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Blue Beetle Anon

By Spiderbloke2099
Created: 2021-07-16 21:31:33
Updated: 2023-12-11 14:43:24
Expiry: Never
sunset shimmerequestria girlscapeshitspidershim

  1. >You are Anon.
  2. >Average student.
  3. >Weeaboo
  4. >Below average grandson.
  5. >At least that's what your Grandma’s boy toy says.
  6. >Why your Grandma dates men a quarter her age you will never know
  7. >right now though you are late to class
  8. >if only you had not wasted last night playing waifu-bait 5.
  9. >just as you reach your first period classroom
  10. >BRRRIIIINNNG
  11. >and now you’ve completely missed first period.
  12.  
  13. >Be Sunset Shimmer
  14. >Be counting the seconds till first period ends
  15. >Just under one minute to go
  16. >Right as the bell rings that one awkward kid, what was his name again, adam, andrew, whatever, opens the door.
  17. >You can see a look of defeat slowly take over his face
  18. >”Well, late again mister Incognito. I’ll see you after school,”says Mrs. Harshwhinny.
  19. >You grab your bag and leave for english.
  20.  
  21. >Be Anon
  22. >christ, today can suck a fat dick.
  23. >first you were late to history, then you almost set a table on fire
  24. >IN GEOMETRY
  25. >but now you have a reprieve from your shit day
  26. >now you have lunch, savior of students everywhere
  27. >you make your way through the crowded cafeteria towards your friends, Norman, your straight edge childhood friend, and Flash Sentry
  28. >Flash isn’t quite your friend but Norman’s his lead bassist
  29. >”So, heard you showed up late for Harshwhinny’s class. This makes what, two, three times this year?” states Norman
  30. “yeah, grandma's gonna kill me.” you moan pathetically
  31. >”At least you didn't get in trouble with Mr. Turner,” stated Flash in between bites of his sandwich “I mean how did you even get that table to ignite?”
  32. >you turn to Flash
  33. “You heard Mr. Turner, it was some spill that was left over from his last class.”
  34. >Why the school had Mr. Turner teaching Chemistry and Geometry in the same room you never understood
  35. >the rest of lunch passes in silence as Flash is pulled away by his latest squeeze
  36.  
  37.  
  38. >Be Anon
  39. >for the second time today be late
  40. >Mrs. Harshwhinny had you clean her chalkboard on top of taking notes for the lesson you missed
  41. >all 45 minutes of it
  42. >now you have 20 minutes to make it from school to your grandma's house two and a half miles away, before she decides to break out the sandal
  43. >lucky for you a bus just pulled into the stop
  44. >you board and pay the fair
  45. >for once the universe throws you a bone
  46. >then you remember the closest bus stop to your grandma's house is still a 15 minute walk from her house
  47. >[hopelessness intensifies]
  48. >maybe because the driver senses you're despair, or maybe the dude is incompetent, you don’t care which, he blows through three red lights
  49.  
  50. >17 minutes later you find yourself at your grandma's
  51. >you steel yourself for the beating of a lifetime
  52. >having finally gathered the testicular fortitude for the coming belting you cross the threshold into hell
  53. >you await the shrieking of your undoubtedly pissed off granny
  54. >you stand alone in silence for five minutes as you wait
  55. >at this point you realise that grandma Anon is not home
  56. >you sigh in relief as you make your way up to your room
  57.  
  58.  
  59. >Be Sunset Shimmer.
  60. >Or as you are known by the broader public, the sensational Spider-Woman, agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., honorary Avenger, and hip-tacular web-slinger.
  61. >For the last two weeks you have been staking out the hideout of one Wilson Fisk, aka the Kingpin, well as much as your high school schedule will allow.
  62. >Every night for the the past two weeks, you have been watching an empty warehouse.
  63. >Tonight however your patience finally pays off.
  64. >Several of Fisk’s goons are loading crates of weapons and other contraband into at least three non-descript white vans, most likely to move them to buyers all over the city.
  65. >You grab a camera from your backpack, and web it to a nearby lamppost.
  66. >Girl’s got to make money somehow.
  67.  
  68. >Be Anon.
  69. >You are thankful that your Grandmother was at yoga when you got home.
  70. >Now that she’s returned and you’ve had dinner, you decide to binge-watch Guyver.
  71. >The 2005 one not the 1980’s OVA.
  72.  
  73. >Be Sunset Shimmer.
  74. >After beating the Kingpin’s thugs and webbing them to various parts of the loading dock you grab your camera and backpack and swing off.
  75. >Such is your life ever since you ran away from equestria, almost turned the high school you were hiding at into an army of mind controlled zombies, were defeated, and subsequently bitten by a radioactive spider.
  76. >Your life is fucking weird.
  77. >At least working with S.H.I.E.L.D. has kept the cops off your back.
  78. >well back to the apartment of solitude for a post patrol snack and some well deserved rest.
  79.  
  80.  
  81. >You are Anon.
  82. >You are approximately 10% human and 75% caffeine.
  83. >God you are tired.
  84. >Watching the entirety of Guyver last night might just have been a mistake.
  85. >Well at least you have several boring classes that you can use to catch up on your sleep.
  86. >Walking Into Mrs. Harshwhinny’s room you find it empty, save your friend Norman.
  87. >”Well you are certainly early Anon.”
  88. >Was that sarcasm, you could never tell when you were this far gone.
  89. >You look at the wall.
  90. >You realise that the clock is on the other wall and swing your head around.
  91. >6:30
  92. >...
  93. >Well, you guess you should find your seat.
  94. >Before you can voice even try to start a conversation, Norman beats you to it.
  95. >”Did you get into your grandma’s stash or something?”
  96. “No, just watched Guyver again.”
  97. >”... You didn’t get any sleep last night did you.” Your friend deadpans.
  98. “Why do you ask?”
  99. >”Because you don’t stop watching an anime until you have finished the entire series. Ever.”
  100. >You shiver, remembering the time you watched Dragonball.
  101. >Never again.
  102.  
  103.  
  104. >You are still tired.
  105. >So you are Anon.
  106. >It is now 8:00 and you are not in class.
  107. >You, Norman, and the rest of the class are crammed on a bus on it’s way to The Manehattan Museum of History.
  108. >As you blearily stare at the swirls of red and gold, a voice call out to you.
  109. >The subdued voice of Norman drifts to your ears from miles away.
  110. >”Dude, just try to get some sleep on the way.”
  111. >He seems to be in a better state of mind then you, so you follow his advice and fall asleep within seconds of getting comfortable.
  112.  
  113. >You are Twilight Sparkle.
  114. >You are trying to ignore the fact that Flash Sentry, Canterlot high’s local Casanova, once again tried to get into your pants.
  115. >You wish that he would just leave you alone, after all the girl that he’s really pining for is the princess of a magical kingdom in some other universe.
  116. >And you just so happen to look like her.
  117. >Why is your life so weird?
  118. >At least you aren't going to have to deal with him today.
  119. >No, today is going to be all about history.
  120. >Today you are going with the rest of Mrs. Harshwhinny’s class to the Manehattan Museum of History.
  121. >With the Museum displaying several Mesoamerican artifacts on loan from the Sociedad Histórica de Méxicolt, Mrs. Harshwhinny decided it was high time to get her class out of the classroom and into a more interesting environment.
  122. >Well as interesting as an inner-city museum could be.
  123.  
  124. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  125. >You are anxious about this field trip, after all, the last time you were with a class on a field trip you were bitten by a radioactive spider.
  126. >Maybe you are being paranoid.
  127. >After all, how often do super powered people pop up?
  128. >Okay, wrong question.
  129. >Still, when has anyone gained superpowers from a museum?
  130.  
  131. >You are Anon.
  132. >After a 45 minute power nap, you feel a little better, but not by much.
  133. >As the bus nears the museum Mrs. Harshwhinny stands up.
  134. >”Just because we are not in class does not mean that you have the day off. I expect you to have at least one and a half pages of notes each on at least three different exhibits by the end of the day.”
  135. >Well at least you don’t have to worry about setting another table on fire.
  136. >Right?
  137.  
  138.  
  139. >You are Norman.
  140. >Anons friend and the best bassist this side of Manehatten if you do say so yourself.
  141. >Though you feel more like a babysitter than a friend right now, what with trying to keep Anon from looking like he just smoked Snoop Dogg’s lifetime supply of weed in one sitting.
  142. >Still, you find it somewhat endearing that even in a state that should be causing severe paranoia Anon trusts you explicitly.
  143. >Reaching into your bag you remove an energy drink.
  144. “Anon I think it would be good for you to drink this.”
  145. >You say as you hand him the drink.
  146. >Anon takes it and slams it back, finishing the contents in one go.
  147. >At least Mrs. Harshwhinny hasn’t noticed, yet.
  148.  
  149. >You are Anon.
  150. >And right now you are trying to focus on the displays long enough to write a coherent sentence.
  151. >You honestly could not care less about the old stone tablets, or any of the religious artifacts on display.
  152. >No all you want to do right now is sleep.
  153. >But alas you have to take notes on what some archaeologist thought might have been used as a part of some ritual, or what might have been some ceremonial garb.
  154. >The jade rings that they have on display is cool though.
  155. >Could you really bullshit your way through a page and a half on any of these things though?
  156. >You think not, but fuck it may as well try.
  157.  
  158.  
  159. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  160. >And right now you are trying ignore the nagging feeling at the back of your mind.
  161. >It almost feels like…
  162. >OH SHIT!
  163. >Just as you turn to start running, three burly, and heavily armed men enter the room.
  164. >The gorilla-esque “man” in the center steps forward leveling a large machine gun at your classmates.
  165. >”Alright kiddies, if you want to make it out of here alive you need to do exactly as I say, alright?”
  166. >No one says anything as the man grins ear to ear.
  167. >”Good. Now up against the wall and if I see a hand so much as twitch in a way I don’t like me and my buddies here start shootin’.”
  168. >once again there is silence.
  169. >Smiling even wider, the man reaches for the radio strapped to his belt.
  170. >”We’ve secured the main exhibit hall sir.”
  171. >a quite familiar voice crackled from the radio, though you can’t seem to place where you know it from.
  172. >”Very good, I assume you have some hostages?”
  173. >The ape of a man eagerly replies.
  174. >”Yes sir.”
  175. >”How many?”
  176. >”About 20 all together.”
  177. >”Are they in the room with you?”
  178. >”Yes sir.”
  179. >”Then leave the room.”
  180. >The voice from the radio seems exasperated.
  181. >The Sasquatch impersonator gestures to the other lackeys, then leaves the room.
  182. >With only the two left you start looking for a way to disappear so you can do what you do best.
  183.  
  184. >You are Anon.
  185. >And to your sleep deprived brain, those two guys don’t look so tough.
  186. >Not that you are exactly the peak of human physicality.
  187. >Still Grandpa Anon taught you a thing or two about fighting.
  188. >Summoning all the courage you can muster, you bolt towards the nearest thug and punch him as hard as you can in the face.
  189. >You hear the crunch of his nose breaking.
  190.  
  191. >You are Twilight Sparkle.
  192. >And you just witnessed one of your classmates break one of the thugs nose.
  193. >That the thug is just standing there is a testament to his strength.
  194. >Or he’s a masochist.
  195. >As you are debating whether it’s the man's strength, or his fetish keeping him standing, the thug places his hand on the kid's shoulder.
  196. >”You know kid, it takes some brass balls to do what you just did.”
  197. >The man slams his fist into the kid’s stomach.
  198. >”Unfortunately for your friends, that punch just cost them their lives. But first I’m gonna’ break something of your’s.”
  199. >The thug lifts the kid by his shirt, and swings him like a baseball bat.
  200. >As the other thug turns to watch the display, you hear Sunset whisper in your ear.
  201. >”I’m going to go get some help.”
  202. >Before you can explain the dangers of running off in a situation like this, Sunset is gone.
  203.  
  204. >You are an improvised cudgel.
  205. >So you must be Anon.
  206. >As you are being swung towards one of the displays, your thoughts return to your previous assumption that you could take on two armed and ape-like thugs.
  207. >Turns out what you thought could have been blubber was in fact muscle.
  208. >Right as you reach this conclusion, your back reaches the glass of a display case.
  209.  
  210.  
  211. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  212. >Well with the mask and hood you’re wearing you could be anyone.
  213. >Just as you enter the room where the rest of your classmates are, you watch as one is thrown through a display and carries the cobalt beetle housed within along for the ride.
  214. >Well now seems like as good a time to join as any.
  215. >You send a ball of at each of the thugs, knocking the rifles from their hands.
  216. >”Shit it’s Spider-Woman!”
  217. “Really? Where!”
  218. >You look about fainting ignorance.
  219. >The thug that had left takes this moment to re-enter the room.
  220. >As soon as he leaves the doorway you web his legs together, sending him crashing to the floor.
  221. >With a bellow that would not sound out of place on a moose, the thug nearest you charges.
  222. >You flip over his back, landing a kick square in his buddy’s already broken nose.
  223. >The pain plus your momentum carries him to the floor.
  224. >About a foot from the floor you push off his face and twist midair facing the last thug.
  225. >The man reaches over and grabs one of your classmates, unholsters a pistol, and places it against his temple.
  226. >”Make one more move and I’ll scatter this kids head all over the room.”
  227. >Even with your heightened reflexes, you wouldn't be able to pull the gun from the man's hand.
  228. >You need to find a way to get him to aim the gun somewhere else.
  229. “I'll do what you say, just let the kid go.”
  230. >For a split second the thug relaxes his grip on the pistol.
  231. >And a split second’s all you need.
  232.  
  233.  
  234. >You are Anon.
  235. >And why do your head, shoulders, and spine hurt so much
  236. >What. Weren't you doing something?
  237. >You remember going to a museum with your class, then several armed men rounding you and your classmates up.
  238. >Groggily you try to sit up only to find yourself pushed back down.
  239. >”Put him back under!”
  240. >As you attempt to fight back, your lungs begin to fill with some form of sedative, and you hear one of the nurses muttering.
  241. >”It’s a shame about that tattoo though.”
  242. >Your last thought before you drift back into unconsciousness is, when did you get a tattoo?
  243.  
  244.  
  245.  
  246. >You are Anon.
  247. >You have just been released from Manehatten General Hospital after only two weeks of recovery.
  248. >The doctors have said that your quick recovery is nothing short of a miracle.
  249. >Most people with the kind of injury you were brought in with are ever able to move again let alone leave the hospital under their own power.
  250. >At school, however, you have become something of a hero.
  251. >One without any brains, but a hero none the less.
  252. >Right now though you wish you were anyone else.
  253. >What with your Grandma having found out about the mysterious tattoo on your back.
  254. >The unending pain in your head.
  255. >And best of all because you honestly don't know how the hell you got the damned thing, you have been grounded.
  256. >Well at least until you can think of some lie convincing enough to get Grandma off your back.
  257.  
  258. >You are Twilight.
  259. >And it’s Sunday afternoon, which means you are currently browsing /sup/, while waiting for your grandfather to arrive.
  260. >It has become somewhat of a family tradition.
  261. >Mom makes lunch, Shiny and Cadance come up from Brooklyn, and Dad and Grandpa Pym take half the day to drive from one end of Manehatten to the other.
  262. >You know, normal family stuff.
  263. >Well as normal as any family with two Genius Physicists, A world renown writer, the youngest Detective in Brooklyn, and one of the smartest young women on earth if you do say so yourself.
  264. >Just as you find an interesting thread, you hear the front door close.
  265. >Well time for lunch you guess.
  266.  
  267. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  268. >Well right now you are Spider-Woman but that’s beside the point.
  269. >You are on patrol until your mentor is finished with some kind of family obligation.
  270. >Not that you’re complaining, it gives you some quality time with the city.
  271. >Still, sometimes you wonder if Director Fury was just trying to make some kind of joke when he assigned you to be mentored by Antman.
  272. >At least he gives you a bit of space to do your own patrolling.
  273. >You really want to know why Fury insisted on forcing you to have a mentor, after all you were a crime fighter long before you joined S.H.I.E.L.D.
  274. >Probably best not to question the director of the best spy agency in the world aloud though.
  275.  
  276. >You are Anon.
  277. >And right now you are dreaming.
  278. >After all the only time you would be able to fly is when you are dreaming, right?
  279. >Also the headache you’ve had for well over a fortnight has stopped, and the only time that happens is when you're sleeping.
  280. >Looking down you see what looks like a mugging.
  281. >You should go stop it.
  282. }Or better yet, let the meat deal with it’s own problems.
  283. >That seems somewhat cruel, even for a dream
  284. }If it’s a dream then you won't have to worry about the meat and there problems.
  285. }After all they will cease to exist when you awaken
  286. >Well you have always wanted to be a hero.
  287. }Then you should find something more heroic to do than help ONE individual.
  288. >Something's wrong.
  289. >Your head's starting to hurt, that doesn't happen when you are asleep.
  290. }The mind is a powerful thing.
  291. “SHUT UP!”
  292. >You are Anon.
  293. >You are not dreaming.
  294. >And someone else is controlling your body.
  295.  
  296. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  297. >Right now you are working on your homework as you wait for your mentor in the lobby of the Pym Tech tower.
  298. >CHS was buzzing with gossip today as Anon, the kid who was beaten by the thugs you helped catch as they tried to rob a museum , was missing for the entire day.
  299. >The theories ranged from him simply sleeping in, to him being kidnapped by some shady organization bent on world domination.
  300. >Of course, you think he was just getting a checkup.
  301. >After all, most anyone that had their back used to break a display case would probably need some serious medical help.
  302. >You shake your head as you grab the last bit of homework you need to complete.
  303. >Just as you finish with the last equations of your Trigonometry homework, the tall navy blue haired form of Orion Sparkle, your mentor, sets his briefcase down beside you.
  304. >”Sorry about making you wait, Ms. Shimmer.”
  305. “It’s fine, gave me time to make some headway on this.”
  306. >You lightly slap your book bag, creating a muffled wooden thunk.
  307. >Smiling he gestures towards the front doors.
  308. >”Well, ready to get started?”
  309. >You stand eager to begin your patrol.
  310.  
  311. >You are Norman.
  312. >And right now you are in uptown, on your way to a gig.
  313. >Flash Drive are playing at some hipster nightclub by Pym Tower this evening.
  314. >Now if only you could convince Flash to change the name of the band you'd be set.
  315. “Well speak of the devil.”
  316. >As you near the shop, you can see Flash’s beat up old minivan parked in front with Brawly and Ringo hauling the drum kit, and Flash talking with the owner.
  317. >As much as several people at the school would like to say otherwise, Flash is a fairly good guy.
  318. >He just has some confused feelings towards the newest member of the CHS student body.
  319. >It definitely doesn't help that she looks almost exactly like the dimension hopping pastel pony princess that he fell hard for.
  320. >It’ at that moment when you feel a buzzing in your pocket.
  321. >Pulling out your phone you check to see who's calling you.
  322. >Shit, It’s your father.
  323. “Hey Dad. What's up?”
  324. >”Yes, hello Norman. I'm just calling to say I'll be having a late business meeting, and won't be home until sometime after midnight.”
  325. >This is the fifth time this month that he’s had a business meeting, if that's even what he's doing.
  326. “Sure, hope it goes well.”
  327. >”I'll see you tomorrow morning then. Stay safe.”
  328. >Before you can say so much as “you too”, your father hangs up.
  329.  
  330. >You are Anon.
  331. >And for the last who-knows-how-long you have been a passenger in your own body.
  332. >The only thing preventing you from thinking that this might still be a dream is the skull splitting headache.
  333. >The thing that’s been in control, however, has been eerily silent.
  334. >It’s almost like it’s taking a great amount of concentration to control you.
  335. >Wait, if it's having a hard time controlling you, that might just mean you have a chance to regain control of your body.
  336.  
  337.  
  338. >You are Annabelle Nemus Incognito.
  339. >And right now your little shit of a grandson is missing.
  340. >Not that you aren't worried about him, but after he was almost killed by some shady thugs trying to rob a museum, finding out about the tattoo carved into his back, and now missing an entire day of school to go galavanting around town doing who knows what.
  341. >Well it just makes your blood boil.
  342. >Not to mention what it does to your heart.
  343. >At least Steve has been helpful in this trying time.
  344. >Well as much as any lover-boy can.
  345. >After a few minutes of thinking, well more like watching your young, spry lover lifting weights, you have an epiphany.
  346. >Standing up you walk over to the nearest phone, and call Anon’s closest and oldest friend.
  347.  
  348. >You know this area, you are in uptown about four blocks from Pym tower
  349. }’And from here you will watch as your planet begins to burn.’
  350. ‘So you can speak.’
  351. }’Yes, and do not think that I do not know about your little plan.’
  352. >Well there goes that idea. Wait.
  353. ‘Why can’t I speak!?’
  354. }’You will speak when I have further use of your voice.’
  355. }’For now though, enjoy the view.’
  356.  
  357. >You are Norman.
  358. >And for the second time tonight you are getting off the phone with someone's legal guardian.
  359. >Luckily for you this time it's not your father calling to tell you how he is going to be caught up with some paramour, er “business meeting”.
  360. >No, this time you just got off the phone with Anon’s grandma.
  361. >Turns out he’s been gone for about ten or so hours.
  362. >Not quite long enough to need the cops, but still enough time for her to start to worry a little.
  363. >While you feel the need to leave to start searching for your friend, you still made a commitment to finish at least one set, and your mother didn’t raise you to turn your back on your commitments.
  364. >Still Anon might not be the best person in the world, but he's never done something like this before.
  365. >Your mind made-up you lean over towards Flash.
  366. “Hey Flash, I'm gonna take off at the end of this set.”
  367. >The only acknowledgement you get is a slight nod as Flash sets down a water bottle and grabs the mic.
  368.  
  369. >You are Luna Artimus Faust
  370. >Vice Principal of Canterlot high school.
  371. >Although it’s getting hard to remember who you are.
  372. >Not your name, you could never forget that monstrosity no matter how long you live.
  373. >What's getting hard to remember is who you were before you became a vigilante.
  374. >A small part of you feels that on some level what you are doing is wrong.
  375. >With four people hospitalized due to your actions, not even counting those who have died.
  376. >True all were muggers, rapists and even a few low ranking members of the mob, but still that small part of you feels that there has to be a better way of doing this.
  377. >However the you feels that those shits are getting off far to easily.
  378. >As you continue walking back to the rather spacious apartment that you and your sister share, you feel the ring on your right hand pulse.
  379. “So, more vile scum wishes to beset me? So be it.”
  380.  
  381. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  382. >Right now you are swinging home.
  383. >For the first time since you left equestria you are content with your life.
  384. >Even with the occasional homicidal maniac trying to kill you from time to time or the super-powered nut jobs committing crimes for the most absurd of reasons, you wouldn't change a thing.
  385. >On the whole, for you anyway, life is pretty good.
  386.  
  387. >You are Luna.
  388. >And for the first time you feel as if you have a real challenge before you.
  389. >What you thought might have been a simple thug or at most an enforcer for the mob, is in fact some form of android.
  390. >An android barreling at you at just under mach 1.
  391. > It seems prudent to suit up at this time.
  392. >Hopefully a quarter charge will see you through this fight.
  393.  
  394. >You are Anon.
  395. >And as detached as you are from your body at the moment, you can still feel the pain from your hands being crushed, torn,and stretched into scythes.
  396. >A pain so intense that you are completely unable to focus on what is going on around you.
  397. >That is until a monstrous yellow spider sends you flying into a nearby car.
  398. >Now you can see clearly.
  399. >Think clearly.
  400. >You can't even feel the pain anymore.
  401. >Your adrenaline fueled revelation is cut short by yourself being forced to stand.
  402. >Now that pain is gone, you notice a woman who looks strangely like Vice Principal Luna wearing a yellow and black jumpsuit is standing over you.
  403. >”Curious, most people would be screaming with horror by now.”
  404. >She even sounds like the Vice Principal.
  405. }”My Masters have no need for a weapon that feels fear.”
  406. >Either the principals have a third sister that neither have mentioned, or your Vice Principal is moonlighting as a superhero.
  407. >Or a super powered criminal.
  408. >Whichever it is you have a feeling that this fight won't end favorably for either one of you.
  409. >”Then your masters are fools.”
  410. >She swings a glowing yellow fist at you only for you to dodge out of the way at the last second, slashing at her over-extended arm and impacting the air a good half inch from her flesh.
  411. >You can feel your face contort into a sneer
  412. }”So the meat has a power ring.”
  413. }”Not that it matters, your planet is doomed no matter what parlor tricks you can do.”
  414. >Your arm swings forward.
  415. >The Luna look-alike dodges, kicking you in the back.”
  416. >That seems to loosen the grip of whatever is controlling you.
  417. “GET OUT OF MY HEAD!”
  418. >Your vision clears for just a moment.
  419. >The woman seems taken aback.
  420. >”Mister Incognito?”
  421. >Before you can start to explain what is happening to you, your vision is overtaken by a yellow tint.
  422. >You desperately try to speak, but your body will not listen.
  423. >Instead all you hear is a tinny inhuman screech as you lunge forward.
  424. >You try your hardest to miss the doppelganger of your Vice Principal, but you're still unable to make your body do what you want.
  425. >Luck seems to be on your side, however, as she twists out of your reach just in time.
  426. >Only to summon several yellow bats, and direct them to attack.
  427. >Your left hand convulses and splits open.
  428. >Your knuckles dislocating.
  429. >You almost blackout from the pain.
  430. >Then the center of your hand to starts burning.
  431. }”You are quite the crafty one.”
  432. >The burning lessens as a ball of blue-green fire escapes from the tattered remains of your hand.
  433. >The bats attempt to intercept it, but it is moving too fast.
  434. >The Luna look-a-like dodges to the left but not quite fast enough.
  435. > The ball catches her left ankle as it passes.
  436. >The look of shock on her face is quickly replaced by one of pain.
  437. >She points her fist at her leg and a beam of yellow light wraps around her ankle.
  438. >Then she turns to you.
  439. >”You seem to be stronger than your average low-life.”
  440. >Her voice is filled with pain.
  441. }”And you fight well, for meat.”
  442. >Your right hand is raised high.
  443. >Just as it drops it down, a fluorescent yellow beam encompasses your vision.
  444.  
  445. >You are Sunset Shimmer, the Spider-Woman.
  446. >And right now you are swinging back to the ‘Shimmer Cave’.
  447. >The name’s a work in progress.
  448. >just as you round the last corner before you start the home stretch, a brilliant yellow light draws your attention to a street the opposite direction from your block.
  449. “What is it that Ant Man always says, ‘Crime runs on collage levels of sleep and caffeine’?”
  450. >Backflipping mid swing, you change direction, and shoot a web towards the nearest building.
  451. >At least you have an excuse to put off that history paper.
  452.  
  453. “Absolutely not!”
  454. >You are Orion Sparkle.
  455. >Astronomer, Particle Physicist, and Super Hero.
  456. >If only S.H.I.E.L.D. would let you put the last part on your Business cards.
  457. >But right now is not the time to weigh the pros and cons of making your second favorite hobby public knowledge.
  458. >No, right now you need to explain to the Sorcerer Supreme of Earth and several members of the Avengers exactly why your teenage daughter becoming Doctor Strange’s apprentice is a bad idea.
  459. >”At least consider it Ant Man…”
  460. “No! I refuse to have her just drop everything and go galavanting off to Christ-knows-where with you at the drop of a hat!”
  461. >”He never said that your daughter would be following him every time he goes to fight demons and the like, just that she should be allowed to explore her powers in a safe and controlled environment.”
  462. >You want to punch Stark right in his perfect face.
  463. >But you know that he is right, Twilight needs to learn to harness and control the magic running through her system before anything happens.
  464. >Doesn’t change your opinion on decking Stark though.
  465. “Fine, I’ll talk with her about it. But I will not force her if she chooses not to.”
  466. >Dr. Strange smiles.
  467. >”That’s all I ask.”
  468.  
  469. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  470. >Right now you are investigating a flash of yellow light.
  471. >The street that you thought you saw the flash come from was empty, though you can’t really blame anyone for not wanting to go out of their homes right now.
  472. >After all, half the block is trashed.
  473. >Destroyed cars, melted street lamps, inch-and-a-half-deep gouges in the sidewalk.
  474. “Looks like someone had a good time.”
  475. >Another bright yellow flash, this time from an alley two and a half blocks down.
  476. >You’re there in seconds, just enough time to see a blue armored man blasted in the back by what looks like Vice Principal Luna in a yellow and black cat-suit.
  477. “Not that I don’t appreciate a little pinch and poke every now and again, but shouldn’t you keep that to the bedroom?”
  478. >You shoot several web balls at her.
  479. >She dodges them, summons a massive yellow bell jar, and slams it over you.
  480. >”Stay put.”
  481.  
  482. >With Spider-Woman out of the picture for now, you can focus your attention on the blue menace.
  483. ’And not a moment too soon,’
  484. >You block yet another savage strike.
  485. }”It does not matter how long you fight, you are meat, and even the strongest of meat will tire eventually.”
  486. >The creature brings the cannon that has replaced its left hand level with your gut.
  487. >You can feel the heat as it generates more plasma.
  488. >If you are hit with a plasma bolt directly it will all be over.
  489. >With all the strength you can muster, you slam the toe of your boot into the bottom of its jaw.
  490. >The force of the kick launches the humanoid monster into the air.
  491. >One second passes.
  492. >Then two, as it just hangs in the air, smirking.
  493. >You encase yourself in the light of fear, and raise into the air yourself.
  494.  
  495. >You can feel your breath hitch in your throat.
  496. >What you first thought was some kind of magically summoned container, now seems to be a portal to your own personal hell.
  497. >You watch helplessly as a younger, more foolish you storms out of Celestia’s throne room.
  498. >You feel the pain of transforming into a raging demon.
  499. >You feel your wings and tail being torn from your back.
  500. >The power of the Elements of Harmony forcing you to feel the pain, misery, and fear you caused the students of Canterlot High.
  501. >You watch your friends fail to stop the Dazzlings, as they engulf the world in unending strife.
  502. >Twilight tears the multiverse apart to gain as much magical power as she can, only to finally be wiped from existence.
  503. >You scream in anguish, slamming your fists as hard as you can into the bell jar.
  504.  
  505. >You are Anon.
  506. >You don’t know what’s worse, that you might just be killed, or that you might just be forced to watch as the whole world is destroyed by your own hands.
  507. >At least the thing controlling you is a decent fighter.
  508. >Another car slams into you.
  509. >If you could control your face you would grimace in pain.
  510. >Okay, maybe it could be a little worse.
  511. >Once again your left hand convulses.
  512. >Heat builds.
  513. >Bright yellow light surrounds you.
  514. >The ball of searing heat rockets from the shattered remains of your hand.
  515. >A wall collides with your back.
  516. >The Doppelgänger tries to dodge, but isn’t quite fast enough.
  517. >Plasma burns bright on the shield she just barely summons in time.
  518. }”You’re on your last legs meat, just give in.”
  519. >You feel exhausted.
  520. >”Only once you are dead.”
  521. >The sound of shattering glass and an inhuman cry, one so primal and full of desolation, splits the air in two.
  522.  
  523. >You are Annabelle Nemus Incognito.
  524. >And standing in your doorway is a dead man.
  525. >Anon’s father, the man who seduced and impregnated your only child, then had the gall to not only let her die, but now it seems to have faked his own death to shirk his responsibilities as a father.
  526. >“Now I know what you must be thinking, luv. ‘Why is the rat bastard who stole my lovely daughter from me, and left my grandson an orphan, standing in my front garden?'”
  527. “Actually, what I’m thinking is how far of a head start should I give you, John, before I call the cops.”
  528. >John takes a step back.
  529. >”Never thought we were on a first name basis, Anny.”
  530. “Well you and my idiot daughter did elope.”
  531. >”At least you haven’t lost your /winning/ personality.”
  532. “Bite me John.”
  533. >”Sorry, luv, but you’re just a wee bit older than /most/ of the birds I’ve been with.”
  534. >And with that your patience has officially worn thin.
  535. “You have thirty seconds John.”
  536. >”Right. Just wanted to thank you for looking after my son while I was gone, so now that I’m back if you could just fetch the lad I’ll be on my way.”
  537. >Christ, you can feel the aneurysm already starting.
  538. “You fucking arrogant drunken moronic con-man, you don’t just get too walk out for /eleven/ years and then come back like you never even left!”
  539. >He stares at you like the slack-jawed moron he is.
  540. >”E-eleven?!”
  541. “More drunk than usual I take it?”
  542. >Why he seems taken aback you honestly don’t care.
  543. “Now get the hell off my property, you drunk whore-monger.
  544. >You take quite a bit of satisfaction in slamming the door in his face.
  545.  
  546. >You have just received the best news you could ever hope for!
  547. >So you must be Twilight Sparkle.
  548. >Doctor Strange, /the/ Sorcerer Supreme of Earth has just extended the offer to train you to be a Sorceress yourself!
  549. >But more importantly you have been accepted to M.I.T.
  550. >With a full ride scholarship to boot!
  551. >You’ll have to wait until the semester after next as enrollment has ended, but the ability to enter this prestigious institution is in and of itself an exciting proposition!
  552. >With your higher education being footed by the state, your spot in one of the most prestigious Universities on earth guaranteed, and the offer of tutelage by one of the most magically knowledgeable individuals on earth, possibly in the universe, you feel like you could sing your heart out.
  553. >You don’t because that would be quite silly, but you feel that the phrase describes your feelings quite well.
  554. >Now if only Cadence would hurry up, Shining and her wedding isn’t going to plan itself!
  555.  
  556. >You have just received the the worst news you could hear.
  557. >Not only did the spell that was supposed to return you to this dimension, plane, realm, multiverse, whatever you call it, and fail for three buggering years /straight/.
  558. >Not only did you lose the second woman you ever loved.
  559. >Not only have you found out that your son was left without a father for ELEVEN FUCKING YEARS.
  560. >You are now finding that the Gods of magic are holding out on you.
  561. >Even the simple scrying spell you are using to find your only child is going haywire, switching between pointing towards Middle Manehattan, and Astoria.
  562. “What more do you want from me you cunts.”
  563. >You untie the cigarette from the string.
  564. >All magic has a price,this much you have always known.
  565. >You thought at first yours was being shunted of to a different dimension, plane, realm, multiverse, or whatever, for eternity.
  566. >But this shit is almost unbearable.
  567. >A rather pretty young woman with clearly dyed hair crosses the street as she sees you stalking towards her.
  568. >At least you get a nice view.
  569. >No, focus on finding your son, getting laid can wait.
  570. >Christ knows your son has.
  571.  
  572. >With your construct bell jar broken, you will need to finish this fight quickly.
  573. [Charge at 2.3%]
  574. > Definitely need to finish this fight quickly.
  575. >Spider-Woman still seems to be recovering from the effects of the ring.
  576. >It is a pity that your hand was forced, but if she had only not interfered…
  577. >You dodge a slash to the abdomen and recover in just enough time to spin away from a plasma bolt.
  578. >You need only the right opportunity and the fight will be over instantly.
  579. >Another slash.
  580. >This one has far too much force behind it.
  581. >Perfect.
  582. >The cyborg lunges past you as you dodge, bringing up your ring.
  583. >You blast it with a full percent of your ring’s power.
  584. >The beam sends it flying three or four feet, the scarab shaped protrusion smoking slightly.
  585. [Contact Incoming, bearing 0 6 4 5 by 2 3 0 7]
  586. >Your ring does not have the power for another fight.
  587. >With as much speed and grace as you can muster, you take to the skies, just barely able to make it far enough away that you can double back once you are sure you aren’t being followed.
  588. >In the end it takes you two hours to find your way home, and by then S.H.I.E.L.D. has taken Spider-Woman and whatever was left of the /thing/ that attacked you.
  589. >All that is left now is to charge your ring.
  590. “In blackest day, in brightest night, beware your fears made into light. Let those who try to stop what's right, burn like my power the Nightmare’s might!”
  591.  
  592. >You wake up in a hospital bed for the second time in as many months.
  593. >Only this time, instead of finding yourself in the hospital with some nurse congratulating you on a successful operation, you find a grizzled irate looking man with an eye-patch staring at you.
  594. >”I’m not gonna mince words, son, just what the hell are you?”
  595. “Wha…”
  596. >You try to rub your forehead with your hand, only to find it strapped to the bed.
  597. >”I’m not going to ask again. What. The /hell/. Are you.”
  598. >It takes you a moment to find the words.
  599. “I.. I-I’m just a human.”
  600. >The man laughs.
  601. >”And you’re going with that? That you are just a normal human, not a Mutant? Not a mystical demon? Not some World War Two era experiment who just got thawed out?”
  602. >You shake your head.
  603. >”You really believe that, don’t you.”
  604. >You nod.
  605. >This causes him to laugh even harder.
  606. >”You know what, kid? I like you. Takes real balls to wake up in an unfamiliar location and lie to the man who’s your only chance to make it out alive.”
  607. >Okay, you are officially starting to panic.
  608. >The man notices, and pulls a chair over by the bed you are strapped to.
  609. >”Some of my officers think you are a security risk, what with how you wrecked an entire block. Not me though. No I think you could have some potential. All you need is someone to help you learn control, maybe give you the occasional push in the right direction.”
  610. >The man stands and takes a minute to unstrap you.
  611. >”So kid what do you say?”
  612. >He holds out his hand.
  613. >You stare at it, thinking.
  614. >"I don’t have all day, kid.”
  615. “Anon.”
  616. >”What?”
  617. >You shake his hand.
  618. “My name is Anon.”
  619. >”Well Anon, welcome to S.H.I.E.L.D.”
  620.  
  621. >The plan is finally coming to fruition.
  622. >After three millennia the True End of this world is approaching, and very soon the pretender will be made low before Him.
  623. >Already the faithful gather.
  624. >In the fortnight since the call went out your numbers have swollen from a mere thirty to close to two hundred, and you feel that in the coming months that number will only grow.
  625. >For now, though, you content yourself with addressing your flock.
  626. “Four more lanterns must be lit before the Warring Twins will be ripe for sacrifice. While the cursed rings make there way to those who will light the way, Our Master has decreed that the time has come to find His champion.”
  627. >It warms your heart to see the exultation in your flock, as they chant His praises.
  628.  
  629.  
  630. >You are Anonymous John Incognito.
  631. >It has been one month since you fought the woman that looked like Luna, and in that time you’ve been learning how to use your “powers”.
  632. >Well more like trying to figure out how the hell they work.
  633. >You managed to activate the armor after about a week and a half of hard work, but the weapons seem to be just outside your grasp.
  634. >One minute you’ll start forming blades on the tips of your fingers, next the armor is gone.
  635. >And without armor on your hands, well, there goes your hands.
  636. >The man Fury assigned you to, one Dr. Sparkle, has said that he thinks it could be some kind of defense mechanism.
  637. >You think the universe hates you too much to just kill you.
  638. >Whatever the case, it hasn’t stopped Fury from at least trying to have you trained and ready for “patrol”.
  639.  
  640. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  641. >Today is Saturday, your favorite day of the week.
  642. >It is also the first day of spring break.
  643. >That’s right, a week of sand, sun, and waves awaits one Sunset Shimmer.
  644. >Unfortunately you aren’t just Sunset Shimmer, you are also the Spectacular Spider-Woman!
  645. >And as much as it would be nice, Crime does not take a week off.
  646. >Especially the super powered ones.
  647. >So unlike most of your friends, joining Rarity at her aunt’s house in Norfolk, Virginia, you get to stay in Manehattan.
  648. >Excluding Applejack, who normally uses spring break to get the farm ready for planting, and Twilight, who is helping plan her future sister-in-law’s wedding, making plans for her move to Boston, and starting the very basics of her magical training.
  649. >Not that you are jealous of Rainbow, Fluttershy, Rarity, and Pinkie or anything.
  650. >Okay, maybe just a little.
  651. >After all, the last time you had some actual down time was before you joined S.H.I.E.L.D.
  652. >Not that you’re complaining, Fury does pay for room and board plus a somewhat generous monthly stipend.
  653. >Though the House Committee on Mutant/Superhuman Affairs would probably claim that is a waste of the Taxpayers’ money.
  654. >Of course according to them Xavier's School for the Gifted Is a waste of Taxpayer money, despite the fact that it is a privately run institution.
  655. >But politics aside, it would be nice to have someone to at least patrol with.
  656.  
  657. >You are Anon.
  658. >”Once more, Beetle. But this time try redirecting the blow as it comes towards you instead of stopping it.”
  659. >Though Ant-Man seems insistent on calling you by the codename Fury gave to you: Blue Beetle.
  660. >The agent that was assigned to spar with you throws another punch at your armored chest.
  661. >Left hand up.
  662. >*SMACK*
  663. >This time you just barely manage to swat the offending fist away in time.
  664. >The agent backs off before you have time to follow up.
  665. >”Very good Blue! Now…”
  666. >However before he can continue with that thought, a girl in her late teens, wearing a red, blue, and black bodysuit that seems to be made of a cross between spandex and kevlar, enters the gym.
  667. >Spider-Woman, the number two spot on your ‘Would Bone if Given the Chance’ list just walked in.
  668. >”Spider-Woman, just the person that I was hoping to see.”
  669. >Ant-Man seems to think that this is as good a place as any to stop the lesson.
  670. >”If you want, feel free to return to your duties, Coulson.”
  671. >The agent simply nods before leaving.
  672. >The girl speaks up, after a moment, in an all to familiar voice.
  673. >”So what’s on the to do list today Doc? More daring heroics?”
  674. >You cannot believe your ears.
  675. >”Nothing so exciting today, I think, Ms. Shimmer. For now I feel like some Introductions are in order.”
  676. >And that confirms it.
  677. >”Anon, I’d like to introduce…”
  678. “Hold the fucking phone! This is some joke right?”
  679. >”I’m sorry, what do you mean?”
  680. “You’re telling me Sunset Shimmer is Spider-Woman!?”
  681. >Sunset takes this moment to speak up.
  682. >”What’s so hard to believe about that!? You think I’m not good enough?”
  683. “NO! I’m just trying to wrap my head around the fact that the sexiest girl in my class is also fucking Spider-Woman!”
  684. >It might not have been best to blurt out the top spot of your ‘Would Bone if Given the Chance’ list, given present company.
  685. >Sunset just stands there.
  686. >Judging you.
  687.  
  688. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  689. >Right now your trademarked mouth is failing you.
  690. >You feel somewhat embarrassed by what was just said.
  691. >Well embarrassed and quite flattered.
  692. >After all it has been quite sometime since someone said that they thought that you were merely cute, not even thinking about sexy.
  693. >Even less often is a similar compliment from a fellow hero, though that may have more to do with relative ages.
  694. >You find your thoughts interrupted by Dr. Sparkle forging ahead.
  695. >”So, I take it you two have met before, ignoring the fight.”
  696. “Yes. We share a few classes.”
  697. >Though you can’t seem to muster the courage to say more than that.
  698. >After Dr. Sparkle lets the two of you simmer in your shared awkwardness for a few moments, he begins a light sparring session between the two of you.
  699. >In his own words to see the “level of Blue Beetle’s skills”.
  700. >Out of pity you hold back, only to be surprised by his grasp of hand-to-hand combat.
  701. >However when you gain any meaningful distance from him, his skill seems to drop off significantly.
  702. “What happened Anon? When we fought that Luna look-a-like your suit had all kinds of medium and long range weapons.”
  703. >You flip over a kick and web his feet to the floor.
  704. >Dr. Sparkle stops the spar at that point.
  705. >”I can’t use them. When you and Nightmare fought, I wasn’t even in control of my body.”
  706. >He seems somewhat sore about that.
  707. >Though you can’t really blame him, after all you were yourself subjected to the worst fever-dreams that your mind could create.
  708. >Wait.
  709. >Did he just say…
  710. “What do you mean you weren’t in control of your body?”
  711.  
  712. >”So, you think it might be some kind of psychic block.”
  713. >You are Doctor Strange.
  714. >And you are in an intense conversation with Colonel Fury.
  715. “Yes. You have already quite thoroughly ruled out some form of mechanical or digital defense. And I cannot sense any magic from either the device or the boy.”
  716. >Your apprentice, Twilight Sparkle, speaks up from behind the two of you.
  717. >”Would /we/ be able to help him?”
  718. > Her concern is one of her most admirable traits in your opinion, second only to her inquisitive mind.
  719. “I have tried, however the device seems somewhat resistant to my magic.”
  720. >This time Fury speaks.
  721. >”I guess that means we go with plan B.”
  722. >Twilight looks to you, whispering conspiratorially.
  723. >”What do you think plan B is?”
  724. >Before you can even shrug, Fury answers her.
  725. >”We call in Xavier.”
  726.  
  727. >You are Anon.
  728. >And after your first training session with Sunset, Ant-Man had you speak with Agent… Coleman? Coulton? Colsman?
  729. >Whatever his name is, it turns out that Fury wants you to talk with some shrink.
  730. >And that is where you find yourself right now, standing in a hallway deep in the Helicarrier.
  731. >According to Agent Calcium, your inability to use the suits weapons could be some kind of mental thing.
  732. >You still think it most likely due to the universe as a whole liking to bend you over the table.
  733. >Either way, you think that this will be a waste of time.
  734. >Well, even if it /is/ a waste of time, what’s the worst that can happen?
  735. >You steel yourself, straighten your posture like Grandpa taught you, and open the door of one of the unused officer’s Quarters.
  736. >The door slides open revealing the room to have been fully converted from the simple quarters that you think even Fury sleeps in, to a full, if somewhat cramped, office.
  737. >The room has what you expect from a psychiatrist's office, several bookshelves mostly filled with textbooks on psychology and other subjects you really couldn’t care less about, a long couch that looks like one that you’ve seen in the drama classroom before, and finally a desk with several sheets of paper and a few nick-knacks strewn across it.
  738. >The man you’re here to see is sitting behind the desk, reading a newspaper.
  739. >You clear your throat.
  740. >”Hmm? Ah yes you must be Anon.”
  741. >The bald geriatric wheels out from behind his desk, and stops in front of you as you continue to stand in the doorway.
  742. >”Please come in and have a seat.”
  743. >You force the armor over your hands to clench, balling your mangled hands into fists, then take a deep breath.
  744. >The anger leaves your body with the breath, yet another thing to thank your grandfather for teaching you.
  745.  
  746. >You are Twilight Sparkle.
  747. >For once you find yourself slightly behind in your school work.
  748. >Not because it is difficult for you, but rather because you might just have a little too much on your plate right now.
  749. >What with planning your brother and former dean’s wedding, your upcoming move to Boston, the final few months of your senior year, your social obligations, and finally the magical training you are receiving from the Sorcerer Supreme himself.
  750. >Even with the intelligence and organizational skills that you have, far beyond what sixteen years of life experience should warrant, you find that your grades are suffering.
  751. >Though Shiny’s indifference to the problem is even more infuriating than the problem itself.
  752. >”Look, Twily, I understand that to you this is a huge problem. But you've only dropped a single percent, and that’s from 100 to 99, not even a grade. You'll be fine. Hell, knowing you, you’ll more than make up for it when finals hit.”
  753. >At that moment Cadence finds it appropriate to stick her head in from the kitchen.
  754. >”Language, dear.”
  755. >Shining shakes his head.
  756. >”Sometimes I swear that woman could hear me cuss from two blocks away.”
  757. >Okay, that gets a chuckle out of you.
  758. >The Sorcerer Supreme sitting across from the two of you however seems to feel a bit out of place.
  759. >”Not to derail the conversation, but you're sure you want me to stay for dinner, because...”
  760. >Whatever he was going to say was lost as your mother enters the room.
  761. >”This wouldn’t be the first time one of Orion’s ‘colleagues’ has stayed for dinner, but if you honestly feel like you are imposing on our hospitality then you can help clear the dishes after dinner. Speaking of, dinner’s ready.”
  762. >And before anyone can speak, she leaves with an air of finality.
  763.  
  764. >You are Anon.
  765. >this first session with Xavier was not quite as bad as you thought.
  766. >No explaining that what you know you know saw never happened, no prescriptions for psych meds, no trying to tell you family members are dead when they are not.
  767. >No, just a conversation about your feelings and who you are as a seventeen-year-old who lost the use of his hands.
  768. >At least Xavier can empathize with being crippled.
  769. >Though throughout the session you felt kinda weird like he was looking through you.
  770. >Like you were somehow transparent.
  771. >It honestly weirds you out a little, but not enough to be a major problem.
  772. >Now to return home and continue to wait for Grandma to come back from her “Spiritual Retreat”.
  773. >If she’s even at some new-age “Crystals and water can heal your cancer if you believe hard enough and have pockets deep enough” bullcrap, and not just bumping uglies with Steve.
  774. >And that was a mental image you definitely did not need.
  775. >You’d much rather be thinking about Sunset’s spectacular spandex-suited body.
  776. >Her long toned legs, with thighs that you believe might just be able to crush a watermelon.
  777. >Those wide hips and apple shaped rear that just begs to rest on your face.
  778. >Her flat, smooth stomach, that just curves inward just enough to accentuate her generous assets.
  779. >That bust, oh the things you would do to those lovely melons.
  780. >And her face, beautiful even when set in the foulest of scowls.
  781. >Goddamn you would destroy her pussy if you had the chance.
  782. >However now that chance seems further away than ever.
  783. >What with how you just about sperged out when you found out that she is Spider-Woman.
  784. >Now she probably wants nothing to do with you.
  785.  
  786. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  787. >After Anon, the Blue Beetle, basically said that he would fuck you silly if given the chance, you felt the need to clear your head.
  788. >And take a long cold shower.
  789. >It’s not that you wouldn't take him up on that offer, he does have a rather nice body, well what you can see with the armor covering most of him.
  790. >Just that the last few boyfriends you’ve had were only there to help increase your popularity, and if you got to have some fun with them from time to time neither of you complained.
  791. >But after you and Flash split up, well you don’t know what people would think.
  792. >Besides, with all the crime fighting you just don’t have the time for a boyfriend right now.
  793. >Plus it would be irresponsible, what if he was killed because of you?
  794. >Well Orion doesn’t seem to mind, though he was married before he donned the mantle of Ant-Man.
  795. >Now that you think about it, Anon /is/ an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. himself.
  796. >He could probably still defend himself, even if he is still fairly green…
  797. >No. You need to focus on school and hero-ing first.
  798.  
  799. >You are Charles Xavier.
  800. >The young man that is coming to you for counseling is a rather interesting case.
  801. >He at first seemed completely uninterested in getting help from you until you began moving away from questions involving his childhood.
  802. >Though that could be an indication of some form of trauma, it would require a greater level of trust on his part before you would feel confident enough to even start helping him work through that.
  803. >But what’s even more troubling is what you found when you scanned his mind.
  804. >No blocks on the powers that Leuten- Colonel Fury claimed he had, psychic or otherwise.
  805. >Just a young man caught up in a world as far removed from his experience as one can be.
  806. >In that sense he is hardly alone.
  807. >In fact, you know quite a few young men and women who are in similar positions to him.
  808. >But now you have a meeting with the good Colonel to attend.
  809.  
  810. >You are Twilight Sparkle.
  811. >And though Doctor Strange was at first hesitant to be eating a meal with your family, he now seems more comfortable with the idea of conversing with your family.
  812. >Even if he’s mostly just listening.
  813. >Your father turns towards you.
  814. >”So, how goes the magic training thing?”
  815. “It’s quite fun, and very challenging.”
  816. >Your father nods, just now getting caught up with the conversation he missed earlier.
  817. >”And it’s not causing you too much trouble in school?”
  818. >It almost seems like he is digging for something.
  819. “Well, I mean, I /have/ dropped a percentage point in math.”
  820. >Your father turns to eye you incredulously.
  821. >The Sorcerer Supreme takes this moment to speak up.
  822. >”I’m sure you’ll still graduate top of your class. I managed to flub one or two classes in medical school and still turned one of the best neurosurgeons in the country.”
  823. >You actually got to see his academic record some years ago, it may have been leaked on /sup/ six and a half months ago.
  824. >What he said was an outright fabrication, but it still makes you feel better.
  825.  
  826. >You are Annabelle Nemus Incognito.
  827. >While you think that the Assembly of the Sleeping God is a crock of shit, Steve is a devout follower.
  828. >Though, with the lack of separate dormitories for men and women, the past week hasn’t been a complete loss.
  829. >Particularly since Steve has been even more… energetic, this week.
  830. >If you actually cared about your dorm-mates you might be a little embarrassed.
  831. >Now that you think about it, you feel just a bit sorry for the help.
  832. >After all, sheets don’t just clean themselves.
  833. >And though you’ve thoroughly enjoyed both your time and the “company” in the Everfree compound, you are beginning to miss your home sorely.
  834. >Even the possibility of seeing the drunken layabout that calls himself your son-in-law is starting to seem less unpleasant every sermon you are forced to attend.
  835. >Steve, however, seems to be less than willing to even entertain the idea of leaving.
  836. >The most recent argument became quite heated, and not in a fun way.
  837. >So it is with a heavy heart, and severely bruised knuckles, that you are now packing your bags.
  838. >”Leaving so soon Sister Annabelle?”
  839. >And now you get to break the “news” to Reverend Glimmer.
  840. “Of course. I was only here because Steve’s a nice piece of ass.”
  841. >The “good” Reverend tut’s and shakes her head.
  842. >”Now Sister Annabelle, we both know that’s only half true.”
  843. >You can’t help but smirk.
  844. “You’re right, Steve’s nice but, like every man, he pales in comparison to my first husband.”
  845. >Just the thought of Hans’ rippling muscles, sharp blue eyes, flowing blond hair, and the dedication he once held…well, it just makes you feel so hot.
  846. >No, you don’t have time to reminisce about the perfect specimen of a man that was your first in oh so many things.
  847. >Glimmer chuckles to herself.
  848. >”You truly are insatiable aren’t you?”
  849. >You can almost see the venom her words contain.
  850. “At least I can go within 100 yards of a school zone.”
  851. >And you are officially done with this shit.
  852. >Before she can get a word in edgewise, you shoulder past her with your bags.
  853. >She calls after you, most likely to attempt to continue the verbal sparring match, but you just can’t muster up a single solitary fuck to give.
  854. >What you can do, however, is flip her the bird as you leave.
  855.  
  856. >You are Starlight Glimmer, Reverend of The Sleeping God, and leader of the Everfree and Manehattan flocks.
  857. >Sister Annabelle may have left the flock, but you take comfort in the fact that soon, like all people, she will see the true path and join the faithful in blessed sleep.
  858. >After a moment of adulation for your Lord’s imminent return, you return to your duties.
  859. >After all, there is much to prepare and little time to do it.
  860. >Staring with finding a new lamb.
  861. >Well, maybe the next one will be more cooperative.
  862.  
  863. >You are Twilight Sparkle.
  864. >And despite the mild awkwardness, in the beginning, dinner with your family is proving to be as enjoyable as always.
  865. >The conversation flowed, over the course of the meal, from your training, schooling, and even for a short time to your friends, to your father’s day at work, and now your mother asks the one question that you have feared.
  866. >”So, Cadence, how’s the wedding planning going?”
  867. >You can almost feel the upcoming wedding crushing you under the weight of everything that still needs to be done.
  868. >Cadence, on the other hand, seems to be a fount of joy compared to your pit of dread.
  869. >”With all the things that Twilight’s done to help with the planning, I don’t think the wedding would be stopped even if the king of Latveria decided to crash it!”
  870. >She and the rest of your family might think it’s a laughing matter, but with the number of super-powered heroes, adventurers, and even the one or two mercenaries that your brother met in his, admittedly short, time in the army, that might just happen!
  871. >Your mentor seems to sense your distress and speaks up.
  872. >”Worst case scenario, I believe that either Wanda or myself could set up a spell or two to prevent that from happening.”
  873. >That, it seems, is just enough to bring a smile to your face and just a bit of laughter to the rest of the table.
  874. >After the moment’s passed, the conversation turns away from the impending wedding, and soon enough the mild scrape of utensils on plates ceases.
  875. >As Doctor Strange begins collecting the dishes, your mother speaks up.
  876. >”you do know that I was joking, right?”
  877. >Your mentor simply smiles and nods, continuing into the kitchen.
  878. >Your father follows him into the kitchen, presumably to help with the rather large pile of dishes.
  879. >For you, however, it’s about time to get back to /sup/.
  880. >After all, the guy who leaked Doctor Strange’s academic record was going to try the same with Captain America, and you’ve always wanted to see what S.H.I.E.L.D. and the F.B.I. would do about a security issue like that.
  881.  
  882.  
  883. >You are John Constantine, Exorcist, and Master of the Dark Arts.
  884. >Well more like petty dabbler.
  885. >At least the new business cards now reflect that little oversight.
  886. >Regardless, you are now the proud owner of “Constantine Paranormal Investigations”.
  887. >Well right now it’s a rundown office building in Lower Manehatten you conned off some bloated septic, er “purchased on the cheap”.
  888. >Still the place is yours, if somewhat in need of repair.
  889. >But now you have a base of operations in this plain, universe, whatever you call it.
  890. >Unfortunately it’s not the Mill-house or the House of Mysteries, but for now, it’s good enough.
  891. >You don’t have time to think about the past, what you need to do is plan.
  892. >’Gurgle’
  893. >First some breakfast then the planning.
  894.  
  895. >It’s been half a month since you started “Constantine P.I.”
  896. >And in that time you have managed to exercise a total of five daemons, three restless spirits, and one talking raccoon.
  897. >Well the raccoon wasn’t possessed, or at least you think it wasn’t possessed.
  898. >Suffice it to say your luck has never been worse.
  899. >Without a world-ending crisis, you can’t seem to find steady work, and without steady work, you are having trouble paying the few utilities you /do/ have.
  900. >But these are probably just growing pains, you need to just keep that stiff upper lip.
  901. >Might also help if you could keep your mind on your work, but right now you can’t keep help but think of your son.
  902. >To think that your kid’s not seen you in ten years, while for you, it’s been only three…
  903. >You need to find him, but the damn scrying spell won’t work properly.
  904. >Unless you have two kids.
  905. >That would be impossible, you might poke at powers beyond mortal comprehension, but at least you never went sharking without protection, and not just the magical kind.
  906. >And furthermore, You didn’t even bang Bethany up ‘till after you eloped, So there is no possible way that you could have two kids.
  907. >The Almighty is probably just having a go at you.
  908. >For the third bloody time in as many years.
  909.  
  910.  
  911. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  912. >For the Third time this week, you and Anon are on patrol together.
  913. >Even with how often the two of you have been on patrol together, Anon can’t seem to get over the fact that he admitted that he has a bit of a crush on you.
  914. >Meanwhile, you just keep debating the pros and cons of getting back into the whole dating thing.
  915. >And this overall awkwardness has definitely not helped in the predicament the two of you now find yourselves.
  916. >”IF YOU THINK YOU CAN BLOCK, THE RHINO WILL SHOW YOU HOW HE ROCKS!”
  917. >Not that this is the first time that you’ve fought Rhino, actually this is, what, time number five, number six?
  918. >However, you aren’t just fighting Rhino.
  919. >”Come on dweebs, we don’t have all day. Just lie down and die already.”
  920. >You just manage to dodge out of the way of a pair of taloned boots.
  921. >So, instead of just tripping up the Rhino and webbing him to a Quinjet like always, you are having to deal with him and Vulture.
  922. >”Sh-, er, Spidey. Heads up!”
  923. >And you dodge just in time, as Blue tosses a manhole cover at Vulture.
  924. >At least he’s quick on his feet.
  925. >The improvised projectile soars past Vulture as she dodges as well.
  926. >This, however, gives you the perfect opening to redirect it at the back of a charging Rhino’s head.
  927. >And with a loud clanging and one slightly bent manhole cover, you only have one villain to face, as Rhino comes to a sliding stop at Anon’s feet.
  928. >You turn, only to find Vulture flying away.
  929. “Blue, stay here until S.H.I.E.L.D. can pick up horn head, I've got a turkey to catch.”
  930. >Before Anon can object, you are swinging off after Vulture.
  931.  
  932. >Ten minutes later finds you swinging back to where you left Anon and Rhino, unfortunately, empty handed.
  933. >At least you two of you managed to capture one of them, and prevent them from whatever it is that they were planning.
  934. >Still would have been nice to punch Vulture in the face.
  935. >There are some questions that need to be answered, though, like why were two of Kingpin’s top lieutenants skulking around Lower Manehatten.
  936. >Still, with at least one in custody, you can rest somewhat easy that whatever their ultimate goal was, S.H.I.E.L.D. will find out.
  937.  
  938.  
  939. >You are Anon.
  940. >As far as Friday afternoons go, yours isn’t quite the one you thought you would be having.
  941. >But super powered criminals aside, it hasn’t been too bad.
  942. >Okay, you’re lying, it’s been fucking miserable.
  943. >Norman’s been distant lately, meaning your only company for the past week or so has been Flash.
  944. >Not that he’s a bad guy, only, he seems less interested in shooting the shit, and more in conspiring to get into Twilight’s pants.
  945. >The guy just doesn’t seem to know when to quit.
  946. >Though to be fair, your lack of blunt honesty might not be helping matters.
  947. >And Twilight just seems to be ignoring him.
  948. >Which in turn seems to be somehow encouraging him even more.
  949. >Maybe he’s been watching too many harem animes?
  950. >Number and types of anime watched aside, Flash has never really been your friend.
  951. >The only reason why you even hang out is because of your mutual friendship with Norman.
  952. >And even that only happened after Flash dumped Sunset back when she was the queen bitch of Canterlot high.
  953. >Queen bitch with a rockin’ body, but queen bitch nonetheless.
  954. >And as your thoughts turn to Sunset Shimmer, your mood improves quite a bit.
  955. >Even before her redemption you had the hots for that bacon haired sex goddess, but now that she’s not just good, but a Goddamn superhero your crush has grown to full on admiration.
  956. >Speaking of Sunset’s moonlighting as a superhero, you have to wonder, do her friends know about it.
  957.  
  958.  
  959.  
  960. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  961. >Over the past few weeks you have been neglecting your friends.
  962. >No matter what villains have been skulking about, no matter who you've been patrolling with, you've skipped out on your friends far too much.
  963. >But tonight that's going to be different, tonight you and the girls are having a sleepover at Sweet Apple Acres.
  964. >And tonight you are going to be there, come Tartarus or high water!
  965.  
  966. >The night has been going well, though Twilight was unable to make it.
  967. >It’s understandable, though, as she has the move to Boston, her brother’s wedding, and her training under the Sorcerer Supreme to worry about.
  968. >Although your friends don’t know that last one yet.
  969. >They only learned about you moonlighting as a superhero after you’d been doing it for several months, and even now they’re still in the dark about you working for S.H.I.E.L.D.
  970. >Although, that particular omission was a direct order from the “good” Colonel.
  971. >Not that you don't understand the need for secrecy, but it has made things a bit difficult for your social life.
  972. >”Sunset, dear, are you alright?”
  973. >Rarity’s staring at you.
  974. “What? Er, yeah, I'm good. What were we talking about?”
  975. >Rainbow rolls her eyes.
  976. >”AJ’d just asked how the whole super-powered-vigilante-thing’s been going, you know, since we haven’t had the time to hang out much this month, ya’ know, outside of school.”
  977. >Applejack leans over to smack Rainbow upside the head.
  978. >”OW! What’d I’d do?”
  979. >This time Applejack rolls her eyes.
  980. >”Y’all ain’t s’posed to be talkin’ ‘bout where any ol’ person can hear that.”
  981. >”Oh, and who here’s not gonna know about Sunset being freaking Spid-!”
  982. >Applejack slaps her hand over Rainbow’s mouth, cutting her off mid sentence and shooting her a glare.
  983. >”Mah family fer one. Don’t ya’ understand anythin’ about secret idenities?”
  984. >”Oh, like your family’d spill the beans.”
  985. >”That ain’t the point, Dash!”
  986. >Rainbow and Applejack are, at this point, standing so close a gentle breeze would put them in a compromising position.
  987. >However, before a fight/makeout session could start, a disconcerted Applebloom bursts into Applejack’s room, causing the two hot-headed girls to turn away from each other.
  988. >”Applejack! One of them Dazzling girls is at the door! She want’s to talk ta’ ya’ll right now!”
  989.  
  990.  
  991. >You are Twilight Sparkle.
  992. >At the moment, you are at the sanctum of Doctor Strange in Greenwich, just starting your thirty-first lesson on magic from Doctor Strange, the Sorcerer Supreme.
  993. >The first twenty were just meditation, and the last ten were getting the feel of directing arcane energy.
  994. >And tonight is the first time you get to practice actual magic.
  995. >But before you get to learning how to cast magic missile, or how to conjure balls of fire or lightning or all the RPG magic, you have to learn about...
  996. “A sling… What’s a sling ring?”
  997. >He chuckles just a little at your question.
  998. >”A sling ring is a mystical device that allows a master of the arcane to cross vast distances almost instantaneously, by opening a dimensional portal.”
  999. >Okay, so maybe you do get to start on something better than RPG magic.
  1000. >Because, honestly, how many people can open a portal to anywhere in the universe.
  1001. >That leaves you with only one question, and the Sorcerer seems to have anticipated it.
  1002. >”To use it you need to focus on where you want to go and direct arcane energy there.”
  1003. >The way he said that is like he finds it to be the easiest thing to do.
  1004. “And how would I do that?”
  1005. >”Hmm? Oh! Right! What you need to do is put the ring on one hand, and trace a circle in the air with the other.”
  1006. >Your mentor then proceeds to demonstrate by opening a portal to Central Park, before allowing it to close.
  1007. >”Now it’s your turn.”
  1008. >He waves Wong, his butler, over.
  1009. >Once Wong has reached you, he gives you a sling ring of your own.
  1010. >”If you are unable to open a portal on your first try, do not fret, the Doctor took several months and being trapped in the Himalayas to finally open one.”
  1011. >Strange casts a glare at Wong that might just have fried a lesser man from existence.
  1012. >His slight grin, however, betrays his scowling visage.
  1013. >”With that tale out of the way, I think it’s time to begin. Ms. Sparkle, whenever you’re ready, start by making a portal behind yourself. When you have that down, we’ll step things up a little. Don’t want you having to deal with trying to make a portal in sub-zero temperatures, yet.”
  1014.  
  1015.  
  1016. >It’s 9:00 PM on a Friday night, and you just so happen to be Anon.
  1017. >You also happen to be on your way to a rave with Flash and the rest of his band, sans Norman.
  1018. >Norman is apparently spending some quality time with his dad.
  1019. >Frank might be a complete hard ass, but he does seem to love Norman.
  1020. >And unlike your father, he didn’t disappear when his kid was only eight years old.
  1021. }It seems that you are quite bitter about that.
  1022. >Was that…
  1023. >No it couldn’t be, that /thing/ hasn’t spoken up since your fight with the Luna Doppelganger.
  1024. >Flash nudges you with his elbow.
  1025. >”Come on dude, cheer up. There’s even some new DJ that Vinyl’s opening up for tonight!”
  1026. >That would be awesome if you actually gave two shits about Techno.
  1027. “Sounds great.”
  1028. >You hope that he can detect the sarcasm.
  1029. >”I know right!”
  1030. >Nope still oblivious.
  1031. >What is it with this man and not understanding sarcasm?
  1032. >Ten minutes later and you are standing awkwardly in the corner.
  1033. >Oh god, you can feel your head pounding from all the noise.
  1034. }Truly you and your fleshy kind are weak if they can be defeated by sonics this underwhelming.
  1035. >Nope.
  1036. >No.
  1037. >Not happening.
  1038. >Not even remotely possible.
  1039. >You refuse to believe it.
  1040. }Believe what you want, meat, it will not change the truth.
  1041. ‘So what happens now, you try to go on another killing spree?’
  1042. }Unfortunately, over 90% of my systems were rendered inert. Including the mind control circuits, which means I am physically incapable of controlling you. It would also seem I am unable to withhold information.
  1043. “YES!”
  1044. >Flash turns to you and removes his hands from the girl in front of him just long enough to give you a thumbs-up.
  1045. >”That’s the spirit Anon!”
  1046. }I believe it would be acceptable to remove that one from the gene pool.
  1047. >’No, it would not.’
  1048. >As your discussion ends so too does Vinyl’s set, and the mute DJ makes a quick exit.
  1049. >The crowd settles just enough for you to hear yourself think.
  1050. }You could hear your own thoughts quite well, otherwise, we could not have had that riveting conversation.
  1051. >Anything else you or the beetle could say is cut off by a deep nasally feminine voice.
  1052. >”Manehatten, ARE YOU READY TO FUCKING RIOT!”
  1053. }Hypnotic waveform detected, engaging combat mode.
  1054. “WHAT?!”
  1055.  
  1056.  
  1057. >You are a rather confused, and somewhat nervous, Sunset Shimmer.
  1058. >Down stairs is one of the Dazzlings, which one you aren’t quite sure, but the fact that one of them has shown up here cannot be a good sign.
  1059. >Rarity seems to be thinking along the same lines.
  1060. >”Why would one of those Dazzling ruffians come here?”
  1061. >Applejack sighs, shaking her head.
  1062. >”An’ more ta’ tha point, how in tarnation did they know where we would be?”
  1063. >Rainbow Snarls.
  1064. >”Like that even matters. We kicked their asses at the battle of the bands. We can do it again.”
  1065. “Last time all of us had some kind of magic.”
  1066. >Not that you don’t think that the six of you could take one of them, it’s just that since you’ve joined S.H.I.E.L.D. you’ve learned the value of not underestimating possible opponents.
  1067. >That was the first lesson that Ant-man taught you.
  1068. >You rub your shoulder almost unconsciously.
  1069. “Either way, we should see what’s going on.”
  1070. >The others nod, albeit looking more nervous than you.
  1071. >As the six of you reach the living room you find an irate Granny Smith, in only her dressing gown, serving some warm cider to a girl with orange hair dressed in a black hoodie emblazoned with the symbol of [spoiler]Hydra[/spoiler].
  1072. >You lock eyes with the lead Siren, glaring death.
  1073. “What do you want Adagio?”
  1074. >Adagio smiles imperiously.
  1075. >”Not to interrupt the harmless lesbian experimentation, or whatever it is that you do at these sleepovers, but I don’t have the time to wait for you Rainbrat’s to finish...”
  1076. >AJ steps forward, cutting Adagio off mid-sentence.
  1077. >”Y’all can cut the crap. Just tell us why we shouldn’t just blast ya’ ta hell an’ back.”
  1078. >Adagio’s smile turns downright predatory.
  1079. >”Touched a nerve there? Well, I do guess it would be /very/ rude of me to keep you waiting.”
  1080. >Adagio stands up, her cup of cider untouched on the side table.
  1081. >”To make a long story short, I need your help breaking Sonata out of a Hydra research lab in Cambridge.”
  1082.  
  1083.  
  1084. >You are Anon.
  1085. >”HEY MANEHATTEN, SQUASH THAT BUG!”
  1086. >You are also fighting for your life against an army of drugged up rave-zombies.
  1087. }If you would allow the use of lethal force I’m sure we could finish off the rest of the meat far quicker.
  1088. ‘Absolutely not!’
  1089. >On top of /that/ you have to deal with a blood crazed robot beetle symbiote thing.
  1090. >And you thought that tonight sucked before.
  1091. >Even with the suit’s audio filters, you can still hear the annoying attempt at dance music.
  1092. >Why does anyone think that this DJ is any good?
  1093. >Your right arm is wrenched behind your back.
  1094. >Oh, right, hypnosis.
  1095. >That would do it.
  1096. >Flash grabs your head, trying to pry the suit off.
  1097. >”Just listen! This song’ll blow your fuckin’ mind, dude.”
  1098. “Oh, fuck off Flash. I’d rather be deaf than li…”
  1099. >Deaf.
  1100. >That might just do it.
  1101. ‘Hey, bug-suit.’
  1102. }What is it meat, have you reconsidered using lethal force?
  1103. >Three zombified ravers crowd around you, trying to tear the armor off.
  1104. ‘No, do you have any external speakers or something?’
  1105. }I do have a sonic blaster if that is what you require.
  1106. >The DJ smirks out at the growing crowd trying their damnedest to crack the suit open like a crab-shell.
  1107. >”THAT’S RIGHT, MINIONS, LET HIM FEEL THE MUSIC.”
  1108. >If this works, you might just have a chance.
  1109. ‘Could you use it to cancel out the hypnotic sound waves?’
  1110. }I could, but why should I?
  1111. >You can almost feel the press of the bodies surrounding you.
  1112. >It’s now or never.
  1113. ‘Do you want to die?’
  1114. }Fair point. If you die, finding another host will be quite difficult in my current state.
  1115. >Your left hand splits open from the center of the palm.
  1116. ‘Funny, it hurts less than it did last time.’
  1117. >Well it hurt less until the blasts leave the confines of your hand.
  1118. >But despite the excruciating pain, the scarab does as promised.
  1119. >The DJ runs from the stage just as the club goers start to regain their bearings.
  1120. >Though, in her haste to leave, the hood of her jacket falls back, revealing two long, green and purple pigtails.
  1121.  
  1122.  
  1123. >You are John Constantine.
  1124. >Although your business hasn’t quite been booming, you’ve still made enough money to get some minor repairs done on the building and get back some of the less expensive occult items that your departed wife’s mother sold after you were torn out of this plane.
  1125. >At least you haven’t been charged with faking your own death.
  1126. >Yet.
  1127. >For the most part, though, you’ve been flying under the radar.
  1128. >Hell most of your old contacts in this world’s occult underground don’t even know you’re back.
  1129. >The only exception is a sleazy little beast called Tharge the Hoarder.
  1130. >The imp’s only pleasure in life seems to be collecting occult artifacts that could hypothetically be traded for souls, or other occult artifacts.
  1131. >He also Just so happened to owe you a few favors.
  1132. >Hence the return of several of your more interesting occult items, most important among them, your trenchcoat.
  1133. >The trenchcoat that you left two of the three most important things in your life.
  1134. >Half a bottle of Johnnie Walker, and a pack of Silk Cuts.
  1135. >The only place in Manehatten that sold the one brand of ciggies that you smoke was replaced with a trendy little coffee shop a year ago, apparently.
  1136. >And that was because the whole damn neighborhood was rezoned, hell the dive that you frequented was replaced by a fuckin’ club.
  1137. >But that’s what happens when you are out of the universe for a decade.
  1138. >Still, at least you have some backup shops in Long Island.
  1139. >It’ll just be a bit more expensive.
  1140. >Maybe you could find a place that would deliver?
  1141. >Or you could go Cold Turkey again?
  1142. >You did it once when Anon was born.
  1143. >Sure it was hell, but you would do it again for his sake.
  1144. >Right?
  1145. >If he still even loves you.
  1146. >You look at the bottle in your hand.
  1147. >Well, if this is the last pack, better make the most of it.
  1148.  
  1149.  
  1150.  
  1151. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  1152. >In front of you is Adagio Dazzle, the leader of “The Dazzlings”.
  1153. >And in spite of the mutual hatred between your friends and them, Adagio is asking for your help rescuing her sister from Hydra, of all groups.
  1154. >Definitely a trap.
  1155. “So, Adagio, why the hell should we trust you, let alone help you?”
  1156. >Dash points an accusatory finger at Adagio.
  1157. >”YEAH! How stupid do you think we are!? Everyone knows Hydra was destroyed in World War Two!”
  1158. >Dash crosses her arms over her chest, smiling triumphantly.
  1159. >You feel the need to facepalm.
  1160. “Dash, you do know that over half of Hydra’s top scientists and officers disappeared in 1945, right?”
  1161. >Dash smirks at you.
  1162. >”Well duh! That’s because Captain America took care of ‘em.”
  1163. >Stars above, it’s like talking to a wall.
  1164. >Adagio, on the other hand, seems to be finding some amusement in your squabble.
  1165. >”Well, as much fun as watching you fight like a married couple is, trust me, coming to /you/ for help is the last thing that I want to do. So if we can just get this over with…”
  1166. “Look, Adagio, even if we did believe you, do you really think that the six of us could take on Hydra?”
  1167. >Adagio smiles like a cat that just caught a fat canary .
  1168. >”No, but from what I procured on my way out of the facility, you do have some ‘friends’ that could help~.”
  1169. “W-what do you mean?”
  1170. >There’s no way that she could know about you working for S.H.I.E.L.D.
  1171. >The eldest siren glares at you.
  1172. >”Okay, let me spell it out for you. If you don’t help me break Sonata out, I’ll make sure that dear old Granny Smith here doesn’t see 70.”
  1173. >AJ bolts forward, lifting Adagio up by the front of her hoodie.
  1174. >”An’ how in damnation are ya’ gonna do that.”
  1175. >Adagio merely smirks, before letting out a near deafening shriek blasting Applejack into the wall.
  1176. >”Sunset, meet me at Kendall Square on May 27th at 11 pm."
  1177. >Adagio brushes past you as if nothing just happened.
  1178. >"Oh, and if you think about trying to turn me into S.H.I.E.L.D., or anyone else for that matter, I’ll make sure it’s the last thing that you do.”
  1179. >With that, Adagio disappears into the night.
  1180.  
  1181. >An hour later, you and the girls are still going over what Adagio said.
  1182. >”I can’t believe that ruffian! Thinking that she needs to extort us to help her! The nerve!”
  1183. >Pinkie giggles.
  1184. >”And she thinks we have friends in S.H.I.E.L.D.! That’s just silly!”
  1185. >The fact that the other girls don’t press the matter just proves how well you’ve managed to deceive them, and it tears you apart to do so.
  1186. >But orders are orders, and you have to be the good soldier.
  1187. >Fluttershy looks over to you.
  1188. >”S-sunset, i-is something wrong?”
  1189. >Fuck, Think of something fast.
  1190. “It’s just, what if Adagio is right? What if there really is some kind of Hydra base in Cambridge? What if the other sirens are there?”
  1191. >Rainbow scoffs.
  1192. >”Serves ‘em right for what they did.”
  1193. >That seems wrong, the girls helped reform you, so why couldn’t they do the same with the sirens?
  1194. >Fluttershy seems to be thinking along the same lines.
  1195. >”But Rainbow, they could be in trouble! Even if they were cruel, no one deserves to have the kinds of things that Hydra would do to them!”
  1196. >Rainbow throws up her hands in defeat.
  1197. >”Fine, but I still think that Adagio’s lying.”
  1198. “Regardless, I think that I need to do this.”
  1199. >The five other girls each start shouting out reasons as to why this is a bad idea, or otherwise trying to dissuade you from helping Adagio.
  1200. >The cacophony that they make causes you to feel sick, probably an after-effect of whatever power Adagio has obtained.
  1201. “Girls, GIRLS! Thank you. Look, I understand, it probably is a trap, but even if there’s a slight chance that Adagio’s telling the truth I have to go.”
  1202. >Rainbow and AJ give you dubious looks.
  1203. “I’m not quite sure I could live with knowing that I could have saved someone and chose not to.”
  1204. >With that admission the girls settle down a little bit.
  1205. >Now all you have to do is figure out how to make it from Manehatten to Boston in eight hours.
  1206. >At least the 28th isn’t a school day.
  1207.  
  1208.  
  1209.  
  1210. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  1211. >Today is Thursday the 26th, and for the past week you’ve been working out a list of capes, agents and various S.H.I.E.L.D. hangers on that you know, would be willing to help you, And most importantly, could be trusted to keep what you are doing and who you are doing it for a secret.
  1212. >Thus far you think Anon and Twilight could be trusted.
  1213. >Anyone else you could think of would most likely try to capture the sirens, and as much as you think that S.H.I.E.L.D. and Colonel Fury have the best intentions, you wouldn’t trust Fury’s XO as far as you could throw the Helicarrier.
  1214. >Either way, it’s about time that you asked Anon and Twi If they would be willing to follow you into an obvious trap.
  1215. >Sighing, you, once again, try to focus as Mr. Doodle lectures on the works of H. P. Lovecraft.
  1216. >If you could care any less about a single author, you have yet to read any of their works.
  1217. >Seriously, Isaac fucking Asimov would be more interesting than this shit.
  1218. >At least you are on the same level as the other students in this class.
  1219. >”Miss Shimmer ay attention!”
  1220. “What?”
  1221. >Mr. Doodle glares.
  1222. >”I had asked you ‘why is the narrator’s casual dismissal of Pickman’s critics important to the plot of the story?’”
  1223. >Fuck, time to bullshit.
  1224. “It shows a willingness to overlook the norms of his society, and, uh...”
  1225. >The frown on Mr. Doodle’s face shows that he can see through your attempt.
  1226.  
  1227. >You were forced to stay after class and endure a ten-minute tirade on why you need to pay attention in class.
  1228. >Most of it you've either already knew, or had been told back when you were queen bitch of the school.
  1229. >Still you are now on your way to the cafeteria.
  1230. >Just as you enter, Flash quite literally shoves passed you, looking like he’s about to either strangle someone or cry his eyes out.
  1231. >Unsure which possibility is worse, you consider going after him, but a glance at the clock tells you that you only have a half hour to go.
  1232. >You quickly come to a decision.
  1233. “Flash, are you okay?”
  1234. >”Just fuck O… Oh, uh Sunset, hey uh, listen, I just need some space right now. I‘ll see you later okay?”
  1235. >without waiting for a response, Flash takes off.
  1236. >Not entirely sure what to do, you turn back to the cafeteria door and open it.
  1237. >Finally entering the cafeteria, you find a scene not too unfamiliar to you.
  1238. >Hundreds of students eating, talking, and just generally enjoying the break from the school day.
  1239. >Even with the enhanced senses your powers give you, it takes a moment to find the two people you are looking for.
  1240. >Anon is, like usual, in a corner with Norman, both of whom look a bit confused and a little scared.
  1241. >Twilight is sitting with The rest of your friends closer to the center of the room.
  1242.  
  1243. >With only a few seconds of thought, you walk over to Anon and Norman.
  1244. “Hey Anon, Norman, you guys know what’s up with Flash?”
  1245. >Norman crosses his arms, sighing.
  1246. >”Honestly Sunset, I don’t think it’s really my place...”
  1247. “Look, Norman, I just had Flash almost tell me to ‘fuck off’, so I don’t think that he’s in any place to tell me what the hell is going on.”
  1248. >Anon places a hand on your shoulder, giving it a soft but comforting squeeze.
  1249. >”Sunset, Flash just lost his Dad.”
  1250. >You can feel the blood drain from your face.
  1251. “What?”
  1252. >Norman nods.
  1253. >”Yeah, what’s worse is that when they found him, Mr. Sentry had the word ‘Defiler’ seared on what was left of his forehead.”
  1254. “I... What… Why?”
  1255. >You look between Norman and Anon, but neither answers you.
  1256. >You sit with them for a while, just having a moment of silence for the deceased man.
  1257. >After a moment you finally manage to pull yourself together enough to get to the reason why you came to the cafeteria in the first place.
  1258. “Anon, would come with me? I need to talk to you for a minute.”
  1259. >Standing up the two of you walk over to the table that your friends are sitting at.
  1260. >It only takes Twilight a second to end the argument, er, conversation she and Rainbow are having, and with that, you, Anon, and Twilight leave the cafeteria.
  1261.  
  1262.  
  1263. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  1264. >Tonight you are going to help Adagio Dazzle, the leader of the Dazzlings and a thousand-year-old siren turned super-powered thug, break into a laboratory that may or may not belong to a supposedly defunct Nazi splinter group that made the fucking S.S. look like Buddhist monks.
  1265. >All while trying to keep this little excursion a secret from S.H.I.E.L.D.
  1266. >And Rainbow thinks keeping up with homework and soccer practice is hard
  1267. >You glance at your phone.
  1268. >9:57
  1269. >Pulling your costume on all the way, you send a text to Twilight.
  1270. ‘u ready?’
  1271. >’*You, and yes, I’ll be at your apartment soon.’
  1272. ‘nerd ;p’
  1273. >The light in your living room changes drastically as Twilight literally rips a hole in reality from her bedroom.
  1274. “That’s really cool, Twi.”
  1275. >Twilight blushes.
  1276. >”Thanks, so uh, when is, uh, when’s Anon gonna get here? Or are we supposed to meet him somewhere?”
  1277. “He should be here in the next few minutes.”
  1278.  
  1279. >After Anon arrived, the three of you discussed a backup plan, in case this really was a trap.
  1280. >With a backup plan in place, you take one last look at the wall.
  1281. >10:45
  1282. >Time to go.
  1283. >One reality-defying portal later, the three of you are standing in the middle of MIT.
  1284. >About 10 minutes from the “agreed” to meeting spot.
  1285. “Well, time to get to work.”
  1286.  
  1287. >When you reach Kendall Square, Adagio is waiting.
  1288. >”Huh, with the amount of time it took you to get here, I’d have thought that you’d have brought at least a Quinjet or two.”
  1289. >Before you can retort, Anon interrupts.
  1290. >”Sorry lady, if you wanted the Avengers you should have gone to them.”
  1291. >Adagio rolls her eyes.
  1292. >”Regardless, I think it’s about time we went over how we’re going to get Sonata out of there.”
  1293. >Looking to the building that Adagio’s pointing at, you are once again struck with second thoughts.
  1294. >Twilight sums up your thoughts rather succinctly.
  1295. >”Polyp Genetics? I’m sorry but why would they be holding your sister? And why would they-”
  1296. >Adagio cuts her off.
  1297. >”If you are quite through we need to get moving, shift change for the guards only lasts around five minutes.”
  1298.  
  1299. >Not quite ten minutes later you find yourself crammed in an air duct in the sub-basement of Polyp Genetics between Anon and Twilight.
  1300. >Though you would prefer to leave the Hydra takedowns to Captain America, or any of the Avengers really, you can’t help but feel a small rush of excitement.
  1301. >Still you know that you should not be doing this with a possible enemy, two heroes with very little training, and absolutely no backup.
  1302. >Well, not like you can turn back now.
  1303. >You are broken from your thoughts by your face becoming better acquainted with Anon’s rear then you would have liked, followed by Adagio whispering just loud enough for the three of you to hear.
  1304. >”We’re here.”
  1305. >With that said she slowly removes an air grate and rather quietly drops into the room below.
  1306. >Next you lower Anon into the room by way of a web stuck to his back.
  1307. >You follow by crawling out onto the ceiling and down the nearest wall.
  1308. >Twilight levitates herself down into the room, silently magicking the grate back into place.
  1309. >With the four of you in what you now realize is a disused laboratory, you feel the need to ask Adagio a question that has been on your mind since you entered the air duct.
  1310. “So, Adagio, what’s the plan for getting us out of here alive?”
  1311. >Adagio turns to you with a smirk.
  1312. >”I think you’ll have something figured out by the time we need that.”
  1313. >You can almost hear Anon’s facepalm.
  1314. >”So we’re here, in the middle of one of Hydra’s bases, trying to break out a prisoner, without an escape plan?’
  1315. >He also mutters something under his breath but you aren’t quite close enough to hear it.
  1316. >And regardless, you have a mission to complete.
  1317.  
  1318. >You peak out the nearest door, checking the hallway beyond.
  1319. >Almost as soon as you do, you pull your head back and, quietly as you can, close the door.
  1320. >Two guards are standing in the hallway, luckily neither are facing towards the door you just closed.
  1321. >You turn to the three other occupants of the room.
  1322. “Alright, we’ve got two guards outside, does anyone have something that could knock them out?”
  1323. >Adagio smirks, opening her mouth, but before she can say anything Twilight speaks up.
  1324. >”Well, I, uh, I’ve been practicing something I read in one of the Doctor’s book. It could work, but I haven’t quite been able to get it to work without it affecting me.”
  1325. >Once again Adagio tries to speak only to be cut off, this time by yourself.
  1326. “It’s better than nothing.”
  1327. >And with that Twilight creeps up to the door, eases it open, places her hands just on the other side, and mutters a spell before quickly shutting the door.
  1328. >A second later you hear the two guards slump to the ground.
  1329. “What the hell was that Twilight?”
  1330. >Twilight rubs the back of her head.
  1331. >”The Mists of Morpheus, they cause people to fall into a deep sleep. We shouldn’t have to worry, though, they only last as long as the spellcaster channels them.”
  1332. >Adagio finally manages to voice her thoughts, uninterrupted by the rest of you.
  1333. >”And how long will the guards be under for exactly?”
  1334. >You can almost taste the venom dripping from her voice.
  1335. >Twilight seems not to notice as she answers Adagio’s question as if she is a teacher asking for the answer to a math problem.
  1336. >”The Mists will keep them unconscious for two days unless someone uses the counterspell.”
  1337. >You sigh, feeling relief swell in your chest.
  1338. “Anon, Adagio, bring the guards inside and prop them against the wall.”
  1339. >Anon jumps to it, being used to you calling the shots.
  1340. >Adagio hesitates for a moment, then joins Anon in the hall.
  1341.  
  1342. >Another few minutes sees the four of you creeping through the underground complex.
  1343. >While the “Mists” were very effective, their wide range, and extreme potency, made them dangerous to use in such close quarters.
  1344. >Though you Anon and Adagio seemed able to incapacitate most of the guards easily enough.
  1345. >So now you find yourselves standing just outside a slightly less abandoned laboratory than the one you entered from.
  1346. >Inside the lab, two researchers are doing some form of analysis on what looks like it could be blood.
  1347. >And just on the other side of them is the reason you are here.
  1348. >Sonata Dusk, the youngest dazzling.
  1349. >Turning to the three other people in your party, you ask the only question on your mind right now.
  1350. “How are we going to get in there?”
  1351. >Adagio stands, walks over to the door, then walks into the room as if she weren’t just breaking back into the Hydra base that was her prison for some time.
  1352. >All you can do is stare as Adagio screeches at the scientists, throwing them into the holding cell sending a spiderweb of cracks through the glass.
  1353. >Another screech and the cell walls shatter, freeing the siren trapped inside.
  1354. >The moment the walls are down Anon grabs your shoulder, spinning you around.
  1355. >”Sunset, I think that person we fought six months ago is back.”
  1356. “What do you mean? Which one?”
  1357. >Before Anon can elaborate, you see a blue flash and hear an all to familiar voice.
  1358. [HOPE]
  1359.  
  1360.  
  1361. >A dozen Hydra guards stand in a rather poorly lit room, with an elegantly dressed monstrosity of a man sitting behind an almost opulently ornate desk.
  1362. >The silence that had, up until this point dominated the room is shattered as the human chimera cackles.
  1363. >”So you just let an Equestrian hybrid, one of only three in the world, just walk out the front door?”
  1364. >The “man” laughs again, as though he found the whole thing humorous.
  1365. >”This is what? The second time you incompetent fools have let one of our experiments walk free. But surely you three have some excuse that you think will placate me? Well go ahead, I’m waiting.”
  1366. >The guard in the center is the first to speak up.
  1367. >”Di-director, sir, we, uh that is to say...”
  1368. >The jovial look on the things face slips off, leaving exasperation.
  1369. >”Just shut up. I don’t really care. All of you have failed me, but more importantly, you have failed Hydra. I’ve been monumentally forgiving with all of you up until now. But tonight you have proven to be prohibitively incompetent. So, starting tonight we will be starting something that might just fix that.”
  1370. >Standing up, the creature reaches under the table, placing a well-polished bronze sword on the table.
  1371. >”Mr. Barns, please step forward.”
  1372. >The man in question walks haltingly up to the beast’s desk.
  1373. >”Yes, Director?”
  1374. >The chimera grins.
  1375. >”Since you seem to be the least incompetent member of the facility’s guards, you get the honor of culling the weak.”
  1376.  
  1377.  
  1378. >You are Sunset Shimmer.
  1379. >Two weeks have passed since your daring rescue of Sonata from a Hydra base in Boston.
  1380. >Since then Sonata has decided to join you and Anon in your training.
  1381. >”No, Sonata, you need to /redirect/ the punch.”
  1382. >Speaking of Sonata…
  1383. >”But that’s silly, I can just use my ring! It’ll totally take it!”
  1384. >Ant-man face-palms.
  1385. >”And when the ring runs out of power?”
  1386. >Sonata smiles, not quite seeming understanding what Orion means, and places the hand with the ring into the top end of her indigo staff.
  1387. >”Tor lorek san, bor nakka mur, Natromo faan tornek wot ur. Ter Lantern ker lo Abin Sur, Taan lek lek nok, Formorrow Sur!”
  1388. [Charge at 100%]
  1389. >If Orion had super-strength, you think his hand would have shattered his skull.
  1390. >”Alright, enough for today. Just… Sonata, try to… just… ugh. You know what, never mind. You two have a good night.”
  1391. >And with that he leaves you and Sonata alone in the base’s gym.
  1392. “You’re going to have to learn some kind of hand to hand combat eventually you know.”
  1393. >Sonata shrugs.
  1394. >”It’s not like you and Nonny won’t be out there too.”
  1395. “But that’s just it, me and Anon might be caught up with other things, fighting or trying to save civilians or something. Point is, we might not be able to come to your rescue.”
  1396. >Sonata averts her gaze, focusing instead on her shoes.
  1397. >She mutters something that you don’t quite catch.
  1398. “What was that.”
  1399. >Sonata still doesn’t meet your eyes.
  1400. >”I just don’t want to hurt anybody.”
  1401. >That catches you off guard.
  1402. >Sonata didn’t /seem/ to have any problem with causing harm to people at the Battle of the Bands.
  1403. >”I don’t even know why, but I just feel sick when I even just, like, think about hurting people. Which is, like, totally weird! I used to really like it when people were sad or angry, even without the Gem!”
  1404. >Sweet Celestia, this girl really needs help, and not the kind that wears tights… Well, not normally anyway.
  1405. >But unfortunately, Professor Xavier returned to his school after Anon’s scarab activated and hasn’t returned.
  1406. >Sonata finally looks you in the eye.
  1407. >”Is there something wrong with me?”
  1408. >You don’t even think before answering.
  1409. “The fact that you are willing to ask that question means that you are on the right path, at least.”
  1410. >Sonata smiles, if a little sheepishly.
  1411. “But I think that you should talk with Ant-man about what you told me.”
  1412.  
  1413.  
  1414. >You are John Constantine.
  1415. >Sorcerer, exorcist, master of the dark arts et cetera et cetera.
  1416. >And you just got shot.
  1417. >Kind of par for the course really.
  1418. >It’s almost sad that getting shot has become such a common occurrence for you that it's become mundane.
  1419. >Though you are effectively immortal since your soul has been claimed by the three Lords of Hell.
  1420. >Your hell.
  1421. >Not /your/ Hell, but the Hell from your home dimension.
  1422. >This multiple multiverses thing is bloody confusing.
  1423. >And it sure as shit isn't helped by the dime-sized hole in your thigh.
  1424. >Speaking of that niggling little problem, you've arrived at your destination.
  1425. > A small clinic located in hell's kitchen.
  1426. >One run by one Dr. Palmer, or as all of her patients refer to her, the Night Nurse.
  1427. >As you stumble into the waiting room you notice two things.
  1428. >First is Daredevil sitting in the corner; fucker probably got stabbed.
  1429. >Second is the girl, likely Palmer’s nurse, standing next to Daredevil, talking to a white rabbit.
  1430. >What caught your eye wasn't her talking to the rabbit.
  1431. >No, what caught your eye was that the rabbit seemed to be listening.
  1432. >And quite intently at that.
  1433. “’Scuse me miss, but it seems I've gone and got myself in a bit of trouble with the wrong sort, and got myself plugged for the trouble. Would you be a dear and go grab your boss, and let her know that Constantine’s got himself shot. Again.”
  1434. >The girl turns pale, quite possibly paler than the rabbit, and sprints out of the room and off to where ever the good doctor is.
  1435. >Hopefully.
  1436. >It’s at this point that Daredevil speaks up.
  1437. >”Good to know that it isn't just the Avengers that get to come back from the grave.-
  1438. “Sod off, Stevie Wonder.”
  1439. >”Hmm, still an irreverent ass I see.”
  1440. “Still oddly perceptive for a defense attorney, I see.”
  1441.  
  1442. >You are Fluttershy.
  1443. >Tonight you’ve been helping your mom run her clinic.
  1444. >It's been really scary, but also a little fun.
  1445. >Plus Angel’s been on his best behavior, just like he promised.
  1446. >But that was before that Constantine man burst through the door.
  1447. >Your not sure what scares you more, the fact that he was so flippant about having been shot.
  1448. >Or how much he scared Angel.
  1449. >You've seen the bunny angry, and dismissive of people before, but never afraid.
  1450. >Goodness, you've even seen him give Barry a hard time, and Barry's a full grown Grizzly!
  1451. >but you don't have time for that, someone's in need of help and Mom's the only one that can help!
  1452. >Just as you round the corner, you see the woman you are looking for helping Luke Cage onto a pair of crutches.
  1453. >”Alright Mr. Cage, that should do it. I'd tell you to take it easy for the next week, but I've been helping heroes long enough to know better. Just try not to break any more limbs for at least another month.”
  1454. >Mr. Cage laughs.
  1455. >”I’ll do what I can, Doc, but you know how it goes.”
  1456. >Mom just sighs.
  1457. >Now seems like a good time to speak up.
  1458. >Oh! But what if Mr. Cage needs a prescription still or a Physical therapy appointment!
  1459. >You wouldn’t want him to have to wait much longer!
  1460. >But Mr. CoConstantine’s been shot!
  1461. >And heavens only know how much blood he's lost already!
  1462. >”Fluttershy? What's wrong dear?”
  1463. >Oh no! You've been standing here a long time, haven’t you?!
  1464. >And this whole time Mr. Constantine's been waiting for you to get Mom!
  1465. “Mr. Constantine sent me to get you because he's been shot, but you were talking to Mr. Cage, and he makes Angel so scared! Mr. Constantine, I mean, not you Mr. Cage! Angel really likes you, or at least he seems to. But I just….-
  1466. >You just sort of trail off, as Mom and Mr. Cage look at you intently.
  1467. >It makes you feel self-conscious.
  1468. >Mr. Cage speaks first.
  1469. >”Did you just say, Constantine? As in John Constantine? Asshole número uno, and self-titled ‘Maser of the Dark Arts'? Okay, this I have to see.”
  1470. >At that the three of you head out to the waiting room.
  1471. >As you enter the Waiting room, you try to stay out of the way.
  1472. >Well, that is until Mom calls you over and tells you to take Mr. Constantine to one of the exam rooms.
  1473. >But it gives you a chance to get out of the horribly crowded waiting room.
  1474. >Well, maybe not /horribly/ crowded, but definitely too many people that you don’t know very well.
  1475. >Though the entire time you are showing him to the exam room he keeps looking at you like a kid looking at a mall Santa.
  1476. >Apprehension and excitement are warring across his face.
  1477. >”So, do you talk to rabbits often? Or was tonight a special occasion?”
  1478. >Being put on the spot like this makes you feel even more nervous than before.
  1479. >And when you feel nervous it just get’s harder to talk.
  1480. >So you just shake your head.
  1481. >”Now that’s interesting, do they often talk back?”
  1482. >You aren’t quite sure how he knew what you meant, but it helps you feel a little more at ease.
  1483. “Not always, but they’re usually very polite.”
  1484. >The man nods.
  1485. >”And they aren’t the only ones that you can talk to, are they?”
  1486. >You can feel your face heat up.
  1487. “N-no.”
  1488. >He smiles, not much, but enough that you notice.
  1489. >”I have a friend that can do something similar, only he talks to plants instead.”
  1490. >That manages to get a chuckle out of you.
  1491. >Which gets a chuckle out of him.
  1492. >You leave the exam room, feeling better about this whole experience.
  1493. >But one thing still bothers you, why was Angel so afraid of him?
  1494.  
  1495. >As the girl leaves the exam room you can’t help but feel odd.
  1496. >She has a rather strong connection to the Red.
  1497. >Just about as strong as Swamp Thing’s connection to the Green, now that you think about it.
  1498. >But you also know that this place doesn’t have a Green or a Red or a Grey that are anywhere close to on par with what your Earth has.
  1499. >So how could there be an avatar of the Red?
  1500. >You know that back on your Earth the Avatar of the Green is chosen by the Parliament of Trees.
  1501. >And you assume that it works similarly with the Red and the Grey, you never really cared enough to research those.
  1502. >After about a minute, Palmer finally comes in.
  1503. >”So this makes how many times you’ve needed my help now?”
  1504. “Since I got first got here, or since I got back?”
  1505. >She gives you a blank look.
  1506. “Fine, fine. Seven, including being the midwife for Anon's birth. And speaking of the lad…”
  1507. >She gives you a look of admonishment.
  1508. >”If you'd actually kept watching over him, you’d know that Annabell more or less cut him off from anyone that could have known you.”
  1509. >You figured as much.
  1510. >The two of you sit in silence, only occasionally interrupted by Palmer pricking you with the needle.
  1511. >After a minute or two of this, you finally speak up.
  1512. “Your nurse...”
  1513. >As soon as you say the word ‘nurse’ Palmer corrects you.
  1514. >”Daughter.”
  1515. “Er, daughter, right. Anyway, did you know that she's got powers?”
  1516. >Palmer looks at you like you just told her that the sky is purple and made of cream.
  1517. >”What on Earth makes you say that?”
  1518. >At this point she’s finished suturing your wound.
  1519. “Just call it intuition.”
  1520. >Palmer wraps a bandage around your thigh.
  1521. >”Regardless, you’re ready to go. Just try not to get shot again.”
  1522. >You chuckle and say,
  1523. “What, no lollipop for being a good boy?”
  1524. >Palmer gently lays her hand on the bandage, right over your new stitches.
  1525. >”If it weren’t for the fact that it’d mean I’d break the sutures and need to resew them, I’d slap your bullet wound, John.”
  1526. >You just laugh.
  1527.  
  1528.  
  1529. >You are Anonymous.
  1530. >And lying in your arms is the love of your life, Sunset Shimmer.
  1531. >Right now life is perfect.
  1532. >Nothing could make you feel down, not with this beautiful woman gently resting against your chest.
  1533. }Wake up meat.
  1534. >Nope, nothing’s gonna take this away from you!
  1535. }Meat, you requested to be woken up at 6:00, it is now 6:02
  1536. “Fine.”
  1537. >And just like that, you are torn from the wonderful world that is your dreams, and are tossed, groggy and aching, back to reality.
  1538. >Fuck! You hate waking up.
  1539. >But at least today is the last day of the school year.
  1540. >It is also the last day you have to worry about high school for the rest of your life.
  1541. >That’s right, you actually managed to graduate high school!
  1542. >Albeit by the skin of your teeth.
  1543. >Regardless, you still need to go to the graduation ceremony, walk up to Principal Celestia, and receive your diploma.
  1544. }Your worthless pieces of pulped wood are as meaningless as your lives.
  1545. >As difficult as it is, you ignore the genocidal alien bug-robot that’s fused to your spine and continue preparing for the day.
  1546. >The knowledge that you're done with the bullshit that is high school keeps you in good spirits as you find a note from your grandmother letting you know that she’s “out.”
  1547. }Why does the geriatric continue to attempt to mate? Surely her body is long past the time when she would be capable of carrying a fetus to term.
  1548. >With the horrifying image of your grandma having sex, you’re off to your last day of school.
  1549.  
  1550. >Two hours later you are waiting for Norman and Flash to enter the gym.
  1551. >Unlike Crystal Prep, Canterlot High just doesn’t have the funds to rent out a sports arena for the entire afternoon.
  1552. >Not that you care either way, the sooner this gets done, the better.
  1553. >Nervously, you glance around, catching first Twilight's eye then Sunset’s.
  1554. >Twilight smiles and waves, causing Flash to do the same.
  1555. >Twilight rolls her eyes and looks away.
  1556. >Sunset, on the other hand, blushes and looks away.
  1557. >What’s that all about?
  1558. >It’s unusual to see Sunset embarrassed or flustered.
  1559. >Well unless someone brings up the whole raging the demon thing.
  1560. }Perhaps the female is in heat? That is something that you lower lifeforms do.
  1561. ‘I don’t think so.’
  1562. }Is that why the geriatric continues to attempt procreating?
  1563. ‘I’m not dignifying that with a response.’
  1564. >After a few moments of awkward silence, Luna opens the doors to the gym and ushers everyone in.
  1565. >As you pass by Luna the scarab shudders slightly.
  1566. >You want to ask it why, but just can’t find it in yourself to care.
  1567. >Finding your seat, you wait for the ceremony to start.
  1568. >A minute after you sit down, Celestia walks up to the podium and begins a long and very boring speech about change and moving on and not giving up and how proud she is of all of you.
  1569. >By the time she’s finished, you’d swear that at least ten minutes have passed.
  1570. >Everyone in the makeshift auditorium applauds, even those that almost fell asleep like Rainbow Dash.
  1571. >Soon enough Luna begins walking between the rows of chairs ensuring that each row starts moving as soon as the last person from each is on their way.
  1572. >When Luna reaches your row, the scarab shutters again, this time almost violently enough to make you lose your balance.
  1573. }Meat, be cautious. I am detecting two power rings in the area.
  1574. ‘Where?’
  1575. }There are too many lifeforms in the area for my sensors.
  1576. ‘Well, that’s just great.’
  1577. }I fail to see any positives in this situation.
  1578. >You roll your eyes.
  1579. ‘Keep alert, but don’t do anything to draw attention to us. The last thing we need is to make a scene.’
  1580. }Very well, I will stay in infiltration mode and cede tactical judgment to you.
  1581. >By now you’ve almost reached the podium.
  1582. >Celestia finishes handing the person in front of you their diploma and grabs yours.
  1583. >Stepping in front of her, you reach out to shake her hand.
  1584. >As she reaches out a ruby glint catches your eye.
  1585. >But before you can get a good look, Celestia snatches your hand gripping it tight enough that you can feel it through your gloves and the scarab’s armor.
  1586. >She leans forward, diploma in one hand, with yours still firmly clenched in the other.
  1587. >”I hope you enjoyed your time here, Mr. Incognito.”
  1588. >Her already tight grip likely would have been able to crack bone, if your hands hadn’t already been thoroughly destroyed by your use of the scarab.
  1589. >”And I hope you’ll be better able to keep your little blue problem under control.”
  1590. >The worst part is that through the entire exchange, Celestia keeps a motherly smile on her face.
  1591. >To almost anyone else she seems to be an island of calm in a sea of service, excited young adults.
  1592. >Not to you, though.
  1593. >No, to you Principal Celestia is a font of rage.
  1594. >A living wellspring of righteous hatred.
  1595. >Hatred so powerful her hand feels like it was just taken out of a fire.
  1596. }Meat, your analysis is correct. This one is thirty-two degrees hotter than it should be.
  1597. >This leaves you confused but still wary.
  1598. ‘Who?’
  1599. >Then you notice it, on her right middle finger.
  1600. >A ring, carved from, what looks like, pure ruby.
  1601. >Wait, no, not ruby, more like frozen blood and the embers of a dying star.
  1602. >Quickly you shift your focus back to Celestia’s face, swallowing your fear.
  1603. >Or at least trying to.
  1604. >”Well, I think we’ve held things up long enough.”
  1605. >Celestia laughs, though to you it sounds almost hollow.
  1606. >The rest of the ceremony passes by in a daze, the rest of your class gets their diplomas, Twilight makes a speech, and soon everyone is slowly making their way out of the makeshift auditorium.
  1607. >As people leave the peel off to meet with friends, family, even those teachers that have already finished clearing out their rooms for the summer.
  1608. >Once you make it outside, the fresh air snaps you out of your daze.
  1609. >And just in time, it seems, as Norman’s dad walks over.
  1610. >”Anon.”
  1611. “Mr. Castle”
  1612. >Even though you’ve known him most of your life, you’ve never felt comfortable around Mr. Castle.
  1613. >The man has a gruff and stoic personality to him, and not in an endearing or fun way.
  1614. >You guess it comes from his time in the Marine Corps, but you’ve never really been sure.
  1615. >Not to mention that he would often disappear for weeks on end, leaving Norman with you and Dad, or Grandma after...
  1616. >It’s not important, what is, though, is that you’re finally done with this place.
  1617. >You take one last look around, seeing Orian and Mrs. Sparkle doting on Twilight, while Rainbow’s parents do much the same.
  1618. >Fluttershy’s hiding over by her mother, who looks you straight in the eye for a moment, her expression unreadable.
  1619. >Rarity’s hugging a bawling Sweetie Belle, likely crying just as hard, though you can’t tell with her back turned to you.
  1620. >You can’t see Applejack, though you figure that she’s around.
  1621. >Flash’s mom is hugging him and likely telling him how proud his father would have been.
  1622. >And standing awkwardly to one side, Sunset Shimmer is looking at her friends, looking, you can’t quite place the emotion.
  1623. >Sad? Happy? Nostalgic?
  1624. >Fuck if you know, but looking at her face makes you want to just walk over their and talk to her, just to get her out of whatever kind of funk she’s in.
  1625. ‘Alright, Anon, deep breaths.’
  1626. >You make the nerve-wracking journey over to Sunset, feeling bolder with every step.
  1627. >Until you finally make it over to her side.
  1628. >Then the best that you can do is just awkwardly stare in her general direction.
  1629. >FUCK! You can talk to her like normal when you two are in costume, so why can’t you do it now!?
  1630. >Maybe if you imagined her in her Spider-suit?
  1631. >Another deep breath.
  1632. “Uh, S-Sunset?”
  1633. >Real smooth Anon.
  1634. }Would it help if I took over?
  1635. >Before you can respond, Sunset turns to look at you, and you feel your brain just kind of melt.
  1636. >”Oh, Anon! What is it?”
  1637. “I-I was wondering,”
  1638. >You take a deep breath.
  1639. “Would you like to go out for coffee sometime?”
  1640. >Sunset looks pensive for a moment.
  1641. >Then she smiles, it’s just a small smile, but it’s full of genuine happiness.
  1642. >”Sure, how about tomorrow? I don’t have anything going on you?”
  1643. >And just like that, her small smile is mirrored on your face.
  1644.  
  1645. >You are Applejack Apple.
  1646. >It's been two weeks since graduation.
  1647. >Earlier today Granny Smith asked you to clean out the loft in the barn.
  1648. >That was three hours ago, and you have just barely made a dent.
  1649. >You’d swear that your family’s been storing things up here since the dawn of time.
  1650. >Though it is an interesting experience, looking through almost three-quarters of a century of family history.
  1651. >But much of it needs to go, so it’s up to you to figure out what is garbage and what are priceless heirlooms.
  1652. >Among other things, you’ve separated out an old box that belonged to great grandpa Apfelbaum emblazoned with the Nazi eagle and swastika, Granny Smith’s wedding dress, and what you can only assume is an old storm lantern.
  1653. >That last one you only decided to keep because it was your great uncle Cortland’s footlocker.
  1654. >Granny’d skin you alive if you threw any of her older brother’s things.
  1655. >After she treated you to a lecture on the history of the Apple clan, from their time in what became Kazakhstan, to how Cortland Apple sacrificed his life flying medivac in ‘Nam.
  1656. >Though this is your first time seeing this particular lantern.
  1657. >despite the age of the age of the lantern, it is still covered with a layer of some kind of green varnish.
  1658. >Now that you are looking at it, the green seems less like a layer over the outside of the lantern, and more like the actual color of the metal.
  1659. “What in tarnation?”
  1660. >At first you thought that it was just a trick of the light, but the lantern is giving off light.
  1661. >Not the steady blue-white glow you’d expect from a modern LED, the hazy, off-white light of an incandescent, or the flickering yellow-white of a kerosene lantern.
  1662. >The light that the lantern is throwing off is a pale green.
  1663. >Setting the strange lantern off to the side, you return to sorting out the garbage.
  1664. >Albeit at a much faster pace.
  1665. >You need to finish this job first so that Granny doesn’t tan your hide.
  1666. >But once you’re finished up here, you’re going straight to Granny and asking about that damned lantern.
  1667.  
  1668.  
  1669. >You are Dr. Orion Sparkle, or as you are known in the superhero community, Ant-man.
  1670. >But right now you aren’t playing the part of the dashing hero, you’re just a concerned parent.
  1671. >Not because Tony “I-know-better-than-everyone” Stark wanted to summon the Avengers for some PR stunt again.
  1672. >No this time it’s because of Colonel Nick Fury.
  1673. >Earlier this week you received a letter from the Director of S.H.I.E.L.D. telling you to assemble the impromptu team of super-powered young adults you’ve been training.
  1674. >Well in the case of Sonata trying to train.
  1675. >It isn’t that you’re a bad teacher, nor that Sonata isn’t an eager student, just that the poor girl has the attention span of a coked-up chihuahua.
  1676. >However, apparently you aren’t here to have the Colonel discuss how your training’s been going.
  1677. >You are still finding it difficult to believe, but your students are being given the chance to form a S.H.I.E.L.D. sponsored team.
  1678. >It takes a few minutes after Fury says this for your students to come to terms with this.
  1679. >Surprisingly it’s Anon who speaks up.
  1680. >”So, what? We’re Avengers now?”
  1681. >He also whispered something, but you couldn’t quite make out what he said.
  1682. >”No, I’m reactivating the Defenders.”
  1683. >That catches you off guard.
  1684. >As far as know the Defenders were deactivated when one of their members was killed in some kind of gas explosion during an outing with his kid.
  1685. >But that was a couple of years before Hank passed on the mantle of Ant-Man to you.
  1686. >Still, it’s not often that S.H.I.E.L.D. brings a team out of retirement, even if only in name.
  1687. “Wait, wasn’t the Defenders a five-man team?”
  1688. >Fury’s stoic facade cracks just a bit, though you doubt you’d have even noticed it if you hadn’t been studying it so closely.
  1689. >”I’ve been monitoring several possible candidates. Your daughter is the first, Doctor.”
  1690. >At that you can’t help but stiffen.
  1691. >If Fury noticed he didn’t show it.
  1692. >”The other one is the daughter of one Doctor Palmer.”
  1693. >Sunset interrupts the Colonel mid-speech.
  1694. >“Wait, you're telling us Fluttershy has powers?”
  1695. >She turns to Anon and Sonata.
  1696. >”Did either of you know this?”
  1697. >The two shake their heads, looking as confused as Sunset.
  1698. >Fury, still looking like he had his emotions forcefully removed, clears his throat.
  1699. >”Regardless, Sunset, Anon, and Sonata, I want the three of you here tomorrow at 0630 to begin training with your new team. Any questions?”
  1700. >He looks at the four of you as if daring you to ask anything, for a brief moment.
  1701. >”Then dismissed.”

/k/ Anon & Spider Shim: A Very/k/ammando Christmas

by Spiderbloke2099

/k/ Anon and Spider Shimm 1

by Spiderbloke2099

/k/ Anon and Spider Shimm 2 (Interveiw with a blogger)

by Spiderbloke2099

/k/ Anon and Spider Shimm 3 (Date night)

by Spiderbloke2099

k/ Anon and Spider Shimm 4 (Anon makes a new friend)

by Spiderbloke2099