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Derpy eats 6 muffins

By Guest
Created: 2022-03-15 17:50:05
Expiry: Never

  1. The smell was heavenly, a decadent aroma flooding your kitchen, billowing out and covering the entirety of your home. Six perfectly made muffins. Oh no no, not just ANY muffins, your absolute favorite type; Cinnamon banana nut. Six idols of perfection, fresh from the oven for you and....five....you and six? Was it six for you and five friends? Were there six and you forgot to count yourself? How many did you make again....eyes criss crossed in a valiant (but losing) effort, tongue just barely peeking through your lips in concentration. "One, two, three...three....threeeeeeee." Your eyes went back to their resting points, once blurred, now the muffins disappeared into all but faint echoes at the corners of your vision. Your gut told you six muffins for you and five, unable to trust your vision you did the "wise" thing. You simply trusted your gut. Silly little forgetful mare, couldn't even count all of your friends haha. Your mother always swore your forgetfulness would make it hard to keep a stallion, she said you'd simply forget your relationship with him. Silly mom, you knew that your prince would one day sweep you off your hooves, muffin platter in tow. Come to think of it....was your boss forgetful as well? He sure seemed like it today, letting you off of work so early considering your shift was supposed to last all day, maybe it was a reward for your hard work? You hadn't meant to topple the stack of boxes over, he must have seen past such a mistake to see the hard worker you were beneath the accidents. He did mutter something about "being unable to fire the dolt," quietly as you gave him a hoof salute and marched out of the postal office. You didn't know what it meant but he must see through your accident prone nature. You should bring him a muffin sometime so he doesn't feel so alone, forgetful beings gotta stick together you suppose.
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  3. Your reward, the better part of a day...ON THE WEEKEND NO LESS? It was quite rare that you had the luxury of any part of the weekend to yourself. You...couldn't remember the last time you had any of one off. What better way to spend it than with your friends? First thing you had done was let them know of your good fortune and invite them over for muffins. Dinky was staying the weekend at Twist's house, making it a perfect time for all of you to catch up. The clock read 1 PM. Let's see....off at 10, home at 1030 and baking since...WOW. It only took a little over 2 hours for you to bake them. So much improvement since your last attempt, speeding up haha. Your offset eyes did make basic tasks quite difficult, but the progress speaks for itself. "Good job Derpy," you whispered enthusiastically. Results speaking for yourself as you arranged the bouquet of muffins on your table. A perfect set of edible idols. Fluffy and warm...intoxicating scent...you... NORMALLY, you would wait for them to show up but you were finding them just too tempting, they ARE your favorites after all...You doubt they'd mind if you ate yours already, more time for you to talk before their turns you supposed. Yep, it all checks out.
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  5. You ate it slowly, savoring the flavor of every bite. Indulging in the nuts and cinnamon, flawless as the combination was to your tastebuds. Pure, decadent delight. If your tastebuds could talk, you reckon they'd be singing right now. A chorus of pure delight having being thrown such perfection. Oh Celestia, they were even better than last time, a true testament to your growing skill. It was disheartening come the final bite, having to say goodbye to your share of the platter. How one would wish there to be one more bite. Swallowing the last portion you looked at the tray. Yep, five muffins five friends. The clock read 1:05. You waited.
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  7. The clock read 2PM. Idle thoughts distracted you....when was the last time any of them had visited? Had they ever? No no, Derpy. No bad thoughts, your mind wouldn't lie to you.
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  9. 2:30PM. Pinkie pie never wanted to try your muffins, bizarre as it seemed. She always turned away every offer, you swore the party mare liked sweets and cakes of any sort? Was there something wrong with your cooking? Hm. She probably wouldn't mind if you ate the one you had for her then, you doubted her willingness to try it now. It was...cold, but just every bit as delicious as the first. Mouth ignited once more in pleasure as you polished it off. Maybe one day you could convince her.
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  11. 2:45PM. Dash liked to avoid you. As she tried again today before you caught her, was she still mad about the weather incidents? Couldn't be it, surely she was like your boss, willing to see past your unfortunately clutzy nature. You had even offered to split your lunch (Muffins) with her as an apology. She had unfortunately denied, you presumed she didn't like muffins. Blitzing past, she had called you all manner of words you didn't understand. Such big words to say for friend, maybe she knew another language. You figured she wouldn't mind if you....you ate her muffin...it was tasteless.
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  13. 3:00PM. You remembered how Fluttershy never wanted you near her animals for too long. Something about being a...haz...erd, to her small animals? You weren't....quite sure what she meant? Ponies were around them all the time, why were you any different? You...ate...her muffin...It hurt was cold yet....it burned your mouth.
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  15. 3:05. Rarity was always quick to usher you out of her boutique. Claiming fearfulness of her property, all the sewing machines, fabrics and supplies. "Quite frankly darling I'd rather avoid a lawsuit if you were to fall here." You're not sure what she meant. The muffin was bitter.
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  17. 3:07. Applejack never could look you in the eyes (Which you were used to, few ponies tried anymore), but it felt...wrong coming form her now. You couldn't put your hoof to it, seeing her look away and scrunch her muzzle when she told you she would consider coming over. Something about it now....felt dirty. Painful. You didn't understand. The muffin was....salty, stained with a fluid dripping down your muzzle. Slow pained bites contrasted heavily to your initial enthusiasm. Salt, salt overpowered every flavor, filled with moisture as it was. Eyes unable to focus and align through your blurred vision, to locate the source of the dripping. Stinging with pain as they were. The fluid oozed freely from you, staining the wooden table with moisture. Only now were you painfully aware of how empty your home was, devoid of life other than you. No friends, no Dinky. Nopony here to comfort you...no friend here. No loving Stallionfriend, no family. Nothing. Head in your hooves flat to the table, your whimpering the only comfort left to you. Twilight...that mare. She who refused to look at you as she spoke, she who refused to let you borrow books from the library even SHE could NOT come, the princess of FRIENDSHIP. SH-Oh. The realization rammed you like that time Big Mac had accidentally ran into you at full gallop. Your eyes straightened and focused as you realized. Silly little mare, there were six muffins for seven ponies. Slapping yourself in realization, of COURSE they hadn't shown up, the six of them didn't want to fight over a muffin or have to deprive you of one. Hahaha, of course of course. The clock read 3:30. Too late to make more you reckoned, painfully full as you were anyway. Haha.
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  19. Next time you'd make seven muffins, and next time...they'd show up. Silly little mare.

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