BiE 6: Spa life.


                                            =BiE 6=


                                            >About ten minutes after Aloe left, your first customer entered.

                                            >She stopped in the doorway as she caught sight of you.

                                            >She was an earth pony. She had a cream colored coat with a rich magenta mane. There was a rose on her backside.

                                            >She looked a bit nervous.

                                            >Okay, gotta relax her.

                                            >Break out the charm.

                                            >"Hello, my name is Mous and I'm going to be your masseur today. Feel free to lay down on the bed whenever you're ready."

                                            >C'mon, nice smile.

                                            >She seemed to relax a bit and started walking towards the bed.

                                            >You heard her hop up and lay down as you washed up at the sink in the rear of the room.

                                            >"Is there anywhere you would like particular attention be paid to miss...?"

                                            >Might as well see if there's anywhere that you could take care of quick.

                                            >Anything to make this as simple as possible.

                                            >"Roseluck." she says. "And right above my haunches has been killing my lately."

                                            >Okay. Haunches.

                                            >The fuck are haunches?

                                            >You do a quick run through of all your anatomical knowledge for the closest approximation.

                                            >If you had to guess...

                                            >Lower back?

                                            >You glance up at the shelf of lotions as you think.

                                            >You were probably supposed to use these.

                                            >Scanning over them, you see one marked "coconut".

                                            >Good enough.

                                            >You spread some lotion on your hands and get to work on your first customer.

                                            >Moment of truth...


                                            >For all your guesswork, you are rewarded with a content sigh as you start rubbing.

                                            >You try and alternate what sides you work on to similar results.

                                            >Are you supposed to talk during this?

                                            >Worth a shot.

                                            >"Yeah, I can feel a lot of tension back here."

                                            >Liar.

                                            >"If you don't mind my asking, what is it you do Roseluck?"

                                            Getting chummy with the customer? Ballsy.

                                            >She lets out another sigh.

                                            >"I work with my friends selling flowers, we've been rearranging our shop lately so there's been a lot of heavy lifting."

                                            >Okay that makes sense.

                                            >You try and think of where a pony would carry things on their back and focus your attention there, also making sure to get her legs and hoofs.

                                            >Conversation flows as freely as it can. Roseluck tells you about her business, her friends, and how she got her "cutie mark". The tattoo on her calf.

                                            >For your part, you explain how you got here; Anon, fall through that white void, landing on the outskirts of town and your visit with royalty.

                                            >You left out to part about Celestia's little meeting in the lower area near the garden.

                                            >You also didn't tell her about when she was talking to that guard.

                                            >Hey-oh.


                                            >As time passes on, you start to wonder how long this is supposed to last.

                                            >You've never had a massage before, your frame of reference is quite lacking.

                                            >Okay. The spa probably opens around 8. You ran into Rarity and Fluttershy just past 10.

                                            >They looked like they got more than just a massage so...

                                            >An hour?

                                            >You heard the pitter patter of hooves coming from the hall.

                                            >The sound gets close and you see Aloe walk by the door.

                                            >Oh thank god it's Aloe, you can work with that.

                                            >She peeks in to see how you're doing and you quietly mouth "How much longer?" as best you can.

                                            >She motions that you should be wrapping up before heading on her way.

                                            >You make your way back to Roseluck's haunches as you finish up.

                                            >You want to end this on a high note.

                                            >"Okay miss Roseluck, I've done my best. How are you feeling?"

                                            >She rises from the bed.

                                            >She has a far off look in her eye.

                                            >"You are very good with those hands of yours Mister Mous. I'll definitely have to come back here." she says as she walks out of the room.

                                            >"Tell your friends." you say, trying to be witty.

                                            >Alone in the room again, you revel in your small victory as you try to purge the smell of coconut from the room.

                                            >You aren't using coconut again for a while.


                                            >You have two more customers that day.

                                            >The first is some unbelievably large pegasus with a white coat.

                                            >You're amazed the guy didn't break the fucking bed.

                                            >At least you know that ponies have steroids now.

                                            >Your last customer of the day is a unicorn with a dark blue coat and mane that can only be described as "fabulous".

                                            >His only other discerning feature is the fact that his horn seems to be half again as long as other unicorns.

                                            >You tried to stay away from his horn, experience has taught you that if something looks that Freudian, you shouldn't touch it.


                                            >After your customers had gone and you were cleaning the putrid potpourri of stenches you had amassed in your room over the day, you heard what sounded like shouting coming from the front of the store.

                                            >You went to investigate.

                                            >The sounds were indeed shouting, they got more distinct as you got closer.

                                            >"-all know what goes on here!" came an angry male voice.

                                            >It kinda reminded you of Spider-man's boss at the newspaper.

                                            >"And what, pray tell, goes on here Mr. Whistleblower?"

                                            >That'd be Lotus.

                                            >"You know very well what goes on here! You and that sister of yours have set up a den of ill repute in our fair town!" came the gruff voice again.

                                            >As you walk into the front room, you see the scene at hand.

                                            >Aloe and Lotus were behind the counter trying to talk down a group of three ponies, a grey pegasus and orange unicorn flanked a brown earth pony in front of them.

                                            >An Earth Pony you could only assume was this Whistleblower guy.

                                            >"Aloe, Lotus, is this guy refusing to pay?" you ask.

                                            >That rustled his jimmies something fierce.

                                            >"I have never set foot in this horrid establishment until today! And I will not be insulted by a monster!" he all but hollered at you.

                                            >Monster? That almost annoyed you.

                                            >"Sir, what is it that you think we actually do in this "horrid establishment" that has your balls so bunched up?"

                                            >He didn't like that, you get the feeling he doesn't like much.

                                            >"Is this how your employees talk to ponies here!?" his face was getting red.

                                            >He mad.


                                            >"It is when those ponies insult those who work here." you say as you take a few steps toward him.

                                            >To his credit, he doesn't back down.

                                            >"And I asked you a question." you spit at him.

                                            >Remembering your question, he looks you straight in the eye.

                                            >"It is quite obvious that this "day spa" is a front for these to harlots to ply their vile trade in my town! I refuse to stand for that when there are children here!"

                                            >Insulting your cool bosses? No deal.

                                            >"Hey, leave them out of this. It's not their fault that they can do their job well enough to make people feel good." you say.

                                            >You kneel down a bit and get right in his face.

                                            >"And I wouldn't be so quick to judge if my job were "blowing whistles" champ." you make sure to add finger quotes to that.

                                            >Finger quotes piss everybody off.

                                            >It takes him a minute to get your innuendo, but when he does his scowl gets so big you swear he's going to crack his own teeth.

                                            >"How can you not see what is going on here?!" he shouts "The region those two come from is a haven for deviants who would run such a disgusting service! These two are probably laying with each other every night to prepare themselves for their customer!" This poor idiot doesn't hear how stupid he sounds.

                                            >You were about to counter with a particularly scathing insult about his mother, but Lotus speaks before you get a chance to.

                                            >"What my sister and I do is strictly between us Mr. Whistleblower." she says with a stern face.

                                            >"...and anyone we allow to watch."

                                            >Oh god your sides, it takes ever ounce of your willpower to keep your composure.

                                            >A boss who is not only cool enough to hire you rude ass, but has balls big enough to make a joke about fucking her sister while some prick is yelling at her?

                                            >Now you didn't just want to work here, you needed to work here.


                                            >Aloe can't contain herself and continues a giggling fit behind the counter.

                                            >Whistleblower, apparently not understanding heavy sarcasm, gets positively lucid.

                                            >"You admit it! I'll have this place closed! I'll have it torn down and the earth underneath paved over!"

                                            >He continues to rant and rave, you give a glance back to Lotus as she shakes her head.

                                            >Not in the mood for any more of this crap, you grab Whistleblower by the mane and start dragging him towards the door.

                                            >"What are you doing! Let go of me!" he's trying to wriggle out of your grip while his flunkies just stare.

                                            >You toss him out the front door and his henchmen follow to help him up.

                                            >They all stare at you.

                                            >"Mister Whistleblower, you have convinced me. Now you go away and go grab the authorities while I keep this hive of scum and villainy secure."

                                            >"This isn't over!" he shouts. "I will not stop until thi-"

                                            >You shut the door and his squawking stops.

                                            >The three of you simply enjoy the silence for a moment as that pain in the ass is gone.

                                            >Lotus looks at you with a small smile.

                                            >"Thank you Mous, that was very kind of you to stick up for us." she say.

                                            >"Yeah, *snrk!* thanks!" Aloe says as she tries to settle her laughter.

                                            >"It was a pleasure." you say. "If we're set for the day, I'm going to head out."

                                            >Lotus nods at you. "Of course Mous. Be here by 8:00 tomorrow morning for the day shift."

                                            >"Yes Ma'am." you say as you make way for the back door.

                                            >You stop as you're about to step out and turn to your bosses.

                                            >"You guys aren't really running this place as a front for a brothel, are you?"

                                            >Lotus doesn't meet your eyes as she goes over a schedule "Not since moving here."

                                            >She gives you a wink, prematurely settling your jimmies.

                                            >With a laugh you step out the back door and begin the walk home.


                                            >The sun is low on the horizon as you walk.

                                            >The wind blows the trees and you hear a symphony of leaves brush against each other.

                                            >It was really nice here, much better then where your apartment used to sit.

                                            >At least it doesn't smell like gas.

                                            >"Hey, Mous!" you hear from behind you.

                                            >To your surprise, Anon and Rainbow Dash come racing up to you carrying bags.

                                            >"Where've you been man? You were gone when we woke up." he asks

                                            >"You two lightweights crashed on the couch last night and were still out when I left. I went into town and got a job at the day spa." you smirk at him.

                                            >Rainbow looks puzzled.

                                            >"I dunno man, I heard that place was a front for some shady stuff." she says as she hovers at eye level.

                                            >You chuckle at the events of the day.

                                            >"It's not, don't worry. But you aren't the only one to think that."

                                            >"That's awesome man, I'll find a job in town tomorrow." Anon says

                                            >Your bro looks at you and holds up the bags he's carrying.

                                            >"Rainbro and I sold that bunch of crap we had on the tarp and used the money to replace all the booze we drank. We got a whole twenty bits for your stupid didgeridoo. We were thinking movie night again tonight?" he says with a smile.

                                            >Dammit, it wasn't your didgeridoo. You don't know how it got there.

                                            >But that wasn't important.

                                            >"Rainbro?" you ask.

                                            >He looks at her and smiles."Yeah man, she helped fix the house and help get rid of all the crap without even asking. Add that in with the fun we had last night and I'd say it's bro material."

                                            >Your first Equestria bro?

                                            >You're game.

                                            >The more bros the better.

                                            >You smile and look at your bros."I'm down for movies, but I'm not watching The fucking Room again."

                                            >Anon laughs. "That's cool man, we can find something else."

                                            >"Something Else" wound up being some movie where Vin Deisel had to babysit some fucking kids.

                                            >Next time, you pick the movie.