Coffeeholic(2016): Adventures of Anontonio: Day 1b [discont.]


                                            >...

                                            >still be Anontonio the tiny marshmallow pegasus plush

                                            >be currently taking a bath in what you assume to be a large sink in the cottage's kitchen

                                            >Angel hors-uh, you think Flutter-something was her name.

                                            >anyways, Flutter-butter or whatever her name is currently rinsing and scrubbing you of what you assume to be the urine from your fur

                                            >you look down towards what you assume is water in this cartoon Equestrian hell scale you've found yourself in

                                            >it looks opaque to you with a very light bluish tint

                                            >you see yourself in the reflection, you have similar large button eyes and facial structure to Butterfly-horse

                                            >you acknowledge your current body as the same species as her

                                            >you lower your horse head half way under the "waterline"

                                            >this liquid may look like paint but it most definitely is as tasteless and flowing as water

                                            >you still don't think you'd trust boiling pasta in it though

                                            >not that you have the hands to cook now anyways

                                            >Flutter-horse seems to be able to grasp a brush with her hoof-nub appendages easily as she scrubs you

                                            >you just let it happen, you have no will to resist after the events you've experienced today

                                            >Fluttershed seemed to be apologetically mumbling incomprehensible babbling towards you in a panic

                                            >"OhhpleasepleasePLEASEforgivemelittlecoltIdidn'tmeantoscareyousoohhCelestiawhat'veIgottenmyselfintothispoorcoltwhatwouldTwilightdoohhblahblahblahblahblah..."

                                            >you've never heard panicked shoutings this quiet your whole life

                                            >you weren't really trying to pay attention

                                            >at least you didn't smell like piss anymore

                                            >Flutterbuns begins to calm around you and let's the water drain

                                            >"Ohh, Fluttershy, I've returned squeaky clean, just like your living room floor."

                                            >you watch as Discord walks into the room towards you, wearing a bathing cap and towel wrapped around him

                                            >your eyes go wide for a moment then relaxed into a thousand yard state, he has returned

                                            >you were shivering, but it wasn't because of Dickcord

                                            >you believed that you've already suffered everything this cartoon fantasy world could dish out on you and you've barely been here a day

                                            >you sneeze

                                            >"Ohh, he's shivering." Fluttershy looks toward Discord, then back to you and then trots up to him. "Discord, let me borrow this!" Fluttershy yanks the towel off Discord with her mouth, sending him spinning back for a twirl or two and then begins to dry you with it

                                            >you're not sure how you feel about this

                                            >"There, feeling better?"

                                            >your focus returns towards the maternal acting horse before you asking you a question

                                            "Non!"

                                            >you retort bluntly

                                            >suddenly what you assume to be your stomach started garbling

                                            Discord suddenly cuts in front of Fluttershy and picks you up

                                            >"See Flutters, he's just hungry. Why don't you prepare something for him to eat while I quickly take him to see a Doctor."

                                            >you were about to protest but suddenly a giant lollypop magically materialized in your mouth, halting you from trying

                                            >"Oh, I don't know Discord, the last time I saw him with you. He looked so frazzled an-"

                                            >Discord now holds you in one arm and boops Fluttershy's mizzle with the other

                                            >"Up-pup up, Flutters let's not forget who scared this colt to the point he soiled himself. I told you, I was just checking him for outside injuries, he fell pretty far off that silly scooter remember. Of course he'd be in a panic."

                                            >Fluttershy scrunched up her muzzle and meekly gave you a guilty look for a moment, reconsidering Discords offer while you where still preoccupied with struggling to find a way to remove the oversized lollypop stuck in your mouth.

                                            >"Well, I guess if it's to see a Doctor then it's o-"

                                            >"Alright Fluttershy, I'll have him back by dinner!"

                                            >Discord snaps his fingers, and both you and Fluttshy blink expectantly as nothing happens.

                                            >You hear Discord mutter somethings long the lines of "Oh yea, forgot about that." under his breath as if annoyed.

                                            >He snaps his fingers again and this time a portal appears, he then walks into it with you in arm

                                            >the portal disappears behind you, Dsicord gently lets you down on the grass and the lollypop in you mouth simply ceased to exist

                                            >you see a variety of floating land masses before you in a sea of purple shaded space

                                            "Dis iz not hospital."

                                            >you turn your head around to face to see what seems to be Discord standing in front of a red brick house, pondering about something

                                            >you speak up to try to get his attention

                                            "I zought you ver bringing me-a to da hospital! Ver are-a we dastardo!"

                                            >"Oh, we're still going to see a Doctor little one. We're just taking a detour first, this is my pleasant little homestead away from everything. My quaint little pocket dimension where I hold domain over away from Equestria, you see."

                                            >you price together his words and come to the realization that Dickcord can open portals to other dimensions at will

                                            >that's probably how you got here

                                            >THAT'S ALSO HOW YOU CAN GET BACK HOME!

                                            >your eyes go wide for a moment and then you begin to shout

                                            "NEVERMIND ZAT, SEND ME BACK WHERA YOU FIND ME, TO MY DIMENSION! TO MY-A WORLD, TO TERRA! TO MY HOMELAND, ITALIA!"

                                            >you repeatedly slam your forehooves against the lawn in tantrum as you let your frustred desperate plea be heard

                                            >you semi-tearfully observe Discord waiting for a response, as he begins to rub his chin with a paw and puts on a half annoyed face

                                            "You know little colt, in most of the dimensions I've traveled to, it's common courtesy to introduce yourself and call all-powerful draqonequus deitys by their name or title before pleading for a favor."

                                            >your heart skipped a beat for a moment and you immediately respond, not wanting to disrespect the pupazzo that can free you from this nightmare

                                            >despite him being the cause that you're in this mess in the first place, you think

                                            "My nam iz Anone, I-I mean-a Anontonio. Anontonio d'Italia! I'm just a pizza delivery boy! Per favore signore Discord, non more-a dis! I just want to go home!"

                                            >Discord shows what you think is a guilty face towards you for a moment from the pondering, as if he's trying to come up with a proper response.

                                            >you scramble to your fee-hooves trying stand on your four legs, you lose your balance and your instinctively flutter for a moment as you fall on your front.

                                            >Oooph, you try to imagine how a small four legged marshmallow horse would crawl

                                            >you bring your rear legs and heave one by one dragging across the lawn towards Discord

                                            >once close enough, you arch on to his Trogdor like lizard leg and hold onto it for support.

                                            "Please signore Discord!"

                                            >you say once more with bright watery eyes looking up towards Discord with hope

                                            >Daicords eyes you guiltily in silence, almost tearing up himself as if he's never seen a more pathetic, adorable and sad little thing as you

                                            >"I'm sorry Anontonio."

                                            >what

                                            "What? Waddya mean-a, you'ra sorry?!"

                                            >you hold on to his leg tighter and raise your voice waiting for an explanation

                                            >Discord poofs an hankerchief in his talon and whipes his near teary eyes with it before clearing his voice and turning his head to the side, as trying to avoid eye contact with you

                                            >"Of the countless dimensions I've visited, I'm not familiar with such a world. It's unlikely that you'll ever be able to find a way to return to your homeland in your lifetime."

                                            >your heart skips a beat, a dreadful sensation of light headedness falls over you, your pupils shrink and you weekly let go of Discord's reptilian leg as your remaining desperate hope to return home have been crushed

                                            >your life up untill now flashes in your thoughts

                                            >according to this all mighty pazzo you will never deliver pizzas in your hometown again, you will never grasp a fork and knife in your dexterous hands or cook with them again, you will never kick a ball with a ball, play calcio or watch the World Cup with your buddies at a bar again, you will never drive on the old cramped stone paved streets or hills or pass by your nations proud landmarks ever again, you will never see your friends, your family, you're Mama's cooking, caring face or loud scolding tone with you, and you will never EVER get that tip

                                            >cazzo

                                            >it was as if a doctor diagnosed you waste a terminal disease or something

                                            >except said diagnosis instead is being trapped inside the body of a little marshmallow pegasus inside pastel-colored magical fantasy land of cartoon physics and talking animal pupazzos

                                            >you stare at the ground, defeated and dazed in depression

                                            >you hear Discord snapping his fingers and suddenly find yourself elevated upon what seems to be a stool made from peppermint

                                            >you where too lost in pessimism to be phased by it

                                            >you didn't care

                                            >you didn't know what to do with yourself

                                            >Discord extends his paw under your chin and raises it so you could meet his reassuring smile

                                            >"It's not ALL bad, Anontonio."

                                            >porco diavolo, is he seriously trying to to cheer you up?

                                            >he's the reason you're in this merda!

                                            >you watch Discord poofs a little wooden televisor box with a crank into existence within his grasp

                                            >"Look on the bright side, you've still got your new life ahead of you."

                                            >he begins cranking it with one arm and it lights up, showing you a slideshow of crude drawings

                                            >one thing that stood out to you was the derpy little green marshmallow pegasus that you think was supposed to represent you in the middle of each of the sliding picture frame's animation

                                            >"After all you're still a foal, you've still got your whole life ahead of you little colt."

                                            >the moving picture frames shows you falling out of a portal and meeting the ground with a thud while wearing a pacifier and bib

                                            >you feel insulted and clarify a response

                                            "Ayy'm an adul--!?"

                                            >a pacifier materialized in your mouth, shutting you up mid speech

                                            >"Nuh, uh uh. Little Anon, it's rude to talk during the show. Please pay attention."

                                            >you spit out the pacifier and give Discord a deathly annoyed stare before looking back towards the motion picture

                                            >the little green pegasus in the animation is now in front of a poorly drawn home with two larger horses hugging him and then is welcomed inside

                                            >"You'll be adopted by a loving foster family, and receive plenty of plenty of hugs and affection."

                                            >the pegasus is tucked into bed and kissed goodnight by a maternal like larger mommy pony

                                            >"You'll go to school, learn about Equestria, make "friends" and get into all sorts of chaos."

                                            >the open window from the pegasus's little drawn room revealed a moon that was quickly replaced by a crudely drawn sun with a little smiley face on it.

                                            >the Pegasus praises the sun as he wakes

                                            >the pegasus rushes out of his bed and picks up a backpack. He then passes by the kitchen on the way out of the house, spilling a glass filled with a chocolate colored liquid and grabbing what seems to be a piece toast with his mouth before exiting.

                                            >once outside the pegasus soars into the sky towards what seems to be a 1930s schoolhouse and meeting with other small horses. Together they all beat a crudely drawn dead white bunny with sticks.

                                            >"And one day, you'll fall in love with a mare, get married and sign your little pony soul to living with chaos at every waking moment!"

                                            >one of a little fillies kiss the pegasus and they both grow in size as the image morphs to what seems to be a crudely drawn wedding ceremony.

                                            >the newlyweds walk down the row and exit only to find themselves old on a porch with miserable faces and little foals circling them.

                                            >Discord sighs in admiration and then turns to face you as the slideshow ends and the televisor poofs out of existence

                                            >"Well, doesn't that sound delightful Anon, what do you think?"

                                            >what you think?

                                            >WHAT YOU THINK!?

                                            >Assface is asking what YOU think of being forced to relive your life as a little talking horse in Alice's Wonderland as an orphan because of HIS careless shenanigans

                                            >your sadness fades, all you feel is rage and a lack of empathy towards this clown playing with the strings of your fate like a pupazzo

                                            >you're no Pinocchio however, you've lost all fucks to give

                                            >in your rage, you do what's natural to you once more

                                            >you raise your voice

                                            "AYY-A ZINK YOU SHOULDDA LEARN TO DRAW BETTA! VATENE A CAGARE AL INFERNO, TESTA DI ASINO CORNUTO!"

                                            >your shouts echoed throughout the chaotic dimension, waves of sound visible to the naked eye. The windows of Discords home shattered, the very peppermint stool you were standing on collapsed and you along with it. Even Discord spammed back and fourth as he forced himself to cover his own ears.

                                            >you yourself still felt some ringing from your ears over your own rage filled shouts

                                            >you rub your head and ears with your march mellow hooves

                                            >you do not think you fully understand the secrets to your new pony like form yet

                                            >you look up to see a still recovering Discord

                                            >you give a shit eating grin as you felt pleased that you were able to cause some harm to that bastardo

                                            >"Well it seems I won't be able to teach you the basics of your body with that problem attitude problem of yours. I guess We'll to forward that hospital visit now."

                                            >Discord stops covering his ears and poofs what looks to be a golden cane with your pony self's head on it wearing a jesters hat

                                            >he's now looking down at you with a familiar devilish grin

                                            >your suddenly remembered that despite you not giving any fucks, that you were still in a fragile marshmallow horse's body that is very much capable of feeling pain

                                            >was he going to whack you with that?

                                            "You wouldn't hit a bambino, a-a colt wid zat would you?"

                                            >you try to give an innocent yet forced smile, as you desperately try shuffling backwards

                                            >"What's that Anontonio? I can't hear you, you see I decided to remove my ear drums temporarily while preparing you for the X-Ray machine. Now stand still, this has to look real convincing. This will only hurt for a moment, my reputation is at stake."

                                            >you cring

                                            >well, it was worth a shot

                                            >he was seriously intent to whack you with that thing

                                            "Non, fack off-a! Go away! NON MI ROMPERE LE PALLE!"

                                            >you yell, hoping another shockwave of sound would strike him

                                            >you had no such luck this time around

                                            *thwap*

                                            >you are currently in the air in a spin with a throbbing pain coming from the back of your head

                                            >you see yourself flying towards a tear of light as your vision goes black

                                            >hello darkness my old friend


                                            Skill unlocked: Raging Napoletano Voice


                                            If certain conditions are met, you have the ability to shout a powerful shockwave visible to the naked eye.