The Misadventures of Derpy Hooves Part 2



                                            Fluttershy:


                                            > Muffins sat across the table staring down at the lone muffin which her dad had placed in front of her some time ago.

                                            > She was unusually quiet and looked distraught

                                            > I could always tell when she was feeling down

                                            > It's not like she could keep her feelings a secret even if she tried


                                            > I had seen her adorn every mood

                                            > But usually it was coupled with her signature unstoppable energy

                                            > It wasn't usual seeing her this quiet

                                            > Or to not tell me what was bothering her

                                            > Since we met she was never shy of expressing herself and never kept any secrets from me

                                            > At least as far as I'm aware


                                            > So we sat in the kitchen across from one another in silence

                                            > I didn’t know what to say

                                            > All my questions were met with shrugs and sighs

                                            > She didn’t look me in the eye and hadn’t even touched her muffin


                                            > Across the kitchen, Mr. Hooves was putting away the dishes

                                            > Not even the shuffling of glass filled the room

                                            > Because Mr. Hooves doesn’t own any glass dishes

                                            > He told in me once that he stopped buying breakable utensils for Derpy because she has the habit of dropping breaking them

                                            > I can't imagine how frustrating it is buying a brand new set of dish-ware only to have them broken in a couple weeks


                                            > The old house began to creak as a particularly harsh wind blew through town

                                            > Stepping into Muffins house always gave me anxiety

                                            > I always fearer the entire place would topple over at the slightest breeze and we'd be trapped under a hundred pounds of wooden planks


                                            > The seemed well built but the years of neglect were prominent

                                            > I guess neglect wasn't the best word, because Mr. Hooves seemed to always be keeping himself busy fixing something

                                            > But as hard as he tried, some problems were beyond his talent to fix

                                            > The most alarming example of decay was in Muffins room

                                            > I’ve known Muffins for years and her room still has a gaping hole above her bed

                                            > No matter how hard he tried he just couldn’t fix the roof


                                            > Muffins calls it her sunroof

                                            > I don’t know if she actually believes that's what it is or if her dad told her that to hide his failure as a roofer from her

                                            > The entire house was a depressing scene


                                            > Behind the peeling wallpaper, termites had punctured hoof sized holes

                                            > I squinted through one of the larger holes and peaked outside, using the structural damage as a tiny window

                                            > I watched the leaves blow down the lonely old street

                                            > I sighed


                                            > It’s the first day of summer and I was stuck inside with a miserable Muffins and her basket case father

                                            > I sighed again

                                            > I know I shouldn’t think of him like that

                                            > Too many ponies in town treat him like dirt

                                            > He likes to pretend I don’t see it, but anypony with eyes could see how ponies clear a path whenever he’s in town


                                            > Muffins dad isn’t a rich pony

                                            > At least not anymore

                                            > Apparently their was a time he was one of the wealthiest ponies this side of Canterlot Mountain

                                            > He was some kind of union leader or mayor

                                            > I don’t fully understand what he did

                                            > Even though he’s taken every opportunity to talk my ears off about his work

                                            > Negotiating, making deals and being an important part of Old Ponyville history

                                            > I guess that's because all he has left is stories


                                            > The ponies in town proper call the entire mining area Old Ponyville

                                            > Despite it being founded years after the Apples settled here

                                            > I don’t know…

                                            > Ponyville history is strange and I try to stay out of it the best I can


                                            > All I can say on the matter is that it’s only Derpy and him who live out here and it’s the loneliest piece of Equestria I’d ever laid eyes on

                                            > I in a way I kinda live in “Old Ponyville” Too

                                            > My cottage isn’t too far from Muffins house

                                            > It’s on the other side of the mining camp on a small plot of land my parents bought for me

                                            > They got it for really cheap and I’m thankful every day for forking out the bits for my own place where I can wake up and place my hooves on solid ground


                                            > The three of us debated even buying the place, but with a little charm and a couple promises I was able to win them over

                                            > I didn’t like living in the clouds

                                            > Cloudsdale is a busy place and all the ponies there are too lost in the hustle and bustle to appreciate the more gentle parts of life

                                            > I silence is nice too

                                            > No more arrogant Pegasi flying a hundred miles an hour over the house or zeppelins cutting through the backyard


                                            > It’s just me, myself and I

                                            > And thats how I like it

                                            > Personally, I don’t think I’m a pony who would ever want to live with any pony

                                            > I like my peace and quiet way too much.

                                            > Mom and Dad keep saying that’ll change, but I have my doubts


                                            > Theirs no better place for a pony like me than on the outskirts of Old Ponyville

                                            > It’s cheap

                                            > Quiet

                                            > And I have Ponyville proper just a short trot down the hill

                                            > Though, I don’t know what happened to Old Ponyville

                                            > Mr. Hooves has all kinds of stories about pretty much everything that happened in town

                                            > And he never just speaks casually about it either

                                            > His voices fills with arresting passion when talking about his union leader days

                                            > He practically founded the place

                                            > But he never talks about how it became so empty…


                                            > Nowadays, he just stays home

                                            > He decided to retire from that life and choose a life of solitude

                                            > He keeps himself busy with other things now

                                            > His hooves are always dirty doing something

                                            > Gardening

                                            > Cooking

                                            > Carpentry

                                            > Roofing

                                            > Painting

                                            > He seems kinda lonely

                                            > Like he’s trying to fill a hole


                                            > Sometimes I help him with his chores

                                            > Celestia knows he needs all the help he can get

                                            > As much as I mock it, this place would’ve probably collapsed years ago if he wasn’t stapling it together every week

                                            > After our chores he pays me a couple bits and he he’ll usually tell me  story about the good old days

                                            > His union job

                                            > His time as mayor

                                            > His wife…

                                            > Which is always a difficult conversation to navigate.


                                            > Though, he mostly talks a about Muffins

                                            > I can tell just by his tones that he cares about her a lot

                                            > Now, many ponies would assume that being a her father that him loving her is to be expected

                                            > But none of my other friends parents talk about their filly like Mr. Hooves does Muffins


                                            > The way his eyes light up and his goofy smile wiggles across his cheeks says it all

                                            > But sometimes I fear he may be a little overprotective

                                            > He worries a lot about her

                                            > And confines in me more than I’m comfortable with


                                            > I’m not a fan of how he tries to pry things from me

                                            > I guess its because he has no other pony to talk to

                                            > And Muffins isn’t the easiest pony to get a straight answer from


                                            > Heck, I’m her best friend and sometimes it feels like pulling teeth trying to get her to explain whatever crazy idea is going on in her silly head

                                            > I hate to say it, but she’s been dubbed “Distracted Derpy” for a reason

                                            > Muffins doesn’t have many friends

                                            > She tells me that the fillies in flight school have started calling her “Derpy” Because of the way she flies and her wonky eyes

                                            > Her speech impediment is also a point of mockery


                                            > I promised Muffins that I wouldn’t tell her dad about the things we talk about

                                            > Knowing that I’ll keep her secrets has led her to open up more to me than she otherwise would

                                            > And I try my best not to talk about the bullying with Mr. Hooves

                                            > Because I know for a fact it would cause him to worry more than he already does

                                            > Mr. Hooves reached his hoof over my head and placed a cup of orange juice in front of me

                                            > He then grabbed a seat between the two of us at the table

                                            > We shared a quick glance

                                            > He looked distraught


                                            > His tired brown eyes sunken into his skull

                                            > He looked frazzled

                                            > This isn’t my first time playing therapist for Mr. Hooves

                                            > And I know that the longer Muffins kept her silence, the more worried he’d become


                                            > “Muffins…I would like you to tell me what happened today at Flight School.”  Mr. Hooves said in a soft voice

                                            > She was still as a statue

                                            > Eyes locked on the muffin her dad set out for her ages ago

                                            > Usually she devours them quicker than he can cook them

                                            > Today must’ve been a very bad day


                                            > “Muffins…I want you to talk to us. Fluttershy came all the way across town to see if you were okay. What's on your mind?”

                                            > She glanced up at him through her bangs but her eyes shot back down to the table

                                            > Her hooves resting along the edge of the table stroking the wood anxiously


                                            > Mr. Hooves looked back at me

                                            > His expression said it all

                                            > Whenever Muffins was in one of her moods he would ask me to come visit

                                            > I’m pretty good at cheering her up, but she looked absolutely heartbroken

                                            > I sighed and reached my hoof out towards her


                                            “Muffins, you don’t need to be shy…We care about you very much, and it’s always better to talk about your problems than bottling them up inside. We know something’s bothering you. Just tell us. What do you need to get them off your chest?”

                                            > She peaked her head up nervously

                                            > I shot her a smile

                                            > “Y..Y..You don’t underst..a..a..nd…I..I just don’t…wanna…t..talk about it…”


                                            > She had the Cadence of a stuttering engine and sounded like her mouth was clogged by marshmallows

                                            > It was hard to understand her sometimes but with a careful ear I could usually make it out

                                            > Believe it or not, their was a time when her speaking was much worse

                                            > I don’t think she possesses much control over her tongue

                                            > But her speech therapy has help her come a long way


                                            > Mr. Hooves leaned back into his seat

                                            > I could tell he was stressed

                                            > I could only imagine how long he had been trying to get her to open up before I arrived

                                            “Muffins…I’ve been hearing rumours…I know what's being said about you isn’t true…”


                                            > I glanced over at Mr. Hooves

                                            > Sometimes I feel like I have to choose my words carefully to spare his feelings

                                            > Sometimes I think his feelings are more fragile than hers

                                            > After all, she's all he has left

                                            “Just tell us what happened.”


                                            > "I..I said I d…d…don't wan..nnnnna talk about it!"

                                            > She grabbed the muffin off the table and began marching out of the kitchen

                                            > She stopped in the doorway into the hall and turned to us

                                            > “Y…Yoooouuuu…you..you!... m…mmmm…m..make me…sssssooo…soooo…sssoooo… aaaannnnngry!”

                                            > “Muffins, please.” Mr. Hooves pleaded

                                            “I…I…I d..don’t w..w..want t…to talkkkk..a..a..a..about it!”

                                            > She stormed out of the room and I could hear he hooves stomping upstairs to her bedroom

                                            > Mr. Hooves sighed


                                            > “Fluttershy, can you go talk to her?"

                                            "Of course."

                                            > I pulled myself from my seat

                                            > "Tell me everything." He said in a very serious tone

                                            > I nodded gingerly and made my way upstairs


                                            > I entered her room and she was pacing around her room in a rage

                                            > Her room was a severe case of arrested development

                                            > Stuffed Animals littered the floor and she had a tattered Daring Do blanket draped over her untidy bed

                                            > “I…I hate F…light S..S…chooool F…llllutttterssss! It’s s..so sssstupid!”

                                            > She picked a teddy bear off the floor and began smacking it around

                                            > I needed to calm her down

                                            > I could hardly make out what she was saying

                                            “Relax, we didn’t mean to upset you, we just wanted to know what's wrong. You can tell me what happened…I won’t tell your dad if you don’t want me too.”

                                            > She stood wiping her tears


                                            > “Ponies are making fun of me because my boobs haven't grown in!”

                                            > I was taken aback

                                            > Of all the things I thought she would be angry about this was the last thing I expected

                                            “Oh…Well, that's okay. I’m sure they’ll grow soon.”

                                            > “They're calling me a teatlet!”

                                            > Ponyville sure has some strange words

                                            > I've never heard of a "teatlet" until I moved down here

                                            > And I hadn’t seen ponies with bust this big either

                                            > It must be in the food

                                            > From my understanding Pegasi aren't supposed to have big breasts anyway

                                            > But around here, it seems like having a normal breast size is unheard of


                                            > Derpy is a couple years younger than me

                                            > But sometimes she acts like a filly

                                            > I love her like a good friend

                                            > But she can be a little overwhelming

                                            > “I’m flat Fluttershy! Flat! No pony likes a mare with no tits!”

                                            > Muffins was cursed with many unfortunate qualities aside from her speech impediments and her eyes

                                            > She was on the heavier side and was a little slow

                                            > It’s not that she’s stupid, she just thinks differently and it takes her a while to reach the same conclusions

                                            > Though her eccentricities may make some uncomfortable, I always found her quirks endearing

                                            > No pony is more approachable or kind than her

                                            >

                                            > I jumped on her bed and invited her to sit

                                            > She hopped up beside me and wrapped her hooves around me tight

                                            > I felt warm chills run up my spine


                                            > I’ve always had a soft spot for this silly filly

                                            > “Cloudchaser’s mean…She says I’m flat.”

                                            “What did I say about listening to Cloudchaser?”

                                            > “To…Not to…?”

                                            “She’s just a spoiled brat. She’ll get what's coming to her eventually.”

                                            > She nuzzled her face into my chest

                                            > “I guess…I just hope she doesn’t do it again.”

                                            > I sighed

                                            > Once her stuttering stopped I knew she was calm


                                            > Whatever she was hiding was starting to gnaw at me

                                            > But I know how to get answers out of her

                                            > I just need to ask my questions in a less direct way

                                            “So, you aren’t back to talking with Cloudcahser are you?”

                                            > “No…I mean…She said that…She wanted to be friends again..but…C..Cloudchaser can be very mean…”

                                            “She didn’t hurt you did she?”

                                            > “Not physically.”

                                            “Well, what did she do?”

                                            > “She’s been telling ponies that I’m slow…I’m not slow! I’m the fastest pony in the entire school! It's just my stupid eyes!”

                                            > Bless her heart


                                            “Well…Maybe your dad can take you to the doctor.”

                                            > “No! I hate the doctor! They always poke me and tell me something I don’t like.”

                                            “Such as?”

                                            > “He said I was fat! Doctors are just bullies like Cloudchaser.”


                                            > I was at a loss for words

                                            > Sure, she’s a little chubby, but I wouldn’t call her fat

                                            > She's a normal size, being half earth pony and all

                                            > Not the most elegant Pegasi

                                            > And generally not the smartest…

                                            > I’ve heard her mix described as “turkeys”

                                            > Depending on how the traits are spliced she had the potential


                                            > Instead, Muffins got the worst of both races

                                            > She stores fat like and earth pony, but has the fragile bones and height of a Pegasi

                                            > Standing, she’s half the size of her peers in her age group and I have little faith she has much more growing to do


                                            > She’s a Pegasi like her mother

                                            > Heck, she even has the same eyes and coat colour

                                            > But had the physique of her father

                                            > Large barrel an


                                            > For her sake I hope those earth pony genes give her earth pony breasts

                                            > Just so she can be a little less self conscious about herself


                                            “I wouldn’t worry about what Cloudchaser has to say about anything. She’s got nothing down there herself. Don’t sweat it for a second.”

                                            > “I guess you’re right.” She sniffled

                                            > I felt a little guilty about not being t Muffins like I should

                                            > The poor mare needs a destruction

                                            > I’d like to believe she isn’t the type to engage in stress preening

                                            > But I don’t think any Pegasi is

                                            > We all have our breaking point


                                            > I’ve been debating about inviting her to Rainbow, Pinkie and I’s get together

                                            > They both see her as a friend

                                            > My only fear is that the outing would prove stressful

                                            > Our parties might be a little too “mature” for her

                                            > I bit my tongue

                                            > At least for the time being


                                            “How about the two of us go for a walk?”

                                            > She nodded her head and squeezed me tightly


                                            —----------------------


                                            > Muffins and I walked through the abandoned streets of Old Ponyville

                                            > It was what we did when she felt sad

                                            > The streets here are littered with warning signs concerning some sort of gas leak in the area

                                            > Mr. Hooves says not to worry about it

                                            > But it makes me nervous


                                            > Since I moved into Old Ponyville I’ve been getting frequent migraines and dizzy spells

                                            > I asked Muffins if she ever felt weird but she said she didn’t


                                            > Dash and Pinkie says I worry too much

                                            > Worrying too much can be bad for your health

                                            > It can cause

                                            > Ulcers,

                                            > Brain tumors

                                            > Heart attacks

                                            >...


                                            > I think I’m worrying too much again.


                                            > In all honesty, It must just be my body adjusting to the ground

                                            > I’ve read that pure blood Pegasi aren’t supposed to remain grounded for long periods of time

                                            > I haven’t gone back home in a couple of years now and it severely stunted my normal growing


                                            > My legs are long slender tubes connected to a tiny, bean shaped body

                                            > My wings have shrivelled to the size of clothes pins and my head is slightly larger than my body

                                            > Because my legs are so long and thin, walking is a struggle

                                            > I’m always placing one hoof before the other and fumbling around like a klutz

                                            > And like Muffins, I have my own eye problems

                                            > Being too close to Dashes rainboom caused my pupils to burst

                                            > Now I see everything…

                                            > My once wide green eyes are now bulbus black circles consuming three forth of my face

                                            > Muffins says they look like black granite marbles peppered with sprinkles

                                            > I don’t know where she comes up with this stuff

                                            > When I look at myself in the mirror and stare into my eyes I only see large reflective bulbs, a tiny snout, a long snake like neck eyes, and legs more fitting for a giraffe than a mare.

                                            > I can still see, especially in the dark

                                            > But the light causes creates a blinding white effect that consumes my vision like a poorly mixed potion or a sour mushroom


                                            >

                                            > “Where should we go?”

                                            “Oh…I don’t know…You can pick..”

                                            > Muffins had the entire town to herself

                                            > I’m sure most fillies would love to have a place like this


                                            > I don’t know what happened to all the residence in Old Ponyville but wherever they went they sure left in a hurry

                                            > When they left, everything became Muffins property in spirit

                                            > She had a music store with all kinds of instruments

                                            > A tiny book store on the corner of First and Oak

                                            > She even had her own saloon


                                            > It was as an odd situation

                                            > She had an entire town to herself but no pony to share it with

                                            > I don’t know where she would be without me

                                            > At the same time, I don’t know I would be without her


                                            > I never thought I’d ever need another pony in my life

                                            > But I’m happy it’s her.

                                            > I think I'll invite her to the party

                                            > She needs friends and I need some pony to get close to

                                            > I just hope she doesn't catch onto how I feel...