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Anon x Scootaloo

By SpeedBoostBlaziken
Created: 18th December 2020 07:13:31 AM

  1. >Be Tripfag
  2. >No wait, it's Anon
  3. >Be Anon
  4. >Be in Africa
  5. >Wait no, it's Equestria
  6. >Wait, didn't Equestria turn out to be in Africa?
  7. >Well, this is MLP Equestria
  8. >And you're Anon
  9. >You're Anon in Equestria
  10. >Copyright and Trademark 2011-2014 /mlp/
  11. >Boy you sure do miss /mlp/
  12. >You'd never thought the stories were true
  13. >You still didn't know how many were true and how many were made up
  14. >You weren't concerned about that though, because you had your own story in progress
  15. >Anyway, you've just gotten off of work, and are tired
  16. >Being that you can manipulate many objects with magic-like precision, yet have full human strength, you've been working as a general handyman contractor
  17. >Most of your work involves fixing the town hall roof
  18. >As you detour to ponyville park, you see your one of your favorite mares, Derpy Hooves
  19. >Poor girl is clueless as to how you feel about her, but seems to like you enough
  20. >You've tried going on a few dates before, but it hasn't seemed to really work out
  21. >Mostly because she ends up sidetracking on nearly every conversation or activity
  22. >It makes it impossible to have any romance
  23. >You sigh, and wave to her
  24. >"Hello, Anon!" she shouts in her bubbly voice
  25. >Hehe, bubbly
  26. >Because of her butt drawing
  27. "Hi"
  28. >You respond, seeing that she seems busy
  29. >Probably has to go break the town hall roof
  30. "How's it going gray horse?"
  31. >"Anon, you know I'm not a- oh whatever, I know you're joking anyway."
  32. "True. Nice day isn't it"
  33. >"Yeah it is."
  34. >She looks around and spies the time on the clock tower, which startles her a bit.
  35. >"Well, I should go now. I'd love to stay and chat, but I gotta go babysit Dinky again."
  36. >Babysit
  37. >Dinky
  38. >Headcannon ruined
  39. >Derpy isn't a MILF
  40. >You pop a squat on the park bench, no longer able to stand
  41. >As you sit there, momentarily shattered, you see three small creatures headed your way
  42. >The CMC loved to get piggy back rides and play with you
  43. >AJ and Rarity were hesitant to let Apple Cute and Cutie Belle go near you when you first arrived, but RD and Cutealoo were eager to see what you were made of.
  44. >Curiously, you weren't the first Anon in Equestria.
  45. >But you were the first one in THIS Equestria.
  46. >Turns out the multiverse theory was correct, and sometimes different Anons will get sent to different Equestrias.
  47. >Rarely two or more will be sent to the same one
  48. >You only know this because of your adventures with the Discords
  49. >You sigh, wondering what grand schemes the three mini horses had in store for you
  50. >They nearly got you arrested for BnE once
  51. >Sweetie had convinced you that Rarity said you could take some golden thread from the boutique, but Rarara had accidentally left the door locked
  52. >Suddenly Scootaloo turned to the other crusaders and spoke, jostling you out of your thought space
  53. >"Hey guys, do you, uh, mind if I hang out with Anon today?"
  54. >She says with a slight red tinge in her face
  55. >"Alone?"
  56. >You, Apple, and Belle all looked at her with the same puzzled look
  57. >"Ah guess so. Ah hafta help Sis with some chores anyway. She'll be mighty mad if'n ah don't git em done"
  58. >"And I'm going to Princess Twilight's castle for extra magic lessons. we're starting intermediate levitation!"
  59. >"Great. I'll see you later after dinner, right?" Scooterpony asked them
  60. >"Yeah" they replied in unison
  61. >You turned to her
  62. "So, uh, what is it that you wanted to do?"
  63. >"Well, I was hoping we could hang out together, you know, maybe, uh, get a bite to eat orsomethinglikethat"
  64. >You notice she's blushing as she says this
  65. >"And maybe you could tell me about where you come from"
  66. >For a second there you thought she was asking you ou-
  67. >No, that's silly
  68. >She's just a filly
  69. "Why couldn't the other crusaders join?"
  70. >"Oh well, uh, you know, Applebloom would just question everything you say and Sweetie would keep barraging you with questions. This way I can actually hear what life for you back home is like"
  71. >Fair enough
  72. >Suddenly, you both hear an audible growl
  73. "That lunch offer sounds good right about now. Where should we go? Just name a place and I'll pay for it"
  74. >"Oh, uh, I know just the place. It's nearby, and cheap."
  75. "Perfect. Hop on"
  76. >Taking her cue, she leaps up on to your shoulders, using her wings to assist her jump height
  77. >She's firmly in place, and you head off in the direction she tells you
  78.  
  79. >You're Scootaloo
  80. >Pegasus, Filly, Daredevil
  81. >Ever since this guy came to your world, you've adored him
  82. >He's not like anypone around, and in more ways than one
  83. >He's cool, funny, and he loves to play pranks
  84. >The fact that he's twice as tall as a pony and four times as strong, means new possibilities
  85. >Now, the moment of truth has passed
  86. >You've successfully asked him out on a date
  87. >Or at least you think you have
  88. >You're not sure if he really sees you that way
  89. >After all, you've already learned from him that ponies in his world are non-sapient
  90. >That means non-talking in pony terms
  91. >Plus the way ages work where he's from, he might see you as being too young to be his fillyfriend
  92. >But you'll convince him
  93. >As you make your way to the restaurant, ponies eye you suspiciously
  94. >Are they judging you for having a boyfriend so young?
  95. >You weren't exactly a baby, but you were a little on the young side to be dating already
  96. >Not by much though, it wasn't unheard of for fillies your age to at least go on dates with other colts
  97. >So why are they all so judgmental, as if this was some crazy sight playing out?
  98. >Oh wait, you're riding a 6 foot tall ape-minotaur-beast
  99. >Right
  100. >The ponies in town had started to get used to him a little
  101. >It still might make them nervous to have him carrying you through town
  102. >Especially after the incident where he decided to let everyone know his people are natural omnivores
  103. >He had assured everyone however that they usually don't eat equines if there's another option available
  104. >It took a while for everypony to begin to trust him at all
  105. >As you reflect on all of this, you soon arrive at an Itailian-style restaurant famous for their sandwiches
  106. >It wasn't dirt cheap fast food fare, but it wasn't high-end and expensive either
  107. >Perfect example of a happy median
  108. "We're here"
  109. >You hop down off anon's shoulders and prance inside, too proud of yourself for words
  110. >Anon follows you, and the two of your head inside to begin your "date"
  111.  
  112. >Be anomymous (id:axqb5ym9)
  113. >You've arrived at an Itailian-style family restaurant
  114. >You're not sure whether you can afford it, but Scoots said it was "cheap"
  115. >She might be secretly rich and have a different idea of "cheap" though
  116. >Yeah, that's doubtful
  117. >You make your way inside and see the menu
  118. >Based on prices here, you worked out that 1 bit was about equal to 1 quarter back in 'Murrica
  119. >Kinda hard to figure with some things being crazy expensive or dirt cheap compared to back home
  120. >Single cherries: $0.50-0.75
  121. >Anyway, the sandwiches all had prices ranging from 15-20 bits, plus a deal for an 8-inch sub with potato chips and a drink for 24 bits
  122. >$6 for a meal like that wasn't a half-bad deal if the food was good
  123. >You were about to find out
  124.  
  125. >You and orange small were seated with your food, nomming away and chatting about home
  126. >Some of the things made scoots seem quite scared
  127. >You decided to recount some of the faith-restoring HFY stuff you remember
  128. >Charity, people laying down their lives for their friends, things like that
  129. >People were giving you odd looks
  130. >Standard
  131. >But these looks were different
  132. >They were similar to the looks you'd get when you took your friend's daughter places while he worked
  133. >Those looks that can only come from brainless white knights waiting for their chance to be famous for catching a predator
  134. >As bad as the 30's, 40's, 50's, and so on were from what you heard, what with all the racism and sexism and everything, there was one thing about them that you wish hadn't gone away
  135. >A man could spend time with a little girl who isn't his own without get labelled with the "P" word
  136. >One guy actually had the nerve to call the cops on you
  137. >Good thing your friend worked for the DA or you'd be off to the slammer
  138. >He managed to get both cops who arrested you on the spot fired
  139. >You even started religiously playing the lottery every day since you were acquitted
  140. >But that didn't last long
  141. >He also helped you sue the would-be whistleblower for everything he had for libel and falsely reporting you for a crime
  142. >Hence why you drive a Camaro and live comfortably despite being unemployed for almost a year
  143. >No need to play the lotto now, you've already lucked out enough for one lifetime
  144. >Of course that money wouldn't do you much good here in equestria
  145. >That is, if you weren't on your way from the gold broker to the bank with a secret briefcase of gold bullion
  146. >You heard gold was a good investment, and the fact that you had it with you when you went to Equestria was a God-send
  147. >But none of that spared you the trauma that made you wary of ever being near a kid again
  148. >Which reminded you
  149.  
  150.  
  151. "Say, scootaloo, I've told you a lot about the situation with grown ups and children back home right?"
  152. >"Yeah, so?"
  153. "The looks these ponies are giving me are similar to those I got when I hung out with my friends daughter. Need I be worried about being arrested?"
  154. >"Wha- no way dude, I mean it's not like we're doing anything, it's just food, right? Ehehehe..."
  155. "Right, it's just that people back home were often times too quick to search for an ulterior motive"
  156. >"I mean besides, even if we were on a date, I told you, I'm of legal age anyway, so you could do whatever you wanted with me"
  157. >Your drink stops in your straw halfway up as you completely freeze up
  158. >You sit there, absolutely speechless, and very uncomfortable with the sudden advancement
  159. >Scootaloo at first seems to not think anything of it
  160. >Once she looks at you, she can tell something was up with what she's just said, but couldn't figure out what
  161. >"What, what did I-"
  162. >Finally it hit her
  163. >Fully realizing what she just said, she begins to look like she spray painted her face pink
  164. >She starts playing with her mane and fires off words, trying to cover up for the mistake
  165. >"Uh, I mean, theoretically it'd be legal I'm not saying you and I would no I just mean a filly my age and a stallion or any other talking creature for that matter like you just as an example could I mean yeah that's how the law works here so you have nothing to worry about yeah"
  166. >It seemed by the embarrassment and the fact that it took her a minute to catch what she said that it was a genuine mistake
  167. >She really did just slip up and make an unfortunate implication on accident
  168. >Right?
  169. >She looks away and begins sucking hard on her drink straw
  170. >You realize how you just phrased that in your head and feel like hitting yourself
  171. >But you remembered what that bully in elementary school told you about hitting yourself and decided to take his advice
  172. "So, uh, anyway, I'm full now, so I better get going"
  173. >You were actually still quite hungry, but needed an excuse to get out of here without hurting her feelings"
  174. >"Okay, uh, I guess I'll see you around sometime"
  175. >You realized that hanging out with her was actually pretty enjoyable
  176. >She was a lot like your goddaughter: brash, tomboyish, and always talking without thinking
  177. >Often times to her own embarrassment
  178. >You decided that if she really enjoyed spending time with you like this, you;d just have to man up, get over your insecurities, and make her happy
  179. "Sure thing. Oh and uh, if you ever want to hang out alone like this again, y'know wihout the distraction of AB and Sweetie, you can come to my house and we can plan another, um, thing, like this"
  180. >Rudolph the reindeer's nose didn't have shit on Scootaloo's eyes after you said that
  181. >"Really, does this mean you'll be my coltfriend. Uh, man-friend?"
  182. "Boyfriend"
  183. >You correct her without thinking
  184. >"Right, 'boyfriend', gotcha"
  185. >You realize what you'd just said and it only makes it worse
  186. "Wait wait no, no. Hold on, no"
  187. >And just like that her previously lit eyes appear to have been hid with a full-blown blackout
  188. "Uh, I mean, let's just take it slow, alright. We can talk about it later, but for right now, let's keep it casual, 'kay?"
  189. >You say, pointing and winking at her with your worst Fonzie impression, as if you were a cool dude not wanting to settle into anything serious
  190. >"Right, gotcha. I guess I'll head home now"
  191. >It hurt you to see the filly so hurt and embarrassed, but you had no choice
  192. >There was no way you could ever have a kid as a girlfriend
  193. >No matter how intelligent and mature may seem
  194. >No matter that she was of age according to her society
  195. >No matter how cute she was
  196.  
  197. >You'd think about it
  198.  
  199. >
  200. >
  201. >
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