room.
  29. 29.
    >With a sigh, you get up from your seat to investigate.
  30. 30.
    >Cricket, and Bump are facing off, practically touching snoots.
  31. 31.
    “What are you two doing out here?”
  32. 32.
    >Cricket buzzes angrily.
  33. 33.
    >”Bump is being stupid! Everything she says makes no sense! It’s a load of COCK!”
  34. 34.
    >You double-take at her potty mouth, but before you can respond, Bump chimes in.
  35. 35.
    >”She wrong! She want to know time so I say look at COCK!”
  36. 36.
    “CRICKET! BUMP! What’re you saying??”
  37. 37.
    >The black bootleg changeling queen points an accusing hoof at bump.
  38. 38.
    >”Tell her she’s wrong! When you say something nonsensical it’s a COCK. A big ol dumb Cock!”
  39. 39.
    “Uh-“
  40. 40.
    >”No! It is for the time telling! You look at the cock! You no see time? Put your face against the cock!”
  41. 41.
    >They wrestle, while you pinch the bridge of your nose.
  42. 42.
    “You’re both wrong. Also you’re saying something really naughty.”
  43. 43.
    >Both look at you with shocked eyes.
  44. 44.
    “Where did you even learn this word from-you haven’t been browsing that mandarin cow sweater knitting forum again, have you?”
  45. 45.
    >Both girls start to sweat beads of guilt.
  46. 46.
    “Bump...Cricket....!”
  47. 47.
    >”It was Thun! She told us!”
  48. 48.
    >”Yes! Yes! She all about cock! Cock this, and cock that!”
  49. 49.
    >You look at Thun, who’s focusing on coloring a picture of the sun.
  50. 50.
    >You look back at the two with an unconvinced curled lip.
  51. 51.
    “....How many times do I have to teach you this lesson-PRINCESS THUN?!?”
  52. 52.
    >”Th-Thun?”

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