Anon, I Need You To Fug My Sister


                                            >Be me, Anon.

                                            >Currently drinking a cold apple cider, while just staring out the window.

                                            >Not much else to do here in pastel pony land.

                                            >Alright, it's not so bad..

                                            >The views good at least...

                                            >......

                                            >..I also don't have to deal with Twilight's bullshit right now, and that's always a plus.

                                            >I've been here for like six months, and every damn day, I have to see this mare. True, she's letting me live with her, but that's besides the point.

                                            >She's fucking CRAZY. The bitch is absolutely unstable, and I seriously worry for her well being at times.

                                            >She's always telling me I can't leave the library unsupervised, and that I'll cause an incident or hurt somepony.

                                            >She's always watching me, too. She can't even leave me alone for five fucking minutes, even when I'm in the bathroom..

                                            >...

                                            >She's right behind me, isn't she?

                                            >"H-Hi Anon..!"

                                            >This bitch, I swear..

                                            "What is it, Twiggles? Wan't me to go to Hayburger with you again?"

                                            >"U-Uh.."

                                            *sigh* "What, ya want me to carry you or something?"

                                            >"YES, I-I mean NO! I want you to meet somepony today.. H-He's my brother.."

                                            >Oh no. There's two of them.

                                            "Uhm, you sure about this, Twi? I thought you said I couldn't be around other ponies due to how ugly I am, and that I'd probably offend them somehow?"

                                            >"...you're not ugly..."

                                            >Damnit, I hate it when she mumbles.

                                            "What?"

                                            >"I-I said it's true! You're really UGLY!

                                            "Well obviously, but that's besides the point right now. You really want me to meet your brother?"

                                            >"Y-Yes! You two could become good f-friends! But he also wanted to check up on m-me, so I don't really have a choice.."

                                            "Uh, okay I gue-"

                                            >"G-Great! He'll be here any minute now, so behave!"

                                            >She then practically sprinted away, slamming the door on her way out.

                                            >Well, that was a bit of a surprise.

                                            >..aaand my cider's warm. Perfect.

                                            >No point in staying up here anymore. I guess I'll go downstairs.


                                            >My walk down the stairs was rather uneventful, considering I'm now used to the sound of those shitty steps barely supporting my weight.

                                            >So, here I am now, sitting on this way-too-small couch. At least it's comfortable.

                                            >Better enjoy it while it lasts.

                                            *knock* *knock*

                                            >Oh God, here we fuckin' go..

                                            >"I-I'm coming! Just wait one moment!"

                                            >And here she comes, nearly falling on her fatass while trying to get the door.

                                            >It's honestly kind of cute.

                                            >"H-Hello, Shining! Welcome to my humble abode, haha!"

                                            >Man, she's really straining here.

                                            >"Hey, Twi. It's.. uh, nice to see you, too."

                                            >So that's what he looks like. Huh. I thought he'd be more purple.

                                            >"Y-Yeah, it's nice to see you again, too! Please, c-come in~..!"

                                            >Oh God what is she doing.

                                            >The poor guy looks so uncomfortable..

                                            >"Um, uh, okay sis.."

                                            >He then steps through the door, and heads right towards the front room. He's probably looking for the couch.

                                            >The one I'm currently sitting in..

                                            >Twilight trys to get in front of him, probably in an attempt to hide my existence, but it's too late.

                                            >He notices me almost immediately.

                                            >"So, I guess you're the monkey man that my sister summoned. I've heard very little of you, but I must say, you're taller than I expected. It's nice to finally meet you, Anon."

                                            >Wow, he's nothing like his sister.

                                            >And there's a lot to unpack here, but I'll just keep it simple I guess..

                                            "Hello, uh.. Shining. It's a pleasure to meet you as well. Honestly, I didn't even know you existed ten minutes ago. Oh, and please forgive me if I accidentally offend you in anyway shape or form. I've heard I'm not good with introductions, and that I'm quite ugly."

                                            >"..."

                                            >Damnit, now he's just standing there staring at me.

                                            >Well shit, I gave it a shot. What more does he fucking want from me?

                                            >I quickly shoot a glance towards Twilight, hoping to at least see her reaction to all this, but her face is currently covered completely by a large book.

                                            >Then, finally, the stallion speaks.

                                            >"Hey Twilight, I'm sure you don't mind if Anon and I talk alone for a little while, right?"

                                            >"W-Well actually I do mi-"

                                            >"Good. We'll only be a few minutes."

                                            >He starts walking upstairs, ushering me to follow him with the wave of his hoove. I don't really have much of a choice in the matter, so I follow him upstairs as well.

                                            >Now, did I say I hate these stairs? Well, I do.

                                            >Fucking unstable shits..

                                            >This little pony is making it look so damn easy.

                                            >It's infuriating, I tell you what.

                                            >Eventually we reach the top of the stairs, and I'm already dreading whatever this conversation might entail.

                                            >Shinings been very quit the past few minutes, and I'm starting to get a bit anxious.

                                            >After sitting in silence for a few more moments, Shining finally decides to speak.

                                            >He looks pissed.

                                            >"Alright Anon, no more damn games. You know why I'm here."

                                            >Huh?

                                            "Huh? What the fuck are you on about?"

                                            >He slams his hoove onto the floor, giving you his most intense glare.

                                            >"Don't you dare mess with me! You know what you need to do, you know why I'm here!"

                                            >Who the hell does this little pony think he is!?

                                            >And what the fuck does he mean by 'you know what you need to do'!?

                                            "What in the hell are you talking about, you little motherfucker!? I don't even know you!"

                                            >He holds the glare for a few seconds longer, but eventually his head falls downward, and he exhales loudly.

                                            >"I'm.. I'm sorry, Anon. I-I don't know what came over me.."

                                            >Oh God, he's just fucking like her.

                                            >I'm surrounded by bipolar ponies.

                                            >"I.. I thought you knew why.. ugh, it's just been so damn hard, and it's only gotten worse lately.."

                                            "What are you talking about..?"

                                            >"I.. I came here to ask something of you. And I NEED you to do it, understand? The fate of my family, no, my BLOODLINE is in your.. uh, whatever those are?"

                                            "Hands. They're called hands."

                                            >"O-Oh, right.. Well, like I was saying, I really need you to do this, Anon."

                                            "Okay, sure, whatever. Just say it already, Shining."

                                            >...

                                            >"Anon, I need you to fug my sister."