Coffeeholic(2016): Adventures of Anontonio: Day 1a [discont.]


                                            >Day wake me up in Lala land

                                            >be Anontonio the pastel colored winged horse abomination plush thing

                                            >you begin to come to

                                            >hopefully you've woken up from that nightmare

                                            >you feel something akin to a rapidly repeating patting on your chest

                                            >you force open your eyelids

                                            >you can still see your muzzle and find yourself in a bed with a light blue blanket inside what seems to be a wooden pastel colored cottage

                                            >...

                                            >cazzo

                                            >oh, and did you mention that you notice that there seems to be a bobble-head white bunny plush thing sternly stomping on your poofy chest?

                                            >yep, you're now certain

                                            >you've clearly fallen down the rabbit hole this delivery

                                            >you watch the little white bobble bunny turn around and point with one of its stubbly little arms towards its rump

                                            >you notice what looks like tire marks among unkept fur

                                            >you watch as it turns back to face you and points back towards your face as it continues stomping angrily over you

                                            >what does this roadkill want from you, a goddamn carrot?

                                            >you ignore the furball and raise your upper body up right from a laid down position once more

                                            >you take another look around the room

                                            >you see a few windows, stairs leading up, some couches, a fireplace, birdcages hanging from the ceiling, what seems to be other pet accessories, a door leading outside, another probably leading to a kitchen, a nightstand with an oddly familiar looking lamp and the vespa from before parked right next to the bed you were laying in minus the pizza boxes

                                            >you feel something suddenly pulling your chest forward

                                            >you look down to see the rude little furball pulling onto your chest fur with one paw and shaking the other paw angrily towards you

                                            >all while rudely squeaking nonsensical noises at you

                                            >you raise your right fluffy log of an arm from above the covers and shove the furball off of your hairy chest tuft with a squeak and retort

                                            "Eyy bugs!"

                                            >you assume this little birichino understands english from your experiences with the first two plushies you've met since you've woken up to this hell

                                            "Why don you maek like-a ball an' bounca!"

                                            >you're suddenly interrupted with the distinct sounds of laughter

                                            >"Hah, oh hoh hoh hoh hoh!"

                                            >you pause, turn your head and try to find the source of this unexpected chuckling

                                            >"Oh hah, over here my little joker."

                                            >you suddenly watch the strangely shaped desk lamp transformed and grew into the snake-like being from before

                                            >you remain speechless as the towering being approaches the side of the bed

                                            >you watch as the puffball on the bedsheet now yips and shakes it's paw angrily towards ass-face while hopping up and down

                                            >you gasp unexpectantly as the bunny suddenly poofs into what seems to be a white rubber ball with it's face it's face etched on it before you

                                            >dumbfounded, you watch as it then gets flicked out the window with a squeak from a flick of the snake-being's talon

                                            >"Bounce like a ball, classic..."

                                            >you stare at the snake-being in confusion as it wipes a tear from one of its eyes with its lion's paw before turning to face you

                                            >"I think I may like you already."

                                            >the snaky being sits down on the Vespa, a pair of glasses on it's face, a notepad and quil in paw suddenly poof into existence and it stares expectantly at you

                                            >you calm your nerves a little and try to use your words before things could get any more awkward

                                            "I, whera am I."

                                            >It begins to scribble something on its notepad and continues eyeing you

                                            >"You're in Fluttershy's quaint little cottage, just outside the bland little town of Ponyville."

                                            >you don't recognize either of those names

                                            "An whera izza dat?"

                                            >"In the boring kingdom of Equestira part of the generic world of Equestria. "Lame" name, I know.. Wouldn't you agree that Discordia or Chaos-Land would sell as a better name?"

                                            >you ignore the latter bit of its speech

                                            >the word Equestria as a kingdom or nation doesn't ring a bell to you

                                            >you're now positive that you're no longer living la dolce vita in la bella nazione that is Italy

                                            >you begin to tense up again

                                            "H-how do ayy come herea!?"

                                            >"Oh, I was enjoying magnificent picnic with Fluttershy when the little white rodent was being peskey. Sooo, I borrowed Celestia's magic mirror in hopes that a steam engine would drive the RUDE raskal away."

                                            >magic mirror? You didn't understand any of this, are you supposed to be in some sort of Disney cartoon?

                                            >"Of course you came riding on this cushy scooter of yours instead and broke the mirror in dimensional crossing. Oh, but don't worry about that little one. I still commend you on getting the job done. You should of seen your faces! Oh hah!"

                                            >you watch it chuckle as it throws the notepad and quil into the air and leans closer towards you

                                            >for a moment's glance at the flying notebook you see a crudely drawn picture of the said snake-being wearing sandals that appear to have the head of the rabbit on one and of what seems to be a white unicorn with it's tongue sticking out on the other

                                            >"Don't tell Celestia though, I don't think she'd have trouble getting a new one but "I" have a reputation now to keep."

                                            >it whispers senseless ramblings close to one of your ears in a hushed tone

                                            >you instinctively put up your arms to touch your ears as the snake-being leans back for a moment to watch you inquisitively

                                            >you feel some thing similar to dog ears with your nubs you then feel greasy hair akin to a mane

                                            >madonna, you're convinced you're a cartoon marshmellow pegasus!

                                            >you turn your attention back to it

                                            "An who'ra you, some talking asino?"

                                            >"I, little colt, am Discord! Draconequus, spirit of chaos, master of mischief, king of fun and funny things! Perhaps you've heard of me?"

                                            >you watch Discord pose like a egomaniacal prince with poofed golden crown, cane and trophy with "#1 Chaos" etched into it

                                            >you get it, he's magic or something

                                            >you give a blank annoyed stare at this pazzo as a few seconds pass

                                            >"Humph, I expect a little praise at least. Interdimensional portal summoning of a metal object in motion with such a small mirror wasn't easy you know?"

                                            >you've come to the conclusion that Discord is somehow responsible for your current situation

                                            >in anger you do what's natural to you

                                            >you raise your voice

                                            "PAZZO, SEND ME HO-muphuh!!!"

                                            >"Zip it, wouldn't want to wake Fluttershy before I know a little more about you little one. She's had long night, making space for you here."

                                            >your muzzle suddenly feels uncomfortably scrunched shut as Discord booped it with his lion's paw and then makes a zipper like motion

                                            >"Oh, it didn't work?"

                                            >you notice a sudden hesitation in Discord's voice and use this moment to bite down hard on his lion paw

                                            >"Gwooo, oh you cute little cad."

                                            >at least your teeth weren't soft

                                            >you feel your jaw snap shut as Discord unhinged his paw in retreat from your teeth

                                            >you watch as Discord now poofed a new set of clothes onto himself in the style of a Dentist with a face mask, white coat and latex gloves

                                            >"You should of played along little one, now I have to figure out what you are the fun way."

                                            "Whadda you want wid-muepghhh."

                                            >you get cut off again as Discord leans close to your face and uses the gloves to forcibly keep open your mouth from the sides

                                            >you try to fight him off you kicking by using your four hooves but alas, your marshmallowy appendages were useless

                                            >you watch helplessly as you can only assume Discord is making funny faces with your lips as if you were putty or something

                                            >"Hmm, two pairs of canines.."

                                            >you whine in pain as Discord forces your mouth even more open then what you would consider possible with what you can only assume is a miniature car tire jack

                                            >you're not used to such cartoon physics

                                            >you watch in horror as Discord sticks his head into your mouth as if wanting to take a look down your throat

                                            "Uggrgh!"

                                            >you find fur taste disgusting and your eyes begin to tear up from discomfort

                                            >"Hmmmm, smells like garlic in here. So you're definitely not a vampony."

                                            >you gasp in relief as Discord leaves your gullet and you take a quick gasp of air only to feel dread again once you feel something pull your tail

                                            >si, you want off the ride now per piacere

                                            >you'd bet this Disney cartoon hell you're in is directed by Tim Burton

                                            >you're lifted up from your tail by Discord's talon claw and are now hanging upside down

                                            >you shake in fear as a little black storm cloud emitting static forms above you but still below the ceiling

                                            >"Just one more experiment now. This should only sting for a moment if you're a normal pony."

                                            >Mama mia, he is watching you expectantly with a devilish grin!

                                            >you've watched enough cartoons as a kid to know where this is going

                                            >you want to raise a white flag

                                            "Per f-favore non-n, ah-I surrendurra! I-I talk! I TALK!"

                                            >but your pleads go unheard as a small jolt of lightning cracks and hits you

                                            >you feel nothing from it, but for a moment you swear you could see the pastel colored skeleton of your horse body and you suddenly have a bit of a sharp headache

                                            >"Immune to metamorphoses but only resistant to magic, hmmm."

                                            >Discord then flips you around and holds you up as if you were Simba from lion king or something

                                            >"Well aren't you a very special little pegasus colt. That wasn't TOO bad now, was it?"

                                            >...

                                            >why did this merda always HAVE to happen to you

                                            >you hear footsteps, no hoof-steps running down the stairway

                                            "I-is everything alright!? I-I thought I heard yelling, then lightning, then I just-EPPP!"

                                            >both you and Discord turn your attention towards the source of that commotion

                                            >your soggy eyes see what you think is angel horse from before standing a few feet away from you and Discord

                                            >you watch the yellow cartoon pegasus with pink mane gasp, then puffs her cheeks before shouting a single phrase like an angry siren

                                            >"D-DISCORD!!"

                                            >you hear noting but eerie quiet for a few seconds

                                            >then you began to suddenly feel wet all over your lower body followed by a dripping sound

                                            >mi scappa la pipi, papa

                                            >"Oh! Myy..."

                                            >you were a half-sobbing, shaking, poofy mess of a little pegasus and now peed yourself aswell as on the cottage's wood pastel colored floor

                                            >you've done this all while still being held up by Discord

                                            >"Now Fluttershy, look what you've done to the poor colt! I had him COMPLETELY under control. Now you've gone and made him pee himself by terrifying him."

                                            >you can't wake up inside