Coffeeholic(2016): Dadonequus AAA Justice Colts Action Trailer Parody


                                            WARNING SPOILERS OF SEVERAL DADONEQUUS STORIES AHEAD!!


                                            >dramatic trailer music plays

                                            >shows pastel colored multiverse with 3 pairs of King Sombra's eyes as an overlay

                                            >deep voiced trailer guy speaks

                                            >"when a villain is so unexpected stealthy he success in taking over the Equestrian multiverse in a third of a screentime it takes for a toy commercial"

                                            >"and when all the main protagonists are caught by surprise and captured"

                                            >pan to Celestia saying "You'll never get away with this Sombras!" then to a dramatic Rarity crying "Not the crystals!" And finally to a sad Derpy Hooves that accidentally busted out of a jail cell with her ass "I just don't know what went wrong?"

                                            >"their fate rests in the hooves of 3 outsiders"

                                            >"magically turned into little colts?!"

                                            >"one quantum physicist unicorn"

                                            >shows Elo's Dr. Anon standing to the left side of the screen on what seems to be the top of a hill over watching Sombra's mind slave army but hide the middle and right side

                                            Dr. Anon: "Don't worry fags, I know the odds are against us but with my superior brain and magic unicorn horn, I'll calculate a solution to this problem."

                                            >"A man-child in the body of an earth pony with a Deus-EX Machina villain's horn."

                                            >now both left and center part of screen are showing with Erf's Anon to the center

                                            Smug Erf's Anon to Elo's Dr. Anon while pointing to the Sobra horn on his head: "Mines bigger and has power equivalent to Disocrd."

                                            Elo's Dr. Anon retorts: "Do you have mare problems? Because it sounds like you're compensating for something."

                                            >"and..."

                                            >"one lazy trash talking Italian pegasus"

                                            >hill now shows all 3 protagonists with Coffee's Anontonio to the right side of the screen hovering as he angrily shakes his hoof at the other two

                                            "Shaddup cornuti! Or I-a shit on you both from up here-a!!!"

                                            >"will they succeed?"

                                            >"or will they fail resolve their differences and find the magic of friendship between them needed to stop this menace?"

                                            >switch to action scenes that probably take place for 6 minutes of the hour long movie and trailer music suddenly seems at most epic point

                                            >one of Erf's Anon shoryukening a villain after being fed up of being mericilessly rolled around like a ball

                                            >one of Coffee's Anontonio kicking down a door with a cigar in mouth and shooting dried penne from a tommygun towards a group of villains playing go fish in a tavern

                                            >one of Elo's Dr. Anon pressing a button on a controller and a literal rainboom nuke mushroom cloud explosion appears in the middle of the slave army's ranks

                                            "Now with 3 times the villain screen time"

                                            >switch to scene where several King sombra seems almost victorious and says "Crystals" or something

                                            >"featuring guest actor Anon Filly playing as multidimensional Femme Fatalle anti-hero"

                                            >switches to footage of Anon Filly staring down towards the 3 Anons seeming to power up angrily like in DBZ or something.

                                            Anon Filly: "HUURGHR, I USED TO HAVE A DICK TOOO!!!!"

                                            >"the hottest action movie in theatres this heartwarming season!"

                                            >epic trailer music stops and screen fades to black

                                            >"Triple A"

                                            >AAA shows on screen for a few moments along with date of theatre premier and then the scene switches back to the 3 Anons idly chatting to each other

                                            Coffee's Anontonio to the other two: "Sooo... You froci actually volunteered to get brought into another dimension and get turned into a small magical talking horse by Discord?!"

                                            Erf's Anon: "Actually, yes!"

                                            Elo's Dr. Anon: "It's complicated..."

                                            >fin


                                            General idea of the generic epic

                                            Trailer music: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ASj81daun5Q