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Sweetie Belle plays GTA

By Guest
Created: 2025-01-26 08:12:08
Expiry: Never
anonsweetie bellecomedy

  1. 1.
    My stupid greentexts from https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/41847236/
  2. 2.
     
  3. 3.
    >you have the only computer in equestria
  4. 4.
    >it still has internet access, thanks discord
  5. 5.
    >this has made you you stick to your old neet habits
  6. 6.
    >there's a wide magical world out there but you can still shitpost on 4chan and play immersive sims, what more do you need?
  7. 7.
    >there's just one itty bitty problem
  8. 8.
    >"Anooon!"
  9. 9.
    >you let sweetie belle use your computer one time
  10. 10.
    >one fucking time
  11. 11.
    >and now she comes over every day after school to try and play gta online
  12. 12.
    >you can hear her hooves scraping against your door as she whines outside
  13. 13.
    >"I just wanna finish my heist! I'll be such a good filly, I won't buy any cars this time! I promise!"
  14. 14.
    >she's gonna buy more cars
  15. 15.
    >she even figured out how to buy shark cards, the little shit
  16. 16.
    >"Anooon... I just really like spending time with you, it's... i-it's really fun..."
  17. 17.
    >you can hear her sniffling
  18. 18.
    >motherfucker
  19. 19.
    >you're going to regret this
  20. 20.
     
  21. 21.
    >you plug the gamepad into the front of your tower
  22. 22.
    >sweetie belle's already standing on your chair, practically bouncing with excitement
  23. 23.
    >you set the controller down just in front of her and get the game started, joining a private session
  24. 24.
    >her horn sparks and flickers with just enough magic to let her move the sticks and press the buttons
  25. 25.
    >you suspect that's part of the appeal for her, even her limited telekinesis skills work for this
  26. 26.
    >she's a smart filly
  27. 27.
    >smart enough to press down on the d-pad and see that there's no player list
  28. 28.
    >"Hey! I wanna play with everypony else!"
  29. 29.
    >she huffs and puffs up at you for a moment
  30. 30.
    >and then she remembers what actually gets you give in
  31. 31.
    >that puppydog expression, she's pleading
  32. 32.
    >"It's a lot more fun when I'm not alone..."
  33. 33.
    >fucker.
  34. 34.
    >you go into the settings and switch her to a public lobby
  35. 35.
    >the moment she's in, she's looking towards the microphone on your desk
  36. 36.
    >"Hi everypony! I hope you're all having fun!"
  37. 37.
    >you can hear half a dozen people telling the squeaker to fuck off
  38. 38.
    >she just giggles
  39. 39.
    >you really, really hope she doesn't start using the vocabulary she's learning from playing this
  40. 40.
    >part of you wants to head off and do something else but hearing regular people calling the filly slurs reminds you that you do have some responsibility here
  41. 41.
    >so... you just watch her play
  42. 42.
    >she's absolutely not good at the game, she can't move both sticks at the same time, but she is playing it regardless
  43. 43.
    >it takes her a little while to get people for the last mission of her heist
  44. 44.
    >mostly because the average person leaves the party the moment they hear her voice
  45. 45.
    >but eventually she has three people who don't give a shit and she can actually go ahead with the heist
  46. 46.
    >one of the other party members takes care of most of it but she's having a blast regardless
  47. 47.
    >even when she's just sitting in the back of an armored car she's praising the driver for his skills
  48. 48.
    >you're pretty sure he's russian and is just grinding out heists for easy money
  49. 49.
    >when the mission's complete she cheers
  50. 50.
    >"Great job everypony! You're the best robbers ever!"
  51. 51.
    >the russian actually says 'you're welcome', the other two are silent
  52. 52.
    >sweetie's just happy that she won
  53. 53.
     
  54. 54.
    >back in the main lobby, sweetie belle goes into one of your garages and examines your car collection
  55. 55.
    >"Your cars are so boring looking, Anon... why don't you make them pretty?"
  56. 56.
    >her idea of pretty is a lot like her older sister's
  57. 57.
    >you really, really don't want her to customize your entire collection
  58. 58.
    >and luckily, you don't have to worry about that this time because she gets distracted
  59. 59.
    >what she gets distracted by is far more concerning
  60. 60.
    >someone just noclipped through the wall into the garage
  61. 61.
    >cheaters are never a good sign
  62. 62.
    >she's just excited to have a friend, of course
  63. 63.
    >"Hi mister! Wanna check out Mr. Anon's cars with me?"
  64. 64.
    >he doesn't
  65. 65.
    >instead, he spawns hundreds of bags of cash and disappears
  66. 66.
    >oh no
  67. 67.
    >you try and warn her but she's not listening, she's spamming the A button to try and sprint faster
  68. 68.
    >she picks all of it up. all of it.
  69. 69.
    >"Thank you so so much mister! I won't have to buy Shark Cards and make Mr. Anon mad at me now!"
  70. 70.
    >you already know what's going to happen
  71. 71.
    >she gets booted out of the lobby and the popup informs the both of you that she's been banned from grand theft auto online
  72. 72.
    >you look down at her, she's just confused
  73. 73.
    >"Did something happen?"
  74. 74.
    >you have to try and explain it to her
  75. 75.
    >by the time she understands what's happened, she's crying
  76. 76.
    >"B-but... but... why would he do something that would get me in trouble!? I... I didn't..."
  77. 77.
    >you're really not great with kids
  78. 78.
    >a few minutes of consoling later, you agree that you're going to try and get discord to make you an xbox because hackers aren't on xbox
  79. 79.
    >why didn't you make sure she played peggle or something?
  80. 80.
    >you could've prevented all of this
  81. 81.
     
  82. 82.
     
  83. 83.
    bonus:
  84. 84.
    >you've spent the past hour terrorizing some little brat
  85. 85.
    >you've sent endless mountain lions after her, she's had a 5-star wanted level the whole time, her apartment is unusable
  86. 86.
    >she's clearly having no fun
  87. 87.
    >"T-that does it! I'm writing a letter to the princess about this!"
  88. 88.
    >lmao she has an imaginary friend
  89. 89.
    >the next day you get on your pc and find you have no internet connection
  90. 90.
    >you go and check your modem
  91. 91.
    >there's no cable in the wall
  92. 92.
    >it's just gone, the wall looks like there was never one in the first place
  93. 93.
    >you go outside
  94. 94.
    >there's not even a cable going into your house anymore
  95. 95.
    >what the fuck just happened
  96. 96.
     
  97. 97.
    bonus 2:
  98. 98.
    >you've let sweebs play on your pc again
  99. 99.
    >you walk into your bedroom and she waves at you, though she doesn't look away from the screen
  100. 100.
    >she's clearly entranced
  101. 101.
    Hey Sweetie. What's the game?
  102. 102.
    >you walk on over and get a clear view of the screen
  103. 103.
    >teenage cadance is sucking a nondescript human's dick
  104. 104.
    >oh no no no no no
  105. 105.
    >"Anon... is this real? Cadance didn't do that, did she?"
  106. 106.
    NO. It's... it's like, uh. A joke? Yeah. It's a joke.
  107. 107.
    >she tilts her head a little
  108. 108.
    >"...Huh. I don't get it."
  109. 109.
    Haha yeah I don't either! So weird! Anyways, you wanna play something else?
  110. 110.
    >you go to grab the mouse
  111. 111.
    >she pulls it towards herself and holds it protectively
  112. 112.
    ...Sweetie Belle.
  113. 113.
    >"I wanna see the other animations."
  114. 114.
    >fuck, you're getting a talking to from twiggles after this one
  115. 115.
     
  116. 116.
    bonus 3:
  117. 117.
    >Scootaloo's standing on her hinds, wings buzzing wildly to try and help her stay stable.
  118. 118.
    >Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle are to either side of her, trying to keep her from tipping over.
  119. 119.
    >The Wiimote's clamped between her front hooves.
  120. 120.
    >She can't really swing but she can at least move it around.
  121. 121.
    >Tennis is going surprisingly decently, she's managing some back-and-forth.
  122. 122.
    >Eventually she tries to lean far to the right in order to catch the ball and causes the three of them to tip over.
  123. 123.
    >Immediately, they're all looking at her flank.
  124. 124.
    >"...Nope, not a tennis pro!" She doesn't sound surprised.
  125. 125.
    >Sweetie Belle's less convinced. "You need the outfit! We looked at the pros on Anon's computer and they all have cool tennis outfits!"
  126. 126.
    >They spend the next few minutes arguing about how to get their cutie marks from playing a video game.
  127. 127.
     
  128. 128.
    bonus 4 (gta 4 edition):
  129. 129.
    >you made a cup telephone so you two can talk 'over the phone'
  130. 130.
    >she's been practicing the accent for days now, even at school
  131. 131.
    >the worker at the bowling alley is very confused by why she's saying the same lines over and over
  132. 132.
    >both of you mostly roll gutterballs but it doesn't matter
  133. 133.
    >when you're all done, she leads you over to sweet apple acres to drink cider
  134. 134.
    >she's trying to imitate euphoria drunk physics on the way back home
  135. 135.
    >eventually, her antics go a little too far and she scrapes her knee
  136. 136.
    >those eyes stare up at you
  137. 137.
    >she's pleading again
  138. 138.
    >god damn it
  139. 139.
    >you carry her back to the boutique while she continues to pretend to ragdoll, limbs flailing lazily this way and that

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