Pinkie the Sex Maniac

>perfectly catchy name

>cute as a button

>great sense of humor

>and a smile as wide as a mile.

And she was all your’s, giggling and bouncing up and down on your lap.

 

Being such a good singer, she has an impeccable sense of rhythm, bouncing up and down like a pro. Slowly her giggles turn into moans, which was always adorable. You tilt your head back, and just before you release your load, all the weight in her body vanishes, and you hear laughter again. Only it’s a little deeper and more British, followed by a “Narf!” You shoot up and discover your pink pony waifu has been replaced by a little white mouse.

 

“This feels good, Nonny! Poit! Keep going!”

 

“Who-who the fuck are you?”

 

“I’m Pinky.”

 

“No you’re not, you’re a mouse!”

 

“Exactly! Narf! And if you cum inside me with your big monkey willy, I’ll change again.”

 

“Are you serious?”

 

“Yup, it’s all part of Brain’s plan to take over your knob!”

 

This was fucking weird. I mean, Pinkie Pie’s always been weird, but this had to be a bad dream. Well, whatever. You close your eyes and try to pretend that your dick is in a party pony pussy, not a 4 inch tall mouse that’s even smaller than it. (Not by much, lol). In your head, this is Pinkie Pie, not Pinky the mouse with a plan for willy domination. You pray to Celestia that he’ll be replaced by Pinkie Pie again once you climax.

 

You were naive.

 

Now there’s a black and white dog girl on your lap with a pink dress and flower in her ears. She greets you with “Helloooo, Nonny!”, and right then and there you knew you weren’t escaping this fever dream any time soon.

 

“What the fuck are you!?”

 

“I’m cute, and you’re my new boyfriend!”, she exclaims, before giving you a huge smooch on the lips. You’re very frightened by the thought that she could be underage, but a part of your mind assures you she’s actually like 90 years old. So it’s all good. Anime logic. It doesn’t matter because she’s still so small that you can’t get your cock out of her pussy. It doesn’t bother her, she’s having the time of her life, yelling “Boingy! Boingy! Boingy!”

 

Her cutesy charm isn’t winning you over, you just want to go back to Pinkie Pie for pete’s sake. She keeps yelling “boingy” louder and louder until she takes off like a rocket. Your vision is smokey, but you feel a larger, furry behind on your legs. Okay, NOW Pinkie has to be back, right?

 

“Hey kid, are you gonna make me orgasm? I haven’t got all day here, Nonny!”

 

Jesus Christ, it’s a giant gray squirrel! Sounds middle aged, too. Well, this is gonna be a challenge. Sure enough, you find it very difficult to please her. You almost kinda want to, she seems to know comedy, but her lines aren’t that funny when all her jabs are directed at you.

 

“Come on, my little acorn’s feeling nothin’!”

“That’s it, put more exaggeration into those movements!”

“You fuck like a Filmation character!”

“Stop with the giggling, you’re reminding me of a young Flipper!”

 

It’s only enjoyable because she’s making jokes, not because she’s pleasant to have sex with. You can only say “sorry” and “yes ma’am”, as if you’re under some sort of spell. But you’re best isn’t good enough, as she slowly gets restless.

 

“Ugh, fine. If you aren’t gonna give me a good climax, guess I gotta end the cartoon myself.”

 

She pulls a stick of dynamite out of her…hopefully her tail and shoves it in your mouth. Before you know it, your ears have burst and you see and feel nothing but a vortex of fire and smoke. When your vision recovers from the blast, you notice that the squirrel has been replaced by a pigeon with a toothy grin, fluttering on top of you.

GOD DAMNIT!

 

It says “As far back as I can remember, I’ve always wanted your dick in my ass, Nonny.” Now this is getting creepy, and really gross. You do not like this pigeon. Its smug aura scares and arouses you.

 

“Get the fuck off me!” you yell at him, and try to push him off. The little shit is persistent though, and clings his toes to your balls, briefly paralyzing you. “Not on your life. You’re my little faggot.”

 

>jazz music stops

 

“What did you just call me?”

 

“I said you’re a faggot, that’s all.” Oh, he asked for it.

 

“Are you saying I’m a bundle of sticks? That I’m a faggot to you!? Is that what you’re saying!?”

 

“No, no! I said you’re a bundle of joy, it’s a compliment!”, he seems to be telling the truth on his end. You could feel his heartbeat and temperature rising.

 

Then you figure this could just be how he gets off.

 

“THAT’S IT!”

 

You reach down and start beating him to a pulp, yelling every obscenity you can. It gets difficult to tell what’s happening with all the dust and feathers flying around you, but you could not expect him to kiss you on the lips. Okay, yeah, this was definitely his fetish.

 

That kiss was the last thing you could remember when you woke up back in your bed, tucked in nice with Pinkie Pie at your side. The one and only pink party pony.

 

“So how was that for a roleplay session, Nonny?”

 

You, a quivering mess covered in fur, ash and pigeon droppings, can only say “Let’s never roleplay again, Pinkie.”

 

“Aw, okay. Good night, Nonny. Zort.”