How to clean a pony plush



                                            (Note: steps only guaranteed to work with 100% polyester ponies.)


                                            1) The first step is to run your pony over with a vacuum cleaner. Make sure to get the hose out, and run it along its body to pick up any loose dirt and grime.


                                            2) Then, get a soft-bristled cleaning brush and dip it in some warm, soapy water, then hit the pony with the brush until it submits.


                                            3) Once it is cowering before you, and all the obvious stains have been removed, you can get a damp cloth and rub the pony to cool it down after it gets all hot and bothered from the brushies, and also to remove soap residue.


                                            4) Now, you can crucify, pin up, or hang your poner and leave them up to dry. Be sure to use as little liquid or water as possible as to not make them too wet. They're sensitive, and you won't be able to see their tears if they are too wet, as the tears blend in with the water.


                                            5) Then, once dry, turn on the vacuum cleaner again and approach them menacingly. Ignore their pleas, and screams, you are their owner and you know what is best for them. Mercilessly attack them with the vacuum cleaner hose to suck up any extra dirt or residue, as well as residual moisture, and to floof out the fur. This is the real reason the poner will protest being vacuumed, they know it will make them floofy.


                                            6) Now, you may take down the pony and resume normal activities. (Cuddling, playing, petting, etc.)


                                            Happy ponying!