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The Misadventures of Derpy's Boobs 1.8

By Shroooomy
Created: 2022-08-27 04:24:21
Expiry: Never
applejackfluttershyrainbow dashderpyboobsmilkpinkieboopidkawkward

  1. 1.
    Chapter 13: Pinkie
  2. 2.
     
  3. 3.
    > The farmhouse rested atop the tallest hill in Sweet Apple Acres, At the end of a dusty pathway that sharply winded at an almost ninety degree angle.
  4. 4.
    “Finally.”
  5. 5.
    > I was exhausted.
  6. 6.
    > Making my way across the farm was always a pain
  7. 7.
    > The Apple family went to great efforts to preserve the land's natural beauty the best they could.
  8. 8.
    > All trails were formed naturally by hoof and the grass was unkempt like jungle weeds.
  9. 9.
    > The farm occupied a number of biomes from pond’s, swamps and caves.
  10. 10.
    > The land was an amalgamation of many unique ecosystems.
  11. 11.
    > Many of the different species of animals and plants that resided on the property are foreign to this part of Equestria.
  12. 12.
    > Fluttershy used to spend hours here naming each new creature she found.
  13. 13.
    > Sweet Apple Acres is a pristine, virgin land.
  14. 14.
     
  15. 15.
    > But despite all that…
  16. 16.
    > I still wish Applejack would pave a road through this fucking place.
  17. 17.
    > Every time I come here I get lost neck deep in a smelly old marsh or I find myself falling down a cavern hidden under a bush.
  18. 18.
    > Today was not the day for getting lost.
  19. 19.
    > But despite my best efforts I always did.
  20. 20.
    > My socks, shorts and shirt were soaked in swampy green slime after trudging through a chin deep wetland mud puddle for twenty minutes and I was beyond tired.
  21. 21.
    > My stomach was starting to feel a little funny too but not too bad that I couldn't ignore it.
  22. 22.
    > Funnily enough the words “Put a Bun In This Oven” Remained pronounced across my shirt.
  23. 23.
    > For a gag shirt it held up quite well.
  24. 24.
     
  25. 25.
    > Shortly after that I found myself in an evergreen forest getting pricked by pine needles that were no doubt stuck all throughout my mane and tail.
  26. 26.
    > Nature was getting its revenge
  27. 27.
    > The years of town life had softened me and weakened my Earth Pony instincts.
  28. 28.
    > I ascended the summit and saw the sun setting behind the westerly mountains, the sky was covered in fluffy purple clouds
  29. 29.
    > The only sunlight came through a large tear in the sky beyond rows of tidy apple trees that stretched for about a mile.
  30. 30.
     
  31. 31.
     
  32. 32.
    > The sun was shining over Old Ponyville like a spotlight
  33. 33.
    > Old Ponyville is a haunting place.
  34. 34.
    > A black stain on the county's history. A place I tried to put it in the back of my mind.
  35. 35.
     
  36. 36.
    > I don’t understand how Derpy and Fluttershy could near live in such place
  37. 37.
    > Visiting her after she lost her job was awful.
  38. 38.
    > The smell of egg was enough to make anypony sick.
  39. 39.
    >If I stayed too long I would start feeling extremely light headed and my vision would blur.
  40. 40.
     
  41. 41.
    > I felt sorry for Derpy.
  42. 42.
    > She's a good friend
  43. 43.
    > There is no pony more compassionate and sympathetic than her.
  44. 44.
    > I just wish she wasn’t so mousy.
  45. 45.
    > it was a major turn off.
  46. 46.
    >She lived closer to the mines than anypony and I worried for her
  47. 47.
     
  48. 48.
    > While everypony avoided the place like death she was practically bathing in a chemical stew of Celestia-Knows-What they found in those mines.
  49. 49.
    > I pitied them both. Derpy was too attached to her memories to abandon her ramshackle ball and chain while Fluttershy had the complacency of a whores husband and tolerated everything.
  50. 50.
    > Despite how hard I tried, sometimes you can’t help ponies that don't want to be helped.
  51. 51.
    > But I'll keep trying.
  52. 52.
     
  53. 53.
     
  54. 54.
    > I wiped my brow of sweat collecting a mixture of swamp slime and pine needles in my hoof.
  55. 55.
    > It was unbelievably humid but I was welcomed with a gentle breeze when I reached the summit.
  56. 56.
    >The view was wide and expensive and the sunset was gorgeous.
  57. 57.
    >The air up here was clean, fireflies hovered by the garden next to the rustic farmhouse, still charming as it was when the Apples raised almost a hundred years ago
  58. 58.
    > Or so I imagine.
  59. 59.
    > The place needed some work but I found its imperfections endearing.
  60. 60.
    > I took advantage of the much needed calmness.
  61. 61.
    > Despite it being a pain in the plot to get here it always felt like home to me
  62. 62.
    > It must be my Earth Pony instincts.
  63. 63.
    > Any pony who comes from a long line of ponies who love nothing more than playing in dirt and raising a family would feel at home here.
  64. 64.
    > I come from simple pleasures.
  65. 65.
    >....
  66. 66.
    > I’ve wasted too much time. I need to get some food for Marble.
  67. 67.
     
  68. 68.
    > I went up to the creaky wooden stairs and knocked on the old farmhouse door
  69. 69.
    > Rainbow’s head peaked through the crack in the door before opening it fully.
  70. 70.
    > She stood in the doorway wearing an ill-fitting black suit with a white undershirt covered in wrinkles.
  71. 71.
    > Her tie hung limply around her neck, not even tied, just placed around her neck like a rope.
  72. 72.
    > She smelled like whisky, her gaze was distant like a broken toy.
  73. 73.
    > Her face was limp, unmoving and lifeless.
  74. 74.
    > The wind howled through the porch
  75. 75.
    > This was awkward.
  76. 76.
     
  77. 77.
    > “Nice shirt.”
  78. 78.
    “Oh, Yeah, I just threw it on…I didn’t expect to see you here.” I said forcing myself to laugh
  79. 79.
    > “I live here.” Rainbow said blunt as a rock to the head.
  80. 80.
    “You sure do! You know,I never took you for a farmer.”
  81. 81.
    > “Well, All things considered I never took you as a prostitute.”
  82. 82.
    “Yeah…Neither did I.”
  83. 83.
    > The wind howled through the balcony only extenuating the awkwardness.
  84. 84.
    >...
  85. 85.
     
  86. 86.
    > Oh my fuck this was uncomfortable
  87. 87.
    > Okay, Just stay cool
  88. 88.
    > She ain’t worth the drama, she just wants to fight.
  89. 89.
    > Whatever she says, Just don't entertain it.
  90. 90.
    > I’m here for Marble.
  91. 91.
    > It’s all for Marble.
  92. 92.
     
  93. 93.
    > “Well, it's nice meeting up, you look great.”
  94. 94.
    > Her eyes narrowed
  95. 95.
    > I tried to walk past her but she stopped me with her hoof
  96. 96.
    > “I thought you had a party to plan.”
  97. 97.
    “I do! But I really need some apples.”
  98. 98.
    > “This isn’t a good time.”
  99. 99.
    “I know! I have guests coming over really soon! You’re still coming right?”
  100. 100.
    > "I don’t know."
  101. 101.
    > I’ve never felt so uncomfortable in my entire life.
  102. 102.
    > She was the only mare that could both make my heart flutter and give me a migraine at the same time.
  103. 103.
     
  104. 104.
    > “Pinkie, you should go.”
  105. 105.
    “Don’t worry I will, Just need to speak with AppleJack.”
  106. 106.
    > I tried to push my way past her again but she blocked me and sent my hooves pitter pattering across the porch with a large shove.”
  107. 107.
    “Hey! Don’t push me!”
  108. 108.
    > “Pinkie, I said leave.”
  109. 109.
    “She’s not just for you. She’s my friend too.”
  110. 110.
    > Rainbow leaned her front leg against the door frame
  111. 111.
    > “I’m not letting you in.”
  112. 112.
     
  113. 113.
    > How immature
  114. 114.
    > Rainbow’s always been a real piece of work
  115. 115.
    > She’s such a wannabe with her suit and drinking all the time.
  116. 116.
    > And she tells me to grow up.
  117. 117.
    > She wants to be cool so badly
  118. 118.
    “This isn’t about you Rainbow, I just wanna see Applejack.”
  119. 119.
    > Rainbow rolled her eyes
  120. 120.
    > “Yeah, I know. How come you never come here to ever see me.”
  121. 121.
    “Are you ready to apologize?”
  122. 122.
    > “Heck no.”
  123. 123.
    “Well, I guess we really don’t have much to talk about.”
  124. 124.
    > She stood in the doorway looking like she was going to pounce on me
  125. 125.
    > I didn’t have time for this.
  126. 126.
    > I hopped above her head and yelled into the house as loud as I could
  127. 127.
    “APPLEJACK! CAN I COME IN!?!”
  128. 128.
     
  129. 129.
    > Rainbow slammed her hoof on the floor
  130. 130.
    > "Why don't you ever listen!"
  131. 131.
    "Why are you so stubborn?"
  132. 132.
    > “Why are you so annoying!?"
  133. 133.
    "Why are you such a jerk!?"
  134. 134.
    > "Why do you always make everything so difficult!?" We yelled at the same time
  135. 135.
    > We both covered our mouths in unison
  136. 136.
    > Rainbow reached into her front pocket and fumbled a small pill in her hooves.
  137. 137.
    > She dropped it and it fell through a crack in the porch
  138. 138.
    > "Darn it Pinkie! I only get a couple of these a month."
  139. 139.
    "I'm sorry…What are they?"
  140. 140.
    > "They're for my…"
  141. 141.
     
  142. 142.
    > "What's with all the yelling!? Is that Pinkie?” Applejack called
  143. 143.
    > “Yeah, she won’t leave.”
  144. 144.
    >There was a long pause
  145. 145.
    > “Well let her in for Celestia’s sake!”
  146. 146.
    > Rainbow stared at me for a long moment
  147. 147.
    > “Best behavior Pinkie, I’m serious.”
  148. 148.
    I grabbed a horseshoe off the table and held it over my head like a halo
  149. 149.
    “Always.”
  150. 150.
    > Rainbow rolled her eyes and held the door open for me
  151. 151.
    > I stuck my tongue out at Dash as I trotted inside.
  152. 152.
    > "You are such a pain in the plot."
  153. 153.
    “You love it!” I giggled
  154. 154.
     
  155. 155.
     
  156. 156.
    > We went through the house and into the kitchen.
  157. 157.
    > Applejack was sitting at the table, her hooves wrapped around her head leaning into the table with a bottle of wine at a quick reach
  158. 158.
    > Rainbow stroked her arm on as she made her way to the keg of cider
  159. 159.
    > “Brave face AJ, Pinkie’s here.”
  160. 160.
    > She poured herself a cup of cider and grabbed a seat at the edge of the table opposite of Applejack.
  161. 161.
    > Dash sat with her front leg draped over the top of the chair while she stretched her back legs wide.
  162. 162.
    > Her breast were dodgeballs between her legs, she had a rip small in the suit that stretched from the bottom of her breasts to the dock of her tail
  163. 163.
    > I don’t think she noticed.
  164. 164.
    > But I could see everything.
  165. 165.
    > Like everything Dash did it was very unmare-like, unknowingly making a fool of herself once again.
  166. 166.
     
  167. 167.
    > I put my hoof on Applejacks head and stroked her mane.
  168. 168.
    > She shook with each frustrated breath, followed by a fit of sobs.
  169. 169.
    “What's wrong, Applejack?”
  170. 170.
    > Dash sat across from us holding her cup just below her chin. She looked like she had seen a ghost.
  171. 171.
    “Rainbow…What happened?”
  172. 172.
    > She darted her head to the ground and took large inhales of her cigarette, tapping her hoof incessantly and shaking like a cold breeze just swept through the room.
  173. 173.
    > Worry tugged at her face, her lips shivered and her eyes were stapled to the floorboards.
  174. 174.
     
  175. 175.
    > I knew Rainbow better than most
  176. 176.
    > And unfortunately, Rainbow did this a lot.
  177. 177.
    > Like most pegasi, she believed crying was weakness, instead of dealing with her emotions she would shut down.
  178. 178.
    > It was in her nature
  179. 179.
    > The pressures of the academy and the mentality she was expected to uphold exhausted her
  180. 180.
     
  181. 181.
    > It was well known that many pegasi preen themselves into flightlessness over less.
  182. 182.
    Rainbow was strong but she needed help.
  183. 183.
    > As much as it bothered me, I think being with Applejack is good for her. But she wasn't above her nature.
  184. 184.
    > She never asked for help and would preen herself a lot.
  185. 185.
    > It always hurt me seeing the way she treated herself.
  186. 186.
     
  187. 187.
    > While Rainbow was trying to compose herself, Applejack was buried in her hooves.
  188. 188.
    > These mares were beyond help.
  189. 189.
    “What happened Rainbow!?” I snapped
  190. 190.
    > Rainbow held her hoof over her mouth, I could see the tears welling in her eyes
  191. 191.
    > I new she wasn't going to cry
  192. 192.
    > She was too stubborn to allow herself.
  193. 193.
    > She started to heave like she was going to vomit
  194. 194.
    > This was killing me
  195. 195.
    > I sat on the edge of my seat
  196. 196.
    "Come on Rainbow…You can do it.
  197. 197.
    > Her heaving stopped and she paused for a moment.
  198. 198.
    > “Applejack lost the farm.” She spat thro8gh her hooves.
  199. 199.
     
  200. 200.
    > Her chair screeched along the floor as she jumped from her seat and through the rear door of the farmhouse.
  201. 201.
     
  202. 202.
    >Applejack lost the farm?
  203. 203.
    > No, this couldn't be true,
  204. 204.
    > It didn't make sense
  205. 205.
    > I turned to Applejack who was still sobbing intensely
  206. 206.
     
  207. 207.
    > I grabbed a seat next to her and pulled it close
  208. 208.
    “How did this happen?”
  209. 209.
    > Applejack lifted her head, her face was a red mess of tears.
  210. 210.
    > “Filthy Rich…He came around the farm earlier today an offered us a bunch of bits to buy the farm.”
  211. 211.
    > Applejack sniffled and poured herself a glass of wine.
  212. 212.
    “You sold him Sweet Apple Acres!?”
  213. 213.
    > “Of course not. I wouldn't sell the farm to nopony."
  214. 214.
    "Then what happened?"
  215. 215.
    After I refused he returned with a bunch of his big city lawyer types, saying he could have the farm shut down for causing mutations.”
  216. 216.
     
  217. 217.
    > Now I was starting to worry
  218. 218.
    “What kind of mutations?”
  219. 219.
    > “Apparently all the mares here in town have large breasts because there’s something in the dirt that contaminates the food.”
  220. 220.
    >I started to feel guilt wash over me
  221. 221.
    > I hope I didn’t unintentionally give Filthy this idea.
  222. 222.
     
  223. 223.
     
  224. 224.
    “But that can’t be true! You always take pride in your farm, you wouldn’t let ponies get sick!"
  225. 225.
    > I wiped a tear from her eye
  226. 226.
    > “He said that he would have Celestia's bureau of investigations come to inspect the property."
  227. 227.
    "That doesn't sound too bad, I'm sure you'll pass with flying colors!"
  228. 228.
    > Applejack slammed her glass on the the table
  229. 229.
    “One misdemeanor and we're done! I know those ponies up in Canterlot will find any excuse to shut down the farm so the princess can use the land for whatever she likes”
  230. 230.
    >Applejack poured herself another glass
  231. 231.
    > “She’ll probably use it to open an exotic animal petting zoo or sell it to some amusement park company.”
  232. 232.
     
  233. 233.
    “Applejack. I’m so sorry.”
  234. 234.
    >I hugged her and she gripped me tightly.
  235. 235.
    > I wasn’t sure what to say, this was the worst news ever.
  236. 236.
    > "I think Filthy is going to try and lower the property value."
  237. 237.
    > I pulled Applejack into me and leaned my head on her shoulder.
  238. 238.
     
  239. 239.
    “Don’t worry Applejack, I won’t let them take the farm. I Pinkie promise, I’ll have your back 100% of the way.”
  240. 240.
    > “You’ve always been a great friend Pinkie…But I think it might be too late. The time of family owned farms is over in these parts…"
  241. 241.
    Applejack stared at the bottle of wine looking distant
  242. 242.
    > Why would Filthy Rich want the farm?
  243. 243.
    > What would he need all this space for?
  244. 244.
     
  245. 245.
     
  246. 246.
    > Applejack slammed her glass on the table
  247. 247.
    > "Well I ain't movin! They can build whatever they want, this house is mine!"
  248. 248.
    "That's the spirit, Applejack!"
  249. 249.
    > Rainbow staggered back into the room wiping her Mouth with her sleeve.
  250. 250.
    > "Rainbow, Get ready for a fight! The two of us ain’t let them take the farm! They’ll have to take it from our cold, dead hooves."
  251. 251.
    > Rainbow held her mouth again and lurched forward
  252. 252.
    > "You alright sugar plum?"
  253. 253.
    >Rainbow nodded and rushed outside again
  254. 254.
    >The two of us turned to each other and sighed
  255. 255.
    > "Pegasi"
  256. 256.
     
  257. 257.
    > She felt her fiddling the curls of my mane
  258. 258.
    > “You’ve always been a great friend Pinkie.”
  259. 259.
    “You too Applejack.”
  260. 260.
    > We sat staring out the window above the sink
  261. 261.
    > The sun was almost down
  262. 262.
    > I didn’t want to leave her, but Marble was still at home and she needed food desperately.
  263. 263.
    "Applejack, I know this isn't the best time but I really need some apples, do you have a bag laying around I can have?"
  264. 264.
    > “Sadly Pinkie, I can’t let anypony eat any of the apples off the farm, I don’t want to risk anypony getting even a stomach ache and risk the bad publicity. But I had Applebloom pick some blueberries down in the valley this morning if that’ll do ya fine.”
  265. 265.
    “I guess those will do.”
  266. 266.
    > “RAINBOW!”
  267. 267.
    > She stumbled back inside
  268. 268.
    > “Open up the barn for Pinkie.”
  269. 269.
    > Rainbow nodded and grabbed the keys off the hook.
  270. 270.
     
  271. 271.
    > “You two play nice now, I ain’t in the mood for your melodramatics right now.”
  272. 272.
    > I followed Rainbow out the door and down the hill
  273. 273.
    > I hadn’t talked to Rainbow in a long time.
  274. 274.
    > Not that I didn’t want to. I still had a lot I wanted to say to her.
  275. 275.
    > Now wasn’t the time.
  276. 276.
    > But maybe I could tray and cheer her up a bit
  277. 277.
    > I can’t stand seeing the ponies I care about upset
  278. 278.
    “So, I guess you guys won’t be coming to the party then.”
  279. 279.
    > “We really aren’t in a party mood right now, Pinkie.”
  280. 280.
    “I know, I just hoped maybe it would give us an opportunity to talk again.”
  281. 281.
    > “What's there to talk about?”
  282. 282.
    > Unbelievable.
  283. 283.
    “Well for one…What the heck are you wearing?!”
  284. 284.
    > “What do you mean? It’s a suit.”
  285. 285.
    “I don’t think it would suit anypony.” I giggled
  286. 286.
    > “Really? You’re doing this now?”
  287. 287.
    “Of course! You’re not planning on wearing something this ridiculous again are you?”
  288. 288.
    > “You’re one to talk, You look like you crawled out of a swamp!”
  289. 289.
    “You got me there…”
  290. 290.
    > I hopped on top of a large boulder to get a better view of the barn
  291. 291.
    “Hey, why don’t you cut the grass around here. I bet you could do it in like…ten seconds flat.”
  292. 292.
    > “Ten seconds flat. I haven’t heard that one in a while.”
  293. 293.
    “Yeah! Flat, Like Cloudchaser.”
  294. 294.
    > Rainbow chuckled
  295. 295.
    > “Believe me, I’ve asked Applejack about it plenty. If she wanted it done, she’d be on my flank all day about it.”
  296. 296.
    “Are you telling me Applejack is bossier than you!?” I fained shock
  297. 297.
    > “She can be a bit of a headache, but she keeps me from foolin around. Farm life is all about discipline, you can’t slack off, which is the headspace I need to be in if I want to try for the Wonderbolts again.”
  298. 298.
     
  299. 299.
    > I plucked the ends off some grass and waved it in her face.
  300. 300.
    “It looks like you’re slacking.”
  301. 301.
    > “Well it is her farm. I can’t just start cutting things.”
  302. 302.
    “Oh please! You moved my stuff everywhere when we lived together. You even removed my ceiling fan because you said “It got in the way of your flying.”
  303. 303.
    > “Well, it was in my way a lot…Though I might have also done it to get on your nerves.”
  304. 304.
    “I knew it! You are evil!”
  305. 305.
    > “Oh relax. ”
  306. 306.
    “You put that much effort into getting on my nerves when all you needed to do was not try at all.”
  307. 307.
    > “Ok, Pinkie.” she grumbled
  308. 308.
     
  309. 309.
    “But I know what gets on your nerves…”
  310. 310.
    > I ran in front of her, our noses were but a couple inches apart as I trotted backwards.
  311. 311.
    > “Pinkie. NO.”
  312. 312.
    > I poked her nose
  313. 313.
    “Boop”
  314. 314.
    > “Pinkie.”
  315. 315.
    > I did it again
  316. 316.
    “Boop”
  317. 317.
    > “Pinkie stop…”
  318. 318.
    “Stop what!?”
  319. 319.
    > “Stop doing that!”
  320. 320.
    “You mean booping you?”
  321. 321.
    > “Yeah, stop it.”
  322. 322.
    “Say it! Say the word! I dare you!”
  323. 323.
    > I poked Rainbows nose again and again
  324. 324.
    > I knew she hated it
  325. 325.
    “Boop.”
  326. 326.
    “Boop.”
  327. 327.
    “Boop!”
  328. 328.
    “BOOP!”
  329. 329.
     
  330. 330.
    > “Buzz off Pinkie! Quit screwing around.”
  331. 331.
    > Rainbow smacked my hoof away
  332. 332.
    “Only if you say it.”
  333. 333.
    > “Are you doing this because I didn't apologize?” She huffed
  334. 334.
    > That got on my nerves
  335. 335.
    > I had so much I wanted to say.
  336. 336.
    > She had so many overdue apologies in the apology bank to cash in
  337. 337.
    > She owed me so much, she didn’t even realize.
  338. 338.
    > But I bit my tongue, now was not the time.
  339. 339.
    “Yeah, Apologize. For flashing me! You know that suit has a hole in the crotch right?”
  340. 340.
    >“It does not!”
  341. 341.
    > I trotted behind her and lifted her tail
  342. 342.
    “Yeah it does! Right here!
  343. 343.
    “Boop!”
  344. 344.
    > Rainbow jumped into the air
  345. 345.
     
  346. 346.
    > “Pinkie!”
  347. 347.
    “Oh Rainboop Dash, what happened? You used to love it when I booped your butt!”
  348. 348.
    > “Pinkie!” Rainbow growled
  349. 349.
    “Butt boops, Boobie boops, Beaver boops. I booped you in places you didn’t even know you had!”
  350. 350.
    > Rainbow rolled up her sleeves like she was getting ready for a fight
  351. 351.
    > As if I’d ever fight her.
  352. 352.
     
  353. 353.
    > “If you say boop one one more time…”
  354. 354.
    “HA! You said it!”
  355. 355.
    > Rainbow froze mid sentence, her mouth hung open and hoof still pointing
  356. 356.
    “I win!”
  357. 357.
    > Her eye twitched as she fluttered back down to the ground Her face started to redden.
  358. 358.
    >She tucked her head close to the ground, her legs and rump were in a pouncing position as she extended her wingspan above her head.
  359. 359.
    >Her wings were brimming with feathers sharp as razors, she had grinded her outer wingspan into a thick layer of daggers.
  360. 360.
    > The sunlight danced upon them making them sparkle like a fresh coat of glitter
  361. 361.
    > As her wings absorbed the sun's rays, they began to change color and flicker many different shades of blue, purple and pink.
  362. 362.
    “Look at you! So scary!” I teased
  363. 363.
    > She tackled me, sending us rolling back up the path
  364. 364.
    > When we were done spinning I found myself laying on my back, Rainbow’s hooves pressed over my shoulders.
  365. 365.
    > She had a mean look on her face.
  366. 366.
     
  367. 367.
    > She started poking my nose really fast
  368. 368.
    > “BoopBoopBoopBoop!” She yelled angrily
  369. 369.
    > I burst into a fit of laughter
  370. 370.
    “Stop!”
  371. 371.
    “This is assault! I’m being booped to death! Call the cuddle police!” I yelled between giggles
  372. 372.
    >Rainbow laughed as she poked my nose
  373. 373.
    > “You’re the only mare I’ve ever met that said the word “boop” What the heck does it even mean?
  374. 374.
    “I dunno…It just means..Boop.”
  375. 375.
    > “You're weird, you know that?”
  376. 376.
    “I prefer, fun”
  377. 377.
     
  378. 378.
     
  379. 379.
    >She continued to stand over me
  380. 380.
    "So are you and Applejack really going to go to fight this thing?"
  381. 381.
    >"Oh, That's just AJ talking tough. We had a conversation earlier about living with her cousin down in Appaloosa if things got out of hoof."
  382. 382.
    "Do you think you'd like it down there?"
  383. 383.
    > "What's not to love? Open space, nice weather."
  384. 384.
    "And you're Wonderbolts career?"
  385. 385.
    > "I'm still young! I just need to help Applejack with this farm situation before I give it another shot.”
  386. 386.
     
  387. 387.
     
  388. 388.
    >My eyes were drawn to a fleshy blemish covered in irritated scabs. Just beneath her where her torso met her wing,
  389. 389.
    > I didn’t want to bring it up, by my eyes were fixed on it like a nasty habit
  390. 390.
    > Some things I just can’t let slide
  391. 391.
    “You’ve been stress preening again.”
  392. 392.
    > She shut her wings and started to walk towards the barn doors
  393. 393.
    "Rainbow…Rainbow, come back.”
  394. 394.
    > "It's none of your business Pinkie."
  395. 395.
    "It is my business. I'm your friend."
  396. 396.
    >Rainbow stopped dead in her tracks
  397. 397.
    > "Just a little. But I'm fine, don't worry about it."
  398. 398.
    > I wish I could but it wasn't in my nature
  399. 399.
    “Does Applejack know?”
  400. 400.
    > “No. But once this situation is sorted out I’ll stop.”
  401. 401.
    >Liar
  402. 402.
    “I hope so, I don’t like seeing you like that.”
  403. 403.
    > “Oh quit it! You kicked me out, you don’t care about me.”
  404. 404.
    “I was doing what I thought was best. You think I don’t worry about you. But I worry a lot. Even though I probably shouldn't after the way you treat me. I wish you could just be honest.”
  405. 405.
    > "Friends don't do what you did to me."
  406. 406.
    "You were scaring me! I tried my hardest…I did what I did because I loved you.”
  407. 407.
    > “Listen pinkie, Applejack and I are happy. What we had was fun while it lasted. But I’m with Applejack now…So it’s best if you move on too.”
  408. 408.
     
  409. 409.
    > Rainbow unlocked the barn door and shoved it open
  410. 410.
    > The door squealed until it slammed against the inside wall
  411. 411.
    > It was dark, the only light came from the left hoof side of the barn where the sunlight punched through the holes.
  412. 412.
    > The light shot across the barn in short beams across the barn
  413. 413.
    >It reminded me of the disco ball at Pacific Glows club in Manehatten
  414. 414.
    > I went inside looking for the blueberries.
  415. 415.
    >“I’ve gotta get back to the house, remember to lock the barn when you’re done.”
  416. 416.
    > She gave me the keys and made her way back up the hill.
  417. 417.
     
  418. 418.
    > I stumbled my way through the dark barn, dragging my hooves over any available surface.
  419. 419.
    > Maybe I wasn’t being fair to Rainbow, she seemed to be doing a little better without me.
  420. 420.
    > Maybe I’m the one who needs to let go.
  421. 421.
    >I stumbled upon a small sack resting on top of of a barrel
  422. 422.
    > I dug my hooves inside the pouch and helped myself, it was the blueberries
  423. 423.
    > All twenty of them.
  424. 424.
    > What a waste of time
  425. 425.
    > Marble would finish this in a second
  426. 426.
     
  427. 427.
    > I made my way back
  428. 428.
    > The sun began shining through the cracks in the barn and I spotted something shining atop a cart hidden under a tarp
  429. 429.
    > I removed it and uncovered four large steel drums with taps
  430. 430.
    > I knocked the side of one of them with my ear pressed against it.
  431. 431.
    > It sounded full
  432. 432.
    > I cranked the valve and the contents started to slowly drip.
  433. 433.
    > It was thick like cream and white as snow
  434. 434.
    > Milk?
  435. 435.
    >I didn’t know Applejack had cows
  436. 436.
    >I wiped my hoof under the tap and brought it to my mouth
  437. 437.
    > It was definitely milk.
  438. 438.
    >super sweet milk! What was she feeding these cows? Pure sugar?
  439. 439.
    > I decided to help myself to a couple hoof-fulls.
  440. 440.
    > The initial flavour bit at the tastebuds with its harsh, sickly sugar taste that played in my mouth like fire.
  441. 441.
    > After the stinging saccharin resided the milk cooled my pallet with a soft marshmallow flavour and the thickness of cream.
  442. 442.
    > I was staggered by the many different tastes.
  443. 443.
    > It was like a marshmallow fucked a cupcake and I was drinking the cum dripping from the cupcakes…..
  444. 444.
    > It was amazing.
  445. 445.
    > Like nothing I had ever tried before.
  446. 446.
     
  447. 447.
    > I found myself in a predicament
  448. 448.
    > A barrel this big would keep Marble busy all night.
  449. 449.
    > On one hoof I didn't like stealing from friends but it wasn't like I had any other options at this point.
  450. 450.
    > I already spent half the afternoon trying to find something for her to eat.
  451. 451.
    > I also needed to get back to Sugar Cube Corner to start the party.
  452. 452.
    > I leaned the barrel onto its side and rolled it off the wagon.
  453. 453.
    >I pushed the keg out the barn and down the lane.
  454. 454.
    > I felt like a total jerk
  455. 455.
    > I didn’t want to do this, but I had to.
  456. 456.
    > I have a family too
  457. 457.
    > And they needed me.
  458. 458.
     
  459. 459.
     
  460. 460.
    Chapter 14: DERPY
  461. 461.
     
  462. 462.
    > We whipped past the welcome sign into town
  463. 463.
    > Only ten minutes till we got back back to Rarity’s
  464. 464.
    > I was squished between Fluttershy's breasts the entire ride trying not to show how uncomfortably aroused I was.
  465. 465.
    > I had given up on trying to think straight.
  466. 466.
    > I couldn't resist my urges
  467. 467.
    > Somewhere between exiting the mine and the entrance to town I decided wanted to have sex with Fluttershy.
  468. 468.
     
  469. 469.
    > I never thought much about gay sex.
  470. 470.
    > But started thinking about how it would work practicality.
  471. 471.
    > Between us we had six breasts, two butts, and two pairs of….Naughty bits.
  472. 472.
    > But the question remained
  473. 473.
    > How do two mares have sex?
  474. 474.
    > We were missing half the ingredients for baking a complete love muffin.
  475. 475.
    > I looked back up at Fluttershy
  476. 476.
    > Her hair flowed in the wind
  477. 477.
     
  478. 478.
    > I wanted to run my hoof through her hair and press my face into hers
  479. 479.
    > I wanted to squeeze my passion into her body like I did my old pillow.
  480. 480.
    ,> Share her breath and possess her energies.
  481. 481.
    > I want to drag my hoof over her crotch and drink her juices and milk her like a cow
  482. 482.
    > If only I had the nerve.
  483. 483.
     
  484. 484.
    > "Sorry about this…I know it must be super awkward for you."
  485. 485.
    "No, it's ok. I like your boobs….They're very nice."
  486. 486.
    >"Oh, well that's very sweet. I like your boobs too."
  487. 487.
    "Thanks."
  488. 488.
    >...
  489. 489.
    > "Do you like the ones on my chest or the ones between my legs better?"
  490. 490.
    >...
  491. 491.
    > "Well…I think they're both nice. The ones on your chest are certainly bigger and more exciting…But the ones under your rump are nice too."
  492. 492.
    >...
  493. 493.
    "Do you like my butt?"
  494. 494.
    > Fluttershy's eyes darted back to the road
  495. 495.
    > Why did I say that?
  496. 496.
    > I'm such an idiot.
  497. 497.
    > "You have a nice butt..It's big…But in a good way."
  498. 498.
    >...
  499. 499.
    > "That's good."
  500. 500.
    >...
  501. 501.
    > I'm starting to think ponies as awkward as us weren't meant to talk to each other.
  502. 502.
    >...
  503. 503.
    > "I also really like your eyes."
  504. 504.
    "You're…Probably the only Pony in town who does.,"
  505. 505.
    > "They remind me of embers and golden autumn leaves."
  506. 506.
    >...
  507. 507.
    "Your eyes remind me of…
  508. 508.
    >Come on, woo her!
  509. 509.
    > Say something romantic.
  510. 510.
    "eggs."
  511. 511.
    > "Eggs?"
  512. 512.
    "Yeah…they're white….and shaped like eggs."
  513. 513.
     
  514. 514.
    > Stupid brain
  515. 515.
    > Fluttershy laughed
  516. 516.
    > "Oh Muffins! You always have the most unique way of looking at things."
  517. 517.
    > Fluttershy chuckled and ruffled my mane
  518. 518.
    > "You're such a silly filly!"
  519. 519.
    > "And you're so….yellow….Like a baby chick
  520. 520.
    >...
  521. 521.
    > “Ummm…Is this your way of calling me chicken?"
  522. 522.
    > I blew it
  523. 523.
    > I'm never going to get laid
  524. 524.
    > "Of course not! Chickens are weird…You're…Beautiful."
  525. 525.
    > "Oh Muffins! Are you flirting with me?" she asked, teasing her mane.
  526. 526.
    > She’s onto me!
  527. 527.
    > "No…I'm just…Being nice…"
  528. 528.
    >...
  529. 529.
    > "Oh…. I see…I’m glad that we’re friends
  530. 530.
    “Me too.”
  531. 531.
    > “Just friends!”
  532. 532.
    “Yep, two very close friends.”
  533. 533.
    > “The best of friends.”
  534. 534.
    “Exactly. The best of friends.”
  535. 535.
    >...
  536. 536.
    > I’m pathetic
  537. 537.
     
  538. 538.
    > When we arrived back at the Boutique a line of angry ponies stood waiting.
  539. 539.
    > Fluttershy parked the scooter close to the door and we rushed past the bickering ponies, charging through the doors.
  540. 540.
    > I could hear the the crowd jeering as we entered
  541. 541.
    > Rarity’s boutique was in shambles, pieces of cloth littered the floor and half finished dresses hung from the clothing racks.
  542. 542.
    “We got the stuff, Rarity!”
  543. 543.
     
  544. 544.
    > “Perfect! I just finished your outfit!”
  545. 545.
    > Rarity pulled the dress from the rack and I was floored
  546. 546.
    > I colour was hint darker than my coat and every inch was decorated in yellow and silver jewels
  547. 547.
    > I threw the jersey to the floor and it landed with a loud WHAP! And put on the dress on as fast as I could
  548. 548.
    > It wrapped around my backside and draped over my sides hiding the containers, a white cloth hung from beneath my neck down to my hooves.
  549. 549.
    >My gosh
  550. 550.
    >It even had my cutiemark embroidered on the front.
  551. 551.
    > I twirled myself in the mirror adoring the dress
  552. 552.
    > “You look absolutely marvellous darling. Just one more thing.”
  553. 553.
    >Rarity pulled out a pair of snow white socks and four black horseshoes.
  554. 554.
    >I threw them on immediately
  555. 555.
    >I could feel myself tearing up
  556. 556.
    > I didn’t just look pretty
  557. 557.
    > I felt pretty
  558. 558.
    > Rarity…I don’t know what to say…”
  559. 559.
     
  560. 560.
    > “You certainly gave me quite the challenge. I’m sure you’ll be the best dressed. For the party tonight.”
  561. 561.
    > “You really think so!?”
  562. 562.
    > “Well…I spent so much time on your dress I neglected all my other orders. So I imagine you’ll be the belle of the ball…Sort of speak.”
  563. 563.
    > I was going to be the shining star of the party and it felt great
  564. 564.
    > I turned to Fluttershy and hugged her
  565. 565.
    > “Thanks Fluttershy! I couldn’t do this without you.”
  566. 566.
    > “You two love birds, have fun.” Rarity snickered.
  567. 567.
    > “I’ve got a ton of outfits I need to finish before those ponies outside break down my door.”
  568. 568.
    > Lovebirds?
  569. 569.
    > How did she know I wanted to sleep with Fluttershy?
  570. 570.
    > Was Rarity reading my mind?
  571. 571.
    > Unicorns are scary.
  572. 572.
     
  573. 573.
    > I pulled myself off Fluttershy and looked back in the mirror
  574. 574.
    > What an embarrassing show of affection
  575. 575.
    > "Rarity, do you have another's girdle? I sort of…lost mine."
  576. 576.
    > Rarity glanced down at Fluttershy’s boobs that laid on the floor at her hooves.
  577. 577.
    > Rarity looked flustered, as if she didn’t notice her friend's breasts pooling around her hooves.
  578. 578.
    > "How did you…Did you lose my only…Oh Fluttershy.”
  579. 579.
     
  580. 580.
    > Fluttershy stared at the floor and swung her hoof back and forth in a slow, morose fashion.
  581. 581.
    > “Well I do have something, But I have to warn you, It’s far from high fashion.”
  582. 582.
    > Rarity went to her chest and pulled out a a couple bungee straps with hooks on the end
  583. 583.
    > "Will this do?"
  584. 584.
    > Fluttershy didn't look impressed
  585. 585.
    > “Those will wonder wonderfully!” She replied with an unconvincing smile.
  586. 586.
    > Rarity gave me the bungees
  587. 587.
    > “Help her get these on, I need to get back to my work before I have a riot on my hooves.”
  588. 588.
     
  589. 589.
    > Fluttershy’s face turned red and started rubbing her hoof along her leg
  590. 590.
    > My heart started to beat
  591. 591.
    > I was going to touch her breasts
  592. 592.
    > First base here I come!
  593. 593.
    > I ran my hoof along her backside with the straps in hoof
  594. 594.
    > "Be gentle back there."
  595. 595.
     
  596. 596.
    > I pulled it around her back and down towards her breasts
  597. 597.
    > They were very heavy and rolled around in my hooves like jelly.
  598. 598.
    > “Oh! Be careful, I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”
  599. 599.
    > Lifting her boobs required all my strength and willpower.
  600. 600.
    > They were also super heavy
  601. 601.
    > But with all my strength I managed
  602. 602.
     
  603. 603.
    > I tied the straps around her and back and around her breasts a couple times and finally I was done
  604. 604.
    > They helped a little, her nipples were hanging half an inch from the ground, it didn’t look pleasant but at least they weren't lying on the floor anymore
  605. 605.
    > The bands sounded like they were about to snap and pressed into her sides harshly
  606. 606.
    "Are you sure you're OK with this, it looks really uncomfortable."
  607. 607.
    > "It's fine…Let's just get to the party."
  608. 608.
    > Fluttershy grabbed a bottle of wine from Rarity’s wine rack and the two of us trotted back to the scooter
  609. 609.
    > When we left I could feel every ponies eyes glued on me.
  610. 610.
    > For the first time I didn’t feel embarrassed.
  611. 611.
    > I was happy.

The misadventures of Derpy's Boobs 1.5

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The Misadventure Of Derpy's Boobs 1.6

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The misadventures of Derpy's Boobs 1.7

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The Misadventures of Derpy's Boobs 1.8

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The Misadventures of Derpy's Boobs 1.8

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